Lily Mae Clements dazzles in this unforgettable episode that showcases her remarkable talent for spinning tall tales into gold. When Valene's irrepressible mother meets Jackson Mobley at a retirement home, it's a match made in con-artist heaven. These kindred spirits recognize the hustler in each other immediately, bonding over their shared gift for fabrication and spinning yarns that grow taller by the minute.<br><br>Their whirlwind romance leads to an impromptu Vegas elopement funded by $200 stolen from Kenny and Ginger's emergency fund. But when their mutual deceptions are revealed – she's not wealthy and he's never managed Patsy Cline – they don't fall apart. Instead, they join forces, with Jackson convincing a Vegas lounge owner that Lily Mae is terminally ill, securing her long-dreamed-of singing opportunity at the Sidewinder Lounge.<br><br>Meanwhile, young Olivia faces ridicule when classmates taunt her about her father potentially kidnapping her, making the upcoming father-daughter dance particularly painful. Valene suggests Gary step in, leading to entertaining rehearsals for their magic act. But there's something brewing beneath the surface as Abby takes a suspicious interest in the arrangements, culminating in her unexpected insertion into what should be just Gary and Olivia's special night.<br><br>The episode masterfully balances comedy with subtle romantic tension, revealing Lily Mae as what the host calls "country dumb" – a woman who doesn't miss a thing despite her seemingly naive exterior. Her ability to transform disaster into opportunity showcases why she's become such a fan favorite, while Abby's lingering glances at Gary hint at potential complications that could rock the cul-de-sac in episodes to come. Subscribe now to follow these intertwining tales of deception, ambition, and unexpected romance!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
I forgot.
Lily Mae was a criminal Out onbail for shot in jail,
california dreamin' sheshouldn't have got on that bus
or crossed state lines.
I think that might be a felony,but maybe not in her case.
Ladies and gentlemen, boys andgirls, welcome and welcome back
to another fun-filled edition ofSoFloor.
I'm your host, jeb, viewing andreviewing the sopiest, suddiest
primetime storylines of 1982.
(00:22):
We're back on the West Coast,always doing the absolute most
in a dream come true for me.
So, whether you're new to thisor true to this, get back and
enjoy.
Tell the kids it's time to playoutside or, out of sight, tell
babe no questions, suggestionsor concerns.
For the next 25 to 35 minutes,everyone else in Earshot, cool,
quiet or Kicked Out are youronly options, because we are
(00:44):
watching our stories.
Ladies and gentlemen, boys andgirls, this is SoFluid.
Hello, gorgeous, welcome orwelcome back to another
fun-filled edition of SoFluid.
I hope your day is shaking upwell.
(01:13):
Mine is looking like it mightbe all right.
I am beyond excited to bringtoday's episode to you because
we get to once again be dazzledby the vocal stylings of Miss
Lily Mae.
What is Lily Mae's last name?
I don't know and I'm afraid tolook it up because I'm afraid of
spoilers.
Thank you for joining me today.
If you are new to this, welcomeIf you are true to this.
Thank you so much for all ofyour well wishes, thoughts and
(01:35):
behind the scenes tidbits.
I really really appreciate them, especially since I'm afraid of
spoilers, which brings me to afun piece of fan mail, a
correction and a little bit of aguess going forward.
So go ahead and grab yourselfsomething bubbly and bright,
settle in as we jump back intoKnot's Landing.
(01:56):
Season three, episode nine theRose and the Briar.
I feel like that's a book orsomething, the Raven and the
Briar, something like that.
I don't really know what thatis.
I think a briar is a garden.
I might look it up here in alittle bit, but in the meantime,
in between time, I am beyondexcited.
Ask children and you willreceive.
(02:16):
On the last episode, Iexpressed my absolute need for
more of this diamond in therough, miss lily may, and she
does not disappoint this episode.
We also get a whole nothercrossover.
I tell you what the soap operaworld is minuscule.
It is so tiny.
We have another crossovercharacter from dynasty of all
(02:38):
places, and he brought me morejoy than I deserve on this one
too.
So let let's jump into some fanmail.
I have a couple questions here.
All right, my first piece offan mail today is from Candice.
She says hey Jen, my name isCandice and I'm an OG who grew
up loving Falcon Crest.
I'm so excited, I was soexcited to come across your
(02:59):
podcast and I think you're doinga great job.
After the review of Body Rock, Igot a little bit curious about
your taste in films from thatgenre.
Are you familiar with any ofthe John Hughes films and, if so
, which ones?
Also, since you have a disdainfor the 80s, have you found
(03:20):
yourself watching any other 80sfilms since watching the soap
operas?
Thank you, candace.
Well, have I found myselfwatching any 80s films?
Here's the honest truth.
I went to look up John Hughesreal quick After I got that,
(03:41):
because it's like the namesounds familiar.
I just I couldn't put a face tothe name, and now I realize why
.
I guess he did all the sort ofteen films from the 80s.
Yes, I have seen several ofthose, but I have not seen them
recently Other than the BodyRock film.
I haven't really gone out of myway to watch any 80s films.
It's not a bad idea.
(04:02):
I'm kind of liking that idea ofmaybe watching some 80s teen
films, but I think I had apretty good start with those
movies.
So here's the thing about beingan 80s baby.
90s kids, kid I definitely haveseen, like Pretty in Pink.
I've watched the Breakfast Club.
I've probably seen theBreakfast Club a few times as an
(04:24):
adult, maybe within the lastfive years or so, but I can't
say I've fully seen 16 Candles.
I know I've seen big chunks ofit.
I think that is that where shemakes the dress.
And then I've seen the onewhere Molly Ringwald was
pregnant and she had, like thishaughty boyfriend and they were
kicked out for being pregnant,as far as I can tell, and they
(04:47):
showered in a room with no walls.
That's like the distinct memoryI have.
So, with that being said, Idon't know when I saw that I
definitely had to been.
I don't know if I was three orfour and just I have these
flashbacks of being in my aunt'sliving room.
I spent a lot of time watchingwhatever was on HBO.
I knew to cover my eyes duringthe dirty bits because you know,
(05:10):
this is the 80s, kids weren'tsuper precious then I either had
to go outside or cover my facewith a blanket if a kissing
scene or something came up and,sadly, sad to say, I still may
or may not fast forward throughthose parts.
Now, like as an adult, even ifthey're kissing a little bit too
(05:31):
long on TV, I'm like, oh, Ifeel weird, I feel like I need
to cover my eyes or do somethingelse.
That's so funny.
I'm totally not approved, Ipromise.
But no, yeah, I've definitelyseen those movies, as a matter
of fact.
Sadly, today, as I was recording, I saw the news about Val
Kilmer and just, oh, makes me so, so sad.
(05:53):
I hate to hear that.
He's one of the first movies Iremember he was in one of the
first movies I remember watching.
I definitely remember Lost Boysbecause I thought the one, the
blonde kid who turned out to beBill or Ted from Bill and Ted's
Excellent Adventure, was in itand I thought he was so cute.
I watched a movie with a guy inVal Kilmer about science.
(06:15):
Now, I could have sworn thiswas Sarah Jessica Parker's
little brother.
Don't ask me where I got thatidea.
I guess I saw an interview withher at some point where she
said she had a brother and in mymind, I just made that kid her
brother.
He's totally not her brother,but I remember Val Kilmer made a
house.
He didn't make it explode buthe like filled it with popcorn
(06:37):
and I remember being very, veryimpressed by that.
I don't even think I was inkindergarten yet, being a very
small kid thinking like, wow,this is what science is.
And you know what I've lovedscience ever since.
I'm going to have to do alittle tribute to him because I
have truly, truly enjoyed hiswork over the years.
(06:58):
I watched the documentary afterhe got sick and he had the
surgery and just what a oh Godmade me real, real, real sad.
But to answer your question, Ihave definitely seen a lot of
80s films.
As a matter of fact, I couldprobably put together a quick
little list and, for whateverreason, I really enjoyed those.
But, um, yeah, I hadn't goneback as an adult.
After watching the soap operasI feel like I've been more honed
(07:21):
in on the shows.
Hadn't really made me want towatch any film that I hadn't
already seen.
Next piece of fan mail comesfrom Joseph.
Joseph says hey, jet, I'm amillennial, also an 80s baby,
90s kid, and I'm watching theseshows for the first time and
having a great time.
And in parentheses, it says I'mnew to this.
(07:42):
Soon to be true to this.
I wanted to know how you avoidspoilers.
How have you been able to enjoythe show without running into
any obvious plot twists orgiveaways?
Joseph, I'm glad you asked.
It's a very good question and Ithink here's the thing With
(08:04):
these shows being, most of thembeing at least 40 years old, I
don't feel like they come up ingeneral conversation.
But you're right, the longer Iwatch them, the more like my
Google algorithm has changed alittle bit.
I've noticed the other day, Ithink Dallas just turned 47.
So if what I do?
If I see something that comesacross my timeline or comes
(08:25):
across my news feed, I will onlyread the title, because titles
very rarely give you any othersort of giveaway.
I think the only way to do itis you just can't go digging too
deeply a character, like if I'meulogizing someone whose
(08:46):
character died on the show, I'llgo to like Wikipedia and maybe
just read the first little bitor just go to their body of work
.
You got to skip over the biggerbits because they might give it
away.
You can do like read theirearly years, read things like
that.
I've been very, very lucky asfar as not having any major
spoilers spoiled for me.
Again, I don't go looking, Idon't know.
(09:08):
You just you gotta stayvigilant, my friend.
You, just you gotta, you gottastay vigilant.
That's all I can say,especially if you're not like
I'm reviewing them, so I have totake the pace a little bit
slower.
I think I would probably burnthrough these really quickly
otherwise.
Um, but I like the pace I'mgoing.
I think originally I wanted todo it every week so that it
(09:30):
would feel as authentic as itdid when they aired, and that's
been pretty good.
Like, I enjoy the buildup andthe anticipation but, yeah, be
very careful, don't put too manypeople on to it.
I've already told some friendsand then we wanted to talk about
it.
I'm like, listen, don't saynothing to me.
I can't, I can't hear that.
Don't talk to me, don't sayanything.
Also, seeing pictures of thecast has come up a little bit
(09:55):
more lately for me and, um, Ialways look, but I don't really
think a lot about it.
But now that I've seen um, Ithink it was like from season
two to three of Dynasty.
I'm like, oh okay, there weregiveaways there.
But if you don't know, you don'tknow.
Things are just going to goover your head.
You don't really know.
So, joseph, do your best to notgo digging too deeply and you
(10:19):
should be fine.
Only look at people afterthey've been kicked off the show
, hopefully.
And even there I start to get alittle bit nervous because my
own theory about soap poppers isthat nobody's ever really
really gone.
You never know if they're goingto pop up at another time.
So just be careful.
I don't know.
That's my only advice.
Be careful.
All right, if you have anyquestions, concerns or tips, you
(10:41):
can send us a text.
Just check the show notes ifyou're listening on your mobile
device, and you can always emailus at soplorepodcast at
gmailcom.
Let's get into Lily Mae, y'all.
Lily Mae oh my god.
For someone like me who's anelder millennial, it's not a far
concept for me to sort of graspthe thought that a parent could
be absolutely not obsessed withtheir child.
(11:03):
I think as the years have goneby, I'd say after the 2000s,
parents have sort of focused inon the kids a little bit more.
But I don't feel like I was thecenter of anyone's world
growing up, and that's not a badthing?
It's not a bad thing at all.
I had time to develop myself.
I had a lot of free time whereI had to discover things about
(11:26):
myself, and I don't think that'snecessarily a bad thing.
Lily Mae is a quintessential Iguess she is.
I don't know if she's silentgeneration.
I feel like she'd be a littlebit older than that.
But Lily Mae had a baby andwhat?
That's not her problem, that isthe baby's problem.
I gave birth to you.
(11:46):
What else do you want from me?
So at the the top of thisepisode we get to see Valene,
lily Mae and Karen in a littlecoop and Valene is on her way to
drop Lily Mae off, whose lastname is Clements.
I saw it in the opening credits.
I went back.
Lily Mae Clements isvolunteering her precious time
(12:08):
at an old folks home and she'sgoing on and on with Karen about
how important it is to spendtime with the elderly.
Such a good thing, it does sogood things, but my spirit is so
wonderful.
And then Karen is buying intothis and she says yeah, I was a
candy stripper myself.
Here's the thing Lily Mae ismagic, whether you want to
accept it or not.
The only person who seesthrough Lily Mae fully is Valene
(12:31):
, because she is blood of herblood, flesh of her flesh.
But I was fully convinced at thetop of this episode that Lily
Mae was running yet another scam.
I thought she was having Valenedrop her off at the old
people's home only so she couldskedaddle somewhere else and run
some sort of scam.
(12:52):
That's not the case.
She actually goes into the oldpeople's home and it's worth
noting that.
Oh gosh, if I had to guess,lily Mae's probably about 52
years old, which is not anywherenear being.
I mean, she's not an elderlywoman, she's an older woman.
She's definitely not geriatricin any way.
(13:13):
She's young, she's vibrant,she's having a good time and she
has washed the the foam curlsout of her hair.
I knew that was a wet set.
I know a foam roller set when Isee it.
She didn't commit to the permbecause Lily Mae Clements don't
commit to anything.
Mylene is all too happy to dropher off.
(13:34):
She tells Karen girl, oh my god, when I tell you the old people
home didn't come soon enough,baby girl, I can't take, I can't
stand this woman.
I am so proud to drop her off.
Any opportunity I get I'll doit again and again, praise the
Lord for the geriatrics.
I second that, valene.
(13:54):
I second that.
That's neither here nor there.
Because old people love a goodstory, they love company,
they're lonely.
You know what I'm saying, andLily Mae understands that.
One of the lessons I've learnedas I've grown older is that
sometimes people don't reallywant a solution.
Sometimes people just want anaudience, and that's exactly
(14:17):
what the elderly are offeringLily Mae Clements.
So she's in there during thebingo game and she is killing it
.
She is working the room like apro and she happens upon a
gentleman who's a little bitrough around the edges, wearing
a cap, and he says hey, I reallydig you.
And I'm looking at him.
I said wait a minute, hold up,wait a minute.
(14:37):
I know that ain't.
I know that ain't.
We're just gonna be a newseries.
I know that ain't Jack fromDynasty not Allegra's kidnapper,
baby, it is Allegra's kidnapper.
Immediately my heckles were up.
I was like, oh my God, lilyMaeve, I don't know nothing else
.
I know you're smarter than this.
(14:59):
But here's the thing when youwant an audience, maybe you
don't really care if thataudience is genuine or not.
If you want the applause,you're going to get the applause
.
So she and Jack from Dynastystart to exchange a few
pleasantries oh, you're cute,you're cute, we're good, we're
good.
Hey, why don't you come over tomy daughter's house for dinner?
(15:21):
They take a long walk in thepark and Lily Mae is all too
eager to say you know what?
I come for money.
Now Jack, whose name escapes meon this show, is like word you
come from money.
She said.
Well, I don't really come frommoney.
What happened was my daughtermarried one of the Texas Ewing's
.
So the implication is that sheis a wealthy woman well
(15:45):
unbeknownst to her, or or notreally, we'll get to that later.
Jack from Dynasty, the horsekidnapper, is like oh, let me
turn up my charm.
So there's this running jokethat the Rock is the exact same
person in every single movie.
He just takes off a jacket orputs on a jacket.
This is no different.
Jack from Dynasty, circa 1984,is Jackson on Knott's Landing
(16:11):
circa 1982.
He's still involved innefarious activities.
He's still a scoundrel, but youknow what he is.
He is taken aback by thedazzling personality of Miss
Lillian May Clements.
They fall in love over a bingogame.
They wax poetic about theirpast endeavors.
(16:32):
Apparently to her, mr JacksonMobley used to be a big time
music executive in Nashville,tennessee.
Now that is music to a personlike Lily Mae's ears, because
guess where she's been trying tohustle and make it big?
Nashville, tennessee, becauseshe is a country and western
star.
After a back and forth withmany, many tall tales, she
(16:55):
invites him over to dinner.
Now it occurred to me that Texasis a unique state.
It's unique because it's solarge.
There are four differentterrains in Texas, and Texas
likes to indoctrinate theirchildren while they're in school
with Texas history, whichincludes something called a tall
(17:16):
tale.
Now, we all understand thesestories aren't 100% factual, but
they are intended to give amoral or historical lesson, if
you're willing to accept it.
Tall tales are a vital part ofthe Texas backbone.
Now Ms DiMobile is an expert ontall tales.
(17:38):
Now here's a gotcha.
Gotcha, as I've learned aboutLily Mae, the more I see her,
the more I understand that thiswoman is what you would call
country dumb.
She's not missing a damn thing.
She is absorbing everything.
She understands the assignment,she knows what's going on at
all times.
So I fully didn't expect ahustler like Mobley to get one
(18:00):
over on her, but again, like Isaid at the top of the episode.
She doesn't want a solution, shewants an audience.
She is at the point in her lifewhere her daughter is telling
her to suck it up and get real.
But she needs someone tobelieve in her dreams.
So perhaps they have a mutualexchange here.
He knows he's full of ish.
He knows that she knows he'sfull of ish, but she indulges
(18:23):
him either way.
She knows that he knows she'sfull of ish, but he indulges her
either way.
Now is this simpatico or isthis a fiasco in the making?
Time will tell.
In the meantime, in betweentime, we have a subplot Little
Olivia.
Olivia has brought us at leastthree different storylines and
(18:46):
I've enjoyed each and every oneof them.
Apparently, olivia is back onthe cul-de-sac, she's on the
mend.
She's got a broken arm and sheseems to be healing well
physically, but mentally thingsaren't so great.
So Abby meets her at the busstop and Olivia jumps off the
bus.
There's another little girlwho's ahead of her with her
(19:06):
mother and she's like bye,olivia.
Olivia ignores her, so she saysit louder bye, olivia.
And Olivia looks over likethat's cute.
Abby says Olivia, what's wrong?
Olivia says you know what?
Sarah Ames is a giant baby.
It appears that Olivia has opsall over the elementary school.
(19:27):
She she can't even live herlife in peace.
All she wants to do is get aneducation, eat a little lunch,
have a little play date, but herops won't let her live.
Abby says girl, what's wrong?
Olivia says you know what?
Sarah Ames told the entireclass that I can't be at the
father-daughter dance because mydad is liable to kidnap me.
(19:48):
Ooh, I know we're supposed tohate Sarah Ames and Ada Bixby.
She called both of them bigbabies.
But I hear no lies.
Your father is liable to kidnapyou, which is why your mother
had to press charges, which iswhy he can't be at the
father-daughter dance.
That is at his own demise.
That is at his own hands.
(20:08):
I don't blame Abby for that atall.
It is what it is.
I stand with Abby.
But Abby starts to thinking like, damn, not having their dad in
their life is going to reallysuck.
I did not think of theimmediate consequences.
So she ends up having a briefconversation with Val about it
and Val's like, hey, why notbring Gary in?
And Gary can fill in, he can dowhatever he needs to do,
(20:29):
because Olivia's like yo, noteverybody has a daddy.
Some people have stepdaddies,some people have their mom's
boyfriend, other people arecoming I have no one and then
Sid's dead, so her uncle can'teven show up.
Her cousins are far too youngto represent her as, like, a
father figure.
So the only person left is Gary, according to Valene.
(20:50):
Now Abby's like are you sure?
Now I was thinking to myself.
I would double think that too,because yes, gary has a daughter
, but he's a crappy dad.
I almost lost my religion realquick.
He's never raised anybody.
Yeah, he might be, he's, he'sfine, he's okay, he's fine.
But is he good with children?
We'll never know, because he'sonly spent like 48 hours with
(21:13):
his own daughter.
I thought he was a poor choice.
I would have gone with maybe aKenny or a Richard, because
Kenny's on his new daddy daycarea bit.
But no, they decide that Gary.
So Darlene fills Gary and he'slike baby, why would you?
Why would you say that?
Why would I do that?
I don't want to go over thereand help that woman.
She's like please just do itfor Olivia.
(21:34):
You know, val loves the kids,she loves the cheering.
So he goes over and he andOlivia work out this beautiful
sort of magician shtick and it'sreally good.
And Abby sees it.
She's like, yeah, this isperfection.
I'm going to be honest, Iwatched this entire episode.
I didn't really think much of ituntil like halfway through
there's a scene where things aregoing on with Lily Mae that
(21:56):
require Gary's attention.
Abby comes into the filecabinet room.
She's talking to Gary Now hedoesn't see he's Gary's kind of
dense.
He's not really thinking aboutmuch, he's just handling the
task at hand.
And Abby's like well, are yougoing to be able to help my
daughter?
She's going to be sodisappointed.
(22:17):
You have to show up.
She's going to be sodisappointed.
And he's basically telling herlisten, I might need to take
care of some other businesswhich we will get into in a
second Right.
And I didn't think Abby was allthat I don't know.
I didn't think she was all thateager.
I wasn't really clocking much.
But I clocked Karen in thebackground.
So I'm like, oh, something'sgoing on here.
So Karen interrupts and thenshe's like am I interrupting
(22:41):
Abby's?
Not, abby don't care.
Y'all know Abby don't give adamn.
She gonna do what she needs todo and she moves on and it's at
this point I remember that Abbywas a little bit sweet on Gary
at some point but I thought itwas a moot point after the whole
FBI came in to investigate thestolen parts thing.
I don't really feel likethere's been much chemistry, so
(23:01):
much so that I've totallyforgotten about it.
We're eight episodes into seasonthree.
I didn't think anything of it.
But Karen in the background islike, uh, is everything cool?
And then she gives Gary awarning.
She's like listen, abby has away of making things happen,
something to that effect.
I'm not giving you verbatim,you'll have to watch to see what
she says exactly.
(23:23):
Okay, let's get back to Lily Mae.
So I want you to keep in mindthat Lily Mae is inviting this
man over.
Mowgli's going to come over andeat, but they have already had
a little lunchy poo in the parkand she tells him that, oh, she
and Valene were down home peoplebefore Valene married into the
Ewing family and Ewing money orno, valene needs her mother.
(23:46):
You know she's been a devotedmother.
Lily Mae is Been a devotedmother.
I even gave up my singing careerto come and help her.
That's wolf ticket number one.
Back in my day, or I guess backin my grandmother's day, she'd
say you're selling wolf ticketsLike you're lying, like the big
bad wolf trying to get in yourhouse.
(24:07):
You're selling wolf tickets.
So Lily Mae said yeah, I gaveup my singing career.
I'm a country and western star.
I gave up my whole career tocome help my daughter.
And he said no kidding, youknow, I used to be an artist
manager.
Matter of fact, I managed PatsyCline before she died.
She was going to come to myhouse.
No, a couple things happened tome.
(24:34):
When I watch this show I feelmy accidents start to kind of
seep through.
But I think it's because I'vespent so much time with old
people and I definitely knowsome old hustles, and that's
exactly the type of thingsomebody like that would say.
But granted, this is 1982,there's no internet, there's no.
Uh, I mean, you got to send aletter to get a lot of
information out to people.
Not everybody has a TV.
At this point he can prettymuch say whatever he wants.
(24:54):
Who's going to check him?
Who's going to pull the records?
So this starts making.
You know, lily May is like oh myGod, oh my God, oh, happy day,
I'm about to get paid, I'm aboutto be a superstar.
That's when she invites himover to dinner.
So when she comes bursting inthe house valine has just told
gary that he needs to helpolivia out and he's like man, I
ain't trying to be with them.
(25:14):
Kids, go tell her somebody else, get somebody else to do it.
She's like no, just do it,figure it out.
Well, lily may comes in andhe's like hey, lily, may you
look good, he likes browling herup and damn it if I don't like
him riling her up a little bit.
So Lily Mae's like baby, can Ihelp?
(25:35):
Val's like no, you could.
She don't want her in herkitchen.
Girl, just, I didn't even knowyou was home.
No, well, listen, I got companycoming over.
He's an artist manager.
He's gonna help me in my career.
And Val's like I know you lying.
Why didn know you lying?
Why didn't you call mama?
Why didn't you tell me?
Well, you weren't here when Igot home.
And Valene's like because I wasout buying dinner for three
(25:58):
people.
What am I going to do with afourth person?
Well, we're having chickenfricassee at fricassee fricassee
, something like that.
And Valene's like yeah, I ampreparing chicken fricassee,
lily.
I am preparing chickenfricassee.
Lily Mae's like well, just addsome more rice in, it'll be fine
.
He's coming over anyway.
Oh, and also follow my lead.
Whatever I say, just nod andagree.
So Eveline already knows it'sgoing to be some bull.
(26:19):
And my heart, I'm having a goodtime.
But Val is like, oh my God,gary, gary, you better get your
mother-in-law, sweet jesus, youbetter get this woman.
You better get her before I gether.
Lily may is tap dancing andfiddle deeing all over valine's
(26:40):
last nerve.
So now she's got to scrambleand stretch out this meal.
That really should be for twopeople, but mama is a squatter.
Now it's gonna have to be forfour.
This is amazing.
So they sit down to eat.
Gary, valine, jackson mogley andloretta lend me a dollar
(27:00):
herself.
And jackson mogley startstelling this tale about how,
when he was a kid, he was on hisuncle's farm and this chicken
laid these glowing, dark eggs.
They were so bright, so vibrant, that they used those eggs to
light up the house for the restof the summer.
Now Gary cackles at this.
He's a Texan.
He's like that is the tallesttail I've ever heard.
And Jackson's like no, it ain't.
(27:21):
This is the honest to God'struth.
But it's all in fun.
Everybody knows he's, you know,looks like oh my gosh.
She's just rubbing her headlike oh my god, how did I end up
with two of these people?
And she's right, lily Mae hadsaid at some point she's like I
knew I felt a kindred spiritbecause he told her he was a an
artist manager or something.
But the truth is it takes oneto know one, a hustler, that is.
(27:44):
So Val tells Gary hey, it's timeto get over, go over and help
Olivia with her project.
She thinks she's going to go inthe kitchen and wash dishes and
then just sort of slip into bed.
Lily Mae has other plans.
Oh, valene, thank you so muchfor helping me make dinner.
Wolf ticket number three.
And Val looks like girl, youdon't, okay, yeah, yeah, I
(28:08):
helped, something like that.
Lily Mae says put down themdishes, bow, come, come in the
living room with mr mogli andlisten to me sing.
I can tell in that moment shewould have.
Oh god, she wishes she was garyso bad.
So they go in the living roomand you know exactly what song
she sings.
The prettiest thing I ever didsee was the clouds drifting high
(28:33):
in the pine country.
That's my jam.
I don't care what anybody says,I love it, I love it.
Once the guy leaves, valene islike mama, please that man.
Everything he said was a lie.
She's a little girl.
You just don't understand men.
(28:54):
You don't understand a man likehim.
He's a visionary.
You're not a visionary like meand him you don't understand.
Side note, though, um valine iswearing this outfit.
It's like these gray pants anda not so much a suit jacket,
maybe sort of a members onlyjacket, but it's cut to fit a
woman.
It's a very feminine cut jacket.
It's like a windbreakermaterial.
I think I love it.
(29:16):
I've never seen anything likeit.
Now, granted, I can't hear theswish, swish, swish when she
walks.
So maybe it's not windbreakermaterial, but it is cute, cute,
cute.
Do yourself a favor and watchthis episode.
It is so cute, okay.
So Lily Mae and Mr Mosleycontinue to get along.
They get along so much thatthey are asked to babysit Ginger
(29:37):
and Kenny's baby while they goout and have themselves a good
time.
Now Ginger can't wait to dropthis crying baby, baby in two
names.
Lily Mae comes over and bringsMosley.
Now Lily Mae goes in thekitchen immediately.
You can tell this is the typeof woman she is.
Ginger and Kenny say helpyourself to whatever, we'll be
back early.
Yes, people mean that, but theyalso don't mean like, don't go
(29:58):
crazy.
Obviously, restrain yourself.
Lily Mae immediately goes to thekitchen and starts to prepare
some snacks.
So let me raid thisrefrigerator real quick, mr
Mosley.
Well, I guess the sticky fingerspirit was upon Mr Mosley,
because he immediately startssnooping around like hey, this
place is pretty nice.
He opens a coffee can behindthe couch and there's some money
(30:20):
in it.
Now, to my naked eye, I sawfive.
I'm thinking this is probably Idon't know probably $25 at most
, it's not.
He quickly stuffs it away inhis pocket and by the time Lily
Mae returns from her cabinet,reading the cheese tray, jackson
Mowgli has a bright idea.
(30:41):
Say Lily Mae, I know we've onlyknown each other 14 minutes.
Why don't we go get married,married?
Why would I get married?
Yeah, we're not getting anyyounger.
Let's go to Vegas, then we'llgo on to Nashville and make you
a superstar.
This little bit of money in hispocket has changed everything
for him.
Yeah, baby, I got money.
Now, he didn't tell her that.
Let me be very clear.
(31:01):
She doesn't know he took anymoney.
So the next day she quietlypacks up some clothes, meets him
at the bus stop and they takethe longest Greyhound bus ride
in the history of history to LasVegas.
Now, I didn't think that wasthat hard to get to Vegas.
I feel like if you're anywherein the Southwest you can fly
pretty easily, even if you rodea bus.
(31:21):
I don't think it will be allday and all night.
So while Lily Mae is sitting inher seat serenading small
children with her, all her songsare about dying or death or
something.
As she serenades the childrenon the bus, tell me why Jackson
Mowgli is in the back back ofthe bus slinging dice.
(31:43):
What is that crap?
Snake eyes, whatever that gameis.
He's rolling the dice.
He rolls the dice for theentire duration of this trip, so
much so that by the time theyget to Vegas he's running low on
cash.
Let's go back to the cul-de-sac, because we've got to tie all
this together.
So Lily Mae didn't tell Valeneanything.
So Valene is in the kitchenpreparing dinner for three.
(32:03):
Gary comes home and he's likehey, where's your mama?
Because I don't know.
I see my mama all day.
Oh, so she's not here.
No, she's not here.
So he's like hey, uh, you knowwhat I'm saying.
You know.
I said I've been working out.
Why don't we go upstairs andtake a nap.
Wink, wink, gary, I can't, I'mcooking.
Well, he starts, you know hestarts.
(32:26):
Um, he knows how to use hishands or whatever.
He's caressing her and beforeyou know it, she's like you know
what the hell with this chicken?
Come on, gary.
Gary has been relatively quietthis entire season, but on this
show, on this episode, we seethe triumphant return of the
(32:48):
baby blue boy shorts, the teeny,tiny shorts he likes to sleep
in.
This man comes out of thebathroom with a robe, stands in
front of the bed and disrobes.
Now I would think, okay, we'renot going to go there In your
own house.
Why would you bother putting ona robe?
Maybe it's to dry off, maybenot, I don't know.
He wants the audience toremember that he is fine, fine,
okay.
Looks like he shaved his chesta little bit.
(33:13):
He got a little tan.
He makes sure to flex when hegets in the bed, even turns over
.
This is the night previous.
He turns over on the side.
Hey, valine, could you rub myarm?
Well, this gives him theopportunity to hoist his head up
with his arm and flex, so wecan see.
Oh, we, we get it, gary, youfine, fine.
We get it, gary, you fine, fine, we get it.
Once they get through taking anap, ow, they're eating dinner.
(33:34):
And he's like damn Val, thischicken is dry, she goes.
Well, you know, it was in theoven an extra 30 minutes, he's
all.
Yeah, that's right, man, I getit.
I get it, you're hot, gary, weget it.
So while they were doing thehalf hour horizontal hustle,
kenny also steps out of theshower at his house.
(33:54):
This is now.
This is day of.
This is the day that lily mayhas got on the bus.
He steps out of his shower andhe says hey, ginger, you got any
money.
I didn't get to stop by thebank today.
She's busy trying to get abigger booty for the summer,
doing all sorts of weird likeleg movements and stuff to stack
the thing up.
She's busy trying to get abigger booty for the summer,
doing all sorts of weird, likeleg movements and stuff to stack
the thing up.
She's like uh, no, why don'tyou just take it from our
(34:15):
emergency?
Can they have a little banterback and forth?
But if we keep taking moneywe'll never have any.
She goes.
I put thirty dollars in thereyesterday, it's fine.
So he goes to the can and it'sempty, empty.
He goes no, you must have usedit on something.
No, she.
She says no, no, no, Idefinitely put $30 in there
yesterday.
It can't be gone.
The only people who were herewere, and she doesn't say it.
(34:36):
She's like no, it couldn't havebeen Lily Mae, she's too nice
to do something like that.
Kenny said well, you remembershe did steal that scarf.
And Ginger's like damn, yeah,she did.
Let the record reflect.
According to lily may, shedidn't steal the scarf.
She simply took it from itslocation inside the store,
(34:57):
stuffed it within her breastpocket, walked outside so she
could see it in the light of day, never mind the big picture
window.
Well, kenny's, like you know, Idon't think lily may would have
taken the money, but what aboutthat weirdo she was with?
And then she said I don't know,I don't think Lily Mae would
have taken the money, but whatabout that weirdo she was with?
And then she said I don't know,I don't know him like that.
Maybe, maybe not.
So they go over to Gary andValene's.
Kenny does, and he's like hey,what do you know about that guy
(35:19):
that's dating Lily Mae?
Valene hears this, she goeswell, I don't know much about
him.
Kenny explains the situation.
She's like oh mama, all day Idon't know where they're at.
Gary had driven Mobley home, orat least he thought he did.
So Valene suggests that they goover to Mobley's house to maybe
just talk to him, see if LilyMae is over there.
Now the truth of the matter isthat Gary did drop him off at a
(35:43):
place, but Mobley never actuallywalked inside.
It wasn't his real house.
So they really are none thewiser about where he lives.
At one point Val was reallyconcerned that he might live in
a scatheed neighborhood.
Does he have a nice house?
Did you meet his son and such?
And Gary's just kind ofsniggling the whole time.
Gary's doing whatever.
He's told this whole episode.
He doesn't really talk a lot,unless he's trying to get Valene
in the sack and remind the restof the audience that he's fine,
(36:05):
fine.
So he ends up going over to thehouse with Kenny and of course
they're not there.
Now Val's getting worried.
Kenny suggests that they callthe police.
Val's like I can't, mama's onparole.
I forgot Lily Mae was acriminal Out on bail for shot in
jail California, dreaming sheshouldn't have got on that bus
(36:27):
or crossed state lines.
I think that might be a felony,but maybe not in her case.
So eventually Lily Mae doescall and Valene is like Mama,
where are you?
I can't believe you left allday and didn't say nothing.
Lily Mae's like don't worryabout that.
Now I'm telling you where I'mat.
I'm at the Alhambra Hotel inLas Vegas.
I'm about to marry.
Mr Mowgli.
Val's like what, gary?
We got to go.
(36:48):
They hang up, they get in thecar and they make it to Vegas in
15 minutes.
Now this, of course, puts adamper on the Olivia magic show
plans.
Gary briefly explains as he andVal are hustling out of the
house to Abby Listen, we got togo take care of something with
Lily Mae.
We'll be back as soon as we can.
Are you going to make the show?
I don't know.
We'll be back as soon as we can.
So meanwhile in Vegas, mowgli'sat the slot machine just
(37:12):
dropping quarter after quarterafter quarter, losing and losing
, and losing.
Lily Mae goes over to him andsays hey, honey, let's go ahead
and check in.
I need to freshen up.
He goes oh no, honey, I'd liketo do a little bit more gambling
.
If you don't mind, we'll go upin a minute.
She's like no, no, I need tofreshen up.
(37:35):
Let's go up now, let's go aheadand check in.
It was okay.
Well, we'll have to use yourcredit card because they don't
take cash here.
She's like credit card.
Yeah, your your credit card,you're rich, you ain't, don't?
You have a credit card?
Maybe?
No, like I said before, I don't.
I don't have money like that.
Now here's a funny part.
She did explain to him when sheinitially met him that she and
that Valene were down home folks.
Valene married into the TexasEwing's.
(37:57):
She never said she was rich,but it was an assumption.
He brings up her wealth one moretime and she doesn't say
anything.
She doesn't correct him and sayhey, no, no, no, I don't have
money like that.
It's just, you know, she'sattached, my daughter is to this
wealthy oil family.
Well, lily Mae said no, sir, Idon't have no credit card.
Let me just, I might as welltell you this I'm as poor as a
(38:18):
church mouse.
I don't have any money.
He goes well, I might as welltell you this I don't have any
money, basically the money I hadI've lost in the back of the
bus.
And she goes oh, you're somegambler.
Then like, yeah, I lied to youabout that.
I don't really have no money.
So Lily Mae doesn't take itpersonal.
She busts out laughing likewell, hell, I was lying to
(38:39):
impress you.
I thought you were gonnaelevate my career.
I lied about everything.
And he goes hell, I lied too.
Matter of fact, I've never beena music producer in my life.
Well, they get a good oldraucous laugh out of this.
I'm like wow, lily Mae isunfadable.
This is where this woman turnslemons into organic deep tissue
(39:01):
peel.
She's that good.
This is why I know this womanis gonna be all right.
My mom used to have this thinglike if you did something dumb,
she'd be like you ought to beshocked, shamed and embarrassed.
Lily Mae is neither shocked,nor is she shamed, nor is she
embarrassed about anything.
So she's like hey, way I see it, jackson, you're a liar, I'm a
(39:25):
liar, I've been spinning talltales.
You're a silver tongue devil.
Both.
Both of us are old.
Both of us have clearly gottenaway with this for decades.
Why don't we combine forces andjust lean into our natural
gifts?
Ie lying and he's like that's ahell of an idea, let's do it.
So she coaches him on what tosay.
She's like I want to sing atthe sidewinder, I'm going to sit
(39:47):
out here on this bench.
I, winder, I'm going to sit outhere on this bench.
I want you to go inside and doexactly as I say.
And I tell you what.
You shouldn't be proud of aliar, but I was dang proud of
him.
Jackson Mowgli gets in front ofthe I guess, the owner of the
hotel, and he's like hey, youreally need to hear my woman,
lily Mae.
She is an incredible, justdiamond in the rough type of
(40:09):
talent.
She really needs to sing herown lounge.
And it was like man, don'tnobody want to hear nobody's
grandma sing, mogul?
He says no, you don'tunderstand.
Not only is she incrediblytalented, but we've been married
30 years and she's got aterminal illness.
She don't have much longer.
It is her dream to sing in thisfine hotel and I really think
your patrons will enjoy that.
You're a married man, right?
And the owner's like yeah, I amhe.
(40:31):
Well, wouldn't you do justanything and I mean absolutely
anything to make your wife'sdream come true?
Sold, before you know it, lilyMae, lily Mae has her first
Vegas residency.
Even if it is for one dayduring happy hour, don't matter,
she's in there now, baby, she'sin there.
You can't tell her nothing.
I guess if you stay ready youdon't have to get ready because
(40:54):
it takes no time at all for LilyMae to put on a three-tier puff
sleeve, sweetheart necklineprairie dress and that wig that
what's her name?
Velma?
Do y'all remember that showMama's Family, the lady who was
(41:14):
the son's wife?
What was his name?
Vance, I get that and rebamixed up.
Anyway, she used to have thisreally curly sort of mulledy
long hairdo.
Look like lily may.
Stacked three church ladygrandma wigs on top of each
other.
But she looked cute, don't gether twisted.
She was in there when I tellyou what she put on a great show
.
Everybody seemed to reallyreally be into it.
(41:36):
Gary and val make it right aboutthe time she lands on stage,
right?
I guess val just knew my mamahas slithered her way into the
sidewinder.
She probably told gary gary,look for a crowd of people
listening to mama sing about thedead hollows or whatever.
So they get into the lounge andLily Mae is killing it.
She's at the final few notes ofher song and, for whatever
(41:58):
reason, val is not embarrassedby this song.
She doesn't look mortified,she's actually feeling it.
There's a drunk man shouting atthe top of his lung he needs his
three dollar drink ticket.
Hey, shut up, shut up, sit down.
That's my mom up there sayingit Be quiet.
He obliges her.
He doesn't try to fight her.
He's like oh okay, my bad,sorry.
(42:22):
Well, right about this time MrMosley decides it's time for him
to skedaddle into the wind.
Once Lily Mae gets off stage,she chases them down outside and
he says you know what, honey,the best thing in your life will
be just to leave me.
By the way, I stole $200 fromyour neighbor, so you know I got
to be on the run.
Lily Mae's probably thinkingwell, hell, I guess I can pay
(42:47):
for that out of my residencymoney, but I also should
probably get back to California.
I'm definitely on parole and Idon't want Valene to call my PO,
so I got to go.
I don't want Valene to call myPO, so I gotta go.
They make it back to Knott'sLanding just in time for Gary to
take Olivia to herdaddy-daughter date.
Because of this scene, Idecided I was gonna go back and
pay a little bit more attentionto Abby throughout the rest of
(43:09):
this episode.
Gary goes into the house, heputs on a magician's costume
that Abby bought.
Olivia comes out.
She looks adorable in herlittle magic girl outfit.
She climbs in the back ofGary's coop because she knows
her mom is coming.
Naval and Lily Mae are fussingover how cute Olivia is, wishing
everybody good luck.
It's very much understood thatnobody but the daddies and the
(43:31):
daughters are invited, so youcan imagine everyone's surprised
when Abby comes tearing out ofthe house and she jumps in the
front seat with Gary and shegoes see Olivia, we're just like
a real family.
And Val said well, I thought itwas only daddies and daughters.
Abby says well, yeah, but I'mserving cake, so I get to go.
I'm not going to lie to you.
I'm not going to lie to you.
(43:54):
When I saw that, when I saw thetwo of them in the front seat,
my heart dropped.
I had like that.
You know that Dolby Digital,that sound.
My heart dropped.
I was like, oh no, oh no.
Gary, mind you, is not.
He's just kind of doing whathe's told.
He doesn't seem to care.
He's not really payingattention to Abby.
He's just kind of doing whathe's told.
He doesn't seem to care.
(44:15):
He's not really payingattention to Abby, he just looks
at Valene Baby.
We'll be home in a little bitlater.
No big deal.
Olivia doesn't seem to bebothered.
But it's just something aboutthe way Abby is looking in the
front.
She's way too giddy.
So it made me Now, lily Mae,as'm like okay, yeah, I had
(44:40):
forgotten that Abby was a littlebit sweet on him.
It seemed like they forgot,like that was a non-factor after
the whole Sid death and shealmost got Gary put in jail.
I hadn't thought about it againsince then.
But because of the scene I goback and I look at the scenes
that Abby's in a little morecarefully, because I had
originally thought that thewhole Olivia needs a daddy
(45:02):
daughter date with Gary was allVal's idea.
In my mind.
Val was like she's the one whobrought it up, she's the one who
insisted, she's the one whobrought it to Gary.
Gary was like no, she's likeshut up Gary, you're gonna do it
.
He ends up.
I didn't feel like Abby wasparticularly flirty when Gary
went over to practice withOlivia.
I didn't really think so.
I don't know.
(45:23):
I'm just telling you right nowI don't like it.
I don't know.
But I feel like if Abby decides, if she decides she wants him,
I guarantee you she's going toget him.
I don't like, like it and Ithink that'd be hella messy,
surely I you know what.
I can't even say not, surely?
Not because she is the bad girl.
I'm sorry if she thinks, if shewants it, I bet it's gonna
(45:46):
happen.
Plus, karen said something andthen Lily Mae said something.
Lily Mae is the the determiningfactor for me because, like I
said, that's country dumb.
She's not missing nothing.
She ain't missing a damn thing.
I don't like it, but we'll haveto see how that goes.
Man, a lot of times when I'mwatching these shows, I envy you
(46:07):
OGs, anybody who got to watchthis in real time.
I'm like man, what a time to bealive, allegedly.
But today I'm really, reallyhappy that I got to watch it the
way I did, because I can stop,I can rewind, I can revisit
these things.
I don't have to wait, you know,seven or eight months for the
summer to hit and me to watchthe repeats, hopefully, to
(46:29):
hopefully be home.
It's a lot of work.
There's a lot of work back inthe day, and I'm even more
pleased that Lily Mae had afeature episode.
She did not disappoint.
I am fully enjoying thisstoryline.
All right, guys, that's it.
That's all.
Thank you so much for joining metoday.
Remember to check the shownotes if you want to send me a
(46:49):
text.
I also want to say that if yousend me a text and I don't text
back, please don't take itpersonal.
Like you, I literally can't,but I will always acknowledge
you on the air and thank y'allfor being so wonderful.
I'm learning so much aboutthese shows, especially the OGs.
Y'all aren't giving anythingaway and that's the difference.
I'll say this, joseph, youasked how I'm avoiding all the
(47:14):
spoilers.
I think the trick, in additionto being diligent, in addition
to not going poking and lookingfor answers, the trick really is
you got to connect if you needto, and trust me, I get it,
which is why I'm on thismicrophone talking now.
You got to connect with realfans, because a real fan is not.
(47:35):
They don't want to spoilanything for you.
They want you to experience itlike they did.
That's the real trick.
In the meantime, in betweentimes, stay hydrated, stay
moisturized, mind your ownbusiness, unless, of course, a
little old lady and her stickyfingers geriatric boyfriend
steal money from your house andyou gotta get all of in their
(47:56):
business and keep all of yourdrama on TV.
(48:25):
Bye.
I forgot.
Lily Mae was a criminal Out onbail for shot in jail,
california dreamin' sheshouldn't have got on that bus
or crossed state lines.
I think that might be a felony,but maybe not in her case.
Ladies and gentlemen, boys andgirls, welcome and welcome back
to another fun-filled edition ofSoFloor.
I'm your host, jeb, viewing andreviewing the sopiest, suddiest
primetime storylines of 1982.
(00:22):
We're back on the West Coast,always doing the absolute most
in a dream come true for me.
So, whether you're new to thisor true to this, get back and
enjoy.
Tell the kids it's time to playoutside or, out of sight, tell
babe no questions, suggestionsor concerns.
For the next 25 to 35 minutes,everyone else in Earshot, cool,
quiet or Kicked Out are youronly options, because we are
(00:44):
watching our stories.
Ladies and gentlemen, boys andgirls, this is SoFluid.
Hello, gorgeous, welcome orwelcome back to another
fun-filled edition of SoFluid.
I hope your day is shaking upwell.
(01:13):
Mine is looking like it mightbe all right.
I am beyond excited to bringtoday's episode to you because
we get to once again be dazzledby the vocal stylings of Miss
Lily Mae.
What is Lily Mae's last name?
I don't know and I'm afraid tolook it up because I'm afraid of
spoilers.
Thank you for joining me today.
If you are new to this, welcomeIf you are true to this.
Thank you so much for all ofyour well wishes, thoughts and
(01:35):
behind the scenes tidbits.
I really really appreciate them, especially since I'm afraid of
spoilers, which brings me to afun piece of fan mail, a
correction and a little bit of aguess going forward.
So go ahead and grab yourselfsomething bubbly and bright,
settle in as we jump back intoKnot's Landing.
(01:56):
Season three, episode nine theRose and the Briar.
I feel like that's a book orsomething, the Raven and the
Briar, something like that.
I don't really know what thatis.
I think a briar is a garden.
I might look it up here in alittle bit, but in the meantime,
in between time, I am beyondexcited.
Ask children and you willreceive.
(02:16):
On the last episode, Iexpressed my absolute need for
more of this diamond in therough, miss lily may, and she
does not disappoint this episode.
We also get a whole nothercrossover.
I tell you what the soap operaworld is minuscule.
It is so tiny.
We have another crossovercharacter from dynasty of all
(02:38):
places, and he brought me morejoy than I deserve on this one
too.
So let let's jump into some fanmail.
I have a couple questions here.
All right, my first piece offan mail today is from Candice.
She says hey Jen, my name isCandice and I'm an OG who grew
up loving Falcon Crest.
I'm so excited, I was soexcited to come across your
(02:59):
podcast and I think you're doinga great job.
After the review of Body Rock, Igot a little bit curious about
your taste in films from thatgenre.
Are you familiar with any ofthe John Hughes films and, if so
, which ones?
Also, since you have a disdainfor the 80s, have you found
(03:20):
yourself watching any other 80sfilms since watching the soap
operas?
Thank you, candace.
Well, have I found myselfwatching any 80s films?
Here's the honest truth.
I went to look up John Hughesreal quick After I got that,
(03:41):
because it's like the namesounds familiar.
I just I couldn't put a face tothe name, and now I realize why
.
I guess he did all the sort ofteen films from the 80s.
Yes, I have seen several ofthose, but I have not seen them
recently Other than the BodyRock film.
I haven't really gone out of myway to watch any 80s films.
It's not a bad idea.
(04:02):
I'm kind of liking that idea ofmaybe watching some 80s teen
films, but I think I had apretty good start with those
movies.
So here's the thing about beingan 80s baby.
90s kids, kid I definitely haveseen, like Pretty in Pink.
I've watched the Breakfast Club.
I've probably seen theBreakfast Club a few times as an
(04:24):
adult, maybe within the lastfive years or so, but I can't
say I've fully seen 16 Candles.
I know I've seen big chunks ofit.
I think that is that where shemakes the dress.
And then I've seen the onewhere Molly Ringwald was
pregnant and she had, like thishaughty boyfriend and they were
kicked out for being pregnant,as far as I can tell, and they
(04:47):
showered in a room with no walls.
That's like the distinct memoryI have.
So, with that being said, Idon't know when I saw that I
definitely had to been.
I don't know if I was three orfour and just I have these
flashbacks of being in my aunt'sliving room.
I spent a lot of time watchingwhatever was on HBO.
I knew to cover my eyes duringthe dirty bits because you know,
(05:10):
this is the 80s, kids weren'tsuper precious then I either had
to go outside or cover my facewith a blanket if a kissing
scene or something came up and,sadly, sad to say, I still may
or may not fast forward throughthose parts.
Now, like as an adult, even ifthey're kissing a little bit too
(05:31):
long on TV, I'm like, oh, Ifeel weird, I feel like I need
to cover my eyes or do somethingelse.
That's so funny.
I'm totally not approved, Ipromise.
But no, yeah, I've definitelyseen those movies, as a matter
of fact.
Sadly, today, as I was recording, I saw the news about Val
Kilmer and just, oh, makes me so, so sad.
(05:53):
I hate to hear that.
He's one of the first movies Iremember he was in one of the
first movies I remember watching.
I definitely remember Lost Boysbecause I thought the one, the
blonde kid who turned out to beBill or Ted from Bill and Ted's
Excellent Adventure, was in itand I thought he was so cute.
I watched a movie with a guy inVal Kilmer about science.
(06:15):
Now, I could have sworn thiswas Sarah Jessica Parker's
little brother.
Don't ask me where I got thatidea.
I guess I saw an interview withher at some point where she
said she had a brother and in mymind, I just made that kid her
brother.
He's totally not her brother,but I remember Val Kilmer made a
house.
He didn't make it explode buthe like filled it with popcorn
(06:37):
and I remember being very, veryimpressed by that.
I don't even think I was inkindergarten yet, being a very
small kid thinking like, wow,this is what science is.
And you know what I've lovedscience ever since.
I'm going to have to do alittle tribute to him because I
have truly, truly enjoyed hiswork over the years.
(06:58):
I watched the documentary afterhe got sick and he had the
surgery and just what a oh Godmade me real, real, real sad.
But to answer your question, Ihave definitely seen a lot of
80s films.
As a matter of fact, I couldprobably put together a quick
little list and, for whateverreason, I really enjoyed those.
But, um, yeah, I hadn't goneback as an adult.
After watching the soap operasI feel like I've been more honed
(07:21):
in on the shows.
Hadn't really made me want towatch any film that I hadn't
already seen.
Next piece of fan mail comesfrom Joseph.
Joseph says hey, jet, I'm amillennial, also an 80s baby,
90s kid, and I'm watching theseshows for the first time and
having a great time.
And in parentheses, it says I'mnew to this.
(07:42):
Soon to be true to this.
I wanted to know how you avoidspoilers.
How have you been able to enjoythe show without running into
any obvious plot twists orgiveaways?
Joseph, I'm glad you asked.
It's a very good question and Ithink here's the thing With
(08:04):
these shows being, most of thembeing at least 40 years old, I
don't feel like they come up ingeneral conversation.
But you're right, the longer Iwatch them, the more like my
Google algorithm has changed alittle bit.
I've noticed the other day, Ithink Dallas just turned 47.
So if what I do?
If I see something that comesacross my timeline or comes
(08:25):
across my news feed, I will onlyread the title, because titles
very rarely give you any othersort of giveaway.
I think the only way to do itis you just can't go digging too
deeply a character, like if I'meulogizing someone whose
(08:46):
character died on the show, I'llgo to like Wikipedia and maybe
just read the first little bitor just go to their body of work
.
You got to skip over the biggerbits because they might give it
away.
You can do like read theirearly years, read things like
that.
I've been very, very lucky asfar as not having any major
spoilers spoiled for me.
Again, I don't go looking, Idon't know.
(09:08):
You just you gotta stayvigilant, my friend.
You, just you gotta, you gottastay vigilant.
That's all I can say,especially if you're not like
I'm reviewing them, so I have totake the pace a little bit
slower.
I think I would probably burnthrough these really quickly
otherwise.
Um, but I like the pace I'mgoing.
I think originally I wanted todo it every week so that it
(09:30):
would feel as authentic as itdid when they aired, and that's
been pretty good.
Like, I enjoy the buildup andthe anticipation but, yeah, be
very careful, don't put too manypeople on to it.
I've already told some friendsand then we wanted to talk about
it.
I'm like, listen, don't saynothing to me.
I can't, I can't hear that.
Don't talk to me, don't sayanything.
Also, seeing pictures of thecast has come up a little bit
(09:55):
more lately for me and, um, Ialways look, but I don't really
think a lot about it.
But now that I've seen um, Ithink it was like from season
two to three of Dynasty.
I'm like, oh okay, there weregiveaways there.
But if you don't know, you don'tknow.
Things are just going to goover your head.
You don't really know.
So, joseph, do your best to notgo digging too deeply and you
(10:19):
should be fine.
Only look at people afterthey've been kicked off the show
, hopefully.
And even there I start to get alittle bit nervous because my
own theory about soap poppers isthat nobody's ever really
really gone.
You never know if they're goingto pop up at another time.
So just be careful.
I don't know.
That's my only advice.
Be careful.
All right, if you have anyquestions, concerns or tips, you
(10:41):
can send us a text.
Just check the show notes ifyou're listening on your mobile
device, and you can always emailus at soplorepodcast at
gmailcom.
Let's get into Lily Mae, y'all.
Lily Mae oh my god.
For someone like me who's anelder millennial, it's not a far
concept for me to sort of graspthe thought that a parent could
be absolutely not obsessed withtheir child.
(11:03):
I think as the years have goneby, I'd say after the 2000s,
parents have sort of focused inon the kids a little bit more.
But I don't feel like I was thecenter of anyone's world
growing up, and that's not a badthing?
It's not a bad thing at all.
I had time to develop myself.
I had a lot of free time whereI had to discover things about
(11:26):
myself, and I don't think that'snecessarily a bad thing.
Lily Mae is a quintessential Iguess she is.
I don't know if she's silentgeneration.
I feel like she'd be a littlebit older than that.
But Lily Mae had a baby andwhat?
That's not her problem, that isthe baby's problem.
I gave birth to you.
(11:46):
What else do you want from me?
So at the the top of thisepisode we get to see Valene,
lily Mae and Karen in a littlecoop and Valene is on her way to
drop Lily Mae off, whose lastname is Clements.
I saw it in the opening credits.
I went back.
Lily Mae Clements isvolunteering her precious time
(12:08):
at an old folks home and she'sgoing on and on with Karen about
how important it is to spendtime with the elderly.
Such a good thing, it does sogood things, but my spirit is so
wonderful.
And then Karen is buying intothis and she says yeah, I was a
candy stripper myself.
Here's the thing Lily Mae ismagic, whether you want to
accept it or not.
The only person who seesthrough Lily Mae fully is Valene
(12:31):
, because she is blood of herblood, flesh of her flesh.
But I was fully convinced at thetop of this episode that Lily
Mae was running yet another scam.
I thought she was having Valenedrop her off at the old
people's home only so she couldskedaddle somewhere else and run
some sort of scam.
(12:52):
That's not the case.
She actually goes into the oldpeople's home and it's worth
noting that.
Oh gosh, if I had to guess,lily Mae's probably about 52
years old, which is not anywherenear being.
I mean, she's not an elderlywoman, she's an older woman.
She's definitely not geriatricin any way.
(13:13):
She's young, she's vibrant,she's having a good time and she
has washed the the foam curlsout of her hair.
I knew that was a wet set.
I know a foam roller set when Isee it.
She didn't commit to the permbecause Lily Mae Clements don't
commit to anything.
Mylene is all too happy to dropher off.
(13:34):
She tells Karen girl, oh my god, when I tell you the old people
home didn't come soon enough,baby girl, I can't take, I can't
stand this woman.
I am so proud to drop her off.
Any opportunity I get I'll doit again and again, praise the
Lord for the geriatrics.
I second that, valene.
(13:54):
I second that.
That's neither here nor there.
Because old people love a goodstory, they love company,
they're lonely.
You know what I'm saying, andLily Mae understands that.
One of the lessons I've learnedas I've grown older is that
sometimes people don't reallywant a solution.
Sometimes people just want anaudience, and that's exactly
(14:17):
what the elderly are offeringLily Mae Clements.
So she's in there during thebingo game and she is killing it
.
She is working the room like apro and she happens upon a
gentleman who's a little bitrough around the edges, wearing
a cap, and he says hey, I reallydig you.
And I'm looking at him.
I said wait a minute, hold up,wait a minute.
(14:37):
I know that ain't.
I know that ain't.
We're just gonna be a newseries.
I know that ain't Jack fromDynasty not Allegra's kidnapper,
baby, it is Allegra's kidnapper.
Immediately my heckles were up.
I was like, oh my God, lilyMaeve, I don't know nothing else
.
I know you're smarter than this.
(14:59):
But here's the thing when youwant an audience, maybe you
don't really care if thataudience is genuine or not.
If you want the applause,you're going to get the applause
.
So she and Jack from Dynastystart to exchange a few
pleasantries oh, you're cute,you're cute, we're good, we're
good.
Hey, why don't you come over tomy daughter's house for dinner?
(15:21):
They take a long walk in thepark and Lily Mae is all too
eager to say you know what?
I come for money.
Now Jack, whose name escapes meon this show, is like word you
come from money.
She said.
Well, I don't really come frommoney.
What happened was my daughtermarried one of the Texas Ewing's
.
So the implication is that sheis a wealthy woman well
(15:45):
unbeknownst to her, or or notreally, we'll get to that later.
Jack from Dynasty, the horsekidnapper, is like oh, let me
turn up my charm.
So there's this running jokethat the Rock is the exact same
person in every single movie.
He just takes off a jacket orputs on a jacket.
This is no different.
Jack from Dynasty, circa 1984,is Jackson on Knott's Landing
(16:11):
circa 1982.
He's still involved innefarious activities.
He's still a scoundrel, but youknow what he is.
He is taken aback by thedazzling personality of Miss
Lillian May Clements.
They fall in love over a bingogame.
They wax poetic about theirpast endeavors.
(16:32):
Apparently to her, mr JacksonMobley used to be a big time
music executive in Nashville,tennessee.
Now that is music to a personlike Lily Mae's ears, because
guess where she's been trying tohustle and make it big?
Nashville, tennessee, becauseshe is a country and western
star.
After a back and forth withmany, many tall tales, she
(16:55):
invites him over to dinner.
Now it occurred to me that Texasis a unique state.
It's unique because it's solarge.
There are four differentterrains in Texas, and Texas
likes to indoctrinate theirchildren while they're in school
with Texas history, whichincludes something called a tall
(17:16):
tale.
Now, we all understand thesestories aren't 100% factual, but
they are intended to give amoral or historical lesson, if
you're willing to accept it.
Tall tales are a vital part ofthe Texas backbone.
Now Ms DiMobile is an expert ontall tales.
(17:38):
Now here's a gotcha.
Gotcha, as I've learned aboutLily Mae, the more I see her,
the more I understand that thiswoman is what you would call
country dumb.
She's not missing a damn thing.
She is absorbing everything.
She understands the assignment,she knows what's going on at
all times.
So I fully didn't expect ahustler like Mobley to get one
(18:00):
over on her, but again, like Isaid at the top of the episode.
She doesn't want a solution, shewants an audience.
She is at the point in her lifewhere her daughter is telling
her to suck it up and get real.
But she needs someone tobelieve in her dreams.
So perhaps they have a mutualexchange here.
He knows he's full of ish.
He knows that she knows he'sfull of ish, but she indulges
(18:23):
him either way.
She knows that he knows she'sfull of ish, but he indulges her
either way.
Now is this simpatico or isthis a fiasco in the making?
Time will tell.
In the meantime, in betweentime, we have a subplot Little
Olivia.
Olivia has brought us at leastthree different storylines and
(18:46):
I've enjoyed each and every oneof them.
Apparently, olivia is back onthe cul-de-sac, she's on the
mend.
She's got a broken arm and sheseems to be healing well
physically, but mentally thingsaren't so great.
So Abby meets her at the busstop and Olivia jumps off the
bus.
There's another little girlwho's ahead of her with her
(19:06):
mother and she's like bye,olivia.
Olivia ignores her, so she saysit louder bye, olivia.
And Olivia looks over likethat's cute.
Abby says Olivia, what's wrong?
Olivia says you know what?
Sarah Ames is a giant baby.
It appears that Olivia has opsall over the elementary school.
(19:27):
She she can't even live herlife in peace.
All she wants to do is get aneducation, eat a little lunch,
have a little play date, but herops won't let her live.
Abby says girl, what's wrong?
Olivia says you know what?
Sarah Ames told the entireclass that I can't be at the
father-daughter dance because mydad is liable to kidnap me.
(19:48):
Ooh, I know we're supposed tohate Sarah Ames and Ada Bixby.
She called both of them bigbabies.
But I hear no lies.
Your father is liable to kidnapyou, which is why your mother
had to press charges, which iswhy he can't be at the
father-daughter dance.
That is at his own demise.
That is at his own hands.
(20:08):
I don't blame Abby for that atall.
It is what it is.
I stand with Abby.
But Abby starts to thinking like, damn, not having their dad in
their life is going to reallysuck.
I did not think of theimmediate consequences.
So she ends up having a briefconversation with Val about it
and Val's like, hey, why notbring Gary in?
And Gary can fill in, he can dowhatever he needs to do,
(20:29):
because Olivia's like yo, noteverybody has a daddy.
Some people have stepdaddies,some people have their mom's
boyfriend, other people arecoming I have no one and then
Sid's dead, so her uncle can'teven show up.
Her cousins are far too youngto represent her as, like, a
father figure.
So the only person left is Gary, according to Valene.
(20:50):
Now Abby's like are you sure?
Now I was thinking to myself.
I would double think that too,because yes, gary has a daughter
, but he's a crappy dad.
I almost lost my religion realquick.
He's never raised anybody.
Yeah, he might be, he's, he'sfine, he's okay, he's fine.
But is he good with children?
We'll never know, because he'sonly spent like 48 hours with
(21:13):
his own daughter.
I thought he was a poor choice.
I would have gone with maybe aKenny or a Richard, because
Kenny's on his new daddy daycarea bit.
But no, they decide that Gary.
So Darlene fills Gary and he'slike baby, why would you?
Why would you say that?
Why would I do that?
I don't want to go over thereand help that woman.
She's like please just do itfor Olivia.
(21:34):
You know, val loves the kids,she loves the cheering.
So he goes over and he andOlivia work out this beautiful
sort of magician shtick and it'sreally good.
And Abby sees it.
She's like, yeah, this isperfection.
I'm going to be honest, Iwatched this entire episode.
I didn't really think much of ituntil like halfway through
there's a scene where things aregoing on with Lily Mae that
(21:56):
require Gary's attention.
Abby comes into the filecabinet room.
She's talking to Gary Now hedoesn't see he's Gary's kind of
dense.
He's not really thinking aboutmuch, he's just handling the
task at hand.
And Abby's like well, are yougoing to be able to help my
daughter?
She's going to be sodisappointed.
(22:17):
You have to show up.
She's going to be sodisappointed.
And he's basically telling herlisten, I might need to take
care of some other businesswhich we will get into in a
second Right.
And I didn't think Abby was allthat I don't know.
I didn't think she was all thateager.
I wasn't really clocking much.
But I clocked Karen in thebackground.
So I'm like, oh, something'sgoing on here.
So Karen interrupts and thenshe's like am I interrupting
(22:41):
Abby's?
Not, abby don't care.
Y'all know Abby don't give adamn.
She gonna do what she needs todo and she moves on and it's at
this point I remember that Abbywas a little bit sweet on Gary
at some point but I thought itwas a moot point after the whole
FBI came in to investigate thestolen parts thing.
I don't really feel likethere's been much chemistry, so
(23:01):
much so that I've totallyforgotten about it.
We're eight episodes into seasonthree.
I didn't think anything of it.
But Karen in the background islike, uh, is everything cool?
And then she gives Gary awarning.
She's like listen, abby has away of making things happen,
something to that effect.
I'm not giving you verbatim,you'll have to watch to see what
she says exactly.
(23:23):
Okay, let's get back to Lily Mae.
So I want you to keep in mindthat Lily Mae is inviting this
man over.
Mowgli's going to come over andeat, but they have already had
a little lunchy poo in the parkand she tells him that, oh, she
and Valene were down home peoplebefore Valene married into the
Ewing family and Ewing money orno, valene needs her mother.
(23:46):
You know she's been a devotedmother.
Lily Mae is Been a devotedmother.
I even gave up my singing careerto come and help her.
That's wolf ticket number one.
Back in my day, or I guess backin my grandmother's day, she'd
say you're selling wolf ticketsLike you're lying, like the big
bad wolf trying to get in yourhouse.
(24:07):
You're selling wolf tickets.
So Lily Mae said yeah, I gaveup my singing career.
I'm a country and western star.
I gave up my whole career tocome help my daughter.
And he said no kidding, youknow, I used to be an artist
manager.
Matter of fact, I managed PatsyCline before she died.
She was going to come to myhouse.
No, a couple things happened tome.
(24:34):
When I watch this show I feelmy accidents start to kind of
seep through.
But I think it's because I'vespent so much time with old
people and I definitely knowsome old hustles, and that's
exactly the type of thingsomebody like that would say.
But granted, this is 1982,there's no internet, there's no.
Uh, I mean, you got to send aletter to get a lot of
information out to people.
Not everybody has a TV.
At this point he can prettymuch say whatever he wants.
(24:54):
Who's going to check him?
Who's going to pull the records?
So this starts making.
You know, lily May is like oh myGod, oh my God, oh, happy day,
I'm about to get paid, I'm aboutto be a superstar.
That's when she invites himover to dinner.
So when she comes bursting inthe house valine has just told
gary that he needs to helpolivia out and he's like man, I
ain't trying to be with them.
(25:14):
Kids, go tell her somebody else, get somebody else to do it.
She's like no, just do it,figure it out.
Well, lily may comes in andhe's like hey, lily, may you
look good, he likes browling herup and damn it if I don't like
him riling her up a little bit.
So Lily Mae's like baby, can Ihelp?
(25:35):
Val's like no, you could.
She don't want her in herkitchen.
Girl, just, I didn't even knowyou was home.
No, well, listen, I got companycoming over.
He's an artist manager.
He's gonna help me in my career.
And Val's like I know you lying.
Why didn know you lying?
Why didn't you call mama?
Why didn't you tell me?
Well, you weren't here when Igot home.
And Valene's like because I wasout buying dinner for three
(25:58):
people.
What am I going to do with afourth person?
Well, we're having chickenfricassee at fricassee fricassee
, something like that.
And Valene's like yeah, I ampreparing chicken fricassee,
lily.
I am preparing chickenfricassee.
Lily Mae's like well, just addsome more rice in, it'll be fine
.
He's coming over anyway.
Oh, and also follow my lead.
Whatever I say, just nod andagree.
So Eveline already knows it'sgoing to be some bull.
(26:19):
And my heart, I'm having a goodtime.
But Val is like, oh my God,gary, gary, you better get your
mother-in-law, sweet jesus, youbetter get this woman.
You better get her before I gether.
Lily may is tap dancing andfiddle deeing all over valine's
(26:40):
last nerve.
So now she's got to scrambleand stretch out this meal.
That really should be for twopeople, but mama is a squatter.
Now it's gonna have to be forfour.
This is amazing.
So they sit down to eat.
Gary, valine, jackson mogley andloretta lend me a dollar
(27:00):
herself.
And jackson mogley startstelling this tale about how,
when he was a kid, he was on hisuncle's farm and this chicken
laid these glowing, dark eggs.
They were so bright, so vibrant, that they used those eggs to
light up the house for the restof the summer.
Now Gary cackles at this.
He's a Texan.
He's like that is the tallesttail I've ever heard.
And Jackson's like no, it ain't.
(27:21):
This is the honest to God'struth.
But it's all in fun.
Everybody knows he's, you know,looks like oh my gosh.
She's just rubbing her headlike oh my god, how did I end up
with two of these people?
And she's right, lily Mae hadsaid at some point she's like I
knew I felt a kindred spiritbecause he told her he was a an
artist manager or something.
But the truth is it takes oneto know one, a hustler, that is.
(27:44):
So Val tells Gary hey, it's timeto get over, go over and help
Olivia with her project.
She thinks she's going to go inthe kitchen and wash dishes and
then just sort of slip into bed.
Lily Mae has other plans.
Oh, valene, thank you so muchfor helping me make dinner.
Wolf ticket number three.
And Val looks like girl, youdon't, okay, yeah, yeah, I
(28:08):
helped, something like that.
Lily Mae says put down themdishes, bow, come, come in the
living room with mr mogli andlisten to me sing.
I can tell in that moment shewould have.
Oh god, she wishes she was garyso bad.
So they go in the living roomand you know exactly what song
she sings.
The prettiest thing I ever didsee was the clouds drifting high
(28:33):
in the pine country.
That's my jam.
I don't care what anybody says,I love it, I love it.
Once the guy leaves, valene islike mama, please that man.
Everything he said was a lie.
She's a little girl.
You just don't understand men.
(28:54):
You don't understand a man likehim.
He's a visionary.
You're not a visionary like meand him you don't understand.
Side note, though, um valine iswearing this outfit.
It's like these gray pants anda not so much a suit jacket,
maybe sort of a members onlyjacket, but it's cut to fit a
woman.
It's a very feminine cut jacket.
It's like a windbreakermaterial.
I think I love it.
(29:16):
I've never seen anything likeit.
Now, granted, I can't hear theswish, swish, swish when she
walks.
So maybe it's not windbreakermaterial, but it is cute, cute,
cute.
Do yourself a favor and watchthis episode.
It is so cute, okay.
So Lily Mae and Mr Mosleycontinue to get along.
They get along so much thatthey are asked to babysit Ginger
(29:37):
and Kenny's baby while they goout and have themselves a good
time.
Now Ginger can't wait to dropthis crying baby, baby in two
names.
Lily Mae comes over and bringsMosley.
Now Lily Mae goes in thekitchen immediately.
You can tell this is the typeof woman she is.
Ginger and Kenny say helpyourself to whatever, we'll be
back early.
Yes, people mean that, but theyalso don't mean like, don't go
(29:58):
crazy.
Obviously, restrain yourself.
Lily Mae immediately goes to thekitchen and starts to prepare
some snacks.
So let me raid thisrefrigerator real quick, mr
Mosley.
Well, I guess the sticky fingerspirit was upon Mr Mosley,
because he immediately startssnooping around like hey, this
place is pretty nice.
He opens a coffee can behindthe couch and there's some money
(30:20):
in it.
Now, to my naked eye, I sawfive.
I'm thinking this is probably Idon't know probably $25 at most
, it's not.
He quickly stuffs it away inhis pocket and by the time Lily
Mae returns from her cabinet,reading the cheese tray, jackson
Mowgli has a bright idea.
(30:41):
Say Lily Mae, I know we've onlyknown each other 14 minutes.
Why don't we go get married,married?
Why would I get married?
Yeah, we're not getting anyyounger.
Let's go to Vegas, then we'llgo on to Nashville and make you
a superstar.
This little bit of money in hispocket has changed everything
for him.
Yeah, baby, I got money.
Now, he didn't tell her that.
Let me be very clear.
(31:01):
She doesn't know he took anymoney.
So the next day she quietlypacks up some clothes, meets him
at the bus stop and they takethe longest Greyhound bus ride
in the history of history to LasVegas.
Now, I didn't think that wasthat hard to get to Vegas.
I feel like if you're anywherein the Southwest you can fly
pretty easily, even if you rodea bus.
(31:21):
I don't think it will be allday and all night.
So while Lily Mae is sitting inher seat serenading small
children with her, all her songsare about dying or death or
something.
As she serenades the childrenon the bus, tell me why Jackson
Mowgli is in the back back ofthe bus slinging dice.
(31:43):
What is that crap?
Snake eyes, whatever that gameis.
He's rolling the dice.
He rolls the dice for theentire duration of this trip, so
much so that by the time theyget to Vegas he's running low on
cash.
Let's go back to the cul-de-sac, because we've got to tie all
this together.
So Lily Mae didn't tell Valeneanything.
So Valene is in the kitchenpreparing dinner for three.
(32:03):
Gary comes home and he's likehey, where's your mama?
Because I don't know.
I see my mama all day.
Oh, so she's not here.
No, she's not here.
So he's like hey, uh, you knowwhat I'm saying.
You know.
I said I've been working out.
Why don't we go upstairs andtake a nap.
Wink, wink, gary, I can't, I'mcooking.
Well, he starts, you know hestarts.
(32:26):
Um, he knows how to use hishands or whatever.
He's caressing her and beforeyou know it, she's like you know
what the hell with this chicken?
Come on, gary.
Gary has been relatively quietthis entire season, but on this
show, on this episode, we seethe triumphant return of the
(32:48):
baby blue boy shorts, the teeny,tiny shorts he likes to sleep
in.
This man comes out of thebathroom with a robe, stands in
front of the bed and disrobes.
Now I would think, okay, we'renot going to go there In your
own house.
Why would you bother putting ona robe?
Maybe it's to dry off, maybenot, I don't know.
He wants the audience toremember that he is fine, fine,
okay.
Looks like he shaved his chesta little bit.
(33:13):
He got a little tan.
He makes sure to flex when hegets in the bed, even turns over
.
This is the night previous.
He turns over on the side.
Hey, valine, could you rub myarm?
Well, this gives him theopportunity to hoist his head up
with his arm and flex, so wecan see.
Oh, we, we get it, gary, youfine, fine.
We get it, gary, you fine, fine, we get it.
Once they get through taking anap, ow, they're eating dinner.
(33:34):
And he's like damn Val, thischicken is dry, she goes.
Well, you know, it was in theoven an extra 30 minutes, he's
all.
Yeah, that's right, man, I getit.
I get it, you're hot, gary, weget it.
So while they were doing thehalf hour horizontal hustle,
kenny also steps out of theshower at his house.
(33:54):
This is now.
This is day of.
This is the day that lily mayhas got on the bus.
He steps out of his shower andhe says hey, ginger, you got any
money.
I didn't get to stop by thebank today.
She's busy trying to get abigger booty for the summer,
doing all sorts of weird likeleg movements and stuff to stack
the thing up.
She's busy trying to get abigger booty for the summer,
doing all sorts of weird, likeleg movements and stuff to stack
the thing up.
She's like uh, no, why don'tyou just take it from our
(34:15):
emergency?
Can they have a little banterback and forth?
But if we keep taking moneywe'll never have any.
She goes.
I put thirty dollars in thereyesterday, it's fine.
So he goes to the can and it'sempty, empty.
He goes no, you must have usedit on something.
No, she.
She says no, no, no, Idefinitely put $30 in there
yesterday.
It can't be gone.
The only people who were herewere, and she doesn't say it.
(34:36):
She's like no, it couldn't havebeen Lily Mae, she's too nice
to do something like that.
Kenny said well, you remembershe did steal that scarf.
And Ginger's like damn, yeah,she did.
Let the record reflect.
According to lily may, shedidn't steal the scarf.
She simply took it from itslocation inside the store,
(34:57):
stuffed it within her breastpocket, walked outside so she
could see it in the light of day, never mind the big picture
window.
Well, kenny's, like you know, Idon't think lily may would have
taken the money, but what aboutthat weirdo she was with?
And then she said I don't know,I don't think Lily Mae would
have taken the money, but whatabout that weirdo she was with?
And then she said I don't know,I don't know him like that.
Maybe, maybe not.
So they go over to Gary andValene's.
Kenny does, and he's like hey,what do you know about that guy
(35:19):
that's dating Lily Mae?
Valene hears this, she goeswell, I don't know much about
him.
Kenny explains the situation.
She's like oh mama, all day Idon't know where they're at.
Gary had driven Mobley home, orat least he thought he did.
So Valene suggests that they goover to Mobley's house to maybe
just talk to him, see if LilyMae is over there.
Now the truth of the matter isthat Gary did drop him off at a
(35:43):
place, but Mobley never actuallywalked inside.
It wasn't his real house.
So they really are none thewiser about where he lives.
At one point Val was reallyconcerned that he might live in
a scatheed neighborhood.
Does he have a nice house?
Did you meet his son and such?
And Gary's just kind ofsniggling the whole time.
Gary's doing whatever.
He's told this whole episode.
He doesn't really talk a lot,unless he's trying to get Valene
in the sack and remind the restof the audience that he's fine,
(36:05):
fine.
So he ends up going over to thehouse with Kenny and of course
they're not there.
Now Val's getting worried.
Kenny suggests that they callthe police.
Val's like I can't, mama's onparole.
I forgot Lily Mae was acriminal Out on bail for shot in
jail California, dreaming sheshouldn't have got on that bus
(36:27):
or crossed state lines.
I think that might be a felony,but maybe not in her case.
So eventually Lily Mae doescall and Valene is like Mama,
where are you?
I can't believe you left allday and didn't say nothing.
Lily Mae's like don't worryabout that.
Now I'm telling you where I'mat.
I'm at the Alhambra Hotel inLas Vegas.
I'm about to marry.
Mr Mowgli.
Val's like what, gary?
We got to go.
(36:48):
They hang up, they get in thecar and they make it to Vegas in
15 minutes.
Now this, of course, puts adamper on the Olivia magic show
plans.
Gary briefly explains as he andVal are hustling out of the
house to Abby Listen, we got togo take care of something with
Lily Mae.
We'll be back as soon as we can.
Are you going to make the show?
I don't know.
We'll be back as soon as we can.
So meanwhile in Vegas, mowgli'sat the slot machine just
(37:12):
dropping quarter after quarterafter quarter, losing and losing
, and losing.
Lily Mae goes over to him andsays hey, honey, let's go ahead
and check in.
I need to freshen up.
He goes oh no, honey, I'd liketo do a little bit more gambling
.
If you don't mind, we'll go upin a minute.
She's like no, no, I need tofreshen up.
(37:35):
Let's go up now, let's go aheadand check in.
It was okay.
Well, we'll have to use yourcredit card because they don't
take cash here.
She's like credit card.
Yeah, your your credit card,you're rich, you ain't, don't?
You have a credit card?
Maybe?
No, like I said before, I don't.
I don't have money like that.
Now here's a funny part.
She did explain to him when sheinitially met him that she and
that Valene were down home folks.
Valene married into the TexasEwing's.
(37:57):
She never said she was rich,but it was an assumption.
He brings up her wealth one moretime and she doesn't say
anything.
She doesn't correct him and sayhey, no, no, no, I don't have
money like that.
It's just, you know, she'sattached, my daughter is to this
wealthy oil family.
Well, lily Mae said no, sir, Idon't have no credit card.
Let me just, I might as welltell you this I'm as poor as a
(38:18):
church mouse.
I don't have any money.
He goes well, I might as welltell you this I don't have any
money, basically the money I hadI've lost in the back of the
bus.
And she goes oh, you're somegambler.
Then like, yeah, I lied to youabout that.
I don't really have no money.
So Lily Mae doesn't take itpersonal.
She busts out laughing likewell, hell, I was lying to
(38:39):
impress you.
I thought you were gonnaelevate my career.
I lied about everything.
And he goes hell, I lied too.
Matter of fact, I've never beena music producer in my life.
Well, they get a good oldraucous laugh out of this.
I'm like wow, lily Mae isunfadable.
This is where this woman turnslemons into organic deep tissue
(39:01):
peel.
She's that good.
This is why I know this womanis gonna be all right.
My mom used to have this thinglike if you did something dumb,
she'd be like you ought to beshocked, shamed and embarrassed.
Lily Mae is neither shocked,nor is she shamed, nor is she
embarrassed about anything.
So she's like hey, way I see it, jackson, you're a liar, I'm a
(39:25):
liar, I've been spinning talltales.
You're a silver tongue devil.
Both.
Both of us are old.
Both of us have clearly gottenaway with this for decades.
Why don't we combine forces andjust lean into our natural
gifts?
Ie lying and he's like that's ahell of an idea, let's do it.
So she coaches him on what tosay.
She's like I want to sing atthe sidewinder, I'm going to sit
(39:47):
out here on this bench.
I, winder, I'm going to sit outhere on this bench.
I want you to go inside and doexactly as I say.
And I tell you what.
You shouldn't be proud of aliar, but I was dang proud of
him.
Jackson Mowgli gets in front ofthe I guess, the owner of the
hotel, and he's like hey, youreally need to hear my woman,
lily Mae.
She is an incredible, justdiamond in the rough type of
(40:09):
talent.
She really needs to sing herown lounge.
And it was like man, don'tnobody want to hear nobody's
grandma sing, mogul?
He says no, you don'tunderstand.
Not only is she incrediblytalented, but we've been married
30 years and she's got aterminal illness.
She don't have much longer.
It is her dream to sing in thisfine hotel and I really think
your patrons will enjoy that.
You're a married man, right?
And the owner's like yeah, I amhe.
(40:31):
Well, wouldn't you do justanything and I mean absolutely
anything to make your wife'sdream come true?
Sold, before you know it, lilyMae, lily Mae has her first
Vegas residency.
Even if it is for one dayduring happy hour, don't matter,
she's in there now, baby, she'sin there.
You can't tell her nothing.
I guess if you stay ready youdon't have to get ready because
(40:54):
it takes no time at all for LilyMae to put on a three-tier puff
sleeve, sweetheart necklineprairie dress and that wig that
what's her name?
Velma?
Do y'all remember that showMama's Family, the lady who was
(41:14):
the son's wife?
What was his name?
Vance, I get that and rebamixed up.
Anyway, she used to have thisreally curly sort of mulledy
long hairdo.
Look like lily may.
Stacked three church ladygrandma wigs on top of each
other.
But she looked cute, don't gether twisted.
She was in there when I tellyou what she put on a great show
.
Everybody seemed to reallyreally be into it.
(41:36):
Gary and val make it right aboutthe time she lands on stage,
right?
I guess val just knew my mamahas slithered her way into the
sidewinder.
She probably told gary gary,look for a crowd of people
listening to mama sing about thedead hollows or whatever.
So they get into the lounge andLily Mae is killing it.
She's at the final few notes ofher song and, for whatever
(41:58):
reason, val is not embarrassedby this song.
She doesn't look mortified,she's actually feeling it.
There's a drunk man shouting atthe top of his lung he needs his
three dollar drink ticket.
Hey, shut up, shut up, sit down.
That's my mom up there sayingit Be quiet.
He obliges her.
He doesn't try to fight her.
He's like oh okay, my bad,sorry.
(42:22):
Well, right about this time MrMosley decides it's time for him
to skedaddle into the wind.
Once Lily Mae gets off stage,she chases them down outside and
he says you know what, honey,the best thing in your life will
be just to leave me.
By the way, I stole $200 fromyour neighbor, so you know I got
to be on the run.
Lily Mae's probably thinkingwell, hell, I guess I can pay
(42:47):
for that out of my residencymoney, but I also should
probably get back to California.
I'm definitely on parole and Idon't want Valene to call my PO,
so I got to go.
I don't want Valene to call myPO, so I gotta go.
They make it back to Knott'sLanding just in time for Gary to
take Olivia to herdaddy-daughter date.
Because of this scene, Idecided I was gonna go back and
pay a little bit more attentionto Abby throughout the rest of
(43:09):
this episode.
Gary goes into the house, heputs on a magician's costume
that Abby bought.
Olivia comes out.
She looks adorable in herlittle magic girl outfit.
She climbs in the back ofGary's coop because she knows
her mom is coming.
Naval and Lily Mae are fussingover how cute Olivia is, wishing
everybody good luck.
It's very much understood thatnobody but the daddies and the
(43:31):
daughters are invited, so youcan imagine everyone's surprised
when Abby comes tearing out ofthe house and she jumps in the
front seat with Gary and shegoes see Olivia, we're just like
a real family.
And Val said well, I thought itwas only daddies and daughters.
Abby says well, yeah, but I'mserving cake, so I get to go.
I'm not going to lie to you.
I'm not going to lie to you.
(43:54):
When I saw that, when I saw thetwo of them in the front seat,
my heart dropped.
I had like that.
You know that Dolby Digital,that sound.
My heart dropped.
I was like, oh no, oh no.
Gary, mind you, is not.
He's just kind of doing whathe's told.
He doesn't seem to care.
He's not really payingattention to Abby.
He's just kind of doing whathe's told.
He doesn't seem to care.
(44:15):
He's not really payingattention to Abby, he just looks
at Valene Baby.
We'll be home in a little bitlater.
No big deal.
Olivia doesn't seem to bebothered.
But it's just something aboutthe way Abby is looking in the
front.
She's way too giddy.
So it made me Now, lily Mae,as'm like okay, yeah, I had
(44:40):
forgotten that Abby was a littlebit sweet on him.
It seemed like they forgot,like that was a non-factor after
the whole Sid death and shealmost got Gary put in jail.
I hadn't thought about it againsince then.
But because of the scene I goback and I look at the scenes
that Abby's in a little morecarefully, because I had
originally thought that thewhole Olivia needs a daddy
(45:02):
daughter date with Gary was allVal's idea.
In my mind.
Val was like she's the one whobrought it up, she's the one who
insisted, she's the one whobrought it to Gary.
Gary was like no, she's likeshut up Gary, you're gonna do it
.
He ends up.
I didn't feel like Abby wasparticularly flirty when Gary
went over to practice withOlivia.
I didn't really think so.
I don't know.
(45:23):
I'm just telling you right nowI don't like it.
I don't know.
But I feel like if Abby decides, if she decides she wants him,
I guarantee you she's going toget him.
I don't like, like it and Ithink that'd be hella messy,
surely I you know what.
I can't even say not, surely?
Not because she is the bad girl.
I'm sorry if she thinks, if shewants it, I bet it's gonna
(45:46):
happen.
Plus, karen said something andthen Lily Mae said something.
Lily Mae is the the determiningfactor for me because, like I
said, that's country dumb.
She's not missing nothing.
She ain't missing a damn thing.
I don't like it, but we'll haveto see how that goes.
Man, a lot of times when I'mwatching these shows, I envy you
(46:07):
OGs, anybody who got to watchthis in real time.
I'm like man, what a time to bealive, allegedly.
But today I'm really, reallyhappy that I got to watch it the
way I did, because I can stop,I can rewind, I can revisit
these things.
I don't have to wait, you know,seven or eight months for the
summer to hit and me to watchthe repeats, hopefully, to
(46:29):
hopefully be home.
It's a lot of work.
There's a lot of work back inthe day, and I'm even more
pleased that Lily Mae had afeature episode.
She did not disappoint.
I am fully enjoying thisstoryline.
All right, guys, that's it.
That's all.
Thank you so much for joining metoday.
Remember to check the shownotes if you want to send me a
(46:49):
text.
I also want to say that if yousend me a text and I don't text
back, please don't take itpersonal.
Like you, I literally can't,but I will always acknowledge
you on the air and thank y'allfor being so wonderful.
I'm learning so much aboutthese shows, especially the OGs.
Y'all aren't giving anythingaway and that's the difference.
I'll say this, joseph, youasked how I'm avoiding all the
(47:14):
spoilers.
I think the trick, in additionto being diligent, in addition
to not going poking and lookingfor answers, the trick really is
you got to connect if you needto, and trust me, I get it,
which is why I'm on thismicrophone talking now.
You got to connect with realfans, because a real fan is not.
(47:35):
They don't want to spoilanything for you.
They want you to experience itlike they did.
That's the real trick.
In the meantime, in betweentimes, stay hydrated, stay
moisturized, mind your ownbusiness, unless, of course, a
little old lady and her stickyfingers geriatric boyfriend
steal money from your house andyou gotta get all of in their
(47:56):
business and keep all of yourdrama on TV.
(48:25):
Bye.
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