In this episode, we explore the remarkable parallels between the stages of diamond cutting and our spiritual growth. I share some of my own experiences of detachment during the early years of marriage and motherhood. They taught me invaluable lessons about the nature of faith—its ability to endure, adapt, and ultimately illuminate.
I take you through the six transformative stages of diamond cutting, drawing insights into how each phase of adversity, surrender, and refinement shapes our character and faith. From the initial challenges that help cut away the excess and imperfections, to the final polish where our true purpose gleams with clarity, every step is a testament to God's masterful craftsmanship.
This episode is an invitation to reflect on the beauty of our spiritual journey, recognizing that every hardship and act of humility is purposefully designed by God. Through prayer, service, and a life of surrender, we not only refine our faith but also become vibrant reflections of Christ's love.
Whether facing your wilderness of adversity or simply seeking inspiration to deepen your spiritual walk, this narrative promises to uplift and encourage. Let's embark on this journey together, discovering the beauty in the process and the divine purpose that outshines even the brightest gem.
I'm here for you. I'm praying for you. You are NOT alone!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to the Catholic Subriety Podcast, the
go-to resource for women seekingto have a deeper understanding
of the role alcohol plays intheir lives, women who are
looking to drink less or not atall for any reason.
I am your host, christy Walker.
I'm a wife, mom and a JoyfieldCatholic, and I am the Catholic
(00:23):
Subriety Coach, and I am so gladyou're here.
I was in class the other day.
I'm a student at EncounterSchool of Ministry and the
presenter that was there askedus to just take a moment and
talk to God and ask him how hesees our faith or how he wants
(00:50):
our faith to be, and as Ireflected in prayer, I heard God
tell me I want your faith to belike a diamond.
Now I worked in the jewelryindustry for over 15 years and
after that I even wrote forjewelers.
(01:11):
I did digital marketing forjewelers, wrote product
descriptions and all of thosethings.
So jewelry is something,especially gemstones.
I just love gemstones.
I'm not a great buyer of it,but I am a great admirer of just
gemstones in general anddiamonds.
(01:31):
And so I thought, well, that'sprobably just me imparting what
I love into what I think God isasking.
But the more I thought of it,the more I realized God was
telling me I want your faith tobe like a diamond.
(01:52):
I want it to be strong, I wantit to be beautiful, I want it to
be durable, but most of all, Iwant you to allow me to create
facets in you that are going toreflect the light of Christ to
those around you.
(02:13):
And that visual was someaningful to me and he knew
what would be.
It was so meaningful to me andactually I was struggling a bit
with a talk that I was writingon Detachment, which I gave a
few weeks ago, and I wasstruggling with what to say,
(02:35):
like nobody wants to hear metalk about Detachment and like
you should be doing this and youshould be doing that and all of
those things.
But I thought you know, if Ican compare God to a master
diamond cutter who is helping tocreate facets of faith, using
(02:58):
our efforts to detach fromthings that keep us from him,
and with the sacrifices we makeduring Lent and during all
different times of our life, ifI can make that comparison, I
think it could be beautiful andmeaningful to the women that I'm
(03:23):
going to be talking to.
And so I began writing and Icouldn't stop and I was so
excited I was just filled withthis excitement of being able to
convey this message using myown experiences and my knowledge
(03:44):
of diamonds and gemstones, andthe faith that has grown, my
faith that has grown, thanks beto God and just allowing him to
use me and to pour into me hisgrace and sisters.
(04:05):
That's what I want to talk toyou about today, because you are
a diamond and God is creatingfacets of faith through your
detachment and your sacrifice aswell.
Now start with an example frommy own life.
When my husband and I first gotmarried, we had to learn of
(04:30):
detachment right, because thetwo are becoming one.
You're learning to give, you'relearning to receive and it's,
you know, just something thathappens with newlywed couples.
And the other thing that I hadto learn to detach from was this
(04:50):
thought that we were gonna getmarried and we were going to
conceive a child right away, andit took us longer, much longer
than we had hoped.
But after years of trying, welearned that God's timing is
always perfect and we wereblessed with twins.
(05:14):
Now, I always wanted to be homewith my children.
I always did Like when I was ayoung girl, people would ask me
like what do you want to be whenyou grow up?
And I would just say I want tobe a wife and a mom.
And of course I didn't go oversuper well in the 80s, you know,
(05:34):
with women's empowerment andyou don't need a man.
Women can do everything.
A man can do even better andall of those messages that I was
getting.
But I really, at my very core,wanted to be home with my
children and I didn't think itwas going to be possible for us.
I did the math and I was likeI'm going to have to go back to
(05:58):
work.
And I remember my boss's dad,who he was retired but he would
come in and out of the jewelrystore several times a week.
But I remember him telling meyou're not going to want to come
back here after you have thosebabies.
And I was like, oh yeah, I'vegot double the diapers and all
(06:19):
of these things and we're goingto need this money.
And of course I'm going to comeback to work.
And he would just every once ina while slip that in there,
like I don't think you're goingto want to come back.
And I knew he was right, but Ididn't want to even allow myself
to dare hope that that would bea possibility.
(06:44):
However, when I was 20, about 26weeks pregnant with my twins, I
ended up being put on bed restbecause they tried to make a
break for it early, and so I wasprescribed bed rest.
I was able to get up to shower,I was able to get up to make
(07:07):
myself like a sandwich, and thenI pretty much have to drink a
ton of water and lay in bed, andthey wanted me mostly to lay on
lay in bed on my side.
So that's where I spent threemonths, and during that time I
also learned about detachment.
Right, I learned aboutdetaching from how I thought my
(07:29):
pregnancy was going to go.
I had to detach from theability to just do all those
things and prepare in the waysthat I wanted to do when I was
pregnant, because I wasn't ableto.
I had to also detach from someof my self-reliance of I'll do
(07:49):
it myself.
And my mom offered to come inand clean our house, because
this was a big thing for myhusband.
He was taking care of me, hewas taking care of our yard, he
was taking care of the house andgoing to work in a very
stressful job and that he loved.
But you know it's a lot ofstress and my mom so
(08:12):
thoughtfully offered to cleanour house and I had to just let
go of my pride and say okay,because I knew it would be
helpful to my husband and to me.
So after the three months ofbeing on bed rest, I'm happy to
report that my twins were bornat just over 38 weeks, which is
(08:39):
great for twins, and I had themand I was still planning on
going back to work.
I had set up with one of myfriends that she was going to.
She had a daycare and so shewas going to watch them and yeah
, I just was prepared for that.
(09:00):
But just the more time I spentwith them, the more I was home
with them.
I just couldn't bear thethought of not being with them.
I couldn't bear the thought ofsomeone else getting to have all
those sweet moments with them,maybe see some of their firsts
(09:21):
that I wouldn't get to seebecause I was at work and I
talked to my husband about itand I'm like really we would be
paying I mean we would be makinga little bit more money but
honestly I would be going towork to pay for someone else to
raise our children.
(09:41):
And so my husband agreed yes,you should stay home with the
kids.
But making the decision for meto stay home meant that we lost
half our income, because at thattime I was actually making the
same amount as my husband and inmaking this decision we had to
(10:03):
let go of so many things that wehad kind of become accustomed
to being a dual income householdwithout children.
Like we ate out, we just kindof did what we wanted and bought
what we wanted and didn'treally plan things.
We didn't budget, we didn'tplan meals or anything like that
and, honestly, things were okayat first.
(10:27):
But then a bigger session hitand my husband's hours were cut
dramatically.
So that meant we not only losthalf of our income from me
staying home with our boys, butwe lost some of my husband's
income because his hours werecut and things became
(10:49):
exceptionally tight for ourfamily and we had to pare down.
And then we'd have to pare downsome more and then, just when I
thought that we had pared downenough, we had to tighten our
belts even more.
So that meant no cable, thatmeant I had to have a meal plan.
(11:10):
I started making the boys' babyfood and we had to have a
budget and I hated that.
I also started clipping coupons.
This was during the time of theextreme couponing era, which I
guess was great because therewere blogs and shows and people
(11:34):
telling you how to get the mostfrom your coupons and make your
dollar stretch further.
So I had a binder full ofcoupons.
I always ended up with a bunchof stuff I didn't need, but it
didn't matter because I got itfor free.
So I was always really proud ofmy big grocery halls when I
(11:54):
would use coupons and duringthat time we often focused on
the things we didn't have orthings we didn't get to do.
But as I look back, I meanthere was so much joy just
watching my children laugh andplay and sing and dance, and all
(12:18):
the hugs and all the love likeno amount of money or luxuries
could ever compare to that.
During those years I learnedthat letting go of financial
security and things I justthought we had to have and just
(12:42):
trusting that we were making thebest decision for our family
ended up being so worth it.
So why I'm telling you this isthat I'm trying to illustrate
how letting go of things thataren't serving us or are meant
for us will allow God to grindaway the excess and help us
(13:08):
detach and become more of who hecreated us to be.
In this sacrifice and thisdetachment, he is creating
facets that enable our faith toreflect Christ's light into the
(13:30):
world, and that's why theprocess of diamond cutting just
makes so much sense to me, and Ihope that it helps you too.
Now, you probably don't know alot about the process of diamond
cutting Thankfully I do and soI'm going to explain to you how,
(13:53):
when we consider God as ourmaster diamond cutter, who
shapes our faith, using oursacrifices, sufferings, humility
and surrender, can help ourfaith become strong, resilient,
(14:14):
and it means that our detachmentisn't for nothing, so we can
focus on all that we're gaininginstead of all that we're giving
up.
Now, in the process of diamondcutting, there are about six
steps.
There's planning and cleaving,sawing, brooding, the girdle
(14:38):
polishing, inspecting andgrading, and then the final
touches and setting.
So now let's look at each ofthose steps in relation to our
faith and our spiritual lives,with God as our master diamond
cutter.
So in step one, the planningand cleaving, the master diamond
(15:04):
cutter plans.
He looks at the rough diamond.
Now I don't know if you've everseen rough diamonds before.
But they're not much to look at, they don't really reflect
light and if you saw one, youprobably you know it looks a
little different than otherrocks, so you might think that
it was cool or interesting.
But it's definitely not what apolished, faceted diamond looks
(15:30):
like.
So the diamond cutter takesthis rough stone, looks at it,
studies it and plans where tomake the right cuts.
Now I will tell you that, as amaster diamond cutter sets to
(15:51):
work, he knows that he's goingto lose 50% of the carrot weight
of that diamond.
So there is some dramaticcutting away that needs to
happen in order to bring aboutthe diamonds beauty and radiance
and be cut in a way thatreflects light and produces
(16:17):
brilliance.
The master diamond cutter alsostudies the stone, the rough
stone, and looks at it, looks atthe imperfections that need to
be cleaved away or cut away.
And that's what God does for ustoo.
He uses our life experiences,the good ones and the bad ones,
(16:42):
to shape us and mold us so thatwe can reflect the love of
Christ into our world.
Now we have free will.
We're not just an inanimaterough diamond object.
So we need to surrender to hisplans to allow him to fully work
(17:04):
within us and through us.
Now the second step is sawing.
That sounds terrible, I'm sure.
When sawing you know when weare cutting things away it is
difficult.
But God uses those difficulttimes to refine our character,
(17:25):
to cut away those impurities anddetachments that are not
serving us, and it allows him toshape us into the people he
created us to be his lights inthe world, to bring hope and
healing to others.
And he does that by working inus first and transforming us
(17:49):
from the inside out.
The third step is brooding thegirdle.
So if you look at a diamond,you will notice a very thin line
like around that separates thetop part of the diamond and the
bottom part.
That's the crown and thepavilion, and it's this very
(18:15):
smooth line that goes aroundseparating those two parts.
And in the Christian life,moments of humility and
surrender allow God to alsoround and shape our hearts and
our spirits.
But we have to be willing toallow him to mold us.
(18:40):
We need to become meek, we needto become humble.
Go back and listen to mypodcast episode with Roxanne
DeVira.
We talk about meek and humblethere.
If you aren't sure how to dothat she does a great job of
explaining it, but truly what weare doing is becoming more
(19:04):
aligned with his purpose andcapable of then reflecting his
light, his love, his mercy andcompassion into the world.
The fourth step is polishing.
Now, as we surrender to God,our hearts and minds just become
(19:25):
more reflective of his light.
But how does that happen?
It's because God is continually, continually refining and
polishing our faith through ourexperiences, through our prayer,
through our spiritual growth,through all the ways that we
(19:49):
serve others and serve thechurch, when we use our
spiritual gifts, when we use ourcharisms.
All of that is a polishing thathelps us to radiate Christ's
love to others.
The fifth step is inspectionand grading.
(20:12):
Can you guess what this has todo with Self-examination,
confession and accountability.
Now, as we seek the Lord'sforgiveness and his guidance, we
will grow and spirituallymature, and when we do that,
(20:34):
it's so much easier to hear hisvoice and align our will to his
and live out our purpose andeven know what our purpose is.
The sixth step is final touchesand setting.
This represents God's continuedwork in our lives.
(20:57):
As long as we are on this earth, god is going to be continually
working in us, and because weare human and because we are
predisposed to sin, we are goingto keep coming up against
temptations.
We're going to keep coming upagainst things, and he knows
this.
And he will continue to work inour lives, adding the finishing
(21:22):
touches to our faith, and hewill set us in positions to
shine his light into the world.
That's why it's so important tobe open and obedient to his
promptings, because he will leadus where we need to go.
In my life, I call them holybreadcrumbs, and I can look
(21:42):
where I am now and look where Iwas, and I can see all along the
way, even from my earliest daysand my earliest memories,
people that he put in my life,situations, events and things
that have led me to him and ledme to do what I'm doing today
(22:06):
and will lead me to where heleads me in the future.
So, in this light, the analogyof diamond cutting beautifully
illustrates how God, as ourmaster diamond cutter, uses our
sacrifices, our sufferings, ourhumility and surrender to
(22:26):
fashion our faith into sparkling, beautiful diamonds that
radiate Christ into the worldand draw souls to him.
Now, sometimes we surrenderwillingly and joyfully, and
other times we don't have anychoice.
But here's the good thing.
(22:48):
God uses it all.
He uses it all.
Now, if we go back to my storyand the example that I began
with, those financially tryingyears were so difficult.
I felt like I was being emptied.
(23:11):
I felt like I was beingstretched, but it led me to what
I'm doing today.
I had to be willing to let goof the work that I love to do.
My husband and I had to acceptthe financial sacrifices that
came with that decision andbecause of that, our family
(23:37):
gained so much.
If we had held tight to thosethings, if we had held so tight
to it out of fear, we might notbe where we are today.
We might not have what we havetoday, we may not know what we
(23:58):
know today and we may not haverelied on God the way that we do
today and how much we need Himand try our very best to put Him
at the center of our lives andour family.
Had that not happened and wehad been holding so tight to the
(24:19):
worldly things, to the fear ofletting go, we may have missed
out.
The desire that I had in thoseyears and the necessity for
additional income gave me thecourage to start a freelance
writing business, and the Lordjust kept leading me and giving
(24:42):
me the fortitude and the wisdomand knowledge and promptings
that I needed.
And I began using my love ofwriting and my jewelry
experience to help others andmake extra money for my family
while being home with my kids.
And this business branched offinto social media management for
(25:07):
jewelers and for funeral homes.
That's a whole other story.
Maybe I'll tell it sometime.
And I grew and grew and grewuntil the Lord called me to
sobriety coaching.
So you never have to stay stuck,you never have to feel like
you're failing, becausedetachment is a lifelong process
(25:27):
.
So if you have realized thatdrinking has become a problem
for you, if you are realizingthat it is stealing precious
moments from your life, fromyour motherhood, if it is making
it so that you are numbing notjust the bad but the joy, if
(25:48):
it's taking your ability to copewith situations in healthy ways
because it seems like it's soeasy just to grab that bottle
instead of turning to the onewho loves you most, the creator
of your soul, the creator ofyour being, then it may be time
(26:09):
for you to make a change,detaching from something that
makes you feel like you are tiedto it or enslaved by it or
trapped by it, is a very goodthing.
When we detach from something,it's not that we are depriving
ourselves, it's that we aremaking room for God to give us
(26:34):
something even better.
When we empty our hands at thefoot of the cross and we stand
there before God and we say Itrust you and we let go of fear
and we let Him fill us, that iswhere transformation will occur.
(27:01):
That is precisely where Godwill take our detachments and
our sacrifice and createbeautiful, smooth facets of
faith that will reflect Hislight into the world.
If you want extra support andaccountability to someone to
(27:25):
talk to about your goals or workwith you to formulate a goal
and help you break that downinto smaller, more attainable
steps, then I provide one-on-onecoaching.
You can always schedule a callwith me.
Just go to my website theCatholic sobriety coach and I
(27:45):
provide a 30-minute chat wherewe can talk about your goals.
You will leave there, whetheryou decide to work with me or
not, knowing what your nextsteps are, and I will provide
other resources for you as wellin that call.
I also have my Sacred sobrietylab.
It is just about out of thebeta phase.
(28:08):
We are working through a couplekinks, but it is available, it
is working and you can get that.
It is a lab that makes theprocess of discovering the level
of sobriety that is right foryou a holy work so that you can
(28:29):
dedicate it to God.
There is so much in there tohelp you and to support you.
I have options that includesomeone-on-one coaching sessions
or you can just do the lab.
If you just want a freeresource, I have that in the
show notes below.
Grab my guide, which is calledDrink Less or Not at All a
(28:52):
Catholic Guide to Freedom, inthat I have tools that I
actually use with my coachingclients, as well as some
questions you can ask yourselfafter you have maybe over
consumed alcohol or consumedalcohol when you didn't intend
to, just so that you can look atit from a place not of shame or
(29:18):
judgment, but with curiosity,and it will help you formulate a
plan for next time thatsituation arises.
So, again, I have one-on-onecoaching, my sacred sobriety lab
and the free Drink Less or Notat All Guide and, of course,
this podcast.
(29:39):
Thank you for listening.
Well, that does it for thisepisode of the Catholic sobriety
podcast.
I hope you enjoyed this episodeand I would invite you to share
it with a friend, who mightalso get value from it as well,
and make sure you subscribe soyou don't miss a thing.
I am the Catholic sobrietycoach, and if you would like to
(30:03):
learn how to work with me orlearn more about the coaching
that I offer, visit my website,thecatholicsobrietycoachcom.
Follow me on Instagram attheCatholic sobriety coach.
I look forward to speaking toyou next time, and remember I am
(30:24):
here for you.
I am praying for you.
You are not alone.
Welcome to the Catholic Subriety Podcast, the
go-to resource for women seekingto have a deeper understanding
of the role alcohol plays intheir lives, women who are
looking to drink less or not atall for any reason.
I am your host, christy Walker.
I'm a wife, mom and a JoyfieldCatholic, and I am the Catholic
(00:23):
Subriety Coach, and I am so gladyou're here.
I was in class the other day.
I'm a student at EncounterSchool of Ministry and the
presenter that was there askedus to just take a moment and
talk to God and ask him how hesees our faith or how he wants
(00:50):
our faith to be, and as Ireflected in prayer, I heard God
tell me I want your faith to belike a diamond.
Now I worked in the jewelryindustry for over 15 years and
after that I even wrote forjewelers.
(01:11):
I did digital marketing forjewelers, wrote product
descriptions and all of thosethings.
So jewelry is something,especially gemstones.
I just love gemstones.
I'm not a great buyer of it,but I am a great admirer of just
gemstones in general anddiamonds.
(01:31):
And so I thought, well, that'sprobably just me imparting what
I love into what I think God isasking.
But the more I thought of it,the more I realized God was
telling me I want your faith tobe like a diamond.
(01:52):
I want it to be strong, I wantit to be beautiful, I want it to
be durable, but most of all, Iwant you to allow me to create
facets in you that are going toreflect the light of Christ to
those around you.
(02:13):
And that visual was someaningful to me and he knew
what would be.
It was so meaningful to me andactually I was struggling a bit
with a talk that I was writingon Detachment, which I gave a
few weeks ago, and I wasstruggling with what to say,
(02:35):
like nobody wants to hear metalk about Detachment and like
you should be doing this and youshould be doing that and all of
those things.
But I thought you know, if Ican compare God to a master
diamond cutter who is helping tocreate facets of faith, using
(02:58):
our efforts to detach fromthings that keep us from him,
and with the sacrifices we makeduring Lent and during all
different times of our life, ifI can make that comparison, I
think it could be beautiful andmeaningful to the women that I'm
(03:23):
going to be talking to.
And so I began writing and Icouldn't stop and I was so
excited I was just filled withthis excitement of being able to
convey this message using myown experiences and my knowledge
(03:44):
of diamonds and gemstones, andthe faith that has grown, my
faith that has grown, thanks beto God and just allowing him to
use me and to pour into me hisgrace and sisters.
(04:05):
That's what I want to talk toyou about today, because you are
a diamond and God is creatingfacets of faith through your
detachment and your sacrifice aswell.
Now start with an example frommy own life.
When my husband and I first gotmarried, we had to learn of
(04:30):
detachment right, because thetwo are becoming one.
You're learning to give, you'relearning to receive and it's,
you know, just something thathappens with newlywed couples.
And the other thing that I hadto learn to detach from was this
(04:50):
thought that we were gonna getmarried and we were going to
conceive a child right away, andit took us longer, much longer
than we had hoped.
But after years of trying, welearned that God's timing is
always perfect and we wereblessed with twins.
(05:14):
Now, I always wanted to be homewith my children.
I always did Like when I was ayoung girl, people would ask me
like what do you want to be whenyou grow up?
And I would just say I want tobe a wife and a mom.
And of course I didn't go oversuper well in the 80s, you know,
(05:34):
with women's empowerment andyou don't need a man.
Women can do everything.
A man can do even better andall of those messages that I was
getting.
But I really, at my very core,wanted to be home with my
children and I didn't think itwas going to be possible for us.
I did the math and I was likeI'm going to have to go back to
(05:58):
work.
And I remember my boss's dad,who he was retired but he would
come in and out of the jewelrystore several times a week.
But I remember him telling meyou're not going to want to come
back here after you have thosebabies.
And I was like, oh yeah, I'vegot double the diapers and all
(06:19):
of these things and we're goingto need this money.
And of course I'm going to comeback to work.
And he would just every once ina while slip that in there,
like I don't think you're goingto want to come back.
And I knew he was right, but Ididn't want to even allow myself
to dare hope that that would bea possibility.
(06:44):
However, when I was 20, about 26weeks pregnant with my twins, I
ended up being put on bed restbecause they tried to make a
break for it early, and so I wasprescribed bed rest.
I was able to get up to shower,I was able to get up to make
(07:07):
myself like a sandwich, and thenI pretty much have to drink a
ton of water and lay in bed, andthey wanted me mostly to lay on
lay in bed on my side.
So that's where I spent threemonths, and during that time I
also learned about detachment.
Right, I learned aboutdetaching from how I thought my
(07:29):
pregnancy was going to go.
I had to detach from theability to just do all those
things and prepare in the waysthat I wanted to do when I was
pregnant, because I wasn't ableto.
I had to also detach from someof my self-reliance of I'll do
(07:49):
it myself.
And my mom offered to come inand clean our house, because
this was a big thing for myhusband.
He was taking care of me, hewas taking care of our yard, he
was taking care of the house andgoing to work in a very
stressful job and that he loved.
But you know it's a lot ofstress and my mom so
(08:12):
thoughtfully offered to cleanour house and I had to just let
go of my pride and say okay,because I knew it would be
helpful to my husband and to me.
So after the three months ofbeing on bed rest, I'm happy to
report that my twins were bornat just over 38 weeks, which is
(08:39):
great for twins, and I had themand I was still planning on
going back to work.
I had set up with one of myfriends that she was going to.
She had a daycare and so shewas going to watch them and yeah
, I just was prepared for that.
(09:00):
But just the more time I spentwith them, the more I was home
with them.
I just couldn't bear thethought of not being with them.
I couldn't bear the thought ofsomeone else getting to have all
those sweet moments with them,maybe see some of their firsts
(09:21):
that I wouldn't get to seebecause I was at work and I
talked to my husband about itand I'm like really we would be
paying I mean we would be makinga little bit more money but
honestly I would be going towork to pay for someone else to
raise our children.
(09:41):
And so my husband agreed yes,you should stay home with the
kids.
But making the decision for meto stay home meant that we lost
half our income, because at thattime I was actually making the
same amount as my husband and inmaking this decision we had to
(10:03):
let go of so many things that wehad kind of become accustomed
to being a dual income householdwithout children.
Like we ate out, we just kindof did what we wanted and bought
what we wanted and didn'treally plan things.
We didn't budget, we didn'tplan meals or anything like that
and, honestly, things were okayat first.
(10:27):
But then a bigger session hitand my husband's hours were cut
dramatically.
So that meant we not only losthalf of our income from me
staying home with our boys, butwe lost some of my husband's
income because his hours werecut and things became
(10:49):
exceptionally tight for ourfamily and we had to pare down.
And then we'd have to pare downsome more and then, just when I
thought that we had pared downenough, we had to tighten our
belts even more.
So that meant no cable, thatmeant I had to have a meal plan.
(11:10):
I started making the boys' babyfood and we had to have a
budget and I hated that.
I also started clipping coupons.
This was during the time of theextreme couponing era, which I
guess was great because therewere blogs and shows and people
(11:34):
telling you how to get the mostfrom your coupons and make your
dollar stretch further.
So I had a binder full ofcoupons.
I always ended up with a bunchof stuff I didn't need, but it
didn't matter because I got itfor free.
So I was always really proud ofmy big grocery halls when I
(11:54):
would use coupons and duringthat time we often focused on
the things we didn't have orthings we didn't get to do.
But as I look back, I meanthere was so much joy just
watching my children laugh andplay and sing and dance, and all
(12:18):
the hugs and all the love likeno amount of money or luxuries
could ever compare to that.
During those years I learnedthat letting go of financial
security and things I justthought we had to have and just
(12:42):
trusting that we were making thebest decision for our family
ended up being so worth it.
So why I'm telling you this isthat I'm trying to illustrate
how letting go of things thataren't serving us or are meant
for us will allow God to grindaway the excess and help us
(13:08):
detach and become more of who hecreated us to be.
In this sacrifice and thisdetachment, he is creating
facets that enable our faith toreflect Christ's light into the
(13:30):
world, and that's why theprocess of diamond cutting just
makes so much sense to me, and Ihope that it helps you too.
Now, you probably don't know alot about the process of diamond
cutting Thankfully I do and soI'm going to explain to you how,
(13:53):
when we consider God as ourmaster diamond cutter, who
shapes our faith, using oursacrifices, sufferings, humility
and surrender, can help ourfaith become strong, resilient,
(14:14):
and it means that our detachmentisn't for nothing, so we can
focus on all that we're gaininginstead of all that we're giving
up.
Now, in the process of diamondcutting, there are about six
steps.
There's planning and cleaving,sawing, brooding, the girdle
(14:38):
polishing, inspecting andgrading, and then the final
touches and setting.
So now let's look at each ofthose steps in relation to our
faith and our spiritual lives,with God as our master diamond
cutter.
So in step one, the planningand cleaving, the master diamond
(15:04):
cutter plans.
He looks at the rough diamond.
Now I don't know if you've everseen rough diamonds before.
But they're not much to look at, they don't really reflect
light and if you saw one, youprobably you know it looks a
little different than otherrocks, so you might think that
it was cool or interesting.
But it's definitely not what apolished, faceted diamond looks
(15:30):
like.
So the diamond cutter takesthis rough stone, looks at it,
studies it and plans where tomake the right cuts.
Now I will tell you that, as amaster diamond cutter sets to
(15:51):
work, he knows that he's goingto lose 50% of the carrot weight
of that diamond.
So there is some dramaticcutting away that needs to
happen in order to bring aboutthe diamonds beauty and radiance
and be cut in a way thatreflects light and produces
(16:17):
brilliance.
The master diamond cutter alsostudies the stone, the rough
stone, and looks at it, looks atthe imperfections that need to
be cleaved away or cut away.
And that's what God does for ustoo.
He uses our life experiences,the good ones and the bad ones,
(16:42):
to shape us and mold us so thatwe can reflect the love of
Christ into our world.
Now we have free will.
We're not just an inanimaterough diamond object.
So we need to surrender to hisplans to allow him to fully work
(17:04):
within us and through us.
Now the second step is sawing.
That sounds terrible, I'm sure.
When sawing you know when weare cutting things away it is
difficult.
But God uses those difficulttimes to refine our character,
(17:25):
to cut away those impurities anddetachments that are not
serving us, and it allows him toshape us into the people he
created us to be his lights inthe world, to bring hope and
healing to others.
And he does that by working inus first and transforming us
(17:49):
from the inside out.
The third step is brooding thegirdle.
So if you look at a diamond,you will notice a very thin line
like around that separates thetop part of the diamond and the
bottom part.
That's the crown and thepavilion, and it's this very
(18:15):
smooth line that goes aroundseparating those two parts.
And in the Christian life,moments of humility and
surrender allow God to alsoround and shape our hearts and
our spirits.
But we have to be willing toallow him to mold us.
(18:40):
We need to become meek, we needto become humble.
Go back and listen to mypodcast episode with Roxanne
DeVira.
We talk about meek and humblethere.
If you aren't sure how to dothat she does a great job of
explaining it, but truly what weare doing is becoming more
(19:04):
aligned with his purpose andcapable of then reflecting his
light, his love, his mercy andcompassion into the world.
The fourth step is polishing.
Now, as we surrender to God,our hearts and minds just become
(19:25):
more reflective of his light.
But how does that happen?
It's because God is continually, continually refining and
polishing our faith through ourexperiences, through our prayer,
through our spiritual growth,through all the ways that we
(19:49):
serve others and serve thechurch, when we use our
spiritual gifts, when we use ourcharisms.
All of that is a polishing thathelps us to radiate Christ's
love to others.
The fifth step is inspectionand grading.
(20:12):
Can you guess what this has todo with Self-examination,
confession and accountability.
Now, as we seek the Lord'sforgiveness and his guidance, we
will grow and spirituallymature, and when we do that,
(20:34):
it's so much easier to hear hisvoice and align our will to his
and live out our purpose andeven know what our purpose is.
The sixth step is final touchesand setting.
This represents God's continuedwork in our lives.
(20:57):
As long as we are on this earth, god is going to be continually
working in us, and because weare human and because we are
predisposed to sin, we are goingto keep coming up against
temptations.
We're going to keep coming upagainst things, and he knows
this.
And he will continue to work inour lives, adding the finishing
(21:22):
touches to our faith, and hewill set us in positions to
shine his light into the world.
That's why it's so important tobe open and obedient to his
promptings, because he will leadus where we need to go.
In my life, I call them holybreadcrumbs, and I can look
(21:42):
where I am now and look where Iwas, and I can see all along the
way, even from my earliest daysand my earliest memories,
people that he put in my life,situations, events and things
that have led me to him and ledme to do what I'm doing today
(22:06):
and will lead me to where heleads me in the future.
So, in this light, the analogyof diamond cutting beautifully
illustrates how God, as ourmaster diamond cutter, uses our
sacrifices, our sufferings, ourhumility and surrender to
(22:26):
fashion our faith into sparkling, beautiful diamonds that
radiate Christ into the worldand draw souls to him.
Now, sometimes we surrenderwillingly and joyfully, and
other times we don't have anychoice.
But here's the good thing.
(22:48):
God uses it all.
He uses it all.
Now, if we go back to my storyand the example that I began
with, those financially tryingyears were so difficult.
I felt like I was being emptied.
(23:11):
I felt like I was beingstretched, but it led me to what
I'm doing today.
I had to be willing to let goof the work that I love to do.
My husband and I had to acceptthe financial sacrifices that
came with that decision andbecause of that, our family
(23:37):
gained so much.
If we had held tight to thosethings, if we had held so tight
to it out of fear, we might notbe where we are today.
We might not have what we havetoday, we may not know what we
(23:58):
know today and we may not haverelied on God the way that we do
today and how much we need Himand try our very best to put Him
at the center of our lives andour family.
Had that not happened and wehad been holding so tight to the
(24:19):
worldly things, to the fear ofletting go, we may have missed
out.
The desire that I had in thoseyears and the necessity for
additional income gave me thecourage to start a freelance
writing business, and the Lordjust kept leading me and giving
(24:42):
me the fortitude and the wisdomand knowledge and promptings
that I needed.
And I began using my love ofwriting and my jewelry
experience to help others andmake extra money for my family
while being home with my kids.
And this business branched offinto social media management for
(25:07):
jewelers and for funeral homes.
That's a whole other story.
Maybe I'll tell it sometime.
And I grew and grew and grewuntil the Lord called me to
sobriety coaching.
So you never have to stay stuck,you never have to feel like
you're failing, becausedetachment is a lifelong process
(25:27):
.
So if you have realized thatdrinking has become a problem
for you, if you are realizingthat it is stealing precious
moments from your life, fromyour motherhood, if it is making
it so that you are numbing notjust the bad but the joy, if
(25:48):
it's taking your ability to copewith situations in healthy ways
because it seems like it's soeasy just to grab that bottle
instead of turning to the onewho loves you most, the creator
of your soul, the creator ofyour being, then it may be time
(26:09):
for you to make a change,detaching from something that
makes you feel like you are tiedto it or enslaved by it or
trapped by it, is a very goodthing.
When we detach from something,it's not that we are depriving
ourselves, it's that we aremaking room for God to give us
(26:34):
something even better.
When we empty our hands at thefoot of the cross and we stand
there before God and we say Itrust you and we let go of fear
and we let Him fill us, that iswhere transformation will occur.
(27:01):
That is precisely where Godwill take our detachments and
our sacrifice and createbeautiful, smooth facets of
faith that will reflect Hislight into the world.
If you want extra support andaccountability to someone to
(27:25):
talk to about your goals or workwith you to formulate a goal
and help you break that downinto smaller, more attainable
steps, then I provide one-on-onecoaching.
You can always schedule a callwith me.
Just go to my website theCatholic sobriety coach and I
(27:45):
provide a 30-minute chat wherewe can talk about your goals.
You will leave there, whetheryou decide to work with me or
not, knowing what your nextsteps are, and I will provide
other resources for you as wellin that call.
I also have my Sacred sobrietylab.
It is just about out of thebeta phase.
(28:08):
We are working through a couplekinks, but it is available, it
is working and you can get that.
It is a lab that makes theprocess of discovering the level
of sobriety that is right foryou a holy work so that you can
(28:29):
dedicate it to God.
There is so much in there tohelp you and to support you.
I have options that includesomeone-on-one coaching sessions
or you can just do the lab.
If you just want a freeresource, I have that in the
show notes below.
Grab my guide, which is calledDrink Less or Not at All a
(28:52):
Catholic Guide to Freedom, inthat I have tools that I
actually use with my coachingclients, as well as some
questions you can ask yourselfafter you have maybe over
consumed alcohol or consumedalcohol when you didn't intend
to, just so that you can look atit from a place not of shame or
(29:18):
judgment, but with curiosity,and it will help you formulate a
plan for next time thatsituation arises.
So, again, I have one-on-onecoaching, my sacred sobriety lab
and the free Drink Less or Notat All Guide and, of course,
this podcast.
(29:39):
Thank you for listening.
Well, that does it for thisepisode of the Catholic sobriety
podcast.
I hope you enjoyed this episodeand I would invite you to share
it with a friend, who mightalso get value from it as well,
and make sure you subscribe soyou don't miss a thing.
I am the Catholic sobrietycoach, and if you would like to
(30:03):
learn how to work with me orlearn more about the coaching
that I offer, visit my website,thecatholicsobrietycoachcom.
Follow me on Instagram attheCatholic sobriety coach.
I look forward to speaking toyou next time, and remember I am
(30:24):
here for you.
I am praying for you.
You are not alone.
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