95 - Stylist Kate Taylor talks passion and pivots - The Flirty Vegan

Episode Transcript
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(00:02):
Hey ladies, my name is Jenny Chaffetz and I am the host of
Sideline Sisters. Are you a busy mom, powerhouse
professional or high achieving go getter?
This show is for no BS women whowant to be inspired to get off
the sidelines of their lives. Ever feel like you're playing
small or safe or just on autopilot?

(00:23):
My guests are relatable women who've gone on a journey,
overcome challenges, and live toshare the lessons that we want
to hear. These conversations will be
funny, sad, scary, wise, encouraging, and most of all,
real. So whether you're driving, doing
chores, exercising, walking the dog, or just laying on the

(00:45):
couch, settle in and enjoy. I want to invite you to take
back your power, reignite your passions, and step off the
sidelines. Let's go.
Hey, my friends, welcome to thisweek's episode of the Sideline
Sisters Podcast. I am your host, Jenny Chaffetz.
And if you tuned in last week, then you heard my conversation

(01:06):
with fashion influencer Jen Sadler.
And we are continuing the serieson fashion, image, style with my
guest today, Kate Taylor. Now, before I tell you about
Kate Taylor, I want to say HappyNew Year to.
All of the. Jewish identifying listeners.
It's such a beautiful time of year when we get to cast off our

(01:29):
sins and things that we are perhaps not proud of or not
wishing to carry forward into the future, and we get to look
ahead with light and love in ourhearts.
And so Shana Tova to you. And thank you from the bottom of
my heart for tuning in and listening to these episodes and

(01:50):
sharing them with friends. One of my favorite.
Things to do. Is listen to podcasts and then
share the episode with someone Iknow who I think would find
value as a podcaster. I know that listeners telling
other people about episodes is really important for the podcast
growth. But as a human, I also want to
share interesting conversations and knowledge that I think would

(02:14):
benefit other people. So I thank you for listening and
helping me spread these beautiful messages.
And for those of you who are listening who live somewhere
near Southern New Hampshire, I am opening my home to you.
I am inviting you to join me at my house on Sunday, October 5th
at 3:00 PM Eastern Time for a cozy, delicious opportunity to

(02:38):
connect and hear about the benefits of a plant based
lifestyle. I know veganism sounds extreme.
I've heard all the negative comments from people I know and
just from voices. Out in the.
Ether pop culture. So I've heard it all and I want
to dispel those myths. I want to inspire you to

(02:58):
consider this lifestyle and if it's just an experiment, which
is why I'm offering a four week program just for you to try it
out and see how you feel like literally feel in your body as
well as mentally, emotionally, spiritually.
But I would love to have you at my house for a fun couple hours

(03:20):
of demo recipes, serve you goodies and send you home with a
little bag of treats. So please check the show notes
for the link to register or justgo directly to
gentlecoaching.com/workshop, grab a friend and let's have
some fun with it. And if you're concerned, I
checked and the Patriots are playing at night on October 5th.

(03:41):
And listen, my passion about a plant based lifestyle is
multifactorial. It has to do with our health as
well as animal welfare, as well as concerns about the
environment, the land, the water, the air around us as well
as. A sort of.

(04:01):
Universal sense of compassion and I feel that compassion
toward myself and all the other living beings around me.
I have become a more understanding, empathetic person
since going vegan. And so if you find that you're
being really. Harsh toward yourself or others?
I know it sounds crazy, but maybe going vegan would help

(04:22):
with that. And let's also address concerns
about chronic disease. Sleep, skin, hair and nails,
energy, mood, vitality, creativity, concentration,
clarity. All of these things have been
scientifically linked to eating more plants and reducing animal
consumption. So I hope you will also check

(04:43):
out my four week program at gentlecoaching.com/veganism.
Now let me tell you about Kate Taylor.
Kate is a mentor, speaker and business strategist for Fashion
Stylist Ready to Scale with Soul.
With 15 plus years in the fashion industry, she now leads
a global membership and coachingbusiness that helps stylists
create consistent income, elevate their brand and build a

(05:07):
life and business they love. Known for her blend of style,
strategy and soul, Kate empower stylist to step into leadership,
serve powerfully and thrive without burnout.
Kate is not your average stylist, not that I even know
what that is really, but she hasa really fantastic back story
and. She's just a really special.

(05:28):
Person and what's kind of ironicis that we don't actually talk
much about fashion. The conversation twisted and
turned in other directions that were deeper and more relatable.
So I think you're really going to enjoy this one.
And remember, the series on fashion image and style
continues for the next several weeks.

(05:49):
So be sure to subscribe or follow this podcast wherever you
listen so that each week's new episode shows up up in your
queue for you. And in case you didn't know, I
also have a YouTube channel for this podcast in case you would
prefer to watch the conversations.
And it's just Sideline Sisters Podcast on YouTube, or you can

(06:09):
find the link in the show notes.Now let's get into today's
conversation with Kate Taylor. Yay.
Welcome back to another episode of Sideline Sisters.
I'm super excited to be joined today by Kate Taylor.
Kate, welcome. Thanks for having me, I'm super
excited to be here. Well, you are an inspiration.

(06:34):
You are interesting and intriguing and you are a really
accomplished badass fashion Wonder Woman, so.
I'm, I'm gonna, I'm gonna tagline that.
Great, great. Just, you know, put put my name
in the SEO. I'll give you credit for sure.

(06:55):
No, yeah, I was. I was thinking earlier like,
what do I wear to talk to a fashion stylist?
And then I'm like, you know what, It's like 115° out.
So I'm just gonna wear the lightest thing I.
Own so a banty. I love banties.
Are you kidding? Exactly.
So good. And it's one of those like, it's
that like see through cotton, like, you know, like this super
shred. It looks like it's burnt, you

(07:15):
know, 45 years old. But it's not 'cause it's just
worn. So it's very light, which is
great 'cause it's, this is not my season, but it's your season
every day of the year. So, yeah, yeah, yeah, very much
now. I mean, we were in LA and it was
our season every day of the year.
And now we're in Arizona, so it's even more our season every

(07:36):
day of the year. And you spent time in Boston,
though, so like, that's my neck of the woods.
How much of A? Shot in as home I, I would live
there for a little over 15 yearsand it was kind of like my
formative years. It was grad school and it was
figuring out what I wanted to dowith myself.
It's like my it was my, you know, 20s and 30s and I moved

(07:58):
right when I turned 40, but to LA, but it was formative years
and I treasure Boston. It's where my fiance and I are
going to get married and it's. Yeah, it's a, it's a great.
I love. Boston.
Mazel tov, that's so great. Thank you.
Yeah. And I just found my dress.
I went there to see clients and then got to do a little wedding
stuff and found my dress. So it's exciting.

(08:18):
I. Love Boston.
That's so exciting. Yeah, yeah, we, we have fun
there. And my daughter's going to
college there, so I'll, I'll be there bugging her, knocking on
the door all the time. So.
Oh. Absolutely.
My mom was there all the time when I was in school.
Like, perfect reason to be in the city, yeah.
I know, I know, people tend to like give her distance but maybe

(08:40):
not. Go, visit.
Go. Visit Yeah.
So people who have followed, youknow, the range of things that
you do or have done and continueto do the, the styling and
mentoring and just overall like you're a beacon of fashion ideas

(09:04):
and, and support for people likemyself and also business like
business support, business guidance for people.
So you've you've done a lot of things and it's mind blowing
when people hear that. That's not how you began.

(09:26):
So I know people can like Googlethe story or see it elsewhere,
but just give us give us like the short, the abridged version
of Doctor Turn Stylist. Yeah, the 10,000 foot view is I
was, I became a fashion stylist by way of almost going to
medical school. And I joke like, isn't that how
everyone becomes a? Fashion, right?

(09:48):
I mean, if I asked my doctor, I'm sure she'd have the same
story. Yeah, yeah, Almost became a
fashion stylist. No, but honestly, when I started
training and and coaching other stylists and I asked if there
were any other science nerds, like when we would do launches
and things like that. You would be surprised by how
many people are in the sciences or in math careers, engineers or

(10:10):
accountants or whatever that arelike secret stylists or secret
fashionistas. You'd be surprised.
So maybe it is kind of the way of becoming one for for a lot of
people. But I.
That would be an interesting poll to take.
Right. Yeah, I moved to Boston actually
to go to medical school and got my master's degree there, did
post grad work there, worked at the number one pediatric

(10:33):
institution in America, Children's Hospital, Boston's
incredible facility. Very familiar with it.
Yep, Yep. Incredible.
Loved my time there. I was in charge of the trainees,
so the residents and the fellowsfor one of the departments there
and loved it and was still very much, you know, enveloped in

(10:54):
that world and had Harvard recommendation letters.
I had everything ready to go. Like literally all I needed to
do was submit my application, had taken the MCAT, etcetera,
etcetera, and I could not submitit and I could not figure out
what was going on. Was it like a fear of failure?
And then I kind of did a little soul searching and what I had

(11:15):
been been doing on the side justfor fun, was working with a
makeup artist. And I was kind of attiliating
under her. She was, you know, a top artist
in the city at the time. And I had just reached out to
her kind of the way that I've gotten most of my jobs just by
saying, like, hey, is there anything you need done?

(11:38):
Like, I will literally clean thetoilets.
I'll wash your brushes, like, whatever you need.
Can I just, like learn from you?And it's kind of my secret hack
when it comes to getting jobs. And people are like, I don't
know how to get this job. I'm like, I've got hacks for you
but. Offer to clean toilets and.
Get yeah, exactly. No, it's just like get your foot
in the door. Like however, like how I got
into children's was through a grant project that they just

(11:59):
needed some help with. And they basically were like, we
don't, we don't have anything beyond this though.
It's only like a four or five month thing.
And I was like, that's fine, I'll take it.
Because I knew once I got in, I would prove like, this girl's
invaluable. Like we need to find something
Virgio isn't. That like the story that now I'm
going to blank on her name, but Sherry Salata the the Oprah

(12:22):
person. Yeah, I think so.
I think you're. Right.
It was just like, I'll take thatpart time contract job at the
Oprah show, being an assistant to the assistant to the
assistant, and then you end up being producer because you.
Yeah. Exactly.
Show your value. OK, exactly.
Show your value and and I'm kindof a Jedi, I would say with

(12:46):
finding holes. That need to be.
Filled and finding like a need for things.
So when I was working this job, I was just very much getting to
know everyone there and realizedthey needed help with the
trainees. It was becoming a huge thing and
I was like well I can help. And then all of a sudden I was
like, well, now we don't want her to stop helping.
So anyway, I digress. So what I was doing on the side

(13:07):
is on the weekends and in the evenings, like most spare time
that I had now, spare time was minimal because I was working
full time. I was going to grad school full
time and then once I finished grad school, I was doing post
grad work. So I was taking other courses at
other institutions. So I didn't have a ton of spare
time, but I was still doing because I was just like, I don't

(13:28):
know, my creative passion. I just wanted to do something
creative and I kind of had this come to Jesus moment where it
was like, why don't I want to goto medical school?
And I realized that the the beauty stuff that I was doing
and I'd started doing a little fashion help as well.
So like on set we would work with celebrities and photo
shoots and all that kind of stuff.

(13:48):
And on set when we were doing photo shoots.
I would start to help the stylist as well.
And I was realizing I really enjoyed that.
And at the same time, I had doctors that I was in charge of,
these trainees that loved what they were doing.
They loved helping the kids. But they said to me, if you can
do anything else and be happy, you should consider it because

(14:11):
medicine is not really about what it was.
And you can certainly carve out your corner in the world.
It's not like you have to do what everyone else is doing.
You can find something that you love in medicine.
And if this is all you can do and be happy, keep doing it.
But if there's anything else youcould do and still find that
fulfillment, you should considerit.
And I took that to heart becauseI watched these people working

(14:35):
and I knew I would be one of thedoctors that spent all my time
at the hospital like these otherdoctors, because not only are
they working and they're in patient care, but it's a Harvard
institutions. They're they're also involved in
research studies and they're writing books.
I mean, these people are writinglike the textbooks that medical
schools teach with, right? And I knew that would be me.
Like, I'm not someone who's like.

(14:56):
Oh, I'm just going to. Do the easy no.
I would have been like OK, what else can I do?
Which is so. Impressive.
And these doctors are literally incredible.
Like I think doctors that work at children's hospitals are a
special breed of angels because they see the sickest of the sick
and they help those kids no matter what.
It's incredible. And on the personal side, I saw

(15:20):
these doctors who had been working for 20 plus years have
to do every year an annual vacation lottery.
Where they were. Requesting what weeks they could
take off and well, if you have kids, then you get priority for
Thanksgiving, Christmas. If you don't have kids, you
likely will have to be on call. And and I was just like, these

(15:41):
people have worked so hard for so long and they do such
incredible work, but that was just the nature of the beast.
Like it? Was just the.
Reality of it, you had to have avacation lottery and I was
seeing parents, mothers and fathers seeing them like miss
pivotal things in their kids life 'cause they were they were
working. And I just kind of like heard

(16:02):
what the doctors were saying to me was watching, you know, this
personal side of it. And I thought to myself, is
there something else that I could do that I would get that
same amount of fulfillment and still be happy and because I was
doing the fashion and beauty on the side.
It was like. Maybe it exists there.
Like I want to be in medicine because I want to make a
difference. I want to help people.
I want to impact the world. And maybe I can do that through

(16:25):
fashion and beauty. And at the same time, when I had
not submitted my my medical school application, the woman
that I was working for that I was training under said to me,
you know, we're getting so busy where I need someone full time.
So that's either going to be you, because I've trained you,
or I'm going to need to hire someone else.
And I was like, oh gosh. Is.

(16:46):
This like an open door for me toto walk.
Through. And I just knew in my gut, like
I'm I am a generator on the human design chart and I very
much get full body yeses about things like I can feel it in my
gut. And if I don't get a full F yes,
then it has to be an F no for me.

(17:07):
And it was like an F yes. Like I have to do this.
So I decided to leave my job at children's and go full time into
makeup and then got to do more with the fashion.
And then after a couple years decided it was time for me to go
on my own and and complete my time with with makeup and beauty
and just go full on into fashion.

(17:27):
And so I called my mom and said,mom, I don't want to go to
medical. School and she said.
OK, that's what you've been working for, but fine.
What do you want to do? And I said fashion.
And she was like, Oh my God, so it.
Was not the. Most excited reaction, but I
think she knew I always had a lot of grit and a lot of like

(17:52):
gumption about me where it was like, I'm going to I'm going to
make this happen. Like it don't worry, it's I'm
going to figure it out. And yeah, that's how I started
in in the world of fashion. I mean, it wasn't didn't go to,
you know, one of the top fashioninstitutes didn't, you know, do
any of that. I do not design clothes.
I have no training in that whatsoever.
But I'm. Pretty pro level, expert level.

(18:15):
At at styling people and then just wanted to start helping
other people learn how to do it easier.
So that's kind of how it all began.
That's such a good story, I loveit.
Show. I apologize for interrupting
this interview, but I am curious, have you ever thought
about going vegan? Maybe you heard someone talking
about it or read an article online, but you're thinking it

(18:38):
sounds way too restrictive, way too extreme, way too boring, not
to mention all those concerns about protein.
I get it. I've been there myself.
And that is why I am in the process of becoming a certified
Vegan Health and Lifestyle Coach.
And during my course time, I am offering free coaching sessions
to people who are in that hesitation phase, contemplating

(19:01):
going forward, but definitely wanting help.
That's where I come in. So please go to the show notes
and click the link for free Vegan lifestyle coaching session
and we'll get started. Now let's get back to the show.
Now, obviously we can't go back in time and you know, crystal
ball a different outcome, but. If.
The person you were training under hadn't presented this full

(19:24):
time option. Do you think you would have
pivoted the way you did? That's such a good question.
I've never actually thought about that.
I, I mean, because of where I amtoday and what I know today, I
would say there, yes, I would have found a way.
Like there would have been something that would have been

(19:45):
that impetus. But I have found in my life, as
long as I'm following my intuition, those open doors
always happen. Like I said, even with jobs.
Or. Opportunities or experiences.
I just kind of set my mind to things, and as long as I'm
looking for them and not closed off to them, those things will
present themselves to me. So if it wouldn't have been her,

(20:07):
it probably would have been something else that would have
been that impetus. I don't know that I would have
just gone out on my own. I think I still felt like I
wanted more training and more experience.
So if it hadn't have been her, Iprobably would have found
someone else. But I want to say yes.
Because I feel like where I am now is.
Is exactly where I'm supposed tobe.

(20:27):
I mean, if you're going to describe yourself with words
like grit and gumption, I tend to agree with that.
Yeah, I am. That's my nice way of saying
stubborn and sometimes obtuse. Right.
I mean independent is another way of saying.
Exactly. Strong fears.

(20:48):
I could. I could give you a lot of words.
Tonight. No, I'm not angry.
Impressive. I'm determined and I have a
vision. OK, exactly.
That's so good. OK, so clearly to become a
doctor, there's a defined highway, and that goes with a

(21:08):
lot of others, you know, to be alawyer, to be an engineer, to,
to be certain professions. You can't just wake up and say
I'm qualified to do that. Thank God, right?
Well, yes, I'm a doctor. That's like today.
I'm a doctor. What was I doing last week?
Hospitality. Yep.
OK. Plumber last week, yeah.
Even to be a plumber, you know there's a pathway to it.

(21:30):
You can't just wake up and do that, so it's.
For a lot of. People that pathway to a career
is safe. It's it's secure.
There's you know that it's like having padded walls on either
side of you like do this, do a, then B, then C follow it.
You don't have to. I don't want to say be brave

(21:53):
because that's not the right word, but you don't have there's
not the same kind of risk as as setting that aside.
And it's like, you know, you were on this path.
You turn right and there could have been a Cliff.
You didn't know. So, So what what could you say

(22:14):
to people listening who might besomeone who either has been home
for a long time or has been in acareer for a very long time and
it's just not fulfilling anymore.
And this idea of following a passion, you know, becoming a
pastry chef or a jewelry designer making birdhouses, how

(22:37):
do they wrap their brains aroundthe chef?
I think it's. I think it's a little bit like I
think each thing requires something different.
I would say with chasing your dream and going after what your
soul is kind of calling out to you to do that requires an up
level amount of courage, I wouldsay.

(22:58):
And, and courage, I always say, is not not feeling fear.
Courage to me is you feel the fear, but you do it anyway
because you know, you have to, you know that you can't not do
it and you have to kind of take a bite of that when it comes to
this kind of stuff that the physician path and the corporate
path and, and all of those, theyrequire something.

(23:21):
And but it that almost requires like we were talking about poor
determination and drive and you know, depending on what your
goals are there, whether it's like to get a promotion or
whatever like that, those thingsrequire different things.
But it is true what you said, like there is a very clear path.
And that was one of the things that I had to kind of do a mind

(23:43):
shifter on because in medicine there is a very clear set of
rules and regulations, right? Like you go to undergrad and
then maybe you go to grad school, maybe you don't.
Then you have four years of medical school and then you have
four years of residency. And then you do 2 years of
fellowship usually at minimum. Then you can sub specialize in
whatever it goes on. And as long as you are studying

(24:04):
and getting good grades, check, check, check.
You are you are accomplishing things.
When I went into the world of fashion and beauty, it was a
whole different set of rules that I didn't understand because
I'd come from sciences, but you could also say is true for
coming from corporate or things that are very almost regimented
and and you just. Know.

(24:24):
What to expect in in a certain way like?
There is a whole another level of.
You know, becoming a doctor where you don't know, like match
Day people don't know where they're going.
To match there's. There's a level of that too, for
sure. But it is the path is a little
more clear than if you say I just like you said, I want to
become a painter or I want to become a jewelry designer that.

(24:46):
Path is a little. Less clear because there's not
like, oh, everyone that wants tobe jewelry designers go to
jewelry designer school and thenyou.
Go to jewelry apprentice with Yeah.
Yeah, and then you work at the jewelry shop.
Like that's just not how it works.
So that's why I say. In those arenas, it just takes a
little more of stepping into that courage and knowing that

(25:11):
you might feel fear. Like I constantly, there's
constant fears around new thingsbecause it's new, but all that's
happening with that is your brain.
Your subconscious brain is saying, hang on, this feels
unfamiliar. I'm not totally comfortable with
that because we don't know what the end is going to look like.
There's a chance I could fail. There's a chance it won't work.

(25:32):
There's a chance it could go better than I thought it would.
And that scares me too. Like your subconscious brain
will try to take you out in those situations when there is
unknowns. So that's where the courage
comes in. And you have to say, you know
what, I feel those things. I get it clear.
I, I am aware that my subconscious is trying to

(25:53):
protect me. And I get to also say it's OK,
like little Kate that might be scared right now, It's OK.
We're going to have a little courage and we're going to try
it anyway. Because my theory is, and you
and I were talking about this little bit before we started a
dream unrealized is one of the most heartbreaking things.
And I've had tons of stylists come to me, you know, that are

(26:17):
60 plus and say I was in corporate for 30 years and
really all I wanted to be doing was fashion or I, you know, was
a homemaker. For. 30 years and I really just
wanted to be a fashion stylist at the same time and I couldn't
'cause I was taking care of the kids.
And my thing is, OK, fine, then start now.
Because I don't necessarily believe in failure.

(26:39):
I know there's people that I look up to a lot that are like,
you should fail constantly. And, and I get it.
I mean, I understand the conceptof that.
Like I understand, you know, fail as much as you can, but my,
my view on failure is it's not failure, it's just contrast.
Like it's just learning what didn't work.
So you know how to adjust it. So when you're stepping into

(27:01):
something new like this, whetheryou are 607080, I don't care,
know that you just get to learn from the contrast.
So maybe you don't get it perfect the first time.
Maybe you don't know what you'redoing.
Right off the bat. OK, so then learn, get some
resources or talk to some peopleand just try.
And as you try, you will have experiences that will give you

(27:24):
contrast meaning. You will get to see.
I really like this. I don't really like this.
OK, so I want to do less of whatI don't like.
I'm going to expand on what I dolike, OK, this really worked.
That did not work at all. OK, we'll do less of what did
not work at all and more of whatdid work.
You know what I mean? It's just contrast.
And that's like for me when I'm,when I'm hearing people that are

(27:45):
like, oh, I just want to step into this.
Just start literally when peopletalk about investing and they're
like. Just start like. 10 bucks is is
better than nothing and I heard it for so many years until I
finally took the advice and invested and we started
investing very small and it did all of a sudden feel like that
feels so good. It is not a huge chunk of change
but I just feel good knowing we've done it.

(28:07):
You'll get the same feeling withthis whether you want to make.
Birdhouses or paint kids faces like just do it.
And just see how you feel and you might realize, actually, I
thought I wanted to do this, butI want to do something
completely different. Or I thought I wanted to do this
for this kind of group of people, but I decided I don't.
I want to do it for this group of people.
It's all the contrast. Just.

(28:28):
Rambled at you for a long time, but no I.
Love that and it's perfect, perfect that the fashion stylist
uses the word contrast it just. Yeah, exactly.
Basically it's just. Do makeup to just just.
Get started, like just start andtry with one little thing or
shadow with one person or talk to one person and just see.
Just start to investigate it andknow it might take courage and

(28:48):
that's OK. That's right.
That's so good. I I I like that approach,
especially for the manifesting generator in me who tries a lot
of. Things you're good at a million
things. Good at or just try a million
things. Stop them when I say like.
No. That's all right.
That's. So many M.

(29:09):
GS I love M GS my my fiance's MG, but it's it you guys have a
superpower. Like you actually can do so many
things at the same time and be really good at them and it
lights you up. Whereas I can't like I have to
like really focus on one completed.
And then I feel good that if I told you you had to just do one

(29:30):
thing for the next 5 years, you would crawl out of your skin
because you're an MG. You'd be like, that's not
actually getting over. You couldn't pay me enough to do
that, which is so cool. Like you are the true
Renaissance woman. And I wish more people
understood that because I think our society has trained MGS to

(29:50):
think you just have ADD, you just have ADHD.
Just finish what you've got going on.
Just complete it. And it's, it's so inaccurate.
Don't finish it. If you are not lit up currently,
don't finish it. Do something else.
We worked with a human design person that gave the best idea
to my fiance for MGS, which was create a menu, like just create

(30:12):
a menu of things. Create appetizers.
Those are like your 5 to 10 minute things.
Create main courses that's like one to two hour things and
create like desserts, something fun that you could just do and
look at how much you time you have for the next whatever
amount of time you're sitting atyour desk.
OK, I've got 30 minutes. All right, I'm going to pick an
appetizer. Which one sounds good right now?

(30:33):
It's like you guys are. I don't know.
You guys are superheroes in my opinion.
That's so funny that you say that because I actually have
this is the perfect episode. Then to link it in, I have like
a downloadable, I guess a printable thing that I created
that was a calming menu and it was so similar.
It was like the, like you said, you know, 5 minutes or less full

(30:57):
day, multi day, like it was all these different ways to calm
down. And then I I within each
category organized by price, youknow, like 5 minutes of breath
work is free. But yeah, 5 minutes of a head
massage at the airport, it might, might actually cost you
10 bucks, but love that. Yeah, yeah, definitely like

(31:17):
that. That's awesome.
A menu that's it's so fun because who doesn't like to eat?
Who doesn't like that idea of like the appetizer of this or
I'm going to indulge and have dessert?
It's so good for manifesting generators like just to be able
to pick and like let yourself gowhere you feel led and be OK
with it. Don't make yourself wrong.
It's OK. Everything we get done.

(31:39):
It was a huge paradigm shift forme to learn that about myself
because, you know, I said it a second ago, but the word quitter
was thrown at me from so many different directions of like,
can't you just stick with something?
Like, why do you start and stop,Start and stop.
And just the amount of collections of things around me
that, you know, there was the craft of the scrapbooking area

(32:02):
and there was the painting area,the beating area.
But then I and my knitting, don't forget my fabric stuff.
But then there was also, you know, maybe I'm gonna write
poetry, all the baking stuff. Like there were just so many
different activities going on. Yeah.
That one could sit and say like,why can't I just stick with
something versus? Because you have a superpower,

(32:24):
you know, the guy that made, I think it was a guy that created
human design, created it for parents so that they could
better understand their children.
I'm like, that's so good becausethose kids are going to be so
much more confident and solid inwho they are because they won't
have a parent that's like, just finish it.
No, you have to finish that coloring page.

(32:45):
And these kids are like, I don'twant to.
I'm done. As a generator, I did.
I wanted to finish the coloring page until it was complete.
I want it to be perfect. That's also the Type A, but
they're just different kids. And so I love that he created
that. I want to say it's a guy now I'm
like questioning myself but. You know what, I looked up my
kids so many different times andI'm forgetting what they are

(33:06):
now. I feel like I should maybe write
that on the wall of the house sothat I'm constantly reminded,
you know, get off his back for doing that.
That's just as my one of my son's favorite expressions like
just built like that so. And he's.
Right, he's right. I just need to figure out how is
he built again? What did the moon?

(33:28):
Say kids like in those formativeyears of like 0 to 5 or 0 to 8,
being able to really cultivate whatever they are.
Like imagine having a parent when you're a kid and you're
like, don't you don't want to color anymore.
Being like, OK, what do you wantto do next?
Like that would have been so free.
I look at some of these coaches,you know, women that I admire
and I'm like, God, I wonder whatit's like to be that person's

(33:52):
kid because they're so evolved. They're so they've they're so
expanded in their vision. What it must be like when that
kid sits at the table and like you said, says I'm done
coloring. No, I don't want that to eat.
I forget if it was you who said it now or someone else that I
listened to on a podcast that was talking about agency and

(34:15):
self trust. And you know when you say I'm
still hungry and the parent says, no, you're not, you just
had dinner. Was that you?
It wasn't me, but I I totally agree with that.
OK, so I just heard someone say that how we're taught from such
a young age not to trust ourselves because, you know,
here we finish dinner and we sayto the parent or the the

(34:38):
caregiver guardian, I'm still hungry.
No, you're not. You just ate that huge plate of
food. You're not hungry.
You're bored, you're thirsty, you're overtired.
And it's like what it must be like to be raised by the parent
who's like, oh, OK, here's more beauty.
That's fine. What would you like?
Yeah, exactly. I mean, I will tell you those

(34:58):
women that you look up to are definitely constantly growing
and evolving themselves. Like they're obviously having
parent moments too that are like.
You know, but it is incredible to watch our friends that have
kids that have done that work and like you said, the people
that you know, it's it's a powerful experience and there's

(35:18):
a lot of people that I now look up to when and think about for
when Cody and I want to adopt ofGod.
I I really want a parent like that.
It is so. Because you can see the.
Result in the kids, you know, like kids that have thing 11
friend specifically that, you know, for a lot of years her son
had real big emotional, not outbursts, but just like

(35:43):
meltdowns kind of you know, likemaybe he's hungry, maybe he's
tired. And I was so used to seeing
parents that'd be like, go to your room.
Knock it off, yeah. Knock it off.
That's not OK. That's about 3.
Yeah, exactly. That's not how we act.
And seeing her parent and get down on, you know, at his level,

(36:04):
look him in the eyes and say, I can see you've got really big
feelings. And I know it must feel really
scary and it must feel really uncomfortable.
And is there any way you could tell me about those really big
feelings? And no, OK, that's OK.
Would you like a hug? No.
OK. That's like, it was just like so
good to be like, yeah, treat your child.

(36:28):
PhD. Parenting.
Yeah, that's exactly good. Exactly.
Exactly. I feel like high school dropout
parenting and that's that's. Listen, here's my other theory.
We're all OK. We were raised in real weird
ways and we're all OK. I know, I know.
I look at my kids. I'm like you'll be fine, you'll
be fine. I know I did so many things
wrong, you'll be fine. So maybe my daughter would be

(36:50):
better off with some distance asopposed to me coming in the door
and door. I don't know.
Maybe just go once every other month?
God, that sounds. That sounds a little.
I mean, you won't want to go in the winter at all, so it's fine.
I am used to this weather. Keep in mind you wouldn't want
to go. In the winter.
But where do you live now? I'm in new.
Hampshire. Oh God, yeah, you're never mind.

(37:14):
You're. Used to even worse.
I was going to say, if you're like a little South, it's just,
I don't know, Boston winters were brutal.
That wind would just feel like it was cutting you open.
Yeah, that is the yeah, yeah. Yeah, New Hampshire, you're used
to it. But you know, from a fashion
perspective, just wear a bigger sweater, wear a bigger coat.

(37:36):
Oh my God, as long as you have, I still think I need to write
this book. I was going to write because I
moved from the lower part of thecountry.
I want to say the South. So people are like she's a
Southerner. I know I'm not a Southerner.
I get it. But anyway, I moved from South
of Massachusetts and I wanted towrite this book called the
Southern guide to moving up North.

(37:58):
Because what people don't realize is as long as you have
the right items, you'll be OK. And the right items are not like
a knitted Old Navy scarf. That's not going to do Jackal
for you. Like you need to have legit
things. You need to have a, something
covering your head. You need to have actual gloves,
You need to have an actual scarfand nothing with holes in it.

(38:18):
I, I mean, I can go down this whole list where there's like,
as long as you have the right pieces and there's probably like
I would say 5 critical pieces. Boots.
Boots and a jacket is what I wasgoing to say.
And get a jacket that zips and buttons.
This is not like the time to just throw your jacket.
Keep it open. No, you will zip it and have it

(38:38):
go at least mid thigh like the length.
Yes. Mid thigh maybe?
None of these like cute cropped parkas.
No worthless, worthless. You're going to, your butt's
going to freeze. It's not.
There's no point. Just don't wear it at that
point. No it needs to go at least mid
thigh if not longer depending onhow much you walk outside I
would say. I know.

(38:59):
I brought probably could have bought stock and cuddle duds for
what I purchased before I moved there.
Didn't use them except to go skiing like that's.
You're not wearing cuddle duds every day of the of the week so
you don't need. Those I know, I I ran, I ran, I
jogged for a very brief period of my life.
And there was a woman that I jogged with who was like,

(39:20):
serious. I can.
See Cuddle Duds for that. We we were talking about running
in bad weather and she's like, there's no such thing as bad
weather. There's just bad gear or that's.
A good you're just. Not prepared.
Like if it's raining out, it's only gonna bother you if you go
out in the shorts and T-shirt. But if you're wearing, yeah, if

(39:42):
you're wearing rain gear, then and maybe there's sneakers that
are more waterproof than your day-to-day sneakers.
And yeah, it was just an. Interesting.
I totally. Agree there.
Yeah, it's the same with living in cold weather.
You just need the right gear. Exactly, exactly.
When I go to walk my dogs in themiddle of winter, it's a whole,
it's a whole different get up. Oh yeah, yeah, you want to RIP

(40:02):
it off once you get inside, but yeah.
Oh yeah, yeah. I mean, I wear the spikes on my
boots like it's a whole. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's a thing. Pardon the Interruption, but I
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(40:24):
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(40:46):
And now let's get back to the show.
So. We're going to shift a little
bit. OK.
But I, I like to think that I can segue nicely.
So I'm gonna link this to, well,we were both talking about
successful people or people thatlook like they have it all
together and do personal growth work and just have figured out

(41:08):
the path. It's simple and narrow minded of
onlookers. Me, I'll use myself as an
example just to scroll through social media, see your feed and
say God, she's just she's got her life together.
Everything is has fallen into place like no bumps in that

(41:28):
road. But there's just so much that we
don't see from the the 2D images.
So since becoming a since figuring out your path and
finding a successful niche for yourself, has there been

(41:49):
anything that has derailed you or interrupted the flow for you?
Not a single thing. Yeah.
You're so lucky. How does it feel to be God's
favorite? Yeah, of course, Of course, Of
course. There's been things.
I mean, I could. How much time do we have?
Right. But for the past, probably.

(42:12):
I was saying past three years, you know, we've been navigating
my mom going through kind of a health crisis, which we've come
to determine is dementia, but wedidn't know in the beginning
what was going on. And that was the beginning of
what I like to call a shamanic death in my life and both

(42:33):
personal and professional. And that was life shattering,
earth shattering because everything up to that point in
my life had been done with my whole heart, but also done in
retrospect. I saw it done for yes, impact,
but also there was the ego desire of acknowledgement,

(42:59):
accomplishment, pride. You know, I was really basing my
significance on how many students lives am I impacting?
Yes, but also how many dollars is that bringing into the bank
account and how do I compare with my peers and oh, they're

(43:19):
making a couple million more than me and what does that mean?
And and I need I mean, it was itstarted.
It wasn't like a keep up with the Joneses it because I don't
really fall into that. But what I do fall into is I
always want to be better and notbetter than it's just I want to
be a better me. And so it would be, you know, I
would see friends that were, youknow, a little bit further

(43:39):
beyond me or doing different things.
It was like, God, they're doing such incredible work.
I think I should be going biggerhere.
I think I should be thinking bigger.
And when I started my business, it was not focused on that.
It was focused on how can I helppeople, right?
We talked about the whole thing of how I started out from
medicine into fashion was I wantto help people, I want to help

(44:01):
people, I want to impact people's lives.
I want to make a difference. I want to leave this world
better than I found it. I want to be part of the
solution. But through many years of of
great success, I forgot that part.
And it took this kind of life shattering experience of needing
to be there for my mom to recognize I was building an

(44:27):
empire on on shakier ground thanhow I started it.
Now. Luckily the foundation I started
it on was super strong and was for the right reasons.
So it was it was an adjust of ofwhat I had built.
And that shook me because not only am I dealing with a sick
mother and recognizing that is ahuge shift in my experience

(44:52):
because my mom and I were very close and we would talk all the
time. And all of a sudden I, I didn't
have that anymore. I had someone who was not
recognizing me, you know, sayingreally scary things and
experiencing very scary things. I have to imagine what she was
experiencing was terrifying for her.
And I knew what I was experiencing felt horrible, you

(45:15):
know, And so I was, I, I was living that.
And then because I had to focus on that, we had to basically
sunset the live portions of whatI was doing.
So I was teaching and mentoring tons of stylists and in multiple
different courses that I've created.
And I had to complete the live portions of those and turn those

(45:37):
into self studies and kind of build a new business, like
figure out a new way to serve people in a way that would also
allow me to be there for my mom.And when I shut those things
down, the live portions, a pieceof my identity was like
crippled, I mean, just crumbled.And it was probably the best

(46:01):
thing that could have ever happened to me.
I would have told you that at the time.
At the time, it felt like I wasn't going to survive it.
And I didn't know how I would possibly survive it, Not just
because I was worried about, youknow, what happens when we don't
have millions of dollars coming in from these courses.
But it was it was like, who am I?
Like, who am I without this? Who am I without all of these

(46:25):
significant things that I think are so important Now?
Luckily, and this is a huge thing that I hope your listeners
will will take if you hear nothing else today.
Luckily, I had surrounded myselfwith a community of powerful
people, powerful meaning, like connected, you know, like had
done the soul work, had done thepersonal development and were
true friends that were willing to see me in my messy and be

(46:49):
like, we got you. And there is a way out of this
because I was, I was really in that place where you're like, I
know I'm in the forest, but the light doesn't.
Even. Exist outside of this.
So I had surrounded myself with community and surrounded myself
with an incredible mentor and incredible friends, those that

(47:09):
you know and have seen. And those people are very real
and very honest and very whole and very strong and solid.
So yes, they look incredible on their Instagram and yes, they're
doing incredible work, but they also are just like the most
legit beautiful, wonderful people.
Because I'm lucky in that I don't surround myself with

(47:33):
people that are. I don't know if we can cuss on
your podcast, but be essers. OK, so they're not bullshitters.
They're real honest people. And what you see is what you
get. Like there's not they're not
giving you something on Instagram or or TikTok.
That isn't their realness. And there is beauty to that
because I couldn't see that stuff for myself at the time.

(47:54):
And they were able to kind of shed a light for me because like
I said, we, we shut everything down and it was like, I need to
reinvent myself while also beingthere for my mom and navigating
like the, I did an episode on this, but I had to navigate the
fact that I was mourning a parent who's still alive.
But the, the version of her thathad I had known my whole life

(48:14):
was, was gone, like completely gone.
And it felt like overnight. So it felt like I was mourning
her and yet she was still alive,living, breathing and talking to
me. So there were a lot of things
that came from that. There were a lot of things that
felt like I didn't know how I was going to get out of it and I
didn't know how I was going to survive it.

(48:37):
And I'm also very lucky to have the most incredible supportive
fiance possible who was very quick to say she needs to move
in with us. Like, there's just not another
choice because your mom has always asked you to never let
her go into a home. She's afraid of that.
Like there's just, you know, different things around that.

(48:57):
And and we have to take care of her.
You know, you're her only daughter, your only kid and she
took care of you and we got to move around with us.
And that to me was also a whole nother like shift because I had
been living my independent life for many years and now I was
going to turn into a full time caregiver.
So you have me sun setting things in my business.

(49:20):
My identity is crippling on who I am and what I am at as a
business owner. And now I'm turning into a full
time caregiver while still trying to birth a new business,
like create new opportunities. So yeah, have I navigated
anything? Yes.
And like I said before, with failure, it also comes with this

(49:40):
comes with with trying times. It's all part of the contrast
because I could not have become the person I am today without
that contrast. I still would have kept going
about the motions, wash, rinse, repeat.
And I wouldn't have had to do that soul work on like, hang on,
why am I thinking my identity and significance is how much

(50:02):
money I make? That is so fleeting.
It does not matter. Money is literally right now
we're calling it dollars. But what are we going to call it
next year? Like maybe something different?
We don't know. So why am I making that mean
something? And who am I really as a person?
Like, who is Kate really? And what does Kate really care
about? And what does Kate really want
to do? And it was a whole new awakening

(50:26):
for me and I'm so thankful for it.
Like it was the hardest time in my life and it was also the best
time in my life because I would never have.
I've constantly said I like having a growth mindset.
I constantly want to be learningand I constantly want to be
growing. How can I say that, but yet stay
the same, right? So I had to have these times

(50:47):
that were just and sometimes I have to have the boulder.
Like, you know that that thing about if you're not getting the
lesson, you'll get a little Pebble thrown at you and you're
not getting it, you'll get a lota rock.
You're really not getting the boulder.
A lot of times I need the boulder, unfortunately.
So the boulder hit and it was like, oh God, I have I have some

(51:07):
work to do here. And it was probably the best
work I've done my whole life. Wow, I, I, I send you so much
love and gratitude for that story because that is the kind
of thing that connects speakers to audiences, human to human,

(51:30):
that you're not just this prettyface on the screen that you are
a, you know, deep, raw person who has experienced life just
like everybody else. You know, like you said, you're
not God's favorite you or we're all God's favorite.
So none of us is, is, is free from this kind of life
experience. But you mentioned the term soul

(51:53):
work, soul searching. What was it like or how?
What specific kinds of tips can you give to others that worked
for you in that delicate balanceand and exploration of, like you

(52:14):
said, grieving the loss of who your mother was, grieving the
loss of what your business was, grieving the loss of who you as
a business owner and then being able to create something from
it. But also avoiding the common
behavior of head down, ignore the noise, get to work, get it

(52:38):
done because it sounds like you,you didn't tune out the noise,
you were in it and and able to kind of steer that ship through
the rocky waters. Yeah, such a good question.
First and foremost, I'm sure you've heard this before, but
the quickest way to get over something is to is to go through

(52:58):
it, right? So I knew that and I, and I'd
done enough work to know all thecoined terms, all the things
that should be doing. So I had that knowledge.
I had that like book knowledge of it.
But I think what I would really say as far as a tip is kind of
what I was saying a second ago. First of all, who are you
surrounding yourself with? Because there were times where I

(53:22):
literally, I mean, I could tell you so many stories.
There's one that makes me cry almost every time I tell it.
But there was one time where I just didn't know what to do and
I and I didn't know where to go And and and I went into my
fiance and I's bedroom and Cody was reading or something.
And I said, OK, I think I've figured out a really good idea.

(53:43):
And Cody's like, OK, you know, what are you thinking about?
I'm like, what if I went and gota job?
And Cody, I mean, I wish I couldexplain to you the look on
Cody's face. It was like the blood rushed out
of Cody's face and it big eyes. She she was just like, what was
that? And I was like, yeah, I could
go. I mean, I'm incredibly educated.

(54:06):
I've accomplished a lot of things.
I could go like do a consulting or like there's definitely.
And Cody was just speechless. And Cody was like, OK, I just
want you to think on that. Like just think on that a little
bit more. I'm not going to because Cody
also knows not to just shoot something down that I'm that I'm
saying because then I'll want todo it a little bit more.

(54:27):
So Cody was just like, you know,let me just give you space to
think on that. And what I didn't know is at the
same time she had texted my mentor who we are also good
friends with James Wedmore and was basically like an SOS of
like what do I this is what Katejust said, what do I do?

(54:48):
And James said. Your only job right now is don't
let her give up. Don't let her give up on this
process. Don't let her give up on the
business. She's got to keep going.
She's got to keep going through this.
And I'd seen other people aroundme and I also have like a soul
family because we all work with the same shaman.
And part of me that knew I, I didn't know that that had

(55:11):
happened. Cody didn't tell me until until
much later, but I knew if I was looking at these people that
also were on the spiritual journey.
And they're telling me it's going to be OK.
I I believed it because I. Knew that they could.
See something that I didn't see.So number one is who are you
surrounding yourself? But number 2 is sometimes it's
borrowing other people's belief in you because at the time I

(55:33):
didn't believe in myself. It was like, I'll just go get a
job. And that's how and and Cody was
like, I'm going to burn the house down.
Like what are we? What is happening right now?
And I didn't, I didn't like we we're fine, but.
You know, the community and justhaving him there to say this is
your only job, just stick to this.
And Cody did say like, we're going to make this work.

(55:54):
And I didn't know that conversation, right?
Because it was just like, we're going to make this work.
It's going to be OK. And there was another time when
I was in one of my other very good friends, Catherine Zenkina
manifestation babe. I styled her for many, many
years and we were doing a photo shoot.
And so Cody met up with me and Catherine after the photo shoot
and everyone gone home and we were recording a podcast

(56:15):
together and we were super excited about it.
And before we could record the podcast, I just broke down.
It was just like sobfest. And she was like, OK, here's
here's what we're going to do. And not only did she just let me
talk and she, you know, was like, this is going to be OK,
but she gave me like we sat there and did a meditation

(56:35):
together and she was like, we'rejust going to go through.
So it's like who you're surrounding yourself is a is a
big deal. And make sure that they are not
just doing it for the views, youknow, make sure these are the
real people and, and, and what they actually believe because
that kind of stuff is what kept me going.
It was like, OK, I know I can doit.
So yeah. Who you're surrounding yourself

(56:56):
with, first of all, if you're going through something like
this, number 2, borrow other people's belief in you or their
faith or if they're telling you it's going to be OK, borrow that
belief because it is. It is going to be OK.
And then #3 like you pointed out.
Do the work like that is what got.
I mean, granted it took 2 1/2 years, but I like we said

(57:17):
before, I'm a little bit stubborn and I'm a little bit
determined. So some things I was white
knuckling and holding on to until I finally had to let go.
But do the work and don't just head down it because it you're
just delaying the inevitable, you're just prolonging it.
So do the work. What like ask yourself, what is

(57:40):
there for me to learn in this? What is the lesson?
What is the silver lining? Why am I, and this is one of the
questions I get my stylist to ask themselves.
And it's a hard question to answer, but it is one of the
most powerful wise questions youcan ever ask yourself in any
situation is why am I so glad this is happening in exactly
this way at exactly this time? And that's a hard question to

(58:03):
answer when you are in it. Why am I?
So glad this is happening in exactly this way at exactly this
time. And if you can answer that, you
have gained wisdom beyond probably 99% of the population
because you are in that moment finding a reason why you're
happy about it, a reason why you're glad about it.
And you are finding the lessons,you're finding the gifts because

(58:25):
everything there is a gift in everything.
So if you can answer that, you will already start to break free
from some of what feels like crippling suffocation.
You know, you will start to break that open.
You'll start to see the light because now you're finding, I'm
glad because of this and I'm glad because of that.
And I did start to see, I'm gladbecause now I'm not building

(58:47):
more of a business on a shaky foundation.
I'm glad because I had stepped away from who I am.
I'm glad because I'm getting to help my mom in a different way,
like. There were so many.
Things. I could list so many things like
my cousin right before my mom started getting sick, my cousin
who I idolized, I mean, she's why I wanted to be a doctor.
She was a very accomplished physician.

(59:08):
She passed from brain cancer andmy family and I took care of
her. You know, it was happening
during COVID. And I said I did the same work
to myself. Why am I so glad this is
happening in exactly this way atexactly this time?
And then the blessings I saw was.
It was. Probably the only time in
history my entire family was together in such a way, so

(59:31):
united, so loving upon her and loving on each other.
It was such a beautiful time that we'll never get back
because you know, she's passed and other people have passed and
it was just a beautiful time. So I'm so glad of and I know
there's nothing that she would want more because she our family
was everything to her. So there's there's a lot of

(59:52):
things that you can do, but those would be my top 3 tips.
Wow, that's a that's that's a lot to take in now waterboarding
you with things Amazing. It's amazing.
It's so good. This is this is like a master
class on how to get through life.
So now what would your advice beto the person who just heard

(01:00:14):
that story and now says, I can'tanswer that question, Kate, I
don't know. I don't know what I'm glad
about. I don't know how to find glad in
the shitstorm swirling around me.
Yeah, that's such a good question.
There's a couple things you can do. 1 is find something you are
glad about, right? Something that doesn't have any

(01:00:37):
other emotion behind it. So if I'm like, what am I glad
of? What makes me happy?
And I don't, there's no negativethat can come with it.
I might think about my niece andbe like, I'm, she makes me so
happy. I'm so glad for her.
Or I might think about a trip like when Cody and I went to
Sedona. That was such a magical trip.

(01:00:58):
Or my best friend and I went to the South of France.
That was such a magical time. I can picture myself right now
on that patio with her with a glass of rose in my hand.
Like, best trip, you know, Go toa place where you can find
something to be glad about. And it might be a person, it
might be a memory, it might be an item, it might be a pet.
I could think about any of my pets and make them make me super

(01:01:20):
happy. You know, any my, my cat is
sitting here right in front of me and she's like a little
Angel. I call her Angel all the time.
Something like that might make you super glad.
So go to something that you can be glad about to get in the
vibration of, of joy or glad. And then you might be able to
navigate the current situation alittle bit better of why you're

(01:01:40):
glad. That would be the first thing.
The second thing is try to find a way that you can start to
cultivate those feelings every day for yourself.
Meaning, is there something you can do during the day that makes
you glad? Like it does going on a walk
make you joyful or does listening to music make you
joyful? Or maybe just dancing with no

(01:02:01):
choreography, just having fun orsinging whatever.
Is there anything that could make you glad?
And see if you can start to cultivate that within yourself
every day, even just for And there's different theories.
It could be 8 seconds, 13 seconds, You know, there's been
all kinds of theories, but just for a brief time.
It's not like you have to find aglad thing for 24 hours, just

(01:02:23):
even for one minute, right? That's what I would say.
That is so attainable. So yeah, thank you for breaking
off that whole Lego house and just giving us the couple of
blocks to start with. That is magical.
And you know, what's so amazing about this conversation is this

(01:02:43):
just incredibly strong, rich wisdom that comes from someone
who mentor stylist. Like it's we didn't even talk
about fashion, which makes me sointrigued about the work you do
with the people you mentor because I imagine it's not just

(01:03:05):
about how to put outfits together.
I mean, I tell our stylist all the time, but when you're
working with a client, fashion is like 1% of it.
It's, it's truly the psychology and the personal development and
the confidence. That's 99% of it.
It's the, the clothes small part.

(01:03:26):
And it's the same thing with thestylist that I mentor.
I mean, in our, in our membership, sure, we do business
practices. I'm going to give best business
practices. I'm going to tell you how to
build your packages and pricing,But that is 1 to 5% of your
success in business. The 95% is your, your
subconscious, your thoughts, your beliefs, your identity.

(01:03:47):
I mean, it's, it's what you believe you can be successful
at. Another way to say that is to
the extent that you believe you can be successful is to the
extent that you will be. Meaning we hold ourselves back
more than we realize, right? If you believe you can be
successful, you will be. If you believe you will fail,

(01:04:08):
you will because. Our brains are wired to prove us
right. Because being wrong is almost
worse than death to our brains. That is like the absolute worst.
So your brain is wired to prove you're right.
So yeah, when I mentor my stylist, 95% of it at least is

(01:04:28):
what beliefs are running the show.
Let's talk about that first before we even talk about your
packages, because your packages won't matter.
You won't sell them if your brain is saying it won't work.
So let's work on your brain first.
Let's work on your beliefs, yourexperiences, why you are the way
you are. So yeah, it's it's it's a lot
more than just the clothes. And isn't that life?

(01:04:50):
I mean, everything we do is so much bigger than, you know, I've
heard people say don't say I'm not a good cook or I'm not a
gardener. I'm not a this or a that.
It's it's all about what's underneath it and your choice to

(01:05:11):
identify as the person who. Can or can't?
Yeah, because your words are powerful.
Your words become your actions, your actions become your
beliefs, and your beliefs becomeyour reality.
So you have to start with your words.
If you're saying I'm not a good cook, guess what?
You will not be. You will, you will prove
yourself right every single time.
You'll prove yourself right. And I'm not saying a lot of

(01:05:31):
times you were like, yeah, But if you say like, I'm I'm a
millionaire and you're not yet, then that might feel like a lie.
So then my thing is, OK, sure, Ihear you.
And you don't want to say something that you feel like,
well, that's just bullshit. Why am I saying that?
It's not true? So start with things that do
feel true. Like, I love using the term
better and better. So I'm getting better and better

(01:05:53):
at cooking. I'm getting better and better at
knowing where to find recipes. I'm getting better and better at
knowing portion sizes. I'm getting better and better at
walking through the doors that are bringing me closer to being
a millionaire. I'm getting better and better at
being a business owner. Like start saying those things
and allow those words to become your beliefs because then that
becomes your reality. That's it.

(01:06:16):
Yeah. That's it.
Wow. All right.
Well, on that note, I want to give you space to talk about
what's going on in the Kate Taylor world and how people can
follow you. Yeah, so I am at Kate Taylor
Stylist on everything. That's my website, my Instagram.

(01:06:37):
The podcast is the Kate Taylor show.
You can find me anywhere, just Kate Taylor and Stylist.
It'll probably pop up. So yeah, follow me on all the
things. What's going on in our world is
we now have a membership for fashion stylist, which is my
love. I love our memberships for
fashion stylists that are just looking for business growth and

(01:06:59):
community and personal development, kind of all the
things we've been talking about.I do a monthly training and have
community and support and all that.
Super fun and that's kind of themain focus.
I also, you know, have my courses that we talked about and
all that kind of stuff that are self studies now.
But my main thing is really mentoring my stylist in the in

(01:07:20):
the membership. And then we still have styling
clients. So I take very few through the
year. But because we are, we pretty
much have people that just continue on year after year.
And so I don't have a ton of space to take new ones on.
But you know, you can reach out if you're looking for a stylist
and everything, like I said, is on the website, but really just
go follow me on Instagram. That's where most of my stuff

(01:07:42):
is. And you'll see different quotes,
like what you've heard me say, and repost them.
You can tell me what you got from this episode.
I love DMS so yeah, just Kate Taylor stylist on most things.
I love it. I love it.
There were so many good things in this.
All right, so now's the point where I invite you to raise a
glass so that nice so that we can say cheers like these ladies

(01:08:07):
right behind me say cheers to this is this is this is my test
is finding the thing that stuck out the most in my brain.
OK. I'm torn.
I mean, contrast, that's you. So we're going to say cheers to
appreciating the contrast and getting better and better at

(01:08:30):
whatever we desire. Cheers, I love that.
Cheers. Cheers.
Yes to you and everything you'vebeen through, everything that
you represent and have shared. I am so grateful and I wish you
nothing but continued success ineverything you you choose to do

(01:08:51):
and upcoming nuptials and and all the goodness.
Thank you so much. It's been such a pleasure being
here. How fun to talk to a brilliantly
talented fashion stylist about things other than fashion.
Isn't that interesting? I love how these conversations
go. Now before I get into Kate's
Notes from the Sidelines, I wantto mention that in the show

(01:09:12):
notes you will find a link to myCom menu.
I had originally turned this theMom Com menu because moms
usually need a little guidance toward finding opportunities to
get calm. But really, this is for
everyone. So I hope you will click that
link and grab yourself this handy menu of peaceful

(01:09:34):
activities. Now, getting into Kate's Notes
from the sidelines #1A secret hack to getting a job offer to
do anything is showing your value.
Show the interviewer, show the company, show the organization
the holes that need to be filledby you #2 if there's something
other than what you're currentlydoing that will bring you

(01:09:55):
complete fulfillment, do that. Because if it's not a fuck yeah,
it's a fuck no. And side note, there are
actually some very cool ways to physically assess whether
something is a yes or a no. You can feel it in your body.
There's some cool somatic practices that I can share with
you if you're interested #3 To chase passions requires courage.

(01:10:18):
But let's be clear, having courage does not mean you don't
feel fear. It's feeling the fear and doing
it anyway #4 Let's reframe failure into what Kate calls
contrast. It's doing things, seeing what
happens, seeing how you feel, and then pivoting if necessary
#5. And while this is literal, it

(01:10:39):
could actually be an analogy forlife.
As long as you have the right gear, you'll be OK in the cold
weather. So take that however you'd like
#6. Get yourself some good true
friends who will see your messy and be there for you and love
you through it #7 Personal tragedy can often lead to a
pivoting and reinvention. And in a future time, we could

(01:11:03):
find ourselves saying that the hardest thing we went through
was actually the best number 8. The quickest way to get over
something is to go through it. We cannot avoid feeling the hard
feelings #9 To deal with hardship, Kate recommends
surrounding yourself with good people, borrowing other people's

(01:11:24):
belief in you and doing the work.
Asking yourself, what is there for me to learn here?
She says, why am I so glad this is happening in exactly this way
at exactly this time? So maybe try that one out.
Number 1095% of success in business is the subconscious
stuff, the thoughts and beliefs we carry with us.

(01:11:45):
Just like the majority of fashion styling work is about
confidence and emotions, not theclothes.
And #11 to the extent you believe you'll be successful,
you will be. We hold ourselves back far more
than we realize. It's that old expression,
whether you can or can you're right or something like that,

(01:12:06):
because our brains want to be right.
So thank you, Kate Taylor, for coming on, sharing your
vulnerable story and being an example for the rest of us.
And with that, I want to remind you all that as I step into my
new role as a vegan lifestyle coach, I want to invite you to
consider what that would look like for yourself.

(01:12:26):
Have you ever thought about veganism?
Have you heard someone talk about it?
Maybe you saw it in a movie documentary, read it in a book,
and you thought, huh, I wonder what that would be like?
Or maybe you thought, Gee, this would probably be so good for
me, but how would I even begin? How could I give up the cheese?
What would my? Social life look like.

(01:12:47):
Where will I get my protein? It sounds so restrictive and
isolating. As a coach, I am here to guide
you through all of those doubts and fears, all of those
legitimate concerns, and simply support you emotionally, with
strategies and with love and compassion.
Because that, my friends, is what veganism is all about.
So please head to gentlecoaching.com/veganism.

(01:13:11):
You can join my program or you can set up a free coaching call
to see what this would look like.
It's all there at gentlecoaching.com/veganism.
The link is in the show notes. And I'm so grateful that you
were here listening. I hope you will share this
episode with a friend. And be sure to tune back in next
week for my conversation with another fashion stylist, my

(01:13:34):
friend Melanie Lipman. And she will talk about clothes
and also the emotional baggage that we all wear.
You like that pun? All right, my friends, have an
amazing week. Cheers to you.

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95 - Stylist Kate Taylor talks passion and pivots

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}95 - Stylist Kate Taylor talks passion and pivots