March 12, 2025 • 56 mins
Dom L'Amour speaks with Friend of the show of the show Ryan O'fallon AKA @Ofallonryan about going to college in Cape Girardeau, Life in the Air force and Growth.
Dive into an engaging exploration of relationships, personal growth, and life lessons woven seamlessly into the experiences shared through the years at Southeast Missouri State University and the vibrant culture of Cape Girardeau. In this episode, Dom and special guest Ryan O'Fallon reflect on their time in college, discussing how friendships were forged amid the backdrop of youthful exuberance and burgeoning adulthood. At the heart of their recollections are the complex dynamics of loyalty, misunderstanding, and growth, underscoring the lessons learned during vibrant yet challenging years spent in a quaint college town. They candidly traverse emotions tied to camaraderie, rivalry, and the meaningful connections that shaped them as individuals.
Ryan shares poignant stories from his military career, detailing how the discipline and values learned have profoundly influenced his perspectives today. Balancing light-hearted moments with profound discussions, the episode resonates with listeners who have navigated similar paths. Emphasizing self-responsibility, resilience, and understanding, it paints a comprehensive picture of growth that surpasses the limits of comfort zones. The conversation burgeons with relatable tales of nostalgia, showcasing how memories from Cape Girardeau linger warmly in their hearts while encouraging introspection about one's journey.
Through laughter and reflection, this episode not only celebrates the past but also champions how experiences can mold us into the individuals we aspire to be. Stay tuned for insights and encouragement, and please subscribe to join our community as we craft stories through the lens of life.
Opening quote: JFK
Opening and Closing Theme song: Produced by Dom L'Amour
Transition Music from Mad Chops Vol. 1 and Mad Chops Vol. 2 by Mad Keys
and from Piano Soul Vol.1 (Loop Pack) by The Modern Producers Team
Featured song: "HoneySuckle Rose" By Fats Waller
Cover art by Studio Mania: Custom Art @studiomania99
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
One of my troops is a homosexual.
Not only that, he's ahomosexual black man.
Dom Treat him no different thanany other troop, any other
person that I meet, because he'sa human being like me.
I took all of this that I gotfrom Cape Girardeau and it still
helps me in my 12 year militarycareer today.
The people that I met downthere may have not been my
favorite people, but they alltaught me lessons.
(00:21):
They all taught me somethingand I've taken it with me every
day.
Now, some of them, if I seethem on the you know, if I see
them outside, they may not get apositive wave from me, I might
cross to the other side of thestreet, but I'll still see them
and go in my head.
You taught me something, goodor bad or indifferent, you
taught me something and it stillsticks with me.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
Ladies and gentlemen and anyone else who is here, my
name is Dom LaMoure and you arelistening to the Black man
Talking Emotions podcast.
On today's episode, I speakwith close friend Ryan O'Fallon
about going to college in CapeGirardeau, life in the Air Force
and growth.
Ask not what your country cando for you.
(01:21):
Ask what you can do for yourcountry.
You're as St Louis as possibleright now.
You got a blue shirt on All day, every day City hat on PGA
Belle Reve Budweiser rightbehind your hat.
It's stupid how ridiculously StLouis you are right.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
Now, it's in the blood man.
Right, it's in the blood manit's in the blood.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Oh, my god, like you, wake up.
Like what else can I make stlouis?
Oh, I'm wearing city socks.
There it, there it is.
I was just about to say I betyou socks or drawers or st louis
, and that is hilarious, perfect.
Thank you, man.
Thank you for doing this.
I've had pretty much all mycore friends on this.
You were one of the last, Ibelieve.
(02:08):
I'm trying to think of who elseI haven't had on, but you were
the one of the ones that wantedto do first season, but I just
didn't have enough time to fityou in and make a compelling
episode with.
So, thank you.
I know we're going to talkmilitary stuff eventually, but I
wanted to go further than that.
I want to go back to college.
I wanted to go back to usmeeting in the time machine.
(02:32):
Yeah, yeah.
And the reason why is one thingthat happens on this podcast a
lot is we get to talking and alot of stories from simo arise
and people go through theirturmoil, people go through their
pleasures, people go throughanything that made them feel in
college.
And one person.
(02:53):
If you were to say, dominique,who's the one person you think
that is the most negative aboutCMO, I would put you at the top
of that list faster than any oneelse so wanted to talk.
And we're not going to justtalk negatively.
Of course we'll start off withsome of the like just trying to
understand more of why it was acertain way for you.
(03:13):
But then by the end I want to.
I want some positives from CapeJard, or why you enjoyed or at
least what you take from yourlessons in the city.
So kind of give people a eyeview of your frustrations with
Southeast Missouri StateUniversity.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
I enjoyed it starting out there.
You know we started in the fallof 2009.
We all came together.
You'd already been there for ayear, being a class ahead of me.
Two years, two years oh it wastwo years.
Good Lord, you, old man.
Two years, two years oh it wastwo years.
Good Lord, you, old man.
But you know, showing up andmeeting all these new people is
first time on your own and I'm avery loyal person, as you know.
(03:55):
So, bringing these new peopleinto my life, I wanted them to
be as close as they possiblycould to me.
So I have always had this viewof.
I have this very long reach offriendship.
I put it out there immediately.
I put myself out there and hereI am as I am.
Accept me, please.
Yeah, with all the you know thebroken problems I had, my anger
(04:15):
being the number one cause.
I guarantee the peoplelistening who did know me back
then, no, I was a very angry guy, yeah, and that comes from just
a long time of of bullying,from when I was a kid, bullied
viciously through grade schooland then came into high school
and came into my own.
But I wanted that friendship tostart, so it started out really
good there at the beginning,but then, as we kept going
through the years, I startednoticing people starting to
(04:38):
leave me behind or they wouldsay one thing to my face, but
then I was hearing everythingelse that was coming from behind
my back and I didn't know aboutit because a lot of people
didn't trust me for some reasonand I didn't feel I was doing
too many untrusting things.
I was this very selfish guy fora little while, was doing my
own thing.
I'd been hurt a lot.
Women in my past had drugged medown For a while.
(04:58):
There I was a womanizer, hencethe she-devil-ness came out of
me and I was very much.
I'm not looking for anyone.
I'm not looking to try to bewith one singular person.
I was trying to be with a lotof people just for fun.
In that course, I heard a lotof people in the progress of
doing that, not realizing it atthe time.
Obviously, 2011 is when I leftand then 2012 is when I joined.
(05:19):
So a lot of time to reflect, 10plus years of time to reflect
on some of the decisions I'vemade.
So I can understand where somepeople had a problem with me,
but in the end I felt that I wasa very loyal person, a very
loyal friend, and I wassurrounded by a lot of people
who weren't loyal to me and thathurt, because I put myself out
there.
So much for so many people justto find out that they had this
(05:40):
very negative view of me and,instead of confronting me
because they felt I'd be tooangry to talk to which I
wouldn't have been if you wouldhave sat me down and said, hey,
I have a problem, let's talkabout it.
I would have done that, but somany people were scared of my
reaction that, instead of comingto me, they went behind my back
and, man, you know, I turnedaround and I found so many
knives there that I was shockedby it.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
Yeah, especially because we're performance majors
, of course.
So in the theater departmentthere's always going to be some
type of gossip or stereotypesand, weirdly, I remember I'm not
even going to say who it was,but there was this girl that
maybe three years after collegewe had got drinks, hung out and
(06:23):
she was telling me about how.
You know, I always wanted toget to know you more and I was,
I was attracted to you orwhatever.
And I'm like, OK, because shehad boyfriend at this point so
she can talk freely.
And she's like I just I alwaysfelt like you were just a player
, you were this guy who alwayshad all these women and this and
that, and I was like, wait aminute, Did you ever like, like
(06:46):
really you felt that way.
She's like I don't know, I justfeel like I kind of noticed you
walking around and everyonewould talk this way about you
and I just kind of heard whatyou were and thought that's what
you were, but that's not reallyyou, and I'm like I don't
understand how we could havebeen somewhere for so long and
grew up together.
I feel like a lot of us grew upand became adults and actually
(07:10):
molded ourselves into who we arein this place with these people
, but then you can have a momentwhere someone is like I treated
you like a person from arm'slength.
I treated you like a personfrom arm's length.
I didn't want to have you thatclose because the rumors about
you told me one thing about youthat I didn't realize wasn't
(07:31):
true.
It just blows my mind how oftenthat happened.
Speaker 1 (07:34):
Yeah, it happened quite a lot and that's why I
gravitated and we've talkedabout this to the older classmen
, the more veteran men around me, because I could see that I
connected more with you, withMark, with Tommy, with Jeff
Holtmeyer, with Lopenote, withthe list goes on.
I felt more a part of thatclass than I did my own class,
(07:59):
which kind of hurt because, likeI've said, my class is my class
.
These are my people and thecore group that came in with me.
I felt the responsibility to beloyal to them because they were
my class and that was verypersonal to me at the time.
And then later on I found outthat some of those were the
biggest people going aroundsaying a lot of things about me
(08:20):
that I didn't know about, thatmy wife had to tell me about
years later and that kind ofrealization like wow, I really
had this one train of thoughtabout that time there.
And now it's been very skewed.
As you said, I'm the number onehater when it comes to Cape
Girardeau and Southeast and thetheater department, and it's
because I found out so muchstuff after we were gone that it
(08:44):
just really destroyed the twoand a half years of the time
that I had there.
For those of you who may or maynot be listening, I'm not
blaming you.
I have a lot of stuff that wasmy own fault and I take
responsibility for that.
I made terrible choices.
I left there because I had poorgrades, because I made bad
choices, because I wanted toparty and drink and live it up.
So don't think I'm sitting heresaying it's all your fault that
(09:10):
my college time was the worst,because at the end of the day,
even though I may have anegative view, I came out of
there with some of the greatestpeople that I still have the
pleasure of knowing, to includeyou, mark Richard, tommy Statler
, who I've lost touch with,sadly, but I still see every now
and then on Facebook and socialmedia.
So I, tommy, you're listening.
I wish you well, buddy, and Ihope we can connect soon to Jeff
(09:31):
Holtmeyer, who called me and Istill one of my favorite things
that Jeff did right before Ideployed to Saudi Arabia he
called me, wished me the bestand told me that if he needed,
if I needed anything legally toinvolve my family, a
distribution of assets, godforbid anything happened to me
that he was willing to do thosethings for me I hadn't talked to
Jeff in I don't know how manyyears before that phone call and
he still reached out, knowingwhere I was going.
(09:54):
It's amazing I met so many greatpeople who are still a part of
my life in one way or another,whether that's me and you, who
talk on a regular basis.
We just saw each other justabout two weeks ago.
Yep had on a regular basis.
We just saw each other justabout two weeks ago had lunch.
You know, mark and I haven'tseen each other in a while time.
But, mark, I've talked to Markfour times last year, five times
, which, in the line of workwe're all in, is amazing that we
(10:14):
got to connect that many times.
Because I'm on the East coast,he's on the West coast, you're
down in Georgia with me on theEast coast, but our lives are so
spread that we still find theseperfect little moments.
Whether it's midday or late atnight, we end up on the phone
for about an hour, hour and ahalf.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
Yeah, which is beautiful.
That is something that I reallydo count my blessings on.
How often I get to speak topeople that I've known for a
long time, I feel like it'ssomething that I truly pride
myself on.
Being a person who is able tokeep a relationship with someone
genuine for years and years,and that's so dope to be able to
(10:51):
have these moments and to beable to even reminisce about,
you know, a time where we allwere together.
And the one thing that I'mreally glad to hear and I was
going to ask, but I feel like Idon't even really have to now
because you do it already yousee your flaws in the things
that happened back then, thenegativity.
You still can sit back and belike you know what?
I still have some of the bestpeople around me.
(11:12):
I have my wife and my familybecause of that place, so, like
you still see the good that camefrom it, but also you see that
you could have handled thingsdifferently.
Oh, so much yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:21):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:21):
And I feel like that's something that I talk
about a lot to people where Ihear someone say I wish I can go
back and change this.
I wish I can go back, and it'slike if you change it, you
wouldn't learn from it.
So, being in a place now whereyou can actually look back and
be like man, I could have donethis better, but now I'm
becoming a better person myself,I'm pushing myself to do the
right things, that's the growthas an adult.
(11:59):
That's what it's all aboutSeeing what you could do better
and doing better period.
Yeah, I always think of Cape inpositive light because of the
relationships I built there.
But when I talk about but Ireally embraced the city of Cape
Girardeau and I go there on theway home most of the time.
When I drive to St Louis, Istop through Cape every time.
Speaker 1 (12:13):
I'm almost jealous of it because I wish that I had
that path, because, coming fromDC, I go up through Pennsylvania
, west Virginia, ohio,indianapolis and then Illinois.
So I come through from the top,you're coming from the bottom.
I would love to be able to godown and revisit.
Go to Burritoville, god do.
Speaker 2 (12:29):
I miss Burritoville.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
What was the Cajun restaurant down there on
Broussard's?
One of the best bread puddings,etouffee.
It tastes just like.
Burritoville, the alligator,etouffee and a bread pudding
after, if I ever end up on deathrow for whatever reason, that
might be top five last meals.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
Yep, I actually took Adrian to Lambert's.
We went there a couple ofmonths ago maybe in October I
think and it was everything Likedude next to us got hit by a
roll.
You got the full experience ofLambert.
She caught her one.
I had me a huge Arnold Palmerright next to me.
(13:11):
It was the.
It reminded me exactly how Iwas and I had oh my God, I had
the most country thing I've hadin a while.
I had the white beans andbologna that they made.
That's like the most countryever.
I was eating the white beansand the bologna with the big
(13:35):
roll and they have the applebutter and the fried okra.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
Macaroni and tomatoes .
Speaker 2 (13:42):
It was amazing man, and I feel like those are the
things that it's hard for me tohate completely on southeast
missouri, because it introducedme to so many things that I
still cherish, like, oh,lambert's.
Like I only can do lambert'slike once a year, but when I do
it it's it's always reminds meof the fun times we had in
(14:03):
college.
You remember we drove downthere once and just it was just,
let's go to Lambert's, fuck it.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
We did it on a whim.
We went there for one of ifwe're going to go, we want to
switch to a little bit ofpositive of Cape Girardeau.
That was one of my birthdays,one of my first birthdays down
there.
A bunch of us went down for mybirthday to Lambert's and that
remember when they used to servethe country fried steak in the
pan.
(14:27):
They make it in the pan andthen serve it to you in a pan
with green beans, mashedpotatoes and all the fixings and
then they gave you that to-gocup, that mug.
Speaker 2 (14:38):
The thing is I forgot about the mug.
When we walked in and sat atthe table and they put the mug
down, I was like, oh my god, Iforgot.
This is how you drink the drinkhere.
Speaker 1 (14:47):
You get to keep it ah , that's the best part you get.
They don't charge you extrathat well they.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
Now you can't keep it , and I almost bought one
because I was like damn, I usedto have one of these and I don't
know where mine is.
Mine is in la somewhere.
Some dudes got it at a pawnshop, more or less.
Speaker 1 (15:07):
Mine's somewhere in Jeff and Maggie's house.
I know that it's somewhere.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
I got to find one, Like I was going to buy one
because the newer ones are great, but they all.
It's exactly how it was.
What would be something youcould say helped you get you to
where you are now?
You have a family, you'reworking, you have a house over
your head, like you're not a bumon the streets.
How did Cape Girardeau propelyou to where you are now?
Speaker 1 (15:29):
Cape taught me that I had a lot of growing up to do.
For those of you who don't knowthe reason why I had to not had
to, but the reason why I chosethe military and we'll get to
that that career part of it, butI went home after being
academically suspended from CapeGirardeau.
I part of it, but I went homeafter being academically
suspended from Cape Girardeau.
I let my grades drop too far.
They were like hey, you know,we understand, but you need to
take a semester off and you cancome back in the fall.
(15:51):
I had a choice to make and atthe time y'all were leaving.
That was your graduating yearand I'm still upset with myself
that I got suspended, that Imissed out on a lot not being
down there.
I still came down almost everyother weekend to party and hang
out, but I missed out on so manythings being with you guys
graduating.
So my plan was to go with.
I knew you guys were going toLA, so I was like I'm going with
(16:13):
you, I don't need no dangdegree, I can just get into the
industry.
Yeah, and everyone's like that.
You know, blah, blah, blah,blah, blah Talking in my ear.
You know if you don't have adegree.
And I said you know what?
I don't care, I'm willing towork for it.
And I had found a stuntmanschool in California that I
wanted to go to and I could getmy license as a stuntman.
(16:33):
And I was like, well, I don'tgot to be an actor, I'll be the
guy that gets thrown through aglass window.
Heck, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll doall this crazy stuff.
So I was going to go home, workwith my, my mom, get another
job and just save my money andlive with mom and dad and save
up 10 grand to go to the school.
Yeah, however, I have a verystrict, very hard nose, but
(16:54):
loving father and my father didnot like that plan in the
slightest.
Yeah.
And he came to me one day andhe said either you go back to
school in the fall or you'repaying rent.
And at the time, as a21-year-old kid at the time and
I say kid for those of youlistening if you're around you
are still a kid at the age of 21.
(17:14):
You can go buy alcohol, you arestill a kid.
He said either go back or payrent.
And I said F you, dad, I ain'tdoing that.
That showed me that I needed togrow, so going forward, the
positives that came out werejust simply I saw that there was
an error in my decision-making,that I wasn't using
self-responsibility, which isthe biggest thing.
(17:35):
If I can teach anyone anythingin this world,
self-responsibility is the bestthing that you can have, having
the mentality to sit there andgo.
This was my fault.
Even though some things mayhave been out of my control.
I still have a part to play andI need to take the
responsibility for that.
So I said, okay, it's time togrow, it's time to move on.
The positives coming out againwe're having friends like you
(17:57):
and Mark by my side.
You were groomsmen in mywedding, which is still one of
the greatest things.
You all still owe me money.
Fyi, you all never paid up onthe bet.
I didn't shed a single tear.
You did cry.
What are you talking about?
I didn't cry.
You didn't cry that day.
No, not during the ceremony.
Speaker 2 (18:14):
You all said I would cry it wasn't during the
ceremony.
Speaker 3 (18:16):
The bet was I would cry.
Speaker 1 (18:18):
You said I would cry during the ceremony and I did
not.
I ceremony and I did not.
I didn't show the whole day.
No, it was not, sir.
I remember.
I'm not wrong, you are wrongsorry, you remember that uh,
I'll tell you a great positiveand I'm sure we might talk about
this a little bit the LGBTQcommunity.
(18:39):
I met some amazing people.
It was my first exposure topeople in those categories
people like Jess Love if she'sever listened to this, one of
the best people I've.
I met some amazing people.
It was my first exposure topeople in those categories
People like Jess Love if she'sever listened to this, one of
the best people I've known.
We've lost touch over the years,but having people like them in
my life and learning about whyand how this all happened was
huge for a Irish Catholic kidfrom South City.
(19:02):
I didn't have that exposure.
I always knew about it.
My uncle, chris God rest hissoul just passed away.
He was gay but I didn't.
I didn't understand it growingup and then you know, obviously,
growing through the time thatwe grew up, you know it was
always a bullying thing callingyou gay or you know any one of
the slurs which I won't use, butI didn't get it.
So when those kind of cognitivescame out and then I met people
(19:24):
who were of that persuasion, Icame to realize oh, they're
normal people, they're just likeme, they just like their same
sex or other, whatever.
They're no different than me.
They bleed like me, they lovelike me, they drink like me,
some drink better than me andthey were beautiful people.
So my view towards the peopleof those selections are is
massive.
My view towards the people ofthose selections are is massive,
(19:46):
and I'll I'll swerve into mymilitary career just a little
bit.
Logan Ireland is a mastersergeant.
He's currently serving in ourair force and is a transgendered
woman to man, and he'scurrently a man, formerly Sarah
Ireland.
I met him when he wastransitioning and he's one of
the greatest people I've met inmy career still serving today.
You want to talk about being ina foxhole with somebody.
You want someone on your backwhen you're in the head in the
(20:08):
shit pardon my French that man.
I want him in the foxhole nextto me because I know I'm going
home alive, because he's afighter.
If I didn't meet people likethat in Cape Girardeau and then
came into the military, I mighthave a different view, and I
don't.
One of my troops is ahomosexual.
Not only that, he's ahomosexual black man, dom.
Treat him no different than anyother troop, any other person
(20:29):
that I meet, because he's ahuman being like me.
I took all of this that I gotfrom Cape Girardeau and it still
helps me in my 12 year militarycareer today.
The people that I met downthere may have not been my
favorite people, but they alltaught me lessons.
They all taught me somethingand I've taken it with me every
day.
Now some of them, if I see themon the you know, if I see them
outside, they may not get apositive wave from me.
(20:50):
I might cross to the other sideof the street, but I'll still
see them and go in my head.
You taught me something, goodor bad or indifferent.
You taught me something and itstill sticks with me.
Speaker 2 (21:01):
That's important and that's dope me something and it
still sticks with me.
That's important and that'sdope and that's a different view
of Cape Girardeau than youwould hear from most folks.
Most folks talk about SoutheastMissouri and how conservative
it is down there and, like gaypeople have a huge community in
this space still, and they werevery much in all areas of the
(21:24):
city.
When I was downtown working atBuckner's, it wasn't unnatural
to see drag queens come and doshows at Buckner's.
They used to have a whole dragshow at Cape Port Cape Like.
It was not odd, it was, it wasa part of the culture.
That was really, really dope.
And that's such a dope lessonto take from Cape Cheesy dope
(21:46):
lesson to take from Cape Cheesyand to continue to hopefully
give people a differentunderstanding of what it's like
in Southeast Missouri.
It's not as bad as people makeit out in.
Missouri has its problems, butI loved my time in Cape and the
people that I met and it wasjust incredible.
And the people that I met andit was just incredible.
I've known Ryan since before Imet him.
(22:08):
Actually, he was an item with afriend of mine from high school
and I was told to look out forhim when he made it down to
Southeast Missouri StateUniversity.
Ryan and I have been through alot together and I initiated him
into my family and our theatergroup frat but not really a frat
, it's the university playerswith nerds.
(22:30):
My family was the she Devils andyou hear that that comes up
earlier in the pod and later onin the pod.
He and I lived with each otherat one point during my senior
year and we have kept in touchwhile he has been moving around
the country as a security forcesofficer.
So I'm so proud of him and hisfamily and I send nothing but
(22:51):
love their way and I very muchappreciate him taking some time
and coming on the pod andsharing his story and I hope
people can kind of get a goodvisual of what kind of person he
is and the type of person thatI see in him.
I think he's just an incredibleperson.
Move into your life now becauseyou left that, had to make a
(23:24):
huge decision because of anultimatum and ended up where you
are now and I know being in themilitary has its ups and downs
and different things but kind ofgive people a picture of why
you chose the military and howit's formed you into who you are
now.
Speaker 1 (23:42):
So, before I start in my military career, my name is
Staff Sergeant Ryan O'Fallon.
I am currently a member of the316th Security Forces Squadron.
Any opinions or views that Imay speak about in this podcast
do not reflect the United StatesAir Force or the United States
government or any officers thatserve above me, to include the
president of the United Statessecretary of defense or the
(24:02):
joint chiefs of staff.
With that being said, it'salways fun, you know, because
real is real.
I'm a member of the UnitedStates Air Force, I'm a member
of the military and I losecertain freedoms.
I'm a protector of freedoms,but I lose certain freedoms in
serving this country.
So I have to be very careful inletting people know that my
(24:26):
views may align with yours ornot, and I'm still going to put
that uniform on every day andserve the people of this country
.
But getting started in how thiscame about.
So, as I said before, dad givesme that ultimatum, says, hey,
pay rent or go back to school.
Well, I didn't want to go backto school because I just had no
(24:47):
desire to be there anymore.
I loved being down there witheveryone, but the biggest thing
I was fighting was I was goingto school for a BFA in acting
and directing.
For those of you who don't knowBachelor in Fine Arts, acting,
directing.
I wanted to be an actordirector.
No, bachelor in fine arts,acting, directing.
I wanted to be an actor, anactor director, and I loved the
theater classes.
I loved stage combat.
That was my niche.
If anyone knew me, you knewstage combat was my thing.
(25:12):
But I couldn't stand going to mymy regular classes.
I hated math.
I was terrible.
That's ultimately why I leftwas math.
I failed the same math classthree times and that's not
because I didn't go, that'sbecause I was bad at it.
I just couldn't do it.
It was terrible at science.
The only classes I passed whenI was down there that weren't
theater related were Englishliterature and history.
Those are the only classes Icould pass.
I couldn't pass anything else.
Going forward I was like, well,I can't go back to school and I
(25:34):
want to go to LA, but I don'thave enough money and I can't
stay here in my dad's housebecause eventually it was going
to come to blows between my dadand I.
So one night, sitting with mymother and we were watching a
popular TV show back in thattime called Justified.
Justified is about a US marshalin Harlan County, kentucky.
One of my favorite shows, stillone of my go-tos, if I got
(25:54):
something I need to stream.
And mom was like well, what areyou going to do?
And I said I don't know, mom, Ijust I got to figure something
out and she goes.
Well, what about that?
And she pointed at the TV toTimothy Oliphant on the screen
and I'm like mom, I can't goback to school.
I thinking she was talking aboutacting.
She's like no, what about you,love?
You know him in the US Marshals, you could do that.
(26:15):
She's like well, what about themilitary?
And he said you told me Icouldn't join the military.
That was my original plan.
My original plan was 18 yearsold, graduate high school and go
sign up for the Marine Corps.
She was like well, I kind ofchanged my mind because you need
something.
I said, okay, I'll go talk to aMarine recruiter.
So dad came the next morning andobviously I didn't want to do
(26:37):
this without telling my fatherbecause I knew there'd be just
you know, boy, and you talked tome about it and I didn't want
to deal with that.
Dad, if you listen to this, youknow I love you.
So the next day I tell myfather.
I said, dad, I'm not paying yourent and I'm not going back to
school, I'm going to go join theMarines.
And he goes you're not joiningthe Marines, I'm trying to get
(27:02):
there and you can't stop me.
He goes no, you're going tojoin the Air Force.
And I said, dad, I don't want tojoin the chair force.
Even I made fun of it.
Everybody, yeah, he goes.
No, come down to my building.
At the time my dad worked forfederal protective services
downtown near Scott trade.
In the federal building he saidcome down and talk to Captain
Stone, who was my boss.
He was in the Air Force for 20years and he was a recruiter on
point.
Come talk to him.
So I went down, talked toCaptain Stone.
(27:22):
He sold me on the Air Force.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
What was the big like okay.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
Air Force, the ease in which the Air Force can
provide access to schooling andthe access to allowing you the
opportunity to do it whileyou're working.
He really sold me on how thejob is.
Whatever job you got, the AirForce is very flexible in its
operations.
So I was like okay, let me gohook up with a recruiter,
(27:47):
because obviously Captain Stone,who worked with my dad,
couldn't do that for me.
So he hooked me up with one ofhis buddies, tech Sergeant Lewis
Tart.
Sergeant Tart, if you magicallyhear this, you didn't warn me
and I'm coming for you if I everfind you.
So I went and hooked up withTech Sergeant Tartt and he gave
he was like all right, man, tellme about yourself, what you
want to do.
(28:07):
And I was like well, you know,everyone makes jokes about the
chair force and you know theydon't do anything.
And blah, blah, blah.
I said I don't want to.
I was like who are the guysthat do stuff like you know the
badasses?
And he was like well, there's,you know PJ, which is one of our
pararescuemen badass guys.
He told me all the tacticalguys, seer and CCT and all these
(28:28):
cool guys.
I was like all right, I meanthat sounds cool, I said, but
that you know, I don't know ifthat's me.
I was like, what about police?
I was like you guys havemilitary police.
He's like, oh yeah, it's calledsecurity forces.
And I was like, cool, I want todo that because I want to carry
a gun every day.
And everyone might hear thatand think, oh, this guy.
And I said no.
I said the reason why I want tocarry a gun every day is I want
to be able to do something ifthe situation arises.
(28:49):
If something goes down, I wantto be able to defend myself and
those around me with appropriateforce.
So he tells me yeah, got you.
Now, unbeknownst to me at thetime, security forces is one of
the easiest things to get into.
We are one of the top mannedpersonnel in the United States
Air Force.
We have, I think, the biggestcareer field numbers wise.
So he sold me into that.
(29:10):
I signed up and I left for SanAntonio, texas, on October 8th
2012, down to Joint BaseLackland where I did eight weeks
of basic military training.
Joint Base Lackland, where Idid eight weeks of basic
military training, and then Ileft my BMT squadron and drove
600 yards across the base to the343rd Training Squadron for
Security Forces.
I didn't go anywhere, yeah,yeah, to then continue my tech
(29:33):
school training, because a lotof people don't know is if, when
you join the military, you doyour basic training, which
teaches you how to be a basicperson in the military, and then
you go to your technicaltraining, which is your actual
job.
Now it's a little differentwith Air Force, army, navy
Marines.
It's all different.
So then I went to 343rd andtrained from December through
March of 2012 to become asecurity forces member, and then
(29:57):
got my orders to my first everbase, which was Whiteman Air
Force Base in Kansas City,missouri, and when I first got
them, I said, wait, missouri.
I said there's no Air ForceBase in Missouri.
And they went yeah, there is.
I said no, the closest one's inIllinois and it's Scott.
And they said, no, there's onenext to Kansas City.
To that point, 21 years on thisearth had zero idea that
(30:17):
Whiteman Air Force Base is inWarrensburg, missouri, so went
over there in May of 2012 andstarted my career as a security
forces member protecting the B-2bomber and nuclear weapons.
Where are you now?
So now I'm stationed here inbeautiful Washington DC, joint
Base Andrews.
Speaker 2 (30:37):
I'm so proud of you, dude.
That's such a cool position tobe able to say that you're in a
place that's so historic asWashington DC and doing
important work too.
And I understand from the jump,because even in college you
were always very much you wantedto be active, you wanted to do
things with the hands.
You wanted to do stage combatbecause you actually were
(30:58):
essential to helping createsomething.
You were a part of it, you weremaking things happen.
So it only makes sense that youwould go in and do something
that has a purpose like that inthe military.
Speaker 1 (31:09):
I was going to say.
Some people might argue it'sbecause I'm violent and angry.
Speaker 2 (31:12):
Well, I mean you say that, but I mean I feel like
you're a lot more relaxed nowthan you used to be, and that's
because of the military, morelikely, especially now.
You're a lot more grounded andI bet you, your patience is way
more in a place now that if youwere to go through the stuff in
Cape it would upset you in someways.
Yes, but also you have thetraining to keep your cool.
(31:35):
You know what I'm saying.
That's just.
That's just what I'm.
I'm, I'm assuming assumingBecause I know how different you
are now compared to back then.
I was there, I seen it, I was apart of the moment.
Speaker 1 (31:48):
So to be where you are now is great 100% and that's
going back to what we wereleading to earlier was the
discipline is what I needed.
That was what I was leading towhen we were talking about me
leaving Cape Girardeau thepersonal responsibility and
discipline being the biggestthing, and that's what the
military gave me was discipline.
And then to continue talkingabout cool is becoming security
forces, a military policeman.
(32:08):
I've learned that in the past,so I've been for seven years
doing security work, so I didn'treally do anything law
enforcement wise until I gothere in 2019, just before the
pandemic as a law enforcementofficer.
So that's what I primarily worknow and that discipline and
that level-headedness is neededon a day-to-day basis doing my
job, because you never know whatyou're going to walk into.
(32:30):
Because, as much as I don't doas much as my civilian
counterparts whether that be inSt Louis, new York, my own Metro
PD here in DC I don't encounterhalf or even 75% of what they
do, but we still get prettyserious situations here on the
base between the personnel thatwork and live here to the
civilian populace who may comeonto the base and start problems
(32:53):
.
I've discovered that I wanttwofold to be the first guy in
to protect and serve and defendanyone around me, but I also
want to be the first to save thepeople that I and defend anyone
around me, but I also want tobe the first to save the people
that I'm dealing with, because,at the end of the day, it's
about going home to my familyand my kids.
That's my number one priority.
I don't care who you are, whereyou come from.
If you're interacting with me,know that my goal is to protect
(33:14):
you, but I'm going to do what Ineed to do to come home to my
family.
And it's not out of selfishness, like I'm still going to do
everything in my power to helpyou, but if you put me at risk,
I have to do what I need to doto come home.
Speaker 2 (33:26):
When you look at your career now, because I know
you're in a place now where youhave a new job and doing stuff
than where you were when youfirst started.
But how do you view like thefuture, like, are you like
itching to get to a place whereyou're like out Cause, like
that's that's going to take thatdiscipline away?
Or are you trying to finddifferent ways to advance in the
military?
Speaker 1 (33:47):
My number one goal is I'm going to retire.
That wasn't the initial goalwhen I first joined.
The initial plan was to do sixyears my six year contract that
I signed on for.
I moved back to St Louis andjoined the police force in St
Louis with my best friend, davidGriffin, who currently is still
on the police force and adetective in St Louis, and that
was it until I got married andthen continued to kind of change
(34:09):
my ideals of what I wanted todo.
And then I'll tell you, a bigcontributing factor that kind of
ended that plan was the MikeBrown situation happened in St
Louis and I'm not going to sayhow I feel towards either way,
but the big thing that came outfor me was the image of police
dipped very badly in that timeBecause growing up the police
and the firefighters were thebiggest heroes in the world and
(34:30):
the military.
Of course I've dealt with MrKaufman, who was a grade school
parent of mine, and Mr Griffin,who were a police detective and
a firefighter, and they were thetwo coolest guys to me, because
what else is there at thatpoint Besides being a cool guy
in the military?
I didn't have any of those atthe time.
Growing up, you respectedpolice officers when you saw
them, whether they were doing atraffic stop or doing crossing
(34:50):
guard duty or whatever.
The shield that a cop wore wasthe coolest and most respected
thing to me.
And then I had firefighters whosaved lives and put out fires
on a daily basis.
What a trip.
But then we have the incidentinvolving Mike Brown and image
of police in this country reallystarts to go down, and I had a
conversation with myself and Iwas like I don't want to be the
(35:12):
guy that gets yelled at or spaton or called a racist or
anything like that.
I don't want that to be mydaily life, because I want
people to be happy that I showedup to help them, cause that's
the biggest thing is.
It's not about looking good inthe uniform and shiny badge and
all that and having authority.
It's about helping.
(35:33):
And I know a lot of people say,oh, cops aren't properly
trained to do it.
I said, yeah, they're not wrong,we don't receive the best
training, but it's really aboutthe individual.
Yeah, it's always about theperson.
Yeah, exactly, and that's whatI wish a lot of people.
If you listen to this, it'sit's what I want you to
understand is there.
There are a lot of good policeofficers out there, doesn't
matter what color they are.
(35:54):
There are men and women in ourcountry who go into work every
day and put a uniform on becausethey want to better the people
around them and in theircommunity and help them.
Speaker 2 (36:04):
But with that being said and not to push back, but
just in general, because I grewup in a house, my great
grandfather was a detective forthe St Louis Police Department,
so respect the police in ourhouse.
But also my grandpa was verybig on understanding.
Dominique, I got to let youknow that you can't drive in
these certain areas becausethey're going to pull you over.
You can't do this, you can't dothat.
(36:24):
So I had an understanding thatthere are certain things that
are not in my control, that Ijust have to understand but also
respect this, because you havefamily and legacy.
That's involved with that aswell.
When it comes to other people,like I can't speak for the world
, but I personally think thatperson thing goes back to what
(36:45):
we were talking about earlier.
You know certain people fromcollege or from areas that see
you and they think one thing youknow what I'm saying, and so a
weird thing that always happensto me when I'm meeting people.
I don't know why, but peopleare always really nice to me, if
that makes sense.
Nice in the sense that my wifewould tell me this person's mean
(37:06):
to everyone.
So don't be surprised.
If they're mean, then I meetthem.
They're the nicest person ever,and everyone in the room is
like, why are they being nice toyou?
And so it's hard for me to readhow people are.
But certain people will look atsomeone and be like I'm going
to treat him this way, but Ithink he's dumb, or something
like that.
You know, like the stereotypeis built up, and then when you
(37:30):
have certain people that youknow who are in the police
department, you have your preideas of what kind of person
they are.
Speaker 1 (37:35):
You're talking about prejudices.
Yeah, yeah exactly and and no,and it's.
It's a hundred percent true,and it's.
It's everywhere in our world.
It's in every.
I don't care if you're afireman, if you're police, if
you're an office worker, ifyou're a ditch digger, an
electrician.
Everyone has prejudices, andit's, it's not even in them.
They're like well, you'retaught that.
No, you're not you.
(37:58):
Yesterday, I had a medicalemergency at our front gate with
a young man.
He pulled up, had noaffiliation or base, wasn't in
the military, he was a civilian.
He was having an allergicreaction to something, and we
found out he was allergic toavocados and amoxicillin.
In this moment, though, we haveto be cognizant that he could
possibly be on drugs because ofwhere we are located.
Prince George's County, whichis where my base is located, is
(38:21):
equivalent to East St Louis.
That makes sense.
So it's not that I'm taking aprejudice, it's I'm taking a
precautionary measure for myselfand those around me that, yes,
he may say he's having anallergic reaction, but I need to
be safe in case he is lying.
I still treated him as a humanbeing.
He's a 20 old.
He's 20 year oldAfrican-American male, and he's
(38:41):
he had hives all over him.
He was scratching vigorously,you know.
I told him straight up in themoment.
I said okay, you're allergic toavocados and amoxicillin.
I said, great.
I said I'm going to tell youthis right now.
And this is exactly what I saidI don't care if you use drugs,
I do not care.
It is not my goal right now tohook you up because you use
drugs.
I need to know what you mayhave taken so I can save your
(39:02):
life.
I was like have you beenexposed to fentanyl?
Have you been?
Do you do cocaine?
Do you do anything?
And he told me I smoke weed.
I said, great, don't care aboutthat, my medics are on the way
and we're going to take care ofit.
If he would have used, thebiggest fear was fentanyl.
That was the one thing I wantedto find out, because now I and
(39:23):
everyone around me couldpossibly be exposed.
So gloves come on.
And we helped him out.
We got him to the hospital.
I rode with him the whole wayin the ambulance.
I jumped in with him justbecause again, safety reasons,
because I had two small femalemedics who showed up to help him
and just in case, just in casesomething happens, I wanted them
(39:45):
to have someone there toprotect them.
It's not that I wanted to doharm or anything like that, it's
a simple precaution.
Through everything he was fine,got the help he needed, called
us later that day because he hadto leave his vehicle here.
He called us at our desk, said,hey, this is Mr Williams, I'm
here to pick up my vehicle and Isaid cool, we're going to bring
your keys to you.
It's up at the visitor centerand he was on his way.
(40:05):
So that's a positive, you know,very positive and good reaction
.
But we all like we were talkingabout coming back this
prejudice of me having thatreaction as a white we'll just
say police officer, becausethat's what I am at the end of
the day with an African-Americangoes smoothly.
I didn't fear him, I didn'tfeel and threaten anything like
that.
It's about responding to whathappens around me.
It could have gone a differentway.
It a hundred percent Cause,going back to maybe something
(40:26):
that was a negative reaction.
That didn't end up badly.
But we had a individual lastyear who started a shootout off
our base in Morningside County,led police on a vigorous chase
to our main gate.
He crashed his vehicle at theintersection just outside of my
gate, killing one man in anothervehicle.
When he crashed into him,jumped out of his vehicle with a
weapon and ran onto my base.
(40:47):
And for those of you who aren'tfamiliar with how jurisdiction
works, when you come to amilitary base, normally there is
a line of some sort painted onthe ground.
Ours is blue.
When you cross that blue line,you go from whatever county or
city or district you're in let'scall it civilian property to
military property.
So he ran across that blue linearmed with a weapon and the
(41:07):
only thing that I heard was hey,we have someone running on our
base at the main gate with aweapon.
I was police one that day.
I jumped in my vehicle anddrove to the scene.
I had my weapon ready because,like I said before, at the end
of the day it's about me goinghome.
I'm going to do whatever I canto make sure I go home, but I'm
also going to do whatever I canto make sure that everyone
around me is protected, becausemy family, my two kids and my
(41:30):
wife, live on this base.
I'm currently on base in ahouse provided by the government
, but I'm concerned abouteveryone around me, so I was
fully prepared to use my weaponif this man did not adhere to my
instruction.
Luckily, when I got on scene helistened Me and five other
civilian police officers whopulled onto the base, who were
(41:50):
pursuing him, held him atgunpoint.
He listened to our commands,dropped the weapon and we
secured him.
And everyone's like, oh man,that must have been terrible.
You know you could have beenhurt.
You know they could have beenhurt.
Somebody could have been hurt.
They could have been hurt,somebody could have been hurt.
I'm like, yeah, luckily no onewas and sadly someone did lose
their life in the car accidentthat he caused and he's
currently going to have to dealwith that.
And then they're like well, whatif he didn't do what you said?
Then I would have used force.
(42:11):
And they're like, well, do youif it would affect me?
I really think it would.
I don't have this idea that Icould discharge that weapon and
not be affected.
Yeah, but I luckily haven't hadto approach that line.
(42:37):
I have never had to use forcein my career.
It's been 12 years and I prayevery day that I'd never have to
use force.
Most men and women that serveor work in police don't want
that.
We're not these hyped up guyswho you know, you think you know
we want to go over toAfghanistan or Iraq or any of
these countries we may go to andyou think we're about going and
killing people.
We're not.
We want to go home.
We want to come home to thesafety of our families and our
(42:59):
friends and just be normalpeople, right.
Speaker 2 (43:20):
We're just normal men and women who have answered a
call to serve our country to thebest of our ability.
They're upset about wars thatwe're in or places that we're at
in Guantanamo Bay, whatever youthink of.
They're upset with the militaryfor some reason.
What is something that youwould want them to hear from
someone in the military thathelps them understand the true
(43:42):
purpose and why the things thatthey're doing is important, so
that they can have faith in themilitary?
Speaker 1 (43:48):
I would start by saying that, like I said before,
when you meet people in uniform, there are those who have
joined for selfish reasons, andI don't mean that in a negative
way.
I just mean there are those whoare going to join to get their
schooling and get their degreeand get out because it's free.
I have no problem with that Ifyou have a goal.
My biggest thing to my youngairmen and my troops is if you
have a goal and you want toachieve it, do it.
(44:10):
Don't let people change yourmind.
So, those who join with selfishreasons, there are those who
join to serve, just to serve, ormaybe it's something that's
been in their family legacy fora hundred years.
They've been serving sinceworld war, one in their family,
or those who just didn't knowtheir way, like me.
But at the end of the day,people put this uniform on for a
reason, and I believe that it'salways for a good reason.
(44:33):
We're here to serve the peopleof this country.
We're here to protect yes, wemay go to these countries and be
involved in these wars andconflicts, because that's what
our government and country isdoing.
And you could say you have achoice and we do, and we don't
have a choice to say no to thatbecause there's repercussions If
(44:53):
I say no, I can't wake uptomorrow and say I don't want to
do my job, I don't want to goto work, I can't do that, I can
go to jail and I'm not going tojail.
Yeah, now, I'm allowed toquestion certain things.
I am 100% allowed to questionorders if they are unlawful.
When you see people in themilitary and even if we do have
bad eggs, everywhere, anywhereand everywhere, someone's got
(45:15):
someone who's doing somethingmischievous or bad or has
committed some sort of crime,whether that's in the military
or in big finance or theindustrial complex.
People do bad things all thetime and I wish I had an answer
to how to fix that.
But I believe the majority ofthe United States military.
We are here because we'veanswered a call not to protect
(45:35):
the United States as this ideaof a country or you know
everyone complains about.
You know you, you serve a pieceof paper that being the
constitution or the bill ofrights, and or your forefathers
didn't want this and thoughtthat's not why people are in.
We're here because, at the endof the day, if one of our big
threats comes knocking at ourdoor.
If it's China, if it's Russia,if it's North Korea, if it's
(45:58):
Iran, we are going to be theones who stand up and say we
will be the first ones in lineto prevent the rest of you from
being hurt or worse.
We're here because we have tobe With the United States.
You wouldn't have this greatcountry to live in, where you
get to go out down the streetand wave foreign flags and wave
(46:24):
different ideals and not belocked up or shot for it,
because you live in the land ofthe free and the home of the
brave.
You get to have your opinionsbecause we live in this country
and our first amendment protectsthat.
And I protect that right byserving, and I will never
diminish anyone for using theirrights.
(46:44):
You have every right in theworld.
You can come stand.
You can come stand in my frontgate right now and you can call
me the worst things in the world.
So long as you don't cross thatline and you don't try to hurt
me or anyone else or any, Iwon't do anything to you.
I'll let you say your word.
You can say the rudest, crudestthings about me.
The president, the currentpresident, the next president
and the president after him.
(47:05):
We are going to still be here,the next president and the
president after him.
We are going to still be herethe next day, ready to fight,
ready to defend you and yourfamily and everyone that you
love from the worst possiblethings that may come.
I truly believe this is the.
I don't agree with everythingin our country.
Trust me, from left ideals toright ideals, I don't agree with
everything.
I like to think I'm the guy inthe middle.
If I could walk, if I coulddrive 20 minutes into that city
(47:27):
center, into that Senatebuilding and be the guy whose
job it is to stand in the middleof that aisle to call everyone
out on their crap, I would.
I a hundred percent would.
But at the end of the day, themen and women of this, of the
military and the armed service,are here to protect, serve and
be loyal to the American people,and that's what I feel like
(47:49):
we've lost in the past few years, since the pandemic, is the
idea that we are Americans first.
That's what we need to be, nomatter what your heritage is, no
matter where you've come from.
You are an American and we needto be Americans together, not
American Republicans, notAmerican Democrats, not American
(48:11):
.
Whatever you want to attach toit, you are an American.
Ryan O'Fallon is American.
Dom Hudley is American, notAfrican American.
He's American and that's what Ican't stress enough is everyone
around me is an American, nomatter where you came from, even
if you just got here yesterdayand you're applying for
citizenship, you're an Americanand my job is to make sure that
(48:36):
those freedoms are protectedevery day from all enemies,
foreign and domestic use forother sweets of any kind.
Speaker 3 (48:50):
Since the day came around, from the start, I
instantly made up my mindSweeter sweetness can't be found
(49:12):
.
You're so sweet, can't be beat.
Nothing's forever still on feet.
Speaker 2 (49:28):
I chose this specific performance because I still
remember like it was yesterday.
The first person I saw when Iwalked onto the stage to sing
this song was Ryan.
He was mid-audience, smack dab,in my view, the first person I
saw and it was kind of a warningthat this was going to be a
great night for me and it'sstill one of my favorite
(49:50):
performances I've ever put on mysenior cabaret back at
Southeast.
It was game seven of the WorldSeries.
The Cardinals won that night.
Ryan had a St Louis cap on, ofcourse.
It was just all love.
So just wanted to share alittle bit of the old school and
the older performances I havein my tank of stuff.
But you can listen to my othermusic on all streaming platforms
(50:12):
and if you have any desires forsupporting me as an artist, go
to DomLamorecom where you canget anything and everything.
Dom Lamore, it's sweeter whenyou stay.
Speaker 3 (50:30):
Yeah Well, I'm taking sips from your tipsy lips.
It seems that my faith in youdrifts.
Your perfection will be known,Honey.
Oh silent.
Your connection with me, girlHoney.
Speaker 2 (50:55):
Once again, I just appreciate your time and your
words.
You've been very great man.
It's just always incredible tohear you and how you've grown
from when I first met you andI'm so proud of you With this
show.
I want to be positive.
I feel like it gets to thepoint where sometimes you're
listening to these episodeswhether it's about us speaking
(51:18):
about grief, us speaking abouttrials and tribulations,
speaking about the state of theworld.
Sometimes it can get realnegative when you're talking
about reality.
But this season I purposefullywanted to include a new segment
right before our last segmentcalled you Know what I Love?
The way this works is verysimple.
(51:39):
I'm gonna tell you somethingthat's in the world right now
that's bringing me joy, and I'mgonna be like you know what?
I love this and I love itbecause of this reason Short and
(52:09):
sweet, no need to be a big deal.
And then I'll ask you the exactsame thing, and I feel like
this whole holiday season was alittle difficult for me and I
always feel like when I bringher around to complex situations
, no matter what situation it is, I can try my best to think I
know how my wife is going toreact, but she always surprises
me by being even better andamazing.
So I wanted to make sure that Ishowed some love to her and and
(52:32):
spoke that out.
But what do you got going on inyour mind?
What is something that you loveright now?
Speaker 1 (52:37):
You know what I love?
I love snow.
Speaker 2 (52:40):
Yeah, yeah, is it actual snow?
I heard it was sleep.
Speaker 1 (52:44):
No, we, we got 10 inches oh that's good stuff.
That's heard it was sleep.
No, we, we got 10 inches.
Oh, that's good stuff.
That's good stuff.
I, I love snow because of boththe joy and calmness it brings
to me.
The past two days of snow we'vehad on the ground, I've been
able to come home from my twoeight hour shifts that I've
worked, get under, relax for abit, get dressed, take both of
(53:06):
my children out and watch themplay in the snow.
Speaker 2 (53:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (53:09):
But the other part that I love is I go to work at
three in the morning and it'sdark and I walk out to my truck
and it's snowing and it's quietand it's peaceful, and you feel
this overwhelming sense of ease,standing and the only thing you
can hear is the wind blowingpast you and your and your boots
(53:30):
crunching the snow under yourfeet.
It is a very calming andbeautiful thing that I've always
loved, both in the snow and inthe rain, but mainly right now
it's the snow, so I I really asmuch as headache is is caused.
I've enjoyed having this amountof snow around us for the past
two days.
Speaker 2 (53:50):
All right, man, we made it to the end of the show
and spoken about everything thatwe want to speak about.
Last thing I always ask on theshow after we've spoken about
what we want to speak about.
All I want to know now is howdo you feel?
Speaker 1 (54:02):
I feel good.
You know, anytime having aconversation with you is is
always a bonus to me.
Anytime I get to speak to oneof my truest and greatest
friends, you know, it brings, itbrings me back to a center.
Almost Like I was telling you,I was having a heck of a day
this past week.
This was my first four daysback since the holiday break,
which were also stressful, andwe had a lot to handle,
(54:24):
especially yesterday at work.
Yeah, state funeral is going on.
For those of you who may notknow, president Carter passed.
I'm at Joint Base Andrews.
We handle that.
He just flew in for the statefuneral.
So a lot going on.
But being able to handleeverything that I handle at work
and come home to not only mywife and kids, but to talk to a
true friend, is always a goodcenter point for me.
(54:44):
So being able to do it, whetherit's here on the podcast or on
a phone call, or even it's justthe text, it gives me that sense
of center that I'm alwayslooking for.
Yeah, feeling great, alwaysgood to, always good to talk to
you, my guy.
Amen, cheers to you.
I love you, man, she devilstill the end, hey she devils
Cheers to.
Speaker 2 (55:12):
I want to thank you for listening to the Black man
Talking Emotions podcast.
The opening quote credit goesto Plato and shout out to my guy
, ryan O'Fallon, for being onthe pod.
Ryan, you can follow him onInstagram at O'Fallon Ryan.
That's what it's all about.
Please subscribe to the podcast, share the podcast and give us
a good rating five stars, please, and thank you.
(55:33):
You can support the show byclicking the link at the bottom
of the episode description.
If you liked this episode, youshould check out our previous
episode that I did with anotherclose friend and former
roommates of Ryan and I titledNavigating Entertainment and
Politics in Los Angeles withMark Richards.
It's a great listen.
Check it out.
Follow me at D-O-M underscoreL-A-M-O-U-R on Instagram or at
(55:58):
DomLamorecom.
I'm Dom Lamore, much love.
One of my troops is a homosexual.
Not only that, he's ahomosexual black man.
Dom Treat him no different thanany other troop, any other
person that I meet, because he'sa human being like me.
I took all of this that I gotfrom Cape Girardeau and it still
helps me in my 12 year militarycareer today.
The people that I met downthere may have not been my
favorite people, but they alltaught me lessons.
(00:21):
They all taught me somethingand I've taken it with me every
day.
Now, some of them, if I seethem on the you know, if I see
them outside, they may not get apositive wave from me, I might
cross to the other side of thestreet, but I'll still see them
and go in my head.
You taught me something, goodor bad or indifferent, you
taught me something and it stillsticks with me.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
Ladies and gentlemen and anyone else who is here, my
name is Dom LaMoure and you arelistening to the Black man
Talking Emotions podcast.
On today's episode, I speakwith close friend Ryan O'Fallon
about going to college in CapeGirardeau, life in the Air Force
and growth.
Ask not what your country cando for you.
(01:21):
Ask what you can do for yourcountry.
You're as St Louis as possibleright now.
You got a blue shirt on All day, every day City hat on PGA
Belle Reve Budweiser rightbehind your hat.
It's stupid how ridiculously StLouis you are right.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
Now, it's in the blood man.
Right, it's in the blood manit's in the blood.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Oh, my god, like you, wake up.
Like what else can I make stlouis?
Oh, I'm wearing city socks.
There it, there it is.
I was just about to say I betyou socks or drawers or st louis
, and that is hilarious, perfect.
Thank you, man.
Thank you for doing this.
I've had pretty much all mycore friends on this.
You were one of the last, Ibelieve.
(02:08):
I'm trying to think of who elseI haven't had on, but you were
the one of the ones that wantedto do first season, but I just
didn't have enough time to fityou in and make a compelling
episode with.
So, thank you.
I know we're going to talkmilitary stuff eventually, but I
wanted to go further than that.
I want to go back to college.
I wanted to go back to usmeeting in the time machine.
(02:32):
Yeah, yeah.
And the reason why is one thingthat happens on this podcast a
lot is we get to talking and alot of stories from simo arise
and people go through theirturmoil, people go through their
pleasures, people go throughanything that made them feel in
college.
And one person.
(02:53):
If you were to say, dominique,who's the one person you think
that is the most negative aboutCMO, I would put you at the top
of that list faster than any oneelse so wanted to talk.
And we're not going to justtalk negatively.
Of course we'll start off withsome of the like just trying to
understand more of why it was acertain way for you.
(03:13):
But then by the end I want to.
I want some positives from CapeJard, or why you enjoyed or at
least what you take from yourlessons in the city.
So kind of give people a eyeview of your frustrations with
Southeast Missouri StateUniversity.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
I enjoyed it starting out there.
You know we started in the fallof 2009.
We all came together.
You'd already been there for ayear, being a class ahead of me.
Two years, two years oh it wastwo years.
Good Lord, you, old man.
Two years, two years oh it wastwo years.
Good Lord, you, old man.
But you know, showing up andmeeting all these new people is
first time on your own and I'm avery loyal person, as you know.
(03:55):
So, bringing these new peopleinto my life, I wanted them to
be as close as they possiblycould to me.
So I have always had this viewof.
I have this very long reach offriendship.
I put it out there immediately.
I put myself out there and hereI am as I am.
Accept me, please.
Yeah, with all the you know thebroken problems I had, my anger
(04:15):
being the number one cause.
I guarantee the peoplelistening who did know me back
then, no, I was a very angry guy, yeah, and that comes from just
a long time of of bullying,from when I was a kid, bullied
viciously through grade schooland then came into high school
and came into my own.
But I wanted that friendship tostart, so it started out really
good there at the beginning,but then, as we kept going
through the years, I startednoticing people starting to
(04:38):
leave me behind or they wouldsay one thing to my face, but
then I was hearing everythingelse that was coming from behind
my back and I didn't know aboutit because a lot of people
didn't trust me for some reasonand I didn't feel I was doing
too many untrusting things.
I was this very selfish guy fora little while, was doing my
own thing.
I'd been hurt a lot.
Women in my past had drugged medown For a while.
(04:58):
There I was a womanizer, hencethe she-devil-ness came out of
me and I was very much.
I'm not looking for anyone.
I'm not looking to try to bewith one singular person.
I was trying to be with a lotof people just for fun.
In that course, I heard a lotof people in the progress of
doing that, not realizing it atthe time.
Obviously, 2011 is when I leftand then 2012 is when I joined.
(05:19):
So a lot of time to reflect, 10plus years of time to reflect
on some of the decisions I'vemade.
So I can understand where somepeople had a problem with me,
but in the end I felt that I wasa very loyal person, a very
loyal friend, and I wassurrounded by a lot of people
who weren't loyal to me and thathurt, because I put myself out
there.
So much for so many people justto find out that they had this
(05:40):
very negative view of me and,instead of confronting me
because they felt I'd be tooangry to talk to which I
wouldn't have been if you wouldhave sat me down and said, hey,
I have a problem, let's talkabout it.
I would have done that, but somany people were scared of my
reaction that, instead of comingto me, they went behind my back
and, man, you know, I turnedaround and I found so many
knives there that I was shockedby it.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
Yeah, especially because we're performance majors
, of course.
So in the theater departmentthere's always going to be some
type of gossip or stereotypesand, weirdly, I remember I'm not
even going to say who it was,but there was this girl that
maybe three years after collegewe had got drinks, hung out and
(06:23):
she was telling me about how.
You know, I always wanted toget to know you more and I was,
I was attracted to you orwhatever.
And I'm like, OK, because shehad boyfriend at this point so
she can talk freely.
And she's like I just I alwaysfelt like you were just a player
, you were this guy who alwayshad all these women and this and
that, and I was like, wait aminute, Did you ever like, like
(06:46):
really you felt that way.
She's like I don't know, I justfeel like I kind of noticed you
walking around and everyonewould talk this way about you
and I just kind of heard whatyou were and thought that's what
you were, but that's not reallyyou, and I'm like I don't
understand how we could havebeen somewhere for so long and
grew up together.
I feel like a lot of us grew upand became adults and actually
(07:10):
molded ourselves into who we arein this place with these people
, but then you can have a momentwhere someone is like I treated
you like a person from arm'slength.
I treated you like a personfrom arm's length.
I didn't want to have you thatclose because the rumors about
you told me one thing about youthat I didn't realize wasn't
(07:31):
true.
It just blows my mind how oftenthat happened.
Speaker 1 (07:34):
Yeah, it happened quite a lot and that's why I
gravitated and we've talkedabout this to the older classmen
, the more veteran men around me, because I could see that I
connected more with you, withMark, with Tommy, with Jeff
Holtmeyer, with Lopenote, withthe list goes on.
I felt more a part of thatclass than I did my own class,
(07:59):
which kind of hurt because, likeI've said, my class is my class
.
These are my people and thecore group that came in with me.
I felt the responsibility to beloyal to them because they were
my class and that was verypersonal to me at the time.
And then later on I found outthat some of those were the
biggest people going aroundsaying a lot of things about me
(08:20):
that I didn't know about, thatmy wife had to tell me about
years later and that kind ofrealization like wow, I really
had this one train of thoughtabout that time there.
And now it's been very skewed.
As you said, I'm the number onehater when it comes to Cape
Girardeau and Southeast and thetheater department, and it's
because I found out so muchstuff after we were gone that it
(08:44):
just really destroyed the twoand a half years of the time
that I had there.
For those of you who may or maynot be listening, I'm not
blaming you.
I have a lot of stuff that wasmy own fault and I take
responsibility for that.
I made terrible choices.
I left there because I had poorgrades, because I made bad
choices, because I wanted toparty and drink and live it up.
So don't think I'm sitting heresaying it's all your fault that
(09:10):
my college time was the worst,because at the end of the day,
even though I may have anegative view, I came out of
there with some of the greatestpeople that I still have the
pleasure of knowing, to includeyou, mark Richard, tommy Statler
, who I've lost touch with,sadly, but I still see every now
and then on Facebook and socialmedia.
So I, tommy, you're listening.
I wish you well, buddy, and Ihope we can connect soon to Jeff
(09:31):
Holtmeyer, who called me and Istill one of my favorite things
that Jeff did right before Ideployed to Saudi Arabia he
called me, wished me the bestand told me that if he needed,
if I needed anything legally toinvolve my family, a
distribution of assets, godforbid anything happened to me
that he was willing to do thosethings for me I hadn't talked to
Jeff in I don't know how manyyears before that phone call and
he still reached out, knowingwhere I was going.
(09:54):
It's amazing I met so many greatpeople who are still a part of
my life in one way or another,whether that's me and you, who
talk on a regular basis.
We just saw each other justabout two weeks ago.
Yep had on a regular basis.
We just saw each other justabout two weeks ago had lunch.
You know, mark and I haven'tseen each other in a while time.
But, mark, I've talked to Markfour times last year, five times
, which, in the line of workwe're all in, is amazing that we
(10:14):
got to connect that many times.
Because I'm on the East coast,he's on the West coast, you're
down in Georgia with me on theEast coast, but our lives are so
spread that we still find theseperfect little moments.
Whether it's midday or late atnight, we end up on the phone
for about an hour, hour and ahalf.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
Yeah, which is beautiful.
That is something that I reallydo count my blessings on.
How often I get to speak topeople that I've known for a
long time, I feel like it'ssomething that I truly pride
myself on.
Being a person who is able tokeep a relationship with someone
genuine for years and years,and that's so dope to be able to
(10:51):
have these moments and to beable to even reminisce about,
you know, a time where we allwere together.
And the one thing that I'mreally glad to hear and I was
going to ask, but I feel like Idon't even really have to now
because you do it already yousee your flaws in the things
that happened back then, thenegativity.
You still can sit back and belike you know what?
I still have some of the bestpeople around me.
(11:12):
I have my wife and my familybecause of that place, so, like
you still see the good that camefrom it, but also you see that
you could have handled thingsdifferently.
Oh, so much yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:21):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:21):
And I feel like that's something that I talk
about a lot to people where Ihear someone say I wish I can go
back and change this.
I wish I can go back, and it'slike if you change it, you
wouldn't learn from it.
So, being in a place now whereyou can actually look back and
be like man, I could have donethis better, but now I'm
becoming a better person myself,I'm pushing myself to do the
right things, that's the growthas an adult.
(11:59):
That's what it's all aboutSeeing what you could do better
and doing better period.
Yeah, I always think of Cape inpositive light because of the
relationships I built there.
But when I talk about but Ireally embraced the city of Cape
Girardeau and I go there on theway home most of the time.
When I drive to St Louis, Istop through Cape every time.
Speaker 1 (12:13):
I'm almost jealous of it because I wish that I had
that path, because, coming fromDC, I go up through Pennsylvania
, west Virginia, ohio,indianapolis and then Illinois.
So I come through from the top,you're coming from the bottom.
I would love to be able to godown and revisit.
Go to Burritoville, god do.
Speaker 2 (12:29):
I miss Burritoville.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
What was the Cajun restaurant down there on
Broussard's?
One of the best bread puddings,etouffee.
It tastes just like.
Burritoville, the alligator,etouffee and a bread pudding
after, if I ever end up on deathrow for whatever reason, that
might be top five last meals.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
Yep, I actually took Adrian to Lambert's.
We went there a couple ofmonths ago maybe in October I
think and it was everything Likedude next to us got hit by a
roll.
You got the full experience ofLambert.
She caught her one.
I had me a huge Arnold Palmerright next to me.
(13:11):
It was the.
It reminded me exactly how Iwas and I had oh my God, I had
the most country thing I've hadin a while.
I had the white beans andbologna that they made.
That's like the most countryever.
I was eating the white beansand the bologna with the big
(13:35):
roll and they have the applebutter and the fried okra.
Speaker 1 (13:41):
Macaroni and tomatoes .
Speaker 2 (13:42):
It was amazing man, and I feel like those are the
things that it's hard for me tohate completely on southeast
missouri, because it introducedme to so many things that I
still cherish, like, oh,lambert's.
Like I only can do lambert'slike once a year, but when I do
it it's it's always reminds meof the fun times we had in
(14:03):
college.
You remember we drove downthere once and just it was just,
let's go to Lambert's, fuck it.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
We did it on a whim.
We went there for one of ifwe're going to go, we want to
switch to a little bit ofpositive of Cape Girardeau.
That was one of my birthdays,one of my first birthdays down
there.
A bunch of us went down for mybirthday to Lambert's and that
remember when they used to servethe country fried steak in the
pan.
(14:27):
They make it in the pan andthen serve it to you in a pan
with green beans, mashedpotatoes and all the fixings and
then they gave you that to-gocup, that mug.
Speaker 2 (14:38):
The thing is I forgot about the mug.
When we walked in and sat atthe table and they put the mug
down, I was like, oh my god, Iforgot.
This is how you drink the drinkhere.
Speaker 1 (14:47):
You get to keep it ah , that's the best part you get.
They don't charge you extrathat well they.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
Now you can't keep it , and I almost bought one
because I was like damn, I usedto have one of these and I don't
know where mine is.
Mine is in la somewhere.
Some dudes got it at a pawnshop, more or less.
Speaker 1 (15:07):
Mine's somewhere in Jeff and Maggie's house.
I know that it's somewhere.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
I got to find one, Like I was going to buy one
because the newer ones are great, but they all.
It's exactly how it was.
What would be something youcould say helped you get you to
where you are now?
You have a family, you'reworking, you have a house over
your head, like you're not a bumon the streets.
How did Cape Girardeau propelyou to where you are now?
Speaker 1 (15:29):
Cape taught me that I had a lot of growing up to do.
For those of you who don't knowthe reason why I had to not had
to, but the reason why I chosethe military and we'll get to
that that career part of it, butI went home after being
academically suspended from CapeGirardeau.
I part of it, but I went homeafter being academically
suspended from Cape Girardeau.
I let my grades drop too far.
They were like hey, you know,we understand, but you need to
take a semester off and you cancome back in the fall.
(15:51):
I had a choice to make and atthe time y'all were leaving.
That was your graduating yearand I'm still upset with myself
that I got suspended, that Imissed out on a lot not being
down there.
I still came down almost everyother weekend to party and hang
out, but I missed out on so manythings being with you guys
graduating.
So my plan was to go with.
I knew you guys were going toLA, so I was like I'm going with
(16:13):
you, I don't need no dangdegree, I can just get into the
industry.
Yeah, and everyone's like that.
You know, blah, blah, blah,blah, blah Talking in my ear.
You know if you don't have adegree.
And I said you know what?
I don't care, I'm willing towork for it.
And I had found a stuntmanschool in California that I
wanted to go to and I could getmy license as a stuntman.
(16:33):
And I was like, well, I don'tgot to be an actor, I'll be the
guy that gets thrown through aglass window.
Heck, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll doall this crazy stuff.
So I was going to go home, workwith my, my mom, get another
job and just save my money andlive with mom and dad and save
up 10 grand to go to the school.
Yeah, however, I have a verystrict, very hard nose, but
(16:54):
loving father and my father didnot like that plan in the
slightest.
Yeah.
And he came to me one day andhe said either you go back to
school in the fall or you'repaying rent.
And at the time, as a21-year-old kid at the time and
I say kid for those of youlistening if you're around you
are still a kid at the age of 21.
(17:14):
You can go buy alcohol, you arestill a kid.
He said either go back or payrent.
And I said F you, dad, I ain'tdoing that.
That showed me that I needed togrow, so going forward, the
positives that came out werejust simply I saw that there was
an error in my decision-making,that I wasn't using
self-responsibility, which isthe biggest thing.
(17:35):
If I can teach anyone anythingin this world,
self-responsibility is the bestthing that you can have, having
the mentality to sit there andgo.
This was my fault.
Even though some things mayhave been out of my control.
I still have a part to play andI need to take the
responsibility for that.
So I said, okay, it's time togrow, it's time to move on.
The positives coming out againwe're having friends like you
(17:57):
and Mark by my side.
You were groomsmen in mywedding, which is still one of
the greatest things.
You all still owe me money.
Fyi, you all never paid up onthe bet.
I didn't shed a single tear.
You did cry.
What are you talking about?
I didn't cry.
You didn't cry that day.
No, not during the ceremony.
Speaker 2 (18:14):
You all said I would cry it wasn't during the
ceremony.
Speaker 3 (18:16):
The bet was I would cry.
Speaker 1 (18:18):
You said I would cry during the ceremony and I did
not.
I ceremony and I did not.
I didn't show the whole day.
No, it was not, sir.
I remember.
I'm not wrong, you are wrongsorry, you remember that uh,
I'll tell you a great positiveand I'm sure we might talk about
this a little bit the LGBTQcommunity.
(18:39):
I met some amazing people.
It was my first exposure topeople in those categories
people like Jess Love if she'sever listened to this, one of
the best people I've.
I met some amazing people.
It was my first exposure topeople in those categories
People like Jess Love if she'sever listened to this, one of
the best people I've known.
We've lost touch over the years,but having people like them in
my life and learning about whyand how this all happened was
huge for a Irish Catholic kidfrom South City.
(19:02):
I didn't have that exposure.
I always knew about it.
My uncle, chris God rest hissoul just passed away.
He was gay but I didn't.
I didn't understand it growingup and then you know, obviously,
growing through the time thatwe grew up, you know it was
always a bullying thing callingyou gay or you know any one of
the slurs which I won't use, butI didn't get it.
So when those kind of cognitivescame out and then I met people
(19:24):
who were of that persuasion, Icame to realize oh, they're
normal people, they're just likeme, they just like their same
sex or other, whatever.
They're no different than me.
They bleed like me, they lovelike me, they drink like me,
some drink better than me andthey were beautiful people.
So my view towards the peopleof those selections are is
massive.
My view towards the people ofthose selections are is massive,
(19:46):
and I'll I'll swerve into mymilitary career just a little
bit.
Logan Ireland is a mastersergeant.
He's currently serving in ourair force and is a transgendered
woman to man, and he'scurrently a man, formerly Sarah
Ireland.
I met him when he wastransitioning and he's one of
the greatest people I've met inmy career still serving today.
You want to talk about being ina foxhole with somebody.
You want someone on your backwhen you're in the head in the
(20:08):
shit pardon my French that man.
I want him in the foxhole nextto me because I know I'm going
home alive, because he's afighter.
If I didn't meet people likethat in Cape Girardeau and then
came into the military, I mighthave a different view, and I
don't.
One of my troops is ahomosexual.
Not only that, he's ahomosexual black man, dom.
Treat him no different than anyother troop, any other person
(20:29):
that I meet, because he's ahuman being like me.
I took all of this that I gotfrom Cape Girardeau and it still
helps me in my 12 year militarycareer today.
The people that I met downthere may have not been my
favorite people, but they alltaught me lessons.
They all taught me somethingand I've taken it with me every
day.
Now some of them, if I see themon the you know, if I see them
outside, they may not get apositive wave from me.
(20:50):
I might cross to the other sideof the street, but I'll still
see them and go in my head.
You taught me something, goodor bad or indifferent.
You taught me something and itstill sticks with me.
Speaker 2 (21:01):
That's important and that's dope me something and it
still sticks with me.
That's important and that'sdope and that's a different view
of Cape Girardeau than youwould hear from most folks.
Most folks talk about SoutheastMissouri and how conservative
it is down there and, like gaypeople have a huge community in
this space still, and they werevery much in all areas of the
(21:24):
city.
When I was downtown working atBuckner's, it wasn't unnatural
to see drag queens come and doshows at Buckner's.
They used to have a whole dragshow at Cape Port Cape Like.
It was not odd, it was, it wasa part of the culture.
That was really, really dope.
And that's such a dope lessonto take from Cape Cheesy dope
(21:46):
lesson to take from Cape Cheesyand to continue to hopefully
give people a differentunderstanding of what it's like
in Southeast Missouri.
It's not as bad as people makeit out in.
Missouri has its problems, butI loved my time in Cape and the
people that I met and it wasjust incredible.
And the people that I met andit was just incredible.
I've known Ryan since before Imet him.
(22:08):
Actually, he was an item with afriend of mine from high school
and I was told to look out forhim when he made it down to
Southeast Missouri StateUniversity.
Ryan and I have been through alot together and I initiated him
into my family and our theatergroup frat but not really a frat
, it's the university playerswith nerds.
(22:30):
My family was the she Devils andyou hear that that comes up
earlier in the pod and later onin the pod.
He and I lived with each otherat one point during my senior
year and we have kept in touchwhile he has been moving around
the country as a security forcesofficer.
So I'm so proud of him and hisfamily and I send nothing but
(22:51):
love their way and I very muchappreciate him taking some time
and coming on the pod andsharing his story and I hope
people can kind of get a goodvisual of what kind of person he
is and the type of person thatI see in him.
I think he's just an incredibleperson.
Move into your life now becauseyou left that, had to make a
(23:24):
huge decision because of anultimatum and ended up where you
are now and I know being in themilitary has its ups and downs
and different things but kind ofgive people a picture of why
you chose the military and howit's formed you into who you are
now.
Speaker 1 (23:42):
So, before I start in my military career, my name is
Staff Sergeant Ryan O'Fallon.
I am currently a member of the316th Security Forces Squadron.
Any opinions or views that Imay speak about in this podcast
do not reflect the United StatesAir Force or the United States
government or any officers thatserve above me, to include the
president of the United Statessecretary of defense or the
(24:02):
joint chiefs of staff.
With that being said, it'salways fun, you know, because
real is real.
I'm a member of the UnitedStates Air Force, I'm a member
of the military and I losecertain freedoms.
I'm a protector of freedoms,but I lose certain freedoms in
serving this country.
So I have to be very careful inletting people know that my
(24:26):
views may align with yours ornot, and I'm still going to put
that uniform on every day andserve the people of this country
.
But getting started in how thiscame about.
So, as I said before, dad givesme that ultimatum, says, hey,
pay rent or go back to school.
Well, I didn't want to go backto school because I just had no
(24:47):
desire to be there anymore.
I loved being down there witheveryone, but the biggest thing
I was fighting was I was goingto school for a BFA in acting
and directing.
For those of you who don't knowBachelor in Fine Arts, acting,
directing.
I wanted to be an actordirector.
No, bachelor in fine arts,acting, directing.
I wanted to be an actor, anactor director, and I loved the
theater classes.
I loved stage combat.
That was my niche.
If anyone knew me, you knewstage combat was my thing.
(25:12):
But I couldn't stand going to mymy regular classes.
I hated math.
I was terrible.
That's ultimately why I leftwas math.
I failed the same math classthree times and that's not
because I didn't go, that'sbecause I was bad at it.
I just couldn't do it.
It was terrible at science.
The only classes I passed whenI was down there that weren't
theater related were Englishliterature and history.
Those are the only classes Icould pass.
I couldn't pass anything else.
Going forward I was like, well,I can't go back to school and I
(25:34):
want to go to LA, but I don'thave enough money and I can't
stay here in my dad's housebecause eventually it was going
to come to blows between my dadand I.
So one night, sitting with mymother and we were watching a
popular TV show back in thattime called Justified.
Justified is about a US marshalin Harlan County, kentucky.
One of my favorite shows, stillone of my go-tos, if I got
(25:54):
something I need to stream.
And mom was like well, what areyou going to do?
And I said I don't know, mom, Ijust I got to figure something
out and she goes.
Well, what about that?
And she pointed at the TV toTimothy Oliphant on the screen
and I'm like mom, I can't goback to school.
I thinking she was talking aboutacting.
She's like no, what about you,love?
You know him in the US Marshals, you could do that.
(26:15):
She's like well, what about themilitary?
And he said you told me Icouldn't join the military.
That was my original plan.
My original plan was 18 yearsold, graduate high school and go
sign up for the Marine Corps.
She was like well, I kind ofchanged my mind because you need
something.
I said, okay, I'll go talk to aMarine recruiter.
So dad came the next morning andobviously I didn't want to do
(26:37):
this without telling my fatherbecause I knew there'd be just
you know, boy, and you talked tome about it and I didn't want
to deal with that.
Dad, if you listen to this, youknow I love you.
So the next day I tell myfather.
I said, dad, I'm not paying yourent and I'm not going back to
school, I'm going to go join theMarines.
And he goes you're not joiningthe Marines, I'm trying to get
(27:02):
there and you can't stop me.
He goes no, you're going tojoin the Air Force.
And I said, dad, I don't want tojoin the chair force.
Even I made fun of it.
Everybody, yeah, he goes.
No, come down to my building.
At the time my dad worked forfederal protective services
downtown near Scott trade.
In the federal building he saidcome down and talk to Captain
Stone, who was my boss.
He was in the Air Force for 20years and he was a recruiter on
point.
Come talk to him.
So I went down, talked toCaptain Stone.
(27:22):
He sold me on the Air Force.
Speaker 2 (27:24):
What was the big like okay.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
Air Force, the ease in which the Air Force can
provide access to schooling andthe access to allowing you the
opportunity to do it whileyou're working.
He really sold me on how thejob is.
Whatever job you got, the AirForce is very flexible in its
operations.
So I was like okay, let me gohook up with a recruiter,
(27:47):
because obviously Captain Stone,who worked with my dad,
couldn't do that for me.
So he hooked me up with one ofhis buddies, tech Sergeant Lewis
Tart.
Sergeant Tart, if you magicallyhear this, you didn't warn me
and I'm coming for you if I everfind you.
So I went and hooked up withTech Sergeant Tartt and he gave
he was like all right, man, tellme about yourself, what you
want to do.
(28:07):
And I was like well, you know,everyone makes jokes about the
chair force and you know theydon't do anything.
And blah, blah, blah.
I said I don't want to.
I was like who are the guysthat do stuff like you know the
badasses?
And he was like well, there's,you know PJ, which is one of our
pararescuemen badass guys.
He told me all the tacticalguys, seer and CCT and all these
(28:28):
cool guys.
I was like all right, I meanthat sounds cool, I said, but
that you know, I don't know ifthat's me.
I was like, what about police?
I was like you guys havemilitary police.
He's like, oh yeah, it's calledsecurity forces.
And I was like, cool, I want todo that because I want to carry
a gun every day.
And everyone might hear thatand think, oh, this guy.
And I said no.
I said the reason why I want tocarry a gun every day is I want
to be able to do something ifthe situation arises.
(28:49):
If something goes down, I wantto be able to defend myself and
those around me with appropriateforce.
So he tells me yeah, got you.
Now, unbeknownst to me at thetime, security forces is one of
the easiest things to get into.
We are one of the top mannedpersonnel in the United States
Air Force.
We have, I think, the biggestcareer field numbers wise.
So he sold me into that.
(29:10):
I signed up and I left for SanAntonio, texas, on October 8th
2012, down to Joint BaseLackland where I did eight weeks
of basic military training.
Joint Base Lackland, where Idid eight weeks of basic
military training, and then Ileft my BMT squadron and drove
600 yards across the base to the343rd Training Squadron for
Security Forces.
I didn't go anywhere, yeah,yeah, to then continue my tech
(29:33):
school training, because a lotof people don't know is if, when
you join the military, you doyour basic training, which
teaches you how to be a basicperson in the military, and then
you go to your technicaltraining, which is your actual
job.
Now it's a little differentwith Air Force, army, navy
Marines.
It's all different.
So then I went to 343rd andtrained from December through
March of 2012 to become asecurity forces member, and then
(29:57):
got my orders to my first everbase, which was Whiteman Air
Force Base in Kansas City,missouri, and when I first got
them, I said, wait, missouri.
I said there's no Air ForceBase in Missouri.
And they went yeah, there is.
I said no, the closest one's inIllinois and it's Scott.
And they said, no, there's onenext to Kansas City.
To that point, 21 years on thisearth had zero idea that
(30:17):
Whiteman Air Force Base is inWarrensburg, missouri, so went
over there in May of 2012 andstarted my career as a security
forces member protecting the B-2bomber and nuclear weapons.
Where are you now?
So now I'm stationed here inbeautiful Washington DC, joint
Base Andrews.
Speaker 2 (30:37):
I'm so proud of you, dude.
That's such a cool position tobe able to say that you're in a
place that's so historic asWashington DC and doing
important work too.
And I understand from the jump,because even in college you
were always very much you wantedto be active, you wanted to do
things with the hands.
You wanted to do stage combatbecause you actually were
(30:58):
essential to helping createsomething.
You were a part of it, you weremaking things happen.
So it only makes sense that youwould go in and do something
that has a purpose like that inthe military.
Speaker 1 (31:09):
I was going to say.
Some people might argue it'sbecause I'm violent and angry.
Speaker 2 (31:12):
Well, I mean you say that, but I mean I feel like
you're a lot more relaxed nowthan you used to be, and that's
because of the military, morelikely, especially now.
You're a lot more grounded andI bet you, your patience is way
more in a place now that if youwere to go through the stuff in
Cape it would upset you in someways.
Yes, but also you have thetraining to keep your cool.
(31:35):
You know what I'm saying.
That's just.
That's just what I'm.
I'm, I'm assuming assumingBecause I know how different you
are now compared to back then.
I was there, I seen it, I was apart of the moment.
Speaker 1 (31:48):
So to be where you are now is great 100% and that's
going back to what we wereleading to earlier was the
discipline is what I needed.
That was what I was leading towhen we were talking about me
leaving Cape Girardeau thepersonal responsibility and
discipline being the biggestthing, and that's what the
military gave me was discipline.
And then to continue talkingabout cool is becoming security
forces, a military policeman.
(32:08):
I've learned that in the past,so I've been for seven years
doing security work, so I didn'treally do anything law
enforcement wise until I gothere in 2019, just before the
pandemic as a law enforcementofficer.
So that's what I primarily worknow and that discipline and
that level-headedness is neededon a day-to-day basis doing my
job, because you never know whatyou're going to walk into.
(32:30):
Because, as much as I don't doas much as my civilian
counterparts whether that be inSt Louis, new York, my own Metro
PD here in DC I don't encounterhalf or even 75% of what they
do, but we still get prettyserious situations here on the
base between the personnel thatwork and live here to the
civilian populace who may comeonto the base and start problems
(32:53):
.
I've discovered that I wanttwofold to be the first guy in
to protect and serve and defendanyone around me, but I also
want to be the first to save thepeople that I and defend anyone
around me, but I also want tobe the first to save the people
that I'm dealing with, because,at the end of the day, it's
about going home to my familyand my kids.
That's my number one priority.
I don't care who you are, whereyou come from.
If you're interacting with me,know that my goal is to protect
(33:14):
you, but I'm going to do what Ineed to do to come home to my
family.
And it's not out of selfishness, like I'm still going to do
everything in my power to helpyou, but if you put me at risk,
I have to do what I need to doto come home.
Speaker 2 (33:26):
When you look at your career now, because I know
you're in a place now where youhave a new job and doing stuff
than where you were when youfirst started.
But how do you view like thefuture, like, are you like
itching to get to a place whereyou're like out Cause, like
that's that's going to take thatdiscipline away?
Or are you trying to finddifferent ways to advance in the
military?
Speaker 1 (33:47):
My number one goal is I'm going to retire.
That wasn't the initial goalwhen I first joined.
The initial plan was to do sixyears my six year contract that
I signed on for.
I moved back to St Louis andjoined the police force in St
Louis with my best friend, davidGriffin, who currently is still
on the police force and adetective in St Louis, and that
was it until I got married andthen continued to kind of change
(34:09):
my ideals of what I wanted todo.
And then I'll tell you, a bigcontributing factor that kind of
ended that plan was the MikeBrown situation happened in St
Louis and I'm not going to sayhow I feel towards either way,
but the big thing that came outfor me was the image of police
dipped very badly in that timeBecause growing up the police
and the firefighters were thebiggest heroes in the world and
(34:30):
the military.
Of course I've dealt with MrKaufman, who was a grade school
parent of mine, and Mr Griffin,who were a police detective and
a firefighter, and they were thetwo coolest guys to me, because
what else is there at thatpoint Besides being a cool guy
in the military?
I didn't have any of those atthe time.
Growing up, you respectedpolice officers when you saw
them, whether they were doing atraffic stop or doing crossing
(34:50):
guard duty or whatever.
The shield that a cop wore wasthe coolest and most respected
thing to me.
And then I had firefighters whosaved lives and put out fires
on a daily basis.
What a trip.
But then we have the incidentinvolving Mike Brown and image
of police in this country reallystarts to go down, and I had a
conversation with myself and Iwas like I don't want to be the
(35:12):
guy that gets yelled at or spaton or called a racist or
anything like that.
I don't want that to be mydaily life, because I want
people to be happy that I showedup to help them, cause that's
the biggest thing is.
It's not about looking good inthe uniform and shiny badge and
all that and having authority.
It's about helping.
(35:33):
And I know a lot of people say,oh, cops aren't properly
trained to do it.
I said, yeah, they're not wrong,we don't receive the best
training, but it's really aboutthe individual.
Yeah, it's always about theperson.
Yeah, exactly, and that's whatI wish a lot of people.
If you listen to this, it'sit's what I want you to
understand is there.
There are a lot of good policeofficers out there, doesn't
matter what color they are.
(35:54):
There are men and women in ourcountry who go into work every
day and put a uniform on becausethey want to better the people
around them and in theircommunity and help them.
Speaker 2 (36:04):
But with that being said and not to push back, but
just in general, because I grewup in a house, my great
grandfather was a detective forthe St Louis Police Department,
so respect the police in ourhouse.
But also my grandpa was verybig on understanding.
Dominique, I got to let youknow that you can't drive in
these certain areas becausethey're going to pull you over.
You can't do this, you can't dothat.
(36:24):
So I had an understanding thatthere are certain things that
are not in my control, that Ijust have to understand but also
respect this, because you havefamily and legacy.
That's involved with that aswell.
When it comes to other people,like I can't speak for the world
, but I personally think thatperson thing goes back to what
(36:45):
we were talking about earlier.
You know certain people fromcollege or from areas that see
you and they think one thing youknow what I'm saying, and so a
weird thing that always happensto me when I'm meeting people.
I don't know why, but peopleare always really nice to me, if
that makes sense.
Nice in the sense that my wifewould tell me this person's mean
(37:06):
to everyone.
So don't be surprised.
If they're mean, then I meetthem.
They're the nicest person ever,and everyone in the room is
like, why are they being nice toyou?
And so it's hard for me to readhow people are.
But certain people will look atsomeone and be like I'm going
to treat him this way, but Ithink he's dumb, or something
like that.
You know, like the stereotypeis built up, and then when you
(37:30):
have certain people that youknow who are in the police
department, you have your preideas of what kind of person
they are.
Speaker 1 (37:35):
You're talking about prejudices.
Yeah, yeah exactly and and no,and it's.
It's a hundred percent true,and it's.
It's everywhere in our world.
It's in every.
I don't care if you're afireman, if you're police, if
you're an office worker, ifyou're a ditch digger, an
electrician.
Everyone has prejudices, andit's, it's not even in them.
They're like well, you'retaught that.
No, you're not you.
(37:58):
Yesterday, I had a medicalemergency at our front gate with
a young man.
He pulled up, had noaffiliation or base, wasn't in
the military, he was a civilian.
He was having an allergicreaction to something, and we
found out he was allergic toavocados and amoxicillin.
In this moment, though, we haveto be cognizant that he could
possibly be on drugs because ofwhere we are located.
Prince George's County, whichis where my base is located, is
(38:21):
equivalent to East St Louis.
That makes sense.
So it's not that I'm taking aprejudice, it's I'm taking a
precautionary measure for myselfand those around me that, yes,
he may say he's having anallergic reaction, but I need to
be safe in case he is lying.
I still treated him as a humanbeing.
He's a 20 old.
He's 20 year oldAfrican-American male, and he's
(38:41):
he had hives all over him.
He was scratching vigorously,you know.
I told him straight up in themoment.
I said okay, you're allergic toavocados and amoxicillin.
I said, great.
I said I'm going to tell youthis right now.
And this is exactly what I saidI don't care if you use drugs,
I do not care.
It is not my goal right now tohook you up because you use
drugs.
I need to know what you mayhave taken so I can save your
(39:02):
life.
I was like have you beenexposed to fentanyl?
Have you been?
Do you do cocaine?
Do you do anything?
And he told me I smoke weed.
I said, great, don't care aboutthat, my medics are on the way
and we're going to take care ofit.
If he would have used, thebiggest fear was fentanyl.
That was the one thing I wantedto find out, because now I and
(39:23):
everyone around me couldpossibly be exposed.
So gloves come on.
And we helped him out.
We got him to the hospital.
I rode with him the whole wayin the ambulance.
I jumped in with him justbecause again, safety reasons,
because I had two small femalemedics who showed up to help him
and just in case, just in casesomething happens, I wanted them
(39:45):
to have someone there toprotect them.
It's not that I wanted to doharm or anything like that, it's
a simple precaution.
Through everything he was fine,got the help he needed, called
us later that day because he hadto leave his vehicle here.
He called us at our desk, said,hey, this is Mr Williams, I'm
here to pick up my vehicle and Isaid cool, we're going to bring
your keys to you.
It's up at the visitor centerand he was on his way.
(40:05):
So that's a positive, you know,very positive and good reaction
.
But we all like we were talkingabout coming back this
prejudice of me having thatreaction as a white we'll just
say police officer, becausethat's what I am at the end of
the day with an African-Americangoes smoothly.
I didn't fear him, I didn'tfeel and threaten anything like
that.
It's about responding to whathappens around me.
It could have gone a differentway.
It a hundred percent Cause,going back to maybe something
(40:26):
that was a negative reaction.
That didn't end up badly.
But we had a individual lastyear who started a shootout off
our base in Morningside County,led police on a vigorous chase
to our main gate.
He crashed his vehicle at theintersection just outside of my
gate, killing one man in anothervehicle.
When he crashed into him,jumped out of his vehicle with a
weapon and ran onto my base.
(40:47):
And for those of you who aren'tfamiliar with how jurisdiction
works, when you come to amilitary base, normally there is
a line of some sort painted onthe ground.
Ours is blue.
When you cross that blue line,you go from whatever county or
city or district you're in let'scall it civilian property to
military property.
So he ran across that blue linearmed with a weapon and the
(41:07):
only thing that I heard was hey,we have someone running on our
base at the main gate with aweapon.
I was police one that day.
I jumped in my vehicle anddrove to the scene.
I had my weapon ready because,like I said before, at the end
of the day it's about me goinghome.
I'm going to do whatever I canto make sure I go home, but I'm
also going to do whatever I canto make sure that everyone
around me is protected, becausemy family, my two kids and my
(41:30):
wife, live on this base.
I'm currently on base in ahouse provided by the government
, but I'm concerned abouteveryone around me, so I was
fully prepared to use my weaponif this man did not adhere to my
instruction.
Luckily, when I got on scene helistened Me and five other
civilian police officers whopulled onto the base, who were
(41:50):
pursuing him, held him atgunpoint.
He listened to our commands,dropped the weapon and we
secured him.
And everyone's like, oh man,that must have been terrible.
You know you could have beenhurt.
You know they could have beenhurt.
Somebody could have been hurt.
They could have been hurt,somebody could have been hurt.
I'm like, yeah, luckily no onewas and sadly someone did lose
their life in the car accidentthat he caused and he's
currently going to have to dealwith that.
And then they're like well, whatif he didn't do what you said?
Then I would have used force.
(42:11):
And they're like, well, do youif it would affect me?
I really think it would.
I don't have this idea that Icould discharge that weapon and
not be affected.
Yeah, but I luckily haven't hadto approach that line.
(42:37):
I have never had to use forcein my career.
It's been 12 years and I prayevery day that I'd never have to
use force.
Most men and women that serveor work in police don't want
that.
We're not these hyped up guyswho you know, you think you know
we want to go over toAfghanistan or Iraq or any of
these countries we may go to andyou think we're about going and
killing people.
We're not.
We want to go home.
We want to come home to thesafety of our families and our
(42:59):
friends and just be normalpeople, right.
Speaker 2 (43:20):
We're just normal men and women who have answered a
call to serve our country to thebest of our ability.
They're upset about wars thatwe're in or places that we're at
in Guantanamo Bay, whatever youthink of.
They're upset with the militaryfor some reason.
What is something that youwould want them to hear from
someone in the military thathelps them understand the true
(43:42):
purpose and why the things thatthey're doing is important, so
that they can have faith in themilitary?
Speaker 1 (43:48):
I would start by saying that, like I said before,
when you meet people in uniform, there are those who have
joined for selfish reasons, andI don't mean that in a negative
way.
I just mean there are those whoare going to join to get their
schooling and get their degreeand get out because it's free.
I have no problem with that Ifyou have a goal.
My biggest thing to my youngairmen and my troops is if you
have a goal and you want toachieve it, do it.
(44:10):
Don't let people change yourmind.
So, those who join with selfishreasons, there are those who
join to serve, just to serve, ormaybe it's something that's
been in their family legacy fora hundred years.
They've been serving sinceworld war, one in their family,
or those who just didn't knowtheir way, like me.
But at the end of the day,people put this uniform on for a
reason, and I believe that it'salways for a good reason.
(44:33):
We're here to serve the peopleof this country.
We're here to protect yes, wemay go to these countries and be
involved in these wars andconflicts, because that's what
our government and country isdoing.
And you could say you have achoice and we do, and we don't
have a choice to say no to thatbecause there's repercussions If
(44:53):
I say no, I can't wake uptomorrow and say I don't want to
do my job, I don't want to goto work, I can't do that, I can
go to jail and I'm not going tojail.
Yeah, now, I'm allowed toquestion certain things.
I am 100% allowed to questionorders if they are unlawful.
When you see people in themilitary and even if we do have
bad eggs, everywhere, anywhereand everywhere, someone's got
(45:15):
someone who's doing somethingmischievous or bad or has
committed some sort of crime,whether that's in the military
or in big finance or theindustrial complex.
People do bad things all thetime and I wish I had an answer
to how to fix that.
But I believe the majority ofthe United States military.
We are here because we'veanswered a call not to protect
(45:35):
the United States as this ideaof a country or you know
everyone complains about.
You know you, you serve a pieceof paper that being the
constitution or the bill ofrights, and or your forefathers
didn't want this and thoughtthat's not why people are in.
We're here because, at the endof the day, if one of our big
threats comes knocking at ourdoor.
If it's China, if it's Russia,if it's North Korea, if it's
(45:58):
Iran, we are going to be theones who stand up and say we
will be the first ones in lineto prevent the rest of you from
being hurt or worse.
We're here because we have tobe With the United States.
You wouldn't have this greatcountry to live in, where you
get to go out down the streetand wave foreign flags and wave
(46:24):
different ideals and not belocked up or shot for it,
because you live in the land ofthe free and the home of the
brave.
You get to have your opinionsbecause we live in this country
and our first amendment protectsthat.
And I protect that right byserving, and I will never
diminish anyone for using theirrights.
(46:44):
You have every right in theworld.
You can come stand.
You can come stand in my frontgate right now and you can call
me the worst things in the world.
So long as you don't cross thatline and you don't try to hurt
me or anyone else or any, Iwon't do anything to you.
I'll let you say your word.
You can say the rudest, crudestthings about me.
The president, the currentpresident, the next president
and the president after him.
(47:05):
We are going to still be here,the next president and the
president after him.
We are going to still be herethe next day, ready to fight,
ready to defend you and yourfamily and everyone that you
love from the worst possiblethings that may come.
I truly believe this is the.
I don't agree with everythingin our country.
Trust me, from left ideals toright ideals, I don't agree with
everything.
I like to think I'm the guy inthe middle.
If I could walk, if I coulddrive 20 minutes into that city
(47:27):
center, into that Senatebuilding and be the guy whose
job it is to stand in the middleof that aisle to call everyone
out on their crap, I would.
I a hundred percent would.
But at the end of the day, themen and women of this, of the
military and the armed service,are here to protect, serve and
be loyal to the American people,and that's what I feel like
(47:49):
we've lost in the past few years, since the pandemic, is the
idea that we are Americans first.
That's what we need to be, nomatter what your heritage is, no
matter where you've come from.
You are an American and we needto be Americans together, not
American Republicans, notAmerican Democrats, not American
(48:11):
.
Whatever you want to attach toit, you are an American.
Ryan O'Fallon is American.
Dom Hudley is American, notAfrican American.
He's American and that's what Ican't stress enough is everyone
around me is an American, nomatter where you came from, even
if you just got here yesterdayand you're applying for
citizenship, you're an Americanand my job is to make sure that
(48:36):
those freedoms are protectedevery day from all enemies,
foreign and domestic use forother sweets of any kind.
Speaker 3 (48:50):
Since the day came around, from the start, I
instantly made up my mindSweeter sweetness can't be found
(49:12):
.
You're so sweet, can't be beat.
Nothing's forever still on feet.
Speaker 2 (49:28):
I chose this specific performance because I still
remember like it was yesterday.
The first person I saw when Iwalked onto the stage to sing
this song was Ryan.
He was mid-audience, smack dab,in my view, the first person I
saw and it was kind of a warningthat this was going to be a
great night for me and it'sstill one of my favorite
(49:50):
performances I've ever put on mysenior cabaret back at
Southeast.
It was game seven of the WorldSeries.
The Cardinals won that night.
Ryan had a St Louis cap on, ofcourse.
It was just all love.
So just wanted to share alittle bit of the old school and
the older performances I havein my tank of stuff.
But you can listen to my othermusic on all streaming platforms
(50:12):
and if you have any desires forsupporting me as an artist, go
to DomLamorecom where you canget anything and everything.
Dom Lamore, it's sweeter whenyou stay.
Speaker 3 (50:30):
Yeah Well, I'm taking sips from your tipsy lips.
It seems that my faith in youdrifts.
Your perfection will be known,Honey.
Oh silent.
Your connection with me, girlHoney.
Speaker 2 (50:55):
Once again, I just appreciate your time and your
words.
You've been very great man.
It's just always incredible tohear you and how you've grown
from when I first met you andI'm so proud of you With this
show.
I want to be positive.
I feel like it gets to thepoint where sometimes you're
listening to these episodeswhether it's about us speaking
(51:18):
about grief, us speaking abouttrials and tribulations,
speaking about the state of theworld.
Sometimes it can get realnegative when you're talking
about reality.
But this season I purposefullywanted to include a new segment
right before our last segmentcalled you Know what I Love?
The way this works is verysimple.
(51:39):
I'm gonna tell you somethingthat's in the world right now
that's bringing me joy, and I'mgonna be like you know what?
I love this and I love itbecause of this reason Short and
(52:09):
sweet, no need to be a big deal.
And then I'll ask you the exactsame thing, and I feel like
this whole holiday season was alittle difficult for me and I
always feel like when I bringher around to complex situations
, no matter what situation it is, I can try my best to think I
know how my wife is going toreact, but she always surprises
me by being even better andamazing.
So I wanted to make sure that Ishowed some love to her and and
(52:32):
spoke that out.
But what do you got going on inyour mind?
What is something that you loveright now?
Speaker 1 (52:37):
You know what I love?
I love snow.
Speaker 2 (52:40):
Yeah, yeah, is it actual snow?
I heard it was sleep.
Speaker 1 (52:44):
No, we, we got 10 inches oh that's good stuff.
That's heard it was sleep.
No, we, we got 10 inches.
Oh, that's good stuff.
That's good stuff.
I, I love snow because of boththe joy and calmness it brings
to me.
The past two days of snow we'vehad on the ground, I've been
able to come home from my twoeight hour shifts that I've
worked, get under, relax for abit, get dressed, take both of
(53:06):
my children out and watch themplay in the snow.
Speaker 2 (53:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (53:09):
But the other part that I love is I go to work at
three in the morning and it'sdark and I walk out to my truck
and it's snowing and it's quietand it's peaceful, and you feel
this overwhelming sense of ease,standing and the only thing you
can hear is the wind blowingpast you and your and your boots
(53:30):
crunching the snow under yourfeet.
It is a very calming andbeautiful thing that I've always
loved, both in the snow and inthe rain, but mainly right now
it's the snow, so I I really asmuch as headache is is caused.
I've enjoyed having this amountof snow around us for the past
two days.
Speaker 2 (53:50):
All right, man, we made it to the end of the show
and spoken about everything thatwe want to speak about.
Last thing I always ask on theshow after we've spoken about
what we want to speak about.
All I want to know now is howdo you feel?
Speaker 1 (54:02):
I feel good.
You know, anytime having aconversation with you is is
always a bonus to me.
Anytime I get to speak to oneof my truest and greatest
friends, you know, it brings, itbrings me back to a center.
Almost Like I was telling you,I was having a heck of a day
this past week.
This was my first four daysback since the holiday break,
which were also stressful, andwe had a lot to handle,
(54:24):
especially yesterday at work.
Yeah, state funeral is going on.
For those of you who may notknow, president Carter passed.
I'm at Joint Base Andrews.
We handle that.
He just flew in for the statefuneral.
So a lot going on.
But being able to handleeverything that I handle at work
and come home to not only mywife and kids, but to talk to a
true friend, is always a goodcenter point for me.
(54:44):
So being able to do it, whetherit's here on the podcast or on
a phone call, or even it's justthe text, it gives me that sense
of center that I'm alwayslooking for.
Yeah, feeling great, alwaysgood to, always good to talk to
you, my guy.
Amen, cheers to you.
I love you, man, she devilstill the end, hey she devils
Cheers to.
Speaker 2 (55:12):
I want to thank you for listening to the Black man
Talking Emotions podcast.
The opening quote credit goesto Plato and shout out to my guy
, ryan O'Fallon, for being onthe pod.
Ryan, you can follow him onInstagram at O'Fallon Ryan.
That's what it's all about.
Please subscribe to the podcast, share the podcast and give us
a good rating five stars, please, and thank you.
(55:33):
You can support the show byclicking the link at the bottom
of the episode description.
If you liked this episode, youshould check out our previous
episode that I did with anotherclose friend and former
roommates of Ryan and I titledNavigating Entertainment and
Politics in Los Angeles withMark Richards.
It's a great listen.
Check it out.
Follow me at D-O-M underscoreL-A-M-O-U-R on Instagram or at
(55:58):
DomLamorecom.
I'm Dom Lamore, much love.
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