E362 | MOST SHARED E299: How to Quit Being a People Pleaser

This week, we’re revisiting one of our most popular episodes, and a topic people continue to ask us about. 

People pleasing. We’ve all seen it before (whether we recognized it or not) - constantly being agreeable, always saying yes, never setting any boundaries - all to the point of self-destruction.  If you haven’t experienced it yourself, it’s likely you’ve witnessed someone else demonstrate these behaviors. 

And although it may have short-term benefits, we know that these self-destructive tendencies are not sustainable, and can lead to mental, physical, and emotional exhaustion and burnout.

If this is something you think you might struggle with, or if you know someone who does, today’s episode provides a wide variety of perspectives on what “people pleasing” can look like in the day to day world, a number of root causes, and a handful of different solutions you can use to help you manage these behaviors.

More specifically, Brett dives into: 

• Quotes that hit - some of the most impactful sound bites I’ve heard on the topic
• What drives you?  How our drives can lead us into unhealthy people pleasing behaviors
• The downside to many of the mainstream self-help resources that address the topic
• The necessary self-reflection that has to take place before we can make long-lasting behavioral changes

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Referenced Resources:

E210: Assertiveness: How To Ask For What You Want & Get What You Need

E207: How Perception Impacts Communication & Relationships

E208: Robert Greene: Mastering Human Nature and Facing Your Flaws

E200: What To Do When Trying To Help Makes Stuff Worse

E176: When Positive Thinking Doesn’t Work

E22: The Value of Self-Doubt

E130: How Understanding Drives Helps Build Buy-In

Quiz: What Drives You?

Online Course: Valued - mentioned in today’s episode regarding opportunity cost, this life-time access course help you to identify your values and take control of your career

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