October 7, 2024 • 21 mins
Welcome to another emotionally impactful episode of The Finally Healed Podcast with Jessica Lundy! In this episode, Jessica delves deep into her mental health journey, shares her challenges, and discusses the importance of self-care and mental well-being. Prepare to get real, raw, and vulnerable as we explore the broader aspects of mental health, the significance of reaching out for support, and practical steps to prioritize your healing journey.
Episode Highlights:
- The true essence of mental health beyond disorders.
- Jessica’s personal experience with depression, anxiety, and finding her way through college.
- The importance of vulnerability and transparency in healing.
- Practical self-care tips and the necessity of setting boundaries.
- The evolving societal approach to mental health and the value of community support.
Resources Mentioned:
- Better Sleep app for quality rest and relaxation.
- The Calm app and other mental health tools.
- Moodfit app for daily mental health check-ins.
- BetterHelp for finding licensed therapists. (Get your first week free)
Join us as Jessica, an international motivational speaker, mental health advocate, and America’s Big Sister, extends her heartfelt support, actionable advice, and a mission to help you heal.
Healing Moment Action Item: Create a system for checking in with your mental health daily, using tools like the Moodfit app for a comprehensive approach to well-being.
Stay Connected: Follow us on Instagram: @finallyhealpod 📩 DM Jessica directly for support, encouragement, and to share your journey.
Don't forget to subscribe and leave us a 5-star review if you found this episode valuable. Share it with friends and family who might benefit from these insights.
Remember, you’ve got this. We need you! 💖
Support and Resources:
- Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741
- National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255
Subscribe to The Finally Healed Podcast for more heartfelt episodes and join us on this journey of healing and self-discovery!
Join the Waitlist for our end-of-the-year event Elevate & Thrive in 2025. https://jessicalundy.com/workshop/
RESOURCES
Jessica Lundy
Connect with Jessica on Instagram @jessicalundytv and follow the Podcast @FinallyHealedPod.
Needs some extra motivation? I got you. Start your day with the 'Wake Up and Win Audio Affirmations' and have Jessica as your personal cheerleader. Get Your Copy Today.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Jessica Lundy (00:00):
If you are someone who feels like you have
been struggling with your mentalhealth, with your well-being,
it's okay to ask for help.
That uncomfortability levelsaved my life.
Once a week goes by whereyou're like really struggling,
that next week rolls around andyou're still in the same state.
(00:20):
That means something has tochange.
You need to reach out forsupport because you don't have
to do this alone.
So I don't want you to feellike there is not a solution for
you.
We need you.
(00:54):
Welcome to another episode ofFinally Healed with Jessica
Lundy podcast, where weprioritize mental health,
self-care and embracing ourhealing journey together.
Now for this episode, you mightneed to get your tissue okay,
your Kleenex out, because thisone is going to be emotional.
I'm going to be talking aboutmental health, breaking down my
(01:16):
mental health journey and whyit's been important to me and
I'm truly going to challenge youon this episode to get real, to
get raw and to get vulnerableand to meet me with the level of
transparency that I'm going togive you.
So let's start talking aboutwhat mental health is and isn't.
(01:38):
A lot of times when people hearthe word mental health, they
instantly think about disorders,right?
They think about depression oranxiety or bipolar, or
schizophrenia.
They constantly think aboutthis.
In actuality, self-care issomething that we do on a daily
basis, right?
(01:58):
So it does have to do with thepsychology, it does have to do
with the social skills, it doeshave to do with our everyday
interaction with people, on howwe handle our conversations, how
we think about ourselves.
It's much more of a broaderumbrella than how much we really
narrow it down.
And so when I think aboutmental health and how important
(02:21):
it is, a lot of times I do kindof couple it with mental health,
with wellness, with burnout,self-care and self-love, because
I feel like they are allintertwined and equally as
important.
And when I think about mymental health journey, it has
been a journey.
When I was a senior in highschool, I was diagnosed with
(02:46):
depression and anxiety and itwas challenging.
My senior year in high schoolwas really one of the hardest
years of my life.
I was already getting ready totransition from high school to
college, which is already a lotand then finding out that
diagnosis was really challenging.
Prior to that, I was popular, Iwas a cheerleader, I was super
(03:09):
active, but once I had an injuryan injury that actually
happened when I was 11 years oldwhere I fell backwards on
cement with the too heavy of abackpack, sidebar to all my
educators.
Students' backpacks should notbe that heavy, but my backpack
was 50 pounds and it permanentlydamaged my back.
(03:31):
We went to see every specialistknown to man.
I'm originally from Michigan,so U of M Hospital was trying
everything on me until my senioryear in high school.
I was in excruciating pain fromsunup to sundown, so they gave
me an experimental drug thatwould help change the way I
perceive pain.
What they did not tell me wasthe laundry list of side effects
(03:54):
and would you believe that Iended up getting all of them,
which led to a really bad, longextent of depression, severe
depression, anxiety, suicidalthoughts and really took me to a
dark place where my personalitychanged, my identity changed
(04:14):
and now I had to get ready forcollege.
And college was a challengingtime for me because I was trying
to figure out who I am as aperson and then who I am as a
person with mental illness or amental disorder, and I think it
was challenging because I didn'thave family support.
Now let me take that back.
(04:36):
My family was understanding.
The church family that I was apart of, was not really ready to
have some of those difficultconversations.
So if you are someone who feelslike you have been struggling
with your mental health, withyour well-being, it's okay to
(04:58):
ask for help.
It's okay to be vulnerable.
I remember being vulnerable ata time where I could tell it was
kind of making my friends andfamily uncomfortable.
But what I realized is thatuncomfortability level saved my
life.
Telling people that I wanted totake my own life, telling
(05:18):
people that I was superdepressed and didn't want to get
out of the bed and somethingwas wrong with me, allowed me to
have the accountability that Ineeded to sit here on this couch
today.
So if you know me as aninternational motivational
speaker or you've seen mespeaking to college students,
this is why I'm so passionateabout it, because if I didn't
(05:41):
embrace the healing journey, ifI didn't put my mental health as
my top priority, I would not beable to travel around the world
and help and heal people.
I would not have the type ofconviction that I have to share
the importance of the copingstrategies that I teach.
(06:01):
I am a huge advocate of beingsomeone that, if you've been
through something, you've beenthrough some trauma, you've been
through some brokenness.
You've been through a lot.
I believe that happens to somepeople that are so brave that
will one day share theexperience so that I can
actually help and heal people.
(06:21):
And so I am on this mission,right.
That was one of the reasons Istarted this podcast because I
want you to heal Now.
I don't want you to hear thename Finally Healed and think
that I have arrived right, thatmy healing journey is over.
I have a therapy appointmentscheduled this week.
Okay.
I remember my therapist triedto fire herself.
(06:44):
She told me that I was.
I was so healed and I didn'tneed a therapist anymore and I
said, lady, I will see you nextweek.
Okay, because healing issomething that we have to
constantly keep doing.
We don't know what trauma isaround the corner in our lives.
So it's important to have atherapist, it's important to
have a counselor.
I want you to do yourself afavor and make sure you have the
(07:08):
support that you deserve tohave.
It can be so easy to dump onyour friends.
I have always been that friendwhere people are like sis, I got
a lot going on.
You got a couple of hours andin my mind I want to say I don't
have a couple of hours, butbecause how my personality is
wired, I say yes, and then I letthem dump on me and then now I
(07:31):
got to go to therapy.
It's a cycle, y'all.
So I am learning to setboundaries.
Boundaries is so important onyour mental health journey, on
your wellness journey.
But just know that this is ajourney.
When I first was dealing withdepression and anxiety, I did
(07:52):
feel a sense of isolation, andit wasn't because I wanted to be
isolated, it's because peopleweren't really ready to process.
So I am so grateful that we arein a society right now that is
a lot more open to sharing theirexperiences.
I would say one of the bestexperiences from the Olympics
(08:12):
was the year when Simone Bileswas really open about her mental
health and that level ofbravery.
When other people were talkingabout her saying she should keep
going, I remember saying girl,I am proud of you, like you did
it, like you took a stand andyou put yourself first.
And so I I wanna challenge you.
(08:32):
When you are in these seasonswhere you're feeling like man,
there's a lot of pressure on me,there's a lot of weight on me,
like you can literally feel thetension and pressure in your
shoulders.
Right, I want you to relax yourshoulders, I want you to take a
deep breath.
Breathing exercises have beenreally powerful for me.
There are still times where Iget anxious because my plate is
(08:56):
full okay, with the dessert onthe side, okay.
So I know what it feels like tohave a lot going on, and so
when I do different breathingexercises, when I take a moment
to take a pause, that has been agame changer for me and I try
to find those simple joys, thosesimple pleasures in life so
(09:19):
that I can make sure that I'mtaking care of myself.
So you might be thinking,jessica, like how do I start to
incorporate mental health intomy life?
What does it look like formental health to be a priority?
So I have a handful of appsthat I will leave for you in the
show notes that have beenreally helpful for me.
(09:40):
I am big on sleep, like havingdeep sleep.
Because I have so much going onin my plate, it is hard for me
to go to sleep.
So I have an app called BetterSleep and it's really cool.
It allows you to be your ownself-care DJ, if you like.
A little bit of wind, a littlebit of water when you are
(10:03):
sleeping, like it allows you toset your atmosphere for rest.
I also like scent, so like acandle or a plugin or something
like that.
I like mood lighting, and so Iused to think it was really
extra to set an atmosphere torest.
But in today's society andhustle culture, we are not wired
(10:26):
to be resters, we are wired tobe doers, and so when you're
constantly doing and you're onthis hamster wheel, it can be
really hard to take a pause andsay let me take care of myself.
It can be really hard to stopscrolling on social media and
say I need to go to bed, and sothese type of apps have really
(10:46):
helped me, apps like the calmapp I mean there's so many
different apps that are put intoplace.
There is a mental health appthat I really love that I'm
going to link below as well, butit allows you to check in on an
app and you lean into gratitude, you lean into how you're doing
(11:07):
, and I love that, because itcan be really hard in a 24 hour
period to stop for five minutesand ask yourself how you're
doing, when I realized that thatwas a necessity and not
something.
It would just be so nice if Ihad time to take care of myself.
It's like, if you can't giveyourself five minutes, really it
(11:28):
doesn't even take that twominutes to say how am I doing?
Am I doing okay, am I doingphenomenal or am I struggling?
The reason I want you to checkin on yourself daily, it's
because you will start to see apattern, once a week goes by,
where you're like reallystruggling, that next week rolls
(11:49):
around and you're still in thesame state.
That means something has tochange, something has to shift.
That's when you need to startreaching out to your friends.
I always say, if you go aboutthree to five days where you're
consistently struggling, youneed to reach out for support,
because you don't have to dothis alone.
And I want to free you fromyour past.
(12:11):
Maybe you had a situation whereyou were like you know I've
been reaching out to people andno one's reaching back out to me
, like I try to remind myselfthat people are busy, that they
have stuff going on in their ownlife.
And I'm going to keep reachingout because my life is that
important, and so I want toencourage you if you're going
(12:31):
through something right now.
Currently, there are resourcesavailable.
There are therapy that you cango to, call centers.
I mean, there are resourcesavailable.
So I don't want you to feellike there is not a solution for
you.
We need you.
We need you on this earth.
I know you might be thinking,jess, I haven't even met you yet
, but I know, if you are tunedinto this podcast, you are
(12:59):
someone that understands theimportance of mental health.
You're someone that understandsthe value of self-care.
You understand that you need tolove yourself, and so we need
you on this planet.
Like you were created to do somany amazing things, but to do
all of the things that you werepurposed to do, that's going to
happen when you are in alignmentwith every area of your life.
(13:19):
So I want you to know thatprioritizing your mental health,
your self-care, your wellbeing,is vital.
Uh, let's talk about, like, whatself-care isn't.
You know I am a huge advocateof self care, and we kind of
have gotten into this place onsocial media where, when I talk
to people about self care, thefirst thing they'll tell me is
(13:41):
they can't afford it.
Let's break down the name, okay.
Self-care means to care foryourself.
You can't afford to take careof yourself.
When I hear people say that, tome it's a red flag because I
realize that people thinkself-care is a trip to the spa.
They think self-care is anexpensive vacation so they can
(14:04):
post it on social media.
Self-care just means to do thethings that bring you joy, that
bring you peace, that allow youto rest, allow you to relax One
of my favorite things I love totravel Like.
If I could be on a plane everyweek, I would, and there was a
season when I did that, but I ama whole wife of 10 years and a
(14:26):
mother of a medically complexchild.
That requires a lot of my timeand attention.
So what do I do?
I want y'all to try it.
You know, tag me.
If y'all do this, let me know.
I go on Netflix, okay, and Itype in like luxury resort with
ocean music, okay, it will takeme to a resort virtually, and
(14:50):
that is like I use as my TVscreen and I can hear the waves
and the ocean and for a momentit allows me to temporarily
escape some of the stress andthe pressures that I'm dealing
with, so that I can really justhave a moment to relax.
You know, for some of you thatmight look like having a luxury
(15:14):
bath.
I like to call, say, a luxurybath or a luxury shower.
That's when you start addingdifferent elements right, like
they make phone cases that canget wet, right, so you can have
your music in the shower, in thebath you can have your scents
going.
I love those shower steamers orthe bath bombs.
Get the right lighting, youwill think you are at a
(15:36):
five-star resort.
So I just want you to know thatthere are a lot of ways that
you can take care of yourself.
There's a lot of ways that youcan prioritize your mental
health and your well-being.
And a lot of people ask me, likenot only why am I passionate
about mental health, but why doI consider myself a go-to
(15:56):
authority in this space?
It used to be interesting to mein the beginning why colleges
and corporations and majororganizations would choose me to
come in to speak on mentalhealth instead of a licensed
professional.
I used to be like whoa, likeit's just blow my mind being one
of the number one speakers inthe mental health space.
(16:17):
I realized and I asked myclients.
This is what they told me.
It wasn't just because I amcommitted to this space.
I'm committed to being aconstant learner.
I remember when the mentalhealth first aid certification
came out, I was one of the firstpeople to get it.
I got it certified in both theadult and the children because I
(16:38):
wanted to make sure that I wasconstantly learning and growing.
It wasn't because I took thetime took me a very long time to
get my life coachingcertification, because I wanted
to go deeper with my clients.
It was because I was willing tobe transparent.
We live in a world where peopleare tired of perfection, people
are tired of the filters, peopleare tired of seeing stuff that
(17:00):
they can't relate to, and I havealways been willing to be raw,
to be real and to be honest withthe attendees that I have the
opportunity to speak to, becausethat's what I resonate with.
When I hear that someone'sstruggling with their mental
health, when I hear that someoneis burnt out, when I hear that
someone was dealing withsomething and then they got to
(17:22):
the other side, that's whatmakes me curious.
It makes me curious okay, ifyou were able to do it, maybe I
can do it.
And then I started sharingthose coping strategies.
I started doing more researchthat was actually working, that
was research-based and that madethe difference.
So I just want to encourage youfor the things that you are
(17:43):
passionate about.
It might start like a passionproject.
Back in the day people were nottalking about mental health and
I remember when my friends andsome of my family would say I
don't think you should sharesome of those you know, like
personal things, like peoplemight judge you, people might,
you know, look at youdifferently because you're
struggling.
And I realized that I have aresponsibility.
(18:07):
Some of you guys know me asAmerica's Big Sister.
That is not just the cute,trendy title.
It's because as soon as I meetyou, we are now family.
Hey, family, hey cousin.
We're family, which means Ilove you, I care for you and I'm
sometimes gonna say stuff youdon't wanna hear, but you need
to hear, and that's the energy Ibring to every audience that I
(18:30):
have the pleasure of speaking to, and that's why I wanted to
start this podcast.
Like I want to be your bigsister, I wanna be there to help
you through your healingjourney.
I want you to realize that youare not in this world alone.
Like I believe in the power ofcommunity so that we can do this
thing called life together.
I want to be thataccountability partner for you
(18:53):
as you're going throughdifferent things.
Like I want to receive your DMs, I will actually answer them.
So if you're not connected withus on social media yet, make
sure you follow us on socialmedia at finallyhealpod, because
I'm going to be the one, not myteam I'm going to be the one
responding to those DMs.
Like, if you're struggling,like hit me with a voice note.
(19:14):
Like I will pray for you.
Like we are family now and Ithink it's so important to know
that there is someone in thisbig world with billions of
people, cares about you, caresabout your mental health and
cares about your well-being, andI am grateful to be that person
in your life.
(19:35):
It is truly an honor.
So we're getting to my favoritesegment, which is called the
healing moment, where I'm goingto give you an action item,
where I want you to take actionon it because you deserve it.
This is going to be a homeworkassignment that's truly going to
help you succeed on your mentalhealth.
(19:55):
So I want you to create asystem, a structure, a process
on how you are actually going tocheck in daily on your mental
health.
There's an app I like calledMood Fit.
I'll put it down below and youcan actually go in and rank
(20:16):
scale of one to 10, how you'refeeling right now.
You can actually add words toit.
You can actually journal in appbecause there's a lot of
amazing resources available toyou and if you do not have a
therapist, like a licensedtherapist, there's room for both
right People who have beendoing this a long time on the
battlefield Okay, and there arepeople that have the degrees and
(20:36):
the expertise and they can beone-on-one with you with as much
time as you need them.
Like I want you to check outthe BetterHelp app.
Like, there are so manyresources available that you do
not have to feel alone in yourhealing journey and I'm excited
to be there right beside you.
So this has been another episodeof the Finally Healed podcast.
(21:03):
I am so excited to have you apart of our community.
If this episode was valuable,hit us with that five-star
review on whatever platform thatyou are listening or watching
this on, share this with afriend.
Subscribe so that you can getnotifications every time we
(21:25):
launch a new episode andremember you got this.
If you are someone who feels like you have
been struggling with your mentalhealth, with your well-being,
it's okay to ask for help.
That uncomfortability levelsaved my life.
Once a week goes by whereyou're like really struggling,
that next week rolls around andyou're still in the same state.
(00:20):
That means something has tochange.
You need to reach out forsupport because you don't have
to do this alone.
So I don't want you to feellike there is not a solution for
you.
We need you.
(00:54):
Welcome to another episode ofFinally Healed with Jessica
Lundy podcast, where weprioritize mental health,
self-care and embracing ourhealing journey together.
Now for this episode, you mightneed to get your tissue okay,
your Kleenex out, because thisone is going to be emotional.
I'm going to be talking aboutmental health, breaking down my
(01:16):
mental health journey and whyit's been important to me and
I'm truly going to challenge youon this episode to get real, to
get raw and to get vulnerableand to meet me with the level of
transparency that I'm going togive you.
So let's start talking aboutwhat mental health is and isn't.
(01:38):
A lot of times when people hearthe word mental health, they
instantly think about disorders,right?
They think about depression oranxiety or bipolar, or
schizophrenia.
They constantly think aboutthis.
In actuality, self-care issomething that we do on a daily
basis, right?
(01:58):
So it does have to do with thepsychology, it does have to do
with the social skills, it doeshave to do with our everyday
interaction with people, on howwe handle our conversations, how
we think about ourselves.
It's much more of a broaderumbrella than how much we really
narrow it down.
And so when I think aboutmental health and how important
(02:21):
it is, a lot of times I do kindof couple it with mental health,
with wellness, with burnout,self-care and self-love, because
I feel like they are allintertwined and equally as
important.
And when I think about mymental health journey, it has
been a journey.
When I was a senior in highschool, I was diagnosed with
(02:46):
depression and anxiety and itwas challenging.
My senior year in high schoolwas really one of the hardest
years of my life.
I was already getting ready totransition from high school to
college, which is already a lotand then finding out that
diagnosis was really challenging.
Prior to that, I was popular, Iwas a cheerleader, I was super
(03:09):
active, but once I had an injuryan injury that actually
happened when I was 11 years oldwhere I fell backwards on
cement with the too heavy of abackpack, sidebar to all my
educators.
Students' backpacks should notbe that heavy, but my backpack
was 50 pounds and it permanentlydamaged my back.
(03:31):
We went to see every specialistknown to man.
I'm originally from Michigan,so U of M Hospital was trying
everything on me until my senioryear in high school.
I was in excruciating pain fromsunup to sundown, so they gave
me an experimental drug thatwould help change the way I
perceive pain.
What they did not tell me wasthe laundry list of side effects
(03:54):
and would you believe that Iended up getting all of them,
which led to a really bad, longextent of depression, severe
depression, anxiety, suicidalthoughts and really took me to a
dark place where my personalitychanged, my identity changed
(04:14):
and now I had to get ready forcollege.
And college was a challengingtime for me because I was trying
to figure out who I am as aperson and then who I am as a
person with mental illness or amental disorder, and I think it
was challenging because I didn'thave family support.
Now let me take that back.
(04:36):
My family was understanding.
The church family that I was apart of, was not really ready to
have some of those difficultconversations.
So if you are someone who feelslike you have been struggling
with your mental health, withyour well-being, it's okay to
(04:58):
ask for help.
It's okay to be vulnerable.
I remember being vulnerable ata time where I could tell it was
kind of making my friends andfamily uncomfortable.
But what I realized is thatuncomfortability level saved my
life.
Telling people that I wanted totake my own life, telling
(05:18):
people that I was superdepressed and didn't want to get
out of the bed and somethingwas wrong with me, allowed me to
have the accountability that Ineeded to sit here on this couch
today.
So if you know me as aninternational motivational
speaker or you've seen mespeaking to college students,
this is why I'm so passionateabout it, because if I didn't
(05:41):
embrace the healing journey, ifI didn't put my mental health as
my top priority, I would not beable to travel around the world
and help and heal people.
I would not have the type ofconviction that I have to share
the importance of the copingstrategies that I teach.
(06:01):
I am a huge advocate of beingsomeone that, if you've been
through something, you've beenthrough some trauma, you've been
through some brokenness.
You've been through a lot.
I believe that happens to somepeople that are so brave that
will one day share theexperience so that I can
actually help and heal people.
(06:21):
And so I am on this mission,right.
That was one of the reasons Istarted this podcast because I
want you to heal Now.
I don't want you to hear thename Finally Healed and think
that I have arrived right, thatmy healing journey is over.
I have a therapy appointmentscheduled this week.
Okay.
I remember my therapist triedto fire herself.
(06:44):
She told me that I was.
I was so healed and I didn'tneed a therapist anymore and I
said, lady, I will see you nextweek.
Okay, because healing issomething that we have to
constantly keep doing.
We don't know what trauma isaround the corner in our lives.
So it's important to have atherapist, it's important to
have a counselor.
I want you to do yourself afavor and make sure you have the
(07:08):
support that you deserve tohave.
It can be so easy to dump onyour friends.
I have always been that friendwhere people are like sis, I got
a lot going on.
You got a couple of hours andin my mind I want to say I don't
have a couple of hours, butbecause how my personality is
wired, I say yes, and then I letthem dump on me and then now I
(07:31):
got to go to therapy.
It's a cycle, y'all.
So I am learning to setboundaries.
Boundaries is so important onyour mental health journey, on
your wellness journey.
But just know that this is ajourney.
When I first was dealing withdepression and anxiety, I did
(07:52):
feel a sense of isolation, andit wasn't because I wanted to be
isolated, it's because peopleweren't really ready to process.
So I am so grateful that we arein a society right now that is
a lot more open to sharing theirexperiences.
I would say one of the bestexperiences from the Olympics
(08:12):
was the year when Simone Bileswas really open about her mental
health and that level ofbravery.
When other people were talkingabout her saying she should keep
going, I remember saying girl,I am proud of you, like you did
it, like you took a stand andyou put yourself first.
And so I I wanna challenge you.
(08:32):
When you are in these seasonswhere you're feeling like man,
there's a lot of pressure on me,there's a lot of weight on me,
like you can literally feel thetension and pressure in your
shoulders.
Right, I want you to relax yourshoulders, I want you to take a
deep breath.
Breathing exercises have beenreally powerful for me.
There are still times where Iget anxious because my plate is
(08:56):
full okay, with the dessert onthe side, okay.
So I know what it feels like tohave a lot going on, and so
when I do different breathingexercises, when I take a moment
to take a pause, that has been agame changer for me and I try
to find those simple joys, thosesimple pleasures in life so
(09:19):
that I can make sure that I'mtaking care of myself.
So you might be thinking,jessica, like how do I start to
incorporate mental health intomy life?
What does it look like formental health to be a priority?
So I have a handful of appsthat I will leave for you in the
show notes that have beenreally helpful for me.
(09:40):
I am big on sleep, like havingdeep sleep.
Because I have so much going onin my plate, it is hard for me
to go to sleep.
So I have an app called BetterSleep and it's really cool.
It allows you to be your ownself-care DJ, if you like.
A little bit of wind, a littlebit of water when you are
(10:03):
sleeping, like it allows you toset your atmosphere for rest.
I also like scent, so like acandle or a plugin or something
like that.
I like mood lighting, and so Iused to think it was really
extra to set an atmosphere torest.
But in today's society andhustle culture, we are not wired
(10:26):
to be resters, we are wired tobe doers, and so when you're
constantly doing and you're onthis hamster wheel, it can be
really hard to take a pause andsay let me take care of myself.
It can be really hard to stopscrolling on social media and
say I need to go to bed, and sothese type of apps have really
(10:46):
helped me, apps like the calmapp I mean there's so many
different apps that are put intoplace.
There is a mental health appthat I really love that I'm
going to link below as well, butit allows you to check in on an
app and you lean into gratitude, you lean into how you're doing
(11:07):
, and I love that, because itcan be really hard in a 24 hour
period to stop for five minutesand ask yourself how you're
doing, when I realized that thatwas a necessity and not
something.
It would just be so nice if Ihad time to take care of myself.
It's like, if you can't giveyourself five minutes, really it
(11:28):
doesn't even take that twominutes to say how am I doing?
Am I doing okay, am I doingphenomenal or am I struggling?
The reason I want you to checkin on yourself daily, it's
because you will start to see apattern, once a week goes by,
where you're like reallystruggling, that next week rolls
(11:49):
around and you're still in thesame state.
That means something has tochange, something has to shift.
That's when you need to startreaching out to your friends.
I always say, if you go aboutthree to five days where you're
consistently struggling, youneed to reach out for support,
because you don't have to dothis alone.
And I want to free you fromyour past.
(12:11):
Maybe you had a situation whereyou were like you know I've
been reaching out to people andno one's reaching back out to me
, like I try to remind myselfthat people are busy, that they
have stuff going on in their ownlife.
And I'm going to keep reachingout because my life is that
important, and so I want toencourage you if you're going
(12:31):
through something right now.
Currently, there are resourcesavailable.
There are therapy that you cango to, call centers.
I mean, there are resourcesavailable.
So I don't want you to feellike there is not a solution for
you.
We need you.
We need you on this earth.
I know you might be thinking,jess, I haven't even met you yet
, but I know, if you are tunedinto this podcast, you are
(12:59):
someone that understands theimportance of mental health.
You're someone that understandsthe value of self-care.
You understand that you need tolove yourself, and so we need
you on this planet.
Like you were created to do somany amazing things, but to do
all of the things that you werepurposed to do, that's going to
happen when you are in alignmentwith every area of your life.
(13:19):
So I want you to know thatprioritizing your mental health,
your self-care, your wellbeing,is vital.
Uh, let's talk about, like, whatself-care isn't.
You know I am a huge advocateof self care, and we kind of
have gotten into this place onsocial media where, when I talk
to people about self care, thefirst thing they'll tell me is
(13:41):
they can't afford it.
Let's break down the name, okay.
Self-care means to care foryourself.
You can't afford to take careof yourself.
When I hear people say that, tome it's a red flag because I
realize that people thinkself-care is a trip to the spa.
They think self-care is anexpensive vacation so they can
(14:04):
post it on social media.
Self-care just means to do thethings that bring you joy, that
bring you peace, that allow youto rest, allow you to relax One
of my favorite things I love totravel Like.
If I could be on a plane everyweek, I would, and there was a
season when I did that, but I ama whole wife of 10 years and a
(14:26):
mother of a medically complexchild.
That requires a lot of my timeand attention.
So what do I do?
I want y'all to try it.
You know, tag me.
If y'all do this, let me know.
I go on Netflix, okay, and Itype in like luxury resort with
ocean music, okay, it will takeme to a resort virtually, and
(14:50):
that is like I use as my TVscreen and I can hear the waves
and the ocean and for a momentit allows me to temporarily
escape some of the stress andthe pressures that I'm dealing
with, so that I can really justhave a moment to relax.
You know, for some of you thatmight look like having a luxury
(15:14):
bath.
I like to call, say, a luxurybath or a luxury shower.
That's when you start addingdifferent elements right, like
they make phone cases that canget wet, right, so you can have
your music in the shower, in thebath you can have your scents
going.
I love those shower steamers orthe bath bombs.
Get the right lighting, youwill think you are at a
(15:36):
five-star resort.
So I just want you to know thatthere are a lot of ways that
you can take care of yourself.
There's a lot of ways that youcan prioritize your mental
health and your well-being.
And a lot of people ask me, likenot only why am I passionate
about mental health, but why doI consider myself a go-to
(15:56):
authority in this space?
It used to be interesting to mein the beginning why colleges
and corporations and majororganizations would choose me to
come in to speak on mentalhealth instead of a licensed
professional.
I used to be like whoa, likeit's just blow my mind being one
of the number one speakers inthe mental health space.
(16:17):
I realized and I asked myclients.
This is what they told me.
It wasn't just because I amcommitted to this space.
I'm committed to being aconstant learner.
I remember when the mentalhealth first aid certification
came out, I was one of the firstpeople to get it.
I got it certified in both theadult and the children because I
(16:38):
wanted to make sure that I wasconstantly learning and growing.
It wasn't because I took thetime took me a very long time to
get my life coachingcertification, because I wanted
to go deeper with my clients.
It was because I was willing tobe transparent.
We live in a world where peopleare tired of perfection, people
are tired of the filters, peopleare tired of seeing stuff that
(17:00):
they can't relate to, and I havealways been willing to be raw,
to be real and to be honest withthe attendees that I have the
opportunity to speak to, becausethat's what I resonate with.
When I hear that someone'sstruggling with their mental
health, when I hear that someoneis burnt out, when I hear that
someone was dealing withsomething and then they got to
(17:22):
the other side, that's whatmakes me curious.
It makes me curious okay, ifyou were able to do it, maybe I
can do it.
And then I started sharingthose coping strategies.
I started doing more researchthat was actually working, that
was research-based and that madethe difference.
So I just want to encourage youfor the things that you are
(17:43):
passionate about.
It might start like a passionproject.
Back in the day people were nottalking about mental health and
I remember when my friends andsome of my family would say I
don't think you should sharesome of those you know, like
personal things, like peoplemight judge you, people might,
you know, look at youdifferently because you're
struggling.
And I realized that I have aresponsibility.
(18:07):
Some of you guys know me asAmerica's Big Sister.
That is not just the cute,trendy title.
It's because as soon as I meetyou, we are now family.
Hey, family, hey cousin.
We're family, which means Ilove you, I care for you and I'm
sometimes gonna say stuff youdon't wanna hear, but you need
to hear, and that's the energy Ibring to every audience that I
(18:30):
have the pleasure of speaking to, and that's why I wanted to
start this podcast.
Like I want to be your bigsister, I wanna be there to help
you through your healingjourney.
I want you to realize that youare not in this world alone.
Like I believe in the power ofcommunity so that we can do this
thing called life together.
I want to be thataccountability partner for you
(18:53):
as you're going throughdifferent things.
Like I want to receive your DMs, I will actually answer them.
So if you're not connected withus on social media yet, make
sure you follow us on socialmedia at finallyhealpod, because
I'm going to be the one, not myteam I'm going to be the one
responding to those DMs.
Like, if you're struggling,like hit me with a voice note.
(19:14):
Like I will pray for you.
Like we are family now and Ithink it's so important to know
that there is someone in thisbig world with billions of
people, cares about you, caresabout your mental health and
cares about your well-being, andI am grateful to be that person
in your life.
(19:35):
It is truly an honor.
So we're getting to my favoritesegment, which is called the
healing moment, where I'm goingto give you an action item,
where I want you to take actionon it because you deserve it.
This is going to be a homeworkassignment that's truly going to
help you succeed on your mentalhealth.
(19:55):
So I want you to create asystem, a structure, a process
on how you are actually going tocheck in daily on your mental
health.
There's an app I like calledMood Fit.
I'll put it down below and youcan actually go in and rank
(20:16):
scale of one to 10, how you'refeeling right now.
You can actually add words toit.
You can actually journal in appbecause there's a lot of
amazing resources available toyou and if you do not have a
therapist, like a licensedtherapist, there's room for both
right People who have beendoing this a long time on the
battlefield Okay, and there arepeople that have the degrees and
(20:36):
the expertise and they can beone-on-one with you with as much
time as you need them.
Like I want you to check outthe BetterHelp app.
Like, there are so manyresources available that you do
not have to feel alone in yourhealing journey and I'm excited
to be there right beside you.
So this has been another episodeof the Finally Healed podcast.
(21:03):
I am so excited to have you apart of our community.
If this episode was valuable,hit us with that five-star
review on whatever platform thatyou are listening or watching
this on, share this with afriend.
Subscribe so that you can getnotifications every time we
(21:25):
launch a new episode andremember you got this.
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