December 1, 2024 • 32 mins
Text us your feedback on this episode
In this episode, Lunden reflects on some questions about her 36 years alive. Whether it was your birthday recently or not, these questions are powerful to ponder any time of the year. Tune in!
Timestamps to help you navigate this episode:
0:00 Intro
0:24 FREE Self Love & Sweat MONTHLY Calendar
3:32 Life Lessons at 36
6:19 Courage and Growth: Moving To A New State
12:33 Letting Go and Moving Forward
22:07 Shifting Gears for A New Perspective
FREE Self Love & Sweat Monthly Life Coaching Calendar: http://lifelikelunden.com/calendar
2 FREE HIGH INTENSITY RESISTANCE TRAINING WORKOUTS: https://lifelikelunden.activehosted.com/f/169
One-On-One Life Coaching & NLP with Lunden:
http://lifelikelunden.com/vip
Connect with Lunden:
IG: @lifelikelunden
YouTube: https://youtube.com/lundensouza
LinkedIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lundensouza/
Twitter: @lifelikelunden
Use code LUNDEN25 for a discount on Snap Supplements: https://bit.ly/snapsweat
Podcast Sound Design Intro & Outro: https://hitspotaudio.com/
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Lunden Souza (00:00):
Welcome to Self Love and Sweat the podcast, the
place where you'll get inspiredto live your life
unapologetically, embrace yourperfect imperfections and do
what sets your soul on fire.
I'm your host, Lunden Souza.
Hey, before we jump into thisepisode, I just want to make
(00:27):
sure that you get all the freethings possible, if you haven't
already.
You need to get your self-loveand sweat free monthly life
coaching calendar.
Honestly, the way to experiencedeep change in your life is by
doing small little things overtime, and so that's what you'll
(00:48):
find in this free calendar.
You can get it by going tolifelikelunden.
com/calendar.
Get yours for free and let'sget into today's episode.
Happy today and welcome back tothe podcast.
I turned 36 last month, which isso wild.
(01:12):
Sometimes I don't know if youguys are the same, but sometimes
I'll think about age and itjust like really trips me out.
Like I remember when my momturned 33.
I don't remember likespecifically what we did.
I don't remember like, yeah, Idon't know her birthday party or
what we did to celebrate.
I just remember my mom turning33.
(01:36):
And you know, we have theseembedded ideas or beliefs
embedded ideas or beliefs insociety that like, oh, this age
means this and by this age youshould be here and at this age
(02:00):
you should be making this muchmoney or be married and have
kids or just whatever.
And I think one thing that I amreally proud of it hasn't
always been easy, definitely noteasy.
For sure, not Even now itdoesn't feel super easy.
But one thing I'm really proudof myself is I've always kind of
(02:22):
written my own story, my ownversion of life.
That's really what Life LikeLunden is.
That's what my social mediachannels are Life Like Lunden.
And it's not like, hey, comeover here and do exactly what
I'm doing and live my same life.
That's not what it's about.
It's like the world is going totell you what it thinks you
(02:52):
should do or what you'resupposed to do.
But what is life like?
Insert your name.
What do you want to do?
What do you want to get out oflife?
What experiences do you want tohave?
What do you want to learn?
What does your growth path looklike?
And so, even though there havebeen a lot of highs and lows
(03:16):
with choosing to write my ownbook, let's say I'm really proud
of that, say I'm really proudof that and yeah.
So anyways, I wanted to sharereflections from my 36 years of
life.
And I've done like episodesbefore where I'm like 20 things
(03:37):
I learned in my 20s or I thoughtabout like 36 things I learned
at 36.
And then I was like, oh, whydon't we just ask chat GPT for
some questions for reflection?
And that's what I did.
So I asked chat GPT.
I was like, can you give mequestions to reflect on my 36th
birthday?
(03:58):
And then chat GPT wrote backand was like happy 36th birthday
.
Here are five reflectivequestions to help you celebrate,
gain insight and set intentionsfor the future.
So that's what we're going todo today.
We're going to go through allof these questions.
And then I asked for some moretoo.
So I just kind of copy andpasted some of my favorite ones.
(04:19):
But it doesn't have to be yourbirthday to use these questions
for reflection.
I think these are all reallypowerful questions.
Sometimes we can get caught upin watching a series on TV or
mindlessly scrolling.
So, honestly, I use ChatGPToften to give me questions to
(04:41):
just like journal about orreflect on or just get my brain
out of.
Yeah, just like scrolling,watching mindless stuff,
whatever.
So I love ChatGPT for manyreasons, but these questions are
straight from ChatGPT.
(05:02):
So what number one.
And this is kind of coolbecause we're at the end of the
year as well, so you can kind ofreflect on this last year, even
if it's not your birthday.
It doesn't have to be birthdayreflection questions or anything
.
But the first one is what am Imost proud of accomplishing in
the past year and why does itmatter to me the past year?
(05:29):
And why does it matter to me,what am I most proud of
accomplishing in this past year,in the past year, and why does
it matter to me?
I think what I'm most proud ofaccomplishing the last year is
this rebuild of my life andmoving to Utah Last July so it's
December now, but last July Icame to Utah for a month to hike
(05:50):
, or that was what I thought,and then I fell in love with it.
I did this most amazing hikecalled Bell's Canyon to Lower
Falls.
It's in the CottonwoodMountains and it is phenomenal.
And I did that hike and I waslike, oh, I'm not going anywhere
, I am staying here and I loveit and I'm very proud of that
(06:12):
decision and accomplishing allthat I have in this rebuild
right.
It's like moving somewhere new,establishing like where you're
going to live and what yourday-to-day looks like.
Even just finding my new gymand yoga studio and community.
(06:34):
I just finally I was thinkingabout this I'm like I don't
think I've ever lived somewherewhere I really knew my neighbors
, think I've ever livedsomewhere where I really knew my
neighbors, and so I'vedeveloped great relationships
with my neighbors and myneighborhood, created and
stepped into differentcommunities and, yeah, I met a
(06:55):
lot of really, really reallycool people.
In fact, elisa Marie was justover and we recorded a podcast
which actually I criedafterwards, I pressed stop
recording and then I just satthere with her and just tears
came down my eyes.
She's amazing.
She's someone I've met here inUtah whose story just continues.
Learning more and more abouther continues to just feed my
(07:18):
soul.
She's so incredible, but I mether.
I've met so many amazing peoplein Utah and so I think my
biggest accomplishment is just,yeah, what I'm most proud of
accomplishing is stepping out,moving somewhere new.
For no reason other than it waswhat I chose, because, when I
(07:45):
think about when I left myparents' house at 17, I moved to
Long Beach State to go tocollege.
I moved to Austria to work fora company called Runtastic and
at the time I was dating Joe andhe lived there too and worked
for Runtastic.
So I moved there for love andfor business or for work.
(08:05):
And then I moved back toAmerica because it was COVID and
that was really the only option.
I mean, I guess I could havestayed there while everything
was shut down, but I didn't wantto do that.
So I moved back and then when Ichose Utah, I was like, oh, I
could choose anywhere, I couldchoose anything.
And so I read this book that Ilove.
(08:26):
I read it a lot.
It's called Shadow Work byDanielle Massey, and by getting
deep down into our shadows andinto the dark parts of us and
clearing things out of oursubconscious, letting things
come up and metabolize, reallyhelped me understand how to and
(08:51):
the power of manifestation.
And so I went through thatwhole chapter of the book on how
to manifest truly and made alist of all the things I wanted
to experience and how it feltand tasted and smelled and just
everything.
And now I'm living thatmanifestation.
(09:13):
I remember sitting down with myjournal and just writing down
all the things I wanted toexperience, praying about it,
meditating on it, being nervousbut also excited about this to
reveal itself to me.
Anyways, it was just a veryinteresting process to choose to
move somewhere, all based on mychoice.
(09:33):
So I'm very proud of that andaccomplishing it.
And I remember there's justyeah, there's.
Things are hard when you're.
There are hard moments alwaysright, like no matter what,
there's going to be highs andlows and ups and downs.
And one thing that my mom saidto me which really inspired me,
I think, or just reminded me ofmy greatness.
(09:57):
You know, it's really easyMyself too.
It's like we get kind of caughtup in the like the yeah, in the
not so great parts, and I likedoing both.
I like looking at the not sogreat and the great, but
sometimes it's hard to see thegreatness within ourselves.
We're in a funk or a stuck spotor whatever.
(10:18):
And she was like I feel so proudof you.
She's like all the thingsyou're doing I did with your dad
.
We had two incomes comingtogether and it wasn't just me,
it was me and him.
And you're doing a lot of thisstuff by yourself.
You should be really proud ofyourself.
And I was like oh yeah, thanks,mom, I appreciate it.
Not that there's anything wrongwith combining forces and
(10:41):
creating a partnership andcombining income.
There's nothing wrong with thatat all.
But there were moments where Ijust felt a little bit
frustrated and not good enough.
And then when she said that, Iwas like, oh yeah, but you're
Lunden, party of one, and you'retaking care of yourself and
you're building businesses andyou're doing all of this, give
(11:02):
yourself a little bit of credit.
So when my mom said that thatwas really empowering and the
second part of this questionsays and why does it matter to
me?
I think it matters to me,especially now, because to
process and feel and heal ittakes a level of safety.
(11:25):
Your body has to feel.
Your body, your heart, yourspirit, your mind has to feel
safe in order to release anystuck emotions, trapped, traumas
, just anything that's holdingyou back.
I feel like over the last yearhas probably been the most
stable I've ever been.
(11:45):
Like I have oh my gosh, like mydream apartment.
I'm obsessed, like I can't I gooutside and I go for walks and
I'm like this is where I live,like this is wild, like it's
gorgeous.
There's not a rock out of place, there's a lake.
I can stand up paddleboard onmy like, I have easy access to
(12:08):
go, hike and explore pretty muchwherever I want, like there's
so much beauty in what I seewith my eyes opened and I, um,
yeah, I feel so grateful forthat right.
And also this has been a yearof so much coming up for me.
(12:33):
Yesterday I was on the floor inmy kitchen just sobbing and
wailing and just getting justlike getting out feelings that
are time to get out right, and Ithink I haven't been in a space
in a long time where I've beenable to slow down enough and
(12:54):
then feel safe enough to expressand then to have relationships
in my life of people that I'vemet, where I can express those
things safely and have it beokay to not feel okay and have
it be, you know, beautiful thatI want to.
You know, express and cry andfeel.
(13:15):
Um, it doesn't have to bejoyful and positive and happy
and amazing all the time.
Now that doesn't mean that I'mnot going to choose gratitude or
choose the next good, mostempowering thought.
(13:36):
There are going to be momentswhere things are messy, and so
that's the long answer to thatquestion is I'm proud of this
move over the last year and ofthe community I've created
within myself, like to me, fromme and then also the community
(13:57):
that I've built or connectedwith since being here.
And it matters to me because Ifinally feel like I'm in a safe
enough spot to feel and processand navigate and, yeah, just
feel deeply right, like I canfeel such joy and such bliss and
(14:20):
such inspiration and love.
And I can also feel like deepsorrow, sadness, despair, and
it's like sometimes there's noteven anything I don't know
particularly bad that'shappening.
It's just like the flow of thatfeminine energy.
It's like sometimes things comeup and I'm like I just need to
(14:42):
like cry and scream and I can dothat and I have the space to do
that.
And so that's the answer tothat question for me.
What other questions here?
What is one belief I'm ready tolet go of as I step into this
(15:13):
new chapter and what empoweringbelief can I replace it?
By the way, I didn't prepareany answers to any of these
questions, so as I'm readingthem, I kind of copied and
pasted some.
I'm like thinking of it as wego One belief I'm ready to let
go of as I step into thischapter and what empowering
belief can replace it?
(15:34):
I think the belief is like.
The belief is about, like Ithink in a lot of areas of my
(15:59):
life, I do a really good job ofnot waiting for the experience
on the outside to dictate howI'm feeling on the inside.
Right, Like feeling gratitudeahead of the experience, feeling
(16:22):
love and joy and peace, evenwhen things don't feel that way,
like I don't.
I definitely have a beautifulbelief that I love that we can't
wait for things outside of usto change in order for things on
the inside of us to change.
Now I think the belief that I'mready to let go of is it's okay
(16:53):
to have multiple days of notfeeling amazing.
I think I'm used to like havinga couple days of just feeling
like sad or down or maybefrustrated or just moving
through some things.
I need to feel right and Ithink the belief is like I can
(17:14):
still be the Lunden I want to bewith all of the feels, and
sometimes the feels that are notso pleasant can be present
longer, and that's okay.
So I'm trying to figure out howto word this in a way that
answers the question.
Not that I need to.
This is my podcast.
I can do it.
(17:35):
However, the fuck I want to doit.
But what is one belief I'm readyto let go of is like you have
to feel good most of the time inorder to like keep it moving.
You know, and it's just wildbecause I felt so much over the
(17:55):
last year like sad, anger, rage,frustration, happiness, love,
sorrow, just all the feels, andit's okay.
(18:15):
It's okay to feel all the feels.
Nothing has to be wrong If youfeel sad or upset or frustrated.
Nothing has to have happened.
It could just be that sadnessor anger and frustration feel
safe enough now to start to comeup.
And so, yeah, that's a belief Iwant to bring into my like all,
(18:39):
all emotions are beautiful.
All of them have a place andhave a purpose.
Um, you can, and maybe this iskind of the belief is like,
especially like over the lastfew months, I have been feeling
a lot of these things and thenI'm like how you know and and
(18:59):
messing up royally in a lot ofways with communication and
feelings and understanding myfeelings, and just being like
super fucking messy.
And I think the belief I had islike you can't be messy and be
a coach and have a podcast, likeif you're messy, you can't
(19:20):
share that mess, and I don'tthink I've ever said it that way
but, as I'm talking myselfthrough it, that's what it
really feels like is you can bemessy and that's the new belief
I want to bring into my nextyear is you can be messy and
have a really good and lovingrelationship.
You can be messy and be verysuccessful in business.
(19:45):
You can be messy and have apodcast and be a coach and help
others.
I can be messy and I can helpothers.
And I think the programming ofjust always trying to look a
certain way and my grandparentswere visiting with my mom a few
weekends ago and my grandpa isvery nitpicky to my grandma and
(20:11):
he was having her pick up acrumb of food that was on the
table and me and my mom werejust like, grandpa, give it a
rest.
And he's like, well, what if itfalls on her shirt?
And we were like, okay, it'sher shirt, and who cares if the
food falls on her shirt?
He's like, well, what willother people think if they see
that mark on her shirt?
(20:32):
And in that moment I lookedover at my mom and I was like
that sentence is embedded in thegenetic makeup.
That is so much.
It was a sentence and a momentand a snapshot that allowed me
(20:56):
to realize, oh yeah, you can bemessy, you can have a stain on
your shirt and it's all good.
But if the programming is, youhave to look a certain way and
be a certain way, or else whatother?
What will other people think?
That's a pretty deep root rootto uproot honey, and that's a
(21:16):
lot of what I've been, um,working through is like the fear
of what others might think,even though I didn't realize
that was it.
But you do a lot of this innerwork and you meditate and you do
NLP and you experiment withjust possibility and these
things start coming up andyou're like, oh yeah, maybe
(21:36):
there is a part of me that'safraid to share the mess.
And then there I was, sittingacross from my grandma and
grandpa, literally like a messon the table that was going to
hypothetically show up on hershirt that somebody that hasn't
even seen it yet is going tojudge her on.
It's just wild.
I love the unpacking ofancestral stuff and so that's
(22:00):
the belief is like I can bemessy and that's what I'm
bringing with me.
That's what I'm bringing withme.
Next question what is one areaof my life where I want to focus
more attention and energy as Istep into my 36th year, one area
(22:23):
of my life.
So I was talking with my friendKara this morning.
We talk every single day onaudio messages and we're very
real with each other.
She's very real with me.
I very much appreciate it, butshe's just like I feel like you
need to play more.
She's like I feel like you needto just go out and do something
(22:45):
that's not work or not aboutthe podcast, or just not about
anything other than just playing.
She's like, yeah, you go to thepark and you swing.
She's like, but what is reallygoing to feel like play and fun
for you?
And I was like, oh yeah.
(23:09):
So focusing more on play issomething I want to lean into
this year.
I feel like I play a lot too.
I hang out with kids a lot.
I play a lot.
I love doing arts and crafts.
I also really love to dance,and so I think in my 36th year,
(23:34):
play might look like moredancing.
My friend hosts a static dance.
I'm going to go to more ofthose next year.
I also, yeah, I want to find Iwill find like a dance studio, a
place that I can take danceclasses and just move in a group
and just learn choreography andkind of let go.
I think that will feel so goodand so fun.
But yeah, I don't.
I mean, like I said, I don'tand I feel like I've been
(23:58):
playing.
But this reflection from mybest friend of being like I feel
like you need to play more, I'mlike, okay, what does that look
like?
I'm not really sure, but I loveto dance, so I think it might
be more dancing and I think, too, a lot of my life and adventure
(24:23):
has been from going to newplaces.
Like, I'm still always going tolove to travel, I'm still going
to keep traveling, but I alsowant to travel and discover and
play right where I'm at.
I noticed that last week when Iwas just feeling a little bit
down, even yesterday, when Ijust broke down in my kitchen
(24:44):
and was just crying, I was like,oh, I wish I could just go
somewhere, pack my bags and goon an adventure.
But I'm like, yeah, Lunden,that's what you've always done.
You've traveled everywhere.
You've been to more countriesthan many people will ever be in
their lifetime, you know, andyou did like so many great
(25:05):
adventures.
Anyways, the feeling I want tocultivate more is more playing
and then more adventures withoutgoing anywhere.
I mean I can go places withinUtah, I can go wherever I want.
I just mean that need or desireto like go somewhere new, to
feel something new.
I kind of want to let go ofthat for sure.
So one area I want to focusmore attention and energy is in
(25:29):
play and fun, and also likewithin my inner space, right,
like just going places with youreyes closed or going on
adventures in your own backyard.
I don't need to be, even thoughI love to be, and I'm going to
keep doing it because I fuckinglove it.
I love being on airplanes, Ilove airports, I love the whole
process of traveling.
I love it, but I also want tomake sure that I'm not going
(25:55):
when I need to be being.
Like I said no planned answersto these questions here, so, as
I'm talking them out, I'm justlike processing as we go through
.
Um, let's see what is okay.
This will be the last one.
This is a good one.
Um, if I could ask my futureself for guidance about the year
(26:19):
ahead, what advice would theygive me and how can I integrate
that wisdom now?
If I could ask my future selffor guidance about the year
ahead.
I'm going to close my eyes andimagine myself on my timeline
(26:40):
now, and then I'm lookingforward at my future.
So what I'm getting is stoptrying to control everything.
Have fun, play more, beyourself more Be yourself.
(27:10):
It's okay to have moments thatdon't feel great, and you can
still be great.
What does the question say?
Okay, guidance for the yearahead you can do things on your
own.
You don't need someone else tofix you or put you back together
.
You are whole, even with yourbroken pieces.
(27:31):
Keep going, wake up, do all thethings that you know help you
(27:53):
feel good, like exercise andmeditation and eating well and
eating with the desire tonourish, which is something I
feel like I've just.
I'm so proud of myself forovercoming the need to eat a
certain way, to look a certainway, like over the past I would
say like four or five years Ijust really feel like the
(28:14):
nourishment from food outside of, like what I'm going to look
like, which feels so great.
Um, guidance from my future selfis just to keep.
Keep doing the things that Iknow.
Move the needle.
Um, probably say no to morethings or let go of certain
things.
Um, I've always felt a bigdesire to have this podcast, so
(28:46):
I know for certain that that'snever something I'm going to say
no to.
But I think there are otherthings that I get to say no to
and let go of in order to makemore space for this podcast and
more space for expression ofmyself and others, to use my
voice, to let others use theirvoice as well.
(29:12):
Do more things that scare you.
What other guidance is futureme giving me?
Be more present with the peoplethat you love.
Stay sober.
I've been really sober over thelast year, which is cool, so I
(29:40):
think that's the right path.
I know that's the right path.
I know that's the right pathand keep smiling.
That's what my future self gaveme.
And how can I integrate thatwisdom now?
Yeah, I think just saying itout loud helps me integrate it.
(30:07):
I don't think I sat in that waythat I did just now of like
visualizing where I'm at and myfuture self on my timeline and
then asking for that wisdom.
That was really cool.
I enjoyed that, and I think Ijust want to end with saying
thank you for listening and forbeing a part of Self Love and
(30:28):
Sweat the podcast.
Maybe you've listened to thispodcast since we started, which
was very different than how.
It is now A lot more likefitness, physical health, which
I talk about here too as wellsometimes, but it was very much
more like, yeah, fitness, healthand nutrition focused, and now
I just feel like this has becomea space for me to share and
(30:51):
express for others and forothers to be impacted.
I love getting messages fromlisteners about how it's helped
them change their perspective,change their heart posture, have
a realization or a learning.
Sometimes it's not even likewhat is said on a podcast, but
(31:15):
it's like you sitting down,choosing the topic, listening
coming as you are, and thenhearing something that ignites
something else in you, and thenyou kind of figure out a new
solution or a new path on yourown, and I think that's kind of
the power of expressing ourvoice and sharing and being
(31:38):
unapologetic in sharing the messas well.
I think that's what's reallycool about this podcast.
So thank you for being here andfor listening and for tapping
in and for hearing what I haveto say about what I think I know
in 36 years, which is crazy.
Yeah, I love you.
(32:01):
That's all for today.
See you at the next episode.
Thank you so much for listeningto this episode of Self Love
and Sweat the Podcast.
If you enjoyed this episode orwere inspired by it or something
resonated with you, do me afavor and share this episode
(32:22):
with a friend, someone that youthink might enjoy this episode
as well.
That's the ultimate complimentand the best way to make this
podcast ripple out into theworld of others, and also you
can leave us a review up to fivestars wherever you're listening
to the podcast.
Thank you so much for listeningand we'll see you at the next
(32:44):
episode.
I appreciate you.
Welcome to Self Love and Sweat the podcast, the
place where you'll get inspiredto live your life
unapologetically, embrace yourperfect imperfections and do
what sets your soul on fire.
I'm your host, Lunden Souza.
Hey, before we jump into thisepisode, I just want to make
(00:27):
sure that you get all the freethings possible, if you haven't
already.
You need to get your self-loveand sweat free monthly life
coaching calendar.
Honestly, the way to experiencedeep change in your life is by
doing small little things overtime, and so that's what you'll
(00:48):
find in this free calendar.
You can get it by going tolifelikelunden.
com/calendar.
Get yours for free and let'sget into today's episode.
Happy today and welcome back tothe podcast.
I turned 36 last month, which isso wild.
(01:12):
Sometimes I don't know if youguys are the same, but sometimes
I'll think about age and itjust like really trips me out.
Like I remember when my momturned 33.
I don't remember likespecifically what we did.
I don't remember like, yeah, Idon't know her birthday party or
what we did to celebrate.
I just remember my mom turning33.
(01:36):
And you know, we have theseembedded ideas or beliefs
embedded ideas or beliefs insociety that like, oh, this age
means this and by this age youshould be here and at this age
(02:00):
you should be making this muchmoney or be married and have
kids or just whatever.
And I think one thing that I amreally proud of it hasn't
always been easy, definitely noteasy.
For sure, not Even now itdoesn't feel super easy.
But one thing I'm really proudof myself is I've always kind of
(02:22):
written my own story, my ownversion of life.
That's really what Life LikeLunden is.
That's what my social mediachannels are Life Like Lunden.
And it's not like, hey, comeover here and do exactly what
I'm doing and live my same life.
That's not what it's about.
It's like the world is going totell you what it thinks you
(02:52):
should do or what you'resupposed to do.
But what is life like?
Insert your name.
What do you want to do?
What do you want to get out oflife?
What experiences do you want tohave?
What do you want to learn?
What does your growth path looklike?
And so, even though there havebeen a lot of highs and lows
(03:16):
with choosing to write my ownbook, let's say I'm really proud
of that, say I'm really proudof that and yeah.
So anyways, I wanted to sharereflections from my 36 years of
life.
And I've done like episodesbefore where I'm like 20 things
(03:37):
I learned in my 20s or I thoughtabout like 36 things I learned
at 36.
And then I was like, oh, whydon't we just ask chat GPT for
some questions for reflection?
And that's what I did.
So I asked chat GPT.
I was like, can you give mequestions to reflect on my 36th
birthday?
(03:58):
And then chat GPT wrote backand was like happy 36th birthday
.
Here are five reflectivequestions to help you celebrate,
gain insight and set intentionsfor the future.
So that's what we're going todo today.
We're going to go through allof these questions.
And then I asked for some moretoo.
So I just kind of copy andpasted some of my favorite ones.
(04:19):
But it doesn't have to be yourbirthday to use these questions
for reflection.
I think these are all reallypowerful questions.
Sometimes we can get caught upin watching a series on TV or
mindlessly scrolling.
So, honestly, I use ChatGPToften to give me questions to
(04:41):
just like journal about orreflect on or just get my brain
out of.
Yeah, just like scrolling,watching mindless stuff,
whatever.
So I love ChatGPT for manyreasons, but these questions are
straight from ChatGPT.
(05:02):
So what number one.
And this is kind of coolbecause we're at the end of the
year as well, so you can kind ofreflect on this last year, even
if it's not your birthday.
It doesn't have to be birthdayreflection questions or anything
.
But the first one is what am Imost proud of accomplishing in
the past year and why does itmatter to me the past year?
(05:29):
And why does it matter to me,what am I most proud of
accomplishing in this past year,in the past year, and why does
it matter to me?
I think what I'm most proud ofaccomplishing the last year is
this rebuild of my life andmoving to Utah Last July so it's
December now, but last July Icame to Utah for a month to hike
(05:50):
, or that was what I thought,and then I fell in love with it.
I did this most amazing hikecalled Bell's Canyon to Lower
Falls.
It's in the CottonwoodMountains and it is phenomenal.
And I did that hike and I waslike, oh, I'm not going anywhere
, I am staying here and I loveit and I'm very proud of that
(06:12):
decision and accomplishing allthat I have in this rebuild
right.
It's like moving somewhere new,establishing like where you're
going to live and what yourday-to-day looks like.
Even just finding my new gymand yoga studio and community.
(06:34):
I just finally I was thinkingabout this I'm like I don't
think I've ever lived somewherewhere I really knew my neighbors
, think I've ever livedsomewhere where I really knew my
neighbors, and so I'vedeveloped great relationships
with my neighbors and myneighborhood, created and
stepped into differentcommunities and, yeah, I met a
(06:55):
lot of really, really reallycool people.
In fact, elisa Marie was justover and we recorded a podcast
which actually I criedafterwards, I pressed stop
recording and then I just satthere with her and just tears
came down my eyes.
She's amazing.
She's someone I've met here inUtah whose story just continues.
Learning more and more abouther continues to just feed my
(07:18):
soul.
She's so incredible, but I mether.
I've met so many amazing peoplein Utah and so I think my
biggest accomplishment is just,yeah, what I'm most proud of
accomplishing is stepping out,moving somewhere new.
For no reason other than it waswhat I chose, because, when I
(07:45):
think about when I left myparents' house at 17, I moved to
Long Beach State to go tocollege.
I moved to Austria to work fora company called Runtastic and
at the time I was dating Joe andhe lived there too and worked
for Runtastic.
So I moved there for love andfor business or for work.
(08:05):
And then I moved back toAmerica because it was COVID and
that was really the only option.
I mean, I guess I could havestayed there while everything
was shut down, but I didn't wantto do that.
So I moved back and then when Ichose Utah, I was like, oh, I
could choose anywhere, I couldchoose anything.
And so I read this book that Ilove.
(08:26):
I read it a lot.
It's called Shadow Work byDanielle Massey, and by getting
deep down into our shadows andinto the dark parts of us and
clearing things out of oursubconscious, letting things
come up and metabolize, reallyhelped me understand how to and
(08:51):
the power of manifestation.
And so I went through thatwhole chapter of the book on how
to manifest truly and made alist of all the things I wanted
to experience and how it feltand tasted and smelled and just
everything.
And now I'm living thatmanifestation.
(09:13):
I remember sitting down with myjournal and just writing down
all the things I wanted toexperience, praying about it,
meditating on it, being nervousbut also excited about this to
reveal itself to me.
Anyways, it was just a veryinteresting process to choose to
move somewhere, all based on mychoice.
(09:33):
So I'm very proud of that andaccomplishing it.
And I remember there's justyeah, there's.
Things are hard when you're.
There are hard moments alwaysright, like no matter what,
there's going to be highs andlows and ups and downs.
And one thing that my mom saidto me which really inspired me,
I think, or just reminded me ofmy greatness.
(09:57):
You know, it's really easyMyself too.
It's like we get kind of caughtup in the like the yeah, in the
not so great parts, and I likedoing both.
I like looking at the not sogreat and the great, but
sometimes it's hard to see thegreatness within ourselves.
We're in a funk or a stuck spotor whatever.
(10:18):
And she was like I feel so proudof you.
She's like all the thingsyou're doing I did with your dad
.
We had two incomes comingtogether and it wasn't just me,
it was me and him.
And you're doing a lot of thisstuff by yourself.
You should be really proud ofyourself.
And I was like oh yeah, thanks,mom, I appreciate it.
Not that there's anything wrongwith combining forces and
(10:41):
creating a partnership andcombining income.
There's nothing wrong with thatat all.
But there were moments where Ijust felt a little bit
frustrated and not good enough.
And then when she said that, Iwas like, oh yeah, but you're
Lunden, party of one, and you'retaking care of yourself and
you're building businesses andyou're doing all of this, give
(11:02):
yourself a little bit of credit.
So when my mom said that thatwas really empowering and the
second part of this questionsays and why does it matter to
me?
I think it matters to me,especially now, because to
process and feel and heal ittakes a level of safety.
(11:25):
Your body has to feel.
Your body, your heart, yourspirit, your mind has to feel
safe in order to release anystuck emotions, trapped, traumas
, just anything that's holdingyou back.
I feel like over the last yearhas probably been the most
stable I've ever been.
(11:45):
Like I have oh my gosh, like mydream apartment.
I'm obsessed, like I can't I gooutside and I go for walks and
I'm like this is where I live,like this is wild, like it's
gorgeous.
There's not a rock out of place, there's a lake.
I can stand up paddleboard onmy like, I have easy access to
(12:08):
go, hike and explore pretty muchwherever I want, like there's
so much beauty in what I seewith my eyes opened and I, um,
yeah, I feel so grateful forthat right.
And also this has been a yearof so much coming up for me.
(12:33):
Yesterday I was on the floor inmy kitchen just sobbing and
wailing and just getting justlike getting out feelings that
are time to get out right, and Ithink I haven't been in a space
in a long time where I've beenable to slow down enough and
(12:54):
then feel safe enough to expressand then to have relationships
in my life of people that I'vemet, where I can express those
things safely and have it beokay to not feel okay and have
it be, you know, beautiful thatI want to.
You know, express and cry andfeel.
(13:15):
Um, it doesn't have to bejoyful and positive and happy
and amazing all the time.
Now that doesn't mean that I'mnot going to choose gratitude or
choose the next good, mostempowering thought.
(13:36):
There are going to be momentswhere things are messy, and so
that's the long answer to thatquestion is I'm proud of this
move over the last year and ofthe community I've created
within myself, like to me, fromme and then also the community
(13:57):
that I've built or connectedwith since being here.
And it matters to me because Ifinally feel like I'm in a safe
enough spot to feel and processand navigate and, yeah, just
feel deeply right, like I canfeel such joy and such bliss and
(14:20):
such inspiration and love.
And I can also feel like deepsorrow, sadness, despair, and
it's like sometimes there's noteven anything I don't know
particularly bad that'shappening.
It's just like the flow of thatfeminine energy.
It's like sometimes things comeup and I'm like I just need to
(14:42):
like cry and scream and I can dothat and I have the space to do
that.
And so that's the answer tothat question for me.
What other questions here?
What is one belief I'm ready tolet go of as I step into this
(15:13):
new chapter and what empoweringbelief can I replace it?
By the way, I didn't prepareany answers to any of these
questions, so as I'm readingthem, I kind of copied and
pasted some.
I'm like thinking of it as wego One belief I'm ready to let
go of as I step into thischapter and what empowering
belief can replace it?
(15:34):
I think the belief is like.
The belief is about, like Ithink in a lot of areas of my
(15:59):
life, I do a really good job ofnot waiting for the experience
on the outside to dictate howI'm feeling on the inside.
Right, Like feeling gratitudeahead of the experience, feeling
(16:22):
love and joy and peace, evenwhen things don't feel that way,
like I don't.
I definitely have a beautifulbelief that I love that we can't
wait for things outside of usto change in order for things on
the inside of us to change.
Now I think the belief that I'mready to let go of is it's okay
(16:53):
to have multiple days of notfeeling amazing.
I think I'm used to like havinga couple days of just feeling
like sad or down or maybefrustrated or just moving
through some things.
I need to feel right and Ithink the belief is like I can
(17:14):
still be the Lunden I want to bewith all of the feels, and
sometimes the feels that are notso pleasant can be present
longer, and that's okay.
So I'm trying to figure out howto word this in a way that
answers the question.
Not that I need to.
This is my podcast.
I can do it.
(17:35):
However, the fuck I want to doit.
But what is one belief I'm readyto let go of is like you have
to feel good most of the time inorder to like keep it moving.
You know, and it's just wildbecause I felt so much over the
(17:55):
last year like sad, anger, rage,frustration, happiness, love,
sorrow, just all the feels, andit's okay.
(18:15):
It's okay to feel all the feels.
Nothing has to be wrong If youfeel sad or upset or frustrated.
Nothing has to have happened.
It could just be that sadnessor anger and frustration feel
safe enough now to start to comeup.
And so, yeah, that's a belief Iwant to bring into my like all,
(18:39):
all emotions are beautiful.
All of them have a place andhave a purpose.
Um, you can, and maybe this iskind of the belief is like,
especially like over the lastfew months, I have been feeling
a lot of these things and thenI'm like how you know and and
(18:59):
messing up royally in a lot ofways with communication and
feelings and understanding myfeelings, and just being like
super fucking messy.
And I think the belief I had islike you can't be messy and be
a coach and have a podcast, likeif you're messy, you can't
(19:20):
share that mess, and I don'tthink I've ever said it that way
but, as I'm talking myselfthrough it, that's what it
really feels like is you can bemessy and that's the new belief
I want to bring into my nextyear is you can be messy and
have a really good and lovingrelationship.
You can be messy and be verysuccessful in business.
(19:45):
You can be messy and have apodcast and be a coach and help
others.
I can be messy and I can helpothers.
And I think the programming ofjust always trying to look a
certain way and my grandparentswere visiting with my mom a few
weekends ago and my grandpa isvery nitpicky to my grandma and
(20:11):
he was having her pick up acrumb of food that was on the
table and me and my mom werejust like, grandpa, give it a
rest.
And he's like, well, what if itfalls on her shirt?
And we were like, okay, it'sher shirt, and who cares if the
food falls on her shirt?
He's like, well, what willother people think if they see
that mark on her shirt?
(20:32):
And in that moment I lookedover at my mom and I was like
that sentence is embedded in thegenetic makeup.
That is so much.
It was a sentence and a momentand a snapshot that allowed me
(20:56):
to realize, oh yeah, you can bemessy, you can have a stain on
your shirt and it's all good.
But if the programming is, youhave to look a certain way and
be a certain way, or else whatother?
What will other people think?
That's a pretty deep root rootto uproot honey, and that's a
(21:16):
lot of what I've been, um,working through is like the fear
of what others might think,even though I didn't realize
that was it.
But you do a lot of this innerwork and you meditate and you do
NLP and you experiment withjust possibility and these
things start coming up andyou're like, oh yeah, maybe
(21:36):
there is a part of me that'safraid to share the mess.
And then there I was, sittingacross from my grandma and
grandpa, literally like a messon the table that was going to
hypothetically show up on hershirt that somebody that hasn't
even seen it yet is going tojudge her on.
It's just wild.
I love the unpacking ofancestral stuff and so that's
(22:00):
the belief is like I can bemessy and that's what I'm
bringing with me.
That's what I'm bringing withme.
Next question what is one areaof my life where I want to focus
more attention and energy as Istep into my 36th year, one area
(22:23):
of my life.
So I was talking with my friendKara this morning.
We talk every single day onaudio messages and we're very
real with each other.
She's very real with me.
I very much appreciate it, butshe's just like I feel like you
need to play more.
She's like I feel like you needto just go out and do something
(22:45):
that's not work or not aboutthe podcast, or just not about
anything other than just playing.
She's like, yeah, you go to thepark and you swing.
She's like, but what is reallygoing to feel like play and fun
for you?
And I was like, oh yeah.
(23:09):
So focusing more on play issomething I want to lean into
this year.
I feel like I play a lot too.
I hang out with kids a lot.
I play a lot.
I love doing arts and crafts.
I also really love to dance,and so I think in my 36th year,
(23:34):
play might look like moredancing.
My friend hosts a static dance.
I'm going to go to more ofthose next year.
I also, yeah, I want to find Iwill find like a dance studio, a
place that I can take danceclasses and just move in a group
and just learn choreography andkind of let go.
I think that will feel so goodand so fun.
But yeah, I don't.
I mean, like I said, I don'tand I feel like I've been
(23:58):
playing.
But this reflection from mybest friend of being like I feel
like you need to play more, I'mlike, okay, what does that look
like?
I'm not really sure, but I loveto dance, so I think it might
be more dancing and I think, too, a lot of my life and adventure
(24:23):
has been from going to newplaces.
Like, I'm still always going tolove to travel, I'm still going
to keep traveling, but I alsowant to travel and discover and
play right where I'm at.
I noticed that last week when Iwas just feeling a little bit
down, even yesterday, when Ijust broke down in my kitchen
(24:44):
and was just crying, I was like,oh, I wish I could just go
somewhere, pack my bags and goon an adventure.
But I'm like, yeah, Lunden,that's what you've always done.
You've traveled everywhere.
You've been to more countriesthan many people will ever be in
their lifetime, you know, andyou did like so many great
(25:05):
adventures.
Anyways, the feeling I want tocultivate more is more playing
and then more adventures withoutgoing anywhere.
I mean I can go places withinUtah, I can go wherever I want.
I just mean that need or desireto like go somewhere new, to
feel something new.
I kind of want to let go ofthat for sure.
So one area I want to focusmore attention and energy is in
(25:29):
play and fun, and also likewithin my inner space, right,
like just going places with youreyes closed or going on
adventures in your own backyard.
I don't need to be, even thoughI love to be, and I'm going to
keep doing it because I fuckinglove it.
I love being on airplanes, Ilove airports, I love the whole
process of traveling.
I love it, but I also want tomake sure that I'm not going
(25:55):
when I need to be being.
Like I said no planned answersto these questions here, so, as
I'm talking them out, I'm justlike processing as we go through
.
Um, let's see what is okay.
This will be the last one.
This is a good one.
Um, if I could ask my futureself for guidance about the year
(26:19):
ahead, what advice would theygive me and how can I integrate
that wisdom now?
If I could ask my future selffor guidance about the year
ahead.
I'm going to close my eyes andimagine myself on my timeline
(26:40):
now, and then I'm lookingforward at my future.
So what I'm getting is stoptrying to control everything.
Have fun, play more, beyourself more Be yourself.
(27:10):
It's okay to have moments thatdon't feel great, and you can
still be great.
What does the question say?
Okay, guidance for the yearahead you can do things on your
own.
You don't need someone else tofix you or put you back together
.
You are whole, even with yourbroken pieces.
(27:31):
Keep going, wake up, do all thethings that you know help you
(27:53):
feel good, like exercise andmeditation and eating well and
eating with the desire tonourish, which is something I
feel like I've just.
I'm so proud of myself forovercoming the need to eat a
certain way, to look a certainway, like over the past I would
say like four or five years Ijust really feel like the
(28:14):
nourishment from food outside of, like what I'm going to look
like, which feels so great.
Um, guidance from my future selfis just to keep.
Keep doing the things that Iknow.
Move the needle.
Um, probably say no to morethings or let go of certain
things.
Um, I've always felt a bigdesire to have this podcast, so
(28:46):
I know for certain that that'snever something I'm going to say
no to.
But I think there are otherthings that I get to say no to
and let go of in order to makemore space for this podcast and
more space for expression ofmyself and others, to use my
voice, to let others use theirvoice as well.
(29:12):
Do more things that scare you.
What other guidance is futureme giving me?
Be more present with the peoplethat you love.
Stay sober.
I've been really sober over thelast year, which is cool, so I
(29:40):
think that's the right path.
I know that's the right path.
I know that's the right pathand keep smiling.
That's what my future self gaveme.
And how can I integrate thatwisdom now?
Yeah, I think just saying itout loud helps me integrate it.
(30:07):
I don't think I sat in that waythat I did just now of like
visualizing where I'm at and myfuture self on my timeline and
then asking for that wisdom.
That was really cool.
I enjoyed that, and I think Ijust want to end with saying
thank you for listening and forbeing a part of Self Love and
(30:28):
Sweat the podcast.
Maybe you've listened to thispodcast since we started, which
was very different than how.
It is now A lot more likefitness, physical health, which
I talk about here too as wellsometimes, but it was very much
more like, yeah, fitness, healthand nutrition focused, and now
I just feel like this has becomea space for me to share and
(30:51):
express for others and forothers to be impacted.
I love getting messages fromlisteners about how it's helped
them change their perspective,change their heart posture, have
a realization or a learning.
Sometimes it's not even likewhat is said on a podcast, but
(31:15):
it's like you sitting down,choosing the topic, listening
coming as you are, and thenhearing something that ignites
something else in you, and thenyou kind of figure out a new
solution or a new path on yourown, and I think that's kind of
the power of expressing ourvoice and sharing and being
(31:38):
unapologetic in sharing the messas well.
I think that's what's reallycool about this podcast.
So thank you for being here andfor listening and for tapping
in and for hearing what I haveto say about what I think I know
in 36 years, which is crazy.
Yeah, I love you.
(32:01):
That's all for today.
See you at the next episode.
Thank you so much for listeningto this episode of Self Love
and Sweat the Podcast.
If you enjoyed this episode orwere inspired by it or something
resonated with you, do me afavor and share this episode
(32:22):
with a friend, someone that youthink might enjoy this episode
as well.
That's the ultimate complimentand the best way to make this
podcast ripple out into theworld of others, and also you
can leave us a review up to fivestars wherever you're listening
to the podcast.
Thank you so much for listeningand we'll see you at the next
(32:44):
episode.
I appreciate you.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!