August 13, 2024 • 12 mins
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In any group of connections be it business, friendships, or otherwise, there are 3 kinds of people: visionaries, fence-sitters, and resistors. Which one are you? What dynamics do you have in your friend group? What dynamics do you have in your salon, or with your clients?
Who are you in this scenario? Are there people in your circle that shouldn't be there anymore? We are carefully curating our circle these days. Check your own mindset and know who belongs there.
I offer 1-to-1 training to help you find the systems, train the people, make it work and provide the best customer service in your salon. Send me a DM on Instagram to learn more! https://www.instagram.com/patricestar
Find out more about Patrice's courses and faves on her website https://www.thedesignstudiomd.com/
Music credit: LA Nightlife by Full Frontal Audio
A Subito Media production
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Patrice B (00:40):
Welcome back y'all to that most randomest podcast
ever.
I am back y'all.
Let me tell you something.
I don't know if y'all noticedbut this shit's therapeutic for
me.
I love some of y'all.
I hope y'all appreciate itbecause some of the things I
share with y'all, I share in thesalon.
I'm sharing it with friends.
So I be feeling like I'm gonnashare it with the world.
So if you know somebody who beneeding some of these words, you
(01:03):
might be in this situationsharing.
Share it with your friend.
Let's talk about it.
Let's chat about it.
But I'm going to tell yousomething in this season, I
learned about your goddamn self.
You've learned about others aswell.
Am I new?
It's not new.
I shouldn't even make that shitup.
It ain't new.
Right.
But when it comes to me and whoI choose to have in my space
(01:28):
right now, you gotta look atyour dynamic, right?
And that dynamic of yourfriendship.
And that dynamic is foreverevolving, but sometimes we want
to keep it the same out ofcomfort, right?
And so like everything, when itcomes to connections, people,
yes, it is still businessrelated to me.
(01:49):
And that's how I process itbecause you learn things on
either side of the water.
Even in relationships, you canapply something to business.
But in this situation, when I,was going around into different
salons and I'm teaching classes.
One of the things that we ineducation to learn how to
educate is being aware of youraudience, being aware of who is
(02:11):
going to be in this class or thetypes of people in this class,
right?
So they labeled them as threedifferent things.
And this also applies to yourdamn friendships and people in
your life, right?
So be aware of this.
You got three different types.
You got those visionaries, yougot a fence setter, and you got
a resistor.
(02:32):
Now, first of all, you probablyneed to indicate who the hell
you are and these connections.
What type of person are you?
Are you a visionary who sees allthe possibilities, right?
More positive spirit, go getter.
Um, willing to learn somethingnew, take accountability for the
actions, right?
(02:54):
Then you have your fence sitterand the fence sitter, like in a
classroom, they'll be the personthat goes either way.
They're not positive.
They'll go with whoever'sswaying them at the moment,
right?
And not too much of a voicestays quiet, chill.
And then you have your resistor.
(03:15):
And in the classroom, theresistor is almost like that
squeaky wheel that needsattention.
But they tend to resist things.
They think that they know itall.
They know it all before you evengot there.
They want to be combativesometimes in the classroom, or
they, they have to be like,everything is a battle and the
(03:38):
attention needs to be on them.
And a lot of times that persontends to have a very strong
personality that can take yourclass far left.
Okay.
usually they also in yourworkplace that'll bring down the
environment.
Always negative.
Always got something going on.
Mouth is always open andprobably hardly ever.
Right.
but the interesting thing is, isthat that happens in your
(04:00):
friendship circles as well.
You have those friends that aredoing a thing and they're super
positive.
They're making things happen.
You had that friend and justlike, Hey, I'm gonna go with
whatever the crowd does.
No real opinions.
Um, yeah.
Tends to be pretty quiet, chill,good with whatever.
(04:22):
And then you had that one friendthat's always in the shit.
That can turn your night left.
Um, piss poor energy andsometimes just don't try to
cover it up like they're not theone.
They like a mean girl.
They tend to be like the meangirl.
And they want to get people ontheir team.
To make it seem like everythingis bad.
But you gotta think about yourcircle.
(04:44):
Right?
And who are your people?
But who are you within thiscircle?
So I was having thisconversation with a friend of
mine about one of the people inher circle.
And I'm saying in her circlebecause she was claiming it to
be in her circle.
Um, claiming this girl to be inher circle, but they had a
difference of opinions.
(05:05):
And lately these days, everybodygot a damn difference of
opinion.
They swaying different ways.
Who knows?
Some people are surprised you assome of the choices that they
choose, but I digress.
But in this conversation, shewas like, but tree, she's in my
circle.
And my friend completely wasdisagreeing with this person in
(05:27):
her circle.
Like they did not have the sameopinions and I had to say to
her, I was like, well, why isshe in your circle?
And my friend had to take awhole pause.
Cause when I say she was firedthe hell up with this
conversation and back and forthand not being on the same page.
My friend was like, wait aminute, hold up.
Now, while she is family friend,you guys definitely have a
(05:51):
difference of opinion and sheshould no longer be your circle.
She might be the circumference.
She on the perimeter.
She went outside and sometimeswe got to consider that.
Who do you let in?
And I saw a lot of people outhere.
That's why I keep my circlesmall, but we had this
conversation before and another.
Podcasts like, no, you betterchoose wisely because it's not
(06:14):
necessarily keeping it small,but it's keeping the right
people.
But who are they?
And honestly, you need a littlebalance in your life.
Sometimes you might need alittle bit resistant to bring
your butt out the clouds to belike, I don't know about that,
but understand who the hell isin your circle, but these days,
(06:35):
what are we afraid of?
I don't care how long I've knownyou, if you are not elevated to
the space of where I am, youmust go.
You become this circumference.
You can't be the inner circle.
You can't.
And it's no hard feelings.
You just on the outside.
You're not quite on the insidebecause I see you for who you
(06:55):
are.
But I had this conversation witha client as well, because she
had a friend who was meangirling, right?
And I'm talking about straightmean girl and, and in denial
acting like, Oh, I am do that.
I don't know what you talkingabout.
Cause they play with you andthey creating a whole problem.
And then want to talk about aproblem.
They have, they supposedlydidn't have, but gave straight
(07:20):
mean girl.
And this girl was, this womanwas a friend of hers for, um,
Years.
And we're not talking aboutfive, three, probably damn near
20.
But that circle changes andsometimes we got to reevaluate
that shit.
Cause I'm going to tell you,keeping certain people in your
circle will bring you the helldown.
But I do believe at first, youneed to take accountability for
(07:43):
who you are in that circle andwhat you need at that moment.
Who's in your circle and who areyou?
Now I can tell you, I might be aMost of the time I'm probably
the visionary in the groupbecause I want to see the
positive and shit I'm trying togrow.
I'm always trying to take overthe world I'm like pinkie in the
(08:05):
brain after this motherfuckerbecause every day I'm thinking
about something new a new way toget it I'm gonna be positive
about it.
I'm gonna keep going girl.
You got this what you better notlet them people play with you I
got your back round to the sideBut I am also that friend that I
ain't hard though.
We go out You What do you wantto eat?
I can eat anywhere.
(08:26):
And if I don't want to eat, I'mcool with a little sip.
I ain't gonna die.
But there are some people thatif we don't do that, then, you
know, life is over.
And I'm like, girl, it ain'tthat serious.
Sir, get it together.
But it's not always as seriousas we make it.
But in our season of like, youwant to grow, you're emotionally
(08:48):
elevating, you are elevating inbusiness, Work, check your
circle and you might need tohave several circles of friends,
but there are definitely somepeople that need to be in the
circumference.
They in the area, but they ain'teven coming all the way in.
They don't get a slice of thepie and we got to realize that
(09:10):
and I know that's just all I'mgoing to tell you.
I know it's all.
And I, I honestly believe I gotsome good people with me.
They keep me grounded sometimesand they remind me of, Hey girl,
you know, that's you.
And they accountable.
And I love that for me.
I love that I've had friendshipsfor years.
(09:32):
And I understand them, theyunderstand me, and we great.
They allow me to be pinky in thebrain often and I harass the
shit out of them.
Anybody who was listening, Ilove all y'all.
I harass you with all thispositivity.
Sometimes I can be overwhelmingwith this positivity cause I
wake up off the shits and I willring their phone.
Girl, guess what I thought aboutyou?
For your business.
(09:53):
Or you should do this.
You said this yesterday and youknow what?
I think that you could do betterand we can work it out.
I'm that friend.
But I do have those resistors.
I have those fence sitters andyou have to learn how to deal
with them in your circle, inyour class, in your life of
learning.
How do you move about?
(10:14):
How do you treat peoplerecognizing where they are?
Do they deserve to be there?
How much attention do you givethem?
How do you give them attention?
Do you allow them to have theirvoice when they seem to have
none?
And it's being aware of thepeople around you, but who you
are to the people that's in yourcircle is just as fucking
(10:35):
important.
I keep my circle small.
Cause you can't trust people.
But you know, a question alwaysasks, do you trust your damn
self?
Where is your mindset?
And I ain't going to sit hereand say, I trust everybody.
Cause I will definitely give youa rope to hang your ass.
Scorpio energy.
Hang yourself.
You said it.
I didn't.
(10:56):
But what I am is if I'm yourfriend, I'm your goddamn friend.
I'm in there.
I'm that friend to take the tagsoff hit somebody with the
bumper.
What we got to do.
But in this season of justemotionally evolving, evolving
in business, it's like thecircles are shifting.
The circles are changing howmuch time, energy and space you
(11:18):
give to someone is important foryour growth and how you are.
So today I hope and pray thatyou got the right circle.
And I hope that you know who youare in that circle.
I know my Vagas, they get onyour damn nerves.
Y'all better leave them to thecircumference because they can't
(11:38):
get a piece of the pie.
And as always, with myrandomness, I appreciate you and
until next time.
Welcome back y'all to that most randomest podcast
ever.
I am back y'all.
Let me tell you something.
I don't know if y'all noticedbut this shit's therapeutic for
me.
I love some of y'all.
I hope y'all appreciate itbecause some of the things I
share with y'all, I share in thesalon.
I'm sharing it with friends.
So I be feeling like I'm gonnashare it with the world.
So if you know somebody who beneeding some of these words, you
(01:03):
might be in this situationsharing.
Share it with your friend.
Let's talk about it.
Let's chat about it.
But I'm going to tell yousomething in this season, I
learned about your goddamn self.
You've learned about others aswell.
Am I new?
It's not new.
I shouldn't even make that shitup.
It ain't new.
Right.
But when it comes to me and whoI choose to have in my space
(01:28):
right now, you gotta look atyour dynamic, right?
And that dynamic of yourfriendship.
And that dynamic is foreverevolving, but sometimes we want
to keep it the same out ofcomfort, right?
And so like everything, when itcomes to connections, people,
yes, it is still businessrelated to me.
(01:49):
And that's how I process itbecause you learn things on
either side of the water.
Even in relationships, you canapply something to business.
But in this situation, when I,was going around into different
salons and I'm teaching classes.
One of the things that we ineducation to learn how to
educate is being aware of youraudience, being aware of who is
(02:11):
going to be in this class or thetypes of people in this class,
right?
So they labeled them as threedifferent things.
And this also applies to yourdamn friendships and people in
your life, right?
So be aware of this.
You got three different types.
You got those visionaries, yougot a fence setter, and you got
a resistor.
(02:32):
Now, first of all, you probablyneed to indicate who the hell
you are and these connections.
What type of person are you?
Are you a visionary who sees allthe possibilities, right?
More positive spirit, go getter.
Um, willing to learn somethingnew, take accountability for the
actions, right?
(02:54):
Then you have your fence sitterand the fence sitter, like in a
classroom, they'll be the personthat goes either way.
They're not positive.
They'll go with whoever'sswaying them at the moment,
right?
And not too much of a voicestays quiet, chill.
And then you have your resistor.
(03:15):
And in the classroom, theresistor is almost like that
squeaky wheel that needsattention.
But they tend to resist things.
They think that they know itall.
They know it all before you evengot there.
They want to be combativesometimes in the classroom, or
they, they have to be like,everything is a battle and the
(03:38):
attention needs to be on them.
And a lot of times that persontends to have a very strong
personality that can take yourclass far left.
Okay.
usually they also in yourworkplace that'll bring down the
environment.
Always negative.
Always got something going on.
Mouth is always open andprobably hardly ever.
Right.
but the interesting thing is, isthat that happens in your
(04:00):
friendship circles as well.
You have those friends that aredoing a thing and they're super
positive.
They're making things happen.
You had that friend and justlike, Hey, I'm gonna go with
whatever the crowd does.
No real opinions.
Um, yeah.
Tends to be pretty quiet, chill,good with whatever.
(04:22):
And then you had that one friendthat's always in the shit.
That can turn your night left.
Um, piss poor energy andsometimes just don't try to
cover it up like they're not theone.
They like a mean girl.
They tend to be like the meangirl.
And they want to get people ontheir team.
To make it seem like everythingis bad.
But you gotta think about yourcircle.
(04:44):
Right?
And who are your people?
But who are you within thiscircle?
So I was having thisconversation with a friend of
mine about one of the people inher circle.
And I'm saying in her circlebecause she was claiming it to
be in her circle.
Um, claiming this girl to be inher circle, but they had a
difference of opinions.
(05:05):
And lately these days, everybodygot a damn difference of
opinion.
They swaying different ways.
Who knows?
Some people are surprised you assome of the choices that they
choose, but I digress.
But in this conversation, shewas like, but tree, she's in my
circle.
And my friend completely wasdisagreeing with this person in
(05:27):
her circle.
Like they did not have the sameopinions and I had to say to
her, I was like, well, why isshe in your circle?
And my friend had to take awhole pause.
Cause when I say she was firedthe hell up with this
conversation and back and forthand not being on the same page.
My friend was like, wait aminute, hold up.
Now, while she is family friend,you guys definitely have a
(05:51):
difference of opinion and sheshould no longer be your circle.
She might be the circumference.
She on the perimeter.
She went outside and sometimeswe got to consider that.
Who do you let in?
And I saw a lot of people outhere.
That's why I keep my circlesmall, but we had this
conversation before and another.
Podcasts like, no, you betterchoose wisely because it's not
(06:14):
necessarily keeping it small,but it's keeping the right
people.
But who are they?
And honestly, you need a littlebalance in your life.
Sometimes you might need alittle bit resistant to bring
your butt out the clouds to belike, I don't know about that,
but understand who the hell isin your circle, but these days,
(06:35):
what are we afraid of?
I don't care how long I've knownyou, if you are not elevated to
the space of where I am, youmust go.
You become this circumference.
You can't be the inner circle.
You can't.
And it's no hard feelings.
You just on the outside.
You're not quite on the insidebecause I see you for who you
(06:55):
are.
But I had this conversation witha client as well, because she
had a friend who was meangirling, right?
And I'm talking about straightmean girl and, and in denial
acting like, Oh, I am do that.
I don't know what you talkingabout.
Cause they play with you andthey creating a whole problem.
And then want to talk about aproblem.
They have, they supposedlydidn't have, but gave straight
(07:20):
mean girl.
And this girl was, this womanwas a friend of hers for, um,
Years.
And we're not talking aboutfive, three, probably damn near
20.
But that circle changes andsometimes we got to reevaluate
that shit.
Cause I'm going to tell you,keeping certain people in your
circle will bring you the helldown.
But I do believe at first, youneed to take accountability for
(07:43):
who you are in that circle andwhat you need at that moment.
Who's in your circle and who areyou?
Now I can tell you, I might be aMost of the time I'm probably
the visionary in the groupbecause I want to see the
positive and shit I'm trying togrow.
I'm always trying to take overthe world I'm like pinkie in the
(08:05):
brain after this motherfuckerbecause every day I'm thinking
about something new a new way toget it I'm gonna be positive
about it.
I'm gonna keep going girl.
You got this what you better notlet them people play with you I
got your back round to the sideBut I am also that friend that I
ain't hard though.
We go out You What do you wantto eat?
I can eat anywhere.
(08:26):
And if I don't want to eat, I'mcool with a little sip.
I ain't gonna die.
But there are some people thatif we don't do that, then, you
know, life is over.
And I'm like, girl, it ain'tthat serious.
Sir, get it together.
But it's not always as seriousas we make it.
But in our season of like, youwant to grow, you're emotionally
(08:48):
elevating, you are elevating inbusiness, Work, check your
circle and you might need tohave several circles of friends,
but there are definitely somepeople that need to be in the
circumference.
They in the area, but they ain'teven coming all the way in.
They don't get a slice of thepie and we got to realize that
(09:10):
and I know that's just all I'mgoing to tell you.
I know it's all.
And I, I honestly believe I gotsome good people with me.
They keep me grounded sometimesand they remind me of, Hey girl,
you know, that's you.
And they accountable.
And I love that for me.
I love that I've had friendshipsfor years.
(09:32):
And I understand them, theyunderstand me, and we great.
They allow me to be pinky in thebrain often and I harass the
shit out of them.
Anybody who was listening, Ilove all y'all.
I harass you with all thispositivity.
Sometimes I can be overwhelmingwith this positivity cause I
wake up off the shits and I willring their phone.
Girl, guess what I thought aboutyou?
For your business.
(09:53):
Or you should do this.
You said this yesterday and youknow what?
I think that you could do betterand we can work it out.
I'm that friend.
But I do have those resistors.
I have those fence sitters andyou have to learn how to deal
with them in your circle, inyour class, in your life of
learning.
How do you move about?
(10:14):
How do you treat peoplerecognizing where they are?
Do they deserve to be there?
How much attention do you givethem?
How do you give them attention?
Do you allow them to have theirvoice when they seem to have
none?
And it's being aware of thepeople around you, but who you
are to the people that's in yourcircle is just as fucking
(10:35):
important.
I keep my circle small.
Cause you can't trust people.
But you know, a question alwaysasks, do you trust your damn
self?
Where is your mindset?
And I ain't going to sit hereand say, I trust everybody.
Cause I will definitely give youa rope to hang your ass.
Scorpio energy.
Hang yourself.
You said it.
I didn't.
(10:56):
But what I am is if I'm yourfriend, I'm your goddamn friend.
I'm in there.
I'm that friend to take the tagsoff hit somebody with the
bumper.
What we got to do.
But in this season of justemotionally evolving, evolving
in business, it's like thecircles are shifting.
The circles are changing howmuch time, energy and space you
(11:18):
give to someone is important foryour growth and how you are.
So today I hope and pray thatyou got the right circle.
And I hope that you know who youare in that circle.
I know my Vagas, they get onyour damn nerves.
Y'all better leave them to thecircumference because they can't
(11:38):
get a piece of the pie.
And as always, with myrandomness, I appreciate you and
until next time.
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