169. How Non-aggressive Is Your Communication? Part 3

Some of the most hurtful communication habits are the ones we’ve been taught to see as normal.

 

In this episode, Alejandra Siroka offers a reflection on four aggressive patterns that often show up in everyday conversations: stonewalling, gaslighting, passive aggression, and name-calling. These aren’t always loud or obvious. Sometimes they sound like silence. Sometimes they come wrapped in sarcasm, or disguised as concern.

 

How do we create safety in our relationships when we’re feeling overwhelmed or misunderstood? What does it take to speak honestly without causing harm?

 

With clarity and compassion, Alejandra shares ways to shift these habits and communicate with more presence, honesty, and care. She reminds us that it’s not about getting it right every time. It’s about noticing what’s happening and choosing to show up differently, one conversation at a time.

 

Quotes

• “Stonewalling generates emotional abandonment. When someone stonewalls, they’re essentially saying your feelings and your needs do not matter enough for me to stay engaged.” (05:14 | Alejandra Siroka)
• “By acknowledging that different people can experience the same situation differently without anyone being wrong, we create the space for multiple truths rather than imposing our own version of reality on others.” (10:44 | Alejandra Siroka)
• “Passive aggression creates confusion and mistrust because it sends mixed messages. You are expressing anger while you are denying you’re angry, making it impossible for others to respond appropriately.” (13:28 | Alejandra Siroka)
• “Direct communication is your remedy. Direct communication doesn’t mean being harsh. It means being clear and kind simultaneously and giving others the information they need to understand you and respond to you.” (15:54 | Alejandra Siroka)
• “When we call another person a name, we’re dehumanizing them. And we stop seeing them as the precious human being with needs and feelings and positive qualities that they truly are.” (18:19 | Alejandra Siroka)

 

Links

Episode 34. Conscious Defending from Gaslighting https://www.languagealchemy.com/podcasts/language-alchemy-podcast/episodes/2147696153 

Choosing True Connection Online Course: https://www.languagealchemy.com/enroll

 

To leave a review on Apple Podcasts, click: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-language-alchemy-podcast/id1576461366

To leave a review on Spotify, click: https://open.spotify.com/show/5yTj9hSotq8EAjPCYg2jYw?si=aQNuoStRQomTNUKHGSD56A&nd=1&dlsi=064dcb42ba8d4706

To work with Alejandra, visit: www.languagealchemy.com/workwithme

To join the Language Alchemy mailing list, visit: https://www.languagealchemy.com

To ask questions you'd like Alejandra to answer in the podcast, visit: https://www.languagealchemy.com/podcastquestion

To find out about 1:1 transformative communication coaching with Alejandra, visit: https://www.languagealchemy.com/oneonone

To find out about couple transformative communication coaching with Alejandra, visit: https://www.languagealchemy.com/couples