Supplemental Study Guide: https://www.drdallasbragg.com/newsletters/blog/posts/silence
Dr. Dallas Bragg interviews Alexander Cheves about his personal experience with chemsex and the crisis of silence surrounding substance use in the men who have sex with men (MSM) community. Alexander explains that U.S. LGBTQ+ media often avoids covering chemsex due to fears of pathologizing the community, even though gay male communities have documented higher rates of substance abuse. Both compare this silence to the early AIDS crisis, where deaths were kept quiet due to stigma. Alexander shares how he was introduced to chemsex through parties and hookups but managed to maintain boundaries and walk away when needed, attributing this ability simply to "luck" rather than any special quality.
The discussion explores Alexander's background trauma and its connection to substance use. Raised by evangelical Southern Baptist parents who adopted him, he faced significant challenges around his gay identity and lived with anxiety, OCD, and highly structured routines. He found that drugs provided permission to escape rigid self-regulation. Both men share transformative experiences with psychedelics, particularly psilocybin, which helped Alexander develop crucial self-acceptance. He now follows a harm reduction approach, avoiding meth while occasionally using substances he feels help rather than harm him. He emphasizes that learning to appreciate sex without chemical enhancement requires patience and acceptance that some experiences may be disappointing.
Alexander notes significant cultural differences between U.S. and European approaches to substance use, explaining that Berlin's less stigmatized drug culture allows for more practical harm reduction strategies without rigid 12-step programs. Both men emphasize the urgent need for influential community members to break the silence around chemsex, noting that shame-based recovery approaches often drive people away from help. The episode advocates for individualized recovery approaches, harm reduction as a valid alternative to complete sobriety, and creating judgment-free spaces where people can discuss substance use honestly while receiving appropriate support.
Alexander Cheves is an accomplished writer with a decade of experience covering sexuality, masculinity, HIV, and queer identity. His work has appeared in Out Magazine, The Advocate, Vice, and other major publications. He writes the "Last Call" column for Out Magazine and an advice column called "Go Ask Alex." His memoir "My Love is a Beast" won the 2022 Geoff Mains Nonfictino Prize. Originally from the American South, he now lives and works in Berlin.
The AfterMeth:
Join our Facebook Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theaftermeth/
Dr. Dallas Bragg
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drdallasbragg
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drdallasbragg/
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drdallasbragg
YouTube: The Aftermeth Podcast
X: https://twitter.com/Drdallasbragg
Free online course to End the Relapse Cycle: https://www.drdallasbragg.com/offers/e7c2Eo22/checkout
Meth-Free Blueprint EBOOK: https://www.drdallasbragg.com/offers/o8qFhK5i/checkout
Popular Podcasts
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
Ruthie's Table 4
For more than 30 years The River Cafe in London, has been the home-from-home of artists, architects, designers, actors, collectors, writers, activists, and politicians. Michael Caine, Glenn Close, JJ Abrams, Steve McQueen, Victoria and David Beckham, and Lily Allen, are just some of the people who love to call The River Cafe home. On River Cafe Table 4, Rogers sits down with her customers—who have become friends—to talk about food memories. Table 4 explores how food impacts every aspect of our lives. “Foods is politics, food is cultural, food is how you express love, food is about your heritage, it defines who you and who you want to be,” says Rogers. Each week, Rogers invites her guest to reminisce about family suppers and first dates, what they cook, how they eat when performing, the restaurants they choose, and what food they seek when they need comfort. And to punctuate each episode of Table 4, guests such as Ralph Fiennes, Emily Blunt, and Alfonso Cuarón, read their favourite recipe from one of the best-selling River Cafe cookbooks. Table 4 itself, is situated near The River Cafe’s open kitchen, close to the bright pink wood-fired oven and next to the glossy yellow pass, where Ruthie oversees the restaurant. You are invited to take a seat at this intimate table and join the conversation. For more information, recipes, and ingredients, go to https://shoptherivercafe.co.uk/ Web: https://rivercafe.co.uk/ Instagram: www.instagram.com/therivercafelondon/ Facebook: https://en-gb.facebook.com/therivercafelondon/ For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iheartradio app, apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com
The Joe Rogan Experience
The official podcast of comedian Joe Rogan.