There’s a theory that says that because humans were once heavily dependent on one another for survival, our brains are wired to sense fear when we’re at risk of being “on the outs” with society. Centuries ago, it was a literal threat to be ostracized from the tribe. Being banished from the group meant we’d be on our own and vulnerable to attack by predators, and less successful at hunting the food we’d need to survive. While it’s unlikely that being disapproved of by your friends or family would result in death today, this theory says we were created with an internal warning system that hasn’t evolved along with the rest of our brain and thinking, so we continue to be overly sensitive to the approval of others.
We Were Made For Relationship
I’m not so sure that humans just “evolved” in order to survive as a species, but I do believe that our Creator made us with brains that are capable of adapting as the universe evolves. And I for sure believe that we were created for relationship.
Here are some key questions you can ask yourself to help you to stand in confidence rather than fear.
What am I really afraid of here?
What’s at stake? How does what they think impact me?
Do I value this person’s opinion?
Do I value his/her values? Do their values match mine?
Are there areas of my life where it’s okay to not see eye-to-eye with this person?
Can I give this person the grace and freedom to think differently than me?
It can also be helpful to remind yourself that you have options. You can:
Agree to disagree
Explain your thought process or how you arrived at your decision/conclusion
Decline to explain your reasoning
Ask to change the conversation to a different topic
End the conversation completely
Create distance (either temporarily or permanently)
“Let them” be wrong about you
This week we would like to highlight APA if you would like to learn more or donate click the link below https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/stigma-and-discrimination
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The 988 Lifeline
988 is now active across the United States. This new, shorter phone number will make it easier for people to remember and access mental health crisis services. (Please note, the previous 1-800-273-TALK (8255) number will continue to function indefinitely.) https://988lifeline.org/
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