April 15, 2025 • 27 mins
Laurie Namey shares how prioritizing people first in educational leadership leads to transformative school cultures and student achievement. Her leadership philosophy centers on a minimalist principle, proving that when people are valued first, everything else falls into place.
• Prioritize people by day, paperwork by night
• The physical environment communicates value – students deserve clean, well-maintained spaces
• Create non-negotiable routines that center on student interactions
• Personalized communication matters – handwritten notes have profound impact
• Allow space for vulnerability in leadership when facing challenges
• In crisis moments, focus solely on what's best for students
• Core values and clear purpose help maintain balance during difficult situations
• Hard work, consistent routines, and putting people first are foundation for success
Remember what's at the heart of our work – taking care of children first, everything else second.
Buy The Minimalist Teacher book from ASCD+ISTE.
Follow on Instagram @PlanZEducation and @minimalist_ed_podcast.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:19):
Welcome to the Minimalist Educator Podcast, a
podcast about paring down torefocus on the purpose and
priorities in our roles withco-hosts and co-authors of the
Minimalist Teacher Book, TammyMusialski-Borneman and Christine
Arnold.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
In today's episode we speak with Laurie Namy.
Her Pair Down Pointer tells usto focus on people by day and
paperwork by night.
Dr Laurie Namy proudly servesas the Director of Middle
School's Howard County PublicSchool System and is the former
principal of a community middleschool in Jumper, maryland.
She also served half of countypublic schools as the Supervisor
(00:59):
of Equity and CulturalProficiency.
Namy also is an instructor ofGoucher College in Baltimore.
Laurie is a member of the ASCDEmerging Leader Class of 2014.
She has presented on multipleeducational topics on the state
and national levels.
She completed her doctoralprogram in Urban Education
Leadership at Morgan StateUniversity and State University.
Speaker 3 (01:31):
Hello everyone and welcome to today's episode of
the Minimalist Educator Podcast.
Today, christine and I aretalking with Lori Namey from the
Baltimore area, who is what Iwould consider a powerhouse
school leader, and so we aregoing to chat today about
primarily leading with love, butof course, we're going to see
where our conversation goes.
Welcome to the show, lori.
Speaker 4 (01:53):
Thank you so much, so glad to be here.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
How is it going for you today?
Speaker 4 (01:59):
It's great, it's snow day and on the East Coast here
we didn't get much snow, butenough to cancel school in the
surrounding areas andsurrounding counties.
So I'm enjoying the snow daybut, like I just shared, it is
February and I still have myChristmas tree up, so that's
going to be the task after ourconversation today.
Speaker 3 (02:19):
All good, all good.
How are you today?
Speaker 2 (02:21):
Christine, I'm fantastic.
How are you, tammy, doingpretty well.
Speaker 3 (02:25):
I'm fantastic.
How are you, tammy, doing?
Pretty well.
I'm happy to be talking withanother amazing educational
leader such as Laurie.
Laurie and I have known eachother for like 10 and 11 years
now almost both the Leaders,same class and I feel like we've
(02:46):
found each other in differentplaces, where we would often see
each other at conferences andhang out there and I've really
learned to.
I loved watching your postswhen you were a principal and
working with your students andwith a deep focus on that
connection to students as peopleand leading with love.
(03:08):
So can you kind of, like youknow, give us a little bit of
your backstory, lori, on how youkind of knew that that was the
direction you had to go whenworking with students?
Speaker 4 (03:19):
Sure.
So this is my 25th year as aneducator.
I can't believe I'm saying thatout loud.
So this is my 25th year as aneducator?
I can't believe I'm saying thatout loud.
And from the beginning I thinkof time I knew I wanted to help
others and to teach andeventually to lead, and it was
(03:46):
because of the love that Ireceived, I believe, from
educators and family membersthat really modeled that you
should always put people at theforefront of everything that you
do.
So in my journey I've been ateacher, a behavior coach, an
assistant principal.
I was supervisor of equity andcultural proficiency for my
previous school system for manyyears and then I had the amazing
opportunity to become thetransformational principal at
Magnolia Middle School, rightoutside of Baltimore, maryland,
(04:08):
and that has been where I spentthe last five and a half years
of my career, until September ofthis year when I ventured to a
leadership, a system leadershiprole in Howard County, maryland,
on the other side of Baltimore.
So I took the leap of faith thislate in my career, but it's
been an amazing journey and Iknow that being, if I'm
(04:31):
experiencing any kind of success, which I think I am a couple
months in, as director of middleschools for Howard County.
Really, everything that I'mtaking with me has come from the
work that I've done as a schoolleader with me has come from
the work that I've done as aschool leader and so that really
grounds me every day and what Ihope with my 20 principals that
I get to serve and watch leadthat they'll receive love and
(04:55):
support from me in a way thattransfers for them, supporting
their staffs and their childrenwith love too.
Speaker 2 (05:03):
That's awesome.
What a great career to haveexperienced.
I know this might seem like anobvious question, but why do you
think relationships are soimportant when we're talking
about education?
Why isn't it studentachievement?
Why isn't it data results?
Why isn't it innovation and newinitiatives?
Why is it the relationshipsthat are at the core of
(05:26):
everything?
Speaker 4 (05:29):
I think you said that it's an easy question.
I think that's what you said,but I don't think that is an
easy question.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
Just in the context of this group.
It might be a bit obvious, butyou know.
Speaker 4 (05:41):
No, I truly feel that people do more when they feel
supported and they feel lovedand they feel recognized for who
they are as human beings andthat has been my experience
could convince me otherwise thatpeople, when they feel that
(06:05):
you're in the work with them,when they feel that you see the
best in them, they will rise tothe occasion and that eventually
leads to student achievement,to positive culture and climate,
to powerful connections,lifelong connections with
families and the students thatwe get to serve.
(06:26):
So that's really just how I'veapproached things.
It's funny, you know, thinkingabout being here today on the
Minimalist Educator.
I am the queen of do too muchand going overboard.
So it's one of, actually one ofmy friends and colleagues who I
shared with this morning that Iwas doing this podcast and he
(06:46):
said really, you're, how do you?
I mean really, I can't evenpronounce minimalist.
I don't think it's a word thatI use in my capillary, I'm
succinct or anything like.
That is not part of the frame.
But when you think about it,even as as much as I put a lot
of energy and a lot of, I guess,fanfare around the work that we
(07:08):
do as school leaders, it isreally that simple.
It is.
The minimalist thing is thatpeople have to come first in
what we do and everything elsereally falls into place.
Speaker 3 (07:21):
Yeah, and it's funny, right to place.
Yeah, and it's funny right Likethat's why we wanted you to be
on the show is because youreally do still in this current
role and did with your students,when you're working directly
with them, you do have asingular focus and that is them
right Like you're, you'releading with your whole heart
(07:42):
and everybody knows that.
It's easy to see, and I wish Ihad visited your school when
you're still there because Iloved seeing, like all the
things.
Like you say you, you know youyou do all the things for people
, but it really is because ofthis one reason that you just
love them so much.
And so what are some of thethings that you would do and
(08:05):
still continue to do in thisrole?
But you might maybedifferentiate between student
and like colleague and staffmembers, but what are some of
the things that you do thatreally show people how much you
do care for them and how you'reinvesting in the relationship
with people?
Speaker 4 (08:25):
Yeah, yeah, so, um, I think someone once said you
should prioritize people by day,paperwork by night, and so my
philosophy has always beenreally just to keep people at
(08:47):
the center, but also making surethat I was loving out loud.
I never wanted to let myself beoutworked.
I never would ask somebody todo something that I couldn't do
myself.
I wanted people to understandthat I was in the work alongside
of them, and that has, I think,been a transparent way I've led
(09:12):
.
I also think that you couldtell what a school values within
the first five minutes ofwalking through the door, and so
we paid a lot of attention,especially when I first got
there and it continues andcontinues now while I'm not
there is to really pay attentionto the physical plan of the
building.
That communicates love, too,and value.
(09:36):
So if our building is clean, ifthere's pictures of people our
most valuable possession, havingpeople be our prized possession
then they're the ones that weshould see first.
So I had a dynamic they'restill there an amazing custodial
(09:57):
team who had so much pride inour building and they worked so
hard to make sure that ourphysical space was perfect for
our kids each and every day, andit's a 40-year-old building,
but more than that, almost a 50year old building, but it's
still.
It's still shined every day,and that's because our kids
deserved it and our staffdeserved it as well.
(10:19):
The other thing that I would dois I put structures in place
that really prioritize peoplebefore anything else.
750 kids would walk through ourdoors every morning.
I only would allow one door tobe open so that they would all
have to pass me, and I would beable to greet every single child
(10:40):
every morning.
That was a non-negotiable forme.
The other thing that was anon-negotiable for me was that I
didn't schedule any likemeetings unless there was an
urgent matter.
Before 9 am, my priority was tobe in every single classroom
every single day, and if youdon't schedule that out or
prioritize a specific time forit, it doesn't happen, and so
(11:01):
that was really important for metoo.
And then, something that I'velearned, I think, from a mentor
of mine, our formersuperintendent.
I'll call her name.
Her name is Barbara Canavan.
One of the things that shealways did was make the personal
phone call, write the personalnote not the email, you know the
note and just to give peoplethe opportunity to feel
(11:24):
recognized, to feel that humanconnection.
I always still do that, nomatter how labor intensive it is
.
I had a staff of 100 and everyteacher appreciation week I
would write all 100 of them apersonalized note.
That never went away.
And now, you know, in my newrole I serve 66 principals and
(11:45):
assistant principals and for theholiday season I wrote every
single one of them a card,personalized to them, about them
and what I've learned in a veryshort amount of time.
So for some, you know, I didn'tget to write maybe as much as I
would want it to, because I wasjust getting there and really
just trying to get to knoweverybody.
But just the feedback that I gotfrom that was powerful to me.
(12:07):
It's just part of the work andit's part of who I am and it's
what I'm carrying with me fromBarbara and many other leaders
that I've gotten a chance towork with.
But I didn't realize the impact.
People back in Hartford Countythey were used to me, they knew
that that was coming, but forthis new group of individuals
that I get to lead alongsidewith, there was a lot of like
(12:29):
wow, you know.
But hopefully, you know, theylearn from that experience, that
moment too and they're going topass that on to their staffs
and to their kids.
So little things make a hugedifference, and my grandfather
always used to say the greatestgift you could give somebody is
recognition, and I think thatthat is part of leadership as
(12:53):
well.
Speaker 2 (12:55):
Yeah, very true, and I think I'm going to have to
spend some time thinking aboutthat idea of the presentation of
things being a way of showinglove, because I'm personally not
super into aesthetic things.
So I've never really thoughtabout it like that before.
So I think I'm going to go andthink about that a little bit
more.
So thank you for that littlenugget there.
(13:16):
But I'm wondering have you hadthe experience of someone really
switched off and disengaged,like whether it's a staff member
or a parent or a child, and howdo you reach through to them?
How do you get past those bigbarriers and still show them
that they're recognized andappreciated and loved?
Speaker 4 (13:40):
I would love to meet the person that hasn't had a
challenge.
I always feel like if you'renot making somebody upset or
disappointed, you're not pushinghard enough, right, and you
have to be relentless in yourleadership to make sure that
you're unapologetic about whatkids deserve and what we want
for our kids.
So along the way, there'sdefinitely been people that
(14:00):
haven't been thrilled with me,regardless of how much kindness
and love I've shared their way.
I've learned in thosesituations to be very vulnerable
, to allow myself to listen andto learn and understand where
they're coming from.
My default setting is that wehave to assume best intentions
of people and, at the end of theday, regardless of how it shows
(14:24):
up, parents are advocatingstrongly for their children.
You can't ask for more thanthat, right?
They love their child that muchthat they're going to be
emotionally invested Staffmembers.
They are proud of their workand they want to do well, and so
anything that looks likethey're not doing well, they're
(14:44):
going to be emotional about it.
And for kids, especially middleschool students, which is where
I've spent my entire career weknow the dynamics of the 11 to
14 year old brain.
Their emotions are at theforefront, so they're going to
be heightened.
They're going to be reactionary, they're going to question
things that are going to, youknow, push back on things.
(15:06):
That doesn't make them feelgood in the moment, and so part
of our job as leaders, I thinkis is to really try to seek to
understand and then allow themto experience the feelings that
they're feeling.
Listen, give them space to doit.
I used to tell my parents uh, my, my school parents all the time
(15:26):
, not my real mom and dad, but,um, my school parents.
You know, come into my officeand be whoever you need to be in
this moment, and it's a safespace to do it.
So I'm going to protect mystaff, I'm going to protect my
other kids.
Please don't be emotional oraggressive to them.
I just leave that with me.
Do all you need to do, becauseI think it's an honor for you to
(15:49):
be that comfortable with me, tobe able to share your deep,
deep feelings, and so givingthem the space to be able to do
that, I think, is really, really, really important, regardless
of who it is kid, adult, staffmember but, at the same time,
when you could be vulnerable inyour leadership and say I don't
understand your perspectivebecause I've never lived in your
(16:11):
space, in your time, in yourcontext, but this is what, maybe
a connecting experience I'vehad, so I'm understanding it
like making that connection topeople, allowing people to see
that you're a human too andshare with people.
How you're making me feel, youknow, like this is what I want.
This is where I think we couldcome together.
(16:32):
We both want the same thingsfor your child, for our school,
for your professional growth.
If you're talking to a staffmember, but this is what I'm
feeling from your emotion and Ithink also, just, you know,
keeping the main thing, the mainthing and whatever it is, at
the end of the day, that peopleneed to get to that that's what
(16:55):
you keep bringing theconversation back to.
Like.
This might not be your style,my approaches is might be
different, we're thinking alittle bit differently, but at
the end of the day, what areways that we could work together
to be able to get to that sameresult, which is obviously and
most important kids' safety andkids' well-being.
(17:15):
And so, just you know beingvulnerable.
There was times when we, youknow, we've had a turbulent ride
in my school leadership.
I led through COVID.
Like so many other of mycolleagues, I led through COVID,
like so many other of mycolleagues, but also, you know,
we were a school, like I said,we weren't performing as best as
we could on behalf of ourchildren, so we needed to do a
(17:38):
lot of hard work, and therewould be days when I would stand
up in front of my staff and sayI don't know what to do here.
But I know that we know what todo here, and so we're going to
have to come together and figureout what it's going to look
like, because one thing we'renot going to do is give up.
And so, yeah, I think you couldbe simultaneously soft and
strong, and that requires you tobe vulnerable.
(18:01):
In those spaces where you mightnot know all the answers, you
could still be strong and knowthat you're not going to give up
.
But in the same moment, youalso have to say we need one
another to be able to moveforward, problem solve together
and move forward.
Speaker 3 (18:16):
That's such a powerful thing to embody, I
think, and see in action, isthat vulnerability and softness,
but knowing like we're stilldoing this together, like
regardless of the circumstances,we have to figure this out.
Knowing like we're still doingthis together, like regardless
of the circumstances, we have tofigure this out.
And so how did you then,because you pour your whole self
(18:37):
into this how do you protectyourself in such emotional
emotionality, because it's verydraining?
You had an open door to parents, and so how do you?
How did you and how do youmaneuver, like protecting your
own emotions and your and yoursanity in some cases?
(19:00):
Right, because that's a lot totake on from other people.
Speaker 4 (19:05):
Yeah, I think I'm still.
I'm still a work in progress inthis tan.
There's part of me where I feellike I'm strong all the time
and I got this, but then there'smoments where you're you have
to, you question yourself andyou say you know, am I doing the
right thing in the right moment?
(19:26):
And for me, I lean on twothings my core values and my
faith.
And so my core values you know,once we've probably all done,
you know, like the leadership Ican't really remember the name
of it right now Gallup, yeah,gallup.
And StrengthsFinder and yep,one of my core my first core
(19:50):
value is belief, and it reallytalks about how belief if that
is your first core value, youdon't stray from what you
believe to be rights and whatyour mission is.
And because of that, honestly,I think that's how I've been
able to stay strong in crisisand in times that are rough.
(20:12):
I know that I have thisenormous responsibility of
taking care of all these peopleand so I need to be my best self
in this moment in time.
And it's because I believe whatI'm doing is right and we're
taking care of kids, which isultimately the top priority On
my last day as principal ofMagnolia Tammy.
I know you know this story,christine, I know you might not.
(20:34):
There was a shooting at ourfeeder high school and one of my
former students, warren Grant,unfortunately lost his life that
day, on my very last day ofschool leadership, on my very
last day of school leadership.
And the school is led by anamazing principal, one of my
(21:04):
close friends.
And so the emotions that I hadto carry that day, not really
knowing what's going on at thatpoint in time, having to lead my
school in a lockdown withstudents and staff that are
extremely connected to thecommunity and to all of our
former students at JoppatownHigh School.
Then also, you know, worryingfor myself selfishly.
The kids love dearly, my staffmembers there that I love dearly
(21:24):
.
Are they okay?
What's going on?
And then also just the fielddearly.
Are they okay?
What's going on?
And then also just the field,the moving parts of.
Are we on lockdown?
What do we need to do?
What steps do we need to take?
Is my building safe?
Are my parents feeling thatthis thing is safe?
Are parents going to come runup all the different dynamics?
(21:46):
And that day, you know, I thinkabout it often because of how
many things we had to manage inthe moment and how many
decisions we had to make on thefly, and that was we did a
shooting in our school, but howimpactful it was in that moment
in time.
So I can't even imagine whatMelissa was experiencing the
worst, the worst nightmare thatyou could, you could imagine, as
(22:07):
a principal for sure, you know.
That day, about a half hourinto our lockdown, nearly a
dozen high schoolers showed upon our front steps, again, far
walk from the high school, butthey came to us, they came to
their middle school, and so wewheeled out a cart of water and
(22:31):
I sat on the curb with thembecause I really felt you know
what else do you do in thatmoment?
And you process, and we stillweren't sure what was happening
officially.
(22:53):
That day, I think, reminded methat our purpose, no matter how
many, what stakes, what thestate assessments ask of us,
what anyone expects out ofpublic school, the first and
only thing is taking care ofchildren.
And so, even as a director ofmiddle school now, what I tell
my principals all the time, youknow, the only decision that we
should ever be asking ourselves,regardless of the dynamics of
(23:16):
the day or the emergency at handis what is the best thing for
the kids in the moment, and thatseems so cliche, but it's
moments of tragedy and chaosthat remind us that always has
to be the only decision that wemake each day yeah that's so
(23:39):
powerful.
Speaker 3 (23:39):
But yes to go back.
Speaker 4 (23:40):
I know that was kind of like a full circle, but it's
being reminded of your purposeis how I kept myself grounded.
Reminded of your purpose is ishow I kept myself grounded.
Um, knowing that this is I needto continue to work hard every
single day to make sure thatkids are okay.
Um, figuratively, emotionally,physically, all of the things,
(24:07):
um, and so, just reminding youknow yourself with purpose and
then also, you know, justallowing yourself to take a
moment to breathe and taking aminute just to come back and go
to the core.
But it takes some structure tothat.
I always felt better when I hadroutines and procedures and
(24:31):
practices in place and when I'mthrown off my routine, like when
there was days where I wasn'table to be at the front door for
whatever reason, or I wasn'table to make it to the classroom
, that's when I felt like I wasoff.
So, getting back to the basics,getting back to the routines,
taking a minute, always groundedourselves in what's important.
Speaker 3 (24:56):
Everything else is kind of falls in a line when
those things are in place.
It's funny that you mentionedthat, because we need to wrap up
the show here and we always askour guests for a pare down
pointer and maybe that's itright.
Like you got routines, thingswill fall into place.
Is there anything else you wantto add to that or or bring up
as a paradigm pointer for ourlisteners?
Speaker 4 (25:17):
Yeah, I think it's.
It's a couple of things Imentioned that people by day,
paperwork by night yeah, it'sgoing to require you to work
harder.
You know it's going to be.
There's no substitute for hardwork or and being relentless and
getting to success.
And so hard work, routines,practices and prioritizing
(25:39):
people yeah, those are the bigthings.
Speaker 3 (25:44):
Yeah, thank you so much for for chatting with us
today, laurie, and sharing thestory, too, about the events at
your school on your last day.
I think that's really impactfuland helps us remember.
You know, we really want thesame thing for kids and that's
to be safe and well, and sothank you for sharing that with
(26:04):
us and chatting with us today.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
Thank you both very much us and chatting with us
today.
Thank you both very much.
Today's episode was brought toyou by Plan Z Professional
Learning Servicesforward-thinking educator
support.
Speaker 1 (26:23):
Find out more at planzplservicescom.
Be sure to join Tammy andChristine and guests for more
episodes of the MinimalistEducator Podcast.
They would love to hear aboutyour journey with minimalism.
Connect with them at PlanZPLSon Twitter or Instagram.
The music for the podcast hasbeen written and performed by
Gaia Moretti.
Thank you.
Welcome to the Minimalist Educator Podcast, a
podcast about paring down torefocus on the purpose and
priorities in our roles withco-hosts and co-authors of the
Minimalist Teacher Book, TammyMusialski-Borneman and Christine
Arnold.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
In today's episode we speak with Laurie Namy.
Her Pair Down Pointer tells usto focus on people by day and
paperwork by night.
Dr Laurie Namy proudly servesas the Director of Middle
School's Howard County PublicSchool System and is the former
principal of a community middleschool in Jumper, maryland.
She also served half of countypublic schools as the Supervisor
(00:59):
of Equity and CulturalProficiency.
Namy also is an instructor ofGoucher College in Baltimore.
Laurie is a member of the ASCDEmerging Leader Class of 2014.
She has presented on multipleeducational topics on the state
and national levels.
She completed her doctoralprogram in Urban Education
Leadership at Morgan StateUniversity and State University.
Speaker 3 (01:31):
Hello everyone and welcome to today's episode of
the Minimalist Educator Podcast.
Today, christine and I aretalking with Lori Namey from the
Baltimore area, who is what Iwould consider a powerhouse
school leader, and so we aregoing to chat today about
primarily leading with love, butof course, we're going to see
where our conversation goes.
Welcome to the show, lori.
Speaker 4 (01:53):
Thank you so much, so glad to be here.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
How is it going for you today?
Speaker 4 (01:59):
It's great, it's snow day and on the East Coast here
we didn't get much snow, butenough to cancel school in the
surrounding areas andsurrounding counties.
So I'm enjoying the snow daybut, like I just shared, it is
February and I still have myChristmas tree up, so that's
going to be the task after ourconversation today.
Speaker 3 (02:19):
All good, all good.
How are you today?
Speaker 2 (02:21):
Christine, I'm fantastic.
How are you, tammy, doingpretty well.
Speaker 3 (02:25):
I'm fantastic.
How are you, tammy, doing?
Pretty well.
I'm happy to be talking withanother amazing educational
leader such as Laurie.
Laurie and I have known eachother for like 10 and 11 years
now almost both the Leaders,same class and I feel like we've
(02:46):
found each other in differentplaces, where we would often see
each other at conferences andhang out there and I've really
learned to.
I loved watching your postswhen you were a principal and
working with your students andwith a deep focus on that
connection to students as peopleand leading with love.
(03:08):
So can you kind of, like youknow, give us a little bit of
your backstory, lori, on how youkind of knew that that was the
direction you had to go whenworking with students?
Speaker 4 (03:19):
Sure.
So this is my 25th year as aneducator.
I can't believe I'm saying thatout loud.
So this is my 25th year as aneducator?
I can't believe I'm saying thatout loud.
And from the beginning I thinkof time I knew I wanted to help
others and to teach andeventually to lead, and it was
(03:46):
because of the love that Ireceived, I believe, from
educators and family membersthat really modeled that you
should always put people at theforefront of everything that you
do.
So in my journey I've been ateacher, a behavior coach, an
assistant principal.
I was supervisor of equity andcultural proficiency for my
previous school system for manyyears and then I had the amazing
opportunity to become thetransformational principal at
Magnolia Middle School, rightoutside of Baltimore, maryland,
(04:08):
and that has been where I spentthe last five and a half years
of my career, until September ofthis year when I ventured to a
leadership, a system leadershiprole in Howard County, maryland,
on the other side of Baltimore.
So I took the leap of faith thislate in my career, but it's
been an amazing journey and Iknow that being, if I'm
(04:31):
experiencing any kind of success, which I think I am a couple
months in, as director of middleschools for Howard County.
Really, everything that I'mtaking with me has come from the
work that I've done as a schoolleader with me has come from
the work that I've done as aschool leader and so that really
grounds me every day and what Ihope with my 20 principals that
I get to serve and watch leadthat they'll receive love and
(04:55):
support from me in a way thattransfers for them, supporting
their staffs and their childrenwith love too.
Speaker 2 (05:03):
That's awesome.
What a great career to haveexperienced.
I know this might seem like anobvious question, but why do you
think relationships are soimportant when we're talking
about education?
Why isn't it studentachievement?
Why isn't it data results?
Why isn't it innovation and newinitiatives?
Why is it the relationshipsthat are at the core of
(05:26):
everything?
Speaker 4 (05:29):
I think you said that it's an easy question.
I think that's what you said,but I don't think that is an
easy question.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
Just in the context of this group.
It might be a bit obvious, butyou know.
Speaker 4 (05:41):
No, I truly feel that people do more when they feel
supported and they feel lovedand they feel recognized for who
they are as human beings andthat has been my experience
could convince me otherwise thatpeople, when they feel that
(06:05):
you're in the work with them,when they feel that you see the
best in them, they will rise tothe occasion and that eventually
leads to student achievement,to positive culture and climate,
to powerful connections,lifelong connections with
families and the students thatwe get to serve.
(06:26):
So that's really just how I'veapproached things.
It's funny, you know, thinkingabout being here today on the
Minimalist Educator.
I am the queen of do too muchand going overboard.
So it's one of, actually one ofmy friends and colleagues who I
shared with this morning that Iwas doing this podcast and he
(06:46):
said really, you're, how do you?
I mean really, I can't evenpronounce minimalist.
I don't think it's a word thatI use in my capillary, I'm
succinct or anything like.
That is not part of the frame.
But when you think about it,even as as much as I put a lot
of energy and a lot of, I guess,fanfare around the work that we
(07:08):
do as school leaders, it isreally that simple.
It is.
The minimalist thing is thatpeople have to come first in
what we do and everything elsereally falls into place.
Speaker 3 (07:21):
Yeah, and it's funny, right to place.
Yeah, and it's funny right Likethat's why we wanted you to be
on the show is because youreally do still in this current
role and did with your students,when you're working directly
with them, you do have asingular focus and that is them
right Like you're, you'releading with your whole heart
(07:42):
and everybody knows that.
It's easy to see, and I wish Ihad visited your school when
you're still there because Iloved seeing, like all the
things.
Like you say you, you know youyou do all the things for people
, but it really is because ofthis one reason that you just
love them so much.
And so what are some of thethings that you would do and
(08:05):
still continue to do in thisrole?
But you might maybedifferentiate between student
and like colleague and staffmembers, but what are some of
the things that you do thatreally show people how much you
do care for them and how you'reinvesting in the relationship
with people?
Speaker 4 (08:25):
Yeah, yeah, so, um, I think someone once said you
should prioritize people by day,paperwork by night, and so my
philosophy has always beenreally just to keep people at
(08:47):
the center, but also making surethat I was loving out loud.
I never wanted to let myself beoutworked.
I never would ask somebody todo something that I couldn't do
myself.
I wanted people to understandthat I was in the work alongside
of them, and that has, I think,been a transparent way I've led
(09:12):
.
I also think that you couldtell what a school values within
the first five minutes ofwalking through the door, and so
we paid a lot of attention,especially when I first got
there and it continues andcontinues now while I'm not
there is to really pay attentionto the physical plan of the
building.
That communicates love, too,and value.
(09:36):
So if our building is clean, ifthere's pictures of people our
most valuable possession, havingpeople be our prized possession
then they're the ones that weshould see first.
So I had a dynamic they'restill there an amazing custodial
(09:57):
team who had so much pride inour building and they worked so
hard to make sure that ourphysical space was perfect for
our kids each and every day, andit's a 40-year-old building,
but more than that, almost a 50year old building, but it's
still.
It's still shined every day,and that's because our kids
deserved it and our staffdeserved it as well.
(10:19):
The other thing that I would dois I put structures in place
that really prioritize peoplebefore anything else.
750 kids would walk through ourdoors every morning.
I only would allow one door tobe open so that they would all
have to pass me, and I would beable to greet every single child
(10:40):
every morning.
That was a non-negotiable forme.
The other thing that was anon-negotiable for me was that I
didn't schedule any likemeetings unless there was an
urgent matter.
Before 9 am, my priority was tobe in every single classroom
every single day, and if youdon't schedule that out or
prioritize a specific time forit, it doesn't happen, and so
(11:01):
that was really important for metoo.
And then, something that I'velearned, I think, from a mentor
of mine, our formersuperintendent.
I'll call her name.
Her name is Barbara Canavan.
One of the things that shealways did was make the personal
phone call, write the personalnote not the email, you know the
note and just to give peoplethe opportunity to feel
(11:24):
recognized, to feel that humanconnection.
I always still do that, nomatter how labor intensive it is
.
I had a staff of 100 and everyteacher appreciation week I
would write all 100 of them apersonalized note.
That never went away.
And now, you know, in my newrole I serve 66 principals and
(11:45):
assistant principals and for theholiday season I wrote every
single one of them a card,personalized to them, about them
and what I've learned in a veryshort amount of time.
So for some, you know, I didn'tget to write maybe as much as I
would want it to, because I wasjust getting there and really
just trying to get to knoweverybody.
But just the feedback that I gotfrom that was powerful to me.
(12:07):
It's just part of the work andit's part of who I am and it's
what I'm carrying with me fromBarbara and many other leaders
that I've gotten a chance towork with.
But I didn't realize the impact.
People back in Hartford Countythey were used to me, they knew
that that was coming, but forthis new group of individuals
that I get to lead alongsidewith, there was a lot of like
(12:29):
wow, you know.
But hopefully, you know, theylearn from that experience, that
moment too and they're going topass that on to their staffs
and to their kids.
So little things make a hugedifference, and my grandfather
always used to say the greatestgift you could give somebody is
recognition, and I think thatthat is part of leadership as
(12:53):
well.
Speaker 2 (12:55):
Yeah, very true, and I think I'm going to have to
spend some time thinking aboutthat idea of the presentation of
things being a way of showinglove, because I'm personally not
super into aesthetic things.
So I've never really thoughtabout it like that before.
So I think I'm going to go andthink about that a little bit
more.
So thank you for that littlenugget there.
(13:16):
But I'm wondering have you hadthe experience of someone really
switched off and disengaged,like whether it's a staff member
or a parent or a child, and howdo you reach through to them?
How do you get past those bigbarriers and still show them
that they're recognized andappreciated and loved?
Speaker 4 (13:40):
I would love to meet the person that hasn't had a
challenge.
I always feel like if you'renot making somebody upset or
disappointed, you're not pushinghard enough, right, and you
have to be relentless in yourleadership to make sure that
you're unapologetic about whatkids deserve and what we want
for our kids.
So along the way, there'sdefinitely been people that
(14:00):
haven't been thrilled with me,regardless of how much kindness
and love I've shared their way.
I've learned in thosesituations to be very vulnerable
, to allow myself to listen andto learn and understand where
they're coming from.
My default setting is that wehave to assume best intentions
of people and, at the end of theday, regardless of how it shows
(14:24):
up, parents are advocatingstrongly for their children.
You can't ask for more thanthat, right?
They love their child that muchthat they're going to be
emotionally invested Staffmembers.
They are proud of their workand they want to do well, and so
anything that looks likethey're not doing well, they're
(14:44):
going to be emotional about it.
And for kids, especially middleschool students, which is where
I've spent my entire career weknow the dynamics of the 11 to
14 year old brain.
Their emotions are at theforefront, so they're going to
be heightened.
They're going to be reactionary, they're going to question
things that are going to, youknow, push back on things.
(15:06):
That doesn't make them feelgood in the moment, and so part
of our job as leaders, I thinkis is to really try to seek to
understand and then allow themto experience the feelings that
they're feeling.
Listen, give them space to doit.
I used to tell my parents uh, my, my school parents all the time
(15:26):
, not my real mom and dad, but,um, my school parents.
You know, come into my officeand be whoever you need to be in
this moment, and it's a safespace to do it.
So I'm going to protect mystaff, I'm going to protect my
other kids.
Please don't be emotional oraggressive to them.
I just leave that with me.
Do all you need to do, becauseI think it's an honor for you to
(15:49):
be that comfortable with me, tobe able to share your deep,
deep feelings, and so givingthem the space to be able to do
that, I think, is really, really, really important, regardless
of who it is kid, adult, staffmember but, at the same time,
when you could be vulnerable inyour leadership and say I don't
understand your perspectivebecause I've never lived in your
(16:11):
space, in your time, in yourcontext, but this is what, maybe
a connecting experience I'vehad, so I'm understanding it
like making that connection topeople, allowing people to see
that you're a human too andshare with people.
How you're making me feel, youknow, like this is what I want.
This is where I think we couldcome together.
(16:32):
We both want the same thingsfor your child, for our school,
for your professional growth.
If you're talking to a staffmember, but this is what I'm
feeling from your emotion and Ithink also, just, you know,
keeping the main thing, the mainthing and whatever it is, at
the end of the day, that peopleneed to get to that that's what
(16:55):
you keep bringing theconversation back to.
Like.
This might not be your style,my approaches is might be
different, we're thinking alittle bit differently, but at
the end of the day, what areways that we could work together
to be able to get to that sameresult, which is obviously and
most important kids' safety andkids' well-being.
(17:15):
And so, just you know beingvulnerable.
There was times when we, youknow, we've had a turbulent ride
in my school leadership.
I led through COVID.
Like so many other of mycolleagues, I led through COVID,
like so many other of mycolleagues, but also, you know,
we were a school, like I said,we weren't performing as best as
we could on behalf of ourchildren, so we needed to do a
(17:38):
lot of hard work, and therewould be days when I would stand
up in front of my staff and sayI don't know what to do here.
But I know that we know what todo here, and so we're going to
have to come together and figureout what it's going to look
like, because one thing we'renot going to do is give up.
And so, yeah, I think you couldbe simultaneously soft and
strong, and that requires you tobe vulnerable.
(18:01):
In those spaces where you mightnot know all the answers, you
could still be strong and knowthat you're not going to give up
.
But in the same moment, youalso have to say we need one
another to be able to moveforward, problem solve together
and move forward.
Speaker 3 (18:16):
That's such a powerful thing to embody, I
think, and see in action, isthat vulnerability and softness,
but knowing like we're stilldoing this together, like
regardless of the circumstances,we have to figure this out.
Knowing like we're still doingthis together, like regardless
of the circumstances, we have tofigure this out.
And so how did you then,because you pour your whole self
(18:37):
into this how do you protectyourself in such emotional
emotionality, because it's verydraining?
You had an open door to parents, and so how do you?
How did you and how do youmaneuver, like protecting your
own emotions and your and yoursanity in some cases?
(19:00):
Right, because that's a lot totake on from other people.
Speaker 4 (19:05):
Yeah, I think I'm still.
I'm still a work in progress inthis tan.
There's part of me where I feellike I'm strong all the time
and I got this, but then there'smoments where you're you have
to, you question yourself andyou say you know, am I doing the
right thing in the right moment?
(19:26):
And for me, I lean on twothings my core values and my
faith.
And so my core values you know,once we've probably all done,
you know, like the leadership Ican't really remember the name
of it right now Gallup, yeah,gallup.
And StrengthsFinder and yep,one of my core my first core
(19:50):
value is belief, and it reallytalks about how belief if that
is your first core value, youdon't stray from what you
believe to be rights and whatyour mission is.
And because of that, honestly,I think that's how I've been
able to stay strong in crisisand in times that are rough.
(20:12):
I know that I have thisenormous responsibility of
taking care of all these peopleand so I need to be my best self
in this moment in time.
And it's because I believe whatI'm doing is right and we're
taking care of kids, which isultimately the top priority On
my last day as principal ofMagnolia Tammy.
I know you know this story,christine, I know you might not.
(20:34):
There was a shooting at ourfeeder high school and one of my
former students, warren Grant,unfortunately lost his life that
day, on my very last day ofschool leadership, on my very
last day of school leadership.
And the school is led by anamazing principal, one of my
(21:04):
close friends.
And so the emotions that I hadto carry that day, not really
knowing what's going on at thatpoint in time, having to lead my
school in a lockdown withstudents and staff that are
extremely connected to thecommunity and to all of our
former students at JoppatownHigh School.
Then also, you know, worryingfor myself selfishly.
The kids love dearly, my staffmembers there that I love dearly
(21:24):
.
Are they okay?
What's going on?
And then also just the fielddearly.
Are they okay?
What's going on?
And then also just the field,the moving parts of.
Are we on lockdown?
What do we need to do?
What steps do we need to take?
Is my building safe?
Are my parents feeling thatthis thing is safe?
Are parents going to come runup all the different dynamics?
(21:46):
And that day, you know, I thinkabout it often because of how
many things we had to manage inthe moment and how many
decisions we had to make on thefly, and that was we did a
shooting in our school, but howimpactful it was in that moment
in time.
So I can't even imagine whatMelissa was experiencing the
worst, the worst nightmare thatyou could, you could imagine, as
(22:07):
a principal for sure, you know.
That day, about a half hourinto our lockdown, nearly a
dozen high schoolers showed upon our front steps, again, far
walk from the high school, butthey came to us, they came to
their middle school, and so wewheeled out a cart of water and
(22:31):
I sat on the curb with thembecause I really felt you know
what else do you do in thatmoment?
And you process, and we stillweren't sure what was happening
officially.
(22:53):
That day, I think, reminded methat our purpose, no matter how
many, what stakes, what thestate assessments ask of us,
what anyone expects out ofpublic school, the first and
only thing is taking care ofchildren.
And so, even as a director ofmiddle school now, what I tell
my principals all the time, youknow, the only decision that we
should ever be asking ourselves,regardless of the dynamics of
(23:16):
the day or the emergency at handis what is the best thing for
the kids in the moment, and thatseems so cliche, but it's
moments of tragedy and chaosthat remind us that always has
to be the only decision that wemake each day yeah that's so
(23:39):
powerful.
Speaker 3 (23:39):
But yes to go back.
Speaker 4 (23:40):
I know that was kind of like a full circle, but it's
being reminded of your purposeis how I kept myself grounded.
Reminded of your purpose is ishow I kept myself grounded.
Um, knowing that this is I needto continue to work hard every
single day to make sure thatkids are okay.
Um, figuratively, emotionally,physically, all of the things,
(24:07):
um, and so, just reminding youknow yourself with purpose and
then also, you know, justallowing yourself to take a
moment to breathe and taking aminute just to come back and go
to the core.
But it takes some structure tothat.
I always felt better when I hadroutines and procedures and
(24:31):
practices in place and when I'mthrown off my routine, like when
there was days where I wasn'table to be at the front door for
whatever reason, or I wasn'table to make it to the classroom
, that's when I felt like I wasoff.
So, getting back to the basics,getting back to the routines,
taking a minute, always groundedourselves in what's important.
Speaker 3 (24:56):
Everything else is kind of falls in a line when
those things are in place.
It's funny that you mentionedthat, because we need to wrap up
the show here and we always askour guests for a pare down
pointer and maybe that's itright.
Like you got routines, thingswill fall into place.
Is there anything else you wantto add to that or or bring up
as a paradigm pointer for ourlisteners?
Speaker 4 (25:17):
Yeah, I think it's.
It's a couple of things Imentioned that people by day,
paperwork by night yeah, it'sgoing to require you to work
harder.
You know it's going to be.
There's no substitute for hardwork or and being relentless and
getting to success.
And so hard work, routines,practices and prioritizing
(25:39):
people yeah, those are the bigthings.
Speaker 3 (25:44):
Yeah, thank you so much for for chatting with us
today, laurie, and sharing thestory, too, about the events at
your school on your last day.
I think that's really impactfuland helps us remember.
You know, we really want thesame thing for kids and that's
to be safe and well, and sothank you for sharing that with
(26:04):
us and chatting with us today.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
Thank you both very much us and chatting with us
today.
Thank you both very much.
Today's episode was brought toyou by Plan Z Professional
Learning Servicesforward-thinking educator
support.
Speaker 1 (26:23):
Find out more at planzplservicescom.
Be sure to join Tammy andChristine and guests for more
episodes of the MinimalistEducator Podcast.
They would love to hear aboutyour journey with minimalism.
Connect with them at PlanZPLSon Twitter or Instagram.
The music for the podcast hasbeen written and performed by
Gaia Moretti.
Thank you.
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