December 1, 2025 • 19 mins
Sunny Sanskari Ki Tulsi Kumari is more like a sitcom written by a Dharma committee than a proper movie.
We discuss Varun Dhawan’s seemingly stagnant evolution as an actor, Janhvi Kapoor moving in the opposite direction, and Sanya Malhotra and Rohit Saraf happily accepting the paycheque.
We also talk about the film’s incoherent narrative, unimaginative plot, and strange lack of confidence.
—
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:16):
Hi, I'm Akara. And I'm Ruhan Nahal.
Welcome to the long take. This week we're discussing the
new movie from the guy who gave us, and now it's called Yeah.
Why does this nonsense exist? I have no patience for these
things. I don't know, I think there's
like some set template where they know it's like a mutual
(00:38):
fund, you know, like if you put.No, I think it's like Varun
Dhawan was like every couple of years he goes to Shashank Ketan.
He's like, I need a movie. You go pitch to Dharma, please.
Thank you. That could be it.
And Dharma is like OK. Dharma is like OK for what
reason? I have no idea that I don't know
how that deal happens, but between Shashank and Varun I am
pretty confident this is how it works.
(00:59):
Yeah, I the sad part is that Varun Dhawan started doing this
movie with Alia Bhatt, and now Alia Bhatt is clearly not
interested in doing movies with Varun Dhawan.
Yeah, yeah. Because she's, like, found out,
like, oh, wait, I don't want to be this person.
I want to be a different actressand do different movies and
Varun Dhawan basically be the same guy he was playing eleven
years ago. Yeah, nothing has changed.
And in fact worse because now inthis movie he's taking like
(01:21):
jokes at himself right where someone calls him and we using
teacher D or something. Yeah, it's like and the junior
NTR to his Hrithik Roshan is Rohit Sarah Foods like totally
from Network. Territory.
Yeah, this is a jumble of like different things.
Like that's not just the only, that's the only Netflix thing,
which is another primitive thingin as well.
(01:43):
The person who gave us four moreshots, please, is writing the
dialogues with Shashank here. She's also the person who wrote
Rocky Rani Ibrahim Kahani. Yeah, Shashank also wrote that.
So I don't know how you guys areat that movie and then also
write this. One, because see, I was
wondering. So it's almost as if two things
can happen, right? One is that the acting is far
(02:04):
better in Rocky Rani, so that immediately makes all the jokes
better. And B.
So essentially the script that is delivered versus the script
that is short are different. Probably like.
There's a lot there because otherwise it doesn't make sense
because the templates are. The same, right?
How are the same people writing it?
Like I have no idea, but I thinkit's definitely the acting
because one of the word honestly, I don't know why his
(02:26):
characters change. They should just call him the
same character in every movie and we like it's yeah, universe,
the same guy. It goes to parallel, reverses
and does this nonsense in every unit because so that is
obviously an issue. Type of character like he's very
easily he can be like a rocky Randhawa from that movie right
and the Sanya Nuthra character is very hoity doity like from
(02:46):
and that's the reason why they don't end up together is because
the families don't like whateverRJ wo hote so even like and it's
supposedly Delhi although we don't really see Delhi at all.
I am convinced that once. Yeah, they had one resort, or
basically they're in sound stages.
Yeah, like 1. The resort was they shot like a
(03:06):
plate and this chip card everywhere.
Some of the songs concerts are bigger than the actual sites.
That is very true, and there area lot of.
Songs. There are a lot of songs for no
reason. Yeah, yeah.
They just like jump into a song.They're like, oh, we need to
invent more function at this wedding.
OK, Q song. And after a point, even the
movie is like, but why are you still here?
Like to me to invite they have to find reason.
(03:30):
That that that is Coco's job. Coco's job entire movie is to
make the worst jokes, some of them possibly like homophobic,
and then keep inviting them to anew function so they can plot
justify by this way here and afterward I was like, don't do
it right, actually, don't justify.
I would love that more actually,because I feel like this movie
would benefit if it was 35% moreabsurd.
(03:53):
Yeah, like these people refuse to leave and it becomes a little
weird, Yeah. Like, it needs to actually go
into that territory of just like, you know, like snakes in a
plane level. Yeah.
That these people are like, really, really, really crazy
also. And to have come up with this
plan and then people are tellingthem to like leave or whatever,
but they keep sneaking back in and yeah.
(04:13):
Like I would love it more if themovie went to like 5 different
continents and they were still there.
Like they know every functions are different.
They know how they mentioned like scar honeymoon 7 countries.
So if the movie actually kept moving every like country for
every function I would not mind.Because anyway, it's just like
Karanjore produce movie so take it to a different level.
Yeah, they have so much money every function in there to a
different country and you can somehow keep arriving.
(04:35):
Oh yeah, let's go with it. Because they try.
Because the cuckoo person is like just trying to ground it in
some, like as if we have that concern, like as if the audience
is sitting. No one cares.
I know they need to be here for the movie to go keep going on,
so just push it into the statosphere.
Because, as we all know, like the wedding planner decides who
(04:57):
the guests are in real life. Like that doesn't make sense.
It's like full Vohis archetypes here, like the Ahmed Bashir
character from Rocky, Rani is the Akshay Oberoi character in
this movie, etcetera, etcetera. You know?
But obviously there's no, there's not enough back story.
(05:18):
It's all just delivered in boutsof exposition, especially with
like Janhvi Kapoor's character, right?
Mary Papa, we don't really see it in action.
We don't really see the Father. And then then Varun Dhawan go
and repeat that back story to someone's face and I'm like have
you heard it 4 minutes ago from the person's mouth?
So why are you repeating it to the param guy on his face?
(05:41):
We know it. Like why are you doing this?
Why are you mind spinning? Second screen viewing and this
movie is designed for like Netflix or something.
Yeah, yeah. I have heard that like Tom now
so much that there is literally a thing now.
Like movies are being designed like that.
Yeah, yeah. This is one of those movies,
right? Like everybody loudly announced
where we are. And but there is also, like,
(06:01):
weird, confusing stuff, which I feel like they briefly initiate
some sort of friendship forming between the two guys, which they
abandoned completely. Yeah, they do.
This like 1 upmanship between a woman in like 1 bathroom scene
which they also abandoned then after.
Oh yeah, which is in the same moment, right, which is
happening parallel disgusting. Both scenes are discussed.
(06:22):
They're. Doing it like full like, you
know, as they're gazelles in thewild and comparing their horns
or whatever. And then you they're like
bonding. And I'm just like, OK, this will
go somewhere, but then it doesn't.
It doesn't. That's really, that was a really
sick kind of somebody came up with a sick idea and they're
like, let's shoot it. And they kept in the movie and
it was performed by 4 people andokayed by dozens of others and
(06:42):
we watched it and we're like 8 second.
Just give us another song if this is what they're going to do
instead. No, not ever.
The song or what? Oh my God the songs are the
worst. And there's no like 1 upmanship
in the songs. At least use it for that, you
know, like one person is dancing, doing like the really
complicated steps and the other person, yeah.
(07:04):
I, I honestly that I wish in that ballroom scene where they
do it only once, where like after these two perform very
well and they're like being veryclose to each other and then
they come like do their ballet or whatever and they kiss.
I was like, Oh my God. Like they had finally hit upon
something. I felt the movie could have been
the entire movie should have been a dance off.
(07:24):
But then there it basically likea collection of situations,
right? Because the dance off happens
and there is like a yoga scene where the same thing happens.
And then there's another scene where the same thing happens.
And then it's just like AB hum is situation we have now.
We're going to behave like we'rein a sitcom.
And yeah, it's just going aroundin circles.
It doesn't even make sense because in the end they fall for
(07:46):
each other in like a week or something which is super strange
but literally. Exactly that Aranya says she
can't marry Vikram right? She's like Oh yeah only only one
for five days. I think it was infatuation and
I'm like but isn't what is between Sunny and Tulsi then
also infatuation? Are you undermining your own
point if you allow the characterto say these words?
Don't bring it up. Nah like just be like who cares?
(08:09):
You're a stupid movie, just embrace it.
I know I would love it. So I literally I was like, if
this movie has 10,000 more Bollywood metahemor references
and as a dance off, I think I would I would at least be like,
Oh yeah, OK, you hit upon something and you held
steadfast. You like, this is what we want
to do and we're going to do it for two hours instead of doing,
as you said, like 10,000 other things.
(08:30):
Do you know what? I'm going to say something
blasphemous. I think Shandar is a better
movie than this. And Shandar is a widely hated
movie. Yeah, but I'll tell you why.
Because what you're saying like it's like in on the joke and
it's like fully ridiculous. That movie was, you know, that
movie has an entire family that enters a wedding wearing gold,
(08:52):
like shiny gold outfits. That movie has a scene in which
Karan Johar comes and actually does coffee with Karan at a
wedding. You know, there's an animated
sequence. All the musical sequences are
properly designed in that movie because someone has put a
thought behind it. Actual musical sequences, not
just, you know, dancing on a fake stage.
So all of the ridiculousness that I think we expected from a
(09:16):
movie like this has already happened.
People have said no, which is why I feel OK, it's me.
They were like, oh, let's just so.
They basically ideas are pitchedlike the first draft of this.
You're saying essentially might have could have been possibly
closer to Shandar was taken to Dharma Studios and then it just
made like 1000 crosses. They were like, no, you're
taking it too far, tone and out.Correct.
You're taking it too far. We need to explain the
(09:38):
absurdities. We need to make this.
I don't know for the Gen. Z audience.
Yeah, you do creative by committee, and that's what you
end up with. Hey, yeah, Kesar, a youth
audience just like. A let them out, man.
Like that's what I hate. Like if you're going to go full
out, like you have to go full out.
You cannot be restrained doing parody, slapstick, absurd
(09:59):
comedy. You cannot.
You have to go like so bonkers. It has to be like Naked Gun
level or you stop like much before.
Not here. Also, what is this youth
targeted movie? Just me?
Varun Dhawan looks like 20 yearsolder than everybody else.
Like, yeah. It does not work for me at all.
I was like, yeah to Banda 45 year old 3020.
(10:23):
Even his best friend Bantu lookslike 20 years younger.
Like college, it's believable. Given and.
One of those dudes which is likein college hanging out.
Yeah, forever. Like these things also?
Will stop mattering if you make the movie more absurd, right,
because it's like you will just go along with it like it doesn't
matter, like that's the point. But because they tried to
(10:45):
grounded in something, they're like, no, they actually flew
out. And they're saying things like
we have 70 hours to do, like do this.
And I'm like, no, like stop making sense.
Stop going to make sense. It doesn't matter if you have 5
days or seven functions, just keep going on.
It should feel like the wedding has been happening for two weeks
at the end of the movie. And I would still love it if you
just did not explain it to me. Yeah, yeah, they have to
(11:07):
explain. I think I have a function here.
I because function. Because they keep explaining it,
they're actually keep starting to find hoes, right?
Like how do they go from that dancing stage to lying on the
ground as if like they had Kollywood or something?
Anywhere so old people are like in some I can't even tell these
movies apart at this point because they're all like.
I can't Like, we literally had like Johnny Kapoor, like Param
(11:28):
Sundari, like what, less than two months ago?
Which is worse? That's a tough one, yeah.
That's a tough one. And then like, which is the bold
movie has the same shot literally of like spinning
around the characters as they kiss.
And I'm like, you know, Deja, who I would do.
It is weird, right? Because these two debuted like
almost more than half a decade before her, right?
And they're supposed to be playing the same, Yeah.
(11:49):
That's the issue. Like both Varun Navan and Sudhar
Malhotra are too old for two romance.
Janhi Kapoor, please do not stop.
Too old to play students in their first imagine?
Yes, that is true. Whereas Janhvi Kapoor reads
younger than she actually is, you know, on screen, even though
they're trying to age her up in both this one and with the
(12:09):
really unfortunate choice of wardrobe, which I'm like, E cow
or am I? Can we please behave normally?
What are you for? Is it like a movie thing or is
it like her personal stylist is trying to enforce?
Yeah, I don't know how these things happen.
I feel like she's big enough that what you said, the second
thing is also plausible now thatshe's probably bringing her own
(12:29):
board instead of letting the costume design and design for
what's better for the. Costume design, the whole
personal stylist. OK, Abhi you wedding scene you
want ha ha, we'll design. And then suddenly the director.
Has decided come. Deal with someone showing up
like we don't like what is the purpose?
Like she's supposed to be some very like Gharelu type woman and
(12:50):
then she discovers that she is basically PT Zinta from Kelowna.
Yeah, that's what he tells us. No, like before they arrive,
Varuna was like, your time to become parvo.
He's a poo. She has an instant makeover
because Varuna is basically enforcing all of that.
And then? He gets scared of her when she
like whatever unleashes her in her poo.
But yeah, everything is really weird.
The weird stuff isn't weird enough, and the stuff that they
(13:11):
think is normal is really weird.Yeah, that's the thing.
Like this is what happens when you, and that's this is out of
the director eventually is that you totally haven't handle on
what scene is supposed to play as what scene.
So you shoot it as one thing andthen you take it to edit and
then you chain somethings aroundand then it plays a different
thing. And then they don't really
(13:32):
filter then like that, that thing where they're crawling on
all fours that does. Not so stupid.
That movie does. That scene does not belong in
this movie because this movie isnot absurd enough.
That scene belongs in Like a Wolf of Wall Street.
And and it requires somebody like Leo to perform it, yeah,
and commit to the bit. Because the rest of the movie is
not on that level. I mean suddenly an outtake you
(13:55):
shot and for something that you left it in.
Also like I don't know if this is true but it definitely feels
as if there is some sort of likewhy this happening and may have
seen Zada Karo. Because that's why, that's why
the Rohit Sarif is there. That's the that he's not getting
the respect because the cast deliberate teen actor who does
(14:17):
not even match like. And once the the biggest like in
joke of the movie is to get her get his mismatched Co star at
the end right as if like that like that is the biggest like
reference of the movie makes. I don't know.
No. I mean, I think this is
essentially A4 quadrant A, right?
And then I'm trying to hit 1 quadrant with what you just
(14:38):
mentioned, yeah. And then the other quadrants
with like Manish Paul, which is like the uncle anti groud.
Yeah, yeah, which is like a truelike it hits like I was on I
don't know why I was in IMDb. I think I was booking up
Shashanka work for this and there are people who are saying
nine stars for this movie out of10 and in their review they'll
say area for improvement here. I'm like 9 the movie.
(14:59):
Ends and then the movie turns into its own sequel also and I
was like 8 seconds. Why you tried to compress an
entire movie in 20 minutes of the last act?
Like the movie needs to end at the point where the Akshay says
who's the friend of Bantu, BantuBantu says and cart.
(15:26):
And then it needs to be an entire movie after that, not 20
minutes. And then there's a song at the
end I remembered, like over the credits.
No, that song is full. Like, I love how the movies are
always, like, trying to like, beabout family values and like,
you know, like up near family can be searching anyway.
They'll do a scene that is more fitting in, like, I don't know,
some magic mic or something. Yeah.
(15:46):
Yeah, it's really disastering Eko Tum Nepuri movie, Musko
objectified. Kit Nazada.
And in the end, as if, you know,just to like remind you, yeah,
Yeah, that was on purpose. Here's one more, and this one
here's. One for the uncles to stay back
through the credits. Yeah, and not rush out to get a
parking message. Yeah, when do you?
Think we'll get the third quarter from Janvi after for
(16:08):
like Param Sundari. That's where is the you think
there's another one around the corner?
Or does she like wake up like Alia Bhatt one day?
I'm like, oh, wait, I want to act now.
Which she did, and nobody watched that movie,
unfortunately. Yeah, I guess Alia Bhatt made
bigger choices and like homebound see how far like to do
mainstream level. Yeah, I I don't know if because
she started off doing lead rolesin like solo movies, like Good
(16:34):
Luck, Jerry, Millie, whatever, whatever, whatever, all of those
were riding on her shoulders. And then one day she decided, K,
no, this is not good. Like things that people build a
world in their careers. She did at the start, and she's
going in the opposite direction.She's now playing arm candy or
whatever, Yeah, which is I guessseen as progress in Bollywood.
(16:58):
Yeah, I'm sure like as as financial remuneration while it
must be a progress because I'm sure you don't get paid from
good luck Jerry's and millies asmuch as like doing these.
I mean. That is like doubtful like you
can ask like Shahrukh Khan also why he does it never stops that
(17:18):
great thought love. So let's not go that way.
Open that can of Yeah. I'm sure Sanya Malhotra earned
more from here. Like probably 3-4 XYX then
misses. Could be she probably earned
more from that deal, but did youwatch that money that in the
movie? Which one the most recent one
Thug life. Thug life man there is.
So the whole movie is like KamalHaasan being a thug or whatever.
(17:42):
And there is one like dance sequence in which Sanya Malhotra
comes and that's the only time we see her.
Wow. So she's like a side character
in a dance sequence who's not even introduced.
So she probably earned more fromthat or whatever is left on the
cutting room floor than misses. The funny thing is like there's
a scene in this movie where likeVarun Dhawan is sitting down
with Sonia and she basically tells her that her future looks
(18:04):
like misses. Like she made that movie
already. Like maybe you could have used
like a Bollywood reference here given you are making meta
references everywhere else but not smart enough.
That's probably true. Or she could turn into like
Ananya Pandey's character from that show who runs away from the
thing. Call me BAE, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh God, don't remind me of that.
(18:25):
Also Karan Johar. Yeah, seriously, Karan Johar, we
make like 50 of these, and then one Rocky Rani.
And then we have to like what's supposed to forgive him for 30
years? No, no, we're supposed to
forgive him for five years for Rocky Rani, which is nearing
completion that tenure. We have to forgive him for 20
years for Homebound. No, yeah, that I'm not.
Doing 20 is good. I'm not letting him off the
(18:47):
whole. See you make homebound and then
you get like free pass for in mybook.
I can't suffer through 35 more. Sorry for one homebound.
I mean, think about it, OK? Fair and the fact that like they
were able to manage most of the movie without like getting
chopped up into like 1000 pieces.
That's all for this episode of the Long Take.
(19:08):
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review where episode and we willsee you next week.
Thanks for listening.
Hi, I'm Akara. And I'm Ruhan Nahal.
Welcome to the long take. This week we're discussing the
new movie from the guy who gave us, and now it's called Yeah.
Why does this nonsense exist? I have no patience for these
things. I don't know, I think there's
like some set template where they know it's like a mutual
(00:38):
fund, you know, like if you put.No, I think it's like Varun
Dhawan was like every couple of years he goes to Shashank Ketan.
He's like, I need a movie. You go pitch to Dharma, please.
Thank you. That could be it.
And Dharma is like OK. Dharma is like OK for what
reason? I have no idea that I don't know
how that deal happens, but between Shashank and Varun I am
pretty confident this is how it works.
(00:59):
Yeah, I the sad part is that Varun Dhawan started doing this
movie with Alia Bhatt, and now Alia Bhatt is clearly not
interested in doing movies with Varun Dhawan.
Yeah, yeah. Because she's, like, found out,
like, oh, wait, I don't want to be this person.
I want to be a different actressand do different movies and
Varun Dhawan basically be the same guy he was playing eleven
years ago. Yeah, nothing has changed.
And in fact worse because now inthis movie he's taking like
(01:21):
jokes at himself right where someone calls him and we using
teacher D or something. Yeah, it's like and the junior
NTR to his Hrithik Roshan is Rohit Sarah Foods like totally
from Network. Territory.
Yeah, this is a jumble of like different things.
Like that's not just the only, that's the only Netflix thing,
which is another primitive thingin as well.
(01:43):
The person who gave us four moreshots, please, is writing the
dialogues with Shashank here. She's also the person who wrote
Rocky Rani Ibrahim Kahani. Yeah, Shashank also wrote that.
So I don't know how you guys areat that movie and then also
write this. One, because see, I was
wondering. So it's almost as if two things
can happen, right? One is that the acting is far
(02:04):
better in Rocky Rani, so that immediately makes all the jokes
better. And B.
So essentially the script that is delivered versus the script
that is short are different. Probably like.
There's a lot there because otherwise it doesn't make sense
because the templates are. The same, right?
How are the same people writing it?
Like I have no idea, but I thinkit's definitely the acting
because one of the word honestly, I don't know why his
(02:26):
characters change. They should just call him the
same character in every movie and we like it's yeah, universe,
the same guy. It goes to parallel, reverses
and does this nonsense in every unit because so that is
obviously an issue. Type of character like he's very
easily he can be like a rocky Randhawa from that movie right
and the Sanya Nuthra character is very hoity doity like from
(02:46):
and that's the reason why they don't end up together is because
the families don't like whateverRJ wo hote so even like and it's
supposedly Delhi although we don't really see Delhi at all.
I am convinced that once. Yeah, they had one resort, or
basically they're in sound stages.
Yeah, like 1. The resort was they shot like a
(03:06):
plate and this chip card everywhere.
Some of the songs concerts are bigger than the actual sites.
That is very true, and there area lot of.
Songs. There are a lot of songs for no
reason. Yeah, yeah.
They just like jump into a song.They're like, oh, we need to
invent more function at this wedding.
OK, Q song. And after a point, even the
movie is like, but why are you still here?
Like to me to invite they have to find reason.
(03:30):
That that that is Coco's job. Coco's job entire movie is to
make the worst jokes, some of them possibly like homophobic,
and then keep inviting them to anew function so they can plot
justify by this way here and afterward I was like, don't do
it right, actually, don't justify.
I would love that more actually,because I feel like this movie
would benefit if it was 35% moreabsurd.
(03:53):
Yeah, like these people refuse to leave and it becomes a little
weird, Yeah. Like, it needs to actually go
into that territory of just like, you know, like snakes in a
plane level. Yeah.
That these people are like, really, really, really crazy
also. And to have come up with this
plan and then people are tellingthem to like leave or whatever,
but they keep sneaking back in and yeah.
(04:13):
Like I would love it more if themovie went to like 5 different
continents and they were still there.
Like they know every functions are different.
They know how they mentioned like scar honeymoon 7 countries.
So if the movie actually kept moving every like country for
every function I would not mind.Because anyway, it's just like
Karanjore produce movie so take it to a different level.
Yeah, they have so much money every function in there to a
different country and you can somehow keep arriving.
(04:35):
Oh yeah, let's go with it. Because they try.
Because the cuckoo person is like just trying to ground it in
some, like as if we have that concern, like as if the audience
is sitting. No one cares.
I know they need to be here for the movie to go keep going on,
so just push it into the statosphere.
Because, as we all know, like the wedding planner decides who
(04:57):
the guests are in real life. Like that doesn't make sense.
It's like full Vohis archetypes here, like the Ahmed Bashir
character from Rocky, Rani is the Akshay Oberoi character in
this movie, etcetera, etcetera. You know?
But obviously there's no, there's not enough back story.
(05:18):
It's all just delivered in boutsof exposition, especially with
like Janhvi Kapoor's character, right?
Mary Papa, we don't really see it in action.
We don't really see the Father. And then then Varun Dhawan go
and repeat that back story to someone's face and I'm like have
you heard it 4 minutes ago from the person's mouth?
So why are you repeating it to the param guy on his face?
(05:41):
We know it. Like why are you doing this?
Why are you mind spinning? Second screen viewing and this
movie is designed for like Netflix or something.
Yeah, yeah. I have heard that like Tom now
so much that there is literally a thing now.
Like movies are being designed like that.
Yeah, yeah. This is one of those movies,
right? Like everybody loudly announced
where we are. And but there is also, like,
(06:01):
weird, confusing stuff, which I feel like they briefly initiate
some sort of friendship forming between the two guys, which they
abandoned completely. Yeah, they do.
This like 1 upmanship between a woman in like 1 bathroom scene
which they also abandoned then after.
Oh yeah, which is in the same moment, right, which is
happening parallel disgusting. Both scenes are discussed.
(06:22):
They're. Doing it like full like, you
know, as they're gazelles in thewild and comparing their horns
or whatever. And then you they're like
bonding. And I'm just like, OK, this will
go somewhere, but then it doesn't.
It doesn't. That's really, that was a really
sick kind of somebody came up with a sick idea and they're
like, let's shoot it. And they kept in the movie and
it was performed by 4 people andokayed by dozens of others and
(06:42):
we watched it and we're like 8 second.
Just give us another song if this is what they're going to do
instead. No, not ever.
The song or what? Oh my God the songs are the
worst. And there's no like 1 upmanship
in the songs. At least use it for that, you
know, like one person is dancing, doing like the really
complicated steps and the other person, yeah.
(07:04):
I, I honestly that I wish in that ballroom scene where they
do it only once, where like after these two perform very
well and they're like being veryclose to each other and then
they come like do their ballet or whatever and they kiss.
I was like, Oh my God. Like they had finally hit upon
something. I felt the movie could have been
the entire movie should have been a dance off.
(07:24):
But then there it basically likea collection of situations,
right? Because the dance off happens
and there is like a yoga scene where the same thing happens.
And then there's another scene where the same thing happens.
And then it's just like AB hum is situation we have now.
We're going to behave like we'rein a sitcom.
And yeah, it's just going aroundin circles.
It doesn't even make sense because in the end they fall for
(07:46):
each other in like a week or something which is super strange
but literally. Exactly that Aranya says she
can't marry Vikram right? She's like Oh yeah only only one
for five days. I think it was infatuation and
I'm like but isn't what is between Sunny and Tulsi then
also infatuation? Are you undermining your own
point if you allow the characterto say these words?
Don't bring it up. Nah like just be like who cares?
(08:09):
You're a stupid movie, just embrace it.
I know I would love it. So I literally I was like, if
this movie has 10,000 more Bollywood metahemor references
and as a dance off, I think I would I would at least be like,
Oh yeah, OK, you hit upon something and you held
steadfast. You like, this is what we want
to do and we're going to do it for two hours instead of doing,
as you said, like 10,000 other things.
(08:30):
Do you know what? I'm going to say something
blasphemous. I think Shandar is a better
movie than this. And Shandar is a widely hated
movie. Yeah, but I'll tell you why.
Because what you're saying like it's like in on the joke and
it's like fully ridiculous. That movie was, you know, that
movie has an entire family that enters a wedding wearing gold,
(08:52):
like shiny gold outfits. That movie has a scene in which
Karan Johar comes and actually does coffee with Karan at a
wedding. You know, there's an animated
sequence. All the musical sequences are
properly designed in that movie because someone has put a
thought behind it. Actual musical sequences, not
just, you know, dancing on a fake stage.
So all of the ridiculousness that I think we expected from a
(09:16):
movie like this has already happened.
People have said no, which is why I feel OK, it's me.
They were like, oh, let's just so.
They basically ideas are pitchedlike the first draft of this.
You're saying essentially might have could have been possibly
closer to Shandar was taken to Dharma Studios and then it just
made like 1000 crosses. They were like, no, you're
taking it too far, tone and out.Correct.
You're taking it too far. We need to explain the
(09:38):
absurdities. We need to make this.
I don't know for the Gen. Z audience.
Yeah, you do creative by committee, and that's what you
end up with. Hey, yeah, Kesar, a youth
audience just like. A let them out, man.
Like that's what I hate. Like if you're going to go full
out, like you have to go full out.
You cannot be restrained doing parody, slapstick, absurd
(09:59):
comedy. You cannot.
You have to go like so bonkers. It has to be like Naked Gun
level or you stop like much before.
Not here. Also, what is this youth
targeted movie? Just me?
Varun Dhawan looks like 20 yearsolder than everybody else.
Like, yeah. It does not work for me at all.
I was like, yeah to Banda 45 year old 3020.
(10:23):
Even his best friend Bantu lookslike 20 years younger.
Like college, it's believable. Given and.
One of those dudes which is likein college hanging out.
Yeah, forever. Like these things also?
Will stop mattering if you make the movie more absurd, right,
because it's like you will just go along with it like it doesn't
matter, like that's the point. But because they tried to
(10:45):
grounded in something, they're like, no, they actually flew
out. And they're saying things like
we have 70 hours to do, like do this.
And I'm like, no, like stop making sense.
Stop going to make sense. It doesn't matter if you have 5
days or seven functions, just keep going on.
It should feel like the wedding has been happening for two weeks
at the end of the movie. And I would still love it if you
just did not explain it to me. Yeah, yeah, they have to
(11:07):
explain. I think I have a function here.
I because function. Because they keep explaining it,
they're actually keep starting to find hoes, right?
Like how do they go from that dancing stage to lying on the
ground as if like they had Kollywood or something?
Anywhere so old people are like in some I can't even tell these
movies apart at this point because they're all like.
I can't Like, we literally had like Johnny Kapoor, like Param
(11:28):
Sundari, like what, less than two months ago?
Which is worse? That's a tough one, yeah.
That's a tough one. And then like, which is the bold
movie has the same shot literally of like spinning
around the characters as they kiss.
And I'm like, you know, Deja, who I would do.
It is weird, right? Because these two debuted like
almost more than half a decade before her, right?
And they're supposed to be playing the same, Yeah.
(11:49):
That's the issue. Like both Varun Navan and Sudhar
Malhotra are too old for two romance.
Janhi Kapoor, please do not stop.
Too old to play students in their first imagine?
Yes, that is true. Whereas Janhvi Kapoor reads
younger than she actually is, you know, on screen, even though
they're trying to age her up in both this one and with the
(12:09):
really unfortunate choice of wardrobe, which I'm like, E cow
or am I? Can we please behave normally?
What are you for? Is it like a movie thing or is
it like her personal stylist is trying to enforce?
Yeah, I don't know how these things happen.
I feel like she's big enough that what you said, the second
thing is also plausible now thatshe's probably bringing her own
(12:29):
board instead of letting the costume design and design for
what's better for the. Costume design, the whole
personal stylist. OK, Abhi you wedding scene you
want ha ha, we'll design. And then suddenly the director.
Has decided come. Deal with someone showing up
like we don't like what is the purpose?
Like she's supposed to be some very like Gharelu type woman and
(12:50):
then she discovers that she is basically PT Zinta from Kelowna.
Yeah, that's what he tells us. No, like before they arrive,
Varuna was like, your time to become parvo.
He's a poo. She has an instant makeover
because Varuna is basically enforcing all of that.
And then? He gets scared of her when she
like whatever unleashes her in her poo.
But yeah, everything is really weird.
The weird stuff isn't weird enough, and the stuff that they
(13:11):
think is normal is really weird.Yeah, that's the thing.
Like this is what happens when you, and that's this is out of
the director eventually is that you totally haven't handle on
what scene is supposed to play as what scene.
So you shoot it as one thing andthen you take it to edit and
then you chain somethings aroundand then it plays a different
thing. And then they don't really
(13:32):
filter then like that, that thing where they're crawling on
all fours that does. Not so stupid.
That movie does. That scene does not belong in
this movie because this movie isnot absurd enough.
That scene belongs in Like a Wolf of Wall Street.
And and it requires somebody like Leo to perform it, yeah,
and commit to the bit. Because the rest of the movie is
not on that level. I mean suddenly an outtake you
(13:55):
shot and for something that you left it in.
Also like I don't know if this is true but it definitely feels
as if there is some sort of likewhy this happening and may have
seen Zada Karo. Because that's why, that's why
the Rohit Sarif is there. That's the that he's not getting
the respect because the cast deliberate teen actor who does
(14:17):
not even match like. And once the the biggest like in
joke of the movie is to get her get his mismatched Co star at
the end right as if like that like that is the biggest like
reference of the movie makes. I don't know.
No. I mean, I think this is
essentially A4 quadrant A, right?
And then I'm trying to hit 1 quadrant with what you just
(14:38):
mentioned, yeah. And then the other quadrants
with like Manish Paul, which is like the uncle anti groud.
Yeah, yeah, which is like a truelike it hits like I was on I
don't know why I was in IMDb. I think I was booking up
Shashanka work for this and there are people who are saying
nine stars for this movie out of10 and in their review they'll
say area for improvement here. I'm like 9 the movie.
(14:59):
Ends and then the movie turns into its own sequel also and I
was like 8 seconds. Why you tried to compress an
entire movie in 20 minutes of the last act?
Like the movie needs to end at the point where the Akshay says
who's the friend of Bantu, BantuBantu says and cart.
(15:26):
And then it needs to be an entire movie after that, not 20
minutes. And then there's a song at the
end I remembered, like over the credits.
No, that song is full. Like, I love how the movies are
always, like, trying to like, beabout family values and like,
you know, like up near family can be searching anyway.
They'll do a scene that is more fitting in, like, I don't know,
some magic mic or something. Yeah.
(15:46):
Yeah, it's really disastering Eko Tum Nepuri movie, Musko
objectified. Kit Nazada.
And in the end, as if, you know,just to like remind you, yeah,
Yeah, that was on purpose. Here's one more, and this one
here's. One for the uncles to stay back
through the credits. Yeah, and not rush out to get a
parking message. Yeah, when do you?
Think we'll get the third quarter from Janvi after for
(16:08):
like Param Sundari. That's where is the you think
there's another one around the corner?
Or does she like wake up like Alia Bhatt one day?
I'm like, oh, wait, I want to act now.
Which she did, and nobody watched that movie,
unfortunately. Yeah, I guess Alia Bhatt made
bigger choices and like homebound see how far like to do
mainstream level. Yeah, I I don't know if because
she started off doing lead rolesin like solo movies, like Good
(16:34):
Luck, Jerry, Millie, whatever, whatever, whatever, all of those
were riding on her shoulders. And then one day she decided, K,
no, this is not good. Like things that people build a
world in their careers. She did at the start, and she's
going in the opposite direction.She's now playing arm candy or
whatever, Yeah, which is I guessseen as progress in Bollywood.
(16:58):
Yeah, I'm sure like as as financial remuneration while it
must be a progress because I'm sure you don't get paid from
good luck Jerry's and millies asmuch as like doing these.
I mean. That is like doubtful like you
can ask like Shahrukh Khan also why he does it never stops that
(17:18):
great thought love. So let's not go that way.
Open that can of Yeah. I'm sure Sanya Malhotra earned
more from here. Like probably 3-4 XYX then
misses. Could be she probably earned
more from that deal, but did youwatch that money that in the
movie? Which one the most recent one
Thug life. Thug life man there is.
So the whole movie is like KamalHaasan being a thug or whatever.
(17:42):
And there is one like dance sequence in which Sanya Malhotra
comes and that's the only time we see her.
Wow. So she's like a side character
in a dance sequence who's not even introduced.
So she probably earned more fromthat or whatever is left on the
cutting room floor than misses. The funny thing is like there's
a scene in this movie where likeVarun Dhawan is sitting down
with Sonia and she basically tells her that her future looks
(18:04):
like misses. Like she made that movie
already. Like maybe you could have used
like a Bollywood reference here given you are making meta
references everywhere else but not smart enough.
That's probably true. Or she could turn into like
Ananya Pandey's character from that show who runs away from the
thing. Call me BAE, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh God, don't remind me of that.
(18:25):
Also Karan Johar. Yeah, seriously, Karan Johar, we
make like 50 of these, and then one Rocky Rani.
And then we have to like what's supposed to forgive him for 30
years? No, no, we're supposed to
forgive him for five years for Rocky Rani, which is nearing
completion that tenure. We have to forgive him for 20
years for Homebound. No, yeah, that I'm not.
Doing 20 is good. I'm not letting him off the
(18:47):
whole. See you make homebound and then
you get like free pass for in mybook.
I can't suffer through 35 more. Sorry for one homebound.
I mean, think about it, OK? Fair and the fact that like they
were able to manage most of the movie without like getting
chopped up into like 1000 pieces.
That's all for this episode of the Long Take.
(19:08):
You can follow us on Facebook, Instagram, YouTube and threads
at the Long Take bot. You can write to us at the Long
Take bot@gmail.com. Please leave us a rating and a
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