February 9, 2024 • 17 mins
Feeling lost in a battle against alcohol while grappling with not genuinely understanding my Catholic faith, I faced a reckoning that many women endure in silence. My transformation from that point of solitude to becoming a Catholic sobriety coach is a journey I hold close to my heart, one that I'm eager to share with you.
As I peel back the layers of my story, from selling fine jewelry to navigating the digital marketing landscape, the thread of divine purpose weaves throughout. I extend this same sense of purpose to Catholic women striving to reconcile their drinking habits with their spirituality. Together, we'll confront the shadows of shame and pride, finding solace in the Church's open arms and reassurance in our inherent worth.
The journey to discover the level of sobriety that works for you consists of becoming comfortable with discomfort, but in this space, we are enveloped by a community of understanding and support.
I invite you to subscribe and walk this path of sacred sobriety with us, where continuous guidance and fellowship await at every turn.
I'm here for you. I'm praying for you. You are NOT alone!
Please subscribe to this podcast so you won't miss a thing!
Join the Sacred Sobriety Lab: https://sacredsobrietylab.com
Drink Less or Not at All FREE Guide: https://view.flodesk.com/pages/63a4abe81488000c28b9ba89
Follow me on Instagram @thecatholicsobrietycoach
Visit my Website: https://thecatholicsobrietycoach.com
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to the Catholic sobriety podcast
mini-soad.
These shorter episodes providequick tips and information that
you can refer back to when youneed it most so you can achieve
and maintain your desired levelof sobriety.
I am your sobriety coach andhost of this podcast, kristi
Walker.
Let's get started.
(00:23):
I am sometimes asked why I amthe Catholic sobriety coach, why
don't I help all women or whydon't I help all people?
Well, the fact of the matter is, when I got sober and I was in
recovery many, many years ago,for years and years and years, I
(00:48):
thought I was the only one Like.
I looked around the rooms andevents and you know mom's nights
out, park dates and I just feltlike I was the only one.
This went on for decades.
(01:09):
It wasn't until I stepped outand gave God my yes to working
with women in recovery and thoselooking to reduce or eliminate
alcohol for any reason, that hestarted putting the most amazing
(01:30):
women into my life.
When God placed this on my heartto be a Catholic sobriety coach
it was first.
You know, my background is indigital marketing, so actually
my background goes even furtherthan that.
It was in jewelry, fine jewelry, diamonds, retail, selling and
(01:52):
buying, and then I wanted tostay home with my kids and
eventually I was able to developmy own digital marketing
company.
I did a lot of work forjewelers and funeral homes,
which I know sounds kind of likea odd combination, but it works
for me.
I have other clients in otherareas, but those were my two
(02:14):
main niches.
And then I just kept feelingcalled to more, like God kept
saying I need you to dosomething for me.
I have a mission that I needyou to do, and for years I would
say it probably was four yearsof trying things and my digital
(02:40):
marketing business kind of beingstagnant, which was completely
my fault, because I didn'treally try to get clients.
I wasn't trying to put myselfout there in any way.
Quite honestly, clients justcame to me by the grace of God.
That's how I got into thefuneral home marketing business,
but that's a whole anotherstory.
(03:01):
But then I started working witha Catholic business coach and we
were trying some things and itwasn't working.
And it wasn't because itwouldn't work If I kept going.
It was because that is not whatGod was calling me to.
He was calling me to somethingelse.
So I told my coach I thinkGod's calling me to coaching and
(03:24):
she said well, okay, that'sgreat, but who are you going to
serve?
I thought that was a decentquestion, like who was I going
to serve?
Was I going to serve Catholicmoms?
Was I going to serve likemiddle-aged Catholic moms?
I didn't really know, like Ikept thinking about it and
(03:47):
praying about it and then oneday it hit me I'm a woman in
recovery, so I should probablyserve other Catholic women in
recovery because it's lonely,because nobody talks about it.
(04:10):
Well, I'm sure there are lotsof people that talk about it,
but I wasn't aware of any otherCatholic women in recovery in my
sphere of people until Istarted telling my story and
then people would come out andsay, oh yeah, I've been sober
for seven years, or I have, youknow, been in recovery for this,
or I don't drink for healthreasons, or you know, it all
(04:34):
started to come together, butfor so long I felt like just
this different person.
The other thing that happenedand I've said this before if
you've listened to my podcastand you've listened to my
earlier episodes on my journeyback to the Catholic Church in
my sobriety journey, you'll hearme say that my sobriety journey
(04:57):
and my faith journey are very,very intertwined and that is so
true.
And I know a lot of women whoare looking to reduce or
eliminate their alcoholconsumption who are very, very
faithful and very like.
Their faith is the thing thatthey are clinging to in times of
(05:23):
trouble and, quite honestly,that is what got me through and
what kept me sober and keeps mesober like every day.
It's God's grace that he'sgiven me to do this, to resist
my urges and to manage my mindand now to help other women.
But as Catholic women it'scomplex because we have to not
(05:48):
just get sober, stop drinking,whatever it is like, there's
also the faith component in it.
I tell a story and I'll tell itsome other time on the podcast
of when I came back to theCatholic Church and it wasn't
(06:10):
like the super easiest thing forme.
It wasn't nobody's fault butmine, but sometimes we need a
little guidance of someone whohas been there because and I'm
not saying that the CatholicChurch is so hard to get back
into it you just knocking downthe doors.
It's much, much easier than wethink and we are generally the
(06:31):
obstacle.
Or our mindset or our shame orour pride is what is keeping us
from coming back into fullcommunion of the faith.
Sometimes there are some otherlittle things that need to be
taken care of, but I will saythat often it's our own
(06:52):
obstacles that are keeping usfrom the church, and so we go
and we seek faith outside of theCatholic Church or in other
things, or we just feel badabout ourselves.
So that's something that I wantto help Catholic women with,
because I've walked that path.
I was a cradle Catholic.
(07:13):
I fell away from the faith.
I am what you would call arevert and I want to just let
women know like you are so lovedand the Catholic Church is the
best place for you to be.
It is the only place for you tobe, and that is part of my work
as a Catholic sobriety coachnot just to walk them through
(07:38):
protocols, preparation mindsetsand getting to the root of why
they are turning to alcohol tocope or to relax or reward
themselves or whatever it is.
There's also that faithcomponent.
I do have clients that are womenin recovery, looking to clean
(07:58):
up the mental mess, becauseanyone who has been sober for
any length of time, especiallyif you've had alcoholism or
alcohol use disorder, you knowthat once you quit drinking,
that is a big, important step,huge.
But afterwards you still kindof have the aftermath.
The first year is reallydifficult because you have to
(08:21):
learn how to develop protocolsand manage your mind around all
these different situations whereyou used to always drink, and
that's you know something thathappens within that first year
of recovery.
But even after that there'sstill other things that come up,
other roadblocks, otherobstacles, and again it's just
(08:44):
this mental mess that we have towork through.
So I am so grateful to be ableto do that.
The other thing which wasunexpected for me was that God
was asking me to work with womenwho were looking to reduce or
eliminate alcohol consumptionfor any reason.
(09:04):
But working with that group ofwomen was not my plan because,
as I've said before, I neverdrink like a normal person, like
from the first time I hadalcohol.
I misused alcohol, so I reallydidn't think that I could help
(09:24):
that group of women.
But God is so good and he hasjust given me the courage and
the confidence and let me knowthat I really do understand, and
how I understand is because Ihave been sober all these years.
But I've been able to see thisincrease in drinking among moms,
(09:50):
wives, women who have it alltogether, who seemingly have it
all together but are just.
They just have so much chaosand anxiety and shame and
self-loathing at times becauseof the way that they are
misusing alcohol.
(10:10):
And these are the women who arenot going to seek treatment
from like outpatient treatment.
These aren't the women who aregoing to step foot in a 12-step
program.
So I actually heard.
I am a student of EncounterSchool of Supernatural Ministry
(10:32):
in Portland and I heard ourdirector, kevin Monette, say
something, and he was talkingabout Portland and why he opened
the school and all of that.
But something he said resonatedso strongly with me that I
haven't been able to shake it.
And he was saying that thereason why he and his family
(10:55):
have stayed in this veryun-churched area and is really
adverse to religion in generaland God specifically, why they
are staying there.
And he said that it is to standin the gap.
Like he's here to stand in thegap.
And I started thinking aboutthat and I'm like that is
(11:18):
exactly what God is calling meto do.
And it was probably the HolySpirit I know it was who was
saying this Christy, this is whoI need you to serve, because
you are standing in the gap.
You're standing in the gapbetween the women who are able
to choose to consume alcohol ornot, consume alcohol from a
(11:40):
place of peace.
And then there's the women whoare like you.
They're in recovery or seekingrecovery.
They may identify someonehaving alcoholism or alcohol use
disorder.
But then there's this group ofwomen who are not being served,
(12:05):
who are not being helped, whoare not being encouraged,
supported and given theresources they need.
Women who are noticing thatthey are relying on alcohol more
and more.
Maybe you never used to drink infront of your kids, but now
you're realizing that you willhave a glass or two, or
(12:25):
sometimes even more, in theevenings.
Maybe, before you go out withyour friends, you have a quick
glass of your favorite alcoholicbeverage to relieve some of the
societal anxiety that you mightencounter when you go out.
Or maybe you just don't wantthem to know how much you're
drinking.
Maybe you're noticing atendency to want to hide how
(12:50):
much you drink, even from yourhusband, and maybe he's never
even expressed a concern aboutyour consumption, but you're
feeling just not right about theamount that you're consuming
and you just don't want him toknow.
Maybe you are a woman who'stried to cut back on your
drinking and you've tried a lotof things that haven't worked
(13:12):
and you're struggling becauseyou don't know who to talk to.
You don't know where to turnand you certainly don't want
anyone to think that you have adrinking problem.
Yet you feel controlled byalcohol.
You feel like you're undoingall of your other healthy habits
when you drink.
(13:32):
You're drinking so that youdon't feel as anxious.
Yet when you wake up in themorning, you feel even more
anxious, and then you havedifficulty shaking the feelings
of guilt and shame from thenight before.
But as a Catholic woman, youalso have this strong desire to
throw yourself into spendingtime with your family and you
(13:55):
want to understand more aboutyour identity as a beloved
daughter of God.
You just want to curl up at thefeet of Jesus, but you're
having trouble approaching himbecause you just maybe feel
unworthy.
Maybe you don't want to appearweak or incapable.
You might be saying things likeI have no willpower.
(14:17):
I'm never going to figurethings out.
Why can't I drink normally?
I'd hate for my kids to have tosee me like this.
There's so much more to life.
I know that God has a purposefor me.
Why do, I feel so stuck.
Maybe you're starting torealize that you need help to
(14:40):
figure it out and you're open tonew possibilities, and maybe
just maybe, you're ready to facethe discomfort of whatever is
going to happen when you reallytake a look at the way that you
drink.
As a Catholic sobriety coach, myjob is to help my clients gain
(15:02):
clarity around their drinkinghabits, decide to drink or not,
drink from a place of peace,learn how to hear the Lord's
voice more clearly.
I want to help you embrace notjust who you are, but who's you
are.
I help my clients developprotocols that help them
(15:23):
navigate social situations andremove those obstacles that are
keeping them stuck, and we do itas she's growing in faith and
trust.
My job is to provide tools andresources that support my
clients on their journey todiscover and maintain the level
(15:47):
of sobriety that is right forthem in growing faith.
And all of this isn't just formy clients, ladies, it's for you
too.
It's for you, the woman rightthere, who is listening to my
voice right now.
That is why I do what I do.
That is why I have this podcast, why I invite guests on,
(16:09):
because I want you to have thetools and resources you need.
And most of all, mostimportantly, I want you to know
that you are not alone, and itis okay if you are struggling,
and it is okay to admit that youare.
Don't forget.
You can always sign up for myfree five day sacred sobriety
(16:30):
kickstart.
You can find the link in myshow notes.
I also have my sacred sobrietylab, which is a unique self
guided journey towards freedomand spiritual growth for
Catholic women who are seekingto reduce or eliminate their
alcohol consumption.
It reveals a transformativeapproach that will change your
relationship with alcohol.
In this lab, you will learnthat it isn't about willpower,
(16:53):
but I teach you how to tap intodivine determination and harness
the power of the Holy Spirit.
This lab is not just a program.
It's a lifestyle focusing onnurturing both your physical and
spiritual well being, and thelink for that is also in my show
notes.
So that wraps up today'sepisode of the Catholic sobriety
(17:17):
mini-sode.
Thank you so much for joiningme and please be sure to
subscribe to this podcast so youdon't miss a thing.
And remember I am here for you,I am praying for you.
You are not alone.
Welcome to the Catholic sobriety podcast
mini-soad.
These shorter episodes providequick tips and information that
you can refer back to when youneed it most so you can achieve
and maintain your desired levelof sobriety.
I am your sobriety coach andhost of this podcast, kristi
Walker.
Let's get started.
(00:23):
I am sometimes asked why I amthe Catholic sobriety coach, why
don't I help all women or whydon't I help all people?
Well, the fact of the matter is, when I got sober and I was in
recovery many, many years ago,for years and years and years, I
(00:48):
thought I was the only one Like.
I looked around the rooms andevents and you know mom's nights
out, park dates and I just feltlike I was the only one.
This went on for decades.
(01:09):
It wasn't until I stepped outand gave God my yes to working
with women in recovery and thoselooking to reduce or eliminate
alcohol for any reason, that hestarted putting the most amazing
(01:30):
women into my life.
When God placed this on my heartto be a Catholic sobriety coach
it was first.
You know, my background is indigital marketing, so actually
my background goes even furtherthan that.
It was in jewelry, fine jewelry, diamonds, retail, selling and
(01:52):
buying, and then I wanted tostay home with my kids and
eventually I was able to developmy own digital marketing
company.
I did a lot of work forjewelers and funeral homes,
which I know sounds kind of likea odd combination, but it works
for me.
I have other clients in otherareas, but those were my two
(02:14):
main niches.
And then I just kept feelingcalled to more, like God kept
saying I need you to dosomething for me.
I have a mission that I needyou to do, and for years I would
say it probably was four yearsof trying things and my digital
(02:40):
marketing business kind of beingstagnant, which was completely
my fault, because I didn'treally try to get clients.
I wasn't trying to put myselfout there in any way.
Quite honestly, clients justcame to me by the grace of God.
That's how I got into thefuneral home marketing business,
but that's a whole anotherstory.
(03:01):
But then I started working witha Catholic business coach and we
were trying some things and itwasn't working.
And it wasn't because itwouldn't work If I kept going.
It was because that is not whatGod was calling me to.
He was calling me to somethingelse.
So I told my coach I thinkGod's calling me to coaching and
(03:24):
she said well, okay, that'sgreat, but who are you going to
serve?
I thought that was a decentquestion, like who was I going
to serve?
Was I going to serve Catholicmoms?
Was I going to serve likemiddle-aged Catholic moms?
I didn't really know, like Ikept thinking about it and
(03:47):
praying about it and then oneday it hit me I'm a woman in
recovery, so I should probablyserve other Catholic women in
recovery because it's lonely,because nobody talks about it.
(04:10):
Well, I'm sure there are lotsof people that talk about it,
but I wasn't aware of any otherCatholic women in recovery in my
sphere of people until Istarted telling my story and
then people would come out andsay, oh yeah, I've been sober
for seven years, or I have, youknow, been in recovery for this,
or I don't drink for healthreasons, or you know, it all
(04:34):
started to come together, butfor so long I felt like just
this different person.
The other thing that happenedand I've said this before if
you've listened to my podcastand you've listened to my
earlier episodes on my journeyback to the Catholic Church in
my sobriety journey, you'll hearme say that my sobriety journey
(04:57):
and my faith journey are very,very intertwined and that is so
true.
And I know a lot of women whoare looking to reduce or
eliminate their alcoholconsumption who are very, very
faithful and very like.
Their faith is the thing thatthey are clinging to in times of
(05:23):
trouble and, quite honestly,that is what got me through and
what kept me sober and keeps mesober like every day.
It's God's grace that he'sgiven me to do this, to resist
my urges and to manage my mindand now to help other women.
But as Catholic women it'scomplex because we have to not
(05:48):
just get sober, stop drinking,whatever it is like, there's
also the faith component in it.
I tell a story and I'll tell itsome other time on the podcast
of when I came back to theCatholic Church and it wasn't
(06:10):
like the super easiest thing forme.
It wasn't nobody's fault butmine, but sometimes we need a
little guidance of someone whohas been there because and I'm
not saying that the CatholicChurch is so hard to get back
into it you just knocking downthe doors.
It's much, much easier than wethink and we are generally the
(06:31):
obstacle.
Or our mindset or our shame orour pride is what is keeping us
from coming back into fullcommunion of the faith.
Sometimes there are some otherlittle things that need to be
taken care of, but I will saythat often it's our own
(06:52):
obstacles that are keeping usfrom the church, and so we go
and we seek faith outside of theCatholic Church or in other
things, or we just feel badabout ourselves.
So that's something that I wantto help Catholic women with,
because I've walked that path.
I was a cradle Catholic.
(07:13):
I fell away from the faith.
I am what you would call arevert and I want to just let
women know like you are so lovedand the Catholic Church is the
best place for you to be.
It is the only place for you tobe, and that is part of my work
as a Catholic sobriety coachnot just to walk them through
(07:38):
protocols, preparation mindsetsand getting to the root of why
they are turning to alcohol tocope or to relax or reward
themselves or whatever it is.
There's also that faithcomponent.
I do have clients that are womenin recovery, looking to clean
(07:58):
up the mental mess, becauseanyone who has been sober for
any length of time, especiallyif you've had alcoholism or
alcohol use disorder, you knowthat once you quit drinking,
that is a big, important step,huge.
But afterwards you still kindof have the aftermath.
The first year is reallydifficult because you have to
(08:21):
learn how to develop protocolsand manage your mind around all
these different situations whereyou used to always drink, and
that's you know something thathappens within that first year
of recovery.
But even after that there'sstill other things that come up,
other roadblocks, otherobstacles, and again it's just
(08:44):
this mental mess that we have towork through.
So I am so grateful to be ableto do that.
The other thing which wasunexpected for me was that God
was asking me to work with womenwho were looking to reduce or
eliminate alcohol consumptionfor any reason.
(09:04):
But working with that group ofwomen was not my plan because,
as I've said before, I neverdrink like a normal person, like
from the first time I hadalcohol.
I misused alcohol, so I reallydidn't think that I could help
(09:24):
that group of women.
But God is so good and he hasjust given me the courage and
the confidence and let me knowthat I really do understand, and
how I understand is because Ihave been sober all these years.
But I've been able to see thisincrease in drinking among moms,
(09:50):
wives, women who have it alltogether, who seemingly have it
all together but are just.
They just have so much chaosand anxiety and shame and
self-loathing at times becauseof the way that they are
misusing alcohol.
(10:10):
And these are the women who arenot going to seek treatment
from like outpatient treatment.
These aren't the women who aregoing to step foot in a 12-step
program.
So I actually heard.
I am a student of EncounterSchool of Supernatural Ministry
(10:32):
in Portland and I heard ourdirector, kevin Monette, say
something, and he was talkingabout Portland and why he opened
the school and all of that.
But something he said resonatedso strongly with me that I
haven't been able to shake it.
And he was saying that thereason why he and his family
(10:55):
have stayed in this veryun-churched area and is really
adverse to religion in generaland God specifically, why they
are staying there.
And he said that it is to standin the gap.
Like he's here to stand in thegap.
And I started thinking aboutthat and I'm like that is
(11:18):
exactly what God is calling meto do.
And it was probably the HolySpirit I know it was who was
saying this Christy, this is whoI need you to serve, because
you are standing in the gap.
You're standing in the gapbetween the women who are able
to choose to consume alcohol ornot, consume alcohol from a
(11:40):
place of peace.
And then there's the women whoare like you.
They're in recovery or seekingrecovery.
They may identify someonehaving alcoholism or alcohol use
disorder.
But then there's this group ofwomen who are not being served,
(12:05):
who are not being helped, whoare not being encouraged,
supported and given theresources they need.
Women who are noticing thatthey are relying on alcohol more
and more.
Maybe you never used to drink infront of your kids, but now
you're realizing that you willhave a glass or two, or
(12:25):
sometimes even more, in theevenings.
Maybe, before you go out withyour friends, you have a quick
glass of your favorite alcoholicbeverage to relieve some of the
societal anxiety that you mightencounter when you go out.
Or maybe you just don't wantthem to know how much you're
drinking.
Maybe you're noticing atendency to want to hide how
(12:50):
much you drink, even from yourhusband, and maybe he's never
even expressed a concern aboutyour consumption, but you're
feeling just not right about theamount that you're consuming
and you just don't want him toknow.
Maybe you are a woman who'stried to cut back on your
drinking and you've tried a lotof things that haven't worked
(13:12):
and you're struggling becauseyou don't know who to talk to.
You don't know where to turnand you certainly don't want
anyone to think that you have adrinking problem.
Yet you feel controlled byalcohol.
You feel like you're undoingall of your other healthy habits
when you drink.
(13:32):
You're drinking so that youdon't feel as anxious.
Yet when you wake up in themorning, you feel even more
anxious, and then you havedifficulty shaking the feelings
of guilt and shame from thenight before.
But as a Catholic woman, youalso have this strong desire to
throw yourself into spendingtime with your family and you
(13:55):
want to understand more aboutyour identity as a beloved
daughter of God.
You just want to curl up at thefeet of Jesus, but you're
having trouble approaching himbecause you just maybe feel
unworthy.
Maybe you don't want to appearweak or incapable.
You might be saying things likeI have no willpower.
(14:17):
I'm never going to figurethings out.
Why can't I drink normally?
I'd hate for my kids to have tosee me like this.
There's so much more to life.
I know that God has a purposefor me.
Why do, I feel so stuck.
Maybe you're starting torealize that you need help to
(14:40):
figure it out and you're open tonew possibilities, and maybe
just maybe, you're ready to facethe discomfort of whatever is
going to happen when you reallytake a look at the way that you
drink.
As a Catholic sobriety coach, myjob is to help my clients gain
(15:02):
clarity around their drinkinghabits, decide to drink or not,
drink from a place of peace,learn how to hear the Lord's
voice more clearly.
I want to help you embrace notjust who you are, but who's you
are.
I help my clients developprotocols that help them
(15:23):
navigate social situations andremove those obstacles that are
keeping them stuck, and we do itas she's growing in faith and
trust.
My job is to provide tools andresources that support my
clients on their journey todiscover and maintain the level
(15:47):
of sobriety that is right forthem in growing faith.
And all of this isn't just formy clients, ladies, it's for you
too.
It's for you, the woman rightthere, who is listening to my
voice right now.
That is why I do what I do.
That is why I have this podcast, why I invite guests on,
(16:09):
because I want you to have thetools and resources you need.
And most of all, mostimportantly, I want you to know
that you are not alone, and itis okay if you are struggling,
and it is okay to admit that youare.
Don't forget.
You can always sign up for myfree five day sacred sobriety
(16:30):
kickstart.
You can find the link in myshow notes.
I also have my sacred sobrietylab, which is a unique self
guided journey towards freedomand spiritual growth for
Catholic women who are seekingto reduce or eliminate their
alcohol consumption.
It reveals a transformativeapproach that will change your
relationship with alcohol.
In this lab, you will learnthat it isn't about willpower,
(16:53):
but I teach you how to tap intodivine determination and harness
the power of the Holy Spirit.
This lab is not just a program.
It's a lifestyle focusing onnurturing both your physical and
spiritual well being, and thelink for that is also in my show
notes.
So that wraps up today'sepisode of the Catholic sobriety
(17:17):
mini-sode.
Thank you so much for joiningme and please be sure to
subscribe to this podcast so youdon't miss a thing.
And remember I am here for you,I am praying for you.
You are not alone.
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The Nikki Glaser Podcast
Every week comedian and infamous roaster Nikki Glaser provides a fun, fast-paced, and brutally honest look into current pop-culture and her own personal life.