August 12, 2025 • 42 mins
🎧 Part 2 of the Spit Cup Series – Featuring Mike
If you thought Part 1 was messy… buckle up. In this follow-up, Mike (founder of CouplesNextDoor) returns with the crew to talk post-play dynamics, missteps in communication, and what happens when emotions get involved in swapping.
💬 Topics include:
• Post-hookup clarity and awkward confessions
• Why who sits where still matters at the afterparty
• Chuck D’s commentary on cross-couple chemistry
📢 Advertisers:
• GlixbyJax – https://glixbyjax.com
• PassionScapes Photography – https://passionscapesphotography.com
• Playcations by Stacey – https://playcationsbystacey.com
🎙 Studio Partner:
• CouplesNextDoor – https://couplesnextdoor.com
🎙 The Down & Dirty Podcast
Hosted by: The Professor, Mrs. Doll & Chuck D
Featuring: The Dean (semi-regular guest)
Produced by: Down & Dirty Productions Company – https://downdirtyproductions.com
Music by: Victoria
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
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(00:21):
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spot. Tap the link in our show notes
when you shop Down and Dirty gets 20% to keep this podcast
going strong. You're about to listen to Part 2
of this episode. Please check the show notes so
that you can check out Part 1 also.
We're going to go ahead and bring Mike on so that he can
(01:26):
join in with the professor and the Dean and we can get all of
their perspectives on this as wego forward now.
The producer calls him the GreatOz.
No one sees him. He's just always behind the.
And the guy that no one believesexists?
They all believe it's just a figment of the professor's mind
to blame. It's my lies.
(01:48):
I'll be like, Oh no, my partner didn't.
I I didn't do that. It was him.
And he handles all that that. Could be your screen name, the
great and powerful Oz. Right.
So now we can actually jump to this question where it says what
was the original vision for CND and how close are you to
(02:10):
achieving that or have you achieved it?
Are you guys still trying to like make it better?
Well. I, I would say that it's, you
know, we, we've achieved some ofthe goals we've set out to
achieve, but no side is ever perfect.
As, as time goes by and the industry evolves, there's always
improvements that you're able tomake to make a site better.
(02:32):
You know, our, our primary goal was to make, you know, C&D, not
necessarily a, a, a classified ABS location for swingers.
The goal with it was always to create a community, a place
where people could go and interact in more ways than just,
you know, trying to set up a hookup or, or look at what the
(02:54):
events are. You know, we wanted to create a,
a community so and with that, you know, the the only
communities that were around back then were the online for
the most part was, you know, Facebook and I don't know, was
Myspace around back then? I don't remember.
The AOL chat rooms. Yeah, you know, AOL chat room
(03:14):
was a bomb and screwed the test next day.
Yeah. Chucky D you know.
It's nothing good ever came out of AOL chats.
But we wanted a Facebook for swingers, and that's exactly
what we built and says is we went through two major
iterations since we launched in 2013 and one on the cusp of
(03:36):
another big redesign and launcher within the coming
months. I'm sure you have some questions
about that, Miss Dawlo. Well, you talked about funds.
I would say that is a more perfect question for the site
than it is for our parties, our events.
You know, funds are definitely another story when it comes to
(03:59):
the website. And I mean, if we had unlimited
funds, if we would have a bomb website that had no issues at
all ever, right, Mike? Yes, I would.
Yeah, yeah. So.
You know, we do the best we can with the budget we have.
We try to give our, our members the best bang for the buck and
we were on a relatively large website for a relatively modest
(04:24):
amount of money. And you know, we, we started
seeing, do you think with what, 500 bucks back in 2013?
And you know, and we, we built it and modified it and groomed
it into what it is today. And they'll be more grooming as
time goes on. I.
(04:44):
Think people, what people have to realize is that we've been
around for a while, but initially like they were saying
it was more just, it was, it wasa community for us here in this
area and it's, it's grown. It's not like it's, it's more
organic. We didn't set it out like
there's some bigger websites whothey targeted all these
different areas and that was their goal to get into other
places. That wasn't what we set out for
(05:05):
initially. Even with the WC part, you know,
we initially started with parties just for a space for our
group. Then it was a community.
And then now we're, we're starting to evolve where it's
the community, but the communityis growing.
Like you see it. There's different states coming
involved, different major areas coming involved.
So the community is growing where that's that's going to be
something that people are. And we're already getting
(05:26):
people. We see people like the producer
and I know Mike sees people complaining sometimes about, oh,
we got all these new people coming in.
I don't feel like I want to put my pictures up right, All these
new people. I'm like, well, this is what
some of you complain about, thatyou wanted to get bigger and go
to more states than it is now that it's in.
So we're already seeing the growing pains of you want more
(05:49):
people, but you don't want the problems or whatever that, you
know, having new people kind of bring.
That was important thing you touched on was the organic
growth. So that was that was the
decision we made way back in thevery beginning is we made the
decision to not be indexed by large search engines.
We wanted the growth of CND to be organic for the most people
(06:09):
telling other people to join thesite.
If you were not familiar with CND, we were not the easiest to
find online and that was by choice because we, we know and
we've seen with other sites thatmight be bigger than us do not
necessarily have the demographics that we have.
And we wanted to try to keep things as balanced and keep the
(06:31):
site focused on, you know, couples and their lifestyle.
It's affected growth, but I think we've been able to provide
a much higher quality site as a result of that.
So would you guys say that when you started out you were looking
at producing a website for information or were you looking
(06:51):
to build a community? Definitely community.
Community. You had to do with information.
I got a question for you. This is one of my favorite ones.
How do you guys handle things like conflict?
You know, consent issues or or violations?
OK, like someone who has a complaint, right?
Rock Paper. Scissors fun that GPT.
(07:14):
No, you know what? My assistant.
My assistant handles that. But you know what, I'll talk
from a party standpoint, like anevent standpoint.
We've had some serious issues inthe last probably a couple years
come up. You know, when I say serious
issues like, you know, harm or, you know, authorities can get
involved, stuff like that, wherewe've had to take these things
(07:36):
under serious advisement. And you know, we don't take a
lot of that stuff lightly. And if there has to be a point
where we've had words send people to the authorities, we
have to. But there's also things that
come up that don't have like it's not cut and dry where you
got to make AI don't know if it's a moral decision, you would
say, but it's it's a lifestyle decision where, you know, I want
(07:58):
to give you an example without getting into it, but there's
there's times that you have to make a decision based off of
lifestyle rules. Basically, you know what, I'm, I
hope you can understand what I'msaying without me going to
specific examples. But we have to make decisions
sometimes where it's like there's not an answer for it,
but we have to come up with the best for the community.
So there's a lot of different ways.
(08:18):
Sometimes we handle it with, youknow, you got to go to the
authorities for that. This is serious enough for that.
Or there's sometimes where I have to be the bad guy, so to
speak. A lot of times I have to be the
bad guy. There's some of you guys who
fucking probably hate me for stuff because I used to make him
hate Chucky D for stuff at the parties.
I would make him go tell people to fucking.
Bad news and I did not mind doing it.
(08:41):
But my greatest Chucky D bad news story was there was a
single male who who wanted to come to the party and we and for
whatever reason, I don't remember what the reason was,
Chuck, but we were like, no, he's not fucking getting in.
And I wasn't at the door. But later Chuck comes up to me
and goes, yeah, you know, he tried to get in, right?
And I said, no, what did you tell him?
(09:02):
He goes, oh, guess what I told him.
He goes in his pocket. He pulls out a lot of money like
a little kid, like a 5 year old.It was balled up.
There was like coins in it and shit.
There was a dollar bill on the outside.
And he puts it in my hand and I go, what is this?
He goes $17.00 and 63 fucking cents.
I was like, I was like, why do you have this?
He goes, that's all he had on him.
(09:22):
He tried to sneak in the party, he said that's all he had on
him. So I took it.
Hey, he's lucky I didn't kick him out, OK?
Yeah, he loved doing that shit. Loved it so that.
Kind of plays into the next one.The next question that pops up
is how do you support newcomers who are nervous or unsure of
where to start? At our, at our events or on the.
(09:45):
On the site. Say the site.
We don't 'cause we already talked about the event.
There's no, there's no site sortof orientation.
I would say the best advice I give new people are post, get
involved. You know what I mean?
Like make comments, post pictures of yourself.
Don't just be a lurker like fucking Chucky D over there.
If you. No one's going to know who you
(10:07):
are, what you're looking for, get involved.
That's what I say for newcomers.Like I know you're probably
nervous and you're thinking, oh,this is stupid.
But if you want people to look at your profile, send you a
message, want to meet at a party, they're going to want to
see something that's just the way it is.
And you can be hot as all hell, but no one's going to know it
unless you post it out there. So that's that's my advice for
(10:27):
newcomers. You should also advise on how to
pick the right screen name. What are the screen names that
the professor absolutely hates? Or that there are 50 million of
them? There's a lot of.
People in that role of that Mike, what it what do you think,
Mike? Let's ask Mike this question.
He would know what is the most common name in the database for
(10:51):
for users. I would have to say some
variation of couple. Fun.
Fun. Sexy.
Fun couple. Fun fun.
Sexy new company. There's a lot of MN something.
Curious. Lot of curious.
Curious what else? Let's see, there's the shy.
(11:15):
That one's been a recent one lately.
Shy. I hate that one too.
I would say to. Do a query on that.
Yeah, we're going to do a poll on that.
Fun's probably, yeah. We should do what's the most
common single feel Single, single female.
What single female and single male cause the single?
Males. Single males.
Probably lately. Lately, it's Bowl.
(11:37):
Shaggy D What was Shaggy D talking about?
He a boy over there. What do you say?
What do you say? If Chucky D signed up today, it
would just be a wall full of hisbig old slong hanging it out
because that's how they do it now.
He'd just be out there flapping it around.
The new the new site should havelike a something on it for new
(11:59):
people that are, you know, signing up.
Yeah, Mike, get on there a. Name or something?
I mean, that would be kind of handy, yeah.
Or a. Name Exam.
Yeah, nothing. No, they got to.
This is like the first day of school.
You got to fight through this awkwardness.
You got to get through it on your own.
There's 1. You get 1 reprieve.
You get a chance to change it. But I think we don't let that's.
(12:21):
Hard for people It's hard for people, members The three names.
Are for. Use of C&D can change their
username under settings. See, you get one.
Everybody gets one. Peter.
Look, I would say let them fightthrough this.
Let them fuck this first one up and then you their one magic
change. We all need to go.
(12:43):
You know which ones are changingtheir username before their
weekly trial even ends. You're like, they sign up and
you're like, they're definitely connecting soon.
They're definitely changing thatsoon.
Especially the ones that sign upwith their real names.
Yeah, Aaron, Yeah. OK, the other one, the other
(13:04):
ones that I enjoy too are the ones that like they put the
picture of themselves as their profile and then like 3 or 4
scrolls. On 3/4 wall clicks.
Then you have like the heart, their faces like covered, but
you. Won't change it like 3 or 4.
Those are hilarious. And they're like, their face is
(13:26):
covered now. It's like, got you.
We didn't start there. You'll see them through the 1st
wall when they'll be like they'll put their first name out
there like Brent Rogers. Like what you know, Speaking of
that, one of the questions they had out there is how do you
maintain privacy and discretion for members both online and in
person? But let's talk about online.
(13:48):
Online you read the fucking rules and that's your profile
settings properly. People do that shit.
We just had someone on the wall the other day, like had a
security breach or whatever. Lo and behold, went in and like
they have it all registered to all.
They didn't even try to set the setting.
You want to do friend to friend.Mike, how often is it like when
there's a complaint? Is it user?
(14:10):
What's it called? User error?
Yeah, user error. 1. 110%. Of the.
Time we're testing or messaging yeah user.
And of those 110 times, how manyof those are the professors?
We had one guy, we had one guy swear up and down when he was
(14:30):
hacked, right? He said.
One guy kept saying he was hacked.
We was on the fucking horn. Like you sure, let's check this
shit out. So we was looking and Mike looks
it up and he's like the IP is coming from in your house.
His fucking wife was on his side, on his.
(14:51):
I can't tell you how many times we've been accused of being
hacked and we're hacked. It's like we're not hacked.
You just you need to talk to theother the other half here
couple. Fucking same house, yeah.
So have we, have you ever had that where you know, I hear
companies getting hacked, peoplegetting into their into the
(15:15):
system. So it has C&D ever had that
before? No.
So we, we've never had any breach of any sort.
We, we take pretty extreme lengths to protect the identity
and privacy, privacy of of our members.
We don't even handle actually any of the billing ourselves.
We actually utilize third party companies for billing.
(15:41):
Yeah, we've all been mad ACC Bill before.
So it has its challenges, but ultimately that that's their
core competency. That's what CC Bill does is just
payment processing. So when a member enters in any
of their personal information, whether it be credit card
information, etcetera, CND, we don't actually see that
information. We don't host that information,
(16:01):
We don't store that information.That's all stored with CC to
bill our payment partner so we never have to worry about that
information being at risk on what's funny.
What's funny? They're laughing at me.
I'm trying to make sure my camera see what these fucks are
doing. They're all kind of fun of me
(16:24):
because I'm moving my camera. What the hell?
Keep checking the camera angles,you don't got my good size.
It is so good we are. Not video broadcasting got that
foreheads big you, you don't need to expose it.
(16:46):
So let's let's kind of get into that, Mike, let's talk more
about the analytics. You know, how many, how many
members are active right now on the site, would you say?
Well, I don't want to give firm numbers, but I'll I'll say that
the active members over let's say a 30 day period where
someone logs in, you know, it's it wouldn't be unheard of to see
(17:09):
10,000 members log in over a onemonth period.
I didn't know there was. I remember we have people that
go away and what people don't understand is like in the
lifestyle, we have one person. We, we have, well, we have a
couple people that will sign up and they'll go away and like,
oh, I'm breaking up this week and then next week they're back.
(17:30):
So it happens every fucking week.
So three months span you got people that are logging and
logging out maybe 2-3 times. So you don't know, people will
have an inactive profile. People like, oh, there's only
inactive profiles on there. That person will be back in six
fucking months. Just wait, wait around.
(17:50):
They'll be coming back around the fucking mountain every time.
Or you have active members that only log in every couple months.
Like they're still out there, but they're just out there.
They're busy with their family or doing things.
Yeah, Well, you. Don't seem to remember too is
very high percentage of our profiles are couples.
So every profile there's two active members, you know, for
(18:11):
the most part. So you, you have a, you know, we
can clearly see it often on different profiles where there's
two different people logging in from, you know, the same
profile. So.
That's the same thing with events too.
People will see on our listing for events, you'll see like 300
on there. That's not 300 people, that's
300 profiles. So go by that, not the number
(18:33):
of, that's not the number of people.
It doesn't count people. So when you see like what I just
see the Spring Mansion party is 180.
So that's 180 profiles, not 180 people.
Interesting. Do you guys keep track of how
many members use C&D mobile versus on a computer?
80 to 85% are visiting from a mobile device.
(18:53):
I was going. To say I very I very rarely log
in on that laptop or because I forget about it.
Well, I'm I'm in the other direction.
I never I don't have the mobile app.
I didn't know you guys had one. I just do the controller.
We. Don't have a mobile app?
That's the sore subject. But it's a good subject.
(19:16):
Mike. Why?
Doesn't CNT have a mobile app? You know that that is a great
question and I find myself asking myself that why do we not
have a mobile app? And the simple answer to that is
because Google and Apple do not like our content with the
content that we have on our site.
If we were to have a mobile app,we would not be able to have the
(19:38):
wall and have albums. Well, we could have the wall, we
just wouldn't be able display any images containing any sort
of nude. Nights, gift pics and fucking
pics you like to see. We can't have that.
Yeah, so. A lot of people don't realize is
that because it's an adult website, it's actually
considered pornography to the web or World Wide Web.
(20:02):
C&D is considered an. Adult to the interweb, we are
porn. To the interweb, so we.
Are putting your little kid up there on fucking quad.
Don't post you on your fucking cool horse or your snake wrapped
around your puss because that's bestiality.
Stop doing it. No dog pigs, No cat pigs.
(20:22):
None of it. Yes, to the real world we are
considered an adult content website, so we we are plagued by
the rules and restrictions that come with that so so it's.
Not dandy, it's it applies to all swinger sites.
Yes, and some others have tried to do it and they have created
(20:43):
apps and again, those apps weren't able to show content
here, they're watered down. Versions.
Yes, they're very watered down and when you click try to click
on an image on there, it would take you off the app to to the
website and then you have to re log in to try to look at that
that image. It just was not a good user
experience. So we've tried to always create
(21:04):
a very mobile friendly website and to come you're going to see
some enhancements in US adoptingsome additional technologies
that will will make the mobile experience even more closely
resemble an app, a native app oneither Android or.
Apple, do you use apps though? Let's be honest.
(21:26):
Honestly, do you use apps? I do, while we were just talking
about this, I just used my door dash app so I can get dinner
tonight. My hotel, okay.
I'm out here in the country, they don't have DoorDash and I'm
so sad. Does xhamster have okay?
I don't know that's why I'm asking.
(21:46):
I don't use that shit unless they forced me to use it.
That's why I asked you. I don't use that.
I know you don't change. Like pictures or update your
contacts. So wait.
No, I have 10,000 contacts in myphone.
I refuse to update. If you get a new phone number,
don't fucking send it to me. All right?
Just we won't talk anymore. I'm not updating shit.
I'm not editing. Just.
(22:08):
Asking for your phone and I'll just update it myself.
You just. Put it in yourself, because I'm
not doing it. So let's talk about your
retention rate. Do you guys know what what that
looks like right now? Well.
Retention rate can be measured in several different metrics.
How long a member is on the site?
Whether someone converts from a trial member to a paid member.
(22:28):
What exactly you're referring to?
I don't know. Somebody asked that question.
I'm just. Asking.
The point it. Looks like I don't know I would.
Say I would say the general fromlike when they switch over to a
paid. What I can say is that our
retention rate is equal to or better than the industry
standards. For lifestyle sites, you're
(22:49):
saying? For lifestyle websites.
OK, so I can say the same. These questions were provided by
members of C&D. And I think what they're trying
to get to is what is the lifestyle turnover and how does
that compare to C&D? But I mean, every time you go to
an event, 60% of that crowd is brand new.
(23:09):
So the turnover in the lifestyleperiod is high, but a lot of
those people are sitting out there in the lurking in the site
and meeting people in the back and they're just not always
coming to every single party. So I'd say C&D is bigger than it
appears by just what's on the wall.
Yeah, because if you're on bigger sites, you're getting
people from the Internet now, you're getting a lot of single
(23:30):
males, you're getting a lot of fluff, you're getting a lot of
that. When you come to C&D, if you
actually go to the events, you're going to actually meet
the real people, the people thatactually doing it on those other
places. I think if you see on, I see on,
I ain't going to name it, but there's one that says it gives
you the hourly update or people that signed up today or this
week and have like a astronomical number.
(23:51):
If you dug into those profiles on there, because I have before,
I was like, those are garbage profiles.
There's their garbage profiles. If you see some oh, 10,000 today
signed up or whatever this week signed up their garbage profile.
If you come to CND when you go to events, I can say this, I, I
don't browse sites anymore, so Ican't speak to that.
(24:12):
But if you go to events from it,you're going to find way more
real people at our events than you are that sign up or that you
see on this other larger site. I can I can tell you.
That well that ties back to whatI was originally saying about
the organic growth CND yes, we could.
We could do things to make this site grow much quicker, but a
(24:33):
high percentage of those profiles would be worthless
profiles. Mike, you have had countless
conversations over the years about.
Like many, many countries. Where it's like all right, do we
flip the fucking faucet on or dowe keep it the way we keep it?
Because once you flip the fauceton you become the site that you
all fucking talk shit on that you're like, oh it's gross on
there. We either become that or we
(24:54):
think of a new way of working around it.
So it's always been a challenge of seeing.
So I mean the industry standard is realistically 3 to four
months for when a new member comes on till they're gone.
I will tell people three months is is what what you're looking.
At and and we are better than that, you know, not by, you
know, hundreds of percent, but our ours is better than that.
(25:15):
But then the the people that we tend to keep the longest are
actually the couples. And that's that.
That's what the goal of CND is, to keep the couples.
Like I was just going to say, I said if you if you are looking
for single females and you see one pop up, you have three days.
All right, you have three days. You have three days, but keep in
mind that poor woman just had 50messages thrown at her in one
(25:40):
hour. I get the damn first, but you
guys have three days, OK? How do you guys verify it's a
it's a female? A single female what?
Are you talking about how we. Verify.
How do you verify? How do you know it's not some
creeper coming on holding? Out A tag team lurking in the
background. Is that what you're saying?
Stop, man. I don't know.
(26:00):
What you're talking about? How do we know it's not A tag
team? Everyone go to tag team profile
right now. Unfriended.
Got lots of friends. We don't need to verify single
females. You got that three day period.
If they're real, there's very few real ones that stay around
(26:21):
past the trial period. So we can't verify that, but it
verifies itself. You know I mean.
It could be a male on there creeping as a single female.
Just like the couple could be a single male or a female.
I mean, maybe, maybe the better question is how does the
community verify itself? Because I think.
(26:42):
That's community. Is that the verification comes
through talking to the people and it like the people that say,
well, we didn't really message anyone.
We didn't talk to anyone. So we never really feel like we
were part of the site. Well, well, that's why because
they didn't know whether you're real or not.
You didn't post, you didn't comment, you didn't send
messages. I don't know how many times
(27:04):
people just can tell like we get.
People all the time that are saying.
Like, I'm pretty sure that's nota real.
I mean, the community policies itself.
And usually it's, it's us just taking action based on on the
community policing itself, though they'll, they'll let us
know when, hey, this profile doesn't look right.
And at that point we're able to look into it and see, yeah,
yeah, something doesn't look right here.
(27:26):
And. Recently viewed single male and
you see me on there. I'm on that ass, all right?
You know who's going to be the troublemakers?
I'm on that ass. And we have moderators that
moderate and try to those fake profiles out.
If we suspect an issue, we can ask for various types of
(27:47):
verification from them to verifywho they are.
You've got a lot of you work forthe fucking FBI.
You got a lot of questions. We're not done yet.
Hey the community had a lot of questions and I only gave them
an hour advance notice to this and we that's how many questions
(28:09):
we got. It's sitting on it.
Yeah, look. Let's let's step back to 2020,
some of our listings. Oh shit, this sounds specific.
What I'm? Doing 02020, we had COVID,
right? COVID.
I want to know how did that affect the C&D community and the
event planning. We tried to make the site fun
(28:31):
for people because we knew that everybody was just sitting at
home. So we would start doing, you
know, different picture days anddifferent.
It was kind of hard to do giveaways because usually our
giveaways are, you know, partiesand stuff like that.
Then we weren't having parties because we weren't allowed, but
(28:55):
you know, we tried to just make it more fun and, and have
different themes for different days.
And, you know, today, wear your favorite red or wear your
favorite, you know, leather. It was the longest picture theme
contest of all time. We did like it was by the week,
like by the month. It was crazy.
(29:16):
But now the story I was going totell, I thought you were going
to tell is that year it was Mardi Gras was the party, right?
So it's February, Mardi Gras wasthe party.
And everybody like this shit wasstarting to happen.
Like that little ticker up on the corner, left corner of your
screen that was counting bodies in Washington and shit.
It was low at first when Mardi Gras was popping.
(29:36):
So we had over like 500 people signed up ready to come.
And then it started getting moreserious.
Like he started seeing like it got him to the 100 thousands on
the number for COVID. And everyone was like, damn,
what are we doing? No one's made an official call
on it yet. So finally we had to make the
decision. And even the hotel was not
giving us guidance on it. The hotel wasn't saying like,
oh, you guys got to cancel it. They were just like, it's up to
(30:00):
you. It's up to you.
The CDC hasn't said anything yet.
And finally we said, you know what, just for the sake of
everyone's well-being and everything, shit, ours too,
we're going to cancel it. We got so many messages from
people because no one was canceling.
Everyone was staying like they're attending.
We got so many messages from people going thank you, man.
(30:21):
Thank you for making that decision for us because we
didn't know what to do and we were going to show up and go to
this super spreader event or whatever.
Everybody was. I got, I can't tell you how many
people said thank you for us making that decision for them.
But the next event would have been Halloween.
We did Halloween that year and it was dull.
The weird rules where you had the you had the mask on, take a
(30:44):
sip of your drink, put the mask back on.
So we had to like go around and regulate that.
The hotel made us like check to make sure people wasn't drinking
or partying without a mask on. COVID was weird.
It was basically a lost year in the, in the lifestyle itself.
It was, it was a lost year, but there was a lot of events and a
lot of things that didn't come back from COVID.
I think there was a period wherewe were sort of like we survived
(31:06):
COVID obviously because we kept having parties, but it it wasn't
until maybe a whole year later until the parties sort of
bounced back. During COVID or were there any
positives that came out of it? Stimulus check.
I don't know. Look, I don't know nothing
really like, I mean from. These standpoint we saw a pretty
significant increase in, you know, interactions on the site.
(31:31):
Yeah, people don't know. Interaction.
I mean, we did see. Parties and.
Shit, damn, I wasn't invited. Jackass.
We have a question that came up about if Minneapolis relaxed its
regulations, would you ever consider opening a private sex
club or physical venue? And I think the, the Dean and I
were aligned on this, but I'll get her answer after I answer.
But I would say no, just given our history with clubs.
(31:53):
But we, we started in club and travel around the club.
But they're cool. I, I like going to clubs, but as
far as a business goes, you got to think of a, to me, a swing
club is just like a VFW or the Legion.
Every weekend you go there and it's all Jimmy and Susan's going
to get in a fight tonight and Tommy's drunk again and it's the
same mother fucker. It's only when they have a DJ in
(32:14):
or it's the holiday party or theHalloween party where you're
going to see new people. Otherwise, the first two to
three weeks of the club are going to be the same people and
then there's one event a month, just like you would come here to
a hotel party that's bigger and there's going to be new people.
That's that's sort of my view onthe clubs.
The Dean how do you feel about it?
How is that different from our current parties and events?
No. But I'm saying we only have them
(32:35):
once a month, so people have to pick and choose when they're
going to come or they're going if you had a club.
Once a month versus every singleweekend.
Go every single. Fucking week.
OK, I. See, yeah, I don't want to go
see Tommy and Susan fight every fucking Friday, you know what I
mean? Like the same 20 people.
That's what some clubs become after a while.
Where you see C&D in the next five years?
(32:57):
Mike, you answer that one. I'll let Mike.
Answer many improvements to existing features and then we
will be adding additional features over the next 12 months
as well. The the site for the most part
is under a complete redesign andit's, it's, it's going to be
exciting. It just takes some time, but.
Well, you're teasing us now. What?
(33:18):
What? What are some of the the new
features? Yeah, I'll talk, talk about a
few, so. Yeah, Mike, don't give these
motherfuckers too much. Go ahead geek, I'll give him a
few give. Him.
A. Tease though.
One thing we're going to have iswe're going to have story.
Oh, that sounds like some new people too.
(33:40):
Young. What is that for old?
People that short videos and forthe younger ones that's what
they call reals. It's going to see some
enhancements in the photos and videos.
Actually, when you click on a video, it actually plays a
video. Yes, we'll be able to utilize a
lot. Of for me, I don't know what
other people are watching because that.
Is going on with that Mike? Why does that happen?
(34:02):
A lot of it has to do with the different codecs that are being
used nowadays for videos. I mean, Apple will use their own
type of codecs and Android will use another type and different
variations of either each of them.
So when someone uploads a video to CND, we have to take whatever
video they have and the codec they're using and then transcode
(34:24):
that video into another version.That should be compatible with
most browsers, but that that isn't always the case.
So let me interpret that please do.
That means basically CND has to take that video, do a bunch of
shit to it, and then redisplay it in a sense.
So basically stop shooting y'allshit on the wrong stuff and then
(34:46):
we could all jerk off to it. Is that what you're saying,
David? Yes, yes, definitely.
Post pictures and GIFs. That's it.
Skip the video is. It GIFs or GIFs though?
Is it GIFs or GIFs with? I call them GIFs.
I don't know. Say GIFs over the last 10 years
we've seen for the evolution of other platforms.
So you have Facebook and you have Instagram, even fucking
(35:09):
TikTok now, and the big one is Reddit where you'll see these
other places where people are going to for sort of a free
option and they're like, Oh, I can do this here.
But what I tell people all the time is a lot of those places
are closed where one, if it's ifit's a Facebook group, you're
not getting organically new people coming in, new people
going to events. You still have to actually go to
(35:31):
actual site or something to signup for events, right?
It's a little different Reddit. I still don't really under
fucking stand Reddit all the way.
It's sort of a wild, Wild West lot going on on there, but a lot
of new people are coming from there.
But it's so unsecure. It's just so I don't know.
I don't, I don't fuck with it, but a lot of people do.
But what I'm saying is, is what we've seen over the last 10
(35:52):
years is that people going to free options, free group, but
still having to come back when they really want to do lifestyle
stuff, go to lifestyle parties. They still have to come to the
paid website and the last time Ichecked, our website cost was
cheaper than a cup of coffee. Y'all buy a Starbuck Caribou
this and that. Why not go somewhere where you
can see everybody who's going tothe event in one place or you
can talk to people in real time and not worry about picture
(36:14):
stealing and whatever else you worry about on Reddit and
Facebook and those other places.But that's a challenge.
I think that challenge gets bigger for us going forward
where you're seeing a lot of thepay site you we don't see a lot
as many as we did before, a lot of new pay sites popping up, but
a lot of the same pay sites are around.
But they're all, we're all challenged by the Facebooks and
(36:35):
Reddits of the world. So the next five years is that's
that's part of the war for us. If you're not paying for it, you
are the product. So Facebook isn't making money
off you, but it's selling your data.
So you pay for C&D because C&D isn't selling your data to other
places. It blows my mind that people
use, you know, Facebook and Reddit and all of that, as you
(36:59):
know, there. Yeah.
It's crazy because it is not hard to link you to.
Yeah, to link you to that probe.In a couple of the episodes you
guys reference new generation, old generation of swinging and
how they do things. How has that impacted parties
and the website? Hey, the one thing I would
(37:21):
definitely say is, and I just talked about Reddit being this
fucking wild, Wild West Reddit has been great for us.
A lot of people who the real people on Reddit who are like,
all right, we've been doing thison Reddit for six months a year
and playing this game and we found out what CND was.
They love it. They're like, Oh my God, thank
you for fucking saving us. But then there's some people who
(37:41):
are like, no, we're going to stay on this.
This is we're OK with this. We're OK with the level of risk,
but the trade off for it being free.
So we've seen that change, but the Reddit, I have no, nothing
bad to say about Reddit. Reddit is awesome.
But I would say the change that's one of the changes with
the technology piece. I would say the changes that we
see with the coming out to the events piece, we're seeing a lot
(38:04):
more younger people trying it than we did before.
A lot, a lot of younger people are coming out to the events,
you know, just seeing what it's about.
We're getting a lot of differentgroupings of people.
So, you know, we have another episode where we talk about
different races and things like that, but we're seeing a lot of
different racial groups come outthan there were early on.
Yeah, go back and listen to, we've seen a lot of, I think
(38:27):
Miss Doll references. Like we have a big Latino
contingent that, you know, you might walk by the group hanging
out and they only speak in Spanish.
That's their own little area over there or like large Asian
contingents, stuff like that. So that's, that's different just
because when we started this podcast today, I said we started
WC because there wasn't a space for people that look like us as
a couple or couples with, you know, Chucky D and some of our
(38:49):
other friends being around there.
But we're starting to see it nowmore.
So that's one of the, those are some of the bigger changes, you
know the. One thing I want to touch on
with Reddit too is Reddit has been good for us, but I'd say of
all of the free options out there, Reddit is probably one
that carries the most risk as far as exposure as well.
There's really no privacy on Reddit.
(39:10):
I wish a lot of the Reddit usersunderstood those levels of
risks. It's open searchable on Google.
Yeah, I think people don't know any better.
Mike, can you actually explain that a little more about the
security of Reddit and other sites like that?
Well, the big. One to look at Reddit is you.
You might be in a private group,but it's really not that
(39:32):
private. It's still indexed by Google.
You can still do searches and when you create a profile on
there, anyone can look at the profile and see what groups and
such you're part of, even if they're private groups so you
can see what. Groups you're putting straight
fucking pics on Reddit like theyput shit on Reddit.
I was like, let me let me ask this one person here because I
want to know what his Reddit experience is because he knows
(39:53):
nothing. Chuck D what you go on Reddit?
What? What is Reddit?
Reddit I, I, I read, I I go on there, read up on some stuff.
Have you ever posted anything onReddit?
Yeah. Like lifestyle stuff or?
No, not lifestyle stuff. Because he was a big
craigslifter that's why. I thought he was on Reddit too
probably. He's the reason why Craigslist
(40:16):
had to get rid of their personals.
They got rid. Of it because it was too risky
and that Chuck DS the reason. You know.
He's out there with his personalsaying I need someone once a
week during this time frame wearing this outfit with this
color hair and we'll lick my ass, Yeah.
I, I, I think, I think we're outof time people.
(40:40):
I think we're out of time that Iran out of questions.
Well, Mike, I have a suggestion for you.
And then the suggestion would be, you know, don't get in an
argument with the Dean, OK? Because if you do, you end up
like the last guy. Do want to say one thing, Mike?
The professor and I did this to build a community, and we love
(41:03):
our little community that we built.
We really do. Even if no one knows Mike, he
still knows everyone because he's watching you.
I'm watching you. He sees all the.
The time I told you when we met Mike and there was another time
more recently that I, I almost was like, all right, I'm
(41:24):
retiring from this, I'm done. And this was a 2023 and I was
going to be done with the party.And after I decided to stick
around and keep doing it. What happened was I get people
every party now. It's crazy.
Every party since I decided to stay around, someone comes up to
me and tells me a story of how we helped them stand a lifestyle
(41:46):
or how this lifestyle helped them or how C&D helped them.
So it definitely has become to the point now where it's it's
fulfilling to hear, you know, that we help people actually do
this. It's not just about titties and
ass, you know what I mean? They say we found our people.
You know, this is you, this is our people, and thank you.
(42:07):
So David, the producer who sponsored today's episode.
That's couples nextdoor.com, where you can unlock the desires
beyond the ordinary. My favorite lifestyle website
out there. Also, producer.
Where can you listen to today's episode?
All major podcasts because this is a production of the Down and
Dirty Production company and they make sure you hear this
(42:28):
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company? Love Sense.
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And also don't forget those smooth silky sounds by Vic.
Show notes. Show notes.
Go to the damn show notes.
All right, for all you young games out there, if you ain't 18
yet, this ain't your game yet. This is for adults only, and
adults don't take this shit serious.
This is for entertainment, educational purposes only.
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Whether you're curious, kinky Polly, or fully in the
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that you can check out Part 1 also.
We're going to go ahead and bring Mike on so that he can
(01:26):
join in with the professor and the Dean and we can get all of
their perspectives on this as wego forward now.
The producer calls him the GreatOz.
No one sees him. He's just always behind the.
And the guy that no one believesexists?
They all believe it's just a figment of the professor's mind
to blame. It's my lies.
(01:48):
I'll be like, Oh no, my partner didn't.
I I didn't do that. It was him.
And he handles all that that. Could be your screen name, the
great and powerful Oz. Right.
So now we can actually jump to this question where it says what
was the original vision for CND and how close are you to
(02:10):
achieving that or have you achieved it?
Are you guys still trying to like make it better?
Well. I, I would say that it's, you
know, we, we've achieved some ofthe goals we've set out to
achieve, but no side is ever perfect.
As, as time goes by and the industry evolves, there's always
improvements that you're able tomake to make a site better.
(02:32):
You know, our, our primary goal was to make, you know, C&D, not
necessarily a, a, a classified ABS location for swingers.
The goal with it was always to create a community, a place
where people could go and interact in more ways than just,
you know, trying to set up a hookup or, or look at what the
(02:54):
events are. You know, we wanted to create a,
a community so and with that, you know, the the only
communities that were around back then were the online for
the most part was, you know, Facebook and I don't know, was
Myspace around back then? I don't remember.
The AOL chat rooms. Yeah, you know, AOL chat room
(03:14):
was a bomb and screwed the test next day.
Yeah. Chucky D you know.
It's nothing good ever came out of AOL chats.
But we wanted a Facebook for swingers, and that's exactly
what we built and says is we went through two major
iterations since we launched in 2013 and one on the cusp of
(03:36):
another big redesign and launcher within the coming
months. I'm sure you have some questions
about that, Miss Dawlo. Well, you talked about funds.
I would say that is a more perfect question for the site
than it is for our parties, our events.
You know, funds are definitely another story when it comes to
(03:59):
the website. And I mean, if we had unlimited
funds, if we would have a bomb website that had no issues at
all ever, right, Mike? Yes, I would.
Yeah, yeah. So.
You know, we do the best we can with the budget we have.
We try to give our, our members the best bang for the buck and
we were on a relatively large website for a relatively modest
(04:24):
amount of money. And you know, we, we started
seeing, do you think with what, 500 bucks back in 2013?
And you know, and we, we built it and modified it and groomed
it into what it is today. And they'll be more grooming as
time goes on. I.
(04:44):
Think people, what people have to realize is that we've been
around for a while, but initially like they were saying
it was more just, it was, it wasa community for us here in this
area and it's, it's grown. It's not like it's, it's more
organic. We didn't set it out like
there's some bigger websites whothey targeted all these
different areas and that was their goal to get into other
places. That wasn't what we set out for
(05:05):
initially. Even with the WC part, you know,
we initially started with parties just for a space for our
group. Then it was a community.
And then now we're, we're starting to evolve where it's
the community, but the communityis growing.
Like you see it. There's different states coming
involved, different major areas coming involved.
So the community is growing where that's that's going to be
something that people are. And we're already getting
(05:26):
people. We see people like the producer
and I know Mike sees people complaining sometimes about, oh,
we got all these new people coming in.
I don't feel like I want to put my pictures up right, All these
new people. I'm like, well, this is what
some of you complain about, thatyou wanted to get bigger and go
to more states than it is now that it's in.
So we're already seeing the growing pains of you want more
(05:49):
people, but you don't want the problems or whatever that, you
know, having new people kind of bring.
That was important thing you touched on was the organic
growth. So that was that was the
decision we made way back in thevery beginning is we made the
decision to not be indexed by large search engines.
We wanted the growth of CND to be organic for the most people
(06:09):
telling other people to join thesite.
If you were not familiar with CND, we were not the easiest to
find online and that was by choice because we, we know and
we've seen with other sites thatmight be bigger than us do not
necessarily have the demographics that we have.
And we wanted to try to keep things as balanced and keep the
(06:31):
site focused on, you know, couples and their lifestyle.
It's affected growth, but I think we've been able to provide
a much higher quality site as a result of that.
So would you guys say that when you started out you were looking
at producing a website for information or were you looking
(06:51):
to build a community? Definitely community.
Community. You had to do with information.
I got a question for you. This is one of my favorite ones.
How do you guys handle things like conflict?
You know, consent issues or or violations?
OK, like someone who has a complaint, right?
Rock Paper. Scissors fun that GPT.
(07:14):
No, you know what? My assistant.
My assistant handles that. But you know what, I'll talk
from a party standpoint, like anevent standpoint.
We've had some serious issues inthe last probably a couple years
come up. You know, when I say serious
issues like, you know, harm or, you know, authorities can get
involved, stuff like that, wherewe've had to take these things
(07:36):
under serious advisement. And you know, we don't take a
lot of that stuff lightly. And if there has to be a point
where we've had words send people to the authorities, we
have to. But there's also things that
come up that don't have like it's not cut and dry where you
got to make AI don't know if it's a moral decision, you would
say, but it's it's a lifestyle decision where, you know, I want
(07:58):
to give you an example without getting into it, but there's
there's times that you have to make a decision based off of
lifestyle rules. Basically, you know what, I'm, I
hope you can understand what I'msaying without me going to
specific examples. But we have to make decisions
sometimes where it's like there's not an answer for it,
but we have to come up with the best for the community.
So there's a lot of different ways.
(08:18):
Sometimes we handle it with, youknow, you got to go to the
authorities for that. This is serious enough for that.
Or there's sometimes where I have to be the bad guy, so to
speak. A lot of times I have to be the
bad guy. There's some of you guys who
fucking probably hate me for stuff because I used to make him
hate Chucky D for stuff at the parties.
I would make him go tell people to fucking.
Bad news and I did not mind doing it.
(08:41):
But my greatest Chucky D bad news story was there was a
single male who who wanted to come to the party and we and for
whatever reason, I don't remember what the reason was,
Chuck, but we were like, no, he's not fucking getting in.
And I wasn't at the door. But later Chuck comes up to me
and goes, yeah, you know, he tried to get in, right?
And I said, no, what did you tell him?
(09:02):
He goes, oh, guess what I told him.
He goes in his pocket. He pulls out a lot of money like
a little kid, like a 5 year old.It was balled up.
There was like coins in it and shit.
There was a dollar bill on the outside.
And he puts it in my hand and I go, what is this?
He goes $17.00 and 63 fucking cents.
I was like, I was like, why do you have this?
He goes, that's all he had on him.
(09:22):
He tried to sneak in the party, he said that's all he had on
him. So I took it.
Hey, he's lucky I didn't kick him out, OK?
Yeah, he loved doing that shit. Loved it so that.
Kind of plays into the next one.The next question that pops up
is how do you support newcomers who are nervous or unsure of
where to start? At our, at our events or on the.
(09:45):
On the site. Say the site.
We don't 'cause we already talked about the event.
There's no, there's no site sortof orientation.
I would say the best advice I give new people are post, get
involved. You know what I mean?
Like make comments, post pictures of yourself.
Don't just be a lurker like fucking Chucky D over there.
If you. No one's going to know who you
(10:07):
are, what you're looking for, get involved.
That's what I say for newcomers.Like I know you're probably
nervous and you're thinking, oh,this is stupid.
But if you want people to look at your profile, send you a
message, want to meet at a party, they're going to want to
see something that's just the way it is.
And you can be hot as all hell, but no one's going to know it
unless you post it out there. So that's that's my advice for
(10:27):
newcomers. You should also advise on how to
pick the right screen name. What are the screen names that
the professor absolutely hates? Or that there are 50 million of
them? There's a lot of.
People in that role of that Mike, what it what do you think,
Mike? Let's ask Mike this question.
He would know what is the most common name in the database for
(10:51):
for users. I would have to say some
variation of couple. Fun.
Fun. Sexy.
Fun couple. Fun fun.
Sexy new company. There's a lot of MN something.
Curious. Lot of curious.
Curious what else? Let's see, there's the shy.
(11:15):
That one's been a recent one lately.
Shy. I hate that one too.
I would say to. Do a query on that.
Yeah, we're going to do a poll on that.
Fun's probably, yeah. We should do what's the most
common single feel Single, single female.
What single female and single male cause the single?
Males. Single males.
Probably lately. Lately, it's Bowl.
(11:37):
Shaggy D What was Shaggy D talking about?
He a boy over there. What do you say?
What do you say? If Chucky D signed up today, it
would just be a wall full of hisbig old slong hanging it out
because that's how they do it now.
He'd just be out there flapping it around.
The new the new site should havelike a something on it for new
(11:59):
people that are, you know, signing up.
Yeah, Mike, get on there a. Name or something?
I mean, that would be kind of handy, yeah.
Or a. Name Exam.
Yeah, nothing. No, they got to.
This is like the first day of school.
You got to fight through this awkwardness.
You got to get through it on your own.
There's 1. You get 1 reprieve.
You get a chance to change it. But I think we don't let that's.
(12:21):
Hard for people It's hard for people, members The three names.
Are for. Use of C&D can change their
username under settings. See, you get one.
Everybody gets one. Peter.
Look, I would say let them fightthrough this.
Let them fuck this first one up and then you their one magic
change. We all need to go.
(12:43):
You know which ones are changingtheir username before their
weekly trial even ends. You're like, they sign up and
you're like, they're definitely connecting soon.
They're definitely changing thatsoon.
Especially the ones that sign upwith their real names.
Yeah, Aaron, Yeah. OK, the other one, the other
(13:04):
ones that I enjoy too are the ones that like they put the
picture of themselves as their profile and then like 3 or 4
scrolls. On 3/4 wall clicks.
Then you have like the heart, their faces like covered, but
you. Won't change it like 3 or 4.
Those are hilarious. And they're like, their face is
(13:26):
covered now. It's like, got you.
We didn't start there. You'll see them through the 1st
wall when they'll be like they'll put their first name out
there like Brent Rogers. Like what you know, Speaking of
that, one of the questions they had out there is how do you
maintain privacy and discretion for members both online and in
person? But let's talk about online.
(13:48):
Online you read the fucking rules and that's your profile
settings properly. People do that shit.
We just had someone on the wall the other day, like had a
security breach or whatever. Lo and behold, went in and like
they have it all registered to all.
They didn't even try to set the setting.
You want to do friend to friend.Mike, how often is it like when
there's a complaint? Is it user?
(14:10):
What's it called? User error?
Yeah, user error. 1. 110%. Of the.
Time we're testing or messaging yeah user.
And of those 110 times, how manyof those are the professors?
We had one guy, we had one guy swear up and down when he was
(14:30):
hacked, right? He said.
One guy kept saying he was hacked.
We was on the fucking horn. Like you sure, let's check this
shit out. So we was looking and Mike looks
it up and he's like the IP is coming from in your house.
His fucking wife was on his side, on his.
(14:51):
I can't tell you how many times we've been accused of being
hacked and we're hacked. It's like we're not hacked.
You just you need to talk to theother the other half here
couple. Fucking same house, yeah.
So have we, have you ever had that where you know, I hear
companies getting hacked, peoplegetting into their into the
(15:15):
system. So it has C&D ever had that
before? No.
So we, we've never had any breach of any sort.
We, we take pretty extreme lengths to protect the identity
and privacy, privacy of of our members.
We don't even handle actually any of the billing ourselves.
We actually utilize third party companies for billing.
(15:41):
Yeah, we've all been mad ACC Bill before.
So it has its challenges, but ultimately that that's their
core competency. That's what CC Bill does is just
payment processing. So when a member enters in any
of their personal information, whether it be credit card
information, etcetera, CND, we don't actually see that
information. We don't host that information,
(16:01):
We don't store that information.That's all stored with CC to
bill our payment partner so we never have to worry about that
information being at risk on what's funny.
What's funny? They're laughing at me.
I'm trying to make sure my camera see what these fucks are
doing. They're all kind of fun of me
(16:24):
because I'm moving my camera. What the hell?
Keep checking the camera angles,you don't got my good size.
It is so good we are. Not video broadcasting got that
foreheads big you, you don't need to expose it.
(16:46):
So let's let's kind of get into that, Mike, let's talk more
about the analytics. You know, how many, how many
members are active right now on the site, would you say?
Well, I don't want to give firm numbers, but I'll I'll say that
the active members over let's say a 30 day period where
someone logs in, you know, it's it wouldn't be unheard of to see
(17:09):
10,000 members log in over a onemonth period.
I didn't know there was. I remember we have people that
go away and what people don't understand is like in the
lifestyle, we have one person. We, we have, well, we have a
couple people that will sign up and they'll go away and like,
oh, I'm breaking up this week and then next week they're back.
(17:30):
So it happens every fucking week.
So three months span you got people that are logging and
logging out maybe 2-3 times. So you don't know, people will
have an inactive profile. People like, oh, there's only
inactive profiles on there. That person will be back in six
fucking months. Just wait, wait around.
(17:50):
They'll be coming back around the fucking mountain every time.
Or you have active members that only log in every couple months.
Like they're still out there, but they're just out there.
They're busy with their family or doing things.
Yeah, Well, you. Don't seem to remember too is
very high percentage of our profiles are couples.
So every profile there's two active members, you know, for
(18:11):
the most part. So you, you have a, you know, we
can clearly see it often on different profiles where there's
two different people logging in from, you know, the same
profile. So.
That's the same thing with events too.
People will see on our listing for events, you'll see like 300
on there. That's not 300 people, that's
300 profiles. So go by that, not the number
(18:33):
of, that's not the number of people.
It doesn't count people. So when you see like what I just
see the Spring Mansion party is 180.
So that's 180 profiles, not 180 people.
Interesting. Do you guys keep track of how
many members use C&D mobile versus on a computer?
80 to 85% are visiting from a mobile device.
(18:53):
I was going. To say I very I very rarely log
in on that laptop or because I forget about it.
Well, I'm I'm in the other direction.
I never I don't have the mobile app.
I didn't know you guys had one. I just do the controller.
We. Don't have a mobile app?
That's the sore subject. But it's a good subject.
(19:16):
Mike. Why?
Doesn't CNT have a mobile app? You know that that is a great
question and I find myself asking myself that why do we not
have a mobile app? And the simple answer to that is
because Google and Apple do not like our content with the
content that we have on our site.
If we were to have a mobile app,we would not be able to have the
(19:38):
wall and have albums. Well, we could have the wall, we
just wouldn't be able display any images containing any sort
of nude. Nights, gift pics and fucking
pics you like to see. We can't have that.
Yeah, so. A lot of people don't realize is
that because it's an adult website, it's actually
considered pornography to the web or World Wide Web.
(20:02):
C&D is considered an. Adult to the interweb, we are
porn. To the interweb, so we.
Are putting your little kid up there on fucking quad.
Don't post you on your fucking cool horse or your snake wrapped
around your puss because that's bestiality.
Stop doing it. No dog pigs, No cat pigs.
(20:22):
None of it. Yes, to the real world we are
considered an adult content website, so we we are plagued by
the rules and restrictions that come with that so so it's.
Not dandy, it's it applies to all swinger sites.
Yes, and some others have tried to do it and they have created
(20:43):
apps and again, those apps weren't able to show content
here, they're watered down. Versions.
Yes, they're very watered down and when you click try to click
on an image on there, it would take you off the app to to the
website and then you have to re log in to try to look at that
that image. It just was not a good user
experience. So we've tried to always create
(21:04):
a very mobile friendly website and to come you're going to see
some enhancements in US adoptingsome additional technologies
that will will make the mobile experience even more closely
resemble an app, a native app oneither Android or.
Apple, do you use apps though? Let's be honest.
(21:26):
Honestly, do you use apps? I do, while we were just talking
about this, I just used my door dash app so I can get dinner
tonight. My hotel, okay.
I'm out here in the country, they don't have DoorDash and I'm
so sad. Does xhamster have okay?
I don't know that's why I'm asking.
(21:46):
I don't use that shit unless they forced me to use it.
That's why I asked you. I don't use that.
I know you don't change. Like pictures or update your
contacts. So wait.
No, I have 10,000 contacts in myphone.
I refuse to update. If you get a new phone number,
don't fucking send it to me. All right?
Just we won't talk anymore. I'm not updating shit.
I'm not editing. Just.
(22:08):
Asking for your phone and I'll just update it myself.
You just. Put it in yourself, because I'm
not doing it. So let's talk about your
retention rate. Do you guys know what what that
looks like right now? Well.
Retention rate can be measured in several different metrics.
How long a member is on the site?
Whether someone converts from a trial member to a paid member.
(22:28):
What exactly you're referring to?
I don't know. Somebody asked that question.
I'm just. Asking.
The point it. Looks like I don't know I would.
Say I would say the general fromlike when they switch over to a
paid. What I can say is that our
retention rate is equal to or better than the industry
standards. For lifestyle sites, you're
(22:49):
saying? For lifestyle websites.
OK, so I can say the same. These questions were provided by
members of C&D. And I think what they're trying
to get to is what is the lifestyle turnover and how does
that compare to C&D? But I mean, every time you go to
an event, 60% of that crowd is brand new.
(23:09):
So the turnover in the lifestyleperiod is high, but a lot of
those people are sitting out there in the lurking in the site
and meeting people in the back and they're just not always
coming to every single party. So I'd say C&D is bigger than it
appears by just what's on the wall.
Yeah, because if you're on bigger sites, you're getting
people from the Internet now, you're getting a lot of single
(23:30):
males, you're getting a lot of fluff, you're getting a lot of
that. When you come to C&D, if you
actually go to the events, you're going to actually meet
the real people, the people thatactually doing it on those other
places. I think if you see on, I see on,
I ain't going to name it, but there's one that says it gives
you the hourly update or people that signed up today or this
week and have like a astronomical number.
(23:51):
If you dug into those profiles on there, because I have before,
I was like, those are garbage profiles.
There's their garbage profiles. If you see some oh, 10,000 today
signed up or whatever this week signed up their garbage profile.
If you come to CND when you go to events, I can say this, I, I
don't browse sites anymore, so Ican't speak to that.
(24:12):
But if you go to events from it,you're going to find way more
real people at our events than you are that sign up or that you
see on this other larger site. I can I can tell you.
That well that ties back to whatI was originally saying about
the organic growth CND yes, we could.
We could do things to make this site grow much quicker, but a
(24:33):
high percentage of those profiles would be worthless
profiles. Mike, you have had countless
conversations over the years about.
Like many, many countries. Where it's like all right, do we
flip the fucking faucet on or dowe keep it the way we keep it?
Because once you flip the fauceton you become the site that you
all fucking talk shit on that you're like, oh it's gross on
there. We either become that or we
(24:54):
think of a new way of working around it.
So it's always been a challenge of seeing.
So I mean the industry standard is realistically 3 to four
months for when a new member comes on till they're gone.
I will tell people three months is is what what you're looking.
At and and we are better than that, you know, not by, you
know, hundreds of percent, but our ours is better than that.
(25:15):
But then the the people that we tend to keep the longest are
actually the couples. And that's that.
That's what the goal of CND is, to keep the couples.
Like I was just going to say, I said if you if you are looking
for single females and you see one pop up, you have three days.
All right, you have three days. You have three days, but keep in
mind that poor woman just had 50messages thrown at her in one
(25:40):
hour. I get the damn first, but you
guys have three days, OK? How do you guys verify it's a
it's a female? A single female what?
Are you talking about how we. Verify.
How do you verify? How do you know it's not some
creeper coming on holding? Out A tag team lurking in the
background. Is that what you're saying?
Stop, man. I don't know.
(26:00):
What you're talking about? How do we know it's not A tag
team? Everyone go to tag team profile
right now. Unfriended.
Got lots of friends. We don't need to verify single
females. You got that three day period.
If they're real, there's very few real ones that stay around
(26:21):
past the trial period. So we can't verify that, but it
verifies itself. You know I mean.
It could be a male on there creeping as a single female.
Just like the couple could be a single male or a female.
I mean, maybe, maybe the better question is how does the
community verify itself? Because I think.
(26:42):
That's community. Is that the verification comes
through talking to the people and it like the people that say,
well, we didn't really message anyone.
We didn't talk to anyone. So we never really feel like we
were part of the site. Well, well, that's why because
they didn't know whether you're real or not.
You didn't post, you didn't comment, you didn't send
messages. I don't know how many times
(27:04):
people just can tell like we get.
People all the time that are saying.
Like, I'm pretty sure that's nota real.
I mean, the community policies itself.
And usually it's, it's us just taking action based on on the
community policing itself, though they'll, they'll let us
know when, hey, this profile doesn't look right.
And at that point we're able to look into it and see, yeah,
yeah, something doesn't look right here.
(27:26):
And. Recently viewed single male and
you see me on there. I'm on that ass, all right?
You know who's going to be the troublemakers?
I'm on that ass. And we have moderators that
moderate and try to those fake profiles out.
If we suspect an issue, we can ask for various types of
(27:47):
verification from them to verifywho they are.
You've got a lot of you work forthe fucking FBI.
You got a lot of questions. We're not done yet.
Hey the community had a lot of questions and I only gave them
an hour advance notice to this and we that's how many questions
(28:09):
we got. It's sitting on it.
Yeah, look. Let's let's step back to 2020,
some of our listings. Oh shit, this sounds specific.
What I'm? Doing 02020, we had COVID,
right? COVID.
I want to know how did that affect the C&D community and the
event planning. We tried to make the site fun
(28:31):
for people because we knew that everybody was just sitting at
home. So we would start doing, you
know, different picture days anddifferent.
It was kind of hard to do giveaways because usually our
giveaways are, you know, partiesand stuff like that.
Then we weren't having parties because we weren't allowed, but
(28:55):
you know, we tried to just make it more fun and, and have
different themes for different days.
And, you know, today, wear your favorite red or wear your
favorite, you know, leather. It was the longest picture theme
contest of all time. We did like it was by the week,
like by the month. It was crazy.
(29:16):
But now the story I was going totell, I thought you were going
to tell is that year it was Mardi Gras was the party, right?
So it's February, Mardi Gras wasthe party.
And everybody like this shit wasstarting to happen.
Like that little ticker up on the corner, left corner of your
screen that was counting bodies in Washington and shit.
It was low at first when Mardi Gras was popping.
(29:36):
So we had over like 500 people signed up ready to come.
And then it started getting moreserious.
Like he started seeing like it got him to the 100 thousands on
the number for COVID. And everyone was like, damn,
what are we doing? No one's made an official call
on it yet. So finally we had to make the
decision. And even the hotel was not
giving us guidance on it. The hotel wasn't saying like,
oh, you guys got to cancel it. They were just like, it's up to
(30:00):
you. It's up to you.
The CDC hasn't said anything yet.
And finally we said, you know what, just for the sake of
everyone's well-being and everything, shit, ours too,
we're going to cancel it. We got so many messages from
people because no one was canceling.
Everyone was staying like they're attending.
We got so many messages from people going thank you, man.
(30:21):
Thank you for making that decision for us because we
didn't know what to do and we were going to show up and go to
this super spreader event or whatever.
Everybody was. I got, I can't tell you how many
people said thank you for us making that decision for them.
But the next event would have been Halloween.
We did Halloween that year and it was dull.
The weird rules where you had the you had the mask on, take a
(30:44):
sip of your drink, put the mask back on.
So we had to like go around and regulate that.
The hotel made us like check to make sure people wasn't drinking
or partying without a mask on. COVID was weird.
It was basically a lost year in the, in the lifestyle itself.
It was, it was a lost year, but there was a lot of events and a
lot of things that didn't come back from COVID.
I think there was a period wherewe were sort of like we survived
(31:06):
COVID obviously because we kept having parties, but it it wasn't
until maybe a whole year later until the parties sort of
bounced back. During COVID or were there any
positives that came out of it? Stimulus check.
I don't know. Look, I don't know nothing
really like, I mean from. These standpoint we saw a pretty
significant increase in, you know, interactions on the site.
(31:31):
Yeah, people don't know. Interaction.
I mean, we did see. Parties and.
Shit, damn, I wasn't invited. Jackass.
We have a question that came up about if Minneapolis relaxed its
regulations, would you ever consider opening a private sex
club or physical venue? And I think the, the Dean and I
were aligned on this, but I'll get her answer after I answer.
But I would say no, just given our history with clubs.
(31:53):
But we, we started in club and travel around the club.
But they're cool. I, I like going to clubs, but as
far as a business goes, you got to think of a, to me, a swing
club is just like a VFW or the Legion.
Every weekend you go there and it's all Jimmy and Susan's going
to get in a fight tonight and Tommy's drunk again and it's the
same mother fucker. It's only when they have a DJ in
(32:14):
or it's the holiday party or theHalloween party where you're
going to see new people. Otherwise, the first two to
three weeks of the club are going to be the same people and
then there's one event a month, just like you would come here to
a hotel party that's bigger and there's going to be new people.
That's that's sort of my view onthe clubs.
The Dean how do you feel about it?
How is that different from our current parties and events?
No. But I'm saying we only have them
(32:35):
once a month, so people have to pick and choose when they're
going to come or they're going if you had a club.
Once a month versus every singleweekend.
Go every single. Fucking week.
OK, I. See, yeah, I don't want to go
see Tommy and Susan fight every fucking Friday, you know what I
mean? Like the same 20 people.
That's what some clubs become after a while.
Where you see C&D in the next five years?
(32:57):
Mike, you answer that one. I'll let Mike.
Answer many improvements to existing features and then we
will be adding additional features over the next 12 months
as well. The the site for the most part
is under a complete redesign andit's, it's, it's going to be
exciting. It just takes some time, but.
Well, you're teasing us now. What?
(33:18):
What? What are some of the the new
features? Yeah, I'll talk, talk about a
few, so. Yeah, Mike, don't give these
motherfuckers too much. Go ahead geek, I'll give him a
few give. Him.
A. Tease though.
One thing we're going to have iswe're going to have story.
Oh, that sounds like some new people too.
(33:40):
Young. What is that for old?
People that short videos and forthe younger ones that's what
they call reals. It's going to see some
enhancements in the photos and videos.
Actually, when you click on a video, it actually plays a
video. Yes, we'll be able to utilize a
lot. Of for me, I don't know what
other people are watching because that.
Is going on with that Mike? Why does that happen?
(34:02):
A lot of it has to do with the different codecs that are being
used nowadays for videos. I mean, Apple will use their own
type of codecs and Android will use another type and different
variations of either each of them.
So when someone uploads a video to CND, we have to take whatever
video they have and the codec they're using and then transcode
(34:24):
that video into another version.That should be compatible with
most browsers, but that that isn't always the case.
So let me interpret that please do.
That means basically CND has to take that video, do a bunch of
shit to it, and then redisplay it in a sense.
So basically stop shooting y'allshit on the wrong stuff and then
(34:46):
we could all jerk off to it. Is that what you're saying,
David? Yes, yes, definitely.
Post pictures and GIFs. That's it.
Skip the video is. It GIFs or GIFs though?
Is it GIFs or GIFs with? I call them GIFs.
I don't know. Say GIFs over the last 10 years
we've seen for the evolution of other platforms.
So you have Facebook and you have Instagram, even fucking
(35:09):
TikTok now, and the big one is Reddit where you'll see these
other places where people are going to for sort of a free
option and they're like, Oh, I can do this here.
But what I tell people all the time is a lot of those places
are closed where one, if it's ifit's a Facebook group, you're
not getting organically new people coming in, new people
going to events. You still have to actually go to
(35:31):
actual site or something to signup for events, right?
It's a little different Reddit. I still don't really under
fucking stand Reddit all the way.
It's sort of a wild, Wild West lot going on on there, but a lot
of new people are coming from there.
But it's so unsecure. It's just so I don't know.
I don't, I don't fuck with it, but a lot of people do.
But what I'm saying is, is what we've seen over the last 10
(35:52):
years is that people going to free options, free group, but
still having to come back when they really want to do lifestyle
stuff, go to lifestyle parties. They still have to come to the
paid website and the last time Ichecked, our website cost was
cheaper than a cup of coffee. Y'all buy a Starbuck Caribou
this and that. Why not go somewhere where you
can see everybody who's going tothe event in one place or you
can talk to people in real time and not worry about picture
(36:14):
stealing and whatever else you worry about on Reddit and
Facebook and those other places.But that's a challenge.
I think that challenge gets bigger for us going forward
where you're seeing a lot of thepay site you we don't see a lot
as many as we did before, a lot of new pay sites popping up, but
a lot of the same pay sites are around.
But they're all, we're all challenged by the Facebooks and
(36:35):
Reddits of the world. So the next five years is that's
that's part of the war for us. If you're not paying for it, you
are the product. So Facebook isn't making money
off you, but it's selling your data.
So you pay for C&D because C&D isn't selling your data to other
places. It blows my mind that people
use, you know, Facebook and Reddit and all of that, as you
(36:59):
know, there. Yeah.
It's crazy because it is not hard to link you to.
Yeah, to link you to that probe.In a couple of the episodes you
guys reference new generation, old generation of swinging and
how they do things. How has that impacted parties
and the website? Hey, the one thing I would
(37:21):
definitely say is, and I just talked about Reddit being this
fucking wild, Wild West Reddit has been great for us.
A lot of people who the real people on Reddit who are like,
all right, we've been doing thison Reddit for six months a year
and playing this game and we found out what CND was.
They love it. They're like, Oh my God, thank
you for fucking saving us. But then there's some people who
(37:41):
are like, no, we're going to stay on this.
This is we're OK with this. We're OK with the level of risk,
but the trade off for it being free.
So we've seen that change, but the Reddit, I have no, nothing
bad to say about Reddit. Reddit is awesome.
But I would say the change that's one of the changes with
the technology piece. I would say the changes that we
see with the coming out to the events piece, we're seeing a lot
(38:04):
more younger people trying it than we did before.
A lot, a lot of younger people are coming out to the events,
you know, just seeing what it's about.
We're getting a lot of differentgroupings of people.
So, you know, we have another episode where we talk about
different races and things like that, but we're seeing a lot of
different racial groups come outthan there were early on.
Yeah, go back and listen to, we've seen a lot of, I think
(38:27):
Miss Doll references. Like we have a big Latino
contingent that, you know, you might walk by the group hanging
out and they only speak in Spanish.
That's their own little area over there or like large Asian
contingents, stuff like that. So that's, that's different just
because when we started this podcast today, I said we started
WC because there wasn't a space for people that look like us as
a couple or couples with, you know, Chucky D and some of our
(38:49):
other friends being around there.
But we're starting to see it nowmore.
So that's one of the, those are some of the bigger changes, you
know the. One thing I want to touch on
with Reddit too is Reddit has been good for us, but I'd say of
all of the free options out there, Reddit is probably one
that carries the most risk as far as exposure as well.
There's really no privacy on Reddit.
(39:10):
I wish a lot of the Reddit usersunderstood those levels of
risks. It's open searchable on Google.
Yeah, I think people don't know any better.
Mike, can you actually explain that a little more about the
security of Reddit and other sites like that?
Well, the big. One to look at Reddit is you.
You might be in a private group,but it's really not that
(39:32):
private. It's still indexed by Google.
You can still do searches and when you create a profile on
there, anyone can look at the profile and see what groups and
such you're part of, even if they're private groups so you
can see what. Groups you're putting straight
fucking pics on Reddit like theyput shit on Reddit.
I was like, let me let me ask this one person here because I
want to know what his Reddit experience is because he knows
(39:53):
nothing. Chuck D what you go on Reddit?
What? What is Reddit?
Reddit I, I, I read, I I go on there, read up on some stuff.
Have you ever posted anything onReddit?
Yeah. Like lifestyle stuff or?
No, not lifestyle stuff. Because he was a big
craigslifter that's why. I thought he was on Reddit too
probably. He's the reason why Craigslist
(40:16):
had to get rid of their personals.
They got rid. Of it because it was too risky
and that Chuck DS the reason. You know.
He's out there with his personalsaying I need someone once a
week during this time frame wearing this outfit with this
color hair and we'll lick my ass, Yeah.
I, I, I think, I think we're outof time people.
(40:40):
I think we're out of time that Iran out of questions.
Well, Mike, I have a suggestion for you.
And then the suggestion would be, you know, don't get in an
argument with the Dean, OK? Because if you do, you end up
like the last guy. Do want to say one thing, Mike?
The professor and I did this to build a community, and we love
(41:03):
our little community that we built.
We really do. Even if no one knows Mike, he
still knows everyone because he's watching you.
I'm watching you. He sees all the.
The time I told you when we met Mike and there was another time
more recently that I, I almost was like, all right, I'm
(41:24):
retiring from this, I'm done. And this was a 2023 and I was
going to be done with the party.And after I decided to stick
around and keep doing it. What happened was I get people
every party now. It's crazy.
Every party since I decided to stay around, someone comes up to
me and tells me a story of how we helped them stand a lifestyle
(41:46):
or how this lifestyle helped them or how C&D helped them.
So it definitely has become to the point now where it's it's
fulfilling to hear, you know, that we help people actually do
this. It's not just about titties and
ass, you know what I mean? They say we found our people.
You know, this is you, this is our people, and thank you.
(42:07):
So David, the producer who sponsored today's episode.
That's couples nextdoor.com, where you can unlock the desires
beyond the ordinary. My favorite lifestyle website
out there. Also, producer.
Where can you listen to today's episode?
All major podcasts because this is a production of the Down and
Dirty Production company and they make sure you hear this
(42:28):
episode. And what is our favorite toy
company? Love Sense.
Remote control gods over there get you 1.
And also don't forget those smooth silky sounds by Vic.
Show notes. Show notes.
Go to the damn show notes.
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