December 12, 2022 • 24 mins
Suddenly, a new avenue to give real time advice with feedback occurred to me, and wouldn't you know it, it went pretty fantastically.
See the video version at youtube.com/couldhelp
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Hey guys, it's WSWalker with the Laughing Matters Podcast, and welcome back everybody.
(00:11):
We have an interesting one on the board today.
Now as you guys have probably noticed at this point, I love to give advice, and I'm pretty
good at it.
And in the last couple episodes, I've been giving advice to people who haven't asked
for it.
Like in my nose and all sorts of places.
And most likely, the people that ask the questions that I'm giving advice on, they're never going
(00:35):
to hear the advice on it.
And I thought to myself, you know, this is not ideal, because A, while you guys are benefiting
from the advice, the people that are actually asking for the advice aren't really benefiting
from it.
It's very unlikely they're hearing this right now.
But on top of all that, I don't get to really ask any questions or get any further clarification.
(00:58):
What do you mean by this thing?
Or how long have you two been seeing each other?
Or what was it like growing up with your father alone?
Or, you know, stuff that will help me kind of navigate to the best advice that I can
give, and the advice that would most help the person in the situation.
Because as smart as we are, we ourselves tend to be our blind spot.
(01:22):
And while we may want to think one thing about ourselves, there might be some entirely different
truth to the matter.
And so I thought to myself, I gotta figure out a way so that I'm actually giving advice
to people.
And I seriously almost went to the college down the road and set up a card table with
two mics and just, you know, a sign that said free advice.
(01:47):
And then it hit me.
There is a way to do this.
And in a place that I've already got everything set up to record audio, where I'm not going
to have to edit out the sounds of an entire college behind me, and where there exists
an almost infinite flow of new people to talk to.
(02:10):
And it's at this point that we introduce Omegle into the formula.
A place where at the click of a button, I can be connected to any person.
That's connected on that website.
Now at this point in the recording, I have done a couple of recordings on Omegle and
they've, they've gone pretty well.
You know, there's been some bombing.
(02:32):
Not everybody on Omegle is there for help and not everybody on Omegle wants to be helped.
What's funny is the the biggest troll that I tend to get is somebody that's just basically
ignoring me or they're just playing their music loud and not acting at all affected
by my presence.
Which you know, of course hurts in its own right to have somebody just completely ignore
(02:57):
you.
We've all been there, I'm sure.
But there were several people that seemed to genuinely need some advice.
And so I was able to do that and I was able to do it for the show.
I get everybody that's on here.
I got their permission and I gotta tell you, I absolutely adore this.
(03:18):
So I'll probably be doing more of these.
So without any further ado, I introduce to you Will Helps Omegle.
Connecting in 3, 2, 1, contact.
No, please.
(03:40):
No, no, absolutely not.
Get off my screen.
Oh, sorry.
I thought she was saying no to me.
I was like, I reject you first.
I can promise you, I will give you some of the best advice you've ever had in your life.
Anything for free.
There's one stipulation.
It has to be about something you genuinely, genuinely care about.
(04:05):
Okay, I'm going first.
I have an issue.
How are you with relationship advice?
Perfect.
Okay.
I'm back with my ex and it's like, it was going okay, but things are starting to get
rocky again.
Should I abandon ship or should I stick to it?
(04:27):
Well, I need some more details here.
What was it that broke up the relationship the first time?
I had to break up with him because he was too immature and couldn't express enough affection
towards me.
He never cheated.
He, I don't know, he came back and he was sweet.
He was nice.
I know it sounds bad to say he changed, but he did.
(04:49):
For a while.
It is slipping back into the habit of being not outwardly affectionate.
Okay, so quick fix.
Okay, I would recommend the arm squeeze.
This woman that posted this advice on some channel and it became a really well-known
(05:10):
advice.
You guys were the products of our upbringing.
You know how they do.
It's not manly to share, to fix things that are emotional, only things that are physical.
This therapist, I think I want to say gave him the advice of let him know.
(05:32):
How long were you guys together?
We dated for like six months, then we were broken up for like five months.
So the I love yous have come down.
Yeah.
And you guys genuinely love each other.
Yeah.
Okay.
Let him know that he can squeeze your arm three times or even like leg, whatever, but
(05:53):
just three squeezes in a row.
I love you.
He doesn't have to say it.
Nobody knows what that three squeezes meant, but you guys.
It's a special thing.
And so he's now allowed to say that without that toxic background playing into it at all.
(06:16):
This is a new version of I love you.
He does have a very toxic family.
They're scared.
Oh my goodness.
Think about what would happen to him growing up in that family if he was open with his
emotions and he kind of get a better sense of why he's not.
So find ways around it.
(06:38):
Human beings, human beings are fantastic at figuring out ways to express things.
We find something good.
Our first instinct is to share it.
You know, you find a good meme, you send it to somebody you care about.
And we created a language out of the sounds that we could make with our mouths and the
air in our lungs.
And then we figured out how to make that last after somebody was gone and not saying those
(07:03):
things by creating written language.
And we just kept going and figuring out new ways to push our thoughts at people.
It did well until it hit the abstracts like emotions, emotions are.
But normally there aren't good words for it.
You know, there's some poets that have figured out some really clever ways of saying things
that really hit home.
(07:26):
But we had to turn to more abstracts like art, music, photography, dance.
Give him an interpretive dance to express my emotions.
It's not you're not too far off the mark because when it comes to when it comes to great sex,
like not good sex, what the absolute pinnacle of sex is, is when you are expressing to your
(07:51):
partner something that you cannot find the words for.
That is when sex gets that like.
Those are the people that are just broken after a breakup.
But like that, that can be another place that he can express those affections.
(08:13):
If you can kind of help him understand that like this is this is an option to like you
can sit.
I just pictured Kevin Hart going, say what's your chest?
You can put it out there to him that so long as you're constantly encouraging these new
(08:36):
avenues of expression.
I think this might be good.
Find ways to communicate his feelings that aren't the ways that are the traditional.
Traditional is the ones that got the roadblocks in his emotion.
I like that.
Thank you very much.
It's your turn.
My question might be a little bit.
(08:59):
OK, get ready.
OK, OK.
So.
So my father recently passed away and I had to come home from my school.
I'm studying abroad and I had to come home early and now I'm going back in a week and
(09:22):
a half and like I have to deal with like all these like people in my school.
You know, like they're like new, newly 18 and stuff and like they haven't really dealt
with like these big issues and stuff.
I mean, like they're going to like treat me like they're little like a person.
They're going to be like, I'm so sorry.
Yeah.
(09:42):
So like how I did this at this age, I lost my dad at 16 and he was he was like my he
was he was just this incredible person.
So like I was I was very, very hurt.
Sorry.
I do.
Do you want to keep going or do you want me to start into advice and you can kind of guide
(10:02):
me through the advice?
OK.
Did you ever read Lemony Snicket's series of unfortunate events?
That's like such a good book series.
Very big one on that because he nailed nailed it just better than anybody who has ever written
it that I've seen.
He nailed what it feels like to lose somebody that big in your life.
(10:25):
And suddenly, was it suddenly?
Well, yes.
OK.
The third mention suddenly got no, no, no, not the kids hers.
Yeah.
Oh, no, he it was for like a few years and then like, but we thought he was going to
get better and he did.
OK.
(10:46):
And then suddenly kind of turned for the worse.
Yeah, it all just and I wasn't even home.
I was on the plane and I heard.
Lemony Snicket said that when you lose some money, very important to you out of the blue,
but you're not expecting it.
It's like climbing stairs in the dark and stepping through that last one you thought
(11:07):
was there.
Only stretched over months and you just you feel flipped upside down.
You feel like just the whole world turned on you and it's completely different, but
it's the same.
But it's not ever going to be the OK same.
(11:29):
You know, it's going to be a different kind of same.
That's just not as OK.
He didn't say all of that.
I'm not throwing that.
But I went to school the day going back, I think after four or five days.
(11:49):
And the first person I saw was the person I was most worried about.
I was I was at that point working in a recording studio at the school, like after school hours,
just learning recording studio stuff.
And there was a I was the roadie for one of the high school bands.
(12:13):
And the main lead singer was Joe, this gigantic football player, captain of the football team.
That's the name of my boyfriend.
I just like to say that's very funny.
Joe was a guy's guy and I was never much of a guy's guy.
Like I always went for the creative and intellectual pursuits.
(12:34):
And so I've always kind of gravitated towards women for friendship.
But Joe saw me in the parking lot and he was like, hey, man, are you good?
I was like, you know, like.
And I just I I just crumbled and he stood there and he held me for like a good two,
(12:56):
three minutes while I just broke like I could not.
I can't.
I there's no it's not OK.
It's never going to be OK again.
There's something when faced with raw emotion that people respond to inherently subconsciously.
(13:18):
It's it's not it's not a pity.
They genuinely feel bad that this happened to you.
It's nothing saying that you are less because of it.
It's saying that they feel more for you because this happened.
And they're probably going to want to help in some way because that's the other great
(13:42):
part of us.
We like to share that which is good and we like to pick up that which is broken.
That's the longest it doesn't cost us too much.
That's the cost that most people come to weigh or even to set their automations on because
there's people out there.
(14:03):
They're they're like, no, not helping him.
I've already been through this thought process.
Not going to help.
There's somebody that once said that 10 percent of the world is going to inherently do the
selfish thing.
And 10 percent of the world is going to do the generous thing.
And then the rest, the 80 percent be swayed either way.
(14:28):
So yeah, you're going to have some shitheads.
You're going to have 30 did have come.
But you're also going to have some real genuine people.
And if you're walking in there expecting just one group, then you might end up pushing away
one of the good groups, the people that are genuinely like, I'm so sorry.
(14:53):
You know, it's not pity, it's empathy.
Yeah.
Thank you.
I'm just trying to pass on good knowledge because I found something that's good and
I want to share it.
You did great.
Yes.
I could see you on the big screen on TV.
OK, if I get your names like just first names, we're both Rena.
(15:17):
Yeah, we have the same name.
That's amazing.
That's amazing.
Oh my God.
I love it.
Oh, I'm so happy.
Finish the heart.
Finish the heart.
Oh, and just bring that.
Thank you.
We love you.
We love you, mystery advice man.
True pleasure, ladies.
Have a good one.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
(15:38):
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Have a great rest of your night.
You too.
Or day, yeah.
That's the plan.
That's the plan.
(20:17):
OK.
Let's go.
Yeah.
OK.
Let's go.
OK.
Let's go.
you
(20:54):
you
(21:24):
you
(21:54):
you
(22:24):
you
(22:54):
you
(23:24):
you
(23:54):
you
(24:24):
you
say it with your chest
Hey guys, it's WSWalker with the Laughing Matters Podcast, and welcome back everybody.
(00:11):
We have an interesting one on the board today.
Now as you guys have probably noticed at this point, I love to give advice, and I'm pretty
good at it.
And in the last couple episodes, I've been giving advice to people who haven't asked
for it.
Like in my nose and all sorts of places.
And most likely, the people that ask the questions that I'm giving advice on, they're never going
(00:35):
to hear the advice on it.
And I thought to myself, you know, this is not ideal, because A, while you guys are benefiting
from the advice, the people that are actually asking for the advice aren't really benefiting
from it.
It's very unlikely they're hearing this right now.
But on top of all that, I don't get to really ask any questions or get any further clarification.
(00:58):
What do you mean by this thing?
Or how long have you two been seeing each other?
Or what was it like growing up with your father alone?
Or, you know, stuff that will help me kind of navigate to the best advice that I can
give, and the advice that would most help the person in the situation.
Because as smart as we are, we ourselves tend to be our blind spot.
(01:22):
And while we may want to think one thing about ourselves, there might be some entirely different
truth to the matter.
And so I thought to myself, I gotta figure out a way so that I'm actually giving advice
to people.
And I seriously almost went to the college down the road and set up a card table with
two mics and just, you know, a sign that said free advice.
(01:47):
And then it hit me.
There is a way to do this.
And in a place that I've already got everything set up to record audio, where I'm not going
to have to edit out the sounds of an entire college behind me, and where there exists
an almost infinite flow of new people to talk to.
(02:10):
And it's at this point that we introduce Omegle into the formula.
A place where at the click of a button, I can be connected to any person.
That's connected on that website.
Now at this point in the recording, I have done a couple of recordings on Omegle and
they've, they've gone pretty well.
You know, there's been some bombing.
(02:32):
Not everybody on Omegle is there for help and not everybody on Omegle wants to be helped.
What's funny is the the biggest troll that I tend to get is somebody that's just basically
ignoring me or they're just playing their music loud and not acting at all affected
by my presence.
Which you know, of course hurts in its own right to have somebody just completely ignore
(02:57):
you.
We've all been there, I'm sure.
But there were several people that seemed to genuinely need some advice.
And so I was able to do that and I was able to do it for the show.
I get everybody that's on here.
I got their permission and I gotta tell you, I absolutely adore this.
(03:18):
So I'll probably be doing more of these.
So without any further ado, I introduce to you Will Helps Omegle.
Connecting in 3, 2, 1, contact.
No, please.
(03:40):
No, no, absolutely not.
Get off my screen.
Oh, sorry.
I thought she was saying no to me.
I was like, I reject you first.
I can promise you, I will give you some of the best advice you've ever had in your life.
Anything for free.
There's one stipulation.
It has to be about something you genuinely, genuinely care about.
(04:05):
Okay, I'm going first.
I have an issue.
How are you with relationship advice?
Perfect.
Okay.
I'm back with my ex and it's like, it was going okay, but things are starting to get
rocky again.
Should I abandon ship or should I stick to it?
(04:27):
Well, I need some more details here.
What was it that broke up the relationship the first time?
I had to break up with him because he was too immature and couldn't express enough affection
towards me.
He never cheated.
He, I don't know, he came back and he was sweet.
He was nice.
I know it sounds bad to say he changed, but he did.
(04:49):
For a while.
It is slipping back into the habit of being not outwardly affectionate.
Okay, so quick fix.
Okay, I would recommend the arm squeeze.
This woman that posted this advice on some channel and it became a really well-known
(05:10):
advice.
You guys were the products of our upbringing.
You know how they do.
It's not manly to share, to fix things that are emotional, only things that are physical.
This therapist, I think I want to say gave him the advice of let him know.
(05:32):
How long were you guys together?
We dated for like six months, then we were broken up for like five months.
So the I love yous have come down.
Yeah.
And you guys genuinely love each other.
Yeah.
Okay.
Let him know that he can squeeze your arm three times or even like leg, whatever, but
(05:53):
just three squeezes in a row.
I love you.
He doesn't have to say it.
Nobody knows what that three squeezes meant, but you guys.
It's a special thing.
And so he's now allowed to say that without that toxic background playing into it at all.
(06:16):
This is a new version of I love you.
He does have a very toxic family.
They're scared.
Oh my goodness.
Think about what would happen to him growing up in that family if he was open with his
emotions and he kind of get a better sense of why he's not.
So find ways around it.
(06:38):
Human beings, human beings are fantastic at figuring out ways to express things.
We find something good.
Our first instinct is to share it.
You know, you find a good meme, you send it to somebody you care about.
And we created a language out of the sounds that we could make with our mouths and the
air in our lungs.
And then we figured out how to make that last after somebody was gone and not saying those
(07:03):
things by creating written language.
And we just kept going and figuring out new ways to push our thoughts at people.
It did well until it hit the abstracts like emotions, emotions are.
But normally there aren't good words for it.
You know, there's some poets that have figured out some really clever ways of saying things
that really hit home.
(07:26):
But we had to turn to more abstracts like art, music, photography, dance.
Give him an interpretive dance to express my emotions.
It's not you're not too far off the mark because when it comes to when it comes to great sex,
like not good sex, what the absolute pinnacle of sex is, is when you are expressing to your
(07:51):
partner something that you cannot find the words for.
That is when sex gets that like.
Those are the people that are just broken after a breakup.
But like that, that can be another place that he can express those affections.
(08:13):
If you can kind of help him understand that like this is this is an option to like you
can sit.
I just pictured Kevin Hart going, say what's your chest?
You can put it out there to him that so long as you're constantly encouraging these new
(08:36):
avenues of expression.
I think this might be good.
Find ways to communicate his feelings that aren't the ways that are the traditional.
Traditional is the ones that got the roadblocks in his emotion.
I like that.
Thank you very much.
It's your turn.
My question might be a little bit.
(08:59):
OK, get ready.
OK, OK.
So.
So my father recently passed away and I had to come home from my school.
I'm studying abroad and I had to come home early and now I'm going back in a week and
(09:22):
a half and like I have to deal with like all these like people in my school.
You know, like they're like new, newly 18 and stuff and like they haven't really dealt
with like these big issues and stuff.
I mean, like they're going to like treat me like they're little like a person.
They're going to be like, I'm so sorry.
Yeah.
(09:42):
So like how I did this at this age, I lost my dad at 16 and he was he was like my he
was he was just this incredible person.
So like I was I was very, very hurt.
Sorry.
I do.
Do you want to keep going or do you want me to start into advice and you can kind of guide
(10:02):
me through the advice?
OK.
Did you ever read Lemony Snicket's series of unfortunate events?
That's like such a good book series.
Very big one on that because he nailed nailed it just better than anybody who has ever written
it that I've seen.
He nailed what it feels like to lose somebody that big in your life.
(10:25):
And suddenly, was it suddenly?
Well, yes.
OK.
The third mention suddenly got no, no, no, not the kids hers.
Yeah.
Oh, no, he it was for like a few years and then like, but we thought he was going to
get better and he did.
OK.
(10:46):
And then suddenly kind of turned for the worse.
Yeah, it all just and I wasn't even home.
I was on the plane and I heard.
Lemony Snicket said that when you lose some money, very important to you out of the blue,
but you're not expecting it.
It's like climbing stairs in the dark and stepping through that last one you thought
(11:07):
was there.
Only stretched over months and you just you feel flipped upside down.
You feel like just the whole world turned on you and it's completely different, but
it's the same.
But it's not ever going to be the OK same.
(11:29):
You know, it's going to be a different kind of same.
That's just not as OK.
He didn't say all of that.
I'm not throwing that.
But I went to school the day going back, I think after four or five days.
(11:49):
And the first person I saw was the person I was most worried about.
I was I was at that point working in a recording studio at the school, like after school hours,
just learning recording studio stuff.
And there was a I was the roadie for one of the high school bands.
(12:13):
And the main lead singer was Joe, this gigantic football player, captain of the football team.
That's the name of my boyfriend.
I just like to say that's very funny.
Joe was a guy's guy and I was never much of a guy's guy.
Like I always went for the creative and intellectual pursuits.
(12:34):
And so I've always kind of gravitated towards women for friendship.
But Joe saw me in the parking lot and he was like, hey, man, are you good?
I was like, you know, like.
And I just I I just crumbled and he stood there and he held me for like a good two,
(12:56):
three minutes while I just broke like I could not.
I can't.
I there's no it's not OK.
It's never going to be OK again.
There's something when faced with raw emotion that people respond to inherently subconsciously.
(13:18):
It's it's not it's not a pity.
They genuinely feel bad that this happened to you.
It's nothing saying that you are less because of it.
It's saying that they feel more for you because this happened.
And they're probably going to want to help in some way because that's the other great
(13:42):
part of us.
We like to share that which is good and we like to pick up that which is broken.
That's the longest it doesn't cost us too much.
That's the cost that most people come to weigh or even to set their automations on because
there's people out there.
(14:03):
They're they're like, no, not helping him.
I've already been through this thought process.
Not going to help.
There's somebody that once said that 10 percent of the world is going to inherently do the
selfish thing.
And 10 percent of the world is going to do the generous thing.
And then the rest, the 80 percent be swayed either way.
(14:28):
So yeah, you're going to have some shitheads.
You're going to have 30 did have come.
But you're also going to have some real genuine people.
And if you're walking in there expecting just one group, then you might end up pushing away
one of the good groups, the people that are genuinely like, I'm so sorry.
(14:53):
You know, it's not pity, it's empathy.
Yeah.
Thank you.
I'm just trying to pass on good knowledge because I found something that's good and
I want to share it.
You did great.
Yes.
I could see you on the big screen on TV.
OK, if I get your names like just first names, we're both Rena.
(15:17):
Yeah, we have the same name.
That's amazing.
That's amazing.
Oh my God.
I love it.
Oh, I'm so happy.
Finish the heart.
Finish the heart.
Oh, and just bring that.
Thank you.
We love you.
We love you, mystery advice man.
True pleasure, ladies.
Have a good one.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
(15:38):
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Have a great rest of your night.
You too.
Or day, yeah.
That's the plan.
That's the plan.
(20:17):
OK.
Let's go.
Yeah.
OK.
Let's go.
OK.
Let's go.
you
(20:54):
you
(21:24):
you
(21:54):
you
(22:24):
you
(22:54):
you
(23:24):
you
(23:54):
you
(24:24):
you
say it with your chest
Popular Podcasts
Are You A Charlotte?
In 1997, actress Kristin Davis’ life was forever changed when she took on the role of Charlotte York in Sex and the City. As we watched Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte navigate relationships in NYC, the show helped push once unacceptable conversation topics out of the shadows and altered the narrative around women and sex. We all saw ourselves in them as they searched for fulfillment in life, sex and friendships. Now, Kristin Davis wants to connect with you, the fans, and share untold stories and all the behind the scenes. Together, with Kristin and special guests, what will begin with Sex and the City will evolve into talks about themes that are still so relevant today. "Are you a Charlotte?" is much more than just rewatching this beloved show, it brings the past and the present together as we talk with heart, humor and of course some optimism.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com