In this episode, Jake and Steve break down a real-world story of a promising project derailed by ego-driven leadership—and how it quietly destroyed the motivation of a high-performing engineering team. If you've ever worked under someone who needed to be the smartest in the room, this one will hit home.
Not theory—practical, tactical advice.
Key Topics Covered:
• How ego can quietly destroy team culture from the top down
• The difference between control and contribution in leadership
• What happens when engineers are shut out of decisions
• The silent cost of “you just do what I say” management
• How loss of ownership drives your best people out the door
• Why even competent leaders can lose team trust
• Spotting toxic patterns before they become the norm
• The “blue on black” tactic for dealing with bad managers
• Learning from bad leadership without internalizing it
• Why engineers must be humble enough to listen—and sharp enough to lead
Actionable Steps:
• Don’t confuse compliance with commitment—listen before leading
• Invite contributions before declaring direction
• Use 1-on-1s to check in on team morale, not just deadlines
• Ask your team, “What am I missing?” and mean it
• Recognize when you're making decisions from fear or ego
• If you’re under a poor manager, extract what lessons you can
• Document examples of what not to do as a future leader
• Maintain professionalism but protect your energy
• Use questions to unlock learning from even difficult leaders
• Create space for others to care by giving them real input
Who This Episode Is For:
• Engineers working under controlling or ego-driven leaders
• Team leads who want to avoid demotivating their crew
• Senior ICs navigating poor management from above
• New managers still developing their leadership voice
Why It Matters:
Poor leadership doesn’t just delay schedules—it drives talent out the door. But even bad examples can teach us how to lead better. Learn how to protect your energy, lead with humility, and become the kind of engineer others actually want to follow.
Where to Listen:
Spotify
Apple Podcasts
Google Podcasts
Or wherever you get your podcasts
If this episode hit home, send it to someone. The Impactful Engineer grows by word of mouth—just like the best careers do.
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