BEE #128: Why You Aren't Losing Weight

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If you're struggling to shed those pounds despite doing "everything right," this episode is for you. Join Kristin as she delves into the three common roadblocks that may be hindering your weight loss journey.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• The importance of nurturing a healthy relationship with food and why labeling food as "good" or "bad" could be sabotaging your efforts.
• How negative self-talk can impact your eating habits and contribute to a vicious cycle of guilt, shame, and overeating.
• Why relying solely on food for joy can lead to emotional eating and what you can do to find fulfillment beyond the plate.

Kristin's insights will challenge the way you think about food, self-talk, and joy, providing you with actionable steps to break free from emotional eating and finally achieve your weight loss goals.

BEE #101: The Power of Positive Self-Talk For Emotional Eaters

Connect with me online:

1. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/breakthroughemotionaleating/
2. You Tube channel, Kristin Jones Coaching: https://www.youtube.com/@KristinJonesCoaching44

3. You Tube channel, Breakthrough Emotional Eating Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/@breakthroughpodcast-44
3 . Website: https://www.kristinjonescoaching.com

If you want to learn more about how to stop overeating at meals and lose weight easily, get my How To Stop Overeating At Meals Guide: https://go.kristinjonescoaching.com/stop-overeating

Needing more specific and direct support for your emotional eating and overeating? Check out my online course, Stop Dieting Start Feeling, and my personalized coaching program, Breakthrough To You.

If you found this episode helpful, don't forget to leave a review on the platform you used to listen and share it with your friends on your Instagram stories. Also, be sure to follow me o...

Episode Transcript

(00:04):
Do you want to lose weight butare tired of the restrictions
and deprivation that accompaniesa diet?
Does food provide you comfortwhen you are lonely, bored,
angry, or sad?
If so, you are in the rightplace.
My name is Kristen Jones, andI'm a life coach specializing in
emotional eating and weightloss, and I'm also a lifelong

(00:26):
emotional eater.
I want to provide you withinformation, motivation, and
support.
So you too can learn to manageyour emotion and thoughts and
develop a healthy relationshipwith food and yourself.
Welcome to the BreakthroughEmotional Eating Podcast.

(00:51):
Hi and welcome to theBreakthrough Emotional Eating
Podcast.
My name is Kristen Jones andthank you so much for joining me
for this week's episode.
Now I have so many formermembers and people that I know
who are trying to lose weightand there's so many questions
about I'm doing everythingright.

(01:12):
Why am I not losing weight?
In my coaching, I find thatthere are three really common
reasons why people don't, peoplearen't losing weight when they,
when in, in theory they'retrying and they're doing all the
right things.

(01:32):
And I was just doing some airquotes there, but really too
often times In traditional dietculture, we want to look at,
well, what's the food?
But how do we need to change ourfood?
What can we do differently?
How does this supposed to lookdifferently?
I should be cutting out carbs.
I should be adding this.
I should be drinking more water,all of those things.
And in reality, there are three.

(01:54):
reasons that would probably bethe result of why you're not
losing weight.
And I want to talk about thosethree reasons and kind of give
you a little bit of some thingsto think about when it comes to
why you feel like you're doingeverything right, but you're not
losing weight.
So the three things that we'regoing to look at today is one,

(02:15):
your relationship with food,two, how you are talking to
yourself, and three.
if food is the only joy in yourlife.
So let's start with number one.
So your relationship with foodprobably needs a little bit of
help.
And the reason why we have tolook at your relationship with

(02:37):
food is because if you have thatthought pattern of, I am I'm
either on or I'm off.
Food is either good or bad.
If you are continuing tocategorize food as good or bad,
then there's a whole lot of foodthat you are not allowing
yourself to eat.
And one of the things thatpeople have to realize is desire

(03:01):
Is created between our ears.
Diet desire is created when westart to think and give power to
certain foods.
And so we really have toallowing yourself having that
relationship with food, whereit's either good or bad.
You're either allowed to haveit, or you're not allowed to
have it.
One totally.
I mean, poor food, it's not foodanymore.

(03:23):
It's, it's a judgment.
It's a judgment about the typeof person you are, how virtuous
you are, or.
Just how much of a slacker youare and that's no way to go
through life It's just it lifeis not meant for us to
constantly be on trial For whatwe put into our bodies and who's

(03:44):
putting us on trial?
So that's the first thing is,is, is if you're judging food
and you're making it either goodor bad, we have to, we have to
really let go of that and justremember that food is food.
Now the second thing is thesecond way you know if your
relationship with food is, isnot healthy and it's preventing

(04:05):
you from, from losing weight, isThat you every time you eat
something that maybe Falls intothat not so good category if you
have that bad category and youeat any of that food And there's
guilt and shame and disgust withyourself That absolutely is

(04:25):
going to cause and is going toactivate your brain to start all
the negative self talk, which isthe next thing we're going to be
talking about, the negative selftalk.
And that just takes us down aspiral that will only result in
you trying to make yourself feelbetter because of all the
negative self talk and the guiltand the shame.

(04:45):
And that just perpetuates theWho cares?
Let's just eat it anyway.
I don't, I'm not happy as it is.
Let's just eat it anyway.
So it's really important to payattention to that guilt and
shame.
And again, I want you to thinkabout does this Does this, is
this something that happens inyour life?

(05:07):
And it's not, again, to makeanybody feel guilty.
It's just awareness.
Awareness and knowledge andinformation is the most
important thing that we can havewhen it comes to dealing with
emotional eating andunderstanding why we do things.
So that's the, that's, that'sthe next one.
The third thing is to, todetermine whether or not your
relationship with food needs aWhen you overeat, food becomes

(05:35):
the, food is the reason.
We're going to look at food.
We're going to shame food.
We're going to make food the badguy.
And then we're going to startover.
So it's twofold.
We're going to start overtomorrow.
And that just activates the, Ohmy gosh, I need to eat
everything I possibly can rightnow because tomorrow I'm getting
back on the food rules and I'mgoing to be good again tomorrow.

(05:58):
That just activates the overeatand the binge.
So we can, we just perpetuatewhat we just did if we did have
an overeat.
And it also creates that All ornothing thinking of again, food
becomes restricted.
It becomes, it goes back on thebad list and we don't get to
have any.
And again, that creates desire.

(06:19):
And so this, this vicious cycleis created when we don't have a
positive relationship with foodand we don't think of food as
just food.
It, it will absolutely result inconsistent and perpetual
overeating.
And.
And that is going to keep youexactly where you are.
The second reason that you maynot be losing weight is your, is

(06:42):
your self talk.
And if your self talk isanything like my self talk was,
it was negative and it wasn'tjust negative about food.
It was negative abouteverything.
I would get a flat tire.
I was a horrible person.
I wouldn't get invitedsomeplace.
I was an awful person.
It didn't matter that, thatthere were people going that,
that I didn't know and it wasn'tappropriate for me to go.

(07:02):
I was a horrible person.
It was all about me.
And all the negative self talkthat we create within ourselves,
if we are talking bad aboutourselves and we're putting
ourselves down for food orotherwise, we are just going to
need to feel better.
And what makes us feel better?
But food.

(07:22):
So whether it's, whether there'san overeat or not, whether
something bad has happened ornot, if we are consistently
berating ourselves, We aresetting ourselves up and putting
ourselves into that sabotagecycle of I talk bad about
myself, I eat.
I then guilt and shame myselfbecause I ate and then that
causes me to eat more.
And then I do that vicious cycleover and over and over.

(07:45):
So paying attention to how youtalk about, talk about yourself,
not only to yourself, but toothers as well is so very
important.
We have to pay attention to thatand we have to nip that and
really start paying attentionand start genuinely being kinder
to ourselves.
And then the last thing is iffood is the only joy in your

(08:06):
life, Then we got some problems.
There is nothing wrong withenjoying food.
I love food.
I love food.
I consider myself a foodie.
I have been to the FrenchLaundry.
I have done the 12 course meal.
It's amazing.
It's just, it's, it's all thethings.
It was so fabulous.
I love food.
But, I have learned that foodcannot and will not be the only

(08:31):
joy in my life.
Because that's where I get intotrouble.
And, and if you feel like foodis the only thing that brings
you comfort, and the only thingthat makes you feel not alone,
or isolated, or sad, or bored,if it's the only thing that's
the panacea for that, then youneed to start looking at, okay,

(08:53):
why?
feeling that way?
Where in my childhood did thatcome from?
That I only see joy in food.
And I only see that as being thething that is going to make me
feel better.
And then seek to really discoverwhat does bring me joy.
I'll be honest about two yearsago.
And I, this was part of, thiswas part of my recovery is what

(09:16):
brought me joy.
This is embarrassing y'all, butwhat brought me joy was Justin
Bieber and I decided that Iwanted to see him in concert He
came into concert in my area andI bought tickets spent a
ridiculous amount of money to gosee him Three seats from the
stage and it was worth everypenny of it because I was able
to Find there were other thingsthat I found joy And there were

(09:38):
other things that I was able tofocus on and and My work gives
me focus.
My work gives me joy.
I have found the other types ofjoy in my life, and I've been
able to channel that and realizethat food doesn't need and will
not ever be the only joy in mylife.
So if you feel that might beapplying to you, you need to
start really looking at, well,what does bring me joy?

(10:00):
What makes me happy?
And then incorporate more ofthat in your life.
So, these three things, I just,and this is going to be a quick
episode, but I really want youto think about, what are the
three things that are going to,what are these three things, are
these applying to your life?
Do you feel like, hmm, maybethose things are causing me to
unconsciously, subconsciouslyovereat?

(10:23):
And If you need Not be able tolose the weight that I want has
nothing to do with food.
It has to do with inside It's aninside job how I feel about
myself.
So think about those things.
Maybe do a little journaling andWe'll continue to unravel and
unfold these issues of yourrelationship with food your self
talk there are so many episodesand I will link an episode to

(10:44):
self talk in the show notes aswell as Is there joy in your
life?
And that's another episodecoming as well.
So thank you so much for joiningme this week.
And I will see you next weekwith another episode.
And I, again, appreciate youbeing here.
Take care.
Thank you for listening to thisweek's episode.

(11:05):
To take your first steps towardsnever dieting again, get my stop
dieting guide, go to www.
kristinjonescoaching.
com.
That's Kristin with an I N andlearn a sustainable way to lose
weight and develop a healthyrelationship with food.

(11:26):
I'll see you next episode.