June 4, 2025 • 55 mins
Ever wondered what it's like to walk into a soap opera halfway through? "The Voice, Part Two" drops us into the glittering, treacherous world of Denver's elite, where business deals and bedroom affairs are equally cutthroat.<br><br>Blake Carrington finds himself in Hong Kong closing a major oil deal when he uncovers Tracy's betrayal – she's been working with his rival all along. The confrontation that follows reveals Blake's sharp business instincts and unwavering boundaries. Meanwhile, Alexis springs into action upon learning of Blake's deal, whisking her questionably effective bodyguard Mark Jennings to Hong Kong for a counter-offensive. Their dynamic raises fascinating questions: Is Mark the ultimate kept man or simply the worst employee in Denver?<br><br>Back in Denver, psychological drama unfolds as Claudia receives mysterious phone calls that sound eerily like her dead husband Matthew. The torment leaves her increasingly unhinged while those around her grow concerned. Simultaneously, Kirby and Adam make a chilling journey to North Dakota, where they discover her institutionalized mother was released only to die shortly after. The cemetery scene delivers gothic soap opera perfection – complete with a mysterious woman bearing tales of a ragdoll named after Kirby.<br><br>Throughout the episode, Dynasty masterfully demonstrates why it defined 80s primetime television. The show effortlessly balances high-stakes business dealings with intensely personal consequences, all while characters parade through lavish settings in spectacular fashions (except for poor Kirby, who appears to have wandered in from another dimension in sepia-toned prairie garb).<br><br>Whether you're a longtime Dynasty devotee or discovering this golden age gem for the first time, join us as we analyze every shoulder pad, side-eye, and corporate takeover. Text us your theories about who's really tormenting Claudia or share your thoughts on the revolving door of Carrington marriages using the link in our show notes!
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
in and out of many a woman's bedroom, probably many a
married woman's bedroom.
So he's quite light on his feet.
I didn't hear anything.
His thick celic mustache ismasking his chewing sounds.
I don't know what she's talkingabout, but, ladies and gentlemen
, boys and girls, welcome andwelcome back to so plory, the
official gathering place fornewbies, novices and og diehard
fans of the golden age ofprimetime.
(00:21):
I'm your host, jeff, viewingand reviewing one of the golden
age of primetime.
I'm your host, jeb, viewing andreviewing one of the stopiest,
subdiest primetime storylines of1984 or 85.
So, whether you're new to thisor true to this, sit back and
enjoy.
Tell the kids it's time to playoutside or out of sight, tell
babe, no questions, suggestionsor concerns for the next 25 to
35 minutes.
(00:41):
Everyone else in Airshot, cool,quiet or kicked all the way out
.
I'm not playing with y'alltoday.
We are watching our stories.
Ladies and gentlemen, boys andgirls, this is Soap Lore.
(01:02):
Hello, gorgeous, welcome back.
Party people with people whoparty to another fun build
edition of SoFloor.
We're in Denver today.
Put on your finest sateen robe,your comfiest socks or, if
you're driving baby up the hill,yeah, I guess get comfortable.
I don't really know what totell you I know some cars have
(01:24):
massage sheets, massage seats.
Now, quite frankly, that's.
That's baby y'all to hear about.
Every other day they play jetis once again in a ditch
somewhere.
Driving off the side of the roadwas just luxe, luxury.
I would work from my car, Ireally would.
(01:45):
First time I got cooling seats,baby, you couldn't tell me
nothing, especially growing upas a little kid in West Texas.
God, the summers were so hot,you know you could have window
tinting, but the fats arerelevant.
It's going to the sun's goingto blaze through there.
Cars are sitting outside forhours and hours at a time, at a
whopping 100, probably 25 in thecar.
(02:07):
Oh my gosh, you can always finda desert kid.
All desert kids have at leastone seat belt burn when the
metal catches you at the wrongspot, like even if you had cloth
seats.
They were hot.
But man, those leather seats,girl, we used to bring towels
out to the car to sit down.
Oh, rough times, but we'regonna.
(02:29):
We're gonna float into someeasy times.
Today we're also going to jumpinto a little bit of fan mail.
So join me for season four,episode 21, dynasty, the voice,
part two.
This family was hilarious.
All she says at the beginningis sparkling water.
Ew, what is your favoritebubbly and bright beverage?
(02:54):
Do you drink champagne?
Love the show.
I am a Dallas fan.
I remember watching this withmy grandma and her neighbor.
Thank you so much, kima.
I'm so glad that you wereenjoying the show.
That's so cool that you got towatch it.
I'm a little bit envious.
So, yeah, favorite bubbly,bright beverage it is sparkling
(03:16):
water.
And I tell you what you justgot to choke it down.
I don't want soda, so I decidedto just try something else.
I wanted the effect that itgave.
Like I felt like it gives me alittle pick me up in the middle
of the day.
I love the sound of a canopening.
Prefer cans over plasticbottles.
Drink anything out of a glassbottle, but yeah, I prefer
sparkling water.
(03:37):
I would just advise hey, try it.
Buy yourself a little six packin the can, drink it for like
two days and I promise youyou'll start to be like okay,
this isn't bad, it's actuallyreally good.
I don't really enjoy champagne.
However, in all fairness, Iprobably have only had champagne
on New Year's Eve and NewYear's Day, so, uh, and I'm sure
(03:58):
it was just whatever wasavailable at the grocery store,
much like wine.
I'm not nearly as versed inthat, but I'm willing to try it.
My favorite beverage ever isjust water.
My favorite bubbly beveragewould be sparkling water and
although I don't drink champagne, I do drink beer from time to
time.
I would say, like a MichelobUltra, every blue moon.
(04:21):
Ooh, speaking of one time, somefriends and I went to this bar.
I can't remember what we werecelebrating, but I had a blue
moon with her, which is a brandI'm assuming it's national.
I don't think I've ever seenany commercials, but they serve
it with an orange wedge.
Very delicious if you're intothat.
But yeah, beer is one of thosethings.
Every literal blue moon, onceevery couple of years.
(04:44):
Something all right, girl.
Well, thank you for writing in.
You guys can always reach outto me.
On the show notes there shouldbe a link to send us a text.
I cannot respond back to you ina text, but I will respond back
to you in an email.
You can reach out to us at soaplore podcast at gmail.
S-o-a-p-l-o-r-e-p-o-d-c-a-s-tat gmailcom.
(05:07):
Love hearing from you.
And uh, unfortunately we're notwatching Dallas today, but we
are jumping back into Dynastyand I had a time with this one.
We got to get to the bottom ofthe Mark Jennings thing.
I got to get over my disgustfor all Carrington couples.
And what's going on with Kirby?
I think Kirby pissed offsomeone in the wardrobe
(05:30):
department.
Let's jump into the Voice, part2.
Sometimes when I'm watchingDynasty I forget that this is
about a business.
It's about a family, but it'salso about the business.
I just forget that sometimesbecause there is oh so much
pleasure Hard to separate thetwo.
I guess the two aren't alwaysmutually exclusive.
(05:51):
You can find a lot of pleasurein the business you do, but
that's not what we're talkingabout.
That's not what me and you aretalking about.
That's not what Blake's talkingabout either.
So the show opens up with Blakein Hong Kong.
He's sitting at his desk whenin walks, ahmed Rashida, rashida
Med.
If you are a recent soap fiendlike myself, you'll remember him
from Falcon Crust.
That's Julia's original husbandwho ran off on her turned back
(06:15):
up because he needed something.
She ran off to San Franciscothinking they were going to
rekindle something.
You know she thought he wantedthat old thing back.
Unfortunately he had an entireother family then she almost got
ran through by some sailors.
But her son came through andbeat everybody down.
It was a whole mess.
Now he's back to being AhmedRashid or Rashid Ahmed, over on
(06:35):
Dynasty, if that doesn't soundlike a child support town
skipping baby daddy me, I don'tknow what does.
So air quotes on me, excuse me.
Rashid comes into Blake'sgorgeous penthouse and he's like
oh my God you're.
I'm not even going to do theaccent because it's
disrespectful regardless.
(06:56):
I don't know who he's supposedto be.
I don't know what part ofSoutheast Asia, what that means,
that could be anywhere, but heis.
Why is he representing thatgovernment in Hong Kong?
Now that I think about it, Iguess that will be revealed in
time.
It wasn't revealed on thisepisode.
All he wants to talk about isthose dames.
Man, your secretary's hot Ooh,and you married that baddie of a
(07:17):
wife Ooh, and you had thatbaddie of an ex-wife.
Blake's just trying to read afew papers.
He's like look, look, rashid, Idon't like you, you don't like
me.
We're not here to talk aboutcatch and tail.
You're here to represent yourgovernment.
I'm here to represent mygovernment, both of them very
ambiguously.
By the way, we don't know whatparty Blake is representing.
Some piece of the governmentreached out to him to represent
(07:39):
the party.
Rashid is representing thatgovernment and we'll keep it
there.
She's like okay, you right, youright, let me calm down.
Blake then calls his lady tocheck up on her.
You know, crystal is exactly 14and a half seconds pregnant, so
she is laying down in bed inher silk robe with her doily
sleeves.
It's actually a really cutegown.
(08:00):
Alexis is wearing somethingvery similar in the next couple
of scenes, but they're justchatting about what's going to
happen.
He's telling her to make sureshe watches him on the news,
make sure she gets enough rest.
She's like yeah, you too.
Congratulations, blake, this isso wonderful.
I'm glad you're having a goodtime.
I'm glad everything's goingsmoothly Well.
There's a knock at the door.
The bellboy comes in andthey're like hey, here's your
(08:33):
luggage that was lost.
Blake's like thank you, itseems to be an airline bag, like
a nylon bag that they give allthe passengers, and a briefcase.
So once he hangs up withCrystal, he goes over to open
the nylon bag, the airline bag,and the first thing that comes
out is their hair dryer.
Judging by Blake's impeccablycoiffed hair, I didn't think
that was unusual.
I thought he was just going tounpack a bag and the next thing
that comes out is their hairdryer.
Judging by Blake's impeccablycoiffed hair, I didn't think
that was unusual.
I thought he was just going tounpack a bag and the next thing
you know, he pulls out a pictureof Tracy and Eric Grayson.
Now, this is odd, because hedidn't know that they knew each
(08:55):
other.
Remember Now why this woman, whodoesn't know how to separate
business and pleasure, wouldwalk around with physical
photographic evidence in her bag.
I'm sure I don't know, butBlake sees it.
He quickly understands what'sgoing on here.
Like, wait a minute.
So she been knew him because inthe picture she said and all in
(09:16):
his life, this is an, this is agood picture, and the fact that
she's saving it means something.
So right about.
Then Tracy comes knocking atthe door and she's going on and
on about how oh my gosh, blake,we have the same bag.
I'm such a clutch and it's afunny thing that happens.
I'm sure I've already told thestory, but I'm going to tell it
again for the newest people.
(09:38):
Once upon a time I was workingat this department store and a
friend that I had known.
I'd worked with her previouslywhen we were teenagers, like at
the movies.
She came in and she had herbaby.
So I'm like, oh my gosh, we'rejust chatting, everything's good
.
Oh my gosh, girl that well,there's this girl that I worked
with.
What, what can I say?
Let's call her Annie.
(10:00):
Annie is walking around lookingat my friend as my friend is
shopping.
I'm none the wiser, just kindof having a good time doing
whatever I need to do at work,basically thinking about what
I'm going to do when I get offand my friend goes into the
dressing room Mind you, I saidshe had a kid, so she had a
stroller she goes into thedressing room and Annie is
(10:21):
immediately on her scent.
Annie is like nine monthspregnant, viciously beautiful,
like a really pretty lady, butscary at the same time.
So she's watching her.
She's like, oh, she's stealing.
I'm like she's stealing Didn'teven occur to me.
Sure enough, my friend wasactually stealing.
(10:41):
She ends up getting arrested.
Her husband has to come and getthe baby.
She's like banging her head onthe window.
It was a horrible scene and Ifelt so bad because I really
didn't know.
I had no idea what she wasdoing.
And then, when she came out ofthe dressing room, I know it was
written all over my face Likeyou're about to, you're about to
get caught.
Now it didn't occur to me.
(11:02):
I just assumed that Annie was aprofessional.
She'd been working indepartment stores for a long
time so she could just kind ofpick these things up.
Now Annie knew, because ittakes one to know one.
Tell me why Annie has a baby.
Maybe the next couple weeks sheshows up three days after
having the baby.
That to me is a scary woman.
She ain't worried about nothing.
She walking around with a freshAssyrian scar, working, still
(11:26):
looking gorgeous and mean.
Well, because she had a wholenother scheme, my friend.
She went into the changing roomand stole jeans like hit them
up under her baby stuff, causeshe was thinking I guess she was
thinking they were going tolift up the baby.
Annie would have random peoplecome in and like you know, you
(11:47):
say people you go in thedressing room, you'd clean it
out, you'd bring everything backto the counter and slowly fold
it and put it away, as you hadtime to do so.
She would actually have peoplecome in like say they bought a
t-shirt.
Well, she'd put the t-shirt inthe bag, but she'd also put the
clothes she picked up from thedressing room like expensive
jeans, expensive bras.
(12:08):
She put all this clothes in thebag with the person They'd walk
out and then she would sell itlater.
So she had this whole otheroperation going Incredible.
So one day I come to work and Ihear about her getting arrested.
She was like, oh my God, let meget up out of here.
This is a part-time job likethis is not that serious.
(12:28):
But I said that to say this.
It the minute my friend comeswalking out of the dressing room
and I knew that she wasstealing by that point.
It makes everything they doafter that almost comical.
It makes it so much stranger.
It makes everything you doafter that so much worse.
(12:48):
So back to Blake.
Blake knows that Tracy knowsEric.
He knows that Eric must haveput the bug in his ear to get
Tracy the job.
So he just starts to kind ofthink maybe Crystal wasn't
missing X, y and Z.
So as Tracy comes in and she'slike, oh gosh, you're so sweet
and thank you for being the bestboss ever.
You're such a good guy, you'resuch a noble, wonderful person.
It's just hidden a little bitdifferent because now he knows
(13:12):
she lying in his face.
So they go to dinner and shecontinues to try to charm him.
She's also trying to get intoBlake's geriatric draws.
He's not into it and he's godbless him.
I don't know how he makes itthrough this entire dinner.
Maybe he's just.
You know, he's a full grown man, he don't have time to be like
raging all the time.
(13:32):
But they're making it throughdinner and he takes about as
much as he can.
Then he has to leave to make aphone call.
She decides to remove anearring, the old earring, okie
doke.
So they get back to his hotel.
They're standing in the hallway.
She's making up some fakeMandarin.
Oh, this means goodbye.
(13:52):
I like you, you're the bestboss ever Giggling.
It's just team too much.
She's exposing herself.
Then she goes to do the you knowsweep the hair behind the ear
because I'm bashful.
And that's when she realizes inair quotes that she's lost her
earring, the earring that shesnatched off when he went to
take the phone call.
So she says oh my gosh, blake,I must have lost my earring.
(14:14):
You're such a gentleman not topoint it out to me all night.
Can I go in your hotel room andfind it Sure?
So she goes in and it's in herfist, obviously, sure.
So she goes in and it's in herfist Obviously.
She palms it, she pretends topick it up, she puts it on her
ear and he's like Tracy, do youknow why I didn't say anything?
Well, you're a gentleman.
But yes, I'm curious becauseyou had on earrings the whole
(14:35):
night.
See, I love earrings, I look atearrings all the time.
That's what I noticed more thananything.
I'm paraphrasing here.
You've had that the whole time.
And she's like well, okay, twochoices here I can deny it or I
can play into it.
So she's like well, f it, letme play into it.
He knows I have the earring, nobig deal.
(14:55):
She goes well, you know, I'mreally curious about you too,
blake.
I mean, I like to go after whatI want.
He goes oh well, let's call itthe Erickson, whatever.
He basically outs her forknowing who vague government guy
Eric Grayson is.
And she admits to it.
She's like yes, I know who heis and yes, we had an intimate
relationship.
I believe in going after who Iwant in intimate relationships.
(15:18):
He quickly fires her.
He has a check on hand.
He says good luck getting backto Denver tomorrow.
You're going to need to find aride from Hong Kong to Denver.
Figure it out.
Here's a check.
I just bought out your contract, and if that's not enough, I
want you to contact my financedepartment.
He's very firm with her.
He's like I know I'm rugged andhandsome and sexy and enticing
(15:39):
and I'm irresistible.
I get it, but I don't playthese games, young lady.
He scolds her, but all I'mthinking is do you think she's
going to be honest about thatcheck?
Because right after I tell thestory about two people stealing
by the way, that's a good bed.
(16:02):
I need soft pillows.
I could not be in jail.
That's not my thing, but Iwonder if Tracy will call and be
like y'all shorted me about$28,000.
I got a little ahead of myself.
I have to say, though, tracybesides, it's almost a fool's
errand.
I don't understand why shewould go for Blake, other than
(16:25):
that this is a soap opera, likeshe had everything and, honest
to God, she is a bettercandidate.
She was a better choice forthat particular company.
She could have just gone toAlexis.
I don't know if Alexis hiresbroads.
She seems to like tall, darkand handsome only.
So I don't know.
But speaking of Alexis and whoshe does and doesn't hire, we
(16:47):
got to talk about Mark Jennings.
I cannot decide if he is thecreme de la creme of side dudes
or is he like the worst employeeever.
I guess these two things couldalso be.
They're not musically exclusive.
So we see Mark walking aroundalexis penthouse in a robe.
(17:07):
He's going over to the tv toturn it on, about to have
himself a little brekkie.
I guess he's making too muchnoise or just his presence sort
of annoys alexis.
She comes out of her roomtelling him to be quiet.
She's got a hangover and heneeds to calm down.
She says this, mind you, asshe's picking up a silver
platter, clanging it around,making all the noise.
You can tell that Mark hasslipped in and out of many a
(17:33):
woman's bedroom, probably many amarried woman's bedroom.
So he's quite light on his feet.
I didn't hear anything.
His thick celic mustache ismasking his chewing sounds.
I don't know what she's talkingabout, but he says can I watch
sports news on the TV?
No, mark, tv turns on.
It happens to be Blake.
So this is where I got ahead ofmyself.
There's a press conferencewhere you can see Tracy in the
(17:55):
background, blake and RashidaMed, and Blake is explaining to
the world at large, how thereare these Southeastern oil wells
, they're going to begindrilling.
I'm not doing this on behalf ofa country, even though I work
for a country.
Doing this for myself.
It'll be good for all involved.
Blah, blah, blah.
Alexis can't believe this.
(18:16):
Like, wait a minute.
There's no way he is using hispolitical power to get ahead of
the game.
He shouldn't be able to do that.
I should have had a chance tobid on those.
So she feels a way andimmediately starts thinking
about how to get back at Blayden.
Mark in the meantime stillwants to watch sports ball, but
she sends him to his bedroom.
So he grabs a few extracroissants and some fruit and
(18:39):
some eggs and whatnot and hestarts heading to his bedroom
where he can watch his own TV.
Is he the K-Fed of side dudes,or I don't want to call anybody
a deadbeat, but I'm just sayingof men who are getting by on
their looks or the swivel oftheir hips?
Is he, did he hit the jackpothere?
(19:02):
Because, think about it, he'snot that great of an employee.
He's never really in the roomlong enough.
She stays kicking him out of aconversation.
She stays kicking him out ofher house or her excuse me her
living room.
He has to go to his room allthe time but he has the freedom
to come and go as he pleases.
I think he still.
He doesn't work a long miragebut he definitely hangs out at
the gym.
(19:22):
She told him last week didn'the have some muscles to pump or
something?
He has endless snacks.
He gets to go to the operasometimes.
He's got a lot of stuff to do.
I mean I think he's kind of gotit made in the shade.
Has he ever actually protectedher?
No, dex walked.
You know, dex don't believe indoors.
Dex walked right into her house, cussed Mark out.
(19:46):
He got sent to his room.
Like I'm like what do you?
Who are you protecting?
He got really lucky that onetime being in the right place at
the right time.
He got really lucky, hit thejackpot.
Because he's trying to sleep.
I don't know if he's up withFallon, that's irrelevant.
Anyway, phone rings or Alexisgets on the phone and Mark goes
in the other room, but he's notas slick as he thinks he is.
(20:07):
He's actually picked up theline and she can hear him.
She hears it.
Click over.
Rookie, mistake.
Everyone knows, especially ifyou are an elder millennial, if
you want to eavesdrop on yoursister's conversation.
The move is to wait untilthey're already on the phone to
pick it up.
You just have to ear hustlefrom the door If you want to
(20:29):
eavesdrop.
Back in the day on thetelephone, you got to be
conscious of the little clickeron the cradle.
So when you hang up the phoneyou can hear it.
It's little clicker on thecradle.
So when you hang up the phoneyou can hear it.
It's audible.
You can hear it on the otherend, you can hear it in the room
.
What you do, or what you couldhave done back in my day, was
you shout to the person hey, youhave a phone call and you just
(20:53):
hold the receiver on the in theother room Like you don't
actually hang it up.
You only shout so that theperson on the phone can hear you
shouting for the other person.
And then, once they pick up thephone, you pretend like you're
not listening, like do you haveit?
You wait for them to say theyhave it and then you just listen
and then you hang up when theyhang up.
If you really want to earhustle Not that I'm condoning it
(21:16):
, gosh I have to feel like Ihave to say this out loud I do
not condone shoplifting.
I do not condone blackmail.
I do not condone taking anextra $30,000 from your employer
.
I do not condone ear hustlingon the phone, unless, of course,
it's on TV.
Anyway, he's busted.
(21:38):
She calls him out and she'slike listen, I can hear you
slinking around listening to allof my conversation.
What do you want?
He's like well, alexis, I'monly listening because you are
such a smart businesswoman.
You see, I've saved up 20 grandand I want to make something of
myself.
I can't be a bodyguard forever.
I want to make something ofmyself.
So I thought if I just kind ofwatch you a little bit more and
(22:00):
pay attention to what you do, Ican do what you do.
She's flattered.
She's like well, you know whatAin't nothing wrong with making
a little money.
I understand that, but you gotto do it the right way, Mark.
Listen, go get cleaned up, getready.
We're going to leave for HongKong tomorrow and then you can
watch this money.
I'm about to make a lot moremoney, but I need you to protect
some money that I'm bringing.
He's like how much money?
(22:20):
I feel like she said that onlyso she could say this Much more
than $20,000.
And it'll be much more grand.
You don't have to rub it in hisface.
He knows he's a quote unquotebroke boy compared to you, but
is he, is he Kind of living thehigh life if you ask me?
(22:41):
But he does give off that K-Fedvibe Like he should hit the
jackpot.
Let me just, you know, play mypart until she gets rid of me,
and then maybe I could finaglesome sort of support.
I think that's the case in alot of things.
You don't have to outdo anybody, you just have to not make the
wrong move.
Think about Claudia.
(23:02):
Claudia is a two-time insaneasylum resident who is fully
aware of her emotions, fullyaware of how she's perceived,
fully aware of how shecommunicates.
She's keeping that in checklest she be perceived as insane.
There's about four people onthe show who are probably insane
(23:24):
, who are not nearly asself-aware as my girl.
She's trying her best.
So it just makes this sort oftelephone torment that much more
difficult.
So she's minding her business.
She's at the La Mirage.
Crystal comes by dressed in allblack.
At first I thought she had on alike a judge's robe or Baptist
(23:46):
pastor's robe all black.
No, no, no.
She just has on like crushedvelvet or something I don't know
.
She decided she's going to wearblack on black on black.
I don't know who she's buryinglater, but it is what it is.
It is a far cry from Crystaland Cream.
So she comes by to have lunchwith Claudia and Claudia's like,
yeah, girl, let me get my bag.
But she turns and she seessomeone from behind.
(24:06):
She quickly believes it'sLindsay.
Now I didn't think it wasLindsay because I watched season
one.
Lindsay's a 14 year old, verydramatic 14 year old, with very
light blonde hair.
I thought this could be a newface, new Steven thing.
I doubt she'd be standing inthe middle of La Mirage though.
So Claudia gets all besideherself, runs over to the girl,
(24:29):
spins her around and this is anyface Annie from Appalachia.
I don't know where this girl'sfrom.
She looks like any.
I don't know who she looks like.
Claudia quickly apologizes LikeI'm so sorry.
I used to know someone justlike you, right about your
height.
She used to wear dresses andshoes Like Claudia.
That's not enough evidence, butif you say so, crystal's
(24:52):
looking in the background likehmm God, I should have never
slept with Matthew and sent thislady to the loony bin.
This is a disaster, it's afiasco, but she keeps it
together.
I am going to skip ahead,though.
So there's a scene a littlelater on.
Claudia is trying to get somework done.
She and Fallon are in Fallon'soffice when the phone rings.
(25:14):
Somebody's playing on the damnphone again.
Fallon picks up the phone it'sfor Claudia, passes it to
Claudia, not even thinking twice, and then you hear Claudia, we
need you, darling, we're afamily, matthew, matthew, my
hips don't lie, matthew is onthe phone.
She immediately begins to freakout.
(25:35):
She's like Fallon.
Fallon call the cops.
I'm thinking on what line?
But then I remember this is ahotel, so there's other phones.
Fallon does that thing you dowhen you don't really want to do
something, like maybe you startmoving a little too slow.
You start reaching for theelevator button to stop it Wink,
wink, but you don't reallyreach for it.
You know the person is way toofar and you know they can't
(26:02):
really see what your hand isdoing.
She's running out the door, butit's a soap opera.
So she has to stop and swingher hair over her shoulder, and
right about that time Claudiaannounces that they hung up.
I wonder if Fallon's like oh myGod, I can't fire her because
this is my sister-in-law.
But we're going to have tofigure out something.
I can't keep having theseemotional outbursts.
(26:22):
I'm doing my own stuff here.
The calls to torment hercontinue and it's just
devastating.
Claudia's probably not going toget fired, but somebody did.
Alexis goes to work and inwalks this blonde kid I thought
it was Steven, there's a littleformal for work.
I thought it was new faceSteven.
And then he starts talking.
(26:43):
I'm like, oh, that's even newerface Steven.
But they replaced him again.
Like damn, what was going on inthe set of Dynasty?
Alexis says what is it Jason?
He goes, I'm not Jason.
Jason left last Friday.
I'm Lloyd.
So Lloyd looks like he could beStephen's stunt double or
brother or something.
She keeps a male staff and Ican appreciate that.
(27:04):
Well, while they're talking, inwalks you guessed it Dexter,
dexter.
Dexter doesn't check in, dexter, dexter doesn't make
appointments.
Dexter knows when you're havingan appointment.
He's going to burst throughyour doors.
Well, he comes walking in.
But he walks in with a gift.
Hey, foxy mama.
He says you want to go to LAwith me?
A little business for ourbusiness.
(27:25):
A little pleasure for ourpleasure.
I'm using creative libertieshere.
She opens a box and it is abushel of not a bushel.
What is it called?
A bouquet of lilies actually, Ilearned on this episode that it
is a corsage of lilies.
I didn't realize.
(27:45):
Corsages were sold year round.
I thought that was well, Idon't know.
I don't know if I knew that itmakes sense, as I say it a lot,
maybe for weddings, but I didn'tknow.
I didn't know.
People bought corsages outsideof prom.
Well, he bought her a tinylittle corsage of violets or
(28:06):
lilies, whatever the hell isscaring Claudia.
She puts them in her littlebowl and she's like oh honey,
I'm busy, I'm so busy, but youhave fun in LA with them, little
young bikini girls.
And he says honey, no, no, no,no, no.
I dropped them a long time agowhen I fell in love with you.
We're exclusive baby.
It's me and you and you and me.
Only she doesn't disagree, butshe also doesn't validate.
(28:29):
They end up kissing.
She also doesn't mention thatshe's about to get on the first
thing smoking and head over toHong Kong to handle some
business.
She keeps it to herself.
Stephen stops by the officelater and she just wants to let
him know that she's about tohead over to Hong Kong.
She apologizes, like you know,I'm real sorry that you and
(28:50):
Claudia are going through whaty'all are going through.
I know you went down to SouthAmerica and I hope y'all can
leave this in the past.
At this point, stephen's likemom I would love to but like
somebody's harassing her.
Hopefully it stops, I don'tknow.
She goes okay.
Well, let me tell you aboutyour trifling father.
Do you know?
I just saw your daddy on TVtalking about he bought up all
these Asian oil wells.
He didn't even give me a chanceto do it.
(29:10):
Stephen's like oh, that'sreally messed up.
We should have the opportunity.
She's like I know that's whyI'm going to Hong Kong.
And Stephen's like Mom, I don'tknow anything.
I know dad doesn't really snoopand steal, which I believe that
tracks.
The person you need to be madat is Adam.
She's not trying to hear that.
(29:31):
She's like it doesn't matterwho did it, it's done.
Now I got to go undo it.
Now I got to pack my stuff, flyhalfway across the world and do
something about it.
You know Stephen's looking ather and behind her he can see
the corsage of violence and he'slike where did you get some
flowers from?
She's like God, Stephen, calmdown.
Dexter sent them to me.
Oh, did he.
Now she's like man.
Anyway, I'm out, seems like allright, but I suppose he decides
(29:59):
to just sit in her office, ifI'm understanding this right.
Of course, there are scenesthat come and go in between this
, but he seems to just hang outin the office.
He's ready to get to the bottomof this because I mean, he
witnessed it for himself alittle bit on the episode where
he decided to go with Claudiadown to South America.
Remember they were?
Or here's the car, no sign ofthem.
There's a lot of wild animals.
(30:20):
I'm sorry.
We think they're gone.
I feel like I got to tell thisin order or else it won't make
sense.
So Alexis had made Laloid orJason call over to Hong Kong.
She wanted the best hotelpossible.
She also wanted Rashida Med tohang around.
She knows that Blake is on hisway back to Denver, and so does
Crystal, who's at the house.
(30:40):
Now, crystal's wardrobe is alittle bit different.
We saw her in head to toe black, which she doesn't really do.
She's sitting at breakfast themorning that Blake is supposed
to come home in this reallyweird sort of mauve, weird lace,
116 layer robe.
For no reason.
She's about to eat.
Adam comes downstairs and sheimmediately she's like hey, adam
(31:01):
.
She jumps up.
He's like hope you're notleaving on my behalf.
She's like no, I just got toget ready.
I want to meet Blake at theairport.
So Adam tells one of the housestaff I'm really hungry today.
Can I have a lot of food?
I'm really hungry today.
Can I have a lot of food?
It's like that.
Sometimes, adam, I hear you.
Yeah, sometimes, just give me awhole bunch.
(31:23):
Whatever you're going to giveme, give it to me like triple
Well, in walks, kirby, kirby.
And she is as giddy as she canpossibly be.
Something about her is off andI can't.
I'm like what the hell?
It almost looks like she walkedin from another dimension.
(31:45):
So she starts talking to Adam.
She's like hey, I did a littleresearch without the internet
and found out that my mother wasin an insane asylum in Bismarck
, north Dakota.
Now I want to fly over theretoday to still do a little more
research and see where she is,and I want you to go with me.
You told me you couldn't gowith me because Blake was out of
the office, but now that he'scoming back, I want you to go.
Adam's like honey, I think youshould let this go.
(32:09):
She immediately sort of flipson him Like why is this the one
part of me you can't take?
You can't take that.
My mother was in an insaneasylum.
You don't want to deal withthat part of me.
First and foremost, she lookslike she walked out of a
different dimension.
I couldn't quite put my fingeron it, but as I watch they've
got her in like a gray tones.
She looks a lot like the ladyfrom the Helen Keller story that
(32:30):
I go on and on about, a schoolmom from 17th or 18th or 19th
century Georgia.
It looks like they superimposedher face and hands on like a
black and white film, buteverybody else is in color.
It's whatever.
I don't know why they got herdressed like this, like
Wednesday, adam.
But this request for Adam okay,cool, I understand that you're
(32:52):
embracing all this, but thinkabout it.
Adam definitely has.
I don't know if he spent timein an insane asylum.
He has gone insane.
His father has two attemptedmurder, one attempted murder
charge, one murder charge underhis belt.
His mom has somebody trying tokill her.
Joseph tried to kill her.
(33:14):
His mother I mean her mom beingin the insane asylum is
probably the most mellow versionof their family tree if you
think about it.
That's the last thing anybodyneeds to be worried about.
Also, adam does not know how todo gentle contact.
He goes to hug her and he'slike Kirby, kirby, kirby.
(33:34):
He kind of grabs her a littletoo rough, damn, their tackles
are okay, honey.
No, no, I love you, I'll gowith you, I'll be with you.
So I suppose this morningthey're going to get on the PJ
and they're going to fly up toBismarck, north Dakota.
I hate that.
I even have to say this Do youremember when the Colby's the
other Colby?
That's another thing.
Can we just stop just for asecond?
(33:56):
When Kirby walks in the room,the maid says Mrs Colby, would
you like breakfast?
No, says Kirby.
I'd like to talk to MrCarrington.
There are too many people inthis house with the same name
for the wrong reason.
The very next scene is theother Colbys, the divorced
Colbys.
(34:16):
So you have, think about it.
You have Crystal Grant Jennings, carrington, carrington.
Technically, I guess they gotmarried twice.
You got Kirby Anders Colbyabout to be Carrington.
So Kirby Anders, colby,carrington.
You'll have Claudia Blaisdell,carrington.
Then you got this full Jeff andFallon, who've come in from
(34:39):
either skiing or riding horses.
He has on riding boots I'mgoing to assume that's what they
did.
They seem to have on a lot oflayers.
They get to the landing on thestair step and he's like would
you marry me again?
I'm like, oh my God, with this,here we go again with this Jeff
, this woman, you are a filler.
Jeff is like a delicious.
(35:00):
If you ever go to a party andsomeone lays out ritz and maybe
they put tuna, sometimes theyput ham, they put jam, you can
dress up a ritz any way you wantand it's delicious.
It's a nice little snack.
Probably never going to turn itdown unless there's a real meal
there.
Fallon wants a real meal,preferably a geriatric one, if
(35:20):
she can get it.
Jeff is you just need tounderstand.
You are the hors d'oeuvre, youare the doormat, you are the
denim doormat.
You know damn well the minuteand I do mean the second she
sees another man who is evenmildly interesting, sees another
(35:42):
man who is even mildlyinteresting, minutely dangerous.
His ass is to the curb but he's.
Would you want to marry meagain?
You know I'm a good dad and allthat.
You're too young first off,you're too boring.
Second off no, she don't wantyou.
She don't want you because youwant her, but she's like I don't
know, jeff, I think it could bewonderful, let's think about it
.
So you're going to be FallonCarrington, colby hyphen.
Colby, do you know howembarrassing that is?
(36:02):
I think you know.
I know the marriage clerk hatesto see these people coming.
Can you imagine and that's mything Everybody is married and
divorced.
Within two months Y'all breakup to make up, to make up to
break up.
I can't deal with this as amatter of fact.
I think you should.
Just if you're going to remarrythe same person.
(36:23):
We ain't refiling it.
I'm not refiling nothing.
I'm just going to put like astamp, just like a passport
stamp on your marriage license.
Get the hell out of here.
We'll just put a new year on it, annulled, in the next 14
(36:44):
months.
Anyway, I'm not going to keepdoing this paperwork, especially
back in the day.
You have to type it all outagain.
You can just copy and paste.
Absolutely not.
But it is my duty to reportthat they are entertaining this
foolishness.
Now back to Bismarck.
Adam accompanies Kirby toBismarck, north Dakota.
(37:04):
Oddly enough, kirby to BismarckNorth Dakota.
Oddly enough, she found asepia-toned cardigan to cover
her sepia-toned outfit.
I don't know why this girl isdressed like this, I can't
stress it enough, but it didmake me.
I came up with a theory.
Hear me out after this.
They go to a newspaper stationand it's taking a little bit of
time and she's a little bitnervous, so she's kind of
(37:24):
walking back and forth.
Adam tells her to relax.
The guy is a newspaper editor.
I'm sure someone had to stop.
Like he's probably talking toreporters too.
We did come in the middle ofhis workday unannounced.
So I mean it's going to take alittle time, adam's not wrong.
Also, they're looking for thisinformation by hand, I'm sure.
So that takes time as well.
Eventually the editor comes outand he hands Kirby an article
(37:48):
that explains that, yes, hermother was once upon a time in
the asylum there.
So let him tell it.
The mom, yes, had been in theinsane asylum, but she was
evaluated and released just sixmonths ago.
She was released as a sanewoman just six months ago.
So I don't know what thetimeline is looking like of
supposed assault tracks.
(38:08):
I'm glad I went back andwatched this a second time
because I didn't actually catchthat the first time.
It wasn't making sense to me,while Joseph would be like, hey,
let me go in this.
So Kirby's like great.
So she's released six monthsago.
Do you know where she is?
Like yeah, I do Actually gotthe address.
I have to recall that this is1984.
So I suppose rental cars werenot as luxe as they are today.
(38:32):
Or maybe Adam knew a guy, Idon't know.
But they pull up in a doo-doobrown beater almost a beater.
It's got this like gold andorange stripe down the side.
It is a typical 70s and 80sland yacht.
It isn't hideous but it's notnearly as nice as the other cars
(38:53):
.
It's very inconspicuous, Isuppose.
So Kirby pulls up to thegraveyard I forgot to tell y'all
that and she's creeped out bythis woman who's laying flowers
down.
And the woman says hey, who areyou looking for?
Kirby says she's looking forAlicia Anders and the woman
points over you know severalgraves over.
I'm now thoroughly creeped outbecause, madam, do you live here
(39:19):
?
She was a little bit creepy tome, madam, do you live here?
Well, she walks over to Kirby.
She looks a little shocked atfirst and this is an older woman
, like I think she's too old tobe her mom.
Well, I guess she couldn't betoo old to be her mom.
I don't know, maybe that's her,I don't know.
I don't know who she is, butshe's an older woman.
(39:40):
She claims that she and aliciawere friends and and that she
knows who she is because whenher mother was in the insane
asylum, she made this rag dolland she dressed it up and she
called it Kirby.
The woman claims that shewalked around with this rag doll
named Kirby and she went to golook for Kirby and her dad.
(40:01):
And she went to go look forKirby and her dad and then, you
know, unfortunately she expiredwithin these last six months.
This is all very sad.
Kirby even started having aflashback, but my trifling TV
loving behind is fixated on theword ragdoll.
(40:23):
Tell me why.
My next thought is when yourmom went nuts, she made herself
a ragdoll.
Call that thing Baby Kirby.
Now you dress just like the wayshe dressed that rag doll
(40:54):
little, dark and real creepy.
Ignore me, do not pay me anymind, but I'm sorry.
I love that movie and I don'thear the word river or ragoll
without hearing river, deep,mountain high.
It is impossible.
But yeah, kirby's mom waswalking around with a ragdoll,
probably dressed like the waykirby's dressed.
Now I wonder who she pissed offin wardrobe.
(41:16):
It's very distracting.
But the even bigger distractingtake is that?
Okay, now I need a timeline,because all of these things in
and of themselves don't actuallyrequire Joseph to expire.
Seems like that's kind of goingoff the deep end based on the
person he appeared to be.
(41:36):
But is this the big secret?
Like?
If she's dead, then who cares?
Even if she died a little bitlater, I mean, oh god, that
sounded really insensitive.
You know what I'm saying,though, like it doesn't change
the fact, kirby still doesn'thave a mom.
Yes, she was alive at somepoint, but she was also in an
insane asylum.
Is there another secret?
(41:57):
There has to be something alittle bit juicier than this.
I don't want to see.
I don't want to seem ungrateful.
Two deaths and a weird scene ata cemetery is is enough.
But now, kirby, she startedhaving these little flashbacks.
She could hear alexis talkingcash crazy about her mama.
Now she's in her felix, but letthe record reflect, there was
(42:19):
no lies told, not by alexis atleast.
I mean, yeah, she was having alittle too much fun with the
information, but I don't know.
It seems like.
It seems like they jumped offthe deep end.
Plus, knowing the story thatyou know, mr Brevere wanted a
couple more scenes.
And they're like no, not onlyare you not getting any more
(42:40):
scenes, we're gonna have you tryto kill alexis and then you're
gonna expire tragic.
Okay, speaking of alexis again,remember when I told you steven
was just chilling in the office?
Well, I know that to be a factbecause dex dexter comes
bursting through the doors alittle later on.
He's gonna walk into alexis'soffice.
(43:02):
But new laloid says hey, do youwant to leave a message?
I'll let her know when she getsback from Hong Kong.
Dex's like Hong Kong, who's inHong Kong?
Here comes Steven, real Stevenhead pops out of the office.
Like hey, dex, did you come byto leave my mom some flowers?
You want to give her someflowers?
And Dex was looking at him likeboy, I mean, yeah, I guess I
(43:22):
could.
Stephen's like oh, you're goingto send violets.
Is that your style?
And Dex kind of turns to facehim.
He wasn't going to say that.
But he turns to face him likeokay, what is this?
Or orchids, or whatever I wantactually.
Why don't you come on in thisoffice, dexter.
Dex walks in.
He's like what do you want?
I love it.
(43:43):
I love it.
This is a grown man with notime to play, so he walks in
this office.
And Stephen's, like your dadused to work for my dad, right,
so he knows Matthew Blaisdell, Ithink it's kind of funny that
you guys have the same voice.
Why do you guys kind of soundthe same?
And Dex is like I don't know,cause we come from the same
state, it's not uncommon, it'scalled an accent.
(44:06):
And Steven's like you don'tlike me very much, do you.
And Dax's like you know what,now that you bring it up, yeah,
no, I actually I don't.
Ever since the first time I metyou, I came off a trip with
your mama.
You, you was puffing your chestout at me.
I don't.
I don't like the way you lookat me.
I don't like the way youpresent yourself to me, sir, and
(44:26):
you know what I don't do.
I made it my business a longtime ago to not like people who
don't like me.
I'm not going to put in theeffort.
That's some wisdom.
I feel like that's somethingyou learn between the ages of
like 27 and 31.
You just understand.
It's okay Sometimes.
You're not going to mesh wellwith everybody.
Everybody doesn't have to beyour friend, you don't have to
(44:47):
keep up with everybody.
You don't have to be hateful.
You can be respectful.
You can live your life justlike good old Dexie Dex is doing
.
I don't like you, you don'tlike me and that's where we're
going to keep it Stephen's up.
Well, you better not hurt mymother and you better not be
making those phone calls to mywife.
Dex ex is like listen,whatever's going on with your
wife.
That is really messed up.
It's very lousy.
(45:08):
I don't do that.
Trust and believe I'm not theone or the two.
Goodbye.
So he leaves and we need toflip back to the moment.
Do you remember when I told youthat Fallon was looking at
Claudia like dang?
I can't really fire her?
This was kind of weird.
Claudia had got that phone call.
Well, the way it's positionedin this episode.
Claudia gets a phone call,she's freaking out, she's trying
(45:29):
to calm herself down.
Fallon is looking like dang Idon't know about all this and
then you see a man's beautiful,strong hand at a pay phone sort
of hesitates.
Then he picks up the phone andwhen they zoom out I'm like, oh
my God, I was watching himcooking and I'm like, oh my God,
who is it?
Who is it?
Who is it?
It's Dex.
(45:50):
What you're not going to do,dynasty, is have me ever believe
that's the case.
I think this is just.
They shot it that way.
So you're like, oh my God, isDex making phone calls?
No, no, dex is calling HongKong to figure out what hotel
his lady love is in.
He's going to go over to HongKong to confront Alexis up front
(46:11):
.
Now there's a lot to deducefrom this Number one.
It is quite obvious Dex is waymore into her than she is to him
.
I think part of the reason shekeeps Mark around is because
there is sort of this tension.
She knows that Mark wants her,she kind of wants him, but she
(46:31):
just needs him around to boosther ego.
I don't think she feels thesame way about Dex, but also I
don't know he takes this farmore serious.
I think, going back to sort ofmy opening statement, I forget
that this is about business.
Going back to sort of myopening statement, I forget that
this is about business.
Sometimes I forget that this isabout running these two giant
(46:52):
corporations.
When you think about a BlakeBlake allegedly was a Derek Hand
.
He worked his way, started fromthe bottom.
Now he's up at the top, whereAlexis has always sort of been
this carefree, wealthy womanwho's been in all the right
circles.
But it isn't because she hasall this business knowledge.
It's because she understandspeople, for better or worse.
(47:14):
She knows how to push thebuttons, she knows what rooms to
be in, she knows how to putthat ish on, she knows how to
make herself alluring andenticing.
She knows all the things.
So I forget that when it comesto business she is a little bit
behind the curve.
She may not know all the things, she may not know how to
navigate everything, but sheknows who to pick and who to
(47:35):
keep in her corner so that theright things are picked properly
.
You know what I'm saying.
She's playing a totallydifferent game.
I'm sure over time she willgain this business knowledge.
But where Mark is just to feedher ego and maybe put someone in
a chokehold if he happens to beallowed in the room at the same
time she's being choked, isDexter, just like her business
(47:58):
boy.
Is that what he is?
I don't know.
I don't know, but I'm here forit either way.
Is I don't know?
I don't know, but I'm, but I'mhere for it either way.
He's gonna be mad.
Mad because when Alexis doesfinally get to Hong Kong, she
did have this whole suite, whichMark knew about.
Because Mark feels more likeher stepson, who she just
(48:19):
happens to have to keep aroundfor some reason.
He's like hey, I thought wewere getting a suite.
He's like we are getting asuite, but this is your room.
You have an outside entrance.
You're going to stay over hereand we have adjoining rooms.
We have a joining door.
If I still feel like you needto come in there, I'll open the
door and let you in, but youneed to stay in your room and
mind your business.
Once again, she is sunning him,so so so she goes into her room
(48:49):
.
Everything is set aside, it islush, it is beautiful, it was
all that.
No sooner than she gets alittle bit settled in, walks
Rashida Med Rashid is like hey,you're so hot, you're so
tempting, you're also so vague.
What do you want me here for?
She?
Something about five milliondollars.
He's trying to get her in thesack.
(49:09):
She's like I'm too tired forall that.
You can just watch me sleep ifyou really really want to, but
I'm not gonna hook up with you.
I think they end up hooking up.
But I was sort of fixated onthe five million dollars because
there was a scene I left outwhere blake is talking about how
much money he has to raise inorder to buy all these wells.
It's something like a hundredmillion dollars.
(49:30):
But you know, one day out he'salready got like 50,000, $50
million.
He's just needs a few morepeople.
People are calling in left andright.
It's an overflow.
So I'm like what is she goingto do with $5 million?
I don't know, but I can't waitto find out.
In my haste I forgot to tellyou guys my theory on my girl
(49:52):
Kirby.
Kirby Colby Carrington, the ragdoll.
I don't really understand whereher wardrobe choices are coming
from.
They are very much a littleprairie.
But antique that's the wordI'll use.
It's antique Even from 1980,these are clearly outfits, in my
(50:12):
personal opinion, from 1860,1880.
So I started looking at her.
When I said her face lookedlike it was superimposed upon a
black and white film, film noir.
It hit me she looks a whole lotlike Wednesday Addams.
I'm not one for conspiracytheories, I'm not one for this
(50:35):
metaverse flip-flopping outsideof my comics, but I'll entertain
this thought what if Kirby'sbaby didn't actually die?
Hear me out.
Remember when adam was in thein the hospital, pooping and
hollering and carrying onpraying, confessing that he was
a rapist and all that?
He just wanted his baby girl tolive.
Remember when kirby triedeverything under the sun,
(50:56):
falling downstairs, ignoringpreeclampsia, sweating like a
bad fish in a in an ice bucket Idon't even know what that means
.
She was walking around lookinggray and and pale and and damn
near near death, but no onenoticed because there was a
second wedding of these freakingcarrington people.
(51:18):
Anyway.
What if kirby gives birth tothis baby and somehow Adam's
weird prayer works?
There's a weird doctor who'sbeen selling like boob jobs or
formula or something on the sidethat well, is dried up.
So she has to come up withanother solution.
So she starts stealing babieswho she could tell the mother
(51:40):
didn't want them.
So they tell Kirby and Adamthat their baby is deceased.
Only she's not.
She is sent away to anorphanage and it is immediately
clear that she is weird, thatshe has this strange sort of
creepy doll effect to her andall of her clothes are gothic
(52:02):
and antique.
The nurse takes a little bit ofpity on her.
She knows her mother's name isKirby, but she thinks that's a
weird name.
She knows that there's going tobe a Nintendo game and a vacuum
cleaner in the very near futurewith those same names.
So she decides to name herWednesday for the day she was
born and in honor of her father.
She just calls her Adam.
Wednesday.
Adam Sends her off to an asylumand every excuse me to an
(52:26):
orphanage.
The baby creeps out, all theother babies and this couple
from France has recently movedto the US and they need to
acclimate pretty quickly.
They're creepy, they're weird,they're wearing all black and
stuff.
But you know what this babyfits their aesthetic, plus
they're loaded.
They pay buku money for a babyand then, ladies and gentlemen,
(52:51):
that is how we get christinaricci's version of wednesday in
the 1991 film the adams familyvalues.
Or is it just the regular adamsfamily?
I'm just saying.
I'm just saying Somebodyborrowed this aesthetic and
listened very carefully.
Because I grew up hangingaround old people, I've seen the
original Addams Family a lotand the original Wednesday, what
(53:15):
was that?
Circa 1960, 1950 something.
She was a little more funny,she was a little more jovial,
she had a sense of humor was alittle more jovial.
She had a sense of humor.
Christina Ricci, millennialicon or she's like a, she's a
zillennial icon.
But she played the hell out ofWednesday and I love the new
Wednesday too.
But it is Kirby's face, kirby'saesthetic.
(53:36):
Isn't that the perfect formulafor Wednesday circa 1991?
Now, I did the math.
This show was shot in 1984.
That movie was from 1991.
Yes, I think Wednesday wassupposed to be about nine or 10,
but this baby would read as anolder child because she's so
stoic and creepy.
(53:56):
That's all I'm saying.
Thank you for coming to my TEDTalk.
All right party people.
Thank you so much for joiningme for another fun filled
edition of soap lore.
I thoroughly enjoyed thisepisode of dynasty.
You always need a little shine,a little camp and, between some
of the more serious storylines,join me next time as we jump
back into some vintage primetimedrama and debauchery.
(54:20):
In the meantime in time, ifyou're a beautiful man with
Elvis hips, you know, go for theolder ladies.
You get trips to Hong Kong,you're going to get stellar
breakfasts, you're going to getcaviar sandwiches, a gym
membership.
All you got to do is not sayanything dumb.
(54:40):
Stay hydrated, stay moisturized, mind your own business and
keep all of your drama on TV.
Bye.
in and out of many a woman's bedroom, probably many a
married woman's bedroom.
So he's quite light on his feet.
I didn't hear anything.
His thick celic mustache ismasking his chewing sounds.
I don't know what she's talkingabout, but, ladies and gentlemen
, boys and girls, welcome andwelcome back to so plory, the
official gathering place fornewbies, novices and og diehard
fans of the golden age ofprimetime.
(00:21):
I'm your host, jeff, viewingand reviewing one of the golden
age of primetime.
I'm your host, jeb, viewing andreviewing one of the stopiest,
subdiest primetime storylines of1984 or 85.
So, whether you're new to thisor true to this, sit back and
enjoy.
Tell the kids it's time to playoutside or out of sight, tell
babe, no questions, suggestionsor concerns for the next 25 to
35 minutes.
(00:41):
Everyone else in Airshot, cool,quiet or kicked all the way out
.
I'm not playing with y'alltoday.
We are watching our stories.
Ladies and gentlemen, boys andgirls, this is Soap Lore.
(01:02):
Hello, gorgeous, welcome back.
Party people with people whoparty to another fun build
edition of SoFloor.
We're in Denver today.
Put on your finest sateen robe,your comfiest socks or, if
you're driving baby up the hill,yeah, I guess get comfortable.
I don't really know what totell you I know some cars have
(01:24):
massage sheets, massage seats.
Now, quite frankly, that's.
That's baby y'all to hear about.
Every other day they play jetis once again in a ditch
somewhere.
Driving off the side of the roadwas just luxe, luxury.
I would work from my car, Ireally would.
(01:45):
First time I got cooling seats,baby, you couldn't tell me
nothing, especially growing upas a little kid in West Texas.
God, the summers were so hot,you know you could have window
tinting, but the fats arerelevant.
It's going to the sun's goingto blaze through there.
Cars are sitting outside forhours and hours at a time, at a
whopping 100, probably 25 in thecar.
(02:07):
Oh my gosh, you can always finda desert kid.
All desert kids have at leastone seat belt burn when the
metal catches you at the wrongspot, like even if you had cloth
seats.
They were hot.
But man, those leather seats,girl, we used to bring towels
out to the car to sit down.
Oh, rough times, but we'regonna.
(02:29):
We're gonna float into someeasy times.
Today we're also going to jumpinto a little bit of fan mail.
So join me for season four,episode 21, dynasty, the voice,
part two.
This family was hilarious.
All she says at the beginningis sparkling water.
Ew, what is your favoritebubbly and bright beverage?
(02:54):
Do you drink champagne?
Love the show.
I am a Dallas fan.
I remember watching this withmy grandma and her neighbor.
Thank you so much, kima.
I'm so glad that you wereenjoying the show.
That's so cool that you got towatch it.
I'm a little bit envious.
So, yeah, favorite bubbly,bright beverage it is sparkling
(03:16):
water.
And I tell you what you justgot to choke it down.
I don't want soda, so I decidedto just try something else.
I wanted the effect that itgave.
Like I felt like it gives me alittle pick me up in the middle
of the day.
I love the sound of a canopening.
Prefer cans over plasticbottles.
Drink anything out of a glassbottle, but yeah, I prefer
sparkling water.
(03:37):
I would just advise hey, try it.
Buy yourself a little six packin the can, drink it for like
two days and I promise youyou'll start to be like okay,
this isn't bad, it's actuallyreally good.
I don't really enjoy champagne.
However, in all fairness, Iprobably have only had champagne
on New Year's Eve and NewYear's Day, so, uh, and I'm sure
(03:58):
it was just whatever wasavailable at the grocery store,
much like wine.
I'm not nearly as versed inthat, but I'm willing to try it.
My favorite beverage ever isjust water.
My favorite bubbly beveragewould be sparkling water and
although I don't drink champagne, I do drink beer from time to
time.
I would say, like a MichelobUltra, every blue moon.
(04:21):
Ooh, speaking of one time, somefriends and I went to this bar.
I can't remember what we werecelebrating, but I had a blue
moon with her, which is a brandI'm assuming it's national.
I don't think I've ever seenany commercials, but they serve
it with an orange wedge.
Very delicious if you're intothat.
But yeah, beer is one of thosethings.
Every literal blue moon, onceevery couple of years.
(04:44):
Something all right, girl.
Well, thank you for writing in.
You guys can always reach outto me.
On the show notes there shouldbe a link to send us a text.
I cannot respond back to you ina text, but I will respond back
to you in an email.
You can reach out to us at soaplore podcast at gmail.
S-o-a-p-l-o-r-e-p-o-d-c-a-s-tat gmailcom.
(05:07):
Love hearing from you.
And uh, unfortunately we're notwatching Dallas today, but we
are jumping back into Dynastyand I had a time with this one.
We got to get to the bottom ofthe Mark Jennings thing.
I got to get over my disgustfor all Carrington couples.
And what's going on with Kirby?
I think Kirby pissed offsomeone in the wardrobe
(05:30):
department.
Let's jump into the Voice, part2.
Sometimes when I'm watchingDynasty I forget that this is
about a business.
It's about a family, but it'salso about the business.
I just forget that sometimesbecause there is oh so much
pleasure Hard to separate thetwo.
I guess the two aren't alwaysmutually exclusive.
(05:51):
You can find a lot of pleasurein the business you do, but
that's not what we're talkingabout.
That's not what me and you aretalking about.
That's not what Blake's talkingabout either.
So the show opens up with Blakein Hong Kong.
He's sitting at his desk whenin walks, ahmed Rashida, rashida
Med.
If you are a recent soap fiendlike myself, you'll remember him
from Falcon Crust.
That's Julia's original husbandwho ran off on her turned back
(06:15):
up because he needed something.
She ran off to San Franciscothinking they were going to
rekindle something.
You know she thought he wantedthat old thing back.
Unfortunately he had an entireother family then she almost got
ran through by some sailors.
But her son came through andbeat everybody down.
It was a whole mess.
Now he's back to being AhmedRashid or Rashid Ahmed, over on
(06:35):
Dynasty, if that doesn't soundlike a child support town
skipping baby daddy me, I don'tknow what does.
So air quotes on me, excuse me.
Rashid comes into Blake'sgorgeous penthouse and he's like
oh my God you're.
I'm not even going to do theaccent because it's
disrespectful regardless.
(06:56):
I don't know who he's supposedto be.
I don't know what part ofSoutheast Asia, what that means,
that could be anywhere, but heis.
Why is he representing thatgovernment in Hong Kong?
Now that I think about it, Iguess that will be revealed in
time.
It wasn't revealed on thisepisode.
All he wants to talk about isthose dames.
Man, your secretary's hot Ooh,and you married that baddie of a
(07:17):
wife Ooh, and you had thatbaddie of an ex-wife.
Blake's just trying to read afew papers.
He's like look, look, rashid, Idon't like you, you don't like
me.
We're not here to talk aboutcatch and tail.
You're here to represent yourgovernment.
I'm here to represent mygovernment, both of them very
ambiguously.
By the way, we don't know whatparty Blake is representing.
Some piece of the governmentreached out to him to represent
(07:39):
the party.
Rashid is representing thatgovernment and we'll keep it
there.
She's like okay, you right, youright, let me calm down.
Blake then calls his lady tocheck up on her.
You know, crystal is exactly 14and a half seconds pregnant, so
she is laying down in bed inher silk robe with her doily
sleeves.
It's actually a really cutegown.
(08:00):
Alexis is wearing somethingvery similar in the next couple
of scenes, but they're justchatting about what's going to
happen.
He's telling her to make sureshe watches him on the news,
make sure she gets enough rest.
She's like yeah, you too.
Congratulations, blake, this isso wonderful.
I'm glad you're having a goodtime.
I'm glad everything's goingsmoothly Well.
There's a knock at the door.
The bellboy comes in andthey're like hey, here's your
(08:33):
luggage that was lost.
Blake's like thank you, itseems to be an airline bag, like
a nylon bag that they give allthe passengers, and a briefcase.
So once he hangs up withCrystal, he goes over to open
the nylon bag, the airline bag,and the first thing that comes
out is their hair dryer.
Judging by Blake's impeccablycoiffed hair, I didn't think
that was unusual.
I thought he was just going tounpack a bag and the next thing
that comes out is their hairdryer.
Judging by Blake's impeccablycoiffed hair, I didn't think
that was unusual.
I thought he was just going tounpack a bag and the next thing
you know, he pulls out a pictureof Tracy and Eric Grayson.
Now, this is odd, because hedidn't know that they knew each
(08:55):
other.
Remember Now why this woman, whodoesn't know how to separate
business and pleasure, wouldwalk around with physical
photographic evidence in her bag.
I'm sure I don't know, butBlake sees it.
He quickly understands what'sgoing on here.
Like, wait a minute.
So she been knew him because inthe picture she said and all in
(09:16):
his life, this is an, this is agood picture, and the fact that
she's saving it means something.
So right about.
Then Tracy comes knocking atthe door and she's going on and
on about how oh my gosh, blake,we have the same bag.
I'm such a clutch and it's afunny thing that happens.
I'm sure I've already told thestory, but I'm going to tell it
again for the newest people.
(09:38):
Once upon a time I was workingat this department store and a
friend that I had known.
I'd worked with her previouslywhen we were teenagers, like at
the movies.
She came in and she had herbaby.
So I'm like, oh my gosh, we'rejust chatting, everything's good
.
Oh my gosh, girl that well,there's this girl that I worked
with.
What, what can I say?
Let's call her Annie.
(10:00):
Annie is walking around lookingat my friend as my friend is
shopping.
I'm none the wiser, just kindof having a good time doing
whatever I need to do at work,basically thinking about what
I'm going to do when I get offand my friend goes into the
dressing room Mind you, I saidshe had a kid, so she had a
stroller she goes into thedressing room and Annie is
(10:21):
immediately on her scent.
Annie is like nine monthspregnant, viciously beautiful,
like a really pretty lady, butscary at the same time.
So she's watching her.
She's like, oh, she's stealing.
I'm like she's stealing Didn'teven occur to me.
Sure enough, my friend wasactually stealing.
(10:41):
She ends up getting arrested.
Her husband has to come and getthe baby.
She's like banging her head onthe window.
It was a horrible scene and Ifelt so bad because I really
didn't know.
I had no idea what she wasdoing.
And then, when she came out ofthe dressing room, I know it was
written all over my face Likeyou're about to, you're about to
get caught.
Now it didn't occur to me.
(11:02):
I just assumed that Annie was aprofessional.
She'd been working indepartment stores for a long
time so she could just kind ofpick these things up.
Now Annie knew, because ittakes one to know one.
Tell me why Annie has a baby.
Maybe the next couple weeks sheshows up three days after
having the baby.
That to me is a scary woman.
She ain't worried about nothing.
She walking around with a freshAssyrian scar, working, still
(11:26):
looking gorgeous and mean.
Well, because she had a wholenother scheme, my friend.
She went into the changing roomand stole jeans like hit them
up under her baby stuff, causeshe was thinking I guess she was
thinking they were going tolift up the baby.
Annie would have random peoplecome in and like you know, you
(11:47):
say people you go in thedressing room, you'd clean it
out, you'd bring everything backto the counter and slowly fold
it and put it away, as you hadtime to do so.
She would actually have peoplecome in like say they bought a
t-shirt.
Well, she'd put the t-shirt inthe bag, but she'd also put the
clothes she picked up from thedressing room like expensive
jeans, expensive bras.
(12:08):
She put all this clothes in thebag with the person They'd walk
out and then she would sell itlater.
So she had this whole otheroperation going Incredible.
So one day I come to work and Ihear about her getting arrested.
She was like, oh my God, let meget up out of here.
This is a part-time job likethis is not that serious.
(12:28):
But I said that to say this.
It the minute my friend comeswalking out of the dressing room
and I knew that she wasstealing by that point.
It makes everything they doafter that almost comical.
It makes it so much stranger.
It makes everything you doafter that so much worse.
(12:48):
So back to Blake.
Blake knows that Tracy knowsEric.
He knows that Eric must haveput the bug in his ear to get
Tracy the job.
So he just starts to kind ofthink maybe Crystal wasn't
missing X, y and Z.
So as Tracy comes in and she'slike, oh gosh, you're so sweet
and thank you for being the bestboss ever.
You're such a good guy, you'resuch a noble, wonderful person.
It's just hidden a little bitdifferent because now he knows
(13:12):
she lying in his face.
So they go to dinner and shecontinues to try to charm him.
She's also trying to get intoBlake's geriatric draws.
He's not into it and he's godbless him.
I don't know how he makes itthrough this entire dinner.
Maybe he's just.
You know, he's a full grown man, he don't have time to be like
raging all the time.
(13:32):
But they're making it throughdinner and he takes about as
much as he can.
Then he has to leave to make aphone call.
She decides to remove anearring, the old earring, okie
doke.
So they get back to his hotel.
They're standing in the hallway.
She's making up some fakeMandarin.
Oh, this means goodbye.
(13:52):
I like you, you're the bestboss ever Giggling.
It's just team too much.
She's exposing herself.
Then she goes to do the you knowsweep the hair behind the ear
because I'm bashful.
And that's when she realizes inair quotes that she's lost her
earring, the earring that shesnatched off when he went to
take the phone call.
So she says oh my gosh, blake,I must have lost my earring.
(14:14):
You're such a gentleman not topoint it out to me all night.
Can I go in your hotel room andfind it Sure?
So she goes in and it's in herfist, obviously, sure.
So she goes in and it's in herfist Obviously.
She palms it, she pretends topick it up, she puts it on her
ear and he's like Tracy, do youknow why I didn't say anything?
Well, you're a gentleman.
But yes, I'm curious becauseyou had on earrings the whole
(14:35):
night.
See, I love earrings, I look atearrings all the time.
That's what I noticed more thananything.
I'm paraphrasing here.
You've had that the whole time.
And she's like well, okay, twochoices here I can deny it or I
can play into it.
So she's like well, f it, letme play into it.
He knows I have the earring, nobig deal.
(14:55):
She goes well, you know, I'mreally curious about you too,
blake.
I mean, I like to go after whatI want.
He goes oh well, let's call itthe Erickson, whatever.
He basically outs her forknowing who vague government guy
Eric Grayson is.
And she admits to it.
She's like yes, I know who heis and yes, we had an intimate
relationship.
I believe in going after who Iwant in intimate relationships.
(15:18):
He quickly fires her.
He has a check on hand.
He says good luck getting backto Denver tomorrow.
You're going to need to find aride from Hong Kong to Denver.
Figure it out.
Here's a check.
I just bought out your contract, and if that's not enough, I
want you to contact my financedepartment.
He's very firm with her.
He's like I know I'm rugged andhandsome and sexy and enticing
(15:39):
and I'm irresistible.
I get it, but I don't playthese games, young lady.
He scolds her, but all I'mthinking is do you think she's
going to be honest about thatcheck?
Because right after I tell thestory about two people stealing
by the way, that's a good bed.
(16:02):
I need soft pillows.
I could not be in jail.
That's not my thing, but Iwonder if Tracy will call and be
like y'all shorted me about$28,000.
I got a little ahead of myself.
I have to say, though, tracybesides, it's almost a fool's
errand.
I don't understand why shewould go for Blake, other than
(16:25):
that this is a soap opera, likeshe had everything and, honest
to God, she is a bettercandidate.
She was a better choice forthat particular company.
She could have just gone toAlexis.
I don't know if Alexis hiresbroads.
She seems to like tall, darkand handsome only.
So I don't know.
But speaking of Alexis and whoshe does and doesn't hire, we
(16:47):
got to talk about Mark Jennings.
I cannot decide if he is thecreme de la creme of side dudes
or is he like the worst employeeever.
I guess these two things couldalso be.
They're not musically exclusive.
So we see Mark walking aroundalexis penthouse in a robe.
(17:07):
He's going over to the tv toturn it on, about to have
himself a little brekkie.
I guess he's making too muchnoise or just his presence sort
of annoys alexis.
She comes out of her roomtelling him to be quiet.
She's got a hangover and heneeds to calm down.
She says this, mind you, asshe's picking up a silver
platter, clanging it around,making all the noise.
You can tell that Mark hasslipped in and out of many a
(17:33):
woman's bedroom, probably many amarried woman's bedroom.
So he's quite light on his feet.
I didn't hear anything.
His thick celic mustache ismasking his chewing sounds.
I don't know what she's talkingabout, but he says can I watch
sports news on the TV?
No, mark, tv turns on.
It happens to be Blake.
So this is where I got ahead ofmyself.
There's a press conferencewhere you can see Tracy in the
(17:55):
background, blake and RashidaMed, and Blake is explaining to
the world at large, how thereare these Southeastern oil wells
, they're going to begindrilling.
I'm not doing this on behalf ofa country, even though I work
for a country.
Doing this for myself.
It'll be good for all involved.
Blah, blah, blah.
Alexis can't believe this.
(18:16):
Like, wait a minute.
There's no way he is using hispolitical power to get ahead of
the game.
He shouldn't be able to do that.
I should have had a chance tobid on those.
So she feels a way andimmediately starts thinking
about how to get back at Blayden.
Mark in the meantime stillwants to watch sports ball, but
she sends him to his bedroom.
So he grabs a few extracroissants and some fruit and
(18:39):
some eggs and whatnot and hestarts heading to his bedroom
where he can watch his own TV.
Is he the K-Fed of side dudes,or I don't want to call anybody
a deadbeat, but I'm just sayingof men who are getting by on
their looks or the swivel oftheir hips?
Is he, did he hit the jackpothere?
(19:02):
Because, think about it, he'snot that great of an employee.
He's never really in the roomlong enough.
She stays kicking him out of aconversation.
She stays kicking him out ofher house or her excuse me her
living room.
He has to go to his room allthe time but he has the freedom
to come and go as he pleases.
I think he still.
He doesn't work a long miragebut he definitely hangs out at
the gym.
(19:22):
She told him last week didn'the have some muscles to pump or
something?
He has endless snacks.
He gets to go to the operasometimes.
He's got a lot of stuff to do.
I mean I think he's kind of gotit made in the shade.
Has he ever actually protectedher?
No, dex walked.
You know, dex don't believe indoors.
Dex walked right into her house, cussed Mark out.
(19:46):
He got sent to his room.
Like I'm like what do you?
Who are you protecting?
He got really lucky that onetime being in the right place at
the right time.
He got really lucky, hit thejackpot.
Because he's trying to sleep.
I don't know if he's up withFallon, that's irrelevant.
Anyway, phone rings or Alexisgets on the phone and Mark goes
in the other room, but he's notas slick as he thinks he is.
(20:07):
He's actually picked up theline and she can hear him.
She hears it.
Click over.
Rookie, mistake.
Everyone knows, especially ifyou are an elder millennial, if
you want to eavesdrop on yoursister's conversation.
The move is to wait untilthey're already on the phone to
pick it up.
You just have to ear hustlefrom the door If you want to
(20:29):
eavesdrop.
Back in the day on thetelephone, you got to be
conscious of the little clickeron the cradle.
So when you hang up the phoneyou can hear it.
It's little clicker on thecradle.
So when you hang up the phoneyou can hear it.
It's audible.
You can hear it on the otherend, you can hear it in the room
.
What you do, or what you couldhave done back in my day, was
you shout to the person hey, youhave a phone call and you just
(20:53):
hold the receiver on the in theother room Like you don't
actually hang it up.
You only shout so that theperson on the phone can hear you
shouting for the other person.
And then, once they pick up thephone, you pretend like you're
not listening, like do you haveit?
You wait for them to say theyhave it and then you just listen
and then you hang up when theyhang up.
If you really want to earhustle Not that I'm condoning it
(21:16):
, gosh I have to feel like Ihave to say this out loud I do
not condone shoplifting.
I do not condone blackmail.
I do not condone taking anextra $30,000 from your employer
.
I do not condone ear hustlingon the phone, unless, of course,
it's on TV.
Anyway, he's busted.
(21:38):
She calls him out and she'slike listen, I can hear you
slinking around listening to allof my conversation.
What do you want?
He's like well, alexis, I'monly listening because you are
such a smart businesswoman.
You see, I've saved up 20 grandand I want to make something of
myself.
I can't be a bodyguard forever.
I want to make something ofmyself.
So I thought if I just kind ofwatch you a little bit more and
(22:00):
pay attention to what you do, Ican do what you do.
She's flattered.
She's like well, you know whatAin't nothing wrong with making
a little money.
I understand that, but you gotto do it the right way, Mark.
Listen, go get cleaned up, getready.
We're going to leave for HongKong tomorrow and then you can
watch this money.
I'm about to make a lot moremoney, but I need you to protect
some money that I'm bringing.
He's like how much money?
(22:20):
I feel like she said that onlyso she could say this Much more
than $20,000.
And it'll be much more grand.
You don't have to rub it in hisface.
He knows he's a quote unquotebroke boy compared to you, but
is he, is he Kind of living thehigh life if you ask me?
(22:41):
But he does give off that K-Fedvibe Like he should hit the
jackpot.
Let me just, you know, play mypart until she gets rid of me,
and then maybe I could finaglesome sort of support.
I think that's the case in alot of things.
You don't have to outdo anybody, you just have to not make the
wrong move.
Think about Claudia.
(23:02):
Claudia is a two-time insaneasylum resident who is fully
aware of her emotions, fullyaware of how she's perceived,
fully aware of how shecommunicates.
She's keeping that in checklest she be perceived as insane.
There's about four people onthe show who are probably insane
(23:24):
, who are not nearly asself-aware as my girl.
She's trying her best.
So it just makes this sort oftelephone torment that much more
difficult.
So she's minding her business.
She's at the La Mirage.
Crystal comes by dressed in allblack.
At first I thought she had on alike a judge's robe or Baptist
(23:46):
pastor's robe all black.
No, no, no.
She just has on like crushedvelvet or something I don't know
.
She decided she's going to wearblack on black on black.
I don't know who she's buryinglater, but it is what it is.
It is a far cry from Crystaland Cream.
So she comes by to have lunchwith Claudia and Claudia's like,
yeah, girl, let me get my bag.
But she turns and she seessomeone from behind.
(24:06):
She quickly believes it'sLindsay.
Now I didn't think it wasLindsay because I watched season
one.
Lindsay's a 14 year old, verydramatic 14 year old, with very
light blonde hair.
I thought this could be a newface, new Steven thing.
I doubt she'd be standing inthe middle of La Mirage though.
So Claudia gets all besideherself, runs over to the girl,
(24:29):
spins her around and this is anyface Annie from Appalachia.
I don't know where this girl'sfrom.
She looks like any.
I don't know who she looks like.
Claudia quickly apologizes LikeI'm so sorry.
I used to know someone justlike you, right about your
height.
She used to wear dresses andshoes Like Claudia.
That's not enough evidence, butif you say so, crystal's
(24:52):
looking in the background likehmm God, I should have never
slept with Matthew and sent thislady to the loony bin.
This is a disaster, it's afiasco, but she keeps it
together.
I am going to skip ahead,though.
So there's a scene a littlelater on.
Claudia is trying to get somework done.
She and Fallon are in Fallon'soffice when the phone rings.
(25:14):
Somebody's playing on the damnphone again.
Fallon picks up the phone it'sfor Claudia, passes it to
Claudia, not even thinking twice, and then you hear Claudia, we
need you, darling, we're afamily, matthew, matthew, my
hips don't lie, matthew is onthe phone.
She immediately begins to freakout.
(25:35):
She's like Fallon.
Fallon call the cops.
I'm thinking on what line?
But then I remember this is ahotel, so there's other phones.
Fallon does that thing you dowhen you don't really want to do
something, like maybe you startmoving a little too slow.
You start reaching for theelevator button to stop it Wink,
wink, but you don't reallyreach for it.
You know the person is way toofar and you know they can't
(26:02):
really see what your hand isdoing.
She's running out the door, butit's a soap opera.
So she has to stop and swingher hair over her shoulder, and
right about that time Claudiaannounces that they hung up.
I wonder if Fallon's like oh myGod, I can't fire her because
this is my sister-in-law.
But we're going to have tofigure out something.
I can't keep having theseemotional outbursts.
(26:22):
I'm doing my own stuff here.
The calls to torment hercontinue and it's just
devastating.
Claudia's probably not going toget fired, but somebody did.
Alexis goes to work and inwalks this blonde kid I thought
it was Steven, there's a littleformal for work.
I thought it was new faceSteven.
And then he starts talking.
(26:43):
I'm like, oh, that's even newerface Steven.
But they replaced him again.
Like damn, what was going on inthe set of Dynasty?
Alexis says what is it Jason?
He goes, I'm not Jason.
Jason left last Friday.
I'm Lloyd.
So Lloyd looks like he could beStephen's stunt double or
brother or something.
She keeps a male staff and Ican appreciate that.
(27:04):
Well, while they're talking, inwalks you guessed it Dexter,
dexter.
Dexter doesn't check in, dexter, dexter doesn't make
appointments.
Dexter knows when you're havingan appointment.
He's going to burst throughyour doors.
Well, he comes walking in.
But he walks in with a gift.
Hey, foxy mama.
He says you want to go to LAwith me?
A little business for ourbusiness.
(27:25):
A little pleasure for ourpleasure.
I'm using creative libertieshere.
She opens a box and it is abushel of not a bushel.
What is it called?
A bouquet of lilies actually, Ilearned on this episode that it
is a corsage of lilies.
I didn't realize.
(27:45):
Corsages were sold year round.
I thought that was well, Idon't know.
I don't know if I knew that itmakes sense, as I say it a lot,
maybe for weddings, but I didn'tknow.
I didn't know.
People bought corsages outsideof prom.
Well, he bought her a tinylittle corsage of violets or
(28:06):
lilies, whatever the hell isscaring Claudia.
She puts them in her littlebowl and she's like oh honey,
I'm busy, I'm so busy, but youhave fun in LA with them, little
young bikini girls.
And he says honey, no, no, no,no, no.
I dropped them a long time agowhen I fell in love with you.
We're exclusive baby.
It's me and you and you and me.
Only she doesn't disagree, butshe also doesn't validate.
(28:29):
They end up kissing.
She also doesn't mention thatshe's about to get on the first
thing smoking and head over toHong Kong to handle some
business.
She keeps it to herself.
Stephen stops by the officelater and she just wants to let
him know that she's about tohead over to Hong Kong.
She apologizes, like you know,I'm real sorry that you and
(28:50):
Claudia are going through whaty'all are going through.
I know you went down to SouthAmerica and I hope y'all can
leave this in the past.
At this point, stephen's likemom I would love to but like
somebody's harassing her.
Hopefully it stops, I don'tknow.
She goes okay.
Well, let me tell you aboutyour trifling father.
Do you know?
I just saw your daddy on TVtalking about he bought up all
these Asian oil wells.
He didn't even give me a chanceto do it.
(29:10):
Stephen's like oh, that'sreally messed up.
We should have the opportunity.
She's like I know that's whyI'm going to Hong Kong.
And Stephen's like Mom, I don'tknow anything.
I know dad doesn't really snoopand steal, which I believe that
tracks.
The person you need to be madat is Adam.
She's not trying to hear that.
(29:31):
She's like it doesn't matterwho did it, it's done.
Now I got to go undo it.
Now I got to pack my stuff, flyhalfway across the world and do
something about it.
You know Stephen's looking ather and behind her he can see
the corsage of violence and he'slike where did you get some
flowers from?
She's like God, Stephen, calmdown.
Dexter sent them to me.
Oh, did he.
Now she's like man.
Anyway, I'm out, seems like allright, but I suppose he decides
(29:59):
to just sit in her office, ifI'm understanding this right.
Of course, there are scenesthat come and go in between this
, but he seems to just hang outin the office.
He's ready to get to the bottomof this because I mean, he
witnessed it for himself alittle bit on the episode where
he decided to go with Claudiadown to South America.
Remember they were?
Or here's the car, no sign ofthem.
There's a lot of wild animals.
(30:20):
I'm sorry.
We think they're gone.
I feel like I got to tell thisin order or else it won't make
sense.
So Alexis had made Laloid orJason call over to Hong Kong.
She wanted the best hotelpossible.
She also wanted Rashida Med tohang around.
She knows that Blake is on hisway back to Denver, and so does
Crystal, who's at the house.
(30:40):
Now, crystal's wardrobe is alittle bit different.
We saw her in head to toe black, which she doesn't really do.
She's sitting at breakfast themorning that Blake is supposed
to come home in this reallyweird sort of mauve, weird lace,
116 layer robe.
For no reason.
She's about to eat.
Adam comes downstairs and sheimmediately she's like hey, adam
(31:01):
.
She jumps up.
He's like hope you're notleaving on my behalf.
She's like no, I just got toget ready.
I want to meet Blake at theairport.
So Adam tells one of the housestaff I'm really hungry today.
Can I have a lot of food?
I'm really hungry today.
Can I have a lot of food?
It's like that.
Sometimes, adam, I hear you.
Yeah, sometimes, just give me awhole bunch.
(31:23):
Whatever you're going to giveme, give it to me like triple
Well, in walks, kirby, kirby.
And she is as giddy as she canpossibly be.
Something about her is off andI can't.
I'm like what the hell?
It almost looks like she walkedin from another dimension.
(31:45):
So she starts talking to Adam.
She's like hey, I did a littleresearch without the internet
and found out that my mother wasin an insane asylum in Bismarck
, north Dakota.
Now I want to fly over theretoday to still do a little more
research and see where she is,and I want you to go with me.
You told me you couldn't gowith me because Blake was out of
the office, but now that he'scoming back, I want you to go.
Adam's like honey, I think youshould let this go.
(32:09):
She immediately sort of flipson him Like why is this the one
part of me you can't take?
You can't take that.
My mother was in an insaneasylum.
You don't want to deal withthat part of me.
First and foremost, she lookslike she walked out of a
different dimension.
I couldn't quite put my fingeron it, but as I watch they've
got her in like a gray tones.
She looks a lot like the ladyfrom the Helen Keller story that
(32:30):
I go on and on about, a schoolmom from 17th or 18th or 19th
century Georgia.
It looks like they superimposedher face and hands on like a
black and white film, buteverybody else is in color.
It's whatever.
I don't know why they got herdressed like this, like
Wednesday, adam.
But this request for Adam okay,cool, I understand that you're
(32:52):
embracing all this, but thinkabout it.
Adam definitely has.
I don't know if he spent timein an insane asylum.
He has gone insane.
His father has two attemptedmurder, one attempted murder
charge, one murder charge underhis belt.
His mom has somebody trying tokill her.
Joseph tried to kill her.
(33:14):
His mother I mean her mom beingin the insane asylum is
probably the most mellow versionof their family tree if you
think about it.
That's the last thing anybodyneeds to be worried about.
Also, adam does not know how todo gentle contact.
He goes to hug her and he'slike Kirby, kirby, kirby.
(33:34):
He kind of grabs her a littletoo rough, damn, their tackles
are okay, honey.
No, no, I love you, I'll gowith you, I'll be with you.
So I suppose this morningthey're going to get on the PJ
and they're going to fly up toBismarck, north Dakota.
I hate that.
I even have to say this Do youremember when the Colby's the
other Colby?
That's another thing.
Can we just stop just for asecond?
(33:56):
When Kirby walks in the room,the maid says Mrs Colby, would
you like breakfast?
No, says Kirby.
I'd like to talk to MrCarrington.
There are too many people inthis house with the same name
for the wrong reason.
The very next scene is theother Colbys, the divorced
Colbys.
(34:16):
So you have, think about it.
You have Crystal Grant Jennings, carrington, carrington.
Technically, I guess they gotmarried twice.
You got Kirby Anders Colbyabout to be Carrington.
So Kirby Anders, colby,carrington.
You'll have Claudia Blaisdell,carrington.
Then you got this full Jeff andFallon, who've come in from
(34:39):
either skiing or riding horses.
He has on riding boots I'mgoing to assume that's what they
did.
They seem to have on a lot oflayers.
They get to the landing on thestair step and he's like would
you marry me again?
I'm like, oh my God, with this,here we go again with this Jeff
, this woman, you are a filler.
Jeff is like a delicious.
(35:00):
If you ever go to a party andsomeone lays out ritz and maybe
they put tuna, sometimes theyput ham, they put jam, you can
dress up a ritz any way you wantand it's delicious.
It's a nice little snack.
Probably never going to turn itdown unless there's a real meal
there.
Fallon wants a real meal,preferably a geriatric one, if
(35:20):
she can get it.
Jeff is you just need tounderstand.
You are the hors d'oeuvre, youare the doormat, you are the
denim doormat.
You know damn well the minuteand I do mean the second she
sees another man who is evenmildly interesting, sees another
(35:42):
man who is even mildlyinteresting, minutely dangerous.
His ass is to the curb but he's.
Would you want to marry meagain?
You know I'm a good dad and allthat.
You're too young first off,you're too boring.
Second off no, she don't wantyou.
She don't want you because youwant her, but she's like I don't
know, jeff, I think it could bewonderful, let's think about it
.
So you're going to be FallonCarrington, colby hyphen.
Colby, do you know howembarrassing that is?
(36:02):
I think you know.
I know the marriage clerk hatesto see these people coming.
Can you imagine and that's mything Everybody is married and
divorced.
Within two months Y'all breakup to make up, to make up to
break up.
I can't deal with this as amatter of fact.
I think you should.
Just if you're going to remarrythe same person.
(36:23):
We ain't refiling it.
I'm not refiling nothing.
I'm just going to put like astamp, just like a passport
stamp on your marriage license.
Get the hell out of here.
We'll just put a new year on it, annulled, in the next 14
(36:44):
months.
Anyway, I'm not going to keepdoing this paperwork, especially
back in the day.
You have to type it all outagain.
You can just copy and paste.
Absolutely not.
But it is my duty to reportthat they are entertaining this
foolishness.
Now back to Bismarck.
Adam accompanies Kirby toBismarck, north Dakota.
(37:04):
Oddly enough, kirby to BismarckNorth Dakota.
Oddly enough, she found asepia-toned cardigan to cover
her sepia-toned outfit.
I don't know why this girl isdressed like this, I can't
stress it enough, but it didmake me.
I came up with a theory.
Hear me out after this.
They go to a newspaper stationand it's taking a little bit of
time and she's a little bitnervous, so she's kind of
(37:24):
walking back and forth.
Adam tells her to relax.
The guy is a newspaper editor.
I'm sure someone had to stop.
Like he's probably talking toreporters too.
We did come in the middle ofhis workday unannounced.
So I mean it's going to take alittle time, adam's not wrong.
Also, they're looking for thisinformation by hand, I'm sure.
So that takes time as well.
Eventually the editor comes outand he hands Kirby an article
(37:48):
that explains that, yes, hermother was once upon a time in
the asylum there.
So let him tell it.
The mom, yes, had been in theinsane asylum, but she was
evaluated and released just sixmonths ago.
She was released as a sanewoman just six months ago.
So I don't know what thetimeline is looking like of
supposed assault tracks.
(38:08):
I'm glad I went back andwatched this a second time
because I didn't actually catchthat the first time.
It wasn't making sense to me,while Joseph would be like, hey,
let me go in this.
So Kirby's like great.
So she's released six monthsago.
Do you know where she is?
Like yeah, I do Actually gotthe address.
I have to recall that this is1984.
So I suppose rental cars werenot as luxe as they are today.
(38:32):
Or maybe Adam knew a guy, Idon't know.
But they pull up in a doo-doobrown beater almost a beater.
It's got this like gold andorange stripe down the side.
It is a typical 70s and 80sland yacht.
It isn't hideous but it's notnearly as nice as the other cars
(38:53):
.
It's very inconspicuous, Isuppose.
So Kirby pulls up to thegraveyard I forgot to tell y'all
that and she's creeped out bythis woman who's laying flowers
down.
And the woman says hey, who areyou looking for?
Kirby says she's looking forAlicia Anders and the woman
points over you know severalgraves over.
I'm now thoroughly creeped outbecause, madam, do you live here
(39:19):
?
She was a little bit creepy tome, madam, do you live here?
Well, she walks over to Kirby.
She looks a little shocked atfirst and this is an older woman
, like I think she's too old tobe her mom.
Well, I guess she couldn't betoo old to be her mom.
I don't know, maybe that's her,I don't know.
I don't know who she is, butshe's an older woman.
(39:40):
She claims that she and aliciawere friends and and that she
knows who she is because whenher mother was in the insane
asylum, she made this rag dolland she dressed it up and she
called it Kirby.
The woman claims that shewalked around with this rag doll
named Kirby and she went to golook for Kirby and her dad.
(40:01):
And she went to go look forKirby and her dad and then, you
know, unfortunately she expiredwithin these last six months.
This is all very sad.
Kirby even started having aflashback, but my trifling TV
loving behind is fixated on theword ragdoll.
(40:23):
Tell me why.
My next thought is when yourmom went nuts, she made herself
a ragdoll.
Call that thing Baby Kirby.
Now you dress just like the wayshe dressed that rag doll
(40:54):
little, dark and real creepy.
Ignore me, do not pay me anymind, but I'm sorry.
I love that movie and I don'thear the word river or ragoll
without hearing river, deep,mountain high.
It is impossible.
But yeah, kirby's mom waswalking around with a ragdoll,
probably dressed like the waykirby's dressed.
Now I wonder who she pissed offin wardrobe.
(41:16):
It's very distracting.
But the even bigger distractingtake is that?
Okay, now I need a timeline,because all of these things in
and of themselves don't actuallyrequire Joseph to expire.
Seems like that's kind of goingoff the deep end based on the
person he appeared to be.
(41:36):
But is this the big secret?
Like?
If she's dead, then who cares?
Even if she died a little bitlater, I mean, oh god, that
sounded really insensitive.
You know what I'm saying,though, like it doesn't change
the fact, kirby still doesn'thave a mom.
Yes, she was alive at somepoint, but she was also in an
insane asylum.
Is there another secret?
(41:57):
There has to be something alittle bit juicier than this.
I don't want to see.
I don't want to seem ungrateful.
Two deaths and a weird scene ata cemetery is is enough.
But now, kirby, she startedhaving these little flashbacks.
She could hear alexis talkingcash crazy about her mama.
Now she's in her felix, but letthe record reflect, there was
(42:19):
no lies told, not by alexis atleast.
I mean, yeah, she was having alittle too much fun with the
information, but I don't know.
It seems like.
It seems like they jumped offthe deep end.
Plus, knowing the story thatyou know, mr Brevere wanted a
couple more scenes.
And they're like no, not onlyare you not getting any more
(42:40):
scenes, we're gonna have you tryto kill alexis and then you're
gonna expire tragic.
Okay, speaking of alexis again,remember when I told you steven
was just chilling in the office?
Well, I know that to be a factbecause dex dexter comes
bursting through the doors alittle later on.
He's gonna walk into alexis'soffice.
(43:02):
But new laloid says hey, do youwant to leave a message?
I'll let her know when she getsback from Hong Kong.
Dex's like Hong Kong, who's inHong Kong?
Here comes Steven, real Stevenhead pops out of the office.
Like hey, dex, did you come byto leave my mom some flowers?
You want to give her someflowers?
And Dex was looking at him likeboy, I mean, yeah, I guess I
(43:22):
could.
Stephen's like oh, you're goingto send violets.
Is that your style?
And Dex kind of turns to facehim.
He wasn't going to say that.
But he turns to face him likeokay, what is this?
Or orchids, or whatever I wantactually.
Why don't you come on in thisoffice, dexter.
Dex walks in.
He's like what do you want?
I love it.
(43:43):
I love it.
This is a grown man with notime to play, so he walks in
this office.
And Stephen's, like your dadused to work for my dad, right,
so he knows Matthew Blaisdell, Ithink it's kind of funny that
you guys have the same voice.
Why do you guys kind of soundthe same?
And Dex is like I don't know,cause we come from the same
state, it's not uncommon, it'scalled an accent.
(44:06):
And Steven's like you don'tlike me very much, do you.
And Dax's like you know what,now that you bring it up, yeah,
no, I actually I don't.
Ever since the first time I metyou, I came off a trip with
your mama.
You, you was puffing your chestout at me.
I don't.
I don't like the way you lookat me.
I don't like the way youpresent yourself to me, sir, and
(44:26):
you know what I don't do.
I made it my business a longtime ago to not like people who
don't like me.
I'm not going to put in theeffort.
That's some wisdom.
I feel like that's somethingyou learn between the ages of
like 27 and 31.
You just understand.
It's okay Sometimes.
You're not going to mesh wellwith everybody.
Everybody doesn't have to beyour friend, you don't have to
(44:47):
keep up with everybody.
You don't have to be hateful.
You can be respectful.
You can live your life justlike good old Dexie Dex is doing
.
I don't like you, you don'tlike me and that's where we're
going to keep it Stephen's up.
Well, you better not hurt mymother and you better not be
making those phone calls to mywife.
Dex ex is like listen,whatever's going on with your
wife.
That is really messed up.
It's very lousy.
(45:08):
I don't do that.
Trust and believe I'm not theone or the two.
Goodbye.
So he leaves and we need toflip back to the moment.
Do you remember when I told youthat Fallon was looking at
Claudia like dang?
I can't really fire her?
This was kind of weird.
Claudia had got that phone call.
Well, the way it's positionedin this episode.
Claudia gets a phone call,she's freaking out, she's trying
(45:29):
to calm herself down.
Fallon is looking like dang Idon't know about all this and
then you see a man's beautiful,strong hand at a pay phone sort
of hesitates.
Then he picks up the phone andwhen they zoom out I'm like, oh
my God, I was watching himcooking and I'm like, oh my God,
who is it?
Who is it?
Who is it?
It's Dex.
(45:50):
What you're not going to do,dynasty, is have me ever believe
that's the case.
I think this is just.
They shot it that way.
So you're like, oh my God, isDex making phone calls?
No, no, dex is calling HongKong to figure out what hotel
his lady love is in.
He's going to go over to HongKong to confront Alexis up front
(46:11):
.
Now there's a lot to deducefrom this Number one.
It is quite obvious Dex is waymore into her than she is to him
.
I think part of the reason shekeeps Mark around is because
there is sort of this tension.
She knows that Mark wants her,she kind of wants him, but she
(46:31):
just needs him around to boosther ego.
I don't think she feels thesame way about Dex, but also I
don't know he takes this farmore serious.
I think, going back to sort ofmy opening statement, I forget
that this is about business.
Going back to sort of myopening statement, I forget that
this is about business.
Sometimes I forget that this isabout running these two giant
(46:52):
corporations.
When you think about a BlakeBlake allegedly was a Derek Hand
.
He worked his way, started fromthe bottom.
Now he's up at the top, whereAlexis has always sort of been
this carefree, wealthy womanwho's been in all the right
circles.
But it isn't because she hasall this business knowledge.
It's because she understandspeople, for better or worse.
(47:14):
She knows how to push thebuttons, she knows what rooms to
be in, she knows how to putthat ish on, she knows how to
make herself alluring andenticing.
She knows all the things.
So I forget that when it comesto business she is a little bit
behind the curve.
She may not know all the things, she may not know how to
navigate everything, but sheknows who to pick and who to
(47:35):
keep in her corner so that theright things are picked properly
.
You know what I'm saying.
She's playing a totallydifferent game.
I'm sure over time she willgain this business knowledge.
But where Mark is just to feedher ego and maybe put someone in
a chokehold if he happens to beallowed in the room at the same
time she's being choked, isDexter, just like her business
(47:58):
boy.
Is that what he is?
I don't know.
I don't know, but I'm here forit either way.
Is I don't know?
I don't know, but I'm, but I'mhere for it either way.
He's gonna be mad.
Mad because when Alexis doesfinally get to Hong Kong, she
did have this whole suite, whichMark knew about.
Because Mark feels more likeher stepson, who she just
(48:19):
happens to have to keep aroundfor some reason.
He's like hey, I thought wewere getting a suite.
He's like we are getting asuite, but this is your room.
You have an outside entrance.
You're going to stay over hereand we have adjoining rooms.
We have a joining door.
If I still feel like you needto come in there, I'll open the
door and let you in, but youneed to stay in your room and
mind your business.
Once again, she is sunning him,so so so she goes into her room
(48:49):
.
Everything is set aside, it islush, it is beautiful, it was
all that.
No sooner than she gets alittle bit settled in, walks
Rashida Med Rashid is like hey,you're so hot, you're so
tempting, you're also so vague.
What do you want me here for?
She?
Something about five milliondollars.
He's trying to get her in thesack.
(49:09):
She's like I'm too tired forall that.
You can just watch me sleep ifyou really really want to, but
I'm not gonna hook up with you.
I think they end up hooking up.
But I was sort of fixated onthe five million dollars because
there was a scene I left outwhere blake is talking about how
much money he has to raise inorder to buy all these wells.
It's something like a hundredmillion dollars.
(49:30):
But you know, one day out he'salready got like 50,000, $50
million.
He's just needs a few morepeople.
People are calling in left andright.
It's an overflow.
So I'm like what is she goingto do with $5 million?
I don't know, but I can't waitto find out.
In my haste I forgot to tellyou guys my theory on my girl
(49:52):
Kirby.
Kirby Colby Carrington, the ragdoll.
I don't really understand whereher wardrobe choices are coming
from.
They are very much a littleprairie.
But antique that's the wordI'll use.
It's antique Even from 1980,these are clearly outfits, in my
(50:12):
personal opinion, from 1860,1880.
So I started looking at her.
When I said her face lookedlike it was superimposed upon a
black and white film, film noir.
It hit me she looks a whole lotlike Wednesday Addams.
I'm not one for conspiracytheories, I'm not one for this
(50:35):
metaverse flip-flopping outsideof my comics, but I'll entertain
this thought what if Kirby'sbaby didn't actually die?
Hear me out.
Remember when adam was in thein the hospital, pooping and
hollering and carrying onpraying, confessing that he was
a rapist and all that?
He just wanted his baby girl tolive.
Remember when kirby triedeverything under the sun,
(50:56):
falling downstairs, ignoringpreeclampsia, sweating like a
bad fish in a in an ice bucket Idon't even know what that means
.
She was walking around lookinggray and and pale and and damn
near near death, but no onenoticed because there was a
second wedding of these freakingcarrington people.
(51:18):
Anyway.
What if kirby gives birth tothis baby and somehow Adam's
weird prayer works?
There's a weird doctor who'sbeen selling like boob jobs or
formula or something on the sidethat well, is dried up.
So she has to come up withanother solution.
So she starts stealing babieswho she could tell the mother
(51:40):
didn't want them.
So they tell Kirby and Adamthat their baby is deceased.
Only she's not.
She is sent away to anorphanage and it is immediately
clear that she is weird, thatshe has this strange sort of
creepy doll effect to her andall of her clothes are gothic
(52:02):
and antique.
The nurse takes a little bit ofpity on her.
She knows her mother's name isKirby, but she thinks that's a
weird name.
She knows that there's going tobe a Nintendo game and a vacuum
cleaner in the very near futurewith those same names.
So she decides to name herWednesday for the day she was
born and in honor of her father.
She just calls her Adam.
Wednesday.
Adam Sends her off to an asylumand every excuse me to an
(52:26):
orphanage.
The baby creeps out, all theother babies and this couple
from France has recently movedto the US and they need to
acclimate pretty quickly.
They're creepy, they're weird,they're wearing all black and
stuff.
But you know what this babyfits their aesthetic, plus
they're loaded.
They pay buku money for a babyand then, ladies and gentlemen,
(52:51):
that is how we get christinaricci's version of wednesday in
the 1991 film the adams familyvalues.
Or is it just the regular adamsfamily?
I'm just saying.
I'm just saying Somebodyborrowed this aesthetic and
listened very carefully.
Because I grew up hangingaround old people, I've seen the
original Addams Family a lotand the original Wednesday, what
(53:15):
was that?
Circa 1960, 1950 something.
She was a little more funny,she was a little more jovial,
she had a sense of humor was alittle more jovial.
She had a sense of humor.
Christina Ricci, millennialicon or she's like a, she's a
zillennial icon.
But she played the hell out ofWednesday and I love the new
Wednesday too.
But it is Kirby's face, kirby'saesthetic.
(53:36):
Isn't that the perfect formulafor Wednesday circa 1991?
Now, I did the math.
This show was shot in 1984.
That movie was from 1991.
Yes, I think Wednesday wassupposed to be about nine or 10,
but this baby would read as anolder child because she's so
stoic and creepy.
(53:56):
That's all I'm saying.
Thank you for coming to my TEDTalk.
All right party people.
Thank you so much for joiningme for another fun filled
edition of soap lore.
I thoroughly enjoyed thisepisode of dynasty.
You always need a little shine,a little camp and, between some
of the more serious storylines,join me next time as we jump
back into some vintage primetimedrama and debauchery.
(54:20):
In the meantime in time, ifyou're a beautiful man with
Elvis hips, you know, go for theolder ladies.
You get trips to Hong Kong,you're going to get stellar
breakfasts, you're going to getcaviar sandwiches, a gym
membership.
All you got to do is not sayanything dumb.
(54:40):
Stay hydrated, stay moisturized, mind your own business and
keep all of your drama on TV.
Bye.
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