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June 12, 2023 • 19 mins

So I Said Pod is back with another thought-provoking episode! Join Dylan Sellers and Alyissa Sagoes as they delve into their unique experiences with spirituality, discussing the impact of cultural images of God and the absence of a specific gendered concept. They explore the rise of mega-churches, the power of feminine energy, and the complex nature of God's identity. Get ready for a captivating conversation that challenges conventional beliefs.

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Episode Transcript

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Dylan Sellers (00:00):
So I said we back and I'm continuing in this

(00:03):
series with my girl Alyissajacket on. Yeah, cuz we got a
little chilly. Yeah, literally alittle chilly. And that's okay.
That's okay. So like the reasonthat like, I think that you that
we decided to do this kind oflike series together is because
you asked really good questions.
It always makes me think canlike be on my toes. And so like,

(00:25):
I'm I'm gonna let you carry thisconversation like I don't
really? I don't really have athought yet, but I'm sure you
are going to provoke one becauseyou're good at that.

Alyissa Sagoes (00:37):
Yeah, I do that naturally. Thank you for seeing
me. First of all, yeah, they'resecond off. Um, yeah, I kind of
wanted to touch back on ourprevious conversation that was X
number of days ago, because myconcept of time is also skewed.
Yeah, um,what else? Oh, okay, cool.

(01:04):
We were talking about God, andthe image that we were given of
God, yeah, the persona that wewere given of God as a child,
and how that carried into ourbeliefs, our worship and how it
translates now, because for me,I've and I've told you this

(01:26):
before, I was told Jesus and Godwere white men. Image, yeah, the
image was a Caucasian man. And Icould never connect to it. And
that heavily affected my prayerand how I spoke to this higher

(01:47):
being, because I didn't feel assupported as I was told, I
should feel. And then you saidthat you actually weren't given
an image worship and I thoughtthat was cool. So can you tell
the people

Dylan Sellers (02:02):
start there? So that's a that's an interesting
thing. Because like, I Iremember, as far back as I can
remember, I remember being abeliever, right? Like, there are
photos and like video of me likedoing announcements, giving

(02:24):
speeches, like five Yeah, likefive, like five year old Dylan
in like, bobblehead dylan andlike, my face looks exactly the
same. My head is probably thesame size. My body is just like,
tiny.

Unknown (02:35):
So okay, so before you can see you, at some point, can
we drop in like a photo?

Dylan Sellers (02:42):
I'm gonna need you to find cash, I'm gonna have
to find a photo, I'm sure I'msure my mother has a photo that
like is embarrassing enough toget some traction.

Alyissa Sagoes (02:54):
Because now you have to do it. Expect

Dylan Sellers (02:57):
to see it? Yeah, they're gonna expect this. So
like, God wasn't a wasn't aphysical concept for me. Right?
And so you know how like thething about like, you know,
grandma's having like thispicture of like, white Jesus,
and maybe JFK. Right, like, onthe wall next to each other.

(03:17):
White Jesus said, Martin LutherKing, you know, it was that that
wasn't my life, you know that.
And, like, for context, itprobably should have been,
right? Because like the women,my grandmother's in my life are
actually like, my greatgrandmother's, right. So they
were a part of that generationwho would have had those things?

(03:39):
Yeah. But didn't.

Alyissa Sagoes (03:43):
Why did they ever What's your?

Dylan Sellers (03:45):
I don't know. I never asked What's your theory?
Listen, you know, I got theoriesabout my family. Right, pick
one. I got theories I got thatmakes the most sense. I think
it's because like, my family islike blackity Black. Yeah, they
are. Right. So like, my greatgrandmother, grandma, Charlotte

(04:05):
was daughter of an elk. Right?
Like they were in the elk. Solike the Elks is a big deal on
that part of our family. Andlike that's blackity Black. You
don't I'm saying like it'sblackity Black. And so like, you
know, image of white Jesuswasn't a thing, right? Like it
wasn't the thing that they werethat they was flying with. You

(04:25):
don't I'm saying? So like, andlike the churches that I grew up
in? I don't know. Like I wastaught that God was spirit.
Right. And so like that, itwasn't it wasn't actually a good
idea to have an image. Right?
It's what I was taught and solike when you were saying like,

(04:47):
what do you see when you pray?
Yeah. It sounds weird to saynothing but like, I wish I had
that. nothing good to say likeit's not a there isn't an image
that comes to mind. Yeah. Andafter reflecting on your
question, like I thought about,like, in college, I tried to
conjure an image, but it waslike, it was comical. So it

(05:09):
didn't work for me. Right? Like,I was thinking like flowy, like,
down almost like you would thinkI was trying, you know what I'm
saying? Because, like, I wastrying to connect with God
differently when I was incollege, right. And it just, it
didn't work for me. And so, youknow, I went on exploring and

(05:35):
kind of left that part out. Butlike, as far as like, a, like, I
wasn't taught to, like, have animage. And so, and then, like,
when I was like, 15, I ended upa mega church. So like, major
mega church culture, moved awayfrom any images or iconography

(05:58):
at all, really. And so like, youwere hard pressed to find a
cross. You know what I'm saying?
So like, even like it was achurch, no mistaking that there
was a church. But it wasdifficult to find a cross
anywhere really. Like you didn'tsee images of crosses until like

(06:23):
resurrection weekend or HolyWeek. You don't I'm saying it
wasn't a thing that was like,there wasn't one hanging behind
the pastor while he waspreaching. Or you have said
like, they weren't in like theSunday school classes. So I
could not graffiti has neverreally been a part of like, how
I understood the faith in thatway.

Alyissa Sagoes (06:41):
Okay. First of all, I am jealous of your
experience, because I feel likeyou felt a more like, all around
support. Yeah, versus like,maybe in my experience, where I
was like, I don't know that why,man.

Dylan Sellers (07:02):
I can't, I can't get jiggy with this.

Alyissa Sagoes (07:05):
Like, I'm praying for this. I,

Dylan Sellers (07:08):
I don't know that I would have until this moment
that I would have articulated myfaith experience that way.
Right? That it was supported.
But it was like, I can't, Ican't deny that. Like I had tons
of support of faith. Now. I got,there's some there's some
downsides to that as well.

(07:30):
Right? And so like, when you'rein college, when you're young,
it's almost like they're tryingto turn you into a zealot. You
don't I'm saying like, you're,they're trying to turn you into
like this. In an effort to getyou to be on fire for Christ,

(07:52):
right, which is a good thing. Inan effort to do that they make
you intolerant of others.

Alyissa Sagoes (07:59):
And that's what just never vibrate with me.
Yeah. So okay, so I thoughtabout something as you were
speaking about how the megachurches didn't give you an icon
to

Dylan Sellers (08:16):
look to? Well, you know, you have to remember
that like, and you don't have toremember but like, understand,
right, like, remember this,because you may not remember
this, but like, the rise of megachurch was also the rise of
local churches. Okay, I don'tknow that. So like, churches
ditch the cross for a logo. Andchurches started to be branded.

(08:42):
Right? Yeah. And so like, nowyou have churches that are like,
you know, them by their brand.
And they have a logo and like,sometimes that logo includes a
cross, sometimes it doesn't.
Okay, right. They were going forlike the, the Nike check kind of

(09:02):
thing, like the iconic thingsthat if you see this, you're
thinking of not really like thekingdom of God. But you're
thinking of my church. Yeah.
Right. And so it was an effortto try to get people to come to
church, you know what I'msaying? So it became big
business. It's not like that.
There was iconography, but itwas very specific to the church.

(09:23):
Yeah, in particular. So you sawlike, the logo was everywhere.
Right? So like, you knew whatthe logo was?

Alyissa Sagoes (09:30):
Yeah. And I feel like that impacts a person who's
like still trying to navigatetheir spiritual journey, because
if I don't necessarily like thevibes of that church, I'm going
to associate that as my worship,especially when I'm young. Yeah,
you know, but what I wanted toask though, was your family did

(09:52):
not make this set image of thismirror person. Something for you
to look to and say this is God.
But I assume they associatedGod's energy with masculine
energy. Like, oh, yeah, what isyour? So Explain that. Explain

(10:13):
that. I've heard a lot of sidesthat say, you know, what the
Lord and company encompasses?
Could be that a feminine, itfosters it grows it, it births
it, rebirth it. Yeah. So what iswhat would you say to that?

Dylan Sellers (10:37):
What would I say to that? I have lots of thoughts
around if it's not a man. Yeah.
So like, what is it? What youwere taught? Was that God is
God. Right? Right. That God isneither male nor female. But
then in practice, you alwaysheard like, Father God, and he,

(10:57):
and he, yeah, because inScripture, it seems right.
Right, like so. In followingscripture, there's there is the
masculine pronoun that isassociated with God, right? And
so, the feminine is associatedwith different aspects of God.

(11:19):
Right? And so like, wisdom, isgiven a feminine pronoun in
Scripture, right? And so like,those kinds of things are like
given given a feminine pronoun,but it wasn't until later that I
understood the the multifacetedpneus of God, when it became

(11:41):
when it comes to energies. Doesthat make sense? So as I'm
growing up, I grew up in a very,like, the church was very
patriarchal. Yeah, right. Thechurch is very patriarchal. The
one that I grew up in, however,like, my personal life is very
matriarchal. Yeah. Right. And solike, the women in my life

(12:03):
really ran my life. Right? Andit wasn't like, it wasn't one of
those things where it's like,you know, by happenstance, no,
no, it was very explicit. Like,my grandmother is the matriarch
of my family, and everyoneunderstands that, like, my
grandfather understands that youdon't understand that it was
very much. So this dominantfemale energy that I grew up in

(12:25):
and grew accustomed to. And somy association with God was more
feminine than masculine. Itwasn't until recently, that I
even accepted any of like, themasculine things that came along
with God. As something that Icould trust. Yeah. Does that
make sense? Yeah. Because like,I mean, I didn't meet my father

(12:48):
until I was 15. Right? So likethis affected, how have you got,
and like men in my life ingeneral, because I always saw
men as transient. And soconnecting with God and a father
figure kind of way. wasn't,wasn't something that I can hold
on to. Right. And so it's verymuch so feminine, but like, and

(13:09):
this is where like, I havethoughts that come in, right.
And so like, as I get older, andI start studying, studying
scripture, and I start hearingthings like Paul talking about
giving birth to people or givingbirth to things, this annoys me,
right? Because I listen, Paul isan important person in

(13:33):
Scripture, right? But Paul is mybrother, right? He is my much
older brother, he is wise. He iswritten a bunch of beautiful
things that has helped me withmy faith, let's put that out
there. But there are things thatI disagree with how he
contextualize it, right? Becausegiving birth is a very specific

(13:55):
thing that is feminine. Like, nomatter what I do, I cannot give
birth or even understand what itfeels like, you know what I'm
saying? Like, a body is not madeup for that. And so it's almost
like it's almost offensive to belike, I'm giving birth to this

(14:18):
thing, because then you'retaking away from the feminine.
Right, and trying to hold it allin the masculine.

Alyissa Sagoes (14:29):
And I think that is a big aspect of the
disconnect. Like, I would agreewith that. And when are my
thoughts as a little young andwhen I would think about it even
read, you know, Scriptureswhere, you know, it's talking

(14:50):
about, you know, masculinefigures sprouting this thing out
of thin air and this this andthat, like, you know, I always
felt like there was not enoughcredit give into the feminine
energy. And so I was interestedin knowing where, where it kind
of flowed within your beliefs?
Because yeah,

Dylan Sellers (15:08):
so let me give you an you know, because we can
wrap here because we're gonna betalking about that right? So let
me let me kind of give you my myfinal, not my final thought. But
the thought that I'm going toleave with, right with this.
What we have to remember aboutGod is that God is neither
masculine nor feminine, but hascreated both, right. And so

(15:33):
because God created both, whenwe look at the creation story in
Genesis, he created themasculine Adam, to do a thing,
right, but saw that he couldn'tdo this thing well alone. So he
created feminine energy in theembodiment of what would later

(15:54):
be known as Eve. But Eve wasbirthed in like this help. And I
was just, I was just taught thisby like, shout out to Fanny,
who's a fantastic teacher, whotaught us on Wednesday about
this feminine energy that wasthat existed, and not as lower

(16:16):
than in help. But as like theneed of if I don't have this,
then nothing else gets done.
Right. And so God creates thisenergy and gives that energy,
the ability to create andmultiply, right? And so like,
masculine energy can only workwith what I see. feminine energy
allows me to create that which Ican't. Does that make sense? And

(16:40):
so like, God saw fit to giveboth into different ways, and
then like, make sure that theyworked together. And so like, it
is dangerous to trap God intoone or the other. Yeah. Right.
Like it is, it is equally wrongto call God a man, as it is to
call God a woman. Right? Or tocall God masculine as it is to

(17:05):
call God feminine. God is Godand has created those things and
anything in between. That makessense. Yep.

Alyissa Sagoes (17:17):
Yep. I agree with all of that. I agree with
all that, and I think just addvery quickly. Yeah, there is no
one without the other. Yeah, weneed both. And I think where it
went left throughout history andyou know, in throughout, you

(17:38):
know, the utilization ofreligion to control cities and
stuff like that is humans. Yeah.
came in and they want to powercontrol. Yeah. So yeah, just
about unlearning that andprioritizing the both the need
for both. You need

Dylan Sellers (17:58):
both masculine and feminine energy. And
understand that all comes fromGod. And so yeah, yeah, I think
that's all I have to say onthat. Yeah. So yeah, we're out.
So good.
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