Doubt Can Take a Backseat: It's Your Turn to Drive

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Standing in my first apartment after a major life change, keys in hand, I felt completely paralyzed by fear instead of proud. Could I really take care of myself? Would the money stretch far enough? How would I handle being alone? That moment taught me something profound about doubt and how it shows up precisely when we're ready to move forward.

Doubt doesn't arrive quietly – it screams in the silence. After walking through shock when life knocks the wind out of you, sitting in the wilderness of limbo where decisions look like a foggy highway, we finally reach reentry. That's the moment when it's time to stand up and reengage with life. And that's exactly when doubt often hits hardest.

This episode explores practical strategies for facing doubt during life transitions. We dive into accepting fear without being defined by it, trusting the right voices in your support system, escaping the noise that feeds insecurity, and the power of verbalizing your fears to strip them of their control. Remember – doubt doesn't mean you're broken or not ready. It simply means you care about getting your next step right. You've already survived what you thought would break you. You've rebuilt your strength through the wilderness. Now it's time to trust it, give yourself permission to move forward, and put doubt where it belongs – in the backseat while you drive. Ready to quiet the noise and make decisions rooted in truth instead of terror? Let's finish your comeback story together.

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Shock
Limbo
Re-Entry


Sound of You

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Is there a major life transition benching you?
I know you may be asking what'snext?
What's my purpose?
What if?
Because I've asked those too.
Welcome to the Start yourComeback Podcast.
I'm Toni Thrash, a certifiedlife coach, and I want to share
the tools and practical steps tohelp you create a winning game

(00:23):
plan to move into your newadventure.
Hi, welcome back.

(00:57):
You're listening to episode 88.
Before we dive into today'stopic, I've got something
exciting to share.
I'm currently writing my veryfirst book Start your Comeback.
It's packed with the real stuffstories of what it means to
rebuild your life, including myown, like the time I stood in my
very first apartment,surrounded by boxes, and thought

(01:19):
, what if I can't do this?
Yeah, that moment's in theretoo.
This book isn't justinspiration.
It's your game plan forrebuilding.
I cannot wait to get it to you.
So here we are.
We've walked through shock whenlife knocks the wind out of you
.
We've sat in limbo where everydecision looks like a foggy
highway and we seem to be inthis wilderness forever.

(01:43):
And now we're talking aboutreentry, that moment when it's
time to stand up, step forwardand reengage with your life.
Just when you're ready to movein comes a familiar voice.
You're not ready.
Let me tell you.
When I heard that voice loudand clear, when I signed the

(02:03):
lease on my first apartment, Iremember holding the keys in my
hand and, instead of feelingproud, I felt paralyzed.
I was afraid I couldn't takecare of myself, afraid the money
wouldn't stretch, afraid ofbeing alone.
I was re-entering life in a newway and doubt was riding
shotgun, shouting directions Ididn't ask for.

(02:25):
So today we're going to finishtalking about doubt, resilience
and how to hear that voice andstill move forward anyway.
So the first thing is is we haveto accept it.
We have to call it what it is.
Doubt doesn't show up quietly,it screams in the silence.

(02:46):
And when you're stepping intosomething new, especially after
a loss or change, doubt shows up, dressed as anxiety, indecision
and second guessing.
Ask me how I know.
That first apartment taught mesomething about that.
I didn't need to pretend Iwasn't fearless.
I had to accept that I wasafraid.

(03:08):
I had to admit that I didn'tknow exactly what I was doing.
But accepting it didn't make meweak, it made me real.
You cannot build resiliencewithout truth.
Own the fear, then stare itdown.
Number two your tribe.
You've got to trust the rightvoices.

(03:28):
In that season of fear, I hadpeople in my corner friends,
mentors, folks who didn't coddleme but who reminded me I was
stronger than I felt when I'dcall and say, hey, what if I
can't pay the bills, or what ifI'm not cut out for this?
They didn't rush to rescue me,but they did remind me You've

(03:51):
done hard things, you'll do thistoo.
That's what your tribe is forNot to rescue you, but to
reflect back the truth about whoyou are.
You need people who don't letyou shrink just because you're
scared.
But they can't carry yourconfidence.
You have to learn to carry thatyourself.

(04:14):
Number three escape the noiseand stop outsourcing your peace.
I can still remember sitting onthe floor of that apartment,
staring at my bank app andscrolling social media,
comparing my behind-the-scenesstruggle to someone else's
highlight reel.
We've all done that.
It was a big mistake, becausedoubt thrives in that kind of

(04:37):
noise.
I had to shut it all down,literally turn it off, to find
the courage to say I can do this, one day at a time.
You cannot build resilience ifyou're constantly outsourcing
your peace to Instagram yourmama or that one blog post that
says you're doing it all wrong.
Peace comes from silence, andsilence makes room for clarity

(05:03):
and clarity invites confidence.
Number four get out of yourhead and say it out loud.
Number four get out of yourhead and say it out loud One of
the most healing things I everdid.
In that season.
I told someone the truth.
I said I'm afraid I can't takecare of myself.
And they looked at me and saidbut you already are.

(05:30):
Sometimes that's all it takesgetting the fear out of your
head and into the air, where itloses its power.
When we give doubt a voice butdon't challenge it, it becomes
our narrator.
When we say it out loud, whenwe challenge it with truth, it
shrinks.
So write it, speak it andconfess it, because when you do,

(05:52):
you take the pen back, youbecome the narrator again.
You get your voice back.
Doubt doesn't mean you're broken.
It means you care.
It means you want to get thisnext step right.
Here's the truth.
You've survived what youthought would break you.
You've survived what youthought would break you.
You've rented the apartment Bigdecision.

(06:14):
You're paying the bills Otherbig decisions.
You've figured out more thanyou thought possible.
You're not the same person whoonce needed everyone's opinion
to move forward.
You're stronger now, wiser,tougher.
You've made hard decisions.
You believe them to be true andgood.

(06:37):
You've made hard decisions.
You believe them to be true andgood.
You've lived through shock.
You've endured limbo, thewilderness, and now you're
re-entering with grit in yourgut and wisdom in your bones.
This isn't about getting itperfect.
It's about giving yourselfpermission.
It's about giving yourselfpermission, permission to move,
permission to decide, permissionto begin again, even if doubt's

(06:57):
still whispering, because thistime you're not listening.
So let me ask you where isdoubt stealing your voice?
Where are you holding back?
Not because you're not ready,but because you're afraid of
being wrong.
Here's the deal.
There's no perfect decision,but there's progress, there is

(07:21):
movement and there is momentum.
Think about those questions.
I'd love to hear from you.
Schedule a coaching call today.
The link is in the show notes.
I'll help you quiet the noise.
Face your fears and makedecisions you can live with ones
rooted in truth, not terror.

(07:41):
You've already started yourcomeback.
This step is just the nextchapter.
You have permission to make thedecision, because we're not
playing it safe anymore, becauseyou've already walked through
the wilderness.
You've rebuilt your strength.

(08:03):
Now it's time to trust it.
You're driving.
Now Doubt can take a backseat.
Buckle up, you've got places togo.
I'll see you next time.
Hey, thanks for listening.
I don't take it for grantedthat you're here.
You didn't listen by mistake.
If you want to reach out, youcan DM me on Instagram at Tony

(08:24):
Thrash Until next week.
Remember, there's still timeleft on the clock.
Let's get you off the bench tostart your comeback.
I want to give a special shoutout to Country Club for the
original music.
You can find them on Instagramat Country Club.
You.