Dating when you don't leave the house

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
I know I'm talking to, to whitewomen.

(00:03):
white.
Mm-hmm.
Women, you can just say whitewomen.
Are we white?
I didn't know I am Jamie.
And I'm Rebecca.
Welcome to the BurnoutCollective.
Hello.
Hello, hello, hello.
Welcome back.
We have Morgan Smith with ustoday.

(00:25):
Hey Morgan.
So glad to have her.
I'm excited.
thank you so much for joiningus.
This is, both exciting and nervewracking for me.
I have not been on a liveanything since 20, 20, 20 21.
It's been a while.
Hey, like we've done, we've hadpeople on the show that have

(00:45):
never done a podcast, so Oh,okay.
Yeah, yeah.
You're doing great.
Totally, totally good.
so Morgan was sick a coupleweeks ago when she was supposed
to come on.
I'm still, I'm almost out of it,but I'm still getting over being
sick and now Rebecca's sicktoday, so we're doing great.
Yeah.

(01:06):
Sorry in advance.
I do have the privacy flap if Ineed to blow my nose.
But stop, sniff, stop calling aflap.
I'm not,'cause it's a flap.
Ugh.
Privacy shutter.
Shutter is fine, but I likeflap.
Just you don't like flap?
You just like it because I hateit because it grosses me out.
See?
Yeah.
That's what I like picture,flaps.

(01:28):
But, I, when you said flap, I,that's not, it's fine.
Nevermind.
Yeah, it's fine.
Nevermind.
We're good.
We're good.
So we can, we can talk moreabout flaps later.
Later.
Sound quality on my end is notgonna be great.
Apologies in advance, but, weare still glad you're here.
so Thank you.
Me too.
I'll try to sniff off mic.
Hey, manic.
can I go, do y'all have a, doy'all have a run of show that

(01:50):
doesn't allow for like curves?
That doesn't allow for what?
Curves or.
Oh, no, no.
We can just throw some stuff in.
We can do whatever we want.
I have not, I know that y'allare gonna be, to some degree
interviewing me, but I have notinterviewed in a very, very long
time, probably since me andRebecca worked together.

(02:11):
Can I ask y'all a question aslike a starter?
Yeah, please do.
Please that.
Okay.
burnout collective, like when Ithink about burnout in general,
I think about like people whohelp me through burnout time.
And I was wondering for you twoboth like when your life best
curbs, like a crash out whenyou're burning out.

(02:32):
who in your life pulls you,pulls you out of the burnout,
crash out Rebecca.
Anything.
Maybe it's a thing, maybe it'snot a person.
I, I was gonna say, so like inthe middle of a crash out, like
when there's no one else around,it's the dogs.
So the dogs know like when myblood pressure is high, like I'm

(02:53):
upset and they'll all come overand lay on me.
yeah, so like I get like thatheavy pressure weight and that
is really helpful and justcoming down.
But if it's like on a biggerscale over days, it's like Janie
would be the one I call and justblah too.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I guess my cats too.

(03:13):
And also it's usually Rebecca,Rebecca's the one that like,
knows everything.
Knows everything.
Like I've been through andunderstands.
'cause I think also like luckilyor not, I don't know, we have
been doing the same thing in ourcareer.
So we also understand it likework-wise, like work burnout.

(03:34):
We kind of like understand.
A little more closely because wedo the same thing and we're in
like the same kind of likesector or have been.
so that's helpful.
But the cats also, my friends,like I do a lot of dissociating
where I'll like game, so I'lljust like game to dissociate.
And I have a lot of friends thatlike I game with and they like,
we just laugh and have fun andfool around and that kind of

(03:57):
just makes me forget, just makesme forget.
I love that you, what about youhave each other?
Yeah.
What about you?
Is it, is it more pet based orpeople based?
definitely more people based.
I would say my, my immediatego-to is like journaling.
I, I like to write.
Yeah.
So if I, if I'm starting tospiral, like I'll just start

(04:20):
like writing shit down.
but.
If it's at a critical level,like I need to talk to somebody,
it's my brother.
It's just me and him always hasbeen all of my life.
And, I don't really know how Isurvive in this life without
him.
I do suffer from, from panicattacks occasionally.
And so I know that when, if it'smiddle of the night, like if

(04:44):
it's early morning, if it'smiddle of the day he's at work,
like I can call and he will,he'll ground me either on the
phone or if he's I'm on my way,I'm in.
So yeah, definitely, definitelymy brother for me will just tell
me I know the things that I needto hear from someone and I can
repeat it to someone else, butlike mm-hmm.
Oh, tell me I'm okay.

(05:05):
Tell me I'm safe.
Like I can hear it back, but itdoesn't hit unless it's from
him.
Yeah.
So he says it.
Then I can be like.
You're okay.
Everything's fine.
And then I'll just, I'm stillcrashing out a little bit, but
not at the level that's likemassive.
That's a good older brother.
Like that's a, that's a reallysweet older brother.

(05:26):
That's awesome.
Learned.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's nice.
Okay.
Thanks for indulging.
No, I like, I love that.
I think that was really awesome.
You're the first person to dothat, so thank you.
Thank you for caring about usand us being burnt out.
that's great.
But I think too, that's why wedo this because we, and I think
we talked about this a littlebit with you Morgan, but we get

(05:48):
to have these conversationslike, I guess two on one, not
one-on-one, but like two on onewith a ton of really awesome
people.
And so far it's been badasswomen.
and that kind of helps us tobuild community and hearing
everybody's stories like I.
Everyone's burnt out indifferent ways, and sometimes
we're burnt out in multipleways.

(06:08):
But, just hearing everybody'sstories and like coming
together, I dunno, it makes mefeel a lot less alone and that's
like, why we do this, because wedon't want anyone to like, feel
so alone.
Like they can't get out.
so yeah.
Yeah.
I 100% agree.
I think, the less, the less thatwe talk about it, like the more
that people fit in it.

(06:29):
and I think it took me a whileto realize that certainly
working in HR and working in alike tech startup space, I don't
think like anybody iscomfortable saying, I am
uncomfortable here, or Right.
I feel tired here, or I, I don'twanna, or This is too much.
Yeah.
I, yeah, like too much is justtoo much for me.

(06:49):
And like you're potentially heldwith I.
Golden handcuffs or like thereare a lot of things that like
keep you in something.
So like I think the more thatpeople at minimum talk about it,
it's not gonna solve the problemin full, but it creates space
and opportunity for healing someof the like, critical issues

(07:13):
that lead to.
So I think, yeah, like theconversation that y'all are
starting is important.
when you just said that, what'sso interesting is all the tech
startups I've worked at havebeen headed up by men who either
had wives who took care of thekids at home or didn't have kids
and they were able to just, giveit a hundred percent and give it

(07:35):
their all because they had awife back home doing all this
stuff.
Yeah.
You brought up something reallycritical and I, I wanna take you
back to a place that we worktogether, Uhhuh.
With a, a leader, I'll just saya leader who, when we were both
there without children, and Iremember us both having some

(07:58):
sort of conversations with thisperson about parenthood and
about what it means to leave andgo to a retreat and like what
the planning looks like to evenbe able to do things like that.
hey, if you and your partner arethinking about having children,
I just want you to know likethings are gonna shift, your
priorities are gonna shift theway that you think about the way
that you build things for yourcompany are going to shift.

(08:19):
And, left that company maybe sixto eight months later and,
connected still with people thatworked there and found out that
that leader had a child about ayear after, was like, oops.
This is different.
Can't do this.
Yep.
In the same way that we used to.
And, that company is nowessentially dissolved.

(08:40):
couldn't Yeah.
Way.
it's very easy to burn out whenyou are a parent mm-hmm.
And trying to be a leader in acompany.
And if you are not familiar withthat, or at least trying to be
empathetic, try to understandwhat's happening around you, it
will crumble.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
I, yeah.

(09:00):
I, I don't have kids and I just,I don't understand, I don't
understand how parents do it.
I don't get it.
if you'll Yeah.
that's the same retreat went onwhere my child had been in the
hospital two weeks prior and Istill had to go, so Yep.
It was like mandatory.
Mm-hmm.

(09:21):
And I was very much don't.
Don't come, don't do that.
No, I know.
You were the only one.
I know.
Your manager was like, yes, hertoo.
Yeah.
Yeah.
so yeah.
Yeah, and it's, I say that inthat I don't think that there
should be like special privilegegiven to parents, but just like

(09:44):
the awareness in general ofpeople's burnout and what their
specific situations are like.
That's a managerial response.
It's just empathy.
Yes.
It's literally just being anempathetic manager and to be a
part of management.
Yeah.
You know how to do that at baselevel, understand your people
and where they're at and whatthey're going through, and then
help them navigate and makedecisions mm-hmm.

(10:06):
That are right for them.
You should be a manager.
Mm-hmm.
No, you shouldn't hang it.
I'm always talking about howlike we, we need management
training.
'cause people are becomingmanagers that shouldn't be
fucking managers.
People are becoming managersthat like it.
Maybe it seems like theyshouldn't be a manager, but it's
just that they were just throwninto this role and they just

(10:26):
they don't know what they'redoing.
And I think everybody canbenefit.
Yeah.
I think everybody can benefit.
How many companies have you beenat where they've done like
management training, likelegitimately?
legitimately, so first of all,legitimate first time manager
training that is dedicated topeople management.
Mm-hmm.
I've been at one company andI've been in the HR people space

(10:48):
for 10 years.
Yeah.
One company that has, that'sbonkers to me.
That's stupid.
Two people management.
I've been at two companies maybethat had if you want it.
There's an outsourcedopportunity for you to grab this
up as part of your learning anddevelopment, but it's not forced

(11:10):
upon you.
It's not anything that you like.
It's mandatory you have to do.
Yeah.
and then at one company where Ihad the beautiful opportunity to
build things from scratch, Icreated a first time manager,
training that was really foundedon, as you come in to people

(11:30):
management, understanding yourteam.
That was really all there wasto, it had nothing to do with
you, like there are, delegationand like some of that stuff
that's like secondary, but like,how do you just come in and
understand who you're workingwith?
How do they work?
How do they like to communicate?
How do they like feedback?
Like all those like baselinethings.
Here's how to be a human beinglike.

(11:53):
To some degree that we like tojust skip over and just assume
that everyone's on the samepage.
But the reality is everyone's onthe same page.
And the way that I found thatout was like actually sharing
that about myself with people.
So like when I would come in asan HR leader or an HR business
partner, I would share who I am.
This is how I work.

(12:14):
These are my basic hours.
I have two kids and sometimesunexpectedly I'm gonna call out,
here's how I like to receivefeedback.
I cuss occasionally.
I'm gonna share all that.
All of that upfront with you.
Mm-hmm.
And then people will be like,damn, like that really?
That set the tone.
Yeah.
I know how to work with you now.
Giving that to people up frontallowed them to give it back to

(12:38):
me.
It gave them authority andpermission to give it back to
me.
And they were like, I would loveto do this in my teams.
And so creating that space forthat to to be an option.
Yeah.
Nice.
I love to share, Hey, this ishow I manage.
Or with my manager for example,Hey, this is how I like to be
managed.

(12:59):
This is how to best manage me.
And it's like sometimes, likemost people don't do that.
Most people don't share that.
But I think it's reallyimportant.
And so I also ask, if I getdirect reports, I say like, how
do you prefer to be managed?
How do you prefer tocommunicate?
what's your style?
And because I wanna cater tothat as well, if it's, if I'm, I
am managing different people,like an editor and an SEO person

(13:21):
and like a writer, maybe thewriter prefers to be
communicated to differentlybecause they're so like heads
down focused on getting liketheir writing done that they
won't see Slack.
So it's oh, make sure you at meor make sure, send me an email
because I check my email like onmy little, like Pomodoro breaks
or whatever.
but I think that's so important.

(13:42):
Yeah.
Like that foundational work isreally key to setting the tone
for an employee's overallsuccess.
And yeah, I found that I'mbiased like everyone else, and
I, I do have a heart for blackwomen specifically.
and I found that as an HRbusiness partner, certainly

(14:03):
leading product focus teams, solike sales teams that have black
women on them, and that's very,very rare.
I try to figure out like whattheir things are and like share
that with their leaders.
It's like mm-hmm.
If you, if you wanna keep, youwanna do right by them.
Yeah.
Here's how they work and here'show you can get to how they work

(14:27):
even more deeply.
And it's just Trying to coachpeople to be able to just be
more human and empathetic towhat people are experiencing and
like their, their differences.
the neuro spicy folks like tryto pull all of those things out
early on and you don't have tobe six months in wondering why

(14:47):
someone is pulling back.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They seem like they're drained.
Why?
They seem like they're notshowing up the way that you
expected when you were in theinterview process with them, or
you've fucking sucked them dryand here's how you could have
changed that.
So like showing up early on inthose ways is like super

(15:08):
helpful.
Yeah.
Knowing how to communicate is soimportant because otherwise you
end up making the engineeringdirector cry at a offer, at a
retreat.
'cause you answered his questionthe way that you thought he
wanted to answered.
yeah.
All.
No, this, this is like a teenybit off topic, but you said like
in catering to like the neurospicy folks and we're obviously

(15:30):
neurodivergent, so we talk aboutthat a lot.
So I love that you said that,but I was just thinking, I went
and got a haircut like a fewweeks ago and I'm always late.
I am late for everything.
I have a DHD, I have timeblindness.
I'm late for everything.
I know it pisses off a lot ofpeople who, who love me.
and even when I try my best, butanyway, so I'm always late for

(15:52):
my hair appointment and I don'tlike that because I'm like,
that's so fucking rude.
this is like her time.
don't do that.
And I love my hairstylist.
She's awesome.
Shout out Ashley, I love you.
but, I like.
Dissolve.
I like resolved to get up earlyand it was like a morning
appointment.
So I got up super early, whichis not like me.
So like I could get there ontime.
And even though I got up like anhour and a half before I had to

(16:14):
be there, before I had to leave,I still was gonna end up being a
little bit late.
So I texted her to say Hey, I'mso sorry, I really tried, but
I'm not gonna be there until 10,15 after.
And she was like, Jamie.
And then she called meimmediately and she's okay.
She's Hey, let's do our consultnow over the phone so that when
you get here and sit down, likewe can do that.
And I was like, oh my God.
It's like you're catering to mebeing neurodivergent.

(16:38):
That's so sweet.
Thank you.
And like she shouldn't have todo that, but I thought that was
like really sweet and that waslike also a really nice way to I
don't know, go about it.
Yeah.
It was like honor who you are asa person and to some degree
like.
Just say I get it.
you don't have to, you don'thave to feel bad about this.
Yeah.
We can make, we can make theseadjustments and everything still

(17:00):
be okay.
Yeah.
Like I feel like sometimesspecifically on a management
piece, people feel like if wemake these adjustments then like
to change the whole way I doeverything.
It's no, actually don't, likeyou can make an adjustment for
something specific.

(17:20):
Mm-hmm.
Just be for that somethingspecific and it's for that
person.
It doesn't, as long, as, long asit's not like iTMB balancing
something, like we're not makingsomething inequitable.
Why not?
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
So like, why not honor thatperson and who they are and say
they see you, they understandwhat's difficult for you in this

(17:44):
realm, and I'm gonna shift.
Mm-hmm.
Because of that and That's alovely way to, to honor someone
as a human being.
Yeah.
I would fire you as a client.
I would fire you if you like.
The third time you did that tome, I would fire your ass so
hard.
Yeah.
She really should fire me.
I like, do try though.
'cause I love her so much.
I've been going to her for closeto a decade.

(18:07):
she's like the only person.
I hope you tip her.
Amazing.
Oh, I I hope you tip her.
I do.
Okay, good.
Now she's no, I'm just kidding.
I think I do, I think I do agood job.
she's the greatest.
But it seems like she'slegitimately made an adjustment
for you.
Mm-hmm.
And she, she just gets it.
Yeah.
It's almost like when you book,she's probably already expecting

(18:30):
to some degree.
She always says she's gonnachange the time and just tell me
a different time.
Everybody's, and I was like, youjust should.
She's already.
She's already built it in.
Yeah.
And that's, that's a kind,that's just being a, a great
human, in my opinion.
Yeah.

(18:50):
Alyssa in chat said littleRebecca, you meant you were
firing Jamie.
Yes, of course.
That's what she meant.
meeting people where they are isa skill and hopely can be the
standard.
she said, I hear a lot of trustextended in that approach.
She was talking about yourapproach, Morgan.
which can feel so vulnerable atwork, but it's also great, but
it's also to create a spacewhere people get to bring their

(19:11):
full self to work.
that's awesome.
Yeah.
I agree.
Yeah.
I love that.
I, I, I'll also just say, Iappreciate that as a, as a
thought.
I'll also just say, because I'mhearing this is what we're
talking about, I just also don'tbelieve in bringing your full
self to work ever.
Oh, no.
Mm-hmm.
I've done that once.

(19:31):
It burned me greatly.
Yeah.
so full self in waves is the waythat I would probably place it.
I, I don't feel that I'minauthentic at work, like I'm my
authentic self.
I also feel like I am myauthentic self with boundaries

(19:54):
in boundaries.
I have deep understanding of whoI am being my authentic self
with.
And sometimes that means I'mgonna give it to you right here
and I'm gonna pull it back.
Mm-hmm.
I'm gonna give it to you righthere and pull, I'm gonna pull it
back.
It's not just like this constantfree flow of Morgan being her

(20:15):
authentic self.
Yeah.
I think that that can burn you.
And I would like to, I'm gonnacall it out in the space.
I know I'm talking to, toresenting white women.
white.
Mm-hmm.
Women, you can just say whitewomen.
Are we white?
I didn't know Morgan White.
Listen, you could be presentingwhite and, and not be white.

(20:39):
Don't be.
Look at my dad.
I I will show you a picture ofmy dad.
I don't have no, look at mydad's just, I have a picture of
him nearby.
if it weren't for his hair, Iforgot where I was going for a
second.
Bringing your true self, butalso your boundaried self to
work basically.
Yeah.
Just like hitting pause onshowing everything specifically

(21:02):
for minorities, specifically forminority women.
Mm-hmm.
because sometimes that can holdyou back.
and I did find specifically inthe tech startup space, but the
more that I showed, the more Igot knocked back.

(21:23):
So I learned to be meek.
I learned to be quiet in somespaces just to elevate and then
I Elevated and elevation,elevation in title, status,
salary.
Yeah.
And the more burnt out I got.
If we're talking about burnout,the more I got up here, the more
burnout hit and I just gotknocked back even more.

(21:45):
So I would say, I think the ideaof being your authentic self in
the workplace is, man, I wish itcould be.
Yeah.
Oh, no, no, no.
I just I don't think that we'reanywhere close to it.
No, I don't think we're close.
No.
Which is unfortunate.
Very unfortunate.
It is.

(22:06):
I would like to be there too.
I agree with Morgan.
Like I would, I would love that.
But that's not, unfortunately,it's not gonna happen.
Yeah, no, I am, I'm good withnot showing up at a hundred
percent.
It's, it never ends.
I don't know.
Day one when I met you, I feellike you were very 100% with me.
I guess maybe a little heldback, but yeah, I just, it never

(22:30):
ends well, and then you have tooverexplain and then you already
set a tone and it's just, yeah,with boundaries, boundaries are
good.
I don't know.
I feel like even when you are,like, even when you are super
open, it doesn't, I feel like Iremember your interview,
Rebecca, at the place that weworked together, and I remember

(22:52):
to some degree in, maybe not thefirst interview, but like
interview two being like likenonchalantly.
I, I, I was like, I was openyeah, I'm not happy here, but
Here are the good things andhere are the bad things and and
then you're just like bringingpeople into the sub to some
degree because most of us,whether it's bad or good mm-hmm.
People can be their authenticselves to you and whether it's

(23:12):
bad or good, they'll be like, ifit fits what I need in that
moment, I'm gonna do.
Yeah.
And I think for you in thatmoment, it was like child in the
family and let's do it.
It was like no matter what Isaid, it wouldn't have mattered.
You can be fully authentic andlike still bring people into the
bullshit.
That part really sucked for meas a human.

(23:34):
I think that's where my liketech startup honestly like
started was with you, where Iwas like, I just brought this
woman into trash.
Listen, I can't forget myself.
Hey, there's something to besaid about the honesty though, I
have to say.
Like that alone.
So at the retreat, at theretreat, like the, whatever he

(23:57):
was director of Engineering waslike, all right guys, we're
gonna think bid and brainstorm.
Wow.
How do we make the engineeringteam more diverse?
And my answer was, stop hiringall these white guys.
'cause they had just hired likethree white guys in a row.
And I made him cry.
Why?
He And he ran and cried, cry.
'cause he's a big pussy baby.
I don't know.

(24:17):
He ran and tackles old and I wasin the, I was in the hiring
process for him.
He, I, he, I think that he knewRebecca.
I think that he knew he was oneof three.
That's our Rebecca, white male,Asian woman.
Asian male, yeah.

(24:39):
And he won.
Yeah.
Because he was like, I shouldn'teven be.
You shouldn't have.
But yeah, that's, that's justthe kind of bullshit that it
was, it was like performative.
Yeah.
They didn't really mean it, butall the smart people who I know
aren't, some of'em are there,most of'em left, which is good.

(25:01):
I'm trying to think.
so act, so what I wanted to tackon, like the showing up to your,
as yourself.
So the other thing that'shappened is, oh, actually
someone that we know showed upas their self and then asked for
a DA accommodations for that andthen did not get them.

(25:22):
Which, or it was just like thecompany was acting like it was,
that that was after, was it not?
No, it was after.
Yeah, it was after.
It was after.
but it's just so then it's okay,well now, now I've, now I've.
Expose myself now.
I put myself out there and askfor accommodations and now they
know this about me and it's youcan't, you can't win.
Even though legally they have togive it.

(25:44):
Now you kind of like put atarget on your back and exposed
yourself and it's just mm-hmm.
I'm still job searching now,Morgan.
Yeah.
And that's what like Rebecca waslike, don't put that you have a
disability.
Don't put that you have a DHD ordepression.
I never do.
Let me be very clear about theway that I fill out applications
and I hate it.

(26:05):
I struggle with it.
Tell lies.
I have a very American name.
It is white potentially, andunisex.
My name is my name without mypreviously married name is
Morgan Smith.
Morgan could be male or female.
Smith, God knows anything.

(26:25):
So when you see an application,you truly, yeah, do not know.
And so I.
Live in that like boundary, likeI lean Yeah.
I hate to say that.
I lean into that and then when Ifill out the rest of the
application, what is your racetwo or more is what I tend to

(26:45):
fill out.
That's good news.
It could be, it's none theirbusiness.
Let's be real.
If we're talking slavery, therealistic answer is two or more.
Mm-hmm.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
That everyone to interpret ontheir own.
the only thing that I answerhonestly is am, am I a veteran
or not?
Mm-hmm.

(27:06):
Which is No, everything elsey'all figure it out.
I hate that.
'cause I'm such like.
To a fault.
I feel like I'm a very, honestperson, so I struggle with that.
But Rebecca was like, no, youcan't put that.
Especially now with the newadministration, don't put, you
know that you have a disability.
And so I'm not now, but everytime I still am like, ugh, I

(27:28):
hate it.
I know.
It's, it is a moral, it's amoral conflict for me as well.
I'm not going to lie.
It's a moral conflict for mewhen I do it.
But also, I gotta get, I, Igotta find a way to be seen.
And I, if I fill it out,honestly, the likelihood of me
not being seen is higher.

(27:49):
Mm-hmm.
And so I just try to, I try togive myself an additional
chance, like that's the reality.
Have you seen that they'vestarted asking for video, like
clips or just just so networkand if anyone, if any company is
asking for that, for me.
Oh, they, they've been doingthis for a while though.
They've been doing this for awhile.

(28:10):
my brother specifically, whoworks in, he is an account
executive or a senior accountexecutive.
Sometimes he'll be applying forsales roles and they'll, they
will ask for a videointroduction or what, and I'm
like, don't do it.
Yeah.
Don't do it.
that is so invasive.
It is 100% a way to bias youout.

(28:33):
Yeah.
To introduce tons of bias.
Yeah.
Abso, like if, if a company isasking for that, it's not the
company free.
I saw a freelance writer gigthat they were like, oh, and
also please include a two minuteintro video about yourself.
And I was like, what does videohave to do with writing?
This isn't even a full-time job.
Mm-hmm.
come on.

(28:53):
No.
And I think that you, I'm not, Idon't know, I'm not.
Conspiracy, but I think thatthey like use like AI stuff too.
Like just put yourself into abank on videos and this is what
you speak and this is the waypeople present and like they use
for other stuff.
Thank no, I I You're totally ahundred percent correct on that

(29:15):
one.
Yeah, no, I'm not doing any ofthat.
And either they hire me or theydon't hire me and I'm not
bending over backwards.
Yeah, that's just, it's like the1950s when they wanted like
secretaries to submit their headshots.
It's stupid.
But then it's been six monthsand you still don't have a job.
That's the problem I'm runninginto.
Yeah.

(29:36):
You just start sending headshots.
Yeah.
See what happens.
Cut.
Let's see.
Tell us how it turns thingsaround.
Yeah.
You gotta make my intro videowith the eagle, Rebecca.
That's true.
When you feel better.
When you feel better.
Yeah.
No, it's, it's crazy.
So you are, so you are currentlyexploring other options and you,

(30:02):
you left your burnout situationunemployed.
Yes.
That's very nice of you.
I didn't wanna just be like,that's okay.
Yes.
I, unemployed, happilyunemployed.
I, I decided that what I wasdoing was no longer serving me.

(30:26):
I used to feel really good aboutHR work.
I used to feel excited aboutwhat it brought me.
I used to feel thrilled byconnecting with people, even in
the tech startup space.
But I have not felt that way forseveral years.
And I feel like I did have alittle bit of golden handcuffs.

(30:47):
if you're making, you are makingsix figures plus.
Hey, like you're taking care ofyour family.
Like you, you can make it, youfeel good.
And it was the only thingholding me, like there was,
there was literally nothing elseholding me to the job.
And I had to like, put it onpaper like, what?
What's keeping you here?
And yeah, I decided that theonly thing really keeping me was

(31:13):
the idea of making a difference,not that I actually was the idea
of it and the money.
Yeah.
And so I had to choose can Imake the idea a reality, the
idea of making a difference.
I make that a reality somewhereelse.
Make the money somewhere else.

(31:34):
Yeah.
Both of those remain to be seen.
It's only been two weeks, I, Idecided to leave what was
draining my soul behind.
Yeah.
What do you, how does it feelevery day to get up?
What are you feeling?

(31:54):
Oh, you're trying to make mecry.
Oh, I'm sorry.
No, I'm sorry.
I just meant I was hoping theanswer was like, I'm good and I
sleep in.
I didn't mean make you cry, I'msorry.
Yeah.
No, I don't, I don't sleep in atall.
Sleep.
Sleeping in would be reallylovely.
I think I did take like maybethree or four days where I was
like, I think the sleep in wasjust like burn the day out.

(32:16):
So you don't feel hyper anxiousabout what's next.
Yeah.
To some degree it was just like,sure, I did this thing and I
really don't have.
So let me go to sleep.
Yeah.
And I probably, I probably, inall honesty, I probably needed
the sleep too.
So like there was, there wasthat part as well, but like I

(32:36):
just, in order to not thinkabout what was next, I wake up
every day.
I keep it 100 like anxious.
Yeah.
I'm a single mom with two kids,single.
I have a mortgage, I have thebills, I have things to take
care of.
Mm-hmm.
Keep these string lights on.

(32:56):
and beyond a couple months, Idunno how I'm gonna do in full.
I don't really know how I'mgoing to do that.
And so that sucks.
But I'm also really confident inwhat I bring to the table.
I've done it before.
Yes.
I a hundred percent created.
Business from scratch.
And so that's what I plan to do.

(33:17):
there are so many people lookingfor work right now, and with my
background, I know that I canhelp people Yes.
Get to work.
Even if I am not doing it formyself, I can help people get to
work.
So that's the service that I, Iplan to, to boast.
But yeah, like I, I wake upevery day a little bit anxious,

(33:37):
but also like I do feel reallyfree.
I wanna add that on top of it.
Do you feel like empowered?
Yeah.
there's a difference betweenfeeling burnt out, anxious,
mm-hmm.
And feeling like unknown,excited, anxious.
Mm-hmm.
Those are two totally differentthings.
Oh yeah.
And so I was feeling burnt out,anxious, I don't wanna do this

(34:01):
anymore.
I don't know where to go.
I don't know what I'm doing, butI know that I'm miserable and
now I'm feeling like I.
I'm anxious, but like theopportunity is there and if I
capitalize on it, if I wake,like I, I'm waking up early
because like I feel the, feelthe grind, like I feel excited

(34:22):
by the grind.
A little bit like Rebecca, likeI'm doing like TikTok and
there's some social mediacontent, like push for all, like
the creative juices and thingsare flowing.
So like I'm not waking up earlybecause I don't anything.
It's just I don't know, but Ihave this inkling of a box of
possibility.

(34:43):
I just wanna wake up early totap into it.
that's right now.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's exciting.
It's for now, I hope it remainsexciting.
Like I, I, I do have the, likethe pressure, there's pressure
on Making what you think canwork actually work?

(35:05):
Oh, yeah.
Actually come to fruition.
I'm not, I'm not a hundredpercent sure that it will
happen.
I do have my fallbacks for sure.
I'm gonna start applying to shitjust in case.
But like my hope is that I canjust ride this wave that is me.
I have to tap back into thatlittle box that like really

(35:26):
didn't serve me.
Yeah, yeah.
You're putting your faith backinto your, yeah.
Your faith is going back intoyourself instead of some douche
bag at the top of a company.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Trying to just pour it all thatlike different type of, when you
start watching like the big dogsof these, like what are

(35:47):
relatively actually smallcompanies, we're not talking
Fortune 500, where like you'relike, like we're just talking
like small companies like actThey're so above you and it's
you know that this can bestripped from you by any moment.
you know that, you know that.
Hold on.
Hello?
Hi.
Hey.

(36:08):
It's fine.
We can hear you.
Can you hear?
Yeah, we can hear you just fine.
Yeah.
Okay, then we're just gonna doit without headphones.
Okay.
Does it track audio at all?
Okay.
No.
yeah.
Letting those like big dogs atthe top.
pretend like I'm so above you.
It's like we're the ones holdingthis shit together.

(36:29):
oh yeah.
You who's doing the work?
We're doing the work.
yeah.
Yeah.
That's, Yeah, that's, and I, oneof the things I said to you is
if you were somebody else whowasn't as smart or fucking
talented as you, I'd be like,but you're one of the rare
people I know who I can seeactually doing this because of
just how good you are.
So I'm crossing my fingers foryou.

(36:50):
I think it's amazing.
I haven't even, I will say thatI did reach out to Rebecca like
a week into my, I quit and I am,and I was like, I don't know
what I'm doing.
I'm scared.
I feel like this is a bigmistake.
And I think everybody has thatmoment and you just need a
friend to be like, you're right.
This is gonna be okay.

(37:11):
Yeah, you're gonna be okay.
Which I needed, and it, itcatapulted me.
I feel okay.
I'm honest.
Like I was honest.
If you were a stupid friend, Iwould tell you don't do this.
But you're not a stupid friend.
if anyone deserves to be incharge of their own company,
you're one of the very fewpeople I know.
So when are we starting our owncompany, ladies?
Next week or, yeah, Monday.

(37:32):
I just take the weekend atleast.
Morgan's gonna start her ownpodcast and oh.
Yes.
Yes.
It'll be called the Y Men.
Should we get into it?
Should we get into it?
Yeah.
I would love Y Men.
I would love to Rebecca as this.
I would love to.
Let's get to it.
Listen, I've been married since2009, so it's been a while for

(37:54):
me, so I just love to, I wasmarried in 2008, got divorced
and what year is it?
25.
I got divorced in 22.
I left him in 2022.
The divorce took much longer,but yeah.
Oh, that's sweet.

(38:15):
Yeah.
Let's talk about it.
What do we, what do we wannaknow?
Listen, I.
So full disclosure, I feel likeyou, if you're okay with this,
one of the things that I thoughtwas interesting was just like,
you'd be like, oh, can youbelieve the shit I'm going
through?
When you started online datingand it was horrific and I was
like, oh my God.
Having to wade through the trashpile online dating burnout is

(38:36):
something that we had neverconsidered before talking to
Morgan and then yeah, I don'teven know how to start this.
So let's just give somebackstory.
Right?
Yeah.
I met my ex-husband when I was18 years old, worked at a sprint
call center together.
So I'm from across the room andI was like, that's the one, an

(39:00):
idiot married him.
Three years later when I was 21,he went to war.
He cheated.
He did all the things.
I stayed, I was a fool.
Okay.
We had two kids.
I have not dated anyone since Iwas 18 years old.
Let's talk about what was stilllive when I was 18.
MySpace was still live baby.

(39:21):
It was still live and active.
Your frontal lobe wasn't evenfully developed.
Yeah.
I don't even know how, like whenI talk about this, I get tingly
because I'm like, I just wannatell all the 18 to 20 ones we
snap the snap phones.
There was no, there was nonothing.
It was just phone.
It's a flip phone.
Who says snap?
Phone day?

(39:41):
Says snap phone.
Okay.
Phone What?
Flip phone.
I just wanna be clear.
I didn't have a snap phone or aflip phone.
I had a sidekick.
Ooh.
So anybody in the chat who'sthere, I, we flip it up and it
twists.
It was a very fancy at the time.
Anyway, I met this man.
Dated him for all of a week andwas like, mom, I'm gonna marry

(40:03):
this man.
He's so fine.
I love him so much.
Married his ass when I was 21.
You did not dated from 21 to 32,not dated.
So I leave this man and I'mlike, now it's time.
We're gonna get back out there.

(40:24):
Mind you, when women leave, ittakes a long while.
So when, by the time I left, Iwas ready to date.
We're being honest, I had beenclocked out for Yeah.
Some significant period of time.
So I'm like, I good to go.
When you get on Bumble andTinder and, I don't even know
what the other ones are called.
There's Facebook dating.

(40:45):
What?
There's there's Facebook datingthat's for Republicans.
Someone's aunt.
Someone's aunt, and someone'suncle found their love there.
One, I, there's one, I don'tknow if someone else who's
watching them, but there's onethat starts with an H that I was
on, I can't remember Hinge.
Sorry.
Oh, hinge Coffee.
Meet Bagel.

(41:06):
Yeah.
So all the things, right?
I'm doing all of them at once.
Mm-hmm.
So fucking exhausting.
You gotta keep up with chatsfrom here, there, everywhere.
And it's I'm not that cute.
I know I'm cute.
Oh, you are?
I'm there.
Listen, I know that I'm very,I'm cute, but like for this

(41:26):
amount of attention, it's likey'all are just like clicking
everywhere.
And so you respond to the onesthat you're interested in just
based off of profile and photo,and you gotta wait for them to
respond.
You're like, why didn't theyrespond?
You're like questioning your,like you clicked on me most.
Yeah.
If you have anxiety, it's evenworse because then you're like,

(41:49):
what does that mean?
Yeah.
You're like spiraling.
Like, why am I not good enoughfor you to at least like text me
back?
You're like, this guy's not evenhot.
You're not on Bumble.
I don't know if it's that waynow, but on Bumble previously,
the women had to reach outfirst.
Mm-hmm.
So you are doing the outreachand you have to wait for them to

(42:09):
reach back.
Yeah.
Telling a woman self esteem,because the banner just like
click, click clicking, givingthumbs up to everyone just to
see what they get, and then youmessage the one that you're
interested in and they nevermessage you back and you're just
like.
Am I ugly?
Why are you here men?
Fuck microwaved fruit.
I'm just gonna say that men fuckmicrowave fruit.

(42:30):
Like the fact that they have theballs not to respond.
I know that now insane to me.
I know that now.
Insane.
But then it was totallydifferent because I was used to
meeting men out in the wild.
Mm-hmm.
Where they look at you, it's sowild.
And they're like, I'm up to you.
And they're like, oh my God.
you're so pretty.
what?
And in this scenario I was like,I'm a, I'm a troll.
I'm a troll doll.

(42:51):
That's why they're notcommunicating with me.
And I had to learn.
It is so easy to get burnt outon online dating because these
men.
To a detective too, by the way.
You turned into a detective,which is like an like an FBI
level agent detective, like youwere pouring over is this house

(43:12):
occupied by, look at this, lookat this picture.
And then I saw this picture onthe, in, on the inch of webs and
you were, I 100% found a manthat, like I, we had been going
back and forth via chat forthree days.
I dunno, something felt offabout the timing of his
communication.

(43:33):
So I screenshot like his mainpicture into the Google search,
found him on Facebook.
The man had a whole family, hada whole fucking family.
And it's like, why are, why arewe doing?
And it's I don't wanna do thatanymore.
Why are we doing that?
You're disgusting.
My God.

(43:54):
And I never, and this is I 100,burnout, 100% burnt out online
dating because it's not for me.
Because the way that, like mybrain is set up, I'm gonna find
out about you.
I'm a classic Virgo.
You cannot lie to my face andthink, of course, she's a Virgo.
No.
Yeah, the FBI agent skills.

(44:16):
I know your name, I know yourmother's name.
I know your, I'll pay for somedetective work too.
Like you want me to get abackground check?
Maybe$15.
Got it.
Boom.
What's the other thing?
And again, I haven't been outthere for a while, but the sa I
would just be anxious, will Iget murdered?
Like safety aspect of it.

(44:38):
Yeah.
Yeah.
That would make me reallynervous a lot.
Which is interesting though,because we really didn't care
about the safety aspect when wewere meeting men out in the bars
and we were like, oh, it's afrontal lobe, Morgan.
It was not formal.
You wanna go home?
Sure.
No.
You're making making ramentonight?
Yeah.
I'd love to.
Yes.
Ram Cup noodle.
Yes.
Let's do it.
Like we didn't, let's throw somefrozen veggies in there.

(45:01):
Great.
You're yeah.
You're special.
Yeah.
We didn't give a shit, but no,I, I do worry about getting
murdered often.
Mm-hmm.
Often, which is again, anotherreason to just not.
But dating burnout is, isfucking real.
Also, if you want to just steeryourself away from dating

(45:24):
online, go on Reddit and justlook up Bumble.
All of the horror stories willjust fold into you.
My God.
And you'll realize that it'sjust, it's, it's a landmine out
there and there's no point injoining into what's happening.
I, I tried to online date and I,like you hadn't dated in like a

(45:47):
decade.
And I was in my thirties andthis was actually like pretty
recently, like within the lastfew years.
And I somehow landed on OkCupidand I love that one.
I signed up, okay.
I wrote this killer bio.
I wrote a killer bio.
Rebecca helped me with it.

(46:07):
And it was hilarious though.
'cause after Rebecca read it,she was like, you wrote this for
women.
She's you wanna date women?
I'm Pan.
So she's yeah.
She was like, you really wrote,wrote this for women?
And I'm like, yeah, whoever, SoI do it, and then they're like,
Ooh, sorry, this phone numberalready had an account.
And I was like, I've never hadan account.

(46:29):
And I literally had to emailthem kind of like pleading oh
no, please, can I please goonline dating?
And then I was like, what thefuck am I doing?
And it was basically just Nope,you can't, because someone used
my number or someone who, whenthey had my number once used it.
And so I just was rejected.
And I was like, that's it.
I'm done.
That's it.

(46:50):
Yeah.
I really, I really, when I wannadate again, I don't know what
the fuck I'm gonna do because Ican go outside my house.
And I'm not interested ingetting burnt out again.
Yeah.
No.
This is why.
But so that's why I'm just like,I would just get another dog.
I think I, I don't, it'sRebecca, you, you remember my

(47:12):
like.
End of relationship burnout.
Crap.
Yeah.
I voice noted that shit for youwhere I was like, motherfucker,
open your phone.
What's going on?
Like I sent it to Rebecca andshe was like, bitch, he's lying.
He is lying.

(47:33):
Lying Marina.
We're fine.
We're trying not to get murderedwhile online dating.
Yeah, that's the other thing.
The, the audacity of the men outthere, from what I've heard, the
lying and the sneakiness isjust, yeah, it's audacity.
Given like the caliber incomparison and I don't wanna be

(47:54):
rude.
Be rude.
It's fine.
They're trash.
It's okay.
Hey words, but like me versusyou, like the way that you're
lying right now says that likeyou're set up above me.
No, no, baby.
Have you considered outside thecountry?
Have you considered British orFrench?

(48:16):
Have you considered sugar daddy?
Oh, that I, that I'm moreconsidering that I'm more on
that wavelength, that feels moremy, I wanna be able to like,
have the fruits and benefits.
Mm-hmm.
I don't wanna waste my time withthe idea that we could be in
love and have a life, Becausewhy would we do that to us?

(48:38):
I don't wanna waste my time on,on love, on Love.
What is, I think that's the nameof the podcast.
Don't wanna Waste my time onlove.
Obviously a lover girl.
I want it, but I'm also awarethat it's very, for me, yeah.
Because I, I just hate the wayother people do it.

(48:59):
Love.
yeah.
Oh, I just hate the way otherpeople do.
Go on.
I hate the way other peoplelove.
Okay.
Not please elaborate.
I love, like all of my friends,I love the way that they love,
like Rebecca, she'll check up onme occasionally and check out if
leave me alone, I'll bebothered.
She will google fu anymotherfucker.

(49:20):
You need her to Google Fu andshe is if I tell her like a
motherfucker's messing with me,she'd be like, riding that Dawn,
we're ready to, she's I hopehe's ready to get like all these
spam emails.
Like she's let me sign him up.
Very up.
Very much that, but I, I don'tfeel that in like romantic
relationships.
I'm just like, you're not,you're not for me the way that I

(49:44):
am for you.
Because I like, I'm very much alover girl.
Like I am like, oh, I did thatand that's very aggressive.
Maybe that's my prop.
Have you considered someone 20years older?
Yes.
This is therapy.
I, I, okay.
Relax, relax.
No, I'm serious.
I'm, I'm serious.
20 years older.

(50:04):
They have their kids.
My dad just married a womanthat's 20 years younger.
I get it.
I have a infant.
Sibling.
It's fine.
No, I have not considered thatrecently, but maybe I will.
Maybe I will.
They're indoor dogs.
They're indoor.
They're no longer wolves.
They become indoor dogs.

(50:26):
And you hear that, Rob?
It's much indoor dogs.
Wow.
Mm-hmm.
He goes to the dentist andeverything.
Indoor dog.
Was it, do we, should we hearfrom them?
The indoor dog is streaming fromthe other room.
God, he knows how to use acomputer.
That's amazing.
Wow.
God, he's did you do that?
He's so well equipped.

(50:47):
That's amazing.
Amazing.
I'm just saying.
Good job, Rebecca.
Where do we, good job.
Where do we find the indoordogs?
For the ones who are burnt outon the young dogs.
The pups.
The pups work.
Puppies.
The pups.
Work.
Work.
AA meetings or work?
She doesn't work.

(51:07):
She just quit her job.
But Rebecca, no, I know.
Are you not listening?
I'm literally unemployed.
No, I know.
I know.
Sorry.
A hospital.
You could find a nice olddoctor.
A nice little doctor.
Insurance.
What the fuck I'm gonna do in ahospital?
Yeah.
It's just go walk around.
Just go walk around, bill.
Scope them out.

(51:28):
Yeah, so I'm never gonna findthis.
no one goes to bars anymore.
You're who goes to bars?
Everyone's hangovers at thisage.
That's what I mean, likeeveryone's had hangovers at this
age.
So like where do you go?
Where are they?
Where do you go?
I'm at home.
I, why are they not coming tome?
Like DoorDash is, they're not atDoorDash.

(51:49):
DoorDash, but for dating for menand you can order.
That's dangerous.
That's an escort though.
Wait, I think, no.
Wait, hold on.
I think that's Grindr.
I think they think that'sGrindr.
I think it's Grinder.
What?
I'm pretty sure that's Grindrgrindr's for gaming.
No, I know, but like they justlet you know that a man is near
right.
So no, but I'm saying I want adelivery of men.

(52:11):
Oh, okay.
Yes.
see.
But then they can't come to yourhome because that will get
murder thing.
I know.
Yeah.
The mur, the murdery part of itis how do, maybe if they have to
wear a blindfold and then like acar takes them to you.
And you just see, you ask acouple of questions and then you
dismiss.
Yeah, that's very involved.

(52:32):
And then you dismiss.
I like how you're like alreadydismissing.
You're like, you ask a couplequestions and then you just
dismiss.
I gotta check, check the peopleoff real quick, real quick.
This is very involved, butthere's potential elder
millennials try bars.
How do we get them?
Just like to a singularlocation.

(52:53):
It doesn't have to be yourhouse.
You pick a location.
She's talking about Man Island.
Remember Rebecca?
What is this?
Oh, oh man.
All of my ideas are taken.
All my ideas.
No man island.
No man Island is a subset ofwhite people island.
So that's the one where like allmen, we just put all men on an

(53:15):
island.
All men, like Trash Island inNew York, you just put all the
men on there and in order tocome back Island is, yeah, that
sounds beautiful.
Okay.
Go.
Go on.
Yeah.
In order to come back, they haveto prove that they're not
assholes.
that's the only way they getoff.
Like man island.
So it sounds taxy, but go on.
I know.
no, that that's all.
It came ups all.
Yeah, that's it.
That's as far as, okay, sopotentially we, we bring said

(53:40):
verified men back.
Rob.
Rob says, that's how Americastarted.
God damnit Naomi.
That wrong.
There's no way to do any ofthis.
Y'all we're fun.
What about brunch?
Brunch, brunch.
Golf.
Golf.
Have you ever been to a brunchin a girls group and any sort of

(54:01):
man around gaze?
A gaze.
The gaze, I know it's likethey're.
Either the gays, the gays, ormen that are already fucking
erect.
We need more men who like tobrunch.
Like, why are you here doing,what's the dog park?
Dog park?
I find that men, men alone, whoown dogs, just men, have ept,

(54:23):
unruly dogs.
This was my ex men who arepartnered and have dogs.
Dogs are well behaved.
They're beautiful.
They do, they're lovely.
Widow widowers support group.
Yes.
I think you're, that is, that'sit.
That's it.
Yeah.
Just pretend your ex-husband'sdead.

(54:44):
They wanna be wiped up andthere's because, but you'll
never be as good.
And I will, in my mind, I'm inanxious in my mind.
I'm like, yeah, but she's dead.
She's gone.
I know she's gone, but I'llnever be.
I.
But I do.
You're onto something therethough.
I'm just so rich and I don'thave a wife to spend money on.

(55:04):
I don't know what to do.
You're like, oh, me either.
Oh, I will help you.
And my wife was so rich and nowI have all her money.
My tires widow are bald.
I don't know why this man soundslike an old lady, but he does
widow.
Yeah.
Widower support group.
So anything or there's gotta belike a, like a any, oh wait.

(55:25):
So at your kids' school, arethere dads to bring their kids?
Can you suss out maybe like sussout there, start talking to, to
some of the moms.
Like even lightly talk intoMarina and chat had a good, you
literally went to an Okay.
Oh, go ahead.
No, no, no.
I wanna hear this.
Oh, marina said have you triedthe meetup app?
So I tried that.
'cause it's not really fordating.

(55:47):
But it's just called Meetup.
And I tried that when I firstmoved to LA 10 years ago because
I was like wanting to findfriends.
Yeah.
So you can search for likethings you enjoy, like if you
enjoy going money for hikes, ifyou enjoy, my thing was like, I
looked for like gamers.
So I looked for, I joined thislike women's board game group

(56:08):
that met like once a week.
That was really cool.
And you can do that and likethrough that, just meet more
people.
Yeah.
Downloading it now.
Nice widowers in my area.
Here's the thing though, I livein hot widows in my area now.
Now I live in like a, a mid-sizeMidwestern town, so like 180,000

(56:33):
people, Missouri.
Oh, Missouri.
Real slim baby.
You can find your, I'm tellingyou, especially for, for people
who want something that, someonethat looks like me, my ex is
long distance.
He is from Baton Rouge.
it's just, ha it's so hard.
And that's why I'm just like, Ithink I'm burnt out on the pro

(56:54):
because I'm gonna go off on thistangent.
Yeah, please.
In a small town that is largelywhite, you're a black girl, you
will have guys that like clickon you because they think
they're interested in blackgirls or they're like izing in
some way, shape, or form or I amfull figured, I don't know what

(57:17):
you wanna call it, plus size,whatever.
And you have people that'll justfit that mold, that think they
want to try it.
Yeah.
And then most of them will tapout Conversation.
And that's usually like theywere just using the app for
comfort or entertainment orwhatever they will go.
But there's the few that likeget beyond that bar to where

(57:38):
like you're having an in-depthconversation to some degree and
you're like, I wanna go on adate.
And either you meet them or theydecide if they don't want to.
And it's a real like self-esteemkiller.
Yeah.
Because it's like I wasinterested and I thought that I
was into that, but it's no Iwasn't, I actually wasn't your

(57:58):
type.
You thought that you wanted to,it's like I wanted to try you on
for size to some degree and itjust like sucks.
Yeah.
And you just get like tired ofdoing that.
It's different in bigger cities.
And that's actually how I met mywas I was in New Orleans for a
girls trip.

(58:18):
I happened to, my location wason, so I was matching with all
of these men in New Orleans, andI matched with him and that's
how we came to be.
But like I've never found herethat it's worked out and yeah, I
know that I'm like burnt out onthe idea of dating in small
town.
Yeah.

(58:39):
It just feels no, no one istruly interested in okay, hear
me out a matchmaker.
it's not that I'm not opposed toit, it's not something I've ever
tried.
I don't know.
Yeah.
Like I wouldn't even know likewhere to find a match.
New New York City.
Is it for like big cities andlike the Jewish community has a

(59:01):
ton of matchmakers?
Yes.
Yeah.
Like I, I, I'm just like, I, Iwouldn't even know where to
start.
I assume there's a fee for thatas like a significant fee.
Sure.
Yeah, sure.
But, but, but they know they'rerich men and they can set you up
with the Richmond.
I'm still a lover girl.
I don't know.
Lie, despite, like all of mydisdain burnout from, I am still

(59:27):
a lover girl that just wants to,that's me.
an old, an older guy.
They grew up in different times.
They'll still bring you flowers.
They still have nice manners.
They're 80.
They're 80.
Okay.
You're going above and beyondwhere I'm willing, but yes, I, I
see where you're tracking and I,I can be on that.

(59:48):
I can be on that wavelength.
Yes.
Mm-hmm.
Hundred percent.
Or they have kids my age.
Yeah.
I'm just gonna shake that off.
Rebecca, listen, some of us havestepdaughters who are five years
younger than us.
It's fine, it's fine.
Some of us are grandmothers,some of us are grandmothers
already.
Wait, are, wait, are you, do Inot know that?

(01:00:12):
Don't tell.
Wait.
Okay.
We'll talk about this offline.
It's fine.
Rob had a daughter.
Rob was teen mom.
He had a daughter, we're similarin age by five years.
And then she had two kids.
So he's grandpa.
My, my stepmom's 43.
Aw.

(01:00:33):
I'm 35.
Yeah, I'm 36.
This year we met like 17.
If it makes that doesn't make itany better.
You know what?
Nevermind.
Anyone in chat have anysuggestions for a no?
A man for Morgan?
No.
Look at her.
Look at how good she is.
She's Joe Fucking smart.
She's smart as fuck.

(01:00:54):
Weight's not important.
gorgeous.
Great unemployed.
Two kids.
We're selling ourselves tonight.
Great.
Taste and wine.
Decent.
Anything 1399 and up will do.
Okay.
Yeah.
I I genuinely, and here's theother thing.

(01:01:17):
You're a whole different personnow than you were when you
started dating your ex.
Like you're a completely, alife, you're a lifetime apart
from who you were back then.
I, I would argue.
So I think this is the thingabout what keep trying to go
back to burnout.
I would argue that when I met myex, I was at the, the best that

(01:01:40):
I could have been.
I, so I left my ex-husband at, Iknew I wanted out.
I had thought about it, it wascalculated.
I hate to say that, but like,when you have two kids, like you
have to be Yeah, I knew that Iwas ready to go.
Here's why I like mapped it whenI, I spent nine months solo, but

(01:02:04):
I also knew that I was ready todate.
I knew that I was ready to getback in there.
I was, I had been, I physicallyfit, I was in the gym.
I, I, I had all of my shit toget, I fought house, like I was
so good.
I was making the most money I'dever made as well.
I was working for I was at thetop of my game.

(01:02:26):
And I like found myself justdecline in a relationship.
Like I just, I give so much andlove that everything else around
it dissipates.
Oh, to some degree.
And I think that that was theproblem in like my marriage.
And I think that that is wherethe burnout in relationships

(01:02:47):
comes from me, is that I just, Ipour, pour, pour poor.
So you need more boundaries andrelationships.
100%.
I pour until I have nothing withthe expectation that person on
the other side is going to pourback.
Yeah.
And they don't, don't, yeah.

(01:03:07):
And then you're like, okay, wellI'm, I'm burnt out of pouring.
yeah, you're empty.
duh.
that's the way that it works ifno one else is pouring into you.
I'm just like, I've seen that somany times for myself that I,
it's gonna take me a long timeof figuring that part out.
Yeah.
See, and what, and I'm not beingfunny, like what you were just
describing.
It's oh yeah, that's what we do.
that's what best friends do.

(01:03:28):
that's I get that reciprocalpoint and I'm, then I'm like,
then she needs a wife becauseit's you're not gonna find that
with, with men.
You're Morgan, you wanna getmarried?
Maybe should we just getmarried?
Me and you?
Listen, I have li I, me and mybrother went, out eat the other
day.
I'll take it to mine.
And I was just like, I, I am bi.

(01:03:50):
I'll say this, I find myselfsexually attracted to women, but
I don't find myself romanticallyattracted to women.
So I find it like, wanna do somethings.
Women.
Yes.
You wanna like partnership builda life, typically women.
Yeah.
but I was like.
I wouldn't mind at this point,like the fact that men just

(01:04:12):
continue to fail in the areasthat like mm-hmm.
I want partnership to be, I'dlove to just create a
partnership with a woman andboth of us just have like fun.
Mm-hmm.
We just have fun and otherplaces, other people, but like
our main partnership is.
Mm-hmm.

(01:04:33):
It feels like it's a win-win foreveryone.
To me personally, yes.
From what I've seen, it's justlike we get each other, we're
both like, especially like meand the other women, we both
have children, like we're justputting into the household in
the same way.
Then like you don't feeldrained.
You share a village.
Yeah.
You're just creating a village.

(01:04:54):
Like it always comes down tothat.
Every episode we do.
Men.
that's what Jamie and I talkabout, like if Rob goes, then
she comes live with that.
that's what I mean, just Yourbest friend, right?
I think you would have to comehere though.
No, sorry.
And maybe Jamie's but my nieceand nephew.
No, it's fine.
We'll figure it out.
Everyone's gonna figure it out.
No, it's fine.

(01:05:14):
Compromise.
That's what relationships areabout, mpromise.
It's true.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I, huh?
Yeah.
Rebecca doesn't thinkrelationships are about
compromise.
She doesn't understand.
That said compromise.
Can't do that.
Can't do that co.
That's too much.
Is there, are you getting, andare you getting anything out?
is there a part of you thatenjoys the singleness?

(01:05:37):
is there a relief in not havingto be with someone?
And I don't mean that mean, Ijust mean that is there, you
only get to focus on you.
I feel, I do feel like I havemore quiet moments.
I think when you're partnered,especially with children, you
work, you have to work, hoursare dedicated to kids, and then

(01:06:00):
the after kids hours, you feelguilty to some degree that you
haven't poured into your partnerat all.
So you give those hours to them,it's like nothing left for you.
And so I do find solace andpeace and the kids go to bed,
and that's just me.
Yeah.
And I'm not, and I've made itvery, I have made a commitment

(01:06:24):
to not, I'm not joining apps.
I'm not dating, I'm not doinganything for at least six to
nine months.
So I'm not texting anyone.
I'm not, I'm not consumed inanyone, but what I wanna do in
those hours.
Yeah.
And if that's pouring into mysocial media because I wanna
grow that, or it's pouring intomy side hustle, I can do that.

(01:06:47):
Or if I just wanna go the fuckto sleep, I.
I can do that.
So I do find peace and there's alittle very small subsect of my
life that used to go to someoneelse.
I get that.
For me, you're filling yourselfback up.
Yeah.
That's really important.
I would, I, and I would stilllike more, and I'll have to

(01:07:10):
figure out how to create thatmore.
But for right now, this littlebit does feel like something
really and needed.
Yeah.
Necessary for you.
Yeah.
Any of it.
So that part's nice.
I'm not gonna lie.
Yeah.
It gets, it's, it's lonely too.

(01:07:31):
Yeah.
Oh yeah.
But it's, but there's somethingnice, there's something nice
about being lonely right now.
there's something nice aboutbeing lonely.
Right now.
I'm sure it will, it will getheavy at some point.
But right now, if there'ssomething nice about feeling
low, is it'cause of thepossibility of what's to come?

(01:07:53):
Is that the nice part?
Maybe I, I don't even think I'mlike considering what's to come
right now.
I think I'm just like, it feelsnice for the first time to not
want comfort from anyone butmyself.
Oh wow.
Okay.
Like usually when I'm lonely andlike turning to someone very

(01:08:19):
specific, like knowing yourchild, you're lonely.
Like you can be your parentslike you're best friend, And I
don't, in this season, I'm notdoing that.
Like when I'm lonely, I'm justlike, I just sit and it's all I
just don't want to fill thespace and there's something like

(01:08:40):
comforting about that.
I'm not, I'm not turning toanyone.
I think it's just the whole,like being comfortable with
yourself and being, I know thissounds super fucking cheesy, but
like being fluffy and Yeah.
Yeah.
Being able to sit with yourselfand being able to be alone and
like I had never been able to dothat before.

(01:09:03):
Yeah.
I think that's really important.
Always been uncomfortable for meand I, I fear, which is maybe
why I've held on relationshipsfor so long.
Yeah.
I would let myself get toburnout relationships because.
The fear of, I like the comfortof having someone and I fear
being by myself.

(01:09:23):
Whereas now it almost feelsreally easy to just cut some
shit off because I'm like, Iactually feel okay right now.
I, I'm good.
I think this is good.
I literally think you'rehealing, I think you're just
healing yourself.
Yeah.
And that's great.
I was like, I was gonna say, andyou don't have to answer, and I
don't mean this the way itsounds, but are you in therapy?

(01:09:44):
not at the moment.
I had been on a sort of two yearstint of therapy.
I cut my therapy off when Iinjured my knee that I
significantly injured my knee.
I had a full knee reconstructionand I financially swap, pt, PT
for therapy for regular therapy,mental therapy versus physical

(01:10:06):
therapy.
Pricewise, I had to pick one orthe other.
Physical therapy, was moreimportant at the time.
Yeah.
and I had not yet switched back,but, the work that we did prior
to surgery encompassedeverything that was happening in
my life at the time, whichexcluded this partnership with,
now X.
Yeah.
And that work has carried methrough.

(01:10:28):
Rebecca knows we broke up andgot back together.
Yeah.
Has carried me through the USgetting back together and then
breaking up again.
I will go back when.
Yeah.
Yeah, of course.
I was just thinking I feel likethis is definitely something
that like, I know I've, I'vepersonally worked on like with
my therapist and, and also yeah,just leaning.

(01:10:49):
On your village, leaning on yourbesties, leaning on your
friends, leaning on oldcoworkers, and talking about it.
Amazing.
Like how you find the support inold coworkers.
Mm-hmm.
I have the majority of my, likereally close friends now have
all come from my relationshipsand toxic workplaces.

(01:11:12):
Like before Rebecca, same Erica,Shanita, Rachel I have, and like
Girl Gang.
Mm-hmm.
That all came from like toxicworkplaces and you just figure
out how to support each otherand then you just carry that on
through everything else thathappens.
Yeah.
In your life.
So like finding, finding yourpeople through, once you figure

(01:11:34):
out that you are in likepotential burnout space, finding
your people.
That are like, tangential tothat is really important.
Yeah, no, that's, that's supertrue.
I, I'm sorry you're goingthrough this, but I, I am
genuinely so excited for you.

(01:11:54):
I am so excited to see what'sgonna happen next.
I'm so excited to see whatyou're doing.
Like I said, you're one of thesmartest, most capable, most
talented people I know, and Iam.
I can't wait.
it's gonna be amazing whateveryou decide to do.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I, I appreciate that.
I think it's hard, it's almosthard to hear, that people are

(01:12:15):
excited about what you could door what's possible, because
honestly, like sometimes I takeleaps and I'm not really sure
about what's next.
I a hundred percent did thiswithout being sure of what was
next or what I could do or whatI wanted to do.
I saw.
Yeah, go.

(01:12:37):
I was just gonna say but what,what you are sure of is that
like you were in a shittysituation that was burning you
out, that was killing you, andthat could be both work and
relationship.
yeah.
And you got outta that and that,that's, yeah.
Amazing.
I know that it's, it's veryscary, like to not know what's

(01:12:58):
next, and that's still, ofcourse, that's gonna be there.
And you're gonna be scared andyou're gonna be anxious, but
you're still better for itbecause you got yourself away
from that and out of that.
Yeah.
It's weird.
I like, I quit everything all atonce.
I feel like I quit everythingthat like, wasn't serving me one

(01:13:18):
time.
if I quit a relationship, I quita job, I quit.
most habits that weren't servingme, I.
While that has brought to somedegree, some distress, and I
think that that's normal.
you're, you're breaking awayfrom things that you're used to.
Yeah.
It's going distress.
It's also caused like a shit tonof, so I'm excited about what's

(01:13:41):
next.
I'm also like fucking terrified.
Mm-hmm.
Maybe this shit doesn't workout.
Maybe I can't mortgage in twomonths, but, I'm confident that
me and God will work it out andit'll be fine.
Somehow, some way it's better.
Whatever happens.
It's better than where I was at.

(01:14:02):
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's enough for you're, you'reworking for you.
You're not working for somebodyelse who doesn't deserve your
work.
You're working for you.
Yeah.
And I've done that before.
that's how I started.
Yeah.
In the work from home space wasworking for myself.
And that's how I like provedmyself to get into the tech

(01:14:23):
startup space.
So I feel like just like goingback to my roots to some degree.
Yeah.
It'll be all right.
It'll be all.
I'm, I'm trying to say that in aconfident way.
It'll be all right.
I'm confident it's gonna beokay, but let's get your brother
on here.
Can we call your brother reallyquick?
Have him tell you it's gonna beokay.
And he would be like, that'swhat you need.

(01:14:44):
You already know 100.
He would like you.
You know what it is.
I got you.
Regardless, you're gonna befine.
Yeah.
I got, I got my people in mycorner and I'm one of those
people in my corner is Rebecca.
I'm super grateful for that.
The journey of Burnout andhardship and all of the shitty

(01:15:05):
stuff that happened in mycareer.
Like I've come out on the otherside with some really phenomenal
people that I get to callfriends for the rest of my life.
That part like makes it feelreally worth it.
Like the, I can't tell you that,I'm sure dam like the things
that me and Rebecca have, havetalked through and worked out on

(01:15:28):
a late night when I'm just like,I've got no one else right now.
I need you.
And having those sorts of peoplein your corner, like that's what
comes from some of these likehard moments.
I'm not saying what should stayin hard moments to gain those
friendships, but that's whatcomes out of it.
Like you're, yeah, you're bondedfor life and that part's pretty

(01:15:48):
cool.
Agree.
Yeah, trauma bonded, but it's,it's fine.
It's fine.
It's fine.
Bonded and best way to be.
Best way to be.
Listen, I feel like the majorityof I would argue that the
majority of like super closerelationships are trauma bonded.
Yeah.
We do go to war.
I would hard to find, hard tofind a relationship in my life

(01:16:10):
that has been like, oh, we justmet and it was good.
I can't really think of me.
Those don't last.
Yeah.
No, no, I, no, we just met andit was fine.
Nope.
Nothing's ever fun.
Do I still have No, all of theones that have stood like the
test of time have been like, no,we went through some shit.

(01:16:32):
Yeah.
That sucks to say, but that'sthe reality of like good
relationships are built on youunfortunately transforms.
Yeah, you're forged in hellfireand misogyny.
The patriarchy.
Oh, that's horrible.
And the way that you just putit, sorry.

(01:16:55):
Makes me cringe for everyoneinvolved.
But I, I do think that's whywomen tend to like group up
together like that because stoplike that.
Yeah.
We have to, it just makes sense.
No one else.
Mm-hmm.
It survive.
It's a survival instinct, Ithink, to just, and we all just

(01:17:15):
see each other looking likethis, about to lose our shit.
We can see it not in our eyes.
I think, think, have y'alllisten when you're in like a
Zoom.
I've worked remotely for 10years, but when you're in like a
Zoom call with a bunch of women,you can just see it on their
faces.
When everyone is just thecameras go, the cameras start
going off.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.

(01:17:37):
Everybody's thinking what I'mthinking.
Yep.
Bitch are on it.
They're all on.
My friend messaged me on a, theother day it was just all caps,
FACE face, and I was like, oh,shit on, because I forgot
myself.
But shit, place, face.
That is so fu Yeah, no, it's soreal.

(01:17:58):
Like you can just, you can pointit out with the women in the
room and when the cameras startgoing off, you're like, Ooh,
some shit is popping off rightnow.
It's literally just like, justlike looking off and just typing
Yeah.
Yeah.
they're over there.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They're like slacking theirfriends.
I love, I love those moments,honestly.

(01:18:20):
Unless you are on the receivingend of it.
Have you ever been on thereceiving end of it?
No.
'cause my meetings are sevenminutes.
We're in, we're out.
There's no lingering.
So you, I've been like, I.
The voice of the company before,Where I'm, oh yeah.
Ugh.
I am, posting the all hands.
I'm delivering a message and Ihaven't really, it's not my
message, but I'm delivering themessage, but I'm always watching

(01:18:43):
the faces and you see the likepeople and you're like, it's
not, I knew it wasn't gonnaland.
I told y'all it wasn't gonnaland.
Mm-hmm.
And it, you just see it.
That's a different feeling whereyou're like, it's going badly.
But that's also like you're justthe messenger, And you're like,
the me I be, yeah.

(01:19:04):
but they literally shoot themessenger.
There's a whole saying aboutthat.
They hate the messenger andbeing, being the messenger, and
you have to deliver what youhave to deliver.
And sometimes that means you'rein a zoom and you're witnessing
people being mad about whatyou're delivering and they're
talking about it and you'relike.

(01:19:25):
I knew this was gonna happen,but I can't smoke food.
So Oh, that's a differentfeeling.
That's a different feeling.
I don't think I've ever hadthat.
I, that would, that would, thatwould destroy my, that my
anxiety would be at a thousand.
Yeah, a hundred percent.
Yeah.
I, it's hard to keep on, youjust have to block everything.

(01:19:46):
You have to block everyth, no,you have to because it won't
stop, but, oh my God, I didn'tthink about that, Morgan.
That's terrible.
Yeah, no, thank you.
It's always like a good one inthe room that knows that you're
just, you're delivering themessage at a, like I said, you
privately girl, you're okay.
You're okay.
Just keep going.
Yeah.
And like those people, they,they save you in those long

(01:20:08):
times.
Yeah.
It, it sucks.
I like it.
I especially like it because Ihave played the long game and
all the connections I've made atthe terrible companies I've been
at, I've just kept, and now wehave hired two of them,
specifically from my team and Isold them from their companies

(01:20:29):
and then, stole another one fromanother company for a different
team.
But it's just like nice.
You just hold onto'em until it'stime to call due and then you
just bring them in.
Mm-hmm.
You have like my kids andcollecting damn working on
cards, yep.
You got a good one.
You hold on, take them with yousomewhere.

(01:20:51):
yes.
And when they decide it's finefor, yeah.
I try to, I try to pull peoplewith me only if I know it's a
good place to be though.
Now I've learned that I onlypull people with me if I know.
It's a solid place to be becauseI've pulled people with me in
places that were off shift.

(01:21:12):
Yeah, yeah.
Which, which also sucks.
damn, I didn't even pull youinto the shift though.
But here we're, yeah, but it'snot, and no, it's not you.
And you hope with the peoplethere that things would turn
around.
Sometimes it just doesn't.
Yeah.
But it, it, yeah.
Sometimes the leadership, it'salways the leadership.
It's always leadership.

(01:21:33):
When we were talking at the verybeginning about like management
and management training andleadership training, I was gonna
say I know it wouldn't solve allof the problems, but I think
even just like that beingmandatory at all companies would
help a lot.
But it, it would have to belegitimate.
It's not just like going throughthe motions and Like you said,

(01:21:55):
sometimes oh, we have a programyou can choose to go off and do
it on your own.
that's not gonna fucking work.
First of all, people aren'tgonna do that.
Yeah, but they're, or they'regonna do it and like they're
gonna phone it in.
Oh, I did it.
I, the problem is, but they'reat the top though.
The prob, that's the problem.
They're at the top and no one'sgonna make'em do it.

(01:22:15):
That's just why they make themiddle managers do it.
Like the middle managers.
That's what I'm saying.
Managers like the top needs todo it, but they won't'cause they
don't have to.
Who's going to make them?
It's really, it is incrediblyhard to enforce the top to do
it, because they always have areason why they They always have

(01:22:35):
a higher priority, a higherstrategy.
there's something else I read abook that keeps them from doing
this training that you aremaking.
People need to be a lot morefucking humble.
I tell you.
That's the, and I, I think.
I would love that to be a partof the hiring process.
Like how humble is this person?
Yeah.
How much do they know thatthey're replaceable?

(01:22:58):
That's incredibly important.
Yeah.
Leadership is no, nobody cantouch me.
So that's, I can fucking fireyou and I'll find another Joe
tomorrow.
like that's incredibly importantfor leaders to know.
And the ones who don't know it,don't ever hire them because if
they feel like they'reexpendable, they're not going to

(01:23:20):
join you in the mission ofserving people.
If that's what you want to do.
And if your company is not aboutthe mission of serving people,
then this doesn't even apply.
But if you would like for thatto be a part of your mission,
Rebecca goes, no, you need tohire people who have, you need
to hire people who have afucking ego that says, I'm not

(01:23:42):
that great.
That's what.
I was gonna say, all the peopleat the top who places I've
worked, it has not been aboutserving people.
It's been about hoovering up asmuch money as possible.
Yeah.
It's about money, making money,patriarchy and consumerism.
and the problem is you wannastart your own company, but if
it is about serving people, youcan't show a profit, then you

(01:24:04):
can't get investors.
And it's just, It's it, it's,it's gonna be, it has to, I'm
just saying that's the problemis that people are more willing
to bet on evil'cause it'sprofitable.
Mm-hmm.
this is depressing.
Yeah, this is, I'm sorry.
That's where we landed.
We just lived at a, this is agood time to end, I guess now

(01:24:24):
that we're all, sorry.
Oh, I love it.
It's literally just the realityof life.
Yeah.
I think it's, we can, yeah, wecan end, I'll say we.
I found in my, how old am I?
35?
Like 20 years of working.

(01:24:46):
That's weird.
Anyway, I don't know that likeburnout is avoidable.
I think it's just if you live inAmerica and you wanna make a
living, like not be broke andscrounging, like burnout is just
a part of your day to day.

(01:25:08):
It's just a part of the way thatyou live and the way that you
operate and trying to skirtaround it is almost more burnout
inducing than just accepting it.
Like trying to avoid being burntout probably is going to lead
you to more burnout.

(01:25:29):
So I found like taking breakspotentially like rejoining
status quo, like mm-hmm.
What just inevitably needs tohappen in all areas of your life
almost.
That includes work dating.
We've, we've attempted to find asolution to dating even, and

(01:25:51):
it's just not there.
you're gonna get fucking tired.
You're gonna get tired of thisshit because there's no easy
entertaining of it, and thatsucks.
There's no thanks for joiningus, Morgan.
Yeah, thanks.
So thanks so much.
This is, I figured I'd wrap itup on that.
No, you're a hundred percentcorrect to me.

(01:26:11):
Do we wanna wrap it up onsomething positive?
Do we have We don't have to.
No.
What's a positive question thatwe've got?
Burnout puts the blame on us.
Exploitation gives the blameback to the people really at
fault.
We refuse to be complicit in ourown exploitation.
Own exploitation.
That's what it was.
That's what you're doing too.

(01:26:32):
You're refusing to be complicitin your own exploitation and you
are leaving that we refuse to becomplicit in our own
exploitation.
Said the two per people werelooking, two people who what I
just for the two people who areemployed.
But then I remembered youweren't, but you're looking for
a job.
And I'm employed, so like I am alittle complicit.
'cause I have to, haveinsurance.

(01:26:53):
I'm gonna be, we gotta fire herfrom the podcast.
She's complicit.
So we gotta complicit we outtahere.
She is.
Done.
It'll be Morgan and Jamie fromnow on.
I love you all for giving me,some dating ideas for when I'm
ready.
Yeah, I'm fine rush.
No rush, dude.
Enjoy it a night.

(01:27:13):
Oh, I know where you need to goif anyone comes to town.
So like Iron Maiden, any of theold heads, like any, any of
those old concerts, that's wherethe cool old dudes are most
likely with money.
That's where they're gonna be.
Sorry, where did you meet yourold, where'd you meet your old

(01:27:33):
man at work?
I, he, yeah, I ran it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But that's where they go is theygo to those concerts.
They're not going back to anoffice, so that'll matter.
Also a concert.
Yes.
They're at those concerts.
So all the iron maidens, alllike the old school guys who
come around and do those tours,that's where they're gonna be
at.
Or go to concerts that you like.

(01:27:56):
They're not gonna be there.
I am to the concert by mymyself.
They're not gonna be there atall.
This is gonna be all women.
I'm very excited about it.
I'm going to a concert by myselffor the first time ever.
Yay.
On, June 10th, I think the 10th.
Nice.
Yeah, we're under 30 days.
June 10th.
Look up Jesse Reyes if you don'tknow who she is.
Jessica.
I am, yeah.

(01:28:17):
so Jessie, J-E-S-S-I-E.
And then Reyes with a Z at theend.
She's phenomenal.
she happens to write reallygreat breakup music.
Nice says to be in the audience,just like screaming and crying
at the top of my lungs bymyself.
Fuck.
Yeah.
I hope you have such a goodtime.

(01:28:37):
Never been to a concert bymyself, so I'm like, I did a
three day festival by myself andI had never done it.
Oh my God.
And I was So did you love it?
Terrified.
And then I was like, I'm so gladI did it.
I'm so glad I did it.
You did?
Okay.
Yes, because I, I, I love doingother things.
Take yourself out.
I'll go to movies.

(01:28:58):
I'll go out to eat.
Yeah.
like I'll do all the otherthings by myself, but I'm like,
oh, it's like me in a crowd.
I don't, but I'm excited.
I, I think it's gonna be fun.
You'll make so many friends justwith people around you too,
yeah, seriously.
I'm just gonna, I'm just gonnago and enjoy myself and use it

(01:29:18):
for my, TikTok and Instagramcontent.
You get to pick out a concertoutfit.
Oh, that's gonna be so exciting.
I'm, I've already startedthinking about it, but I'm on
like a weight loss journey, soI'm like, I need to wait two
weeks out because I, some of thestuff that I, I'm already
starting to lose weight.
Some of the stuff that I wantedto wear doesn't fit already.
That's great.
But I think I'm gonna try tomatch her style a little bit.

(01:29:40):
Like comfortable boots, longersocks.
I think I'm gonna do like atennis skirt style.
Mm-hmm.
Yes.
And then a crop top kind ofjersey.
She's like tomboy, girly, whichis very much my style, which is
great.
Just because I think I'm gonnatry to, I'm gonna try to mimic,
get one of those like long linelike sports bras that you can

(01:30:00):
just wear as a crop top.
Ooh.
Because they look really fuckingcute.
You can get'em at Old Navy.
Ooh, okay.
This is a good idea.
Built in support.
You don't have to wear a realbra, but you're comfortable and
you look like super cute'causeit looks like a little crop.
That would look really cute witha tennis skirt.

(01:30:21):
We also do fashion advice.
Okay.
We.
I'm gonna, when we do it, I'mgonna send picture.
Yeah, please.
Maybe I'll meet a girl.
Honestly, like the other day,not the other day, it was like a
few months ago, we were drivinghome and Emily was like, mom,
are you bi?
And I was like, I never evenconsider it'cause I married your

(01:30:43):
dad when I was 23.
But she was like, if dad dies,would you date a woman?
I was like, woman, you wouldn'tdate anybody way.
You wouldn't date.
You're right.
I would, I wouldn't.
You would just be like, Jamie,come live here.
Jamie.
Like a companionshippartnership.
Yeah.
A white, not necessarily like Iwould wanna watch.

(01:31:03):
I would honestly, I would like,I would want, do you know how
much shit we would get done ifwe had wives?
Oh my God.
So much.
So much.
You know how long it took me tofold three loads of laundry by
myself.
You know how quickly I can knockthat out with some girl talk and
put something on the TV and wejust body doubling, go.
Yes.

(01:31:24):
I, I need that in my life.
And that's why I'm like, maybeI'm just not meant for men.
Double the products.
Double the makeup.
Double the clothes.
double the help.
Double the wavelength.
You're not gonna let any beef,your makeup.
Get outta here, Rebecca.
You won't share your makeup.
Jamie, I show up trying to benot a terrible person to you.

(01:31:44):
Show up.
Not as my authentic self.
Just let me have this, you haveto find someone who doesn't do
the, you gotta find your rightpartner.
they don't do makeup.
I don't really, I don't reallydo makeup much.
see, perfect.
We're perfect there.
You guys, y'all are a match madeand have match made.
It's gonna work out perfectlywhen the time comes.
Yeah.
Shot.
Oh my God.
We are planning Rob's demisethough.

(01:32:06):
You Yeah.
You can't, you don't needsomeone to cook.
I'm a great, I'm a great cook.
Yes, please.
Yes.
Oh my God, I make food.
You wouldn't, no one would everask you again.
What's for dinner?
No one.
Oh, whatever.
You don't need to ask me.
It's gonna be beautiful.
I'm gonna plate it lovely.
You're gonna feel like you're ina gourmet restaurant and it's
gonna be delicious.

(01:32:27):
I love that.
You would never run out ofthings.
No one would ever not tell youthat they're out of toothpaste
until it's too late.
There'd be no empty rolls oftoilet paper.
None.
Or the ones that are justsitting on the empty roll or the
milk that has like this muchleft in it that's just put back
in the fridge.
Little enough to jiggle.
Yeah.

(01:32:47):
Oh, I hate that.
Yeah.
The drop never again.
No.
Never done.
Fully stocked.
Fully organized.
It'd be beautiful.
So gorgeous.
And Morgan, by the way, we dobody doubling and discord where
we get in, we get on a call andtalk to each other while like
sometimes Rebecca will beworking, I'll be like cleaning

(01:33:07):
the house sometimes.
Just to like Just to be overaround.
Yeah.
Just to have somebody there tochit chat with or just Be there
as like a support.
Yeah, that sounds lovely.
I love that.
Join us at, the only thing thatI will miss is someone like
mowing my lawn.
'cause I'll have to do that bymyself.
We can, we'll all be paid women.

(01:33:29):
There has to be,'cause we'll allbe paid women.
Sorry.
There has to be a high schoolchild somewhere who is willing
to, no one will be jealous aboutthe fact that we're more paid
than them.
Yeah.
It'll just be, yeah.
Good for you.
Yeah.
Yes.
Good for you.
I'm so proud of you.
End of sentence.
Great.
Yeah.

(01:33:49):
This sounds wonderful.
And I, I think that we've talkedme into Yeah.
I honestly, so good luck at thatconcert, finding your wife.
Yeah.
I hope she's wonderful.
I will update you.
I'm excited.
I need to be updated too, solemme, I'll update everyone.
Okay.
Okay.
Yeah.
thank you guys so much forjoining us.

(01:34:11):
We are so glad that you're here.
Thank you for the greatconversation.
Morgan, this is delightful.
No, this was great.
Was wonderful.
Morgan.
Yeah, thank you.
Tell us, tell everybody where tofind you.
Yes, where can we find you?
That's fine.
so on just about everything,it's at Morgan's tribe.
there's not a ton going on rightnow.
I am working on beefing up myTikTok.

(01:34:35):
you can also look at, at remotework Morgan, that's also TikTok.
my stand store is located there.
If you are in need of resumeservices, you're in need, help
finding a remote job, which Ihave some expertise in, you can
hit me up there and work outwhat you're looking for, what

(01:34:57):
price range, what.
Area of work.
I can get you in there.
and yeah, I, I don't really knowwhat's next for me, but keep
following and ideally somethingexciting is gonna pop up next.
Yeah, three, six months.
But also you're only two weeksin, so try to two weeks a little

(01:35:17):
rest too maybe.
Yeah.
Rest, fill yourself up a littlebit.
Find the things that fill youup, like going to a concert on
your own.
yes, anyways, we'll see you guysnext.
Thank you so much, Morgan.
Next week, we're gonna have, preis going to join us.
Dr.
Pree is going to join us.
she's a psychologist whospecializes in Neurodivergence,

(01:35:38):
A DHD and autism.
So next Thursday, join us forthat and, yeah.
I think that's it.
Subscribe, follow on all thethings.
Anne.
Thank you guys for being here.
We'll talk to you guys soon.
Love it.
Bye all.
Bye guys.
Bye.
See you.

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