It’s episode 178 of the Gnar Couch Podshow! We’re already three minutes in and the F-bomb counter is higher than your buddy who “microdosed” but forgot the “micro.” Utah probably hates us (again), but that’s fine—Utah also hates fun, women's thighs, and beer over 4%.
But, this isn't your dad’s mountain bike podcast. Actually, your dad probably left because you bought an E-bike, then he joined a Facebook group called Lycra Enthusiasts Who Love Buttholes. Guess what? We’re all you’ve got now.
This episode: memes, caffeine jitters, brown-eye contact, and the unholy truth that “analog” is being horribly mispronounced. Mountain bike culture is dead, and we’re here performing a necrophilia-themed jazzercise class on its stiff little corpse.
Joining us is the meme-lord himself, Ryden Dirty—43 years old, knees like stale breadsticks, and a professional at making Facebook warriors cry into their Garmin watches. He’s an ex-BMXer, chef, and current semi-professional button-pusher. If you get offended by him, congratulations—you’re softer than a Casey’s gas station pizza.
We’ve also got:
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A Zoom room full of Russian bots who keep trying to sell us boner pills.
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Facebook dads with “opinions” so bad they make your uncle’s QAnon posts look reasonable.
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A merch store with more hoodies than a middle school vape circle.
Throw in some ADHD, chef rage, and a bunch of dudes old enough to schedule colonoscopies around bike rides, and you’ve got yourself a certified Gnar Couch dumpster fire.
So grab a chamois, double up if your prostate needs it, and let’s kick this turd downhill. Welcome to Gnar Couch, where joy comes to die and the only KOM we care about is “King of Mediocrity.”
Guest info:
Check out our store for sick shirts. Got to our Patreon and give us money. We've added old episodes, downloadable songs, and give you early access to raw, uncut shows for only $4.20/month. Get 30% off BLIZ sunglasses and more with the code "sponchesmom".
00:00 Couch Crushers Instagram Mishap
07:29 Message Us Anytime
14:55 "Analog Cycling Over E-bike"
18:25 "E-Bike Epiphany"
26:19 "Social Media Free Speech Shift"
28:36 "Embracing Authenticity in Social Media"
35:48 Mountain Biking Frustration Transition
44:03 "Biking Distance Challenges"
46:34 Teasing Chris Canfield
52:57 "E-Bike Antics Spark Controversy"
58:09 Expanding Mountain Biking Stories
01:05:22 Managing Subscriptions and New Content
01:08:00 "Call Us After Ben's Song"
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