March 31, 2025 • 36 mins
The Life Shift Rewind
I’m excited to share bonus episodes from Patreon, where I revisited past guests to discuss what has changed and the value of sharing their stories. Since I currently only have the lower tiers available, I wanted to make these conversations accessible to the public feed. If you'd like to support the show directly, please consider joining the $3 or $5 tier on Patreon – www.patreon.com/thelifeshiftpodcast.
Shanna Benson is back on The Life Shift for a special bonus episode that explores the transformative power of sharing our stories.
We chat about how Shanna took a leap of faith after a tough breakup, using pivotal moments to reclaim her identity and chase her dreams in baking. It's a raw and honest conversation where we unpack the importance of letting go of fear and embracing our truth, even when it feels daunting. Shanna shares her journey from feeling trapped to finding freedom through self-expression and the lessons learned along the way. If you’re looking for inspiration to break free from your own constraints, this episode is definitely a must-listen.
Listen to Shanna's full episode on The Life Shift: https://www.thelifeshiftpodcast.com/shanna-benson/
This podcast uses the following third-party services for analysis:
Podcorn - https://podcorn.com/privacy
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Hello, my friends. I justwanted to drop some special bonus
episodes into the feed thatyou probably have not heard unless
you are a part or an earlypart of the Patreon for the Life
Shift Podcast. If you don'tknow, I do have a Patreon. It currently
only has two tiers. One is athree dollar a month tier just to
(00:21):
support what I'm doing, helpscover production costs. And then
there's a five dollar tierwhich will get you episodes early
and just the, I guess, warmfuzzies for help out with the Life
Shift Podcast. But I used tohave other tiers where people were
so generous and were offeringadditional money each month to get
(00:41):
bonus episodes and possiblewinnings of T shirts and all sorts
of things. And then I realizeda couple months ago that I wasn't
able to deliver what I wantedto, especially for those of you that
were giving me the extramoney. So right now we're just kind
of doing the early episodes.You'll always get those. So if you
want to support the Life Shiftpodcast, please jump over to patreon.com
(01:02):
forward/thelifeshiftpodpodcast and you can find that information
there. But I come on herebecause I want to share a series
of these bonus episodes that Idid early on in the Patreon journey.
There are like 20 plusepisodes in which I had bonus recordings
with previous guests. So Iwould go back and we would have a
(01:23):
conversation about theexperience of sharing their story
on the Life Shift podcast.Catch up on anything. And I think
these are super important andI know most of them did not see the
light of day from outside ofthe Patreon. So I'm going to be dropping
these episodes. Whateveryou're listening to now is another
episode. So I'm going to usethe same intro for all of them. But
(01:45):
here is one of the bonusepisodes with a former guest from
the Life Shift podcast. And ifyou like this, let me know because
I'm thinking of bringing someof this back and talking to previous
guests as I go into year four.So enjoy this bonus episode that
was once released on thePatreon feed. I'm Matt Gilhooley
(02:07):
and this is the Life ShiftCandid conversations about the pivotal
moments that have changedlives forever. And this is a special
one with my friend Shauna. Hello.
Hi, Matt. So good to see your face.
(02:29):
It's nice to see you. AndShauna, you were the first person
that I ever recorded the LifeShift podcast with. And when it was
still a class assignment, Ididn't know this was Going to be
a thing. And so thank you fortrusting me with that. I know it
was kind of hidden behind the,the firewall at first because we
(02:51):
knew it was just going to bean assignment. And then here we are,
122 episodes into thisjourney. So thank you for that.
Thank you for thinking of meas somebody who would, you know,
get you a good grade. Wouldn'tsay so many ums that you would have
to, but you did. But I did.But yeah, just for even trusting
(03:11):
me for something. I mean, thatwas a big deal back then. You were
just really learning andgetting everything together. So I
feel like it was a big one.
It was a long time ago. Werecorded that episode on February
11, 2022, which.
Oh, wow.
You know, we're in 2024 rightnow, and it just blows my mind. I
(03:33):
listened to it again thismorning because I was like, I don't
like to listen to those earlyones because they're early ones.
And I think you can probablyremember baking your first cake and
what it might have tasted like.
I know, but, you know what'sso funny is I think that it's important
to go back and look at that,right? Like, I love watching, like,
(03:55):
the TikTok trends where it waslike, post your first cake you ever
made and then what you're atnow. And I don't think you realize
over time, like, how muchyou've improved. So I think it's
great to go back and like,listen to those and be like, man,
you know, I, I think it's agood reminder of where you're at
now.
You know, it was, it was quitea journey listening to that. And,
(04:18):
you know, I think your storyso resonates. I was like, I should
have done things differently,but I didn't know, like you said.
And so you were one of the twoepisodes that came out on day one,
which was March 22, 2022. Andthat was like the testing ground.
And since then, I've, I'vedone a lot and I've, I've referenced
(04:40):
your story story many timesand I kind of minimize it without.
I don't try to minimize it inan insulting way, but I also bring
it back to how significant andhow specific your life shift moment
was in the story and whatstood out to me. And it was so much
of you going to the mailboxthat day and like literally getting
(05:02):
a piece of mail. And so Ireferenced that a lot because sometimes
people have this, like, theyhave a hard time trying to find that
one moment. But yours Wasjust, like, so visual for me that
I always go back to it. Somaybe you can tell us a little bit
about what your story was about.
Yeah. So, you know, it goesback to that moment where, you know,
(05:24):
my life really shifted intothe next phase. And I was in the
middle of, you know, trying togo through a divorce, breaking up
with someone I had been withfor 14 years. And, you know, I knew
that he was cheating. I knewsomething was going, and I just couldn't
find it. I just couldn'tpinpoint it. Finally did, and then,
(05:44):
you know, was like, oh, I wantto work on it. And, you know, all
of these things. And allalong, for all of this time, I had.
I had had these hopes and Ihad had these dreams that we were.
I was going to have thisbakery one day, and I was, you know,
I was going to do it. Andjust, you know, the goal was always
his career, and it was always,you know, him putting himself first.
(06:05):
And I guess that's probablywhy we didn't work out to begin with,
looking back. But it was just,you know, that moment where I was
looking for a sign, and Ihappened to just go to the mailbox.
And when I went to themailbox, there was a letter in it
that he had started his owncompany that I didn't know about,
and a credit card for thatcompany. And it was the realization
(06:28):
that I was still. Even after Ihad, you know, caught him cheating,
and even after all of thethings, I was still putting him before
me. And it was in that momentthat I was like, girl, what are you
doing? Like, move on and doyour thing. And I decided at that
moment that was going to beit. And I called my divorce attorney
(06:48):
and I filed the paperwork, andI listed the house for sale, and
I quit my job.
And you went to Mexico.
And I went to Mexico and I.All of those things. And those were
like, two out of the three ofthose might have been a mistake,
but it was, you know, it waseverything that I had to do to move
(07:09):
forward. And I only say amistake because I quit my job not
thinking through the fact thatI would need verified income to get
a house, you know, like, sothose types of things. But everything
really played out. And, youknow, I'm so grateful for that moment.
And I've. I think I feel likein my healing journey after that,
(07:29):
I've had so many life shifts.Even last year, even. I'm in, like,
a completely different placetoday than I was even when we recorded
this. Like, it's a crazy lifeis crazy.
Life is crazy. And I've heardso many stories from so many people
and I think, wow, like, how dopeople navigate this? It's obvious
(07:52):
that, like, most peopleprobably have multiple life shifts.
It's not like one and done. Imean, if, I guess maybe if you're
lucky one and done, but maybenot because you want to continue
growing. And it's fascinating.Although so many people have these
varied experiences from likesuper traumatic to something maybe
more internal fire lit andmoving forward, so many of our emotions
(08:15):
and our reactions to those arevery similar. And I've kind of noticed
that across the board from,you know, from the time we recorded,
I didn't have a lot. I didn'thave a big sample size. I just had
you. And so it's sointeresting to see though, even though
your story is different from alot of people, there's a lot of the
same feelings and the thingsthat you went through. So what I've
learned over these hundredplus episodes is how alike we are.
(08:39):
Despite all the things and allthe things the world tells us that
makes us different. I thinkwe're all just trying to do the same
thing. And it's just like,enjoy the time that we have and do
it in a purposeful way.
I agree. I mean, I. I thinkthat that's the big thing. Like,
it doesn't. We're all ondifferent journeys, right? But. And
(09:02):
they're all those journeys aretaking different paths and all of
those journeys, you know, butat the end of the day, like, we're
all just trying to get tocontinue on that journey, right?
Like, wake up every day andlike, the core of everything is the
same. And I think that theinteresting thing that you bring
to light is, you know, there'sa lot of different patterns of life
(09:24):
shift, right? Like, there are,like myself that, you know, is kind
of like the divorce is whatstarted it. But then at Life shift
was really like, who I startedto become afterwards and starting
my business and doing this andall of those things. And you've had
a couple other people thathave, like, similar, you know, similar
things. But then there'speople who have had real, like, emotional
trauma or deaths or births or,you know, like so many different
(09:49):
things. And all of those havejust taken people on a different
path. And it's how you reactto that that is really your journey.
It's. It's not the instancethat happens. It's that reaction.
And I think that that'simportant to, to take away.
Oh, for sure. And I've. I'vehad some guests on the show, and
I won't say who, but there aresome that you can tell that have
(10:12):
not reflected on the moment orhow it's affected them. And you can
tell how some people thathave. Are quite different. They're
farther down the road. Theyreally understand the value of it.
Like you even pointed out, youknow, like, I'm thankful that all
that crap happened because itled me to who I am today. I'm the
same. You know, I'm notthankful that my mom died, but I'm.
(10:34):
I'm thankful that I've learnedfrom that experience to bring myself
to this point, because for solong, I hadn't learned from it. And
I lived my life in this spaceof not being able to reflect on it,
not being able to learn fromit, not being able to move forward.
And now that I have, it'slike, oh, this is much more valuable
experience.
Well, and. Yeah, and that'sthe. I think, like, I don't think
(10:58):
I was in that place for a longtime, right? Not thankful for it,
not whatever it is. Like, youdon't have to be thankful per se.
Like, you know, but I keptstumbling down the bricks of that
journey, and I, you know, I. Iliterally just told a friend this
the other day, like, if you'renot going to heal from that, from
(11:20):
that instance, or if you'renot going to heal from your trauma,
you're going to just continueto stumble or you're going to escape
from it. But when you're doneescaping, it's just waiting in the.
It's just waiting in the wingsfor you, right? And you're going
to deal with it and it's goingto be worse. So it's just a matter
of, like, getting to thatpoint. And when I finally accepted,
(11:43):
you know, everything that hadhappened and, you know, just looked
back and was like, you know,not only did I accept everything
that happened in that. In, youknow, in that immediate. I looked
back and I was like, man, youknow, whoever you want to believe
in was sending me signs foryears and, you know, was. And there
(12:04):
was a lot of reasons that Ishouldn't have been with that person
to begin with. And over theyears, I had seen so many different
signs, and I was. When Ilooked back, I was like, man, it
took an absolute rapture topull me away from this person. And
it, you know, I was like, man,I. So I had to heal back from, like,
all of those things. And Covidwas the best thing that ever happened
(12:25):
to me. Like, I feel badBecause I know it wasn't the best
thing for a lot of people, butif it hadn't been for those three
months, quarantining alone bymyself and really like, well, the
only friend you have is yourself.
And TikTok.
And TikTok, exactly. Justthose things. Like, if I hadn't done
that, like, I don't know whereI would be necessarily today. So
(12:49):
I am super thankful for those moments.
You know, I don't know if youshared your story publicly with a
lot of people before this. Didyou hear from anyone, like, that
may have listened to yourepisode or someone in your circle
that you might have sharedthat they. They said any. Any feedback
to you about your episode? Iknow it was a while ago, so I'm wondering
if. If you remember any.
(13:10):
Yes. So I had. Actually, it'sa really funny. I don't know. And
it's funny that you asked thatbecause I actually was dwelling on
that this morning. I nevertold most people anything that happened
between us when we wentthrough the divorce. I got essentially
threatened to keep my mouthclosed and that nobody wanted to
(13:34):
hear my side of the story and,you know, just basically to keep
my mouth closed. And I did outof fear. I didn't talk about it.
People knew I got divorced,obviously, and they knew that he
had cheated and, you know,whatever. They kind of knew the outcome,
but they didn't know a lot ofthe other stuff. They didn't know
how I started my business. AndI think the most interesting thing
(13:56):
was that I got, like, messagesand phone calls from people that
I didn't even know paidattention to my social media. Like.
Like people that I know inpassing or people that, like, I had
worked with back in the day orwhatever, and they were like, I knew
(14:16):
you went through something. Ijust didn't know what it was or it
was just so funny how. I mean,people that I would. I'm like, I
didn't even know we wereconnected on social media that you
saw that and they had listenedto it. And I thought that was so,
like, eye opening. I was like,man. Because again, rem. Like, this
is also your. The first. Thesecond one that you put out, you
(14:38):
released, you know, And I'mlike, the fact that, like, all of
these people were listening toa class project essentially was crazy
to me. And yeah, it was just.And it was. It was, I guess, maybe
like, freeing that, like, Iactually got to like, say that story.
So, yeah, it was reallyinteresting. That's funny that I
actually. I saw somebody'spost about something like that and
(15:02):
I group, I'm in. And Ithought, man, if I could go back
in time, I would have blastedmy story.
Yeah, it's interesting thepower that storytelling has for us,
for those of us that have thestory, that keep the story. Yeah,
I think there's a lot ofpeople that don't share their story
out of, in your case, fear. Mycase, like, maybe a shame that, you
(15:24):
know, I'm a guy shouldn't besad. I shouldn't, you know, share
this, these vulnerable partsbecause society says X, Y and Z.
But once we do share them,there's so much. It's like a. Like
you said, it's freeing in away. It's like it's out there. It's
not, you know, it's not asdrastic as it sounded in my head.
For a lot of us, like, thingskind of build themselves up and then
(15:46):
you say it out loud and you'relike, oh, that's palatable. I can
move forward with that. So Ican, I can relate with that.
And I think sometimes when wespeak, right. Like when, when we
speak it, maybe we don't hearit per se. And especially with something
like this where you can goback. Like when I went back and listened
to was like an out of bodyexperience because it was like two
(16:09):
months later, right. Or amonth later or whatever that it,
you know, and I was on a walkand I was listening to it and I was
like, who is that girl? Like,she's pretty cool. Because you do,
like, you hear it. It's adifferent. Like I don't hear my voice
every day. Right. Like inthat, in that way. And so it was,
it was a really interestingway of like hearing it back and being
(16:30):
like, no, I did a good job.Like, I.
Do you feel validated in yourexperience? Like, when you hear yourself
tell your story, do you feellike, yeah, I did that, I did that
and I did it well and I'mworking through whatever the next
shift in my life might be. Doyou, do you have confidence in that?
Yeah, a lot. Like, because,you know, I really think that, at
(16:53):
least for myself, I can'tspeak for anybody else at this point
in life. I feel like everyyear I have a shift. Right. Like,
I have just. I'm a bigbeliever in if there's an opportunity
in front of you, take it. Evenif that opportunity in, like my current
situation was to relax alittle. And so like life just constantly
(17:16):
is, you know, bobbing andweaving and so being able to, to
go back and listen tosomething that was two years ago.
But talking about somethingthat had happened, it's now almost
seven years later, you know,and, you know, we, when we talk about
things that are life shiftsand like, that incident was very
(17:36):
like, cut and dried to thatmoment. But I think so often it's
like, you know, I would say topeople who are feeling down, like,
you know, are kind of goingthrough the same thing. Like, you're,
you're, you're looking for themass. Like you're looking for Cirque
du Soleil to come out of theceiling, right? And if you really
just looked at the littlemoments, like, that was how I got
(17:59):
through a lot of whatever Istopped looking at. I stopped waiting
for something major to happen.And I was like, okay, well, I got
a front row parking spot atPublix in the middle of the rain,
right? And that's a big win.
Like, perspective shift.
Yeah. Like, so it's likesometimes it's the little things
that happen, right? And if youstart to look at all of those little
(18:22):
things, they do add up tosomething that's big and you're shifting,
like, you know, over time, Ithink in perspective and in all of
those things. So being able togo back and listen to kind of like
that first cake, you know,it's like that first cake that you
make and now where you aretoday, it's like that. Where was
I at two years ago? And here'sa life check in now. Completely different
(18:43):
goals and everything.
I mean, at that point, we weretalking about this Bake off, this
like, Halloween Food NetworkBake off thing that you were a part
of that hadn't even come outyet. So maybe you can catch us up.
Like, what's happened since.
Yeah, so I did Holiday wars onFood Network Season 4.
(19:03):
I think it was episode. Itwasn't Halloween. You're right. Sorry.
It's the same.
I watched same thing.
But yeah, one's Christmas,one's Halloween. So I did that. And
it was probably one of thebest experiences of my life. I just
thought that it was amazinghad gone. And, you know, prior to
doing that, like, my wholeentire goal was, you know, I'm gonna
(19:26):
open this bakery and I'mgonna, you know, I had put at this
point, point pen to paper somany times right to where I found
a space, kind of marked itout, had, you know, an idea, started
putting together that budget,trying to figure out, you know, what
I was going to do. I, youknow, went into a commercial kitchen
(19:46):
and then I went into, youknow, trying to lease A couple different
spaces. And every time I gotto where I was literally right, writing
my about to sign my name,something came up and I was like,
I can't do this. Like, Ican't, I can't, I can't do it. And
I think that over and over andover I kept getting this. Like I,
(20:07):
I was doing too much, right?Like I had a full time job and I
was trying to do, I did thisshow and I was doing these events
and I was producing events andit was just like all of these things
and I kept saying to myself,like, I have to do this. The next
step is this. You know, it'slike people that are in a relationship
and they're like, well, I'mgoing to get married because it's
the next, the next step isthat I have to get married, right?
(20:28):
That's what, like that's theprogression. And so I kept trying
to do that and then somethingthat happened and I'm like, no, I
can't do it. I can't, I'm sosorry. Release the space. I can't
do it. Whatever. And I did theshow and then I realized, like, none
of these people have stores.Like none of these people on these
shows actually have a brickand mortar location. Like I can do
(20:53):
this and not have the brickand mortar, right? Like I can be
on shows and I could be afeatured, you know, baker, chef,
whatever you want to call itat food and wine events throughout
the U.S. like, I could dowhatever. And I just shifted my goals
and I was like, you know, why,why do I have to do this? And then
I decided that I was going tokind of go this other route. I had
(21:16):
an opportunity with a cateringcompany that's a very large catering
company. And I started doingthat and I got the licensing and
I was baking and I ended upworking almost two full time jobs.
Well, really two full timejobs. I was working during the day
that I would come home, startbaking at 5 o'clock, and deliver
their desserts to them at 2o'clock in the morning, grab McDonald's
(21:37):
on the way home, and then comehome, go to bed. And that was my
routine. Four to five nights aweek. I gained a lot of weight and
my thyroid went crazy. Andjust the stress I was putting on
my body just wasn't good. AndI learned in that, I learned from
that two really importantthings. One, I cannot do it all,
(22:00):
and I shouldn't do it all. Andtwo, to never let somebody else drive
your business because I madesome mistakes in letting this catering
company guide my business andhad one big client that was paying.
They were a very big client.But then when they weren't there
(22:21):
anymore, neither was mybusiness. And it was great to learn
it at such like a small scaleversus having really like built a
business and then, you know,lost, you know, lost it at that point.
So I just shifted a lot inwhat I decided to do and I no longer
am planning on opening a spaceanytime soon. I don't know if I ever
(22:44):
will. I went through thecasting process again last, last
year and I can't say for wherebecause I'm under NDA again, but
made it all the way to the endand I was supposed to be leaving
to go film and the day beforeI was leaving, got told I wasn't
going, they had passed, andthen decided to go with somebody
(23:07):
else. And that was another bigblow. And again another one of those
things where it's like, okay,I just learned that lesson twice
because I didn't learn itright the first time. Right. Never
to put all your eggs in onebasket. And I did that again. And
I think we just keep learningthe same lesson until. Till it's
beat into our souls. And sothis year I have some new goals and
(23:30):
working on doing that castingone more time, trying to make it
for this year. It's been aninteresting ride this last year.
Yeah. But I think you're at aspace now. It seems that when these
things are happening, you'vehad enough time to reflect on, you
know, the value of, you know,of course they suck in the moment
(23:51):
and they suck the couple weeksafter. But then when you reemerge,
you make new goals, you makenew plans. It sounds like there's
this, this evolution of sortsin which you're like, okay, yeah,
that didn't serve me. And nowI know that I wasn't chasing that
for the right reason. Right,yeah, that's what I'm assuming.
Well, like I am just so Ialways say, like I'm task oriented.
(24:16):
Right. I need to have a to dolist of things and I need to have
like, you know, daily, weekly,monthly, quarterly, yearly, whatever
it is. Like I kind of need tohave a direction. If I don't have
a direction of where I'mgoing, I will lay down and watch
Netflix all day.
(24:36):
Which sometimes is okay.
Which sometimes is okay. Butthat's like it if you have. If I
have no goal or no end path.Right. And it's. It was like after
somebody told said to me,after I did that show, I said, okay,
well, I hit the goal. I madeit onto a show, and that was, you
know, that was the big goal.Right? Now I want to host one or
(24:57):
be a judge. And I think itwas. My mom was like, you should
slow down. Like, you were onone show and you lost. Like, maybe
you should just set a goal tobe on a show again. And I was like,
no, I don't work that waybecause the goals are big. If you
make baby goals, like, peoplewill say, like, oh, you make baby
goals to step up to it. I'mlike, no, I make big goals because
(25:21):
everything that's that babygoal will get you to that goal regardless.
So, yeah, I made it onto ashow. Well, now I want to judge or
now I want to host one. Sowhat do I have to do? I have to be
on other shows and I have tocontinue cooking and creating content.
All of that leads up to thatbig goal. But if I'm only working
towards the baby ones, then I'll.
But there's more checklists,right? But that's more checks on
(25:43):
your list. So maybe you shouldhave 25 baby goals and then that
big goal at the end, thenyou'll be checking things off all
the time.
Well, I feel like I Like, youknow, when people talk about, like,
manifestation, right? Likemanifesting your goals. So once I
hit it, then that becomes myreality. So now I know I can be on
the show proven, tried andtrue. So that's no longer the goal.
(26:08):
That's a task.
Okay.
Like, so now I've created thebig goal that's up here and now doing
one to two other shows andthen creating some content. Like,
all of these things fall intotask as tasks. So I already, like,
in con, like, I already know Ican do that. So now it's the next.
And I sound. I don't know,sometimes I think it sounds egotistical,
(26:30):
but, like, I already did it. Icould do it again.
I don't think it is. I thinkfor some people like myself who've.
I've always had elements ofself doubt. Like, no matter if I
graduate with a 4.0 or, youknow, whatever it might be, there's
always that doubt. Like, oh,did I earn it? Did maybe just it
was easy, or, you know, like,whatever it might be. And so for
(26:51):
people that. That think, likeme, it might. It might sound like,
well, you did it once. Can youdo it again? Whereas you. I love
this mentality of, like, I didit once, I can clearly do it again.
Which is like, kind of whatI'm trying to work towards. In my.
My confidence and. And thenthose pieces. But I love it. So it
(27:13):
doesn't. I don't think itsounds egotistical. I think it sounds
admirable. I think it soundslike a place that I hope to get to.
And so I hope you get tojudging the show and doing. Or hosting
it and doing whatever you.Whatever's next. I think Jug. Judging
and then hosting. Is that howthat order goes?
Yeah, probably judging andthen hosting or one or the other
or however. I don't even knowhow it goes. I don't even know what
(27:35):
the progress would be. Butit's so funny. Like, like you said,
and I always tell you this,like, we talk about this, and I'm
like, you know, you have toget past your imposter syndrome.
Like, that is something that,like, you just have to look at, like,
the signs around you. Like,you know, in terms for you particularly,
like, you. You. You're. You'rewinning awards and people are noticing
(27:57):
you. And like, this. The LifeShift podcast has really kind of
become its own thing. And it'sreally, like, growing and it's, you
know, like, you sent me one ofthem and I'm like, dude, you're.
You. You're on a list of 10 or25 or whatever it was with, like,
who is celebrity DrewBarrymore or Reese Witherspoon?
Amy Poehler.
Amy Poehler, my favorite. AndI'm like, that's hu. Of everything
(28:20):
that she had to accomplish inher life to get on, even noticed
and put on that. And youstarted as a. As a class and have
taken it to this. So thinkabout that.
I regret how I responded tothat because at first I was just
like, oh, well, someone waslike, how do you feel about this?
And I was like, well, I feellike I'll just be overlooked because
look at all these famouspeople there. And then they were
(28:43):
like, no, Matt, look whoyou're on this list with. And I was
like, oh, you're right. Like,I feel really crappy for. My first
response was like, oh, I'mjust going to be overlooked. And
so you're right. I. I need to.I think a lot of people need to kind
of just adopt that of like,this confidence and imposter syndrome
is real and it's hard andit's. It exists, but there's a way
(29:05):
through. And you're kind ofproof of that. Like, I did it. I
can do it again. No big deal.Here we go. I'm going to accomplish
these tasks.
And we're. It's Just. It'sjust another side of the spectrum.
Right? Like, there's impostersyndrome on this side, and then there's
where I'm on the other side,where I'm. I'm always like, oh, I
could do that. And it doesn'tmatter what it is. Like, I'm like,
(29:28):
oh, well, if I had theeducation, I could be a doctor. You
know, like, it's justeducation that smart. And it's bad.
I don't know why I alwaysthink that.
But is it bad?
I don't know if it's bad. Imean, I guess because. And it's.
It's funny because I don'tthink it's. I guess where I, like,
(29:48):
play into it is I don't thinkof myself any better than anyone
else, and I don't think ofanyone else better than me. We're
all either at differentstations of life or different levels
of education. Right. Andthere's other things that play into
that, because there are peoplewho, you know, like, there are people
who just aren't as smart asother people or people who are more
street smart than otherpeople. You know, like, there's different
(30:08):
things, but in terms of justthe average person, we're all on
the same playing field. It'sjust a matter of who. Who learned
the books or, you know, whosaid yes. Right? Who said yes. Right.
Like, so I know better thananyone else, and no one else. And
no one else is better than me.I just feel like it's all down to
opportunity that comes up andwhether or not you take it or move
(30:30):
forward.
No, I love it. I love this.This version of you because even
listening to that episodetoday, you sound different. You sound
like you're in a differentconfidence space. I mean, it wasn't
like you didn't soundconfident then, but it almost sounds
like you're even more evolvedinto what you want to do and. And
the direction that you go. AndI could be completely delusional
(30:50):
right now and just making thatup, but really listening to that,
it. I feel like we've matured,you know, like, there's. There's
something in our lives as.Because you were just turning, like,
20 something in that episode.So you're like. Yeah, you're just.
You're just like mid-20s now.And, you know, we went to high school
together 25 years ago, butwe'll just pretend that that doesn't
(31:10):
exist.
I know. I don't know how wewere in High School 25 years ago,
and I'm only 32.
Yeah.
It's the math. Ain't nothing,but I'm with it.
Yeah. If. If someone wasthinking about, like, sharing their
story for the first time withsomeone, not necessarily on a podcast,
because that's a big asksometimes, but is there anything
that you would want to advisepeople if they were, you know, kind
(31:34):
of. They feel like they wantto share their story, but they're
kind of not sure just yet. Isthere any. Any advice after sharing
your story that maybe could behelpful to them?
Yeah, I mean, I think that forme, the. I would say that one of
my biggest regrets, like I hadsaid, was not telling my side of
(31:55):
the story and, you know,letting somebody else make me live
in fear over that side, overmy. My story. Right. And I do, to
some effect, think thatthere's, you know, depending on the.
Depending on the, you know,how deep that is, if it's trauma,
if it's, you know, whatever.Like, there are some. There are some
pieces where it's like,sometimes sharing your story does
(32:19):
really hurt somebody else.Right? But if you can put into words
what your side of that storyis that isn't maliciously intended
to hurt somebody else, but isreally, like, your truth, I think
that you should share it, iffor nothing else. Like, sometimes.
Sometimes I think that, like Ialways say, like, with keyboard warriors,
(32:41):
right, like, it's really easyto type something or it's really
easy, like, write it, becauseyou don't have to pay attention to
somebody else's eyeballs andwhat, you know, how they're reacting
to it and all of that. Butwhen you are telling somebody, whether
it's verbally, like one. Onone or on a phone or in a podcast
or, you know, any of that, Ithink you hear that side of the story
(33:01):
from the perspective, like,the sound makes you think about it,
and you're like, well, maybeI'm crazy. Or like, did that really
happen? Or was that timeline.Like, is the timeline in my. In my
head correct? Or. You know, Ithink you start to work through those
things, which is why even.Even telling your stories in therapy
(33:21):
makes such a big deal. It'swhy therapy, I think, works so well,
because it's not necessarilywhat the person is telling you or
the work they're telling youto do. It's. It's you solving your
own problems. I have literallysaid things out loud to a therapist
and been like, no, I'm good.I. I heard it. I heard it. We don't
(33:42):
even need to go deeper. Iheard it, you know, and I think that
that's so important to hearthose things. It does make a big
difference when you're justlike, thinking versus saying, I agree.
I've, I've had guests on theshow that they'll be telling their
story and they're like, Iliterally haven't thought about that.
That, like, just popped intomy brain. And so there's something
(34:03):
about the, the action of, ofsaying that, you know, while you
were saying that, like,sometimes it's easier to type it
out or it's easier to, like,write it out than it is to say it
out loud. You just think of,like, the first time you told someone
that you love them to theirface and how hard that the first
time saying those three wordswas. Yeah, I think for a lot of us,
we can relate to that. It'smuch easier to type it out or text
(34:24):
it or something along thoselines, saying those words. Right.
And so I think, you know,thank you for trusting me with your
story. So early on, before wereally knew anything was going to
happen at the end of thatepisode, I said, you know, this is
the first episode and maybethere'll be a couple more. And you're
like, there's going to be somany more. I'm like, yeah, right.
(34:46):
Well, you were right. So thankyou for trusting me and just believing
in this journey and forsharing this update with the Patreon
supporters. I reallyappreciate you.
Absolutely. Of course. Loveit. Glad to be here.
I didn't give you anopportunity to say your, your name
poem. So sometimes people callyou Shanna, sometimes people call
(35:07):
you Shauna.
So you tell them Charlottealso is.
Charlotte is a good one.
Yeah, always. Yeah. So my nameis Shauna Benson. It's. It's spelled
wrong, but it's like Russia,Shauna, without the rush. Except
for I'm always rushing, soit's fitting. Just call me Rosh Hashanah.
I love it. So if people wantto, like people listening right now,
if they want to connect withyou, is that something you'd welcome?
(35:30):
And if so, how can they get inyour world and see what you're doing?
Yeah, so they can always. Ilove sharing or talking to people
that, you know, connectingwith people in a multi. Multitude
of ways. They can always getme on Instagram at the Shawna Benson
or at no Regrets Dessert codeon Instagram. Those are the easiest
ways to get me.
(35:52):
Perfect. I'll put those in theshow notes. That way, if any of the
Patreon people are listeningand they want to do that, they can
just click on it and it'll beeasy for them. So thanks again and
for those of you listening,thank you for your support. It helps
me. I'm a one person team, soit helps me cover software costs
and hardware costs and all thethings that come along with being
(36:12):
an indie podcaster. So Iappreciate you. Thank you so much
for your support and I will beback next month with another bonus
episode for the Patreon feed.For more information, please visit
(36:34):
www.thelifeshiftpodcast.com.
Hello, my friends. I justwanted to drop some special bonus
episodes into the feed thatyou probably have not heard unless
you are a part or an earlypart of the Patreon for the Life
Shift Podcast. If you don'tknow, I do have a Patreon. It currently
only has two tiers. One is athree dollar a month tier just to
(00:21):
support what I'm doing, helpscover production costs. And then
there's a five dollar tierwhich will get you episodes early
and just the, I guess, warmfuzzies for help out with the Life
Shift Podcast. But I used tohave other tiers where people were
so generous and were offeringadditional money each month to get
(00:41):
bonus episodes and possiblewinnings of T shirts and all sorts
of things. And then I realizeda couple months ago that I wasn't
able to deliver what I wantedto, especially for those of you that
were giving me the extramoney. So right now we're just kind
of doing the early episodes.You'll always get those. So if you
want to support the Life Shiftpodcast, please jump over to patreon.com
(01:02):
forward/thelifeshiftpodpodcast and you can find that information
there. But I come on herebecause I want to share a series
of these bonus episodes that Idid early on in the Patreon journey.
There are like 20 plusepisodes in which I had bonus recordings
with previous guests. So Iwould go back and we would have a
(01:23):
conversation about theexperience of sharing their story
on the Life Shift podcast.Catch up on anything. And I think
these are super important andI know most of them did not see the
light of day from outside ofthe Patreon. So I'm going to be dropping
these episodes. Whateveryou're listening to now is another
episode. So I'm going to usethe same intro for all of them. But
(01:45):
here is one of the bonusepisodes with a former guest from
the Life Shift podcast. And ifyou like this, let me know because
I'm thinking of bringing someof this back and talking to previous
guests as I go into year four.So enjoy this bonus episode that
was once released on thePatreon feed. I'm Matt Gilhooley
(02:07):
and this is the Life ShiftCandid conversations about the pivotal
moments that have changedlives forever. And this is a special
one with my friend Shauna. Hello.
Hi, Matt. So good to see your face.
(02:29):
It's nice to see you. AndShauna, you were the first person
that I ever recorded the LifeShift podcast with. And when it was
still a class assignment, Ididn't know this was Going to be
a thing. And so thank you fortrusting me with that. I know it
was kind of hidden behind the,the firewall at first because we
(02:51):
knew it was just going to bean assignment. And then here we are,
122 episodes into thisjourney. So thank you for that.
Thank you for thinking of meas somebody who would, you know,
get you a good grade. Wouldn'tsay so many ums that you would have
to, but you did. But I did.But yeah, just for even trusting
(03:11):
me for something. I mean, thatwas a big deal back then. You were
just really learning andgetting everything together. So I
feel like it was a big one.
It was a long time ago. Werecorded that episode on February
11, 2022, which.
Oh, wow.
You know, we're in 2024 rightnow, and it just blows my mind. I
(03:33):
listened to it again thismorning because I was like, I don't
like to listen to those earlyones because they're early ones.
And I think you can probablyremember baking your first cake and
what it might have tasted like.
I know, but, you know what'sso funny is I think that it's important
to go back and look at that,right? Like, I love watching, like,
(03:55):
the TikTok trends where it waslike, post your first cake you ever
made and then what you're atnow. And I don't think you realize
over time, like, how muchyou've improved. So I think it's
great to go back and like,listen to those and be like, man,
you know, I, I think it's agood reminder of where you're at
now.
You know, it was, it was quitea journey listening to that. And,
(04:18):
you know, I think your storyso resonates. I was like, I should
have done things differently,but I didn't know, like you said.
And so you were one of the twoepisodes that came out on day one,
which was March 22, 2022. Andthat was like the testing ground.
And since then, I've, I'vedone a lot and I've, I've referenced
(04:40):
your story story many timesand I kind of minimize it without.
I don't try to minimize it inan insulting way, but I also bring
it back to how significant andhow specific your life shift moment
was in the story and whatstood out to me. And it was so much
of you going to the mailboxthat day and like literally getting
(05:02):
a piece of mail. And so Ireferenced that a lot because sometimes
people have this, like, theyhave a hard time trying to find that
one moment. But yours Wasjust, like, so visual for me that
I always go back to it. Somaybe you can tell us a little bit
about what your story was about.
Yeah. So, you know, it goesback to that moment where, you know,
(05:24):
my life really shifted intothe next phase. And I was in the
middle of, you know, trying togo through a divorce, breaking up
with someone I had been withfor 14 years. And, you know, I knew
that he was cheating. I knewsomething was going, and I just couldn't
find it. I just couldn'tpinpoint it. Finally did, and then,
(05:44):
you know, was like, oh, I wantto work on it. And, you know, all
of these things. And allalong, for all of this time, I had.
I had had these hopes and Ihad had these dreams that we were.
I was going to have thisbakery one day, and I was, you know,
I was going to do it. Andjust, you know, the goal was always
his career, and it was always,you know, him putting himself first.
(06:05):
And I guess that's probablywhy we didn't work out to begin with,
looking back. But it was just,you know, that moment where I was
looking for a sign, and Ihappened to just go to the mailbox.
And when I went to themailbox, there was a letter in it
that he had started his owncompany that I didn't know about,
and a credit card for thatcompany. And it was the realization
(06:28):
that I was still. Even after Ihad, you know, caught him cheating,
and even after all of thethings, I was still putting him before
me. And it was in that momentthat I was like, girl, what are you
doing? Like, move on and doyour thing. And I decided at that
moment that was going to beit. And I called my divorce attorney
(06:48):
and I filed the paperwork, andI listed the house for sale, and
I quit my job.
And you went to Mexico.
And I went to Mexico and I.All of those things. And those were
like, two out of the three ofthose might have been a mistake,
but it was, you know, it waseverything that I had to do to move
(07:09):
forward. And I only say amistake because I quit my job not
thinking through the fact thatI would need verified income to get
a house, you know, like, sothose types of things. But everything
really played out. And, youknow, I'm so grateful for that moment.
And I've. I think I feel likein my healing journey after that,
(07:29):
I've had so many life shifts.Even last year, even. I'm in, like,
a completely different placetoday than I was even when we recorded
this. Like, it's a crazy lifeis crazy.
Life is crazy. And I've heardso many stories from so many people
and I think, wow, like, how dopeople navigate this? It's obvious
(07:52):
that, like, most peopleprobably have multiple life shifts.
It's not like one and done. Imean, if, I guess maybe if you're
lucky one and done, but maybenot because you want to continue
growing. And it's fascinating.Although so many people have these
varied experiences from likesuper traumatic to something maybe
more internal fire lit andmoving forward, so many of our emotions
(08:15):
and our reactions to those arevery similar. And I've kind of noticed
that across the board from,you know, from the time we recorded,
I didn't have a lot. I didn'thave a big sample size. I just had
you. And so it's sointeresting to see though, even though
your story is different from alot of people, there's a lot of the
same feelings and the thingsthat you went through. So what I've
learned over these hundredplus episodes is how alike we are.
(08:39):
Despite all the things and allthe things the world tells us that
makes us different. I thinkwe're all just trying to do the same
thing. And it's just like,enjoy the time that we have and do
it in a purposeful way.
I agree. I mean, I. I thinkthat that's the big thing. Like,
it doesn't. We're all ondifferent journeys, right? But. And
(09:02):
they're all those journeys aretaking different paths and all of
those journeys, you know, butat the end of the day, like, we're
all just trying to get tocontinue on that journey, right?
Like, wake up every day andlike, the core of everything is the
same. And I think that theinteresting thing that you bring
to light is, you know, there'sa lot of different patterns of life
(09:24):
shift, right? Like, there are,like myself that, you know, is kind
of like the divorce is whatstarted it. But then at Life shift
was really like, who I startedto become afterwards and starting
my business and doing this andall of those things. And you've had
a couple other people thathave, like, similar, you know, similar
things. But then there'speople who have had real, like, emotional
trauma or deaths or births or,you know, like so many different
(09:49):
things. And all of those havejust taken people on a different
path. And it's how you reactto that that is really your journey.
It's. It's not the instancethat happens. It's that reaction.
And I think that that'simportant to, to take away.
Oh, for sure. And I've. I'vehad some guests on the show, and
I won't say who, but there aresome that you can tell that have
(10:12):
not reflected on the moment orhow it's affected them. And you can
tell how some people thathave. Are quite different. They're
farther down the road. Theyreally understand the value of it.
Like you even pointed out, youknow, like, I'm thankful that all
that crap happened because itled me to who I am today. I'm the
same. You know, I'm notthankful that my mom died, but I'm.
(10:34):
I'm thankful that I've learnedfrom that experience to bring myself
to this point, because for solong, I hadn't learned from it. And
I lived my life in this spaceof not being able to reflect on it,
not being able to learn fromit, not being able to move forward.
And now that I have, it'slike, oh, this is much more valuable
experience.
Well, and. Yeah, and that'sthe. I think, like, I don't think
(10:58):
I was in that place for a longtime, right? Not thankful for it,
not whatever it is. Like, youdon't have to be thankful per se.
Like, you know, but I keptstumbling down the bricks of that
journey, and I, you know, I. Iliterally just told a friend this
the other day, like, if you'renot going to heal from that, from
(11:20):
that instance, or if you'renot going to heal from your trauma,
you're going to just continueto stumble or you're going to escape
from it. But when you're doneescaping, it's just waiting in the.
It's just waiting in the wingsfor you, right? And you're going
to deal with it and it's goingto be worse. So it's just a matter
of, like, getting to thatpoint. And when I finally accepted,
(11:43):
you know, everything that hadhappened and, you know, just looked
back and was like, you know,not only did I accept everything
that happened in that. In, youknow, in that immediate. I looked
back and I was like, man, youknow, whoever you want to believe
in was sending me signs foryears and, you know, was. And there
(12:04):
was a lot of reasons that Ishouldn't have been with that person
to begin with. And over theyears, I had seen so many different
signs, and I was. When Ilooked back, I was like, man, it
took an absolute rapture topull me away from this person. And
it, you know, I was like, man,I. So I had to heal back from, like,
all of those things. And Covidwas the best thing that ever happened
(12:25):
to me. Like, I feel badBecause I know it wasn't the best
thing for a lot of people, butif it hadn't been for those three
months, quarantining alone bymyself and really like, well, the
only friend you have is yourself.
And TikTok.
And TikTok, exactly. Justthose things. Like, if I hadn't done
that, like, I don't know whereI would be necessarily today. So
(12:49):
I am super thankful for those moments.
You know, I don't know if youshared your story publicly with a
lot of people before this. Didyou hear from anyone, like, that
may have listened to yourepisode or someone in your circle
that you might have sharedthat they. They said any. Any feedback
to you about your episode? Iknow it was a while ago, so I'm wondering
if. If you remember any.
(13:10):
Yes. So I had. Actually, it'sa really funny. I don't know. And
it's funny that you asked thatbecause I actually was dwelling on
that this morning. I nevertold most people anything that happened
between us when we wentthrough the divorce. I got essentially
threatened to keep my mouthclosed and that nobody wanted to
(13:34):
hear my side of the story and,you know, just basically to keep
my mouth closed. And I did outof fear. I didn't talk about it.
People knew I got divorced,obviously, and they knew that he
had cheated and, you know,whatever. They kind of knew the outcome,
but they didn't know a lot ofthe other stuff. They didn't know
how I started my business. AndI think the most interesting thing
(13:56):
was that I got, like, messagesand phone calls from people that
I didn't even know paidattention to my social media. Like.
Like people that I know inpassing or people that, like, I had
worked with back in the day orwhatever, and they were like, I knew
(14:16):
you went through something. Ijust didn't know what it was or it
was just so funny how. I mean,people that I would. I'm like, I
didn't even know we wereconnected on social media that you
saw that and they had listenedto it. And I thought that was so,
like, eye opening. I was like,man. Because again, rem. Like, this
is also your. The first. Thesecond one that you put out, you
(14:38):
released, you know, And I'mlike, the fact that, like, all of
these people were listening toa class project essentially was crazy
to me. And yeah, it was just.And it was. It was, I guess, maybe
like, freeing that, like, Iactually got to like, say that story.
So, yeah, it was reallyinteresting. That's funny that I
actually. I saw somebody'spost about something like that and
(15:02):
I group, I'm in. And Ithought, man, if I could go back
in time, I would have blastedmy story.
Yeah, it's interesting thepower that storytelling has for us,
for those of us that have thestory, that keep the story. Yeah,
I think there's a lot ofpeople that don't share their story
out of, in your case, fear. Mycase, like, maybe a shame that, you
(15:24):
know, I'm a guy shouldn't besad. I shouldn't, you know, share
this, these vulnerable partsbecause society says X, Y and Z.
But once we do share them,there's so much. It's like a. Like
you said, it's freeing in away. It's like it's out there. It's
not, you know, it's not asdrastic as it sounded in my head.
For a lot of us, like, thingskind of build themselves up and then
(15:46):
you say it out loud and you'relike, oh, that's palatable. I can
move forward with that. So Ican, I can relate with that.
And I think sometimes when wespeak, right. Like when, when we
speak it, maybe we don't hearit per se. And especially with something
like this where you can goback. Like when I went back and listened
to was like an out of bodyexperience because it was like two
(16:09):
months later, right. Or amonth later or whatever that it,
you know, and I was on a walkand I was listening to it and I was
like, who is that girl? Like,she's pretty cool. Because you do,
like, you hear it. It's adifferent. Like I don't hear my voice
every day. Right. Like inthat, in that way. And so it was,
it was a really interestingway of like hearing it back and being
(16:30):
like, no, I did a good job.Like, I.
Do you feel validated in yourexperience? Like, when you hear yourself
tell your story, do you feellike, yeah, I did that, I did that
and I did it well and I'mworking through whatever the next
shift in my life might be. Doyou, do you have confidence in that?
Yeah, a lot. Like, because,you know, I really think that, at
(16:53):
least for myself, I can'tspeak for anybody else at this point
in life. I feel like everyyear I have a shift. Right. Like,
I have just. I'm a bigbeliever in if there's an opportunity
in front of you, take it. Evenif that opportunity in, like my current
situation was to relax alittle. And so like life just constantly
(17:16):
is, you know, bobbing andweaving and so being able to, to
go back and listen tosomething that was two years ago.
But talking about somethingthat had happened, it's now almost
seven years later, you know,and, you know, we, when we talk about
things that are life shiftsand like, that incident was very
(17:36):
like, cut and dried to thatmoment. But I think so often it's
like, you know, I would say topeople who are feeling down, like,
you know, are kind of goingthrough the same thing. Like, you're,
you're, you're looking for themass. Like you're looking for Cirque
du Soleil to come out of theceiling, right? And if you really
just looked at the littlemoments, like, that was how I got
(17:59):
through a lot of whatever Istopped looking at. I stopped waiting
for something major to happen.And I was like, okay, well, I got
a front row parking spot atPublix in the middle of the rain,
right? And that's a big win.
Like, perspective shift.
Yeah. Like, so it's likesometimes it's the little things
that happen, right? And if youstart to look at all of those little
(18:22):
things, they do add up tosomething that's big and you're shifting,
like, you know, over time, Ithink in perspective and in all of
those things. So being able togo back and listen to kind of like
that first cake, you know,it's like that first cake that you
make and now where you aretoday, it's like that. Where was
I at two years ago? And here'sa life check in now. Completely different
(18:43):
goals and everything.
I mean, at that point, we weretalking about this Bake off, this
like, Halloween Food NetworkBake off thing that you were a part
of that hadn't even come outyet. So maybe you can catch us up.
Like, what's happened since.
Yeah, so I did Holiday wars onFood Network Season 4.
(19:03):
I think it was episode. Itwasn't Halloween. You're right. Sorry.
It's the same.
I watched same thing.
But yeah, one's Christmas,one's Halloween. So I did that. And
it was probably one of thebest experiences of my life. I just
thought that it was amazinghad gone. And, you know, prior to
doing that, like, my wholeentire goal was, you know, I'm gonna
(19:26):
open this bakery and I'mgonna, you know, I had put at this
point, point pen to paper somany times right to where I found
a space, kind of marked itout, had, you know, an idea, started
putting together that budget,trying to figure out, you know, what
I was going to do. I, youknow, went into a commercial kitchen
(19:46):
and then I went into, youknow, trying to lease A couple different
spaces. And every time I gotto where I was literally right, writing
my about to sign my name,something came up and I was like,
I can't do this. Like, Ican't, I can't, I can't do it. And
I think that over and over andover I kept getting this. Like I,
(20:07):
I was doing too much, right?Like I had a full time job and I
was trying to do, I did thisshow and I was doing these events
and I was producing events andit was just like all of these things
and I kept saying to myself,like, I have to do this. The next
step is this. You know, it'slike people that are in a relationship
and they're like, well, I'mgoing to get married because it's
the next, the next step isthat I have to get married, right?
(20:28):
That's what, like that's theprogression. And so I kept trying
to do that and then somethingthat happened and I'm like, no, I
can't do it. I can't, I'm sosorry. Release the space. I can't
do it. Whatever. And I did theshow and then I realized, like, none
of these people have stores.Like none of these people on these
shows actually have a brickand mortar location. Like I can do
(20:53):
this and not have the brickand mortar, right? Like I can be
on shows and I could be afeatured, you know, baker, chef,
whatever you want to call itat food and wine events throughout
the U.S. like, I could dowhatever. And I just shifted my goals
and I was like, you know, why,why do I have to do this? And then
I decided that I was going tokind of go this other route. I had
(21:16):
an opportunity with a cateringcompany that's a very large catering
company. And I started doingthat and I got the licensing and
I was baking and I ended upworking almost two full time jobs.
Well, really two full timejobs. I was working during the day
that I would come home, startbaking at 5 o'clock, and deliver
their desserts to them at 2o'clock in the morning, grab McDonald's
(21:37):
on the way home, and then comehome, go to bed. And that was my
routine. Four to five nights aweek. I gained a lot of weight and
my thyroid went crazy. Andjust the stress I was putting on
my body just wasn't good. AndI learned in that, I learned from
that two really importantthings. One, I cannot do it all,
(22:00):
and I shouldn't do it all. Andtwo, to never let somebody else drive
your business because I madesome mistakes in letting this catering
company guide my business andhad one big client that was paying.
They were a very big client.But then when they weren't there
(22:21):
anymore, neither was mybusiness. And it was great to learn
it at such like a small scaleversus having really like built a
business and then, you know,lost, you know, lost it at that point.
So I just shifted a lot inwhat I decided to do and I no longer
am planning on opening a spaceanytime soon. I don't know if I ever
(22:44):
will. I went through thecasting process again last, last
year and I can't say for wherebecause I'm under NDA again, but
made it all the way to the endand I was supposed to be leaving
to go film and the day beforeI was leaving, got told I wasn't
going, they had passed, andthen decided to go with somebody
(23:07):
else. And that was another bigblow. And again another one of those
things where it's like, okay,I just learned that lesson twice
because I didn't learn itright the first time. Right. Never
to put all your eggs in onebasket. And I did that again. And
I think we just keep learningthe same lesson until. Till it's
beat into our souls. And sothis year I have some new goals and
(23:30):
working on doing that castingone more time, trying to make it
for this year. It's been aninteresting ride this last year.
Yeah. But I think you're at aspace now. It seems that when these
things are happening, you'vehad enough time to reflect on, you
know, the value of, you know,of course they suck in the moment
(23:51):
and they suck the couple weeksafter. But then when you reemerge,
you make new goals, you makenew plans. It sounds like there's
this, this evolution of sortsin which you're like, okay, yeah,
that didn't serve me. And nowI know that I wasn't chasing that
for the right reason. Right,yeah, that's what I'm assuming.
Well, like I am just so Ialways say, like I'm task oriented.
(24:16):
Right. I need to have a to dolist of things and I need to have
like, you know, daily, weekly,monthly, quarterly, yearly, whatever
it is. Like I kind of need tohave a direction. If I don't have
a direction of where I'mgoing, I will lay down and watch
Netflix all day.
(24:36):
Which sometimes is okay.
Which sometimes is okay. Butthat's like it if you have. If I
have no goal or no end path.Right. And it's. It was like after
somebody told said to me,after I did that show, I said, okay,
well, I hit the goal. I madeit onto a show, and that was, you
know, that was the big goal.Right? Now I want to host one or
(24:57):
be a judge. And I think itwas. My mom was like, you should
slow down. Like, you were onone show and you lost. Like, maybe
you should just set a goal tobe on a show again. And I was like,
no, I don't work that waybecause the goals are big. If you
make baby goals, like, peoplewill say, like, oh, you make baby
goals to step up to it. I'mlike, no, I make big goals because
(25:21):
everything that's that babygoal will get you to that goal regardless.
So, yeah, I made it onto ashow. Well, now I want to judge or
now I want to host one. Sowhat do I have to do? I have to be
on other shows and I have tocontinue cooking and creating content.
All of that leads up to thatbig goal. But if I'm only working
towards the baby ones, then I'll.
But there's more checklists,right? But that's more checks on
(25:43):
your list. So maybe you shouldhave 25 baby goals and then that
big goal at the end, thenyou'll be checking things off all
the time.
Well, I feel like I Like, youknow, when people talk about, like,
manifestation, right? Likemanifesting your goals. So once I
hit it, then that becomes myreality. So now I know I can be on
the show proven, tried andtrue. So that's no longer the goal.
(26:08):
That's a task.
Okay.
Like, so now I've created thebig goal that's up here and now doing
one to two other shows andthen creating some content. Like,
all of these things fall intotask as tasks. So I already, like,
in con, like, I already know Ican do that. So now it's the next.
And I sound. I don't know,sometimes I think it sounds egotistical,
(26:30):
but, like, I already did it. Icould do it again.
I don't think it is. I thinkfor some people like myself who've.
I've always had elements ofself doubt. Like, no matter if I
graduate with a 4.0 or, youknow, whatever it might be, there's
always that doubt. Like, oh,did I earn it? Did maybe just it
was easy, or, you know, like,whatever it might be. And so for
(26:51):
people that. That think, likeme, it might. It might sound like,
well, you did it once. Can youdo it again? Whereas you. I love
this mentality of, like, I didit once, I can clearly do it again.
Which is like, kind of whatI'm trying to work towards. In my.
My confidence and. And thenthose pieces. But I love it. So it
(27:13):
doesn't. I don't think itsounds egotistical. I think it sounds
admirable. I think it soundslike a place that I hope to get to.
And so I hope you get tojudging the show and doing. Or hosting
it and doing whatever you.Whatever's next. I think Jug. Judging
and then hosting. Is that howthat order goes?
Yeah, probably judging andthen hosting or one or the other
or however. I don't even knowhow it goes. I don't even know what
(27:35):
the progress would be. Butit's so funny. Like, like you said,
and I always tell you this,like, we talk about this, and I'm
like, you know, you have toget past your imposter syndrome.
Like, that is something that,like, you just have to look at, like,
the signs around you. Like,you know, in terms for you particularly,
like, you. You. You're. You'rewinning awards and people are noticing
(27:57):
you. And like, this. The LifeShift podcast has really kind of
become its own thing. And it'sreally, like, growing and it's, you
know, like, you sent me one ofthem and I'm like, dude, you're.
You. You're on a list of 10 or25 or whatever it was with, like,
who is celebrity DrewBarrymore or Reese Witherspoon?
Amy Poehler.
Amy Poehler, my favorite. AndI'm like, that's hu. Of everything
(28:20):
that she had to accomplish inher life to get on, even noticed
and put on that. And youstarted as a. As a class and have
taken it to this. So thinkabout that.
I regret how I responded tothat because at first I was just
like, oh, well, someone waslike, how do you feel about this?
And I was like, well, I feellike I'll just be overlooked because
look at all these famouspeople there. And then they were
(28:43):
like, no, Matt, look whoyou're on this list with. And I was
like, oh, you're right. Like,I feel really crappy for. My first
response was like, oh, I'mjust going to be overlooked. And
so you're right. I. I need to.I think a lot of people need to kind
of just adopt that of like,this confidence and imposter syndrome
is real and it's hard andit's. It exists, but there's a way
(29:05):
through. And you're kind ofproof of that. Like, I did it. I
can do it again. No big deal.Here we go. I'm going to accomplish
these tasks.
And we're. It's Just. It'sjust another side of the spectrum.
Right? Like, there's impostersyndrome on this side, and then there's
where I'm on the other side,where I'm. I'm always like, oh, I
could do that. And it doesn'tmatter what it is. Like, I'm like,
(29:28):
oh, well, if I had theeducation, I could be a doctor. You
know, like, it's justeducation that smart. And it's bad.
I don't know why I alwaysthink that.
But is it bad?
I don't know if it's bad. Imean, I guess because. And it's.
It's funny because I don'tthink it's. I guess where I, like,
(29:48):
play into it is I don't thinkof myself any better than anyone
else, and I don't think ofanyone else better than me. We're
all either at differentstations of life or different levels
of education. Right. Andthere's other things that play into
that, because there are peoplewho, you know, like, there are people
who just aren't as smart asother people or people who are more
street smart than otherpeople. You know, like, there's different
(30:08):
things, but in terms of justthe average person, we're all on
the same playing field. It'sjust a matter of who. Who learned
the books or, you know, whosaid yes. Right? Who said yes. Right.
Like, so I know better thananyone else, and no one else. And
no one else is better than me.I just feel like it's all down to
opportunity that comes up andwhether or not you take it or move
(30:30):
forward.
No, I love it. I love this.This version of you because even
listening to that episodetoday, you sound different. You sound
like you're in a differentconfidence space. I mean, it wasn't
like you didn't soundconfident then, but it almost sounds
like you're even more evolvedinto what you want to do and. And
the direction that you go. AndI could be completely delusional
(30:50):
right now and just making thatup, but really listening to that,
it. I feel like we've matured,you know, like, there's. There's
something in our lives as.Because you were just turning, like,
20 something in that episode.So you're like. Yeah, you're just.
You're just like mid-20s now.And, you know, we went to high school
together 25 years ago, butwe'll just pretend that that doesn't
(31:10):
exist.
I know. I don't know how wewere in High School 25 years ago,
and I'm only 32.
Yeah.
It's the math. Ain't nothing,but I'm with it.
Yeah. If. If someone wasthinking about, like, sharing their
story for the first time withsomeone, not necessarily on a podcast,
because that's a big asksometimes, but is there anything
that you would want to advisepeople if they were, you know, kind
(31:34):
of. They feel like they wantto share their story, but they're
kind of not sure just yet. Isthere any. Any advice after sharing
your story that maybe could behelpful to them?
Yeah, I mean, I think that forme, the. I would say that one of
my biggest regrets, like I hadsaid, was not telling my side of
(31:55):
the story and, you know,letting somebody else make me live
in fear over that side, overmy. My story. Right. And I do, to
some effect, think thatthere's, you know, depending on the.
Depending on the, you know,how deep that is, if it's trauma,
if it's, you know, whatever.Like, there are some. There are some
pieces where it's like,sometimes sharing your story does
(32:19):
really hurt somebody else.Right? But if you can put into words
what your side of that storyis that isn't maliciously intended
to hurt somebody else, but isreally, like, your truth, I think
that you should share it, iffor nothing else. Like, sometimes.
Sometimes I think that, like Ialways say, like, with keyboard warriors,
(32:41):
right, like, it's really easyto type something or it's really
easy, like, write it, becauseyou don't have to pay attention to
somebody else's eyeballs andwhat, you know, how they're reacting
to it and all of that. Butwhen you are telling somebody, whether
it's verbally, like one. Onone or on a phone or in a podcast
or, you know, any of that, Ithink you hear that side of the story
(33:01):
from the perspective, like,the sound makes you think about it,
and you're like, well, maybeI'm crazy. Or like, did that really
happen? Or was that timeline.Like, is the timeline in my. In my
head correct? Or. You know, Ithink you start to work through those
things, which is why even.Even telling your stories in therapy
(33:21):
makes such a big deal. It'swhy therapy, I think, works so well,
because it's not necessarilywhat the person is telling you or
the work they're telling youto do. It's. It's you solving your
own problems. I have literallysaid things out loud to a therapist
and been like, no, I'm good.I. I heard it. I heard it. We don't
(33:42):
even need to go deeper. Iheard it, you know, and I think that
that's so important to hearthose things. It does make a big
difference when you're justlike, thinking versus saying, I agree.
I've, I've had guests on theshow that they'll be telling their
story and they're like, Iliterally haven't thought about that.
That, like, just popped intomy brain. And so there's something
(34:03):
about the, the action of, ofsaying that, you know, while you
were saying that, like,sometimes it's easier to type it
out or it's easier to, like,write it out than it is to say it
out loud. You just think of,like, the first time you told someone
that you love them to theirface and how hard that the first
time saying those three wordswas. Yeah, I think for a lot of us,
we can relate to that. It'smuch easier to type it out or text
(34:24):
it or something along thoselines, saying those words. Right.
And so I think, you know,thank you for trusting me with your
story. So early on, before wereally knew anything was going to
happen at the end of thatepisode, I said, you know, this is
the first episode and maybethere'll be a couple more. And you're
like, there's going to be somany more. I'm like, yeah, right.
(34:46):
Well, you were right. So thankyou for trusting me and just believing
in this journey and forsharing this update with the Patreon
supporters. I reallyappreciate you.
Absolutely. Of course. Loveit. Glad to be here.
I didn't give you anopportunity to say your, your name
poem. So sometimes people callyou Shanna, sometimes people call
(35:07):
you Shauna.
So you tell them Charlottealso is.
Charlotte is a good one.
Yeah, always. Yeah. So my nameis Shauna Benson. It's. It's spelled
wrong, but it's like Russia,Shauna, without the rush. Except
for I'm always rushing, soit's fitting. Just call me Rosh Hashanah.
I love it. So if people wantto, like people listening right now,
if they want to connect withyou, is that something you'd welcome?
(35:30):
And if so, how can they get inyour world and see what you're doing?
Yeah, so they can always. Ilove sharing or talking to people
that, you know, connectingwith people in a multi. Multitude
of ways. They can always getme on Instagram at the Shawna Benson
or at no Regrets Dessert codeon Instagram. Those are the easiest
ways to get me.
(35:52):
Perfect. I'll put those in theshow notes. That way, if any of the
Patreon people are listeningand they want to do that, they can
just click on it and it'll beeasy for them. So thanks again and
for those of you listening,thank you for your support. It helps
me. I'm a one person team, soit helps me cover software costs
and hardware costs and all thethings that come along with being
(36:12):
an indie podcaster. So Iappreciate you. Thank you so much
for your support and I will beback next month with another bonus
episode for the Patreon feed.For more information, please visit
(36:34):
www.thelifeshiftpodcast.com.
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