February 5, 2025 • 15 mins
You’re putting in the work, following the plan, and doing everything right - so why aren't you seeing results?
In this episode, we dive into the frustrating reality of feeling stuck despite your best efforts. Whether it’s in fitness, career, or relationships, sometimes progress isn’t about working harder - it’s about working differently.
What We Cover:
• Why progress often stalls even when you're consistent
• How to recognize when you’re stuck in busy work vs. real progress
• The role of discomfort in growth - and why it's a good sign
• How shifting your perspective on success can unlock breakthroughs
• Practical steps to assess what's actually moving the needle in your life
• A challenge to rethink your approach to areas where you feel stuck
If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone who might need to hear it. And if you've had a breakthrough moment, DM me on Instagram (@cameoelysebraun) I'd love to hear about it!
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Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello and welcome to the Cameo Show.
I'm your host, cameo, and todaywe're talking about the pretty
common feeling of I'm doingeverything right, but why is it
still not working?
But before we get into all ofthat, I just want to take a
second really quick here tothank you for being here, thank
you for investing in yourselfand please, if you haven't yet,
(00:24):
like and follow or subscribe tothe channel or from whatever
podcast platform you'relistening on.
It really helps us and it isgreatly appreciated.
Now let's get into it, and Iwant to say that this isn't
meant to be hard on you, but itis a little bit of tough love,
because sometimes we need it.
I know I have needed tough lovein my life and I didn't like it
(00:47):
at the time, but I'm gratefulfor it in hindsight, because it
either opened my eyes tosomething I didn't see or it
pissed me off enough to put myass in action.
And so my goal here is not topiss you off, but it is to put
you in action.
And so my goal here is not topiss you off, but it is to put
(01:08):
you in action.
So here's the thing you aredoing everything right, you're
showing up, you're putting inthe work, you're following the
plan but, for whatever reason,you still feel stuck.
No progress, no results, justfrustration.
Sound familiar.
If you've ever hit that walland I would bet that we all have
at some point this episode isfor you.
(01:31):
Maybe you've been consistent atthe gym.
It is now February of 2025, andyou've been a month into your
routine and you're like I'vebeen doing what I'm supposed to
do.
I show up and I do my workoutand I just am not seeing the
physical changes that I expected, or that damn number on the
scale is not coming down.
(01:51):
Or maybe you've been puttingextra hours in at work, chasing
a promotion, but that's nothappening.
Or maybe it's in yourrelationship with your spouse,
your partner, your parent, yoursibling.
You're putting in a lot ofeffort.
You're trying to be aware ofyour communication skills and
your listening skills and thenbeing open to their vantage
(02:12):
point, but you're still notconnecting.
You still feel disconnected.
There's just no breakthrough.
So what do you do?
We all assume that if we workhard and if we grind, grind,
grind, that results naturallyfollow.
But sometimes it's not aboutworking harder, it's about
working differently.
And sometimes workingdifferently is harder than just
(02:34):
working harder.
It's like we hit this invisiblewall.
So, for example, if you've beengoing to the gym and that scale
isn't coming down, perhaps it'snot that you need to work out
harder.
Maybe you're giving all of youreffort.
That scale is just maybe not themeasure that you should be
looking at to see if yourprogress is actually moving in
(02:55):
the right direction.
Progress comes in waves.
We want it to be linear.
We want to get on the scale andsee that we went down five
pounds this week and thenanother five next week because
we're doing the same workout.
We're paying attention, but youget on the scale and, lo and
behold, you went back up threepounds and you're paying
attention to something thatperhaps isn't the best measure.
(03:17):
So you have to do thingsdifferently.
Maybe you gauge your progresswith regard to your workouts in
the gym based on how long you'reable to now jog on the
treadmill versus how long youhad to walk instead or how often
you had to take breaks.
Maybe you judge your success oryour progress in the gym based
(03:38):
on how many reps you can do ofan increased weight if you're
weight training versus if yourmuscles measure bigger.
Yet Maybe in your relationshipsyou celebrate small wins, like
being able to have aconversation and express
yourself and feel safe, beingvulnerable without feeling
(03:59):
guarded and getting angry andending up in an argument.
Well, maybe you're not fullyfeeling connected to that person
yet, but the fact that you wereable to do that, even in just a
small interaction or exchange,is a measure of progress.
So it isn't that you need todouble down on what you're doing
and work harder and go to thegym twice as much or try harder
(04:20):
to be accommodating to thatdifficult person in your life,
or chase harder, kiss more assat work for that promotion I
mean, I'm just being real hereor stay later.
Maybe if I work 10 hours ofovertime instead of five, it'll
show that I'm really seriousabout this promotion.
Maybe you don't need to do that.
Maybe you don't need to do that.
(04:41):
Maybe you don't need to workharder.
Maybe you just need to changeyour vantage point and measure
your progress or your ability toachieve these goals in a
different way.
Sometimes we feel comfortablejust we're doing the thing, so
we're doing it, and it must beright.
Even if we don't see results,we'll just keep doing it.
This is kind of like a greatsegue from harder versus
(05:03):
differently, versus just showingup and doing the same thing
over and over and over and overagain with no results.
Listen, I am a huge, hugeadvocate of consistency.
Being consistent will beatperfection every single time.
Making small steps in the rightdirection consistently will
beat doing something huge out ofleft field every single time.
Making small steps in the rightdirection consistently will be
(05:23):
doing something huge out of leftfield every single time.
But here's the thing If youkeep showing up and you're not
seeing any results and you'renot reflecting on what you maybe
need to do differently, askyourself am I just comfortable
hanging out here?
I'm not seeing the progress Iwant in the gym, but maybe
that's because I'm not pushingmyself, and not in a way of like
(05:44):
work harder, but in a way oflike I'm just checking the box.
I know I could probablyincrease the speed or the
incline on the treadmill, but Ijust I'm good here.
Stepping outside of your comfortzone again is not about working
harder.
It's about challenging yourselfto experiment with something
(06:05):
new, to try something new.
New does not equate to harder.
New just is often uncomfortable.
So don't get stuck in justdoing the comfortable thing.
And sometimes we stay in thisloop because it's disguised
avoidance.
What do I mean by that?
Instead of like beingproductive, you just feel like
(06:26):
you're productive.
Your results don't indicateproductive but you feel like,
well, I was busy all day.
I am scheduling date nights togo out with my husband, so that
means that our relationship'sgoing to get better.
Well, I got news for you.
That's not what it means and Ican attest to that.
A decade ago, when Greg and Iwere having some trouble in our
relationship with ourcommunication and just our
(06:49):
connection in general, we didwhat every dating relationship
expert tells you to do Date yourspouse Great advice.
But dating my spouse, or himdating me meant let's go party
together, like, let's schedulemore time to be together, leave
the kids with grandparents,we'll go out and party and we'll
(07:10):
have a blast and that's a datenight.
Never mind that we didn't likespeak to each other about
anything important during thattime, never mind that we maybe
were interacting with a ton ofother people around us and it
wasn't really about us.
It was a date and that was fine.
That's not the same thing aswhat we mean when we say date
your spouse.
Now, date your spouse.
(07:32):
Go sit at a restaurant andintimately.
Have a conversation, ask eachother about how you're feeling
about things and how you'redoing as a partner, and what are
the things that you aspire toaccomplish and what are the
things that you feel are holdingyou back.
Date your spouse and go dosomething challenging together.
We did an entire episode aboutclimbing a 14,000 foot mountain
(07:55):
in Colorado a few months ago,something we didn't really plan
for, we had never reallydiscussed, but we went and
conquered it and we did ittogether and that was a date,
because we got to go, put ournose to the grind and do
something difficult together,encourage each other, talk on
the way, see when each otherwere at our breaking points and
like figure out how to help eachother get through tough moments
(08:18):
.
So don't just do things just todo them and not see any results.
Don't just do things and staybusy and then think it's
productive.
It's not.
Get real with yourself and askam I really being productive in
this relationship?
Am I being productive at thegym?
Am I being productive at work?
Am I being productive as a mom,or am I just looking like it or
(08:41):
feeling like I have been busyall day and so therefore, that
means productive.
Hard truths, hard truths.
So here are three ways to kindof line up with those that are
simple and to the point.
If you're doing something andyou don't see results that you
want, don't work harder.
Work differently.
Stop doubling down on what'snot working.
(09:02):
Period Back to the gym.
Maybe it's not about workingout harder or longer at the gym.
Maybe you're not sleeping well.
Maybe you're not eating theright things.
Maybe you're not taking thesupplements that you need.
What are other things that youneed to tweak?
Challenge yourself.
The second thing is getuncomfortable.
Stop doing things because it'scomfortable.
If you're not getting thatpromotion at work, maybe you
(09:25):
have to have an uncomfortableconversation with your boss
about the effort that you'vebeen putting in and about what
your goals are and what theperson they're looking for for
that promotion looks like.
Are the actions that you'retaking in alignment with that?
Like?
That's an uncomfortableconversation to have, but it's
necessary.
So stop being comfortable withwhat you're doing and just being
(09:46):
okay with not getting resultsand then blaming yourself or
putting yourself through theringer.
Do things that areuncomfortable.
Have the uncomfortableconversations, make the
uncomfortable decisions and thenlook for feedback.
It's not just about the results, it's also about the feedback
that you're getting along theway and start tracking it
instead of assuming where areyour results coming from?
(10:08):
What is working?
Bust out a journal, if you needto put it in your phone notes.
Make notes on your calendarabout on this date.
We did this and the result wasthis and we felt so connected.
On this date, I put together aplan to open my own business and
a strategy and, instead of justhoping that whatever I'm
(10:30):
deciding to do is going to work,I'm tracking it so that I can
make adjustments and, instead ofjust answering emails and
getting through the day, makesure that what you're doing is
productive in the way that youneed it to be, not just because
you're supposed to be here ornot just because it's what
you've always done, but in areal, tactical, measurable way.
(10:51):
So here's your challenge.
I told you I was going to giveyou a little tough love on this
episode.
It's not because I want you tofeel bad or feel stupid or feel
like what you're doing is wrong.
It's because I want to makesure that you feel empowered to
go do things in the way that youneed to do them.
Feel empowered to make changethat's going to be meaningful in
(11:13):
your life.
So I want you to identify onearea just start with one, one
area where you feel stuck inyour life and I want you to ask
yourself am I grinding away atsomething that just isn't
working?
Am I spinning my wheels andjust full of frustration?
And then the next question iswhat can I do differently?
(11:36):
What shift can I make today todo something outside of the
scope of what I've been trying?
And then, guess what, if thatdoesn't work, do something
different the next day or thenext time.
What do they say?
The definition of insanity isdoing the same thing over and
over and over and over again,expecting different results.
If that's not right, I'm close.
(11:58):
But yeah, it's true.
If you keep doing the samething over and over and over
again and you don't get theresults that you want and
nothing ever changes, you'regoing to become insane.
And insane can look likefrustration.
Insane can look like depression.
Insane can look like isolatedfrom your family and the people
that you love and that mean themost to you.
You've got to be agile andyou've got to be able to look at
(12:22):
yourself and answer these hardquestions and give yourself some
tough love, because you deserveit and you can do it.
And, like I said, I didn't wantto hear it when I needed to hear
it, but in hindsight I'm soglad that I at least entertained
whoever was giving me thismessage so that I could really,
when I was ready, when I wasready, give myself this gift.
(12:44):
And so, when you're ready, whenyou're ready, you have to be
ready.
You have to be ready to gethonest, you have to be ready to
do hard things.
When you're ready, it's herefor you and you can do it and
you deserve it.
Listen, I want to know how wecan support you.
Please text the show or DM meat cameoelisebraun on Instagram.
(13:04):
There I'm sharing the behind thescenes of our life, the hard
things that I'm doing, the gooddays, the bad days and
everywhere in between.
Each week, we give you apodcast.
It's either me, it's my husbandand I, or we have an incredible
guest who shares usually theirstory of facing something
difficult, needing to make somebig moves, big bold changes to
(13:25):
change the trajectory of theirlife, and there are a lot of
lessons that we can learn justby seeing what other people have
been through and saying youknow what.
Not all of that resonates withme, but I can definitely take
that piece of advice and I canapply it to my life and see if
it does indeed help me, andyou'll find that likely.
There are a few little cookiecrumbs that get left behind from
(13:48):
all of these people that dohelp you.
So we have new episodes everyWednesday.
I'm so glad that you're here.
My intensity level isn't alwaysat a thousand, but today I'm
feeling really inspired andmotivated myself and really care
to extend that to you.
So thank you again so much forbeing here.
And don't forget that we onlykeep what we have by giving it
(14:10):
away.
So if something on this episoderesonated with you, share it
with someone who you think itmight resonate with too.
You only know what you knowuntil you know better, and then
you do better.
So be sure to send this tosomeone you care about, because
we all feel stuck aboutsomething at some point and need
a little support Until nexttime.
Hello and welcome to the Cameo Show.
I'm your host, cameo, and todaywe're talking about the pretty
common feeling of I'm doingeverything right, but why is it
still not working?
But before we get into all ofthat, I just want to take a
second really quick here tothank you for being here, thank
you for investing in yourselfand please, if you haven't yet,
(00:24):
like and follow or subscribe tothe channel or from whatever
podcast platform you'relistening on.
It really helps us and it isgreatly appreciated.
Now let's get into it, and Iwant to say that this isn't
meant to be hard on you, but itis a little bit of tough love,
because sometimes we need it.
I know I have needed tough lovein my life and I didn't like it
(00:47):
at the time, but I'm gratefulfor it in hindsight, because it
either opened my eyes tosomething I didn't see or it
pissed me off enough to put myass in action.
And so my goal here is not topiss you off, but it is to put
you in action.
And so my goal here is not topiss you off, but it is to put
(01:08):
you in action.
So here's the thing you aredoing everything right, you're
showing up, you're putting inthe work, you're following the
plan but, for whatever reason,you still feel stuck.
No progress, no results, justfrustration.
Sound familiar.
If you've ever hit that walland I would bet that we all have
at some point this episode isfor you.
(01:31):
Maybe you've been consistent atthe gym.
It is now February of 2025, andyou've been a month into your
routine and you're like I'vebeen doing what I'm supposed to
do.
I show up and I do my workoutand I just am not seeing the
physical changes that I expected, or that damn number on the
scale is not coming down.
(01:51):
Or maybe you've been puttingextra hours in at work, chasing
a promotion, but that's nothappening.
Or maybe it's in yourrelationship with your spouse,
your partner, your parent, yoursibling.
You're putting in a lot ofeffort.
You're trying to be aware ofyour communication skills and
your listening skills and thenbeing open to their vantage
(02:12):
point, but you're still notconnecting.
You still feel disconnected.
There's just no breakthrough.
So what do you do?
We all assume that if we workhard and if we grind, grind,
grind, that results naturallyfollow.
But sometimes it's not aboutworking harder, it's about
working differently.
And sometimes workingdifferently is harder than just
(02:34):
working harder.
It's like we hit this invisiblewall.
So, for example, if you've beengoing to the gym and that scale
isn't coming down, perhaps it'snot that you need to work out
harder.
Maybe you're giving all of youreffort.
That scale is just maybe not themeasure that you should be
looking at to see if yourprogress is actually moving in
(02:55):
the right direction.
Progress comes in waves.
We want it to be linear.
We want to get on the scale andsee that we went down five
pounds this week and thenanother five next week because
we're doing the same workout.
We're paying attention, but youget on the scale and, lo and
behold, you went back up threepounds and you're paying
attention to something thatperhaps isn't the best measure.
(03:17):
So you have to do thingsdifferently.
Maybe you gauge your progresswith regard to your workouts in
the gym based on how long you'reable to now jog on the
treadmill versus how long youhad to walk instead or how often
you had to take breaks.
Maybe you judge your success oryour progress in the gym based
(03:38):
on how many reps you can do ofan increased weight if you're
weight training versus if yourmuscles measure bigger.
Yet Maybe in your relationshipsyou celebrate small wins, like
being able to have aconversation and express
yourself and feel safe, beingvulnerable without feeling
(03:59):
guarded and getting angry andending up in an argument.
Well, maybe you're not fullyfeeling connected to that person
yet, but the fact that you wereable to do that, even in just a
small interaction or exchange,is a measure of progress.
So it isn't that you need todouble down on what you're doing
and work harder and go to thegym twice as much or try harder
(04:20):
to be accommodating to thatdifficult person in your life,
or chase harder, kiss more assat work for that promotion I
mean, I'm just being real hereor stay later.
Maybe if I work 10 hours ofovertime instead of five, it'll
show that I'm really seriousabout this promotion.
Maybe you don't need to do that.
Maybe you don't need to do that.
(04:41):
Maybe you don't need to workharder.
Maybe you just need to changeyour vantage point and measure
your progress or your ability toachieve these goals in a
different way.
Sometimes we feel comfortablejust we're doing the thing, so
we're doing it, and it must beright.
Even if we don't see results,we'll just keep doing it.
This is kind of like a greatsegue from harder versus
(05:03):
differently, versus just showingup and doing the same thing
over and over and over and overagain with no results.
Listen, I am a huge, hugeadvocate of consistency.
Being consistent will beatperfection every single time.
Making small steps in the rightdirection consistently will
beat doing something huge out ofleft field every single time.
Making small steps in the rightdirection consistently will be
(05:23):
doing something huge out of leftfield every single time.
But here's the thing If youkeep showing up and you're not
seeing any results and you'renot reflecting on what you maybe
need to do differently, askyourself am I just comfortable
hanging out here?
I'm not seeing the progress Iwant in the gym, but maybe
that's because I'm not pushingmyself, and not in a way of like
(05:44):
work harder, but in a way oflike I'm just checking the box.
I know I could probablyincrease the speed or the
incline on the treadmill, but Ijust I'm good here.
Stepping outside of your comfortzone again is not about working
harder.
It's about challenging yourselfto experiment with something
(06:05):
new, to try something new.
New does not equate to harder.
New just is often uncomfortable.
So don't get stuck in justdoing the comfortable thing.
And sometimes we stay in thisloop because it's disguised
avoidance.
What do I mean by that?
Instead of like beingproductive, you just feel like
(06:26):
you're productive.
Your results don't indicateproductive but you feel like,
well, I was busy all day.
I am scheduling date nights togo out with my husband, so that
means that our relationship'sgoing to get better.
Well, I got news for you.
That's not what it means and Ican attest to that.
A decade ago, when Greg and Iwere having some trouble in our
relationship with ourcommunication and just our
(06:49):
connection in general, we didwhat every dating relationship
expert tells you to do Date yourspouse Great advice.
But dating my spouse, or himdating me meant let's go party
together, like, let's schedulemore time to be together, leave
the kids with grandparents,we'll go out and party and we'll
(07:10):
have a blast and that's a datenight.
Never mind that we didn't likespeak to each other about
anything important during thattime, never mind that we maybe
were interacting with a ton ofother people around us and it
wasn't really about us.
It was a date and that was fine.
That's not the same thing aswhat we mean when we say date
your spouse.
Now, date your spouse.
(07:32):
Go sit at a restaurant andintimately.
Have a conversation, ask eachother about how you're feeling
about things and how you'redoing as a partner, and what are
the things that you aspire toaccomplish and what are the
things that you feel are holdingyou back.
Date your spouse and go dosomething challenging together.
We did an entire episode aboutclimbing a 14,000 foot mountain
(07:55):
in Colorado a few months ago,something we didn't really plan
for, we had never reallydiscussed, but we went and
conquered it and we did ittogether and that was a date,
because we got to go, put ournose to the grind and do
something difficult together,encourage each other, talk on
the way, see when each otherwere at our breaking points and
like figure out how to help eachother get through tough moments
(08:18):
.
So don't just do things just todo them and not see any results.
Don't just do things and staybusy and then think it's
productive.
It's not.
Get real with yourself and askam I really being productive in
this relationship?
Am I being productive at thegym?
Am I being productive at work?
Am I being productive as a mom,or am I just looking like it or
(08:41):
feeling like I have been busyall day and so therefore, that
means productive.
Hard truths, hard truths.
So here are three ways to kindof line up with those that are
simple and to the point.
If you're doing something andyou don't see results that you
want, don't work harder.
Work differently.
Stop doubling down on what'snot working.
(09:02):
Period Back to the gym.
Maybe it's not about workingout harder or longer at the gym.
Maybe you're not sleeping well.
Maybe you're not eating theright things.
Maybe you're not taking thesupplements that you need.
What are other things that youneed to tweak?
Challenge yourself.
The second thing is getuncomfortable.
Stop doing things because it'scomfortable.
If you're not getting thatpromotion at work, maybe you
(09:25):
have to have an uncomfortableconversation with your boss
about the effort that you'vebeen putting in and about what
your goals are and what theperson they're looking for for
that promotion looks like.
Are the actions that you'retaking in alignment with that?
Like?
That's an uncomfortableconversation to have, but it's
necessary.
So stop being comfortable withwhat you're doing and just being
(09:46):
okay with not getting resultsand then blaming yourself or
putting yourself through theringer.
Do things that areuncomfortable.
Have the uncomfortableconversations, make the
uncomfortable decisions and thenlook for feedback.
It's not just about the results, it's also about the feedback
that you're getting along theway and start tracking it
instead of assuming where areyour results coming from?
(10:08):
What is working?
Bust out a journal, if you needto put it in your phone notes.
Make notes on your calendarabout on this date.
We did this and the result wasthis and we felt so connected.
On this date, I put together aplan to open my own business and
a strategy and, instead of justhoping that whatever I'm
(10:30):
deciding to do is going to work,I'm tracking it so that I can
make adjustments and, instead ofjust answering emails and
getting through the day, makesure that what you're doing is
productive in the way that youneed it to be, not just because
you're supposed to be here ornot just because it's what
you've always done, but in areal, tactical, measurable way.
(10:51):
So here's your challenge.
I told you I was going to giveyou a little tough love on this
episode.
It's not because I want you tofeel bad or feel stupid or feel
like what you're doing is wrong.
It's because I want to makesure that you feel empowered to
go do things in the way that youneed to do them.
Feel empowered to make changethat's going to be meaningful in
(11:13):
your life.
So I want you to identify onearea just start with one, one
area where you feel stuck inyour life and I want you to ask
yourself am I grinding away atsomething that just isn't
working?
Am I spinning my wheels andjust full of frustration?
And then the next question iswhat can I do differently?
(11:36):
What shift can I make today todo something outside of the
scope of what I've been trying?
And then, guess what, if thatdoesn't work, do something
different the next day or thenext time.
What do they say?
The definition of insanity isdoing the same thing over and
over and over and over again,expecting different results.
If that's not right, I'm close.
(11:58):
But yeah, it's true.
If you keep doing the samething over and over and over
again and you don't get theresults that you want and
nothing ever changes, you'regoing to become insane.
And insane can look likefrustration.
Insane can look like depression.
Insane can look like isolatedfrom your family and the people
that you love and that mean themost to you.
You've got to be agile andyou've got to be able to look at
(12:22):
yourself and answer these hardquestions and give yourself some
tough love, because you deserveit and you can do it.
And, like I said, I didn't wantto hear it when I needed to hear
it, but in hindsight I'm soglad that I at least entertained
whoever was giving me thismessage so that I could really,
when I was ready, when I wasready, give myself this gift.
(12:44):
And so, when you're ready, whenyou're ready, you have to be
ready.
You have to be ready to gethonest, you have to be ready to
do hard things.
When you're ready, it's herefor you and you can do it and
you deserve it.
Listen, I want to know how wecan support you.
Please text the show or DM meat cameoelisebraun on Instagram.
(13:04):
There I'm sharing the behind thescenes of our life, the hard
things that I'm doing, the gooddays, the bad days and
everywhere in between.
Each week, we give you apodcast.
It's either me, it's my husbandand I, or we have an incredible
guest who shares usually theirstory of facing something
difficult, needing to make somebig moves, big bold changes to
(13:25):
change the trajectory of theirlife, and there are a lot of
lessons that we can learn justby seeing what other people have
been through and saying youknow what.
Not all of that resonates withme, but I can definitely take
that piece of advice and I canapply it to my life and see if
it does indeed help me, andyou'll find that likely.
There are a few little cookiecrumbs that get left behind from
(13:48):
all of these people that dohelp you.
So we have new episodes everyWednesday.
I'm so glad that you're here.
My intensity level isn't alwaysat a thousand, but today I'm
feeling really inspired andmotivated myself and really care
to extend that to you.
So thank you again so much forbeing here.
And don't forget that we onlykeep what we have by giving it
(14:10):
away.
So if something on this episoderesonated with you, share it
with someone who you think itmight resonate with too.
You only know what you knowuntil you know better, and then
you do better.
So be sure to send this tosomeone you care about, because
we all feel stuck aboutsomething at some point and need
a little support Until nexttime.
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