The Biology Of Hatred, Forgiveness, And Gratitude

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Brain Science Thoughts for Maxwell Certified Speaker Geri Albea Apas, RN.

We trace how resentment narrows the mind and stresses the body, then show how forgiveness and gratitude reverse that pattern through measurable changes in the brain and nervous system. Listeners leave with a clear, testable seven-day practice to shift from contraction to expansion.

• amygdala-driven stress from rehearsed grievances
• cortisol overflow and chronic low-grade inflammation
• prefrontal cortex suppression and cognitive narrowing
• vagus nerve engagement and improved HRV with letting go
• gratitude boosting dopamine and serotonin
• reduced amygdala baseline and better sleep
• practical seven-day gratitude experiment

Each evening, just write down one thing you are genuinely grateful for. Just do that for seven days and pay really close attention.

This podcast is created by Ai for educational and entertainment purposes only and does not constitute professional medical or health advice. Please talk to your healthcare team for medical advice.

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Episode Transcript

SPEAKER_01 (00:00):
Okay, I want you to just for a second close your
eyes and think about the lasttime you felt really weighed
down.
You know that that heavy,contracted feeling.
Yeah.
It's almost always tied tosomething like bitterness or or
some unresolved anger.

SPEAKER_00 (00:16):
Hmm.
A kind of psychological gravity.

SPEAKER_01 (00:18):
Exactly.

SPEAKER_00 (00:18):
And then, you know, contrast that with the complete
opposite.
A moment where this wave of justgenuine appreciation washes over
you.

SPEAKER_01 (00:27):
Yes.

SPEAKER_00 (00:27):
Your whole chest feels expansive, the mind feels
softer.

SPEAKER_01 (00:31):
Aaron Powell Two totally different ways of being.
But what our sources todayreally get into is that these
aren't just, you know, feelings.

SPEAKER_00 (00:38):
No, not at all.

SPEAKER_01 (00:38):
They're two completely different, actually
measurable brain states.

SPEAKER_00 (00:42):
That's right.
I mean, when we talk aboutchronic hatred or or resentment,
we're talking about a veryspecific neurochemical pattern.

SPEAKER_01 (00:49):
A recognizable one.

SPEAKER_00 (00:50):
Entirely.
It's not just some metaphorabout carrying baggage.
It has a real molecular addressin your nervous system.

SPEAKER_01 (00:56):
Aaron Powell So that's our mission for this deep
dive.
What is the actual biologicalcost of holding on to that
contraction?
And what's the relief when wefinally let go?
Okay, let's unpack this.
Starting with the uh thechemistry of contraction.

SPEAKER_00 (01:10):
Right.
So when you're in that sustainednegative state, the whole
mechanism is it's rooted insurvival.
The moment you start reliving agrievance, or even just thinking
about it, you're firing up theamygdala.

SPEAKER_01 (01:23):
Which is the brain's threat detector.

SPEAKER_00 (01:25):
It's the immediate threat detector.
And the thing is, the amygdalaisn't very sophisticated.
It can't tell the differencebetween a real physical threat.

SPEAKER_01 (01:32):
Like a saber-toothed tiger.

SPEAKER_00 (01:34):
Exactly, a saber-toothed tiger right in
front of you, and just a memoryof something that made you angry
five years ago.
Sounds the alarm.

SPEAKER_01 (01:41):
Wow.
So we're treating a ghost fromthe past like a a life or death
emergency happening right now.

SPEAKER_00 (01:46):
And the body responds accordingly.
It kicks the entire stressresponse into overdrive.

SPEAKER_01 (01:50):
Cortisol.

SPEAKER_00 (01:51):
Cortisol floods the system.
Your body goes into fight orflight.
And it maintains that high stateof vigilance, even if you're
just sitting on your couch.
You're fighting a memory, butyour body is paying the price in
real time.

SPEAKER_01 (02:03):
Aaron Powell And I guess the more we do that, the
more we rehearse the anger.

SPEAKER_00 (02:06):
The stronger those pathways become.

SPEAKER_01 (02:08):
We're building super highways for negativity.

SPEAKER_00 (02:11):
That's a perfect way to put it.
Neural circuits strengthen withuse.
And here's where the realcognitive damage starts to show.
Sustained anger actually beginsto suppress the prefrontal
cortex.

SPEAKER_01 (02:21):
The PFC, for anyone who isn't familiar, why is the
PFC so important here?

SPEAKER_00 (02:25):
The PFC is, well, you can think of it as your
brain's CEO.
It's command center.
Exactly.
It's for planning, emotionalregulation, working memory, and
critically, impulse control.
It's the part of the brainthat's supposed to calm down the
overactive amygdala.

SPEAKER_01 (02:42):
But if it's suppressed.

SPEAKER_00 (02:43):
If you're chronically negative, the PFC
basically gets burned out tryingto put out all these fires, it
becomes less active.

SPEAKER_01 (02:49):
So the smart thinking part of the brain gets
quiet and the emergency alarmjust gets louder and louder.

SPEAKER_00 (02:54):
Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (02:54):
But what about that?
That feeling of focus you getwhen you're resentful.
You're so zeroed in on theproblem.
Isn't that a type of clarity?

SPEAKER_00 (03:02):
That's a really insightful question.
But the sources are clear onthis.
It's not clarity, it'snarrowing.

SPEAKER_01 (03:09):
Narrowing.

SPEAKER_00 (03:10):
When the PFC is suppressed, you lose your mental
flexibility.
You just become reactive.
Your ability to feel empathy orto plan for the future, or even
just feel joy, it shrinks.
You're trapped.

SPEAKER_01 (03:23):
Cognitively trapped in a box.

SPEAKER_00 (03:24):
Yes.
Unable to see any solution thatisn't part of the emotional
reaction.

SPEAKER_01 (03:29):
Aaron Powell And let's talk about the physical
bill for this.
The sources really emphasizethat holding this state is it's
metabolically expensive.

SPEAKER_00 (03:37):
Aaron Powell Oh, it's a huge drain on your
resources.
We pay for this chronicactivation with real systemic
problems.

SPEAKER_01 (03:43):
Aaron Powell Like what?

SPEAKER_00 (03:44):
Well, one of the biggest is sustained low-grade
inflammation.
That constant cortisol changesyour bodies.
It's chemical messengers thatregulate inflammation.
Trevor Burrus, Jr.

SPEAKER_01 (03:52):
That's linked to all sorts of other issues.

SPEAKER_00 (03:53):
Aaron Powell It is.
Disrupted sleep, poor immunefunction.
And over time, it just makes youmore vulnerable to long-term
health problems.
That negativity isn't just inyour head, it is physically
wearing your body down.

SPEAKER_01 (04:06):
Wow.
Okay, that alone should be ahuge motivator to shift gears.
Which brings us to expansion.
Let's talk about the biologicalrelief of forgiveness.

SPEAKER_00 (04:15):
What's so fascinating is that the physical
shift doesn't require you to,you know, suddenly feel okay
with what happened.
Really?
The brain starts changing withjust the willingness to consider
it, just the decision to stopdedicating all your energy to
fueling the resentment.

SPEAKER_01 (04:31):
So just the intention is enough to start the
process.

SPEAKER_00 (04:33):
That choice begins to deactivate the stress
response.
The system starts to shift fromthat constant survival mode back
into regulation.

SPEAKER_01 (04:41):
And you can see this happen in the body.

SPEAKER_00 (04:43):
Almost immediately.

SPEAKER_01 (04:52):
The vagus nerve.
That's the master regulator,isn't it?

SPEAKER_00 (04:54):
Think of it as the main brake pedal for your
nervous system.
It runs from your brainstem downto your major organs, and its
whole job is to communicatesafety and calm.

SPEAKER_01 (05:03):
And when it's engaged?

SPEAKER_00 (05:05):
It promotes a rapid recovery from stress.
It brings your body back tobalance.

SPEAKER_01 (05:10):
And this connects to heart rate variability, HRV,
which is a big concept here.

SPEAKER_00 (05:14):
HRV is absolutely critical.
It measures the tiny naturalvariations in time between your
heartbeats.
High variability is a sign ofresilience and flexibility.

SPEAKER_01 (05:23):
And low HRV.

SPEAKER_00 (05:25):
That's associated with chronic stress, rigidity.
So when a forgiveness practiceimproves your HRV, it's
literally showing that you areincreasing your capacity to
handle stress without flyinginto panic mode.

SPEAKER_01 (05:36):
So let's boil this down.
If someone says, I can'tforgive, that lets them off the
hook.
What the biology is actuallytelling us is that forgiveness
isn't for them.

SPEAKER_00 (05:45):
Precisely.
It's not a moral judgment, it'sbiological self-preservation.
You are freeing yourself fromthe physiological burden.

SPEAKER_01 (05:52):
You're reclaiming all that energy.

SPEAKER_00 (05:54):
You're reclaiming massive metabolic and cognitive
resources.
It's not about forgetting, it'sabout choosing not to let the
past dictate your presentneurochemistry.

SPEAKER_01 (06:03):
That shift brings us to the ultimate state of
expansion.
Gratitude.

SPEAKER_00 (06:15):
It is the direct opposition.
Our sources highlight that agratitude practice creates the
precise opposite effect ofchronic negativity.
It's an incredibly powerfulexpansive force.

SPEAKER_01 (06:26):
And what's happening in the brain when we do this?
It seems so simple, just a dailyhabit.

SPEAKER_00 (06:30):
You're directly stimulating your brain's reward
system.
A gratitude practice gives you asignificant boost in both
dopamine and serotonin.

SPEAKER_01 (06:37):
The brain's a natural feel-good chemical.

SPEAKER_00 (06:39):
Exactly.
Dopamine makes you want torepeat the behavior, and
serotonin lifts your mood.
You're basically self-medicatingwith happiness.

SPEAKER_01 (06:46):
And I'm guessing this helps turn that
all-important PFC, the CEO, backon.

SPEAKER_00 (06:51):
Absolutely.
Gratitude drives brain activityright toward the PFC.
It demands thoughtfulreflection, which strengthens
your capacity for wisdom andself-regulation.
You're training your brain toseek perspective over impulse.

SPEAKER_01 (07:03):
And it must turn down the volume on the amygdala,
on that threat detector.

SPEAKER_00 (07:07):
It does.
It's a profound contrast tohatred.
Regular gratitude actuallyreduces the baseline activation
in the amygdala.

SPEAKER_01 (07:15):
So the world literally looks less
threatening.

SPEAKER_00 (07:18):
Your brain starts to interpret ambiguous situations
with less suspicion and morepossibility.
You are training your brain todefault to a state of safety.

SPEAKER_01 (07:27):
The list of benefits better sleep, lower
inflammation, resilience.
It sounds like an incrediblereturn on investment for such a
simple practice.

SPEAKER_00 (07:35):
It is.
The effects are measurable andthey're significant.
And what's so compelling is thatthis is one of the most powerful
neurochemical tools we have, andit it costs nothing.
It just requires a little bit ofyour attention.

SPEAKER_01 (07:46):
So this whole deep dive really boils down to one
idea.
Emotions aren't just feelings,they are instructions.

SPEAKER_00 (07:52):
They are powerful biological commands you give to
your body.

SPEAKER_01 (07:56):
Hatred is a command to contract, to drain your
energy.

SPEAKER_00 (07:58):
And gratitude is a command to expand, to feel safe,
to restore that energy.
Every thought you choose torehearse is literally building
the person you are becoming.

SPEAKER_01 (08:08):
So the researchers gave a really concrete,
actionable step for you, thelistener, to actually test this
out.

SPEAKER_00 (08:14):
Yes.
We want to encourage you to trya specific seven-day practice.
Each evening, just write downone thing you are genuinely
grateful for.

SPEAKER_01 (08:22):
And it doesn't have to be big, right?

SPEAKER_00 (08:24):
No, not at all.
Something real.
The taste of your morningcoffee, a moment of quiet.
A kind word, someone said, adeep breath.

SPEAKER_01 (08:33):
Just do that for seven days and pay really close
attention.
See if you can feel thatinternal shift from contraction
toward expansion.

SPEAKER_00 (08:41):
Because when you choose that one simple thought
of gratitude, you are sending apowerful signal to your entire
nervous system.
You're telling your brain I amsafe enough to open.

SPEAKER_01 (08:49):
The brain becomes what the heart practices.
Think about the power of yourinternal practice this week.