August 3, 2023 • 50 mins
Welcome back to the Stuck In My Mind Podcast! In today's episode, we have a very special guest joining us, the incredible Karen Gray. Get ready to be inspired as we dive deep into the topics of unleashing your value and embracing your journey. Our mindset plays a significant role in how we perceive ourselves and the world around us. Karen shares invaluable insights on how our thoughts shape our mindset and how negative beliefs can hold us back. But fear not, because she also provides practical strategies to consciously change our mindset and reframe our thoughts for a more positive and empowering outlook. We'll also hear Karen's personal journey, from being furloughed during the pandemic to finally starting her own podcast. She found her true passion in coaching and leadership, and now she's on a mission to inspire and support others who may be struggling. The pandemic has brought about a shift in work-life balance for many women, presenting new opportunities but also unexpected challenges. Karen delves into the importance of having support networks and trusted resources to navigate these changes and find success on your terms. We'll also explore the crucial aspect of discernment when it comes to learning from others, especially in a world where social media is filled with self-proclaimed experts. Karen provides valuable advice on how to trust your intuition and seek out authentic mentors and peers who can truly guide you on your journey. But it's not just about learning from others, it's about building authentic relationships and contributing to the growth of others as well. We'll uncover the power of the triad: having a mentor, a peer, and someone to teach, and how it can lead to personal and professional growth. Karen wraps up our conversation by sharing profound insights on the importance of self-care, trusting the journey, and the incredible impact we can have on others. She reminds us that sometimes, what initially seems like the worst thing that could happen turns out to be the catalyst for our greatest growth. So, whether you're ready to unleash your value, embrace your journey, or simply gain some powerful insights, this episode is a must-listen. Get ready to be inspired and join us as we dive into the extraordinary world of Karen Gray and her incredible podcast, "Rock Movers." Let's get started!
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(00:40):
And welcome to another episode. I am your host,
w i z e, And I'm excited to for the person
that I got coming on the show. She's a certified
coach. She's a fellow podcaster.
She's an entrepreneur. Welcome to the show,
Karen Gray. Hello. Thank you.
(01:02):
Thank you. Thank you. So excited to be here. So, how are
you doing today? Oh, I'm a tech is,
and I am doing well. It's beautiful here.
And, just love in life. Summertime,
So life is good. That's awesome. And that's just that's what I love
about doing my podcast. Yeah. Because I get to speak to people all over the
(01:25):
country all over the world. since I'm in Pennsylvania, you're in
Texas. So this is this is what's so great about
being able to do this and and and just be the connections
I've been able to make since I started my podcast.
So what Let's let's just jump right into it.
What started doing your personal journey when you transitioned from the
(01:46):
corporate world to become an entrepreneur? such
a great question because everybody's journey is different. Right? We all get here
at -- Different. -- these different paths that kinda coincide
I started coaching back in 2009, but I was
working with pageant girls. My daughter was in a pageant and her coach
(02:07):
had had a tragic accident, and we lost her. And
so I stepped in to help my daughter, and that just kind
of began evolving into this passion of helping people
and finally just reached a point where I loved
doing that more than I loved doing my job. And so I just found
a found a way to do that, and it just kinda
(02:29):
took a life of its own once people started finding me. And, you know, when
you when you have a calling on your life and you live a passion,
you can't help but see opportunities to do that all the time. And that's
really what happened for me. I transitioned from
working with the pageant girls into working with adults and professionals
(02:50):
in 2017. and then full time
in 2020. Awesome.
So
so how did your own adaptation, Jerome? Well, how did your
own adoption journey and battles with self worth shape your
perspective and how to help empower women.
(03:13):
Yeah. So when I was a
so I was adopted when I was born. So I've always
grown up knowing I was adopted. I learned like, super early on. It
was always part of my journey. And
what I discovered knowing that
about myself and and kind of going through coaching school and all the things
(03:35):
you really get this self awareness but reflecting
back, I noticed that the things that my
pageant girl struggled with with confidence and being able
to be judged and seen by other people as good or
bad, less or, you know, qualified.
my financial clients, also struggled with that, and it impacted
(03:59):
their confidence and that impacted their money. So these things just
began to just align everywhere. So
what I noticed was that, you know, we never
really outgrow the things that happened to us when we're children.
And so that became
this pursuit of I really wanna help people process
(04:22):
the things that happened to them and understand that they've
happened for them. And so I've used my adoption
journey and what I learned to help heal myself
to help others, and that has just become this this
total process of rediscovery for people to
truly find their value, truly find their worth, truly find their
(04:44):
voice, and be able to live life on purpose.
and it it you're absolutely right. It I didn't
I didn't have a purpose. I didn't know what my purpose was. And then
I I was furloughed from my job. I have
2020. Yeah. The big
shut down. And so I didn't have I didn't have a job. I was
(05:07):
home. And So I had
already been wanting to start a podcast, but I had been making up excuses. Like,
who's gonna listen? It was just me. Of course. It's always us.
Right? It's always us. is putting the doubt in myself that I didn't I I
said, oh, who's gonna listen to me, who's gonna wanna and so
when I finally decided to just sit out
(05:30):
of my comfort zone and do it. I found that I
loved it. This is this is what I love to do. I I had such
a great time Yeah. Just the the
at first at first, like, on interview and people, it was this.
I wouldn't do actors, coaches,
(05:50):
all different things. And wasn't until recently that I decided that I
wanted to focus more on the coaching aspect of it. And,
and the leadership acts aspect of it all because this
is this is something I felt that people needed to to hear. These
these are these are stories people needed to share with other people because there's people
that have been struggling with these situations. And
(06:14):
and to be able to hear somebody talk about it, That's
just me. And and just the response from people, when people will reach out and
say, I needed that episode. Thank you so much.
Alright. It's it makes a difference. And when you feel like you're making a
difference, you get to see that your mess
is now your message, and that's what's making the difference because
(06:37):
people see if you've gone through it and survived it, overcome it,
and become this stronger person because of it, they
can too. It gives people hope, and that's
really what our human existence is about. helping
other people and giving hope. What
in your experience, what role does mindset play in the success and
(06:59):
fulfillment of of what to with of what you wanna get
accomplished. Oh my goodness. I feel like
everything starts with our mind because it begins with a thought.
And when we make that thought mean
something about whatever it is, so for example, let's say
my adoption, So if I think about my
(07:21):
adoption and think that that makes me less than, then my mindset is
going to be built around the fact that I'm less than. So I'm gonna
see ways. I'm gonna be able to find ways
that reaffirm and confirm how I am less
than other people because I'm adopted or because I was
given up for adoption. Right? Whatever we focus on and
(07:43):
wherever our mind and our thoughts go, we will always find proof
of that. So, you know, our particular activating
system goes to work finding the things, the proof that we look
for. And so everything begins with the
thoughts that we have and the stories that we make them mean. and
our mindset. So when we can really
(08:06):
engage our subconscious thoughts and
have our subconscious believe,
whatever it is that we want it to believe, that then
begins to be the operating system that takes over. And so
our mind then focuses on what we tell it to. So if
I'm telling myself instead of being abandoned,
(08:28):
I was chosen. My mother chose to have a life for
me that would be better than what she could give me. That was
her choice. That was her intention.
So I wasn't abandoned. I was chosen for another wife,
and this is really where I was meant to be the whole time. that completely
shifts the whole narrative of the conversation in my head,
(08:51):
which shifts my mindset. And so You know,
just with that example, you get to see how
everything kind of focuses and revolves around our mind. So
our mind really the center of this universe that we create. You love it
or you hate it. You can do something about it because it all revolves around
your head. Yeah. No. You're absolutely right.
(09:13):
And that's something that was one of the issues with me at
first. It was just self doubt. It was me just having
not having the confidence in myself, not not believing in myself and
not thinking that I'm I was capable of doing this. And -- Absolutely. -- and
that I would, but it took it
just it was just something just hit and just being
(09:35):
able to sit down and and communicate with so many diff
different people and learn from so many different people. At at
one point, it became I felt like I was being selfish because I was
enjoying the conversation so much. I wasn't having such a great
time being able to learn from so many different people. I got to
to sit down and and and and speak to
(09:57):
someone that I admire, and that was, like, one of the greatest experiences
for me. So we we're
taught by a society that if we take care of ourselves or do things
that please us and serve us, that that's selfish. And,
really, when our cup is full and we've taken
care of ourselves first, we have so much more to give everyone else. It's
(10:20):
the least selfish thing we can do is make sure we're whole
and healed and healthy and full so that we can give more.
And that's something that we we don't we don't look at it that way. Yeah.
We we drain ourselves and and and expect
and expect for everything to
align. But if we're not taking care of ourselves,
(10:43):
if we're not filling up our cup, how we
expect it to overflow into other people's cups. Yeah. We
can't. You're right. 100%. We can't we have nothing to give
back if we're empty. So
by taking care of ourselves by choosing to see
things as working out for us.
(11:06):
I I loved to ask this question of my clients. How
many times have you gone through something? And
you're like, this is the absolute worst thing that could happen. I can't believe
that man broke up with me. We'll use that as an ex as an example.
Can't believe he broke up with me. I'm devastated and you spend all this time
mourning over this. And then later on, maybe even
(11:28):
years later, you can look back in hindsight and maybe
see the path that that person went on. and you can see that
was actually the best thing that could have happened
for you. Right? You were protected. from what
that person was going to do or who that person was. Maybe he was abusive
or maybe, you know, the path that he was walking was gonna steer you down
(11:50):
the wrong path from where you were supposed to be because the next
person you met was the person, and you would have missed it
had you been in that relationship. So if you
just consider that thought, that can give you the
support to think, yeah, everything that's happening
to me is happening for me, and it's for my best. I'm
(12:13):
gonna just trust it and and walk with the fact
that God's protecting me. The universe is protecting me. Whatever
I believe is sheltering me and putting
me exactly where I need to be. So that means where I'm at right here
right now is enough, and it's where I need to be. And I'm doing the
things I'm supposed to be doing right here right now. Well,
(12:34):
absolutely. that this conversation was supposed to happen. These things
were these things were supposed to happen because this message needed to be
shared. And that and that's something that I've
I've embraced so much. I've loved that fact that
I'm able to come and give people a platform and have them share their
stories and and other people benefit from it, and other people listen
(12:57):
for listen to it and be like, oh, man. This is a message I needed
to hear. This is what this is what I needed to hear today. because I
needed this. Yeah. And to be able to help people in that
way, it's it's a wonderful feeling. I wish
everybody would and Like I said, I didn't know. I wasn't in media. I
didn't do radio. I didn't do any of that. Yeah. And
(13:18):
once I got behind the mic and I started doing it. And and I finally
got the courage to press record and
then upload it and release it because it's it's all a process. It it it
takes you we record in it and and really
finally being comfortable with releasing it and
and sending out free to the world and it
(13:41):
took some time. It does. It does. It takes time. It
takes courage. But what if that hadn't happened?
Right? What if you hadn't pursued it with the courage and just
trusted that this was the journey you were supposed to be on,
there are people who wouldn't be impacted today in the way that you've
impacted them. And the ripple effect of that. The ripple
(14:04):
effect of what you've created by just trusting and turning
something like the pandemic situation that would that happen to your
job into this, which has now
impacted in the butterfly or ripple effect of that rock being thrown in
the pond is impacting 100 of lives, 1000
of lives, and those lives are impacting 100 and
(14:26):
1000 of lives. So the The ripple effect is exponential. We can't
even count the influence that we're having just by this
conversation and someone hearing a say
that you're valuable and you're worthy and you're here for a
reason and what you're doing right now is where you're supposed to be. Just trust
that. Oh, no. It it's definitely
(14:49):
the the people you meet now. Like, I've met some
wonderful people that have become their their lifelong friends now.
Yeah. And people that I've learned from and and and
then you I still have friends that prior to
me doing the podcast, I've always been supportive. Like, my friend
Corrado -- Yes. -- love this guy. He's always checking
(15:11):
checking in sharing my my my shows always supported me.
Every time he sees me shows, well -- -- crowd out. It's it's
those experiences, it's being able to have people
like him encourage me and say, hey,
dude, I love the show, but maybe you might wanna talk about this sometime. And
I and I and I and I enjoy it. I I take that. I'm like,
(15:33):
okay. You wanna hear it? Do you want me to talk about that? And and
I do it? And Corralis says, hi, Karen.
Hey. And and this is another reason why. Nicole.
I started going live is because the interaction, I get to have
I get to make this their show as well now. Now with the fact that
they get to be a part of this show and and chat
(15:55):
with the guests and ask questions or even comment. If they
wanna leave a great comment, It's their show now. It's
their part of the show. They're part of history now. So -- I love
it. Well, that's To me, that's been the best part
of being a coach and being a podcaster is the
ability to have that ripple effect impact. and
(16:18):
seeing people's lives' influence and changed,
not because of anything that that I've
done, but just the things that get to be done through me and,
that I get to be a part of. So it's very humbling, and I love
it. Love it. Love it. So thank you for this opportunity for sure.
Oh, you're a fellow podcaster as well. So tell us something about your podcast.
(16:42):
Oh, my podcast is called rock movers, and,
that came from one of my speeches. I was
delivering one day about really the journey that we all
have in life and how we begin to carry this baggage
and along life's way, we pick up rocks. And, you
know, we we flippantly throw the term out. You know, man, that woman's
(17:05):
got a lot of baggage, or that guy's got a lot of baggage. And what
that baggage represents are really the wounding. right, the things that have happened
to us that people have said to us or told us or
done to us that we take on and carry. and
they became they become super heavy, and we're carrying them
around and logging them around throughout our life.
(17:27):
And one day around the time that I
began going through coaching school and really getting trained and
understanding more about the the true modalities of coaching
and how to help someone really transition through
energy awareness and just the presence of knowing.
what I learned was I get to choose The
(17:50):
things that are in my bag, I get to choose whether I wanna carry those
around because you have the rock but that
rock, let's say this rock that I'm carrying around is anger. I'm
angry over things that have happened to me. hurt
feelings, broken relationships, whatever it is. Things didn't go the way I
had planned. Well, I get to choose whether I carry that
(18:12):
rock or I move it out of my bag and I carry the lesson
that that rock taught me because the anger came from
situations where I really learned I learned about myself. I
learned about that person. I learned about what I was capable of,
what I could do. So I choose to carry the
lessons, not the rock. And so my podcast is really
(18:34):
about moving the rocks, the heaviness out of our bag, and
keeping the lessons. And so I encourage people to become
rock movers and remove the rocks from your bags,
carry the lessons, and use those lessons to move forward but the rocks, you
can lay them down and those pave the way for those
coming behind you. You set the example for those that you are going to
(18:56):
influence. Those you're going to touch and those coming behind you in your path, whether
it's your kids, or those you're mentoring, or people that you just
touch. that path paves away.
And so it's about turning things things that
the the devil meant for for evil, we can turn them into
good. and use them for the good of all. And so
(19:18):
my stories about people who have overcome hard things and turned them
into good journeys and turn them into powerful businesses, turn
them into powerful opportunities, and how they've overcome
these situations that other people would consider a rock.
but they've moved it out of their bag, and it's now an opportunity.
And so amazing, amazing people on my podcast.
(19:42):
kind of went, a little stagnant when life got a
little busy, but I started it during the the pandemic. One of my friends
had a podcast. And she's like, you have to start 1. And
so I did. And I loved it. I love just like you
getting on and hearing people's stories and being
able to share their story, their
(20:04):
experience with people that they wouldn't have the opportunity
to me or people that, you know, are in my circles that wouldn't have an
opportunity to hear them. Otherwise, I get to merge those 2
worlds, because I have a a pretty diverse,
friendship and and business partnerships. Like, I have a rodeo
world and a professional world and financial world and a podcast
(20:27):
world and a coaching world. And so I get to merge and blend all of
those worlds in together. And, this those guests
show up on my podcast and have really powerful conversations.
So I love it. It's it's it's
talking about Iraq. I was widowed at 31.
(20:47):
And -- That's the clock. And, yeah, and then it was just one
tragedy after another. reeling that on my dad only to lose him.
My lost 2 brothers. Also, it was just
a lot of tragedies. Yeah. And I was angry.
Of course. That's a normal human reaction, though. How was that? There was a lot
of anger, and it was a heavy rock. It really was
(21:10):
not it. And listening to you break it down and and talk about it, it
was a heavy heavy rock. Yeah. And it took me a long time.
to to get that rock off of me. And
it took it took time. It took
It took me finally realizing that
(21:32):
this rock shouldn't be on me. Yeah. It it was like
I was carrying this burden and angry over some
things I couldn't control. And so to have
this rock, on me was like, oh, man. Just to be
able to lift it off and and and
and start really realizing, like, I have to continue to start
(21:54):
continue to live. I can't continue to be upset and angry and
carry this rock and have it sink and bring me down.
You know, I'm so glad that you shared that. Thank you for sharing that with
me. I'm sure you're listeners. Maybe I've already heard that, but I didn't know
that about your story. but I think there's something
that I didn't share that I wanna share now, if you will.
(22:19):
Oftentimes we carry the rock because the rock serves us.
Meaning, while you carry that rock, you
were holding onto the anger was the part of those people that
you had left. Right? You still had that emotion tied to
that situation. So during that time, that
anger served you. It kept you protected. It kept kept people
(22:42):
away. So it was a part of
your way to survive during that time. So
for anyone carrying a rock right now, that's hearing
this and they're like, I'm not ready to let go of this rock. That's
okay. That rock may be serving you in this time in
this space. but there will come a time. And
(23:04):
if you'll trust, there will come a time where you'll be ready to let go
of that rock. and let it down. Let get rid of
it. But not everybody gets rid of the rocks in the right, you
know, in the same time. It's not that carrying a rock is bad. There's no
judgment over that at all. So I just wanted to share that because
what you shared was very, like, that's really
(23:26):
tender. and carrying that rock for you during
that time was really important for you to carry and lay it down
when you were ready. There isn't a date right, when you have
when you're grieving and you're there's so much loss, there's not a
a right time to let that go. Everybody does it differently.
So I just think it's really important
(23:48):
for us to know when people are going through things. It's not for us to
tell them. You gotta let that go. because we don't get to say that,
but when you're ready to let it go, that rock will serve you in
the next place that it has outside of the bag. Just know you don't have
to carry it forever. No. And and it's it's
somebody it was somebody asked me, he's like, would you change
(24:12):
everything you've gone through? And I'm like, no. I was like, I wouldn't
wish it upon anyone. Yeah. but it's
made me who I am today. It's helped mold me to the person I
am today. So I don't wish
it upon anyone, but it's also part of
my story, part of what I was supposed to experience here and and and go
(24:34):
through in life. And so to be able to
have this platform and share it with people and let them
know that, hey, listen. Everybody goes through these struggles. this.
It's it's not easy. And just like you said, when the time
comes, you'll know when it's time for you to release that rock.
(24:55):
Yeah. It it wasn't meant for me to release it when everybody else
thought I should. Right. It was it was time for when when it was
I knew it was hot because it it hit me. It was like, it's
it's time. It's time for you to release it. It's time for you to move
on. It's time for you to Alright. And we get it.
You're not angry, but it's not serving you. Yeah.
(25:18):
The anger is not serving you anymore. It's time for you to let it
go and and and work on yourself and and get back
to to the path that you're supposed to be on. I
I I I couldn't. You couldn't say it any better than that. I think that's
so key is when we're in that space is it
serving me? Because if it is, if it's keeping you protected, and this is where
(25:40):
you need to be, because I believe there's 7 levels of energy. And one
of those levels level 1 actually
is a level where we go to really protect. We we would draw
in, and level 1 isn't add. There isn't one energy level
that's bad or good, but that's a place where we go to heal. That's a
go a place where we go to retreat and reflect
(26:01):
and heal. And sometimes we
stay there longer than we intended. but
there's not a right or wrong place. And, you know,
I'm I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm so sorry that you went through
all of that. but I love hearing that you
say that it's made you who you are, and that person
(26:23):
today is making an impact on other people. So you're using
it. All of those things is the lessons that you
needed to learn on this life to be the
person that the future you need you to be.
No. It it showed it showed me that
(26:44):
life is precious where time is is is
is very fresh. And that's something that when I started podcasting,
I took very serious with is that people. I
I wanted to create the best content possible
because people were giving me something very precious. and that's
and that's listening to me and and giving me their time to listen to the
(27:07):
podcast. So I decided to invest in
myself. I'm I decided to invest in courses on showing me how to
edit, do cameras, or all the all everything I needed to learn
about audio equipment, everything.
And and it's because I felt that
by them giving me their time, I needed to give them the best
(27:30):
quality of me possible And that meant investing in
myself, then so be it. Because
it's it's worth it. It's worth me developing myself and
growing and showing people
where I've come from, from where I started as a as a podcaster,
(27:51):
to where it was probably, like, 5, 10 minute episodes. To
now, while I'm having full blown conversations for 35, 45,
to an hour. And it's just a growth for me,
and it's just me wanting to make sure that my
audience receives the proper
messages and receives just the
(28:13):
best quality that I can give them. I love that. And I
I see that you've labeled this unleashing your value and embracing your
journey and what you said just now, like,
That's it. You've just summed it up completely perfectly.
That's what you that's what your life is. You've unleash
the value of these lessons and unleash the value of those
(28:36):
experiences, and you've embraced the journey that you've been given
and that is so powerful
because now you have all of that and you're taking all of that with
you on each step going forward, how much
more empathetic are you now versus the person
you were before these things happened? how much more sensitive to
(29:00):
other people's pain are you versus
before? Like, we we get to a place and
if we haven't experienced things, we can sympathize, but you can't
empathize because you haven't been there. But now that you've gone through these
things, you can, and it makes you
a better host. It makes you a better human.
(29:23):
because your scars can understand what other people's
scars mean to them. And so I just I feel like
that's the beauty of our scars, you know, the beauty and the
ashes and all the things that we go through. It's it's
not just that we have pain and get punished at all.
Those things teach us so much about being human and the power of
(29:46):
empathy and love and patience and just
holding space for some for another human that's hurting. And there's
a lot of people hurting right now. A lot. And and and you're
right. And it's being able now to
one of the best things now is that
we're able to at least be able to show
(30:10):
that a vulnerable side of ourselves that before
people will probably make fun of you or people would not would would
joke around all your your week or whatever it is. But
now, in this time, it's a great feeling
to be able to come on ahead and express myself and come on and be
able to tell how I feel and and not be
(30:33):
judged and not being called names and not be said, oh, this is
this is all your this is It's not manly enough for you to be doing
this. It's actually the opposite. I think it takes more courage, more
strength. You're more manly because you can do
this. Mhmm. And hold this space, in a
way that takes more courage than
(30:54):
embroidery than hiding because we're all
humans. We all have these feelings. You can pretend like you don't, but
we all do. We all go through things. So being able
to say it out loud and own that journey,
that takes true courage.
So I applaud you for that. I think you're way more
(31:17):
manly by being able to share it and own it and say, you
know, forget the naysayers. They really they're just hiding
behind their own pain, and that's okay. They'll come out one day.
And okay. So you're also big in in in women empowerment.
Yes. Plus supporting other women. Yes. And
(31:39):
What what is it now that we're seeing so many women entrepreneurs?
We're seeing women going out there and and really
take that leap of faith of, like, okay. I think I'm I'm gonna do this.
Yeah. I think the the pandemic has changed that for so
many of us. for women that were working
9 to 5 having to, you know, juggle all the
(32:01):
things to be in the office. So they had to get kids
to daycare or school, be in the office, and then, you know, they're
missing out on so much. to coming home or being sent home during
the pandemic and you're working around your family. And they're like, oh, I can do
both. I can work. make a living and have
time with my kids and be present. Even if I'm on a call,
(32:24):
you know, I'm doing a puzzle with my kid or I'm multitasking
and you know, being present. I'm watching my kids play
while I'm, you know, on a zoom.
or being creative and doing work at night when the kids are sleeping or whatever
it is, but women see that they can and want to have it
all. And in the past that just
(32:47):
wasn't possible, but with, you know, the new world
after COVID, it is. we can and we
want to have it all. We wanna have a family. We wanna have a balanced
life, and we wanna make a bunch of money. And provide
and for many women that are single income, this has
created so many opportunities, but also the unexpected
(33:08):
did ones because they've been laid off or, you know,
they've had situations where their job was
eliminated because of whatever has happened, so
they've been forced into it. And then they see that they're
really good. The downside to that
is many of us are really good at doing the
(33:30):
thing we're passionate about, right, our skill set but we're not good
at doing everything. And we become the chief everything
officer. Right? You know, the CEO means chief everything officer. You're
doing all of it. You're doing the marketing. You're doing the sales. You're doing the
closing. You're doing the branding. You're doing all of it in many cases. And
so it's really imperative, I believe, for
(33:52):
women to have support. And that's why supporting other women and
and being that person who connects them to
really precious resources, trusted resources of people that can fill in
their gaps. so that they can scale their businesses so they can
create collaborations and and grow in ways that aren't possible when
you're trying to do it all. You can't. we can't all do everything.
(34:15):
We're not good at everything. Find what you're great at, find what sparks
joy, and do that on purpose. And have support
come in to help you with the things that you don't love or the things
that don't bring you joy or that you're not as good at. There's no
shame in that. and that has
become just such a passionate of mine to see women get to
(34:37):
have it all. I love it. Oh,
no. I it's it's amazing. I have some amazing friends that
they're My wife,
my wife, for example, she is
she is
hustler. She's out there grinding. She she helps
(35:00):
she's helped numerous people
start their own business. And and and
she's just she just has that. She just has this knack where she
could she just can help people, like, set them on the right
path for them to start their business. And -- That's awesome.
And and and it's amazing to see. She's the one who who encouraged me when
(35:22):
when she saw that I was passionate about podcasting and all.
She helped me start my my production company. Eleming.
She's she's like, I see that you're very passionate about this. This is something
that you love to do.
how can I make this something that you love to do, and it
benefits us, and where you can grow, and we can build something.
(35:44):
And and she helped me start the LLC and and get
everything going. And it's being able to
have her in my life and the impact that she's having on showing me how
to -- Yeah. -- to do the to do this. It's it's just
-- And I love that she's she's doing something
that she's great at and that she's got you know, passion about, and
(36:06):
it's women like that that make other
businesses just operate better. you know, women like
your wife and the coaches that I've supported to
to launch their own brands and their, you know, that I've
supported to connect with other resource is with someone, you know, that's great at
building courses or they're great at doing the COO
(36:28):
and all the operations and procedures and this person just wants to
coach. So those collaboration and those, you know,
really key partnerships we all do
better when we get to shine at what we're really passionate
about. Find something you wanna do that you would do for free.
do it on purpose and find a way to make money at it. That's a
(36:50):
win win. Yeah. It it is. It's
it's being able to so the reason I
started the production company was because when I entered
the podcasting room, I I did it all. I I don't
know. I had I didn't know anyone. I did I did the research on
where I could release my podcast, what platforms were out there, what
(37:13):
what I needed, what was a RSS feed, what branding, marketing, everything.
Yeah. And so I felt like, okay. But let me
save people that time. Let me help them avoid those
first few lessons that I had to learn.
Yeah. and just show them, like, this is how you can do it. This
(37:33):
is what you wanna do. And -- Sounds good. So it's it's been it's been
a blessing to be able to to do
this because and learn and and at the same time, learn,
it's help me develop a skill.
I've now produced several podcasts. It it
it's giving me a skill that I can monetize.
(37:55):
Yeah. Well, I
think it's powerful women
are stepping into powerful positions. I think that's what the
the last few years has helped create
And, you know, there's also been a lot of people that have
realized that, you know, they were way too dependent on one thing. So people
(38:18):
are also diversifying. They're doing multiple things, and that's also been
a gift. You know, they see you need multiple streams of income. You can't
have all your eggs in one basket. the the days of,
you know, my parents started a job and worked for
50 years and retired and with the gold watch and retirement
attention. Yes. That's that's not the world that we live
(38:41):
in these days anymore. And so
it's it's really about having key relationships
and those relationships evolve and knowing when
it's time to to
evolve with them, I guess, is the best way to say that. No. Yeah. You're
right. It's the relationships I've
(39:03):
built in the last 3 years have been
amazing. Yeah. I've been I've been
to to it's taken it's helped me grow as a person. The
relationships I've been able to build because I've learned so much
from so many different people. And and to have
that that resource and to have that
(39:26):
outlet of of networks
that you you build of
people who who wanna help you
-- Mhmm. -- out of the kindness of the heart who are who are wanting
to see that you're serious and and see that you're
motivated and inspired that they're inspired to help
(39:49):
you. And then it's it's being a it's it's those relationships
that I I cherish. It's those relationships of of
Corrado is one of them. My man's snowman who he's who's stopped
by. He he's another guy who who's out who's been in
He's been doing radio for over 20 something years and to be able to sit
down and speak with him and learn from him. about the
(40:12):
etiquette of Reddit radio and and all this other stuff and being able
to to be a part of his radio show and and learn
and build up my confidence on on doing live shows
because he it's his show that also inspired me to actually start going
live with my show because it helped me build up my confidence.
So I take these relationships that I've built
(40:35):
very serious And and I encourage anyone who's
who wants to get into this realm and this and this media
and those are very important. Those those those
relationships and those networking parties. And I
highly recommend anyone to go some to go
to an event, go to a podcast, go to a podcast movement,
(40:57):
go go to these and build these relationships. Yeah.
Absolutely. I think there's there's so many books kind
of around this concept, but the power of who
Right? It's not necessarily what you know.
and it's, you know, not who is in. Like, I just need to know all
the famous peoples No. It's about two people who
(41:20):
is doing what you want to do. How
do you build a true and authentic relationship with that
person respecting their time, respecting their
gifts, you know, paying to be in the
room, pain to learn from them, or just, you know,
really being sincere, I'd like to ask you two I just
(41:42):
wanna borrow 2, you know, 50 minutes of your time and then
giving them feedback. This is what you told me. This is what I did with
it. This is how you impacted me. Right? People
love to help other people. They don't wanna be taken for granted, though. They don't
wanna be taken advantage of. So, you know, be careful with
what your asks are of people that you wanna learn from,
(42:04):
but by all means, be in the room. It's the,
you know, you become the the people like the people
you associate with. So put yourself in the
right rooms with the right people who are doing the things that you
wanna do, and you will begin to emulate them. You'll shop
like them. You'll live like them. You'll talk like them. You'll buy like them
(42:27):
and become like them. So it will elevate you to the next
level. That is true. Now you don't do that at the
demise of your, you know, your don't put yourself in debt,
but but right. Be make conscious good decisions to be in
the right places with the right people. It's so key.
And, you know, the power
(42:50):
of 3, I believe, is so key. I share this with my
clients. to be the person of
influence that you wanna grow into, I believe we all need 3 things. We
need someone to mentor or teach us. We need
someone to walk alongside with us. Mhmm. And we need someone
that we're feeding into and teaching.
(43:12):
So a mentor, you know, a a peer or
a colleague that we can go along with and then a
student that we are feeding, so paying it forward
too. And I think those keep us so
sharp. They keep us in check. They keep us
on the right path for our goals, and I also think they keep
(43:35):
us humble. When we're teaching, we learn more sometimes than when we're
actually just, you know, soaking up stuff. It's like, I learned this from my mentor,
but when I taught it to this person, I learned it in a new way
again. And so it's so key, but then to have that person
that's walking the same path you are to be able to say, hey. This, I
did this, and it didn't work. And, oh, did you try this? And
(43:56):
you know, yeah, I felt that too. That was really hard, but what about
this thing? Right? It's just so good to have that sounding board.
that you can walk life with, whether that's your spouse or,
you know, a coach, someone that is walking with you and holding you
accountable to you to make you don't give up on you
is so key. Oh, yeah. You're
(44:19):
absolutely right. That's something that's that's something I've I tell a
lot of people, get a coach, get a mentor, get someone who's gonna help
you, get someone that you wanna be in
his position or her position. You wanna see you wanna be like, they're doing what
you wanna do. So then get in that room with
them, get to learn from them, learn from them, and
(44:41):
see what it what it takes for you
to be that person in the room that somebody else wants to learn from.
Yeah. I think there's also with COVID, there's
a lot of people who are saying the right
things, but maybe not necessarily have lived that
path. You can go to Facebook
(45:04):
at any time or Instagram and see a 100 ads on how
to be a 6 figure coach. Yeah. how to make
10000 months, 10000 k months, or, you
know, get a 100 leads in a month. but do
you know if that person has done that? Have they lived that? Have
they done it on repeat?
(45:27):
Do, you know, where's the fruit of their labor? Did they just pop online and
they've learned this from somebody and now they're teaching it? or
is this their life? So just be careful too
of, you know, learning that people
will show you who they are, believe them, but make sure the people
you're learning from are truly living the life and
(45:50):
owning the things that they are teaching you, that it's
legitimate and it's authentic, and it's real. You
know, I feel like we have a discernment. We have this intuitive
instinct, trust your gut. Bottom line, trust that. If it doesn't
feel right, if it feels too good to be true, it probably is.
So just be careful of that, but there's a lot of good people out
(46:12):
there who have learned that you can follow and learn from. Those are
the people that, you know, you just wanna pour
into and support and love and then pay it forward for the others.
Definitely. Definitely. this has been a great conversation. Thank you.
Thank you. I love it. I love it. I think we're so like
minded on how we take our rocks and, you know, turn them
(46:35):
into, a lighter bag and lessons and And
really you can take your rocks and turn them into gold sometimes. So
I love that you've done that. But now it's time.
you get the solos screen and you get to share and and
let everybody know where they can find you, your website,
everything. Thank you. Thank you. I am so
(46:58):
excited to share anything that I have. You can find me
on LinkedIn. You can find me on Facebook.
but, I have my coach Karen Gray website.
And right now, I would love to gift for anyone that's feeling
like maybe they're feeling a little lost, feeling
like they don't have direction, or they need a little help because they're
(47:21):
feeling overwhelmed I have a free assessment. I would
love to give to you. If you will just
go to, Coach, Karen Gray, and request
information I will send you or follow me on Instagram, any of
my feeds, and ask for my free burnout assessment
I will gladly hand it to you, share it with you, and
(47:43):
provide any resources that I can to help you begin to
move those rocks out of your bag. and I'd love to have
you follow me over on YouTube and on
Spotify at rock movers. That's my podcast. So
Thank you so much, wise. I appreciate being on
there for the show. It's been a great conversation.
(48:06):
and I love what you're doing. Just keep doing it and paying it forward.
Thank you. Thank you very much. And, Corrado's we got Corrado's
approval. He's very he was very interested in segment. Thank you, Corrado. Love
you, brother. Appreciate you. Nice. Thanks to everybody
who's, who's stopped by snowman,
big Ben Sutherland, the 3rd from the BS Three network, which we air on his
(48:29):
network, Monday, Tuesdays, Wednesdays.
but, Thank you so much. This has been great. I I've had a great
time. -- It's been good. If they follow me on LinkedIn,
they'll see we gotta I have a lot of events coming up this fall. So
I would love to connect with anybody that feels led
to, come to retreat or virtual.
(48:52):
online events. I've got some great collaborations coming up this
fall. Oh, everybody, I will be sharing it. Yeah. If you
follow me on LinkedIn or Instagram or anything, I will be sharing
any of her stuff. So you will be you will be
definitely notified of when she has stuff coming out. Yeah.
And if you have an adopted journey or you know someone that is that's still
(49:15):
hurting, that's really something that's near and dear to my heart. I
would love to be able to help them and support them. So
but we're all in this together, so we're here to to lock
arms and walk this way. Definitely. But don't leave just yet. Let
me close out the show and mean you chat a little bit off the air,
but, Thank you so much. Thank you.
(49:38):
Alright. So time to, time for
shout outs. Big shout out to my real wise fan, Bobby J.
Brandy J. Love you guys. Miss you guys. Big shout out to the
boss lady, Feana. Appreciate it and love you. Big shout out to
everybody in the chat, Snowman, Colorado,
Ben, Facebook user. It's probably all by me. What's
(50:00):
up, my brother? Big shout out to our guest who's
caring great for coming through and and and sharing her her knowledge and
sharing her story. And as always, a big,
big shout out to all the essential workers out there. God bless god
bless you. I'll be safe. You know, your boy wise, does it? Peace
out.
And welcome to another episode. I am your host,
w i z e, And I'm excited to for the person
that I got coming on the show. She's a certified
coach. She's a fellow podcaster.
She's an entrepreneur. Welcome to the show,
Karen Gray. Hello. Thank you.
(01:02):
Thank you. Thank you. So excited to be here. So, how are
you doing today? Oh, I'm a tech is,
and I am doing well. It's beautiful here.
And, just love in life. Summertime,
So life is good. That's awesome. And that's just that's what I love
about doing my podcast. Yeah. Because I get to speak to people all over the
(01:25):
country all over the world. since I'm in Pennsylvania, you're in
Texas. So this is this is what's so great about
being able to do this and and and just be the connections
I've been able to make since I started my podcast.
So what Let's let's just jump right into it.
What started doing your personal journey when you transitioned from the
(01:46):
corporate world to become an entrepreneur? such
a great question because everybody's journey is different. Right? We all get here
at -- Different. -- these different paths that kinda coincide
I started coaching back in 2009, but I was
working with pageant girls. My daughter was in a pageant and her coach
(02:07):
had had a tragic accident, and we lost her. And
so I stepped in to help my daughter, and that just kind
of began evolving into this passion of helping people
and finally just reached a point where I loved
doing that more than I loved doing my job. And so I just found
a found a way to do that, and it just kinda
(02:29):
took a life of its own once people started finding me. And, you know, when
you when you have a calling on your life and you live a passion,
you can't help but see opportunities to do that all the time. And that's
really what happened for me. I transitioned from
working with the pageant girls into working with adults and professionals
(02:50):
in 2017. and then full time
in 2020. Awesome.
So
so how did your own adaptation, Jerome? Well, how did your
own adoption journey and battles with self worth shape your
perspective and how to help empower women.
(03:13):
Yeah. So when I was a
so I was adopted when I was born. So I've always
grown up knowing I was adopted. I learned like, super early on. It
was always part of my journey. And
what I discovered knowing that
about myself and and kind of going through coaching school and all the things
(03:35):
you really get this self awareness but reflecting
back, I noticed that the things that my
pageant girl struggled with with confidence and being able
to be judged and seen by other people as good or
bad, less or, you know, qualified.
my financial clients, also struggled with that, and it impacted
(03:59):
their confidence and that impacted their money. So these things just
began to just align everywhere. So
what I noticed was that, you know, we never
really outgrow the things that happened to us when we're children.
And so that became
this pursuit of I really wanna help people process
(04:22):
the things that happened to them and understand that they've
happened for them. And so I've used my adoption
journey and what I learned to help heal myself
to help others, and that has just become this this
total process of rediscovery for people to
truly find their value, truly find their worth, truly find their
(04:44):
voice, and be able to live life on purpose.
and it it you're absolutely right. It I didn't
I didn't have a purpose. I didn't know what my purpose was. And then
I I was furloughed from my job. I have
2020. Yeah. The big
shut down. And so I didn't have I didn't have a job. I was
(05:07):
home. And So I had
already been wanting to start a podcast, but I had been making up excuses. Like,
who's gonna listen? It was just me. Of course. It's always us.
Right? It's always us. is putting the doubt in myself that I didn't I I
said, oh, who's gonna listen to me, who's gonna wanna and so
when I finally decided to just sit out
(05:30):
of my comfort zone and do it. I found that I
loved it. This is this is what I love to do. I I had such
a great time Yeah. Just the the
at first at first, like, on interview and people, it was this.
I wouldn't do actors, coaches,
(05:50):
all different things. And wasn't until recently that I decided that I
wanted to focus more on the coaching aspect of it. And,
and the leadership acts aspect of it all because this
is this is something I felt that people needed to to hear. These
these are these are stories people needed to share with other people because there's people
that have been struggling with these situations. And
(06:14):
and to be able to hear somebody talk about it, That's
just me. And and just the response from people, when people will reach out and
say, I needed that episode. Thank you so much.
Alright. It's it makes a difference. And when you feel like you're making a
difference, you get to see that your mess
is now your message, and that's what's making the difference because
(06:37):
people see if you've gone through it and survived it, overcome it,
and become this stronger person because of it, they
can too. It gives people hope, and that's
really what our human existence is about. helping
other people and giving hope. What
in your experience, what role does mindset play in the success and
(06:59):
fulfillment of of what to with of what you wanna get
accomplished. Oh my goodness. I feel like
everything starts with our mind because it begins with a thought.
And when we make that thought mean
something about whatever it is, so for example, let's say
my adoption, So if I think about my
(07:21):
adoption and think that that makes me less than, then my mindset is
going to be built around the fact that I'm less than. So I'm gonna
see ways. I'm gonna be able to find ways
that reaffirm and confirm how I am less
than other people because I'm adopted or because I was
given up for adoption. Right? Whatever we focus on and
(07:43):
wherever our mind and our thoughts go, we will always find proof
of that. So, you know, our particular activating
system goes to work finding the things, the proof that we look
for. And so everything begins with the
thoughts that we have and the stories that we make them mean. and
our mindset. So when we can really
(08:06):
engage our subconscious thoughts and
have our subconscious believe,
whatever it is that we want it to believe, that then
begins to be the operating system that takes over. And so
our mind then focuses on what we tell it to. So if
I'm telling myself instead of being abandoned,
(08:28):
I was chosen. My mother chose to have a life for
me that would be better than what she could give me. That was
her choice. That was her intention.
So I wasn't abandoned. I was chosen for another wife,
and this is really where I was meant to be the whole time. that completely
shifts the whole narrative of the conversation in my head,
(08:51):
which shifts my mindset. And so You know,
just with that example, you get to see how
everything kind of focuses and revolves around our mind. So
our mind really the center of this universe that we create. You love it
or you hate it. You can do something about it because it all revolves around
your head. Yeah. No. You're absolutely right.
(09:13):
And that's something that was one of the issues with me at
first. It was just self doubt. It was me just having
not having the confidence in myself, not not believing in myself and
not thinking that I'm I was capable of doing this. And -- Absolutely. -- and
that I would, but it took it
just it was just something just hit and just being
(09:35):
able to sit down and and communicate with so many diff
different people and learn from so many different people. At at
one point, it became I felt like I was being selfish because I was
enjoying the conversation so much. I wasn't having such a great
time being able to learn from so many different people. I got to
to sit down and and and and speak to
(09:57):
someone that I admire, and that was, like, one of the greatest experiences
for me. So we we're
taught by a society that if we take care of ourselves or do things
that please us and serve us, that that's selfish. And,
really, when our cup is full and we've taken
care of ourselves first, we have so much more to give everyone else. It's
(10:20):
the least selfish thing we can do is make sure we're whole
and healed and healthy and full so that we can give more.
And that's something that we we don't we don't look at it that way. Yeah.
We we drain ourselves and and and expect
and expect for everything to
align. But if we're not taking care of ourselves,
(10:43):
if we're not filling up our cup, how we
expect it to overflow into other people's cups. Yeah. We
can't. You're right. 100%. We can't we have nothing to give
back if we're empty. So
by taking care of ourselves by choosing to see
things as working out for us.
(11:06):
I I loved to ask this question of my clients. How
many times have you gone through something? And
you're like, this is the absolute worst thing that could happen. I can't believe
that man broke up with me. We'll use that as an ex as an example.
Can't believe he broke up with me. I'm devastated and you spend all this time
mourning over this. And then later on, maybe even
(11:28):
years later, you can look back in hindsight and maybe
see the path that that person went on. and you can see that
was actually the best thing that could have happened
for you. Right? You were protected. from what
that person was going to do or who that person was. Maybe he was abusive
or maybe, you know, the path that he was walking was gonna steer you down
(11:50):
the wrong path from where you were supposed to be because the next
person you met was the person, and you would have missed it
had you been in that relationship. So if you
just consider that thought, that can give you the
support to think, yeah, everything that's happening
to me is happening for me, and it's for my best. I'm
(12:13):
gonna just trust it and and walk with the fact
that God's protecting me. The universe is protecting me. Whatever
I believe is sheltering me and putting
me exactly where I need to be. So that means where I'm at right here
right now is enough, and it's where I need to be. And I'm doing the
things I'm supposed to be doing right here right now. Well,
(12:34):
absolutely. that this conversation was supposed to happen. These things
were these things were supposed to happen because this message needed to be
shared. And that and that's something that I've
I've embraced so much. I've loved that fact that
I'm able to come and give people a platform and have them share their
stories and and other people benefit from it, and other people listen
(12:57):
for listen to it and be like, oh, man. This is a message I needed
to hear. This is what this is what I needed to hear today. because I
needed this. Yeah. And to be able to help people in that
way, it's it's a wonderful feeling. I wish
everybody would and Like I said, I didn't know. I wasn't in media. I
didn't do radio. I didn't do any of that. Yeah. And
(13:18):
once I got behind the mic and I started doing it. And and I finally
got the courage to press record and
then upload it and release it because it's it's all a process. It it it
takes you we record in it and and really
finally being comfortable with releasing it and
and sending out free to the world and it
(13:41):
took some time. It does. It does. It takes time. It
takes courage. But what if that hadn't happened?
Right? What if you hadn't pursued it with the courage and just
trusted that this was the journey you were supposed to be on,
there are people who wouldn't be impacted today in the way that you've
impacted them. And the ripple effect of that. The ripple
(14:04):
effect of what you've created by just trusting and turning
something like the pandemic situation that would that happen to your
job into this, which has now
impacted in the butterfly or ripple effect of that rock being thrown in
the pond is impacting 100 of lives, 1000
of lives, and those lives are impacting 100 and
(14:26):
1000 of lives. So the The ripple effect is exponential. We can't
even count the influence that we're having just by this
conversation and someone hearing a say
that you're valuable and you're worthy and you're here for a
reason and what you're doing right now is where you're supposed to be. Just trust
that. Oh, no. It it's definitely
(14:49):
the the people you meet now. Like, I've met some
wonderful people that have become their their lifelong friends now.
Yeah. And people that I've learned from and and and
then you I still have friends that prior to
me doing the podcast, I've always been supportive. Like, my friend
Corrado -- Yes. -- love this guy. He's always checking
(15:11):
checking in sharing my my my shows always supported me.
Every time he sees me shows, well -- -- crowd out. It's it's
those experiences, it's being able to have people
like him encourage me and say, hey,
dude, I love the show, but maybe you might wanna talk about this sometime. And
I and I and I and I enjoy it. I I take that. I'm like,
(15:33):
okay. You wanna hear it? Do you want me to talk about that? And and
I do it? And Corralis says, hi, Karen.
Hey. And and this is another reason why. Nicole.
I started going live is because the interaction, I get to have
I get to make this their show as well now. Now with the fact that
they get to be a part of this show and and chat
(15:55):
with the guests and ask questions or even comment. If they
wanna leave a great comment, It's their show now. It's
their part of the show. They're part of history now. So -- I love
it. Well, that's To me, that's been the best part
of being a coach and being a podcaster is the
ability to have that ripple effect impact. and
(16:18):
seeing people's lives' influence and changed,
not because of anything that that I've
done, but just the things that get to be done through me and,
that I get to be a part of. So it's very humbling, and I love
it. Love it. Love it. So thank you for this opportunity for sure.
Oh, you're a fellow podcaster as well. So tell us something about your podcast.
(16:42):
Oh, my podcast is called rock movers, and,
that came from one of my speeches. I was
delivering one day about really the journey that we all
have in life and how we begin to carry this baggage
and along life's way, we pick up rocks. And, you
know, we we flippantly throw the term out. You know, man, that woman's
(17:05):
got a lot of baggage, or that guy's got a lot of baggage. And what
that baggage represents are really the wounding. right, the things that have happened
to us that people have said to us or told us or
done to us that we take on and carry. and
they became they become super heavy, and we're carrying them
around and logging them around throughout our life.
(17:27):
And one day around the time that I
began going through coaching school and really getting trained and
understanding more about the the true modalities of coaching
and how to help someone really transition through
energy awareness and just the presence of knowing.
what I learned was I get to choose The
(17:50):
things that are in my bag, I get to choose whether I wanna carry those
around because you have the rock but that
rock, let's say this rock that I'm carrying around is anger. I'm
angry over things that have happened to me. hurt
feelings, broken relationships, whatever it is. Things didn't go the way I
had planned. Well, I get to choose whether I carry that
(18:12):
rock or I move it out of my bag and I carry the lesson
that that rock taught me because the anger came from
situations where I really learned I learned about myself. I
learned about that person. I learned about what I was capable of,
what I could do. So I choose to carry the
lessons, not the rock. And so my podcast is really
(18:34):
about moving the rocks, the heaviness out of our bag, and
keeping the lessons. And so I encourage people to become
rock movers and remove the rocks from your bags,
carry the lessons, and use those lessons to move forward but the rocks, you
can lay them down and those pave the way for those
coming behind you. You set the example for those that you are going to
(18:56):
influence. Those you're going to touch and those coming behind you in your path, whether
it's your kids, or those you're mentoring, or people that you just
touch. that path paves away.
And so it's about turning things things that
the the devil meant for for evil, we can turn them into
good. and use them for the good of all. And so
(19:18):
my stories about people who have overcome hard things and turned them
into good journeys and turn them into powerful businesses, turn
them into powerful opportunities, and how they've overcome
these situations that other people would consider a rock.
but they've moved it out of their bag, and it's now an opportunity.
And so amazing, amazing people on my podcast.
(19:42):
kind of went, a little stagnant when life got a
little busy, but I started it during the the pandemic. One of my friends
had a podcast. And she's like, you have to start 1. And
so I did. And I loved it. I love just like you
getting on and hearing people's stories and being
able to share their story, their
(20:04):
experience with people that they wouldn't have the opportunity
to me or people that, you know, are in my circles that wouldn't have an
opportunity to hear them. Otherwise, I get to merge those 2
worlds, because I have a a pretty diverse,
friendship and and business partnerships. Like, I have a rodeo
world and a professional world and financial world and a podcast
(20:27):
world and a coaching world. And so I get to merge and blend all of
those worlds in together. And, this those guests
show up on my podcast and have really powerful conversations.
So I love it. It's it's it's
talking about Iraq. I was widowed at 31.
(20:47):
And -- That's the clock. And, yeah, and then it was just one
tragedy after another. reeling that on my dad only to lose him.
My lost 2 brothers. Also, it was just
a lot of tragedies. Yeah. And I was angry.
Of course. That's a normal human reaction, though. How was that? There was a lot
of anger, and it was a heavy rock. It really was
(21:10):
not it. And listening to you break it down and and talk about it, it
was a heavy heavy rock. Yeah. And it took me a long time.
to to get that rock off of me. And
it took it took time. It took
It took me finally realizing that
(21:32):
this rock shouldn't be on me. Yeah. It it was like
I was carrying this burden and angry over some
things I couldn't control. And so to have
this rock, on me was like, oh, man. Just to be
able to lift it off and and and
and start really realizing, like, I have to continue to start
(21:54):
continue to live. I can't continue to be upset and angry and
carry this rock and have it sink and bring me down.
You know, I'm so glad that you shared that. Thank you for sharing that with
me. I'm sure you're listeners. Maybe I've already heard that, but I didn't know
that about your story. but I think there's something
that I didn't share that I wanna share now, if you will.
(22:19):
Oftentimes we carry the rock because the rock serves us.
Meaning, while you carry that rock, you
were holding onto the anger was the part of those people that
you had left. Right? You still had that emotion tied to
that situation. So during that time, that
anger served you. It kept you protected. It kept kept people
(22:42):
away. So it was a part of
your way to survive during that time. So
for anyone carrying a rock right now, that's hearing
this and they're like, I'm not ready to let go of this rock. That's
okay. That rock may be serving you in this time in
this space. but there will come a time. And
(23:04):
if you'll trust, there will come a time where you'll be ready to let go
of that rock. and let it down. Let get rid of
it. But not everybody gets rid of the rocks in the right, you
know, in the same time. It's not that carrying a rock is bad. There's no
judgment over that at all. So I just wanted to share that because
what you shared was very, like, that's really
(23:26):
tender. and carrying that rock for you during
that time was really important for you to carry and lay it down
when you were ready. There isn't a date right, when you have
when you're grieving and you're there's so much loss, there's not a
a right time to let that go. Everybody does it differently.
So I just think it's really important
(23:48):
for us to know when people are going through things. It's not for us to
tell them. You gotta let that go. because we don't get to say that,
but when you're ready to let it go, that rock will serve you in
the next place that it has outside of the bag. Just know you don't have
to carry it forever. No. And and it's it's
somebody it was somebody asked me, he's like, would you change
(24:12):
everything you've gone through? And I'm like, no. I was like, I wouldn't
wish it upon anyone. Yeah. but it's
made me who I am today. It's helped mold me to the person I
am today. So I don't wish
it upon anyone, but it's also part of
my story, part of what I was supposed to experience here and and and go
(24:34):
through in life. And so to be able to
have this platform and share it with people and let them
know that, hey, listen. Everybody goes through these struggles. this.
It's it's not easy. And just like you said, when the time
comes, you'll know when it's time for you to release that rock.
(24:55):
Yeah. It it wasn't meant for me to release it when everybody else
thought I should. Right. It was it was time for when when it was
I knew it was hot because it it hit me. It was like, it's
it's time. It's time for you to release it. It's time for you to move
on. It's time for you to Alright. And we get it.
You're not angry, but it's not serving you. Yeah.
(25:18):
The anger is not serving you anymore. It's time for you to let it
go and and and work on yourself and and get back
to to the path that you're supposed to be on. I
I I I couldn't. You couldn't say it any better than that. I think that's
so key is when we're in that space is it
serving me? Because if it is, if it's keeping you protected, and this is where
(25:40):
you need to be, because I believe there's 7 levels of energy. And one
of those levels level 1 actually
is a level where we go to really protect. We we would draw
in, and level 1 isn't add. There isn't one energy level
that's bad or good, but that's a place where we go to heal. That's a
go a place where we go to retreat and reflect
(26:01):
and heal. And sometimes we
stay there longer than we intended. but
there's not a right or wrong place. And, you know,
I'm I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm so sorry that you went through
all of that. but I love hearing that you
say that it's made you who you are, and that person
(26:23):
today is making an impact on other people. So you're using
it. All of those things is the lessons that you
needed to learn on this life to be the
person that the future you need you to be.
No. It it showed it showed me that
(26:44):
life is precious where time is is is
is very fresh. And that's something that when I started podcasting,
I took very serious with is that people. I
I wanted to create the best content possible
because people were giving me something very precious. and that's
and that's listening to me and and giving me their time to listen to the
(27:07):
podcast. So I decided to invest in
myself. I'm I decided to invest in courses on showing me how to
edit, do cameras, or all the all everything I needed to learn
about audio equipment, everything.
And and it's because I felt that
by them giving me their time, I needed to give them the best
(27:30):
quality of me possible And that meant investing in
myself, then so be it. Because
it's it's worth it. It's worth me developing myself and
growing and showing people
where I've come from, from where I started as a as a podcaster,
(27:51):
to where it was probably, like, 5, 10 minute episodes. To
now, while I'm having full blown conversations for 35, 45,
to an hour. And it's just a growth for me,
and it's just me wanting to make sure that my
audience receives the proper
messages and receives just the
(28:13):
best quality that I can give them. I love that. And I
I see that you've labeled this unleashing your value and embracing your
journey and what you said just now, like,
That's it. You've just summed it up completely perfectly.
That's what you that's what your life is. You've unleash
the value of these lessons and unleash the value of those
(28:36):
experiences, and you've embraced the journey that you've been given
and that is so powerful
because now you have all of that and you're taking all of that with
you on each step going forward, how much
more empathetic are you now versus the person
you were before these things happened? how much more sensitive to
(29:00):
other people's pain are you versus
before? Like, we we get to a place and
if we haven't experienced things, we can sympathize, but you can't
empathize because you haven't been there. But now that you've gone through these
things, you can, and it makes you
a better host. It makes you a better human.
(29:23):
because your scars can understand what other people's
scars mean to them. And so I just I feel like
that's the beauty of our scars, you know, the beauty and the
ashes and all the things that we go through. It's it's
not just that we have pain and get punished at all.
Those things teach us so much about being human and the power of
(29:46):
empathy and love and patience and just
holding space for some for another human that's hurting. And there's
a lot of people hurting right now. A lot. And and and you're
right. And it's being able now to
one of the best things now is that
we're able to at least be able to show
(30:10):
that a vulnerable side of ourselves that before
people will probably make fun of you or people would not would would
joke around all your your week or whatever it is. But
now, in this time, it's a great feeling
to be able to come on ahead and express myself and come on and be
able to tell how I feel and and not be
(30:33):
judged and not being called names and not be said, oh, this is
this is all your this is It's not manly enough for you to be doing
this. It's actually the opposite. I think it takes more courage, more
strength. You're more manly because you can do
this. Mhmm. And hold this space, in a
way that takes more courage than
(30:54):
embroidery than hiding because we're all
humans. We all have these feelings. You can pretend like you don't, but
we all do. We all go through things. So being able
to say it out loud and own that journey,
that takes true courage.
So I applaud you for that. I think you're way more
(31:17):
manly by being able to share it and own it and say, you
know, forget the naysayers. They really they're just hiding
behind their own pain, and that's okay. They'll come out one day.
And okay. So you're also big in in in women empowerment.
Yes. Plus supporting other women. Yes. And
(31:39):
What what is it now that we're seeing so many women entrepreneurs?
We're seeing women going out there and and really
take that leap of faith of, like, okay. I think I'm I'm gonna do this.
Yeah. I think the the pandemic has changed that for so
many of us. for women that were working
9 to 5 having to, you know, juggle all the
(32:01):
things to be in the office. So they had to get kids
to daycare or school, be in the office, and then, you know, they're
missing out on so much. to coming home or being sent home during
the pandemic and you're working around your family. And they're like, oh, I can do
both. I can work. make a living and have
time with my kids and be present. Even if I'm on a call,
(32:24):
you know, I'm doing a puzzle with my kid or I'm multitasking
and you know, being present. I'm watching my kids play
while I'm, you know, on a zoom.
or being creative and doing work at night when the kids are sleeping or whatever
it is, but women see that they can and want to have it
all. And in the past that just
(32:47):
wasn't possible, but with, you know, the new world
after COVID, it is. we can and we
want to have it all. We wanna have a family. We wanna have a balanced
life, and we wanna make a bunch of money. And provide
and for many women that are single income, this has
created so many opportunities, but also the unexpected
(33:08):
did ones because they've been laid off or, you know,
they've had situations where their job was
eliminated because of whatever has happened, so
they've been forced into it. And then they see that they're
really good. The downside to that
is many of us are really good at doing the
(33:30):
thing we're passionate about, right, our skill set but we're not good
at doing everything. And we become the chief everything
officer. Right? You know, the CEO means chief everything officer. You're
doing all of it. You're doing the marketing. You're doing the sales. You're doing the
closing. You're doing the branding. You're doing all of it in many cases. And
so it's really imperative, I believe, for
(33:52):
women to have support. And that's why supporting other women and
and being that person who connects them to
really precious resources, trusted resources of people that can fill in
their gaps. so that they can scale their businesses so they can
create collaborations and and grow in ways that aren't possible when
you're trying to do it all. You can't. we can't all do everything.
(34:15):
We're not good at everything. Find what you're great at, find what sparks
joy, and do that on purpose. And have support
come in to help you with the things that you don't love or the things
that don't bring you joy or that you're not as good at. There's no
shame in that. and that has
become just such a passionate of mine to see women get to
(34:37):
have it all. I love it. Oh,
no. I it's it's amazing. I have some amazing friends that
they're My wife,
my wife, for example, she is
she is
hustler. She's out there grinding. She she helps
(35:00):
she's helped numerous people
start their own business. And and and
she's just she just has that. She just has this knack where she
could she just can help people, like, set them on the right
path for them to start their business. And -- That's awesome.
And and and it's amazing to see. She's the one who who encouraged me when
(35:22):
when she saw that I was passionate about podcasting and all.
She helped me start my my production company. Eleming.
She's she's like, I see that you're very passionate about this. This is something
that you love to do.
how can I make this something that you love to do, and it
benefits us, and where you can grow, and we can build something.
(35:44):
And and she helped me start the LLC and and get
everything going. And it's being able to
have her in my life and the impact that she's having on showing me how
to -- Yeah. -- to do the to do this. It's it's just
-- And I love that she's she's doing something
that she's great at and that she's got you know, passion about, and
(36:06):
it's women like that that make other
businesses just operate better. you know, women like
your wife and the coaches that I've supported to
to launch their own brands and their, you know, that I've
supported to connect with other resource is with someone, you know, that's great at
building courses or they're great at doing the COO
(36:28):
and all the operations and procedures and this person just wants to
coach. So those collaboration and those, you know,
really key partnerships we all do
better when we get to shine at what we're really passionate
about. Find something you wanna do that you would do for free.
do it on purpose and find a way to make money at it. That's a
(36:50):
win win. Yeah. It it is. It's
it's being able to so the reason I
started the production company was because when I entered
the podcasting room, I I did it all. I I don't
know. I had I didn't know anyone. I did I did the research on
where I could release my podcast, what platforms were out there, what
(37:13):
what I needed, what was a RSS feed, what branding, marketing, everything.
Yeah. And so I felt like, okay. But let me
save people that time. Let me help them avoid those
first few lessons that I had to learn.
Yeah. and just show them, like, this is how you can do it. This
(37:33):
is what you wanna do. And -- Sounds good. So it's it's been it's been
a blessing to be able to to do
this because and learn and and at the same time, learn,
it's help me develop a skill.
I've now produced several podcasts. It it
it's giving me a skill that I can monetize.
(37:55):
Yeah. Well, I
think it's powerful women
are stepping into powerful positions. I think that's what the
the last few years has helped create
And, you know, there's also been a lot of people that have
realized that, you know, they were way too dependent on one thing. So people
(38:18):
are also diversifying. They're doing multiple things, and that's also been
a gift. You know, they see you need multiple streams of income. You can't
have all your eggs in one basket. the the days of,
you know, my parents started a job and worked for
50 years and retired and with the gold watch and retirement
attention. Yes. That's that's not the world that we live
(38:41):
in these days anymore. And so
it's it's really about having key relationships
and those relationships evolve and knowing when
it's time to to
evolve with them, I guess, is the best way to say that. No. Yeah. You're
right. It's the relationships I've
(39:03):
built in the last 3 years have been
amazing. Yeah. I've been I've been
to to it's taken it's helped me grow as a person. The
relationships I've been able to build because I've learned so much
from so many different people. And and to have
that that resource and to have that
(39:26):
outlet of of networks
that you you build of
people who who wanna help you
-- Mhmm. -- out of the kindness of the heart who are who are wanting
to see that you're serious and and see that you're
motivated and inspired that they're inspired to help
(39:49):
you. And then it's it's being a it's it's those relationships
that I I cherish. It's those relationships of of
Corrado is one of them. My man's snowman who he's who's stopped
by. He he's another guy who who's out who's been in
He's been doing radio for over 20 something years and to be able to sit
down and speak with him and learn from him. about the
(40:12):
etiquette of Reddit radio and and all this other stuff and being able
to to be a part of his radio show and and learn
and build up my confidence on on doing live shows
because he it's his show that also inspired me to actually start going
live with my show because it helped me build up my confidence.
So I take these relationships that I've built
(40:35):
very serious And and I encourage anyone who's
who wants to get into this realm and this and this media
and those are very important. Those those those
relationships and those networking parties. And I
highly recommend anyone to go some to go
to an event, go to a podcast, go to a podcast movement,
(40:57):
go go to these and build these relationships. Yeah.
Absolutely. I think there's there's so many books kind
of around this concept, but the power of who
Right? It's not necessarily what you know.
and it's, you know, not who is in. Like, I just need to know all
the famous peoples No. It's about two people who
(41:20):
is doing what you want to do. How
do you build a true and authentic relationship with that
person respecting their time, respecting their
gifts, you know, paying to be in the
room, pain to learn from them, or just, you know,
really being sincere, I'd like to ask you two I just
(41:42):
wanna borrow 2, you know, 50 minutes of your time and then
giving them feedback. This is what you told me. This is what I did with
it. This is how you impacted me. Right? People
love to help other people. They don't wanna be taken for granted, though. They don't
wanna be taken advantage of. So, you know, be careful with
what your asks are of people that you wanna learn from,
(42:04):
but by all means, be in the room. It's the,
you know, you become the the people like the people
you associate with. So put yourself in the
right rooms with the right people who are doing the things that you
wanna do, and you will begin to emulate them. You'll shop
like them. You'll live like them. You'll talk like them. You'll buy like them
(42:27):
and become like them. So it will elevate you to the next
level. That is true. Now you don't do that at the
demise of your, you know, your don't put yourself in debt,
but but right. Be make conscious good decisions to be in
the right places with the right people. It's so key.
And, you know, the power
(42:50):
of 3, I believe, is so key. I share this with my
clients. to be the person of
influence that you wanna grow into, I believe we all need 3 things. We
need someone to mentor or teach us. We need
someone to walk alongside with us. Mhmm. And we need someone
that we're feeding into and teaching.
(43:12):
So a mentor, you know, a a peer or
a colleague that we can go along with and then a
student that we are feeding, so paying it forward
too. And I think those keep us so
sharp. They keep us in check. They keep us
on the right path for our goals, and I also think they keep
(43:35):
us humble. When we're teaching, we learn more sometimes than when we're
actually just, you know, soaking up stuff. It's like, I learned this from my mentor,
but when I taught it to this person, I learned it in a new way
again. And so it's so key, but then to have that person
that's walking the same path you are to be able to say, hey. This, I
did this, and it didn't work. And, oh, did you try this? And
(43:56):
you know, yeah, I felt that too. That was really hard, but what about
this thing? Right? It's just so good to have that sounding board.
that you can walk life with, whether that's your spouse or,
you know, a coach, someone that is walking with you and holding you
accountable to you to make you don't give up on you
is so key. Oh, yeah. You're
(44:19):
absolutely right. That's something that's that's something I've I tell a
lot of people, get a coach, get a mentor, get someone who's gonna help
you, get someone that you wanna be in
his position or her position. You wanna see you wanna be like, they're doing what
you wanna do. So then get in that room with
them, get to learn from them, learn from them, and
(44:41):
see what it what it takes for you
to be that person in the room that somebody else wants to learn from.
Yeah. I think there's also with COVID, there's
a lot of people who are saying the right
things, but maybe not necessarily have lived that
path. You can go to Facebook
(45:04):
at any time or Instagram and see a 100 ads on how
to be a 6 figure coach. Yeah. how to make
10000 months, 10000 k months, or, you
know, get a 100 leads in a month. but do
you know if that person has done that? Have they lived that? Have
they done it on repeat?
(45:27):
Do, you know, where's the fruit of their labor? Did they just pop online and
they've learned this from somebody and now they're teaching it? or
is this their life? So just be careful too
of, you know, learning that people
will show you who they are, believe them, but make sure the people
you're learning from are truly living the life and
(45:50):
owning the things that they are teaching you, that it's
legitimate and it's authentic, and it's real. You
know, I feel like we have a discernment. We have this intuitive
instinct, trust your gut. Bottom line, trust that. If it doesn't
feel right, if it feels too good to be true, it probably is.
So just be careful of that, but there's a lot of good people out
(46:12):
there who have learned that you can follow and learn from. Those are
the people that, you know, you just wanna pour
into and support and love and then pay it forward for the others.
Definitely. Definitely. this has been a great conversation. Thank you.
Thank you. I love it. I love it. I think we're so like
minded on how we take our rocks and, you know, turn them
(46:35):
into, a lighter bag and lessons and And
really you can take your rocks and turn them into gold sometimes. So
I love that you've done that. But now it's time.
you get the solos screen and you get to share and and
let everybody know where they can find you, your website,
everything. Thank you. Thank you. I am so
(46:58):
excited to share anything that I have. You can find me
on LinkedIn. You can find me on Facebook.
but, I have my coach Karen Gray website.
And right now, I would love to gift for anyone that's feeling
like maybe they're feeling a little lost, feeling
like they don't have direction, or they need a little help because they're
(47:21):
feeling overwhelmed I have a free assessment. I would
love to give to you. If you will just
go to, Coach, Karen Gray, and request
information I will send you or follow me on Instagram, any of
my feeds, and ask for my free burnout assessment
I will gladly hand it to you, share it with you, and
(47:43):
provide any resources that I can to help you begin to
move those rocks out of your bag. and I'd love to have
you follow me over on YouTube and on
Spotify at rock movers. That's my podcast. So
Thank you so much, wise. I appreciate being on
there for the show. It's been a great conversation.
(48:06):
and I love what you're doing. Just keep doing it and paying it forward.
Thank you. Thank you very much. And, Corrado's we got Corrado's
approval. He's very he was very interested in segment. Thank you, Corrado. Love
you, brother. Appreciate you. Nice. Thanks to everybody
who's, who's stopped by snowman,
big Ben Sutherland, the 3rd from the BS Three network, which we air on his
(48:29):
network, Monday, Tuesdays, Wednesdays.
but, Thank you so much. This has been great. I I've had a great
time. -- It's been good. If they follow me on LinkedIn,
they'll see we gotta I have a lot of events coming up this fall. So
I would love to connect with anybody that feels led
to, come to retreat or virtual.
(48:52):
online events. I've got some great collaborations coming up this
fall. Oh, everybody, I will be sharing it. Yeah. If you
follow me on LinkedIn or Instagram or anything, I will be sharing
any of her stuff. So you will be you will be
definitely notified of when she has stuff coming out. Yeah.
And if you have an adopted journey or you know someone that is that's still
(49:15):
hurting, that's really something that's near and dear to my heart. I
would love to be able to help them and support them. So
but we're all in this together, so we're here to to lock
arms and walk this way. Definitely. But don't leave just yet. Let
me close out the show and mean you chat a little bit off the air,
but, Thank you so much. Thank you.
(49:38):
Alright. So time to, time for
shout outs. Big shout out to my real wise fan, Bobby J.
Brandy J. Love you guys. Miss you guys. Big shout out to the
boss lady, Feana. Appreciate it and love you. Big shout out to
everybody in the chat, Snowman, Colorado,
Ben, Facebook user. It's probably all by me. What's
(50:00):
up, my brother? Big shout out to our guest who's
caring great for coming through and and and sharing her her knowledge and
sharing her story. And as always, a big,
big shout out to all the essential workers out there. God bless god
bless you. I'll be safe. You know, your boy wise, does it? Peace
out.
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