April 16, 2024 • 17 mins
When was the last time you truly reached out to someone struggling with their mental health? Join me as I embark on a solo journey through the complex terrain of our psyche. This episode is as upfront and raw as they come, as I navigate this path alone, without the usual back-and-forth with guests, a reflection on the power of communication unfolds—a reminder that sometimes, all it takes is a message or a check-in to potentially save a life.
The episode takes a turn down a darker alley when we confront suicide awareness head-on. I share a piece of myself, discussing my father's passing and my personal bouts with chronic suicidality, while weaving in the importance of breaking the silence that so often surrounds depression. You'll hear why a listener's concern, like April's, is not just heartwarming but could be life-changing. The dialogue may drift into the realm of dark humor and personal anecdotes, but the undercurrent is clear: openness about such tough subjects can be a lifeline. So, let's talk, let's laugh, and most importantly, let's listen—because this is a conversation about mental health that aims to resonate with you on a human level, offering both solace and understanding.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to the Fuzzy Mike, the interview series, the
podcast, whatever Kevin wants tocall it.
It's Fuzzy Mike.
Hello, and thank you forjoining me.
I'm your host, kevin Kline,welcoming you to the Fuzzy Mike,
where today we're going tolearn how to ask someone if
they're doing okay mentally.
No guest book today, but I dohave some cool guests lined up
(00:25):
over the next few weeks.
Can't wait for you to hear them.
I much prefer having guestsbecause I love the art of
conversation and I also learnthings from my guests.
When I don't have one, you'resubjected to my thoughts.
So that's what you're gettingthis week.
If you haven't listened to theepisode with Bobby Sexton, I
encourage you to set some timeaside and check it out.
(00:47):
I'm on record describing it asthe most important episode I've
done for mental health andpersonal development.
Bobby's a mental performancecoach and in the conversation he
describes his tumultuousupbringing and how he overcame
it to become a performance coachwho has worked with seven NFL
Hall of Famers.
He gives us concreteinformation on the workings of
(01:10):
the brain and how we can bementally stronger.
We can be as mentally tough asMichael Jordan in Tiger Woods.
Bobby tells us exactly how todo it.
The episode was so powerful thatmy Aunt Julie she herself is a
licensed therapist she messagedme and said, quote great
interview.
And I don't think she just didthat because I'm her nephew by
(01:34):
marriage.
I think she actually believedit.
Now, not having a guestcertainly isn't from a lack of
trying.
I solicit dozens of people eachweek and I find these potential
guests through articles andnews stories and TV interviews
and other podcasts, like, forexample, after the women's
national championship basketballgame.
After the tournament, actually,I saw the postgame news
(01:56):
conference with LSU's AngelReese and she was talking about
her career in college hoops, thedemands and the negative
comments directed at her.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
I've been through so much, I've seen so much, I've
been attacked so many timesdeath threats, I've been
sexualized, I've been threatened.
I've been so many things andI've stood strong every single
time.
And I just try to stand strongfor my teammates because I don't
want them to see me down andlike not be there for them.
So I just want to always justknow like I'm still human, like
(02:33):
all this has happened since Iwon the national championship
and I said the other day Ihaven't had peace since then.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
I like Angel Reese.
I like Angel Reese a lot and,yeah, she has gotten a ton of
flack over the past 14 months.
I thought she'd be a greatguest to help us navigate the
toxicity of social media.
So I looked her up on socialmedia and sent her a message
After I read the cover storylast week of the new issue of
Women's Health Magazine.
Yeah, I reached out to MeganThee Stallion.
(02:57):
In the article she's verycandid about her battles with
depression.
This isn't the first time.
Megan's led us on the inside ofher own mental health Hell.
Just listen to her song Cobra,you'll hear what she goes
through.
Speaker 2 (03:15):
It's a great song.
Speaker 1 (03:16):
Do I expect to hear back from either of these
individuals?
Nope, not at all.
I even say that in myintroduction to them.
Here's why I won't hear backfrom them.
Frankly, the fuzzy mic justisn't big enough.
That's the truth, which is oneof the reasons why I'm immensely
grateful when any guest joinsme here.
It was the same way when I wason the radio when I was working
(03:37):
in Columbia, missouri.
There was no way an A-listperformer was going to come on
my show.
The audience size was just toosmall.
In Houston different story wehad our pick of guests big name
guests practically every day.
We also had a weekly audiencesize of 1.1 million listeners.
(03:59):
Listen, by mentioning names, Iam not trying to call anybody
out.
I'm merely illustrating thelevel of guests I'm trying to
get to give you the mostimpactful listening experience.
This really is all about yougiving you entertaining and
useful mental health discussion.
Well, that's what the FuzzyMike is all about.
Now, while I was on Instagram,I did have some messages sent to
me that I wanted to share withyou.
(04:20):
That's one way you can connectwith me.
There's also Facebook X andemail thefuzzymike at gmailcom.
I very much appreciate feedback, comments and suggestions.
I'm not good at all withnegativity, especially when it's
directed at me or the show, butif you have to go there, well,
at least you felt compelledenough to share your opinion.
(04:43):
One of the Instagram messagesthat I got was from my neighbor
when I was growing up in StLouis.
She and I haven't spoken toeach other in like well geez.
I left 36 years ago to go tocollege.
Haven't been back.
Lisa wrote I've been followingyour journey the last few years.
I like what you're doing in themental health space with your
podcast.
She's offered to put me intouch with some potential guests
(05:05):
and I'm thankful.
I also got this message and itpuzzled me.
It was someone who doesn'tfollow me and whom I don't
follow.
It read you're not the real atKevin Kline official.
Okay, first, my Instagramhandle is Kevin Kline.
Okay, first, my Instagramhandle is Kevin Klein.
Nowhere do I claim to be KevinKlein official, even though my
(05:28):
name is Kevin Klein and myInstagram is officially mine.
But this post got me wonderingwhy even go through the energy
and effort to send this message?
What was the purpose and whatwas this person trying to
accomplish by sending it?
An amateur sleuth?
Like they cracked the case ofKevin Kline official Instagram
(05:50):
account.
If that was the purpose, okay,they succeeded.
Yeah, they found out that I'mnot Kevin Kline official, but I
don't claim to be, so bravo toyou.
No-transcript is that thisperson was only trying to stir
up some shit.
I didn't respond.
I'm not going to take the baiton that.
If you're new to this podcastor to my life as a broadcaster.
(06:13):
Thank you for checking out thefuzzy mic.
I hope you stick around.
Anyway, there's this AcademyAward-winning actor named Kevin
Kline.
He won the Oscar for BestSupporting Actor for A Fish
Called Wanda.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
And the Oscar goes to Kevin Kline.
In A Fish Called Wanda, and theOscar goes to Kevin.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
Kline and A Fish Called Wanda Because we share
the same name.
I get mistaken for him a lot.
Just on Instagram alone, I'dsay about 20% of my messages
confuse me for him.
I've never been bothered by it.
Even if we weren't related, Istill wouldn't be bothered by it
.
Yes, kevin is my uncle, his dadand my grandpa the same person.
(06:56):
His mom and my grandma not thesame person.
Yes, that makes him a halfuncle.
But when I spoke to Kevin earlyin his career when his movie
Sophie's Choice with MerylStreep came out I think I was in
like the sixth grade I flat outasked him, as young kids do,
what do I call you?
He said I'm your uncle.
(07:16):
So I've always referred to himas that His dad and my dad's dad
same person.
But I've never known that sideof the family.
For me that's a disappointment.
It's a real tragedy.
I've spoken to my other twouncles on that side of the
family, but nothing ever indepth.
The one uncle I've had the mostinteraction with, and that's to
(07:38):
say we met at my grandfather'sfuneral and exchanged a couple
of emails afterwards he's aprivate investigator.
That kind of stuff fascinatesme.
Maybe you've surmised that basedon the few true crime episodes
I've had here on the Fuzzy Mike.
So you're scratching your headright now, klein.
What's the purpose of thisrambling?
Surely it's not just to namedrop your famous family, is it?
(08:00):
No, how could doing that relateto mental health and personal
development?
It wouldn't.
The purpose of talking aboutthis is to show how I, pretty
much Mr Negative, turned aperceived negative into a
positive.
See, when I read that commenton Instagram, my reaction was
okay, you're a dick.
(08:21):
But then, when I decided totalk about it here on the fuzzy
mic, what gave me an opportunityto think about that side of my
genetic makeup?
And it got me thinking about mydad.
As sad as this might sound,those are two thoughts I rarely
have.
I've long resigned that I knowas much about my paternal
grandfather and uncles and auntas I ever will.
(08:43):
As for thinking about my dad,had it not been for this comment
, I truly believe that I wouldhave forgotten that this week is
the 19th death anniversary ofhis suicide.
I actually had to text mysister for the date.
April 19th 2005.
He became the fifth person inhis bloodline to kill themselves
(09:03):
.
You don't think that's aninherited trait?
And that leads me to the othermessage that I got.
April was listening to the otherpodcast I'm a part of the
Tunneling Line Show, the one Ico-host with my longtime radio
partner, tim Tuttle.
We post new episodes everyWednesday Shameless plug.
Anyway, april was concernedabout what she heard from me.
(09:25):
During our last episode we weretalking about prison.
We were talking about prison.
We were talking about if Godgave us the choice of how we
could die and we were talkingabout the start of my comedy
routine, if I ever decided to doone.
April wrote do we need to beconcerned about you, klein?
In an 85-minute conversationyou talked about suicide four
(09:46):
times.
In an 85-minute conversationyou talked about suicide four
times.
Like, not about suicide in ageneral sense, but about you
specifically, just making sureyou're okay First.
Thank you for that message,april.
That's super cool to me on acouple of levels.
That you would be listening soastutely that you would be able
to point that out.
Well, that's impressive.
That you would care enough tosend this message touches me
(10:10):
deeply.
I've taken the 85-minute episode.
I've edited it down tohighlight the four instances
that April's talking about.
You know, say something were tohappen to you, kev, what kind
of prisoner would you be.
I mean, you would probably besomebody's bitch real quick.
No, I will unequivocally tellyou this and I am not
bullshitting in the slightest ifI were ever sentenced to prison
(10:32):
, I would kill myself really.
Oh yes, sir, I am not spendinga minute in in jail.
Top three ways to die.
If you can script out thescenario, oh wow, top three ways
to go.
If, if god came to you and saidkevin, I like you, you've done
good here with all thechildren's and the pediatric
(10:54):
cancer and the running and allthat shit, I'm gonna let you
choose your way out.
Uh, okay, um, geez, this couldget a little morbid.
Yeah, you think and this is nota therapy session for Klein but
you drink yourself into astupor, okay, until you pass out
(11:18):
, and then you put a plastic bagover your head.
Well, why?
Well, because you're not goingto feel it, and then you're just
going to suffocate.
You're already drunk and passout, and then you have the bag
over what.
That's suffocating is no way togo man you're not gonna.
you're not gonna feel it, though, because you're already passed
out from drinking.
That's the first one you comeup with.
(11:39):
Yeah, I'm scared of the nexttwo.
Man, uh, the next two.
You could either do uh, a, um,well, this is interesting.
And you're going to be like,wow, climb, what rabbit hole
were you down?
Uh, cyanide pill.
Or you could take like athousand apple seeds, crush them
up, because, uh, supposedly,somebody who is 180 pounds, if
(12:01):
you did 200 apple seeds crushedup, that's the equivalent of one
cyanide pill, is it really?
Yeah, that's what I read Now.
I don't think so.
I think you need more than a200.
And what is the exact poisonthat is made from that?
Cyanide, cyanide.
So that's homemade cyanide fromapple seeds.
(12:23):
Apple seeds, yes, shit.
I want to give you my opening,uh, my opening comedic line.
It would set the tone for theentire evening, okay.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
Are you sure?
Speaker 1 (12:35):
you want to give me this, yeah, yeah, and I'm not
sure I'll take it because I ohno no, no, you wouldn't.
It wouldn't fit in your, itwouldn't fit in your.
Okay, this is what you would do.
Yeah, so I would just come outand I'd be like, yeah, thanks.
I just hate it when people comeup here and they talk about
(12:55):
their families.
We don't fucking know them.
What makes your family soimportant that you got to talk
about them?
So my dad, my dad committedsuicide.
I know we were just as shockedas you.
This man had no skillswhatsoever, yet he was able to
fashion a noose out of anextension cord.
And does he get the irony?
Did he get the irony that he'sending, he's shortening his life
(13:19):
with something that was used toextend?
Oh my God, dude, that'shilarious.
Until April pointed this out inher message, I hadn't even
thought about this connection.
Now, hearing it together andnot spread out over the entire
episode, yeah, I can see howthat might erase some concerns.
That was not my intention.
(13:40):
None of that was a cry for help.
I'm actually in a really goodheadspace lately, have been for
a couple of months.
It's been so good that I'mfearful of the next crash,
because I usually equate how badthey'll be by how good the up
has been, and this has been apretty lengthy up phase, so I
(14:00):
can only imagine how low thenext pit is going to be, and I
don't know what's going to setit off either.
Low the next pit is going to beand I don't know what's going
to set it off either.
That's another aspect ofdepression and chronic
suicidality that is scary.
I mean, if you knew thetriggers, you could just
eliminate them and not have todeal with a depressive episode.
Wouldn't that be amazing?
But for me there's no rhyme orreason to what causes my lows.
(14:22):
The other explanation to whatyou've heard is that's just my
life Living with a diagnosis ofchronic suicidality.
It's a constant thought, eventhough I think about it all the
time.
I'm in a spot right now where Idon't want to do it.
I'm that well adjusted at themoment and talking about it out
(14:44):
loud, I think it's actually agood thing For me.
It allows me to exercise thatdemon, to release that stifling
negativity.
It's when I don't talk about it, that's when there's likely a
problem.
April totally did the rightthing, messaging me and asking
if I needed help.
That's what you should do ifyou sense someone is struggling,
(15:06):
asking if I needed help.
That's what you should do.
If, in a sense, someone isstruggling and what April did,
citing examples of what I saidthat made her wonder.
That was brilliant, it wasperfect.
When we're going throughepisodes, we're likely to
question why there's concern.
Where is this coming from?
What do you mean?
No, I don't need help or wantto talk to anyone.
(15:30):
Those are typical reactionswhen we're approached by someone
concerned about us.
We react that way becausedepression in itself is a
secretive condition.
That's what I'm trying tochange here with the fuzzy mic.
Depression is secretive becauseit typically leads us into
isolation.
We don't want to be aroundanyone and it deteriorates
communication.
We just don't have the energyto talk or open up, and when
(15:55):
we're depressed, the last thingwe feel is worthy of help,
concern or compassion we'reblinded by our misery.
So April, pointing out thestatements I made, that got her
wondering that let me know thather concerns weren't baseless.
If you suspect someone's goingthrough a depressive episode and
(16:15):
might be on the verge ofself-harm and you want to ask
them how they're doing, givethem an example of something
they've said or how they'reacting that has you concerned.
That could be the differencebetween getting a real answer
and not our typical, I'm fine.
Thank you for listening.
If you'd be so kind to givethis a rating, maybe even a
(16:36):
review, like Desi did, man, Iappreciate it.
You can help grow the FuzzyMike audience by sharing it with
your friends and family.
The bigger we grow, the bettershow I can deliver for all of us
.
The Fuzzy Mic is hosted andproduced by Kevin Kline.
Production elements from ZachSheesh at the Radio Farm.
Social media director is TrishKline.
I know this episode wasn't veryfunny, but for your weekly dose
(17:00):
of hilarity, listen to theTuttle Kline podcast with new
episodes every Wednesday Nextweek on the Fuzzy Mic.
I couldn't be happier.
I am so excited to bring you aguest who, on the surface,
seemingly has it all Actress,author, former Playboy playmate
but as we'll find out,appearances can be deceiving.
(17:22):
Thank you for listening.
I'll see you next week.
That's it for the Fuzzy Mike.
Thank you.
The Fuzzy Mike with Kevin Kline.
Welcome to the Fuzzy Mike, the interview series, the
podcast, whatever Kevin wants tocall it.
It's Fuzzy Mike.
Hello, and thank you forjoining me.
I'm your host, kevin Kline,welcoming you to the Fuzzy Mike,
where today we're going tolearn how to ask someone if
they're doing okay mentally.
No guest book today, but I dohave some cool guests lined up
(00:25):
over the next few weeks.
Can't wait for you to hear them.
I much prefer having guestsbecause I love the art of
conversation and I also learnthings from my guests.
When I don't have one, you'resubjected to my thoughts.
So that's what you're gettingthis week.
If you haven't listened to theepisode with Bobby Sexton, I
encourage you to set some timeaside and check it out.
(00:47):
I'm on record describing it asthe most important episode I've
done for mental health andpersonal development.
Bobby's a mental performancecoach and in the conversation he
describes his tumultuousupbringing and how he overcame
it to become a performance coachwho has worked with seven NFL
Hall of Famers.
He gives us concreteinformation on the workings of
(01:10):
the brain and how we can bementally stronger.
We can be as mentally tough asMichael Jordan in Tiger Woods.
Bobby tells us exactly how todo it.
The episode was so powerful thatmy Aunt Julie she herself is a
licensed therapist she messagedme and said, quote great
interview.
And I don't think she just didthat because I'm her nephew by
(01:34):
marriage.
I think she actually believedit.
Now, not having a guestcertainly isn't from a lack of
trying.
I solicit dozens of people eachweek and I find these potential
guests through articles andnews stories and TV interviews
and other podcasts, like, forexample, after the women's
national championship basketballgame.
After the tournament, actually,I saw the postgame news
(01:56):
conference with LSU's AngelReese and she was talking about
her career in college hoops, thedemands and the negative
comments directed at her.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
I've been through so much, I've seen so much, I've
been attacked so many timesdeath threats, I've been
sexualized, I've been threatened.
I've been so many things andI've stood strong every single
time.
And I just try to stand strongfor my teammates because I don't
want them to see me down andlike not be there for them.
So I just want to always justknow like I'm still human, like
(02:33):
all this has happened since Iwon the national championship
and I said the other day Ihaven't had peace since then.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
I like Angel Reese.
I like Angel Reese a lot and,yeah, she has gotten a ton of
flack over the past 14 months.
I thought she'd be a greatguest to help us navigate the
toxicity of social media.
So I looked her up on socialmedia and sent her a message
After I read the cover storylast week of the new issue of
Women's Health Magazine.
Yeah, I reached out to MeganThee Stallion.
(02:57):
In the article she's verycandid about her battles with
depression.
This isn't the first time.
Megan's led us on the inside ofher own mental health Hell.
Just listen to her song Cobra,you'll hear what she goes
through.
Speaker 2 (03:15):
It's a great song.
Speaker 1 (03:16):
Do I expect to hear back from either of these
individuals?
Nope, not at all.
I even say that in myintroduction to them.
Here's why I won't hear backfrom them.
Frankly, the fuzzy mic justisn't big enough.
That's the truth, which is oneof the reasons why I'm immensely
grateful when any guest joinsme here.
It was the same way when I wason the radio when I was working
(03:37):
in Columbia, missouri.
There was no way an A-listperformer was going to come on
my show.
The audience size was just toosmall.
In Houston different story wehad our pick of guests big name
guests practically every day.
We also had a weekly audiencesize of 1.1 million listeners.
(03:59):
Listen, by mentioning names, Iam not trying to call anybody
out.
I'm merely illustrating thelevel of guests I'm trying to
get to give you the mostimpactful listening experience.
This really is all about yougiving you entertaining and
useful mental health discussion.
Well, that's what the FuzzyMike is all about.
Now, while I was on Instagram,I did have some messages sent to
me that I wanted to share withyou.
(04:20):
That's one way you can connectwith me.
There's also Facebook X andemail thefuzzymike at gmailcom.
I very much appreciate feedback, comments and suggestions.
I'm not good at all withnegativity, especially when it's
directed at me or the show, butif you have to go there, well,
at least you felt compelledenough to share your opinion.
(04:43):
One of the Instagram messagesthat I got was from my neighbor
when I was growing up in StLouis.
She and I haven't spoken toeach other in like well geez.
I left 36 years ago to go tocollege.
Haven't been back.
Lisa wrote I've been followingyour journey the last few years.
I like what you're doing in themental health space with your
podcast.
She's offered to put me intouch with some potential guests
(05:05):
and I'm thankful.
I also got this message and itpuzzled me.
It was someone who doesn'tfollow me and whom I don't
follow.
It read you're not the real atKevin Kline official.
Okay, first, my Instagramhandle is Kevin Kline.
Okay, first, my Instagramhandle is Kevin Klein.
Nowhere do I claim to be KevinKlein official, even though my
(05:28):
name is Kevin Klein and myInstagram is officially mine.
But this post got me wonderingwhy even go through the energy
and effort to send this message?
What was the purpose and whatwas this person trying to
accomplish by sending it?
An amateur sleuth?
Like they cracked the case ofKevin Kline official Instagram
(05:50):
account.
If that was the purpose, okay,they succeeded.
Yeah, they found out that I'mnot Kevin Kline official, but I
don't claim to be, so bravo toyou.
No-transcript is that thisperson was only trying to stir
up some shit.
I didn't respond.
I'm not going to take the baiton that.
If you're new to this podcastor to my life as a broadcaster.
(06:13):
Thank you for checking out thefuzzy mic.
I hope you stick around.
Anyway, there's this AcademyAward-winning actor named Kevin
Kline.
He won the Oscar for BestSupporting Actor for A Fish
Called Wanda.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
And the Oscar goes to Kevin Kline.
In A Fish Called Wanda, and theOscar goes to Kevin.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
Kline and A Fish Called Wanda Because we share
the same name.
I get mistaken for him a lot.
Just on Instagram alone, I'dsay about 20% of my messages
confuse me for him.
I've never been bothered by it.
Even if we weren't related, Istill wouldn't be bothered by it
.
Yes, kevin is my uncle, his dadand my grandpa the same person.
(06:56):
His mom and my grandma not thesame person.
Yes, that makes him a halfuncle.
But when I spoke to Kevin earlyin his career when his movie
Sophie's Choice with MerylStreep came out I think I was in
like the sixth grade I flat outasked him, as young kids do,
what do I call you?
He said I'm your uncle.
(07:16):
So I've always referred to himas that His dad and my dad's dad
same person.
But I've never known that sideof the family.
For me that's a disappointment.
It's a real tragedy.
I've spoken to my other twouncles on that side of the
family, but nothing ever indepth.
The one uncle I've had the mostinteraction with, and that's to
(07:38):
say we met at my grandfather'sfuneral and exchanged a couple
of emails afterwards he's aprivate investigator.
That kind of stuff fascinatesme.
Maybe you've surmised that basedon the few true crime episodes
I've had here on the Fuzzy Mike.
So you're scratching your headright now, klein.
What's the purpose of thisrambling?
Surely it's not just to namedrop your famous family, is it?
(08:00):
No, how could doing that relateto mental health and personal
development?
It wouldn't.
The purpose of talking aboutthis is to show how I, pretty
much Mr Negative, turned aperceived negative into a
positive.
See, when I read that commenton Instagram, my reaction was
okay, you're a dick.
(08:21):
But then, when I decided totalk about it here on the fuzzy
mic, what gave me an opportunityto think about that side of my
genetic makeup?
And it got me thinking about mydad.
As sad as this might sound,those are two thoughts I rarely
have.
I've long resigned that I knowas much about my paternal
grandfather and uncles and auntas I ever will.
(08:43):
As for thinking about my dad,had it not been for this comment
, I truly believe that I wouldhave forgotten that this week is
the 19th death anniversary ofhis suicide.
I actually had to text mysister for the date.
April 19th 2005.
He became the fifth person inhis bloodline to kill themselves
(09:03):
.
You don't think that's aninherited trait?
And that leads me to the othermessage that I got.
April was listening to the otherpodcast I'm a part of the
Tunneling Line Show, the one Ico-host with my longtime radio
partner, tim Tuttle.
We post new episodes everyWednesday Shameless plug.
Anyway, april was concernedabout what she heard from me.
(09:25):
During our last episode we weretalking about prison.
We were talking about prison.
We were talking about if Godgave us the choice of how we
could die and we were talkingabout the start of my comedy
routine, if I ever decided to doone.
April wrote do we need to beconcerned about you, klein?
In an 85-minute conversationyou talked about suicide four
(09:46):
times.
In an 85-minute conversationyou talked about suicide four
times.
Like, not about suicide in ageneral sense, but about you
specifically, just making sureyou're okay First.
Thank you for that message,april.
That's super cool to me on acouple of levels.
That you would be listening soastutely that you would be able
to point that out.
Well, that's impressive.
That you would care enough tosend this message touches me
(10:10):
deeply.
I've taken the 85-minute episode.
I've edited it down tohighlight the four instances
that April's talking about.
You know, say something were tohappen to you, kev, what kind
of prisoner would you be.
I mean, you would probably besomebody's bitch real quick.
No, I will unequivocally tellyou this and I am not
bullshitting in the slightest ifI were ever sentenced to prison
(10:32):
, I would kill myself really.
Oh yes, sir, I am not spendinga minute in in jail.
Top three ways to die.
If you can script out thescenario, oh wow, top three ways
to go.
If, if god came to you and saidkevin, I like you, you've done
good here with all thechildren's and the pediatric
(10:54):
cancer and the running and allthat shit, I'm gonna let you
choose your way out.
Uh, okay, um, geez, this couldget a little morbid.
Yeah, you think and this is nota therapy session for Klein but
you drink yourself into astupor, okay, until you pass out
(11:18):
, and then you put a plastic bagover your head.
Well, why?
Well, because you're not goingto feel it, and then you're just
going to suffocate.
You're already drunk and passout, and then you have the bag
over what.
That's suffocating is no way togo man you're not gonna.
you're not gonna feel it, though, because you're already passed
out from drinking.
That's the first one you comeup with.
(11:39):
Yeah, I'm scared of the nexttwo.
Man, uh, the next two.
You could either do uh, a, um,well, this is interesting.
And you're going to be like,wow, climb, what rabbit hole
were you down?
Uh, cyanide pill.
Or you could take like athousand apple seeds, crush them
up, because, uh, supposedly,somebody who is 180 pounds, if
(12:01):
you did 200 apple seeds crushedup, that's the equivalent of one
cyanide pill, is it really?
Yeah, that's what I read Now.
I don't think so.
I think you need more than a200.
And what is the exact poisonthat is made from that?
Cyanide, cyanide.
So that's homemade cyanide fromapple seeds.
(12:23):
Apple seeds, yes, shit.
I want to give you my opening,uh, my opening comedic line.
It would set the tone for theentire evening, okay.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
Are you sure?
Speaker 1 (12:35):
you want to give me this, yeah, yeah, and I'm not
sure I'll take it because I ohno no, no, you wouldn't.
It wouldn't fit in your, itwouldn't fit in your.
Okay, this is what you would do.
Yeah, so I would just come outand I'd be like, yeah, thanks.
I just hate it when people comeup here and they talk about
(12:55):
their families.
We don't fucking know them.
What makes your family soimportant that you got to talk
about them?
So my dad, my dad committedsuicide.
I know we were just as shockedas you.
This man had no skillswhatsoever, yet he was able to
fashion a noose out of anextension cord.
And does he get the irony?
Did he get the irony that he'sending, he's shortening his life
(13:19):
with something that was used toextend?
Oh my God, dude, that'shilarious.
Until April pointed this out inher message, I hadn't even
thought about this connection.
Now, hearing it together andnot spread out over the entire
episode, yeah, I can see howthat might erase some concerns.
That was not my intention.
(13:40):
None of that was a cry for help.
I'm actually in a really goodheadspace lately, have been for
a couple of months.
It's been so good that I'mfearful of the next crash,
because I usually equate how badthey'll be by how good the up
has been, and this has been apretty lengthy up phase, so I
(14:00):
can only imagine how low thenext pit is going to be, and I
don't know what's going to setit off either.
Low the next pit is going to beand I don't know what's going
to set it off either.
That's another aspect ofdepression and chronic
suicidality that is scary.
I mean, if you knew thetriggers, you could just
eliminate them and not have todeal with a depressive episode.
Wouldn't that be amazing?
But for me there's no rhyme orreason to what causes my lows.
(14:22):
The other explanation to whatyou've heard is that's just my
life Living with a diagnosis ofchronic suicidality.
It's a constant thought, eventhough I think about it all the
time.
I'm in a spot right now where Idon't want to do it.
I'm that well adjusted at themoment and talking about it out
(14:44):
loud, I think it's actually agood thing For me.
It allows me to exercise thatdemon, to release that stifling
negativity.
It's when I don't talk about it, that's when there's likely a
problem.
April totally did the rightthing, messaging me and asking
if I needed help.
That's what you should do ifyou sense someone is struggling,
(15:06):
asking if I needed help.
That's what you should do.
If, in a sense, someone isstruggling and what April did,
citing examples of what I saidthat made her wonder.
That was brilliant, it wasperfect.
When we're going throughepisodes, we're likely to
question why there's concern.
Where is this coming from?
What do you mean?
No, I don't need help or wantto talk to anyone.
(15:30):
Those are typical reactionswhen we're approached by someone
concerned about us.
We react that way becausedepression in itself is a
secretive condition.
That's what I'm trying tochange here with the fuzzy mic.
Depression is secretive becauseit typically leads us into
isolation.
We don't want to be aroundanyone and it deteriorates
communication.
We just don't have the energyto talk or open up, and when
(15:55):
we're depressed, the last thingwe feel is worthy of help,
concern or compassion we'reblinded by our misery.
So April, pointing out thestatements I made, that got her
wondering that let me know thather concerns weren't baseless.
If you suspect someone's goingthrough a depressive episode and
(16:15):
might be on the verge ofself-harm and you want to ask
them how they're doing, givethem an example of something
they've said or how they'reacting that has you concerned.
That could be the differencebetween getting a real answer
and not our typical, I'm fine.
Thank you for listening.
If you'd be so kind to givethis a rating, maybe even a
(16:36):
review, like Desi did, man, Iappreciate it.
You can help grow the FuzzyMike audience by sharing it with
your friends and family.
The bigger we grow, the bettershow I can deliver for all of us
.
The Fuzzy Mic is hosted andproduced by Kevin Kline.
Production elements from ZachSheesh at the Radio Farm.
Social media director is TrishKline.
I know this episode wasn't veryfunny, but for your weekly dose
(17:00):
of hilarity, listen to theTuttle Kline podcast with new
episodes every Wednesday Nextweek on the Fuzzy Mic.
I couldn't be happier.
I am so excited to bring you aguest who, on the surface,
seemingly has it all Actress,author, former Playboy playmate
but as we'll find out,appearances can be deceiving.
(17:22):
Thank you for listening.
I'll see you next week.
That's it for the Fuzzy Mike.
Thank you.
The Fuzzy Mike with Kevin Kline.
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