S2 E7 with Ana-Kay from Pickneys at Play all about Montessori with twins

Something I get asked a lot about is how to do Montessori with twins. I loved this conversation with Ana-Kay of Pickneys at Play who shared with us everything from eating and toileting with two, when they copy each other doing something that's not safe, some travelling tips and how they incorporated their religion and Jamaican culture into their home.

Links from the show

• Pickneys at Play - Instagram
• From Childhood to Adolescence, by Dr Montessori
• stand up diaper change
• language matching activity
• giving them access in the kitchen
• dressing area
• travel tips
• DIY oversized object permanence box
• DIY chalkboard
• DIY placemat
• books from and about the Caribbean

This week's listener question

"Hi Simone, My daughter (recently turned 2) is really into counting at the moment. She had a beautiful abacus that she uses all the time. She, of course, gets the order wrong most of the time en generally counts one.. two.. eight, nine, ten! I want to help her slowly get the hang of it, but don’t want to say “no, you’re doing it wrong, counting goes like this”. I try to do this by counting out loud when possible (for example the coops of coffee when she helps making coffee or the number of tomatoes for dinner). But I’m an insecure about how I can help her best when she is counting for herself. Should I just leave her to it, correct her and, for example, count together, or what would be the ‘Montessori way’ to help her? Love to have your take on this!" - Eva

Episode Transcript

Unknown (00:11):
Hi everyone, Simone here again and welcome to The
Montessori Notebook podcast. Canyou believe it? We are already
up to Episode Seven of seasontwo. That means that we're
already halfway. And thank youall for the lovely feedback and
reviews. And yes, there are suchamazing people in our Montessori
community to talk with and howthey all bring Montessori into
their lives in their unique way.
And today's conversation isabsolutely no exception. I love

(00:34):
following Ana-Kay of Pickneys atPlay on Instagram with her
lovely twin boys, Jaax and Juju.
And I got to know them a littlebetter during the online
Montessori retreat that I ran atthe end of last year. And then
when I started digging in doingsome research for the podcast, I
couldn't believe that Ana-Kayhasn't known about Montessori

(00:54):
for so long. So it's going to besuper inspiring, if you are
wondering if it's too late foryou to get started. And I always
say it's never too early, andit's never too late. And all of
you are going to be inspired byhow they apply Montessori with
their twins, as well as justAna-Kay's infectious enthusiasm.
And it was such a funconversation. So but before we

(01:15):
get to that, today, I wanted toshare with you a little bit
about the adolescence trainingthat I just finished yesterday.
It was a 30 hour introduction tothe Montessori program with
Jenny Marie Hoglund in Sweden,which is being held online via
the MMI, which is the MariaMontessori Institute in London.

(01:35):
And that's one of the goodthings that has come out of
COVID was being able to followthese trainings online when it's
more difficult to be able to getto these trainings, usually. And
it was lovely to get to hearfrom some of the adolescents in
their program from a school inNorway who are setting up a farm
school and just the wealth ofknowledge and experience that

(01:58):
Jenny has. She's been workingwith adolescents, I think since
ages. So I've always known a bitabout Dr. Montessori, his ideas
for adolescence, from myMontessori training and from
having to adolescence about Ilove to get into do a deep dive.
And so I thought I'd share someof it with you today. So Dr.

(02:18):
Montessori first start, shetalks about the adolescent being
so vulnerable, like they're asfragile as a newborn. So we have
to be so careful with them, justas you would with your newborn
babes. Because they've got somany physical changes going on
the hormonal changes, thepsychological changes. So it's a
lot for them. And Dr. Montessoritalks about independence at this

(02:39):
age being social independence,which I guess comes as no great
surprise, because we know thatteenagers do like to spend more
time away from their family. Butshe also talks about economic
independence as they start toprepare for adulthood. And I
think that's really interesting,because, you know, you do see
children who don't necessarilyneed to earn money, but they do
want to earn money. And so howyou could make that happen.

(03:02):
That's really interesting aswell. What other really
fascinating things is, sheobserved that at this age, their
intellectual capacity actuallyisn't at its strongest, as it
was when they were, you know,between 6 and 12, when they a
tually had a lot of mental cpacity. And actually, what we f
nd isn't, we get to aolescence, and the workload i

(03:22):
creases exams, increase steady icreases, you know, in non M
ntessori settings as you enter imiddle school and high school p
ograms. So instead, Dr. Mntessori suggested an erdkind
r. So that's like a farm schoo. And this is their prepa
ed environment. So we're not snding them out into the real
orld. They're going to a farm,they live away from their famil
, and they're being part of aocial community, with the adult

(03:44):
. They're working alongide them, guiding, obser
ing and helping to support thatptimal development, just as it
would be in any of the otherage groups. And I honestly never
thought of it as an option for mkids. As I thought, well, it's
nice idea, but will they realllearn anything from a farm,
and I didn't like think that'd want to send my kids away

(04:06):
rom home. But had I done thisraining earlier, I might well
ave considered it. And one of thstudents actually was asked
if they miss their family, and tey said, like, not at all, but i
stead they are really calleto work together with their
peers to look after the farmnd live together. And like every
ne's contribution is value, and they really are guide
to work together as a commuity like brothers and siste

(04:27):
s. And the work they do is quiteimpressive. They have like what'
called a program of work and sudy. So physical work to take
are of the farm. They need to mantain it, they look after the a
imals, they grow vegetbles that they'll also sell
nd that they use in their kitchn. They look after bees to make
oney to take to market that'actually like one of them main

(04:49):
ources of income. They lookfter chickens and collect eggs
hich they'll use or sell. And mybe as a group they choose to im
rove the farm. For examp e,or choosing to build a new peak
house or some new accommodationfor their b&b. Because they
actually also have a shop and ab&b, as, you know, part of their
income streams as well. So thework that goes into all of that

(05:13):
is an enormous amount ofcollaboration, planning,
financing, and physical labor,which is not at all bad for an
adolescent. And then this studyis really practical. It's around
the things that are coming up onthe farm. And then they like
take a topic and they brainstormfrom that topic and come up with
what they'd like to learn aboutfor the next study period. I

(05:33):
think it's about five to eightweeks that they work on one
topic. And Jenny showed us amind map when they chose to
study money. So the topic wasmoney. And they then
brainstormed around that. Andeach student will take a couple
of these to work on and thenpresent it to the group. So a
couple of the things that shementioned were like they looked
at the origins of currency, thestock market, some of the

(05:56):
children were interested inbudgeting, which is very
practical taxes, even theMerchant of Venice. So you're
also looking at self expressionwhen you're doing your study and
things like that, as well. So Ijust thought it was such a broad
range of things. They've got,then adults who will give the
presentations that they need,they'll get in experts to give

(06:16):
seminars on topics, that welooking to see what they need to
know and who's available to helpthem. They're stunned to see the
interconnectedness of subjects.
So it can be things yeah, to dowith money, you'll be studying
maths. But there'll also bestuff to do with sciences and
arts and culture and selfexpression from each of these
study areas. So it's veryinterdisciplinary. And really

(06:39):
fascinating to see how they takesuch a practical approach to
study as well. And then they dohave to keep a journal to keep
track of their study. They alsocan have a journal to keep track
of the work on the farm. Andthey have a personal journal,
which they share with the adultsso that the adults can really
know what's going on for themand support them. So a day on

(07:00):
the farm could look like maybebeing rostered on to work in the
kitchen to make breakfast andlunch. Or if that's not their
role, then they might be workingoutside in the morning, and then
doing their study in theafternoon, or vice versa. So
there'll be studying in themorning and then working outside
in the afternoon. And thenthere's also a couple of them
who cooked dinner. And there'salso time for solitude for going

(07:22):
to the creek for going for highIQ reading, and all those kinds
of things as well. And so Iasked during the training, if
she's ever observed depression,or any mental health issues with
any of the adolescents, thingslike anxiety or panic attacks.
And she said that so far, shereally hadn't. And it's not to
say that the students don't havehardships that they need to
overcome. But they're in thissafe prepared environment where

(07:45):
they can try things out. Andthey're taking on different
roles. And you have the adultsthere as guides to support them
if you needed. So I just thoughtit sounded really, really cool.
And if we don't have that in thecity, then it would be looking
for somewhere that they can gothat is their own, like when
they're working on somethingmuch bigger than themselves. So

(08:06):
maybe working with others toraise money for a cause or where
they have to arrange an event.
And they have complete controlso they can really feel part of
something and that they'recontributing to their community.
One of the participants on thecourse, I was actually working
with adolescents in LA, andhelping them to come up with
ideas how they could improvetheir local area, for example,

(08:27):
turning a bad lot into a gardenor making a theatre arts group,
whatever they were interestedin, and then they were
supporting them with theplanning and to get the
logistics together to help themmake it happen. So anyway, this
is just a small part. I'm tryingto summarize 30 hours of
training into a couple ofminutes. But you can read more

(08:47):
about Dr. Montessori's ideas arund adolescence in Appendix A an
B of the book "From Childhood tAdolescence". So I'll put a
ink to that in the show notesor you. And actually just read
he whole book because the restf the book is about the six to
2 year olds. And the Appendix Cs about the fourth plane
hild's from 18 to 24 years. Andctually I find that one of Dr.

(09:08):
ontessori is more accessibleates. So sorry if that was a
it longer than usual. But Iope you found it interesting.
nd let's not wait any longer.
ere is my conversation withna-Kay from Pickneys at Play.
Hi everyone, Simone here and Iam so excited to introduce today

(09:31):
Ana-Kay from Pickneys at Play,who we found each other via
Instagram. And I was so excitedthat she said yes that she'd
come and talk to us today aboutraising twins. And I'd love to
get into the culture, theJamaican culture that you
introduce in your home andanything yeah, anyway, it's
gonna be so much fun aboutseeing how Montessori looks
different in every family. Sowelcome. Hi, I'm so happy to be

(09:56):
here. You know, thank you somuch for inviting me and I'm so
excited.
I wanted to talk about the twinsand all that we do here.
It's fun, it's a lot of fun.
Yeah. And we actually maybethat's a good place to start is,
you know, from what I see onlineJaax and Juju as such differen
characters. And so would yointroduce us to them and lik
their favorite things to doSure. They're just so different

(10:18):
They're complete opposite twinborn at the same time, that'
the only thing they have icommon. Besides that, they'r
two different people completelyJuju sense of order is top
otch, this child is so helpful.
e remembers everything, he eveneminds me of the order of
hings. And he's very helpful.
e's always helping Jaax with,ith getting dressed, or you

(10:42):
now, even completing hisuzzles, he'll do a little
oints, you know, to remind himhere things should go. And he's
uper animated with hisxpressions, kind of like me. So
love that Jaax is verypurposeful with his decisions,
he has to see an activitythrough to the end, he's always
singing while he works. And heloves dancing. And I'm realizing

(11:02):
this child is a trickster. Heloves to like sneak up on me.
And he's very playful. And theyjust turn to and it's just so
much fun. A lot of people liketo say that, even though the age
two is kind of rough, you havelots of tantrums, the terrible
twos as they call it, but I havefound it actually to be great is

(11:23):
likea button clicked off in their
brain. And they're completelydifferent people now they can
express themselves, when they'reupset about something. their
personalities are shining.
They're developing a sense ofhumor, and the one of the best
things actually, they're notmouthing everything anymore. So

(11:43):
we can do so many more funthings together, don't be
worried that they're going to beputting everything in their
mouth. So that is love it. Ilove this age, and I'm really
happy. Yeah, that's amazing. Imean, you know, myself, I'm a
big fan of the toddler, I wrotea love letter to the toddler in
my toddler, because toddlers arebrilliant, and they're capable
of doing so much. And you dostart to see everything kind of

(12:04):
falling into place. I actuallyloved seeing one of your
Instagram posts where theystarted to match their vehicles
to the pictures of you.
And they started singing Thewheels on the bus soon
afterwards. Butthat's one of the language
activity, they're matching theobjects to the photos, Jaax, he'
the more musical one at thmoment, because they do chang

(12:25):
their personalities change athey get older. So we wer
looking at the bus and thpickup truck and the deliver
truck. And we had all the imagelaid out and they were doing th
work. And then all of a suddenit's like Jaax saw the bus, li
ht bulb went off. And he startd, you know, signing wheels on
he bus. So I was like, OkayI guess activities done. Le

(12:48):
's start singing wheels on the bs. And that's the thing w
th toddlers, you know, they theyre focused on one thing,
ut they're also making connectios. And so he saw the bus,
he started to sing the song WellI started to sing the song w
th him and activity changed.
nd this is how it goes. I thnk that's so like a nice to h

(13:09):
ar though, because sometimes were so set on what we want them
to be doing. And you're jst flowing with them. And w
th twins, you're going to haveto be like that. Definitely
I realized almost everythinI plan doesn't go as planned. T
ey have something already in mnd for what they're doing. An
I think it's important to actualy allow them to explore how t

(13:30):
ey want to, even if it's not hoI intended, and it ends up be
ng so much fun to watch them andto see the different paths they
an take the same thing is aso really cool. That must be
so fun. I mean, but everyon's probably thinking like mealt
me with toddlers, two toddlersat the same time. And toileting
wo toddlers at the same time. Hve you got any tips for us

(13:51):
on either of those. So my advce would be get them involved,
ou have two extra sets of handsto help you here. I mean, it's j
st simple stuff, putting fruts into the blender for a smoot
ie cracking eggs for breakfat, they're more likely to eat w
at they've helped me prepare, soit makes my life easier too.

(14:11):
nd you know, there are times wheI don't want to bring out
he learning tower because you knw, maybe I'm rushing. So I'll j
st set a max out on the floornd the two of them will sit d
wn and we'll work right there.
nd even simply asking them to pont to one or two options for a m
al you know, if I don't havehe chance to actually have b
en preparing with me, I realze that is another simple th

(14:33):
ng that makes meal times enjoyabe. And having them choose their
wn plates and utensils is a grat transition from an activity
nd you know, but at the table,it can be a balancing act. So w
en we first got a child says tale we use a booster seat for a
ew months and then we moved ta standard toddler chair

(14:54):
I couldn't afford you know comng from struggling with t
em drinking tanswers a formula I couldn't
afford for. If one twin decidedto get up and it distracts the
other the meal would end. Andyou know, it was kind of
something I decided to modify tohave it work for us. But then
after a while I came to trust,that they know how much they

(15:15):
need to take in, and it's a lotless stressful for the family.
If they have that independence,you know, to decide that, you
know, Mommy, I'm full, and theycan get up and we actually sing
a song for them to transitionfrom eating to carrying the
dishes to the sink. And it worksreally well. They really like

(15:36):
it. And oh, yeah, but in termsof Miss, just expected there,
there's going to be a mess. So Iusually have a washcloth or a
dustpan close by. And we cleanup together and they love
cleaning. So it's it's okay. Andthen he mentioned toileting as
well. So as a first time Mom, Iwas not looking forward to it.

(15:57):
But in Montessori, they discusssensitive periods of toileting,
so I thought I'd give thatwindow a try. So I started by
giving them a gesture to go withtheir bodily function. And we
did standing diaper changes inthe bathroom to kind of make
that association. But um, oncethey did the gesture
consistently and seemedinterested in Flushing and

(16:18):
sitting on the toilet, I got abook for them to read about, you
know, using the potty, and I putout two parties. But I realized
that two parties was adistraction. So I rearranged the
environment in a way that Icould manage them both. And we
went diaper free Juju, he didn'tdo very well with underwear, or

(16:39):
the training pants. So we just,we just went diaper free. And
then things were looking upuntil we traveled for about two,
three weeks. And can you believeactually forgot the potty. And I
wasn't able to get one while wewere there. So I kind of gave up

(17:00):
and just figured out how tostart all over. But then when we
came back one day, I heard Jujtinkering in the bathroom. An
when I looked, he did it all byhimself. So they didn't fo
get, they didn't forget. And itjust shows you how amazing ch
ldren are. And you know, were not done yet. It's a long pr
cess. But it's it's going wel so far. before you move on. So

(17:22):
e people might not know about stnding diaper changes. But li
e in Montessori, rather than laing them on their back by the ti
e they're able to stand. Some ofthe children don't like to be la
d on their back. And so you caactually change them st
nding up, which actually is moe difficult for us first, but yo
can get pretty handy, right? Ye, it is actually I find it to be
easier, because I think they do't kick around as much as st

(17:44):
nding diaper changes, I have lie a stool in the bathroom th
t they can, you know, use for suport. So they'll hold on to it
While I'll help them pull thdiaper down, we do our ch
nge and they'll pull it back upSo this actually has helped th
m practice the pulling up and puling down motion a lot. And th
y like to help to get the lihts and everything is right th

(18:06):
re. And it's actually much les space that's needed. Be
ause it's just something to suport them especially they're no
really good at standing just ye. But standing up, they I gu
ss they feel more inependent. They feel like oh, yo
know, I'm part of this prcess. And this is my body. An
mommy's helping me so I can sewhat's going on. And yeah, I fo

(18:26):
nd it. It can be tricky to geused to in the beginning for me
for us as adults, but they lie it much more and in no ti
e. I'm a pro. And it's acually helpful when you're on th
go. You know, and you might nowant to lay them down on the pu
lic changing stations. So you cajust stand them up and do yo

(18:46):
r do it wherever. Well, thank yofor you know, telling us all of
the details, because I think paents think it just everyone se
ms to magically get it and wharen't my children magically ge
ting it? And like you say its a long process? Yeah, one th
ng I really noticed on it folowing your family is how yo
've really taken on preparing thenvironment for them to have su
cess, you know, the way that yohave a little drawer down lo

(19:07):
for them to get their own pltes and things. And like, can yo
tell us a little bit about hoyou've been setting up your ho
e and changing things to make thngs more accessible for them an
to give them more inependence? Of course, so ac
ually, the prepared enironment. That's one of the fi
st things that drew me to Motessori. I was like, Oh my go
, it's just these things are socute.

(19:31):
They're adorable. Look at thatlittle chair, you know, and on
top of that the house looks itlooks like a home It looks like
a home for adults and a home forchildren. It doesn't look
cluttered and it's just been afunctional. So the first thing I
did get was the weaning table,the towel size table in tears.

(19:52):
And then from there, I decidedthat I wanted them to be able to
be more independent atmealtimes. You know, get
They're played by their forksand so on. But they were much
younger at the time. How old arethey, when when I put that, that
drawer, they're probably 15months. They're really young. So

(20:12):
they're still learning plaids,and, you know, cup, they're
still learning how names hasidentified these objects. So I
remembered the three part cardsin Montessori. And I was like,
well, they're probably not readyfor this. But maybe if I still
put the word for the image, itwill help them as they grow. And

(20:37):
I will, of course name it, ofsay, this is a cup, this is a
plate. So I put these littlepictures above load drawer that
they can reach to themselves.
And it has everything that's inthe drawer is,
is depicted by one of the photosby the drawer. So we'd go over

(20:58):
there and I'd say, hey, Jaax,do you need a cup? Do you nee
a plate and then at points at ech one, we'd open the drawer
nd they'd look at the, it was lke a matching activity, you kn
w, they'd look at the plate, the'd take it out, and then they'd
be putting it to the image. AnI was like, Oh, this is cute. I
's actually working, becausI wasn't sure if it would wo
k. You know, it's it's trying i's out. And then before I know

(21:21):
t, now they're older. Theyre actually going up to the ima
es and telling me like, hy, pointing out the cup. So
'm like, oh, you're thirsty,ou know. And so we'd get the
up together, and he would goet some water. And it's been rea
ly cool to see how that one litle idea has evolved with them.
So beautiful. And even the dressng I there's a really cute

(21:44):
ow hanging rack. I don't know wat rack that is that you've us
d? And when there's just like twt shirts out for them? Yes, y
s. So in their bedroom, actualy. Funny story. So I've set t
is area up three different was, because I've been trying
to figure out what would work bst for the two of them. So
at first, we had one area withne mirror, and it was it was k

(22:09):
nd of tight for the two of thm. They would, you know, they'll
be bumping into each other. SI was like, Okay, let me put th
ir own, each have their own miror their own hanging rack for th
ir own clothes on separate sidesof the room. Again, as twins of
en do, they both gravitated towads the same one. Okay, this is

(22:32):
ot working either. So now, I hve one rack, two mirrors, and
on that rack are four shirts aa time. So I understand t
at they're not the same for shirs. So do you should choose o
e, then Jaax doesn't havehat option anymore. But the

(22:53):
e's still three more for hito choose from. And I feel
ike that's kind of how it is inthe real world, there isn't al
ays going to be two of everythng. So I do still kind of tr
to make them match when I getthe ch
to master so cute. So if I dohave to have the same shirt, I
will put them both out therehoping crossing my fingers that
they'll do the same thing. Butit doesn't usually happen. But

(23:18):
yeah, so I've got that rackonline, it's actually bathroom
self that does have a littlehook at the bottom. So I just
hang the the shirts on it and itworks perfectly. So in the
mornings when they decide tobecause I don't actually always
want to choose their clotheswhen they decide to that use

(23:39):
their shirts. And they have abasket with the shorts and get
dressed for the day. Yeah,that's cool. And I also love
that you actually gave up yourdining room so they go play area
for you. Yep, we realized thatokay, they need the space to
play. It's two of them.

(23:59):
Simone, we tried everything.
When I tell you we haverearranged our house so many
times for these boys. And thisone finally worked. So before
the dining room, we have afamily room, that's where the
television is. And we we got twoshelves, you know, because of

(24:20):
course in Montessori, you have ashelf with the toys, and this is
when they were much younger. Sowe're still figuring things out.
I was much younger on my journeyas well. We had two shelves
hoping that one would have hishis own shelf again, they always
gravitated towards the sameshelf.

(24:41):
It was a big open space. Thereare both gravitating to the one
shelf and it was very few toysand I just felt like it was more
inviting throwing and chaos thenorder. Yeah. So I was like where
in the house could we kindakeep it together, you know,
spacious but not too big. Sothat I can kind of manage what's

(25:05):
happening and observe both ofthem at the same time and kind
of make sure they're not hurtingeach other because that is
another thing. It sounds sad tosay, but
a lot of you know, materials arewooden, right? And when they're
younger, they didn't understandthat, hey, you know, my body's

(25:28):
moving really fast with this.
And they would sometimesactually accidentally hurt the
other. So that was anotherreason why we tried the two
shelves, but it didn't work. Sothe dining room just looked
perfect. We weren't using itanyway. I mean, we have a
pandemic, we weren't having anydinner parties, and we were able
to fit the table somewhere elsejust for us. So it's not as

(25:49):
pretty of a dining room anymore,but it's a pretty nice playroom
for them. So we have the oneself, there's lots of natural
light in there. And I justthought it was perfect for them.
And I think they can grow intoit. For a good time. Yeah, I
think it's so interesting to seethat like, you don't just set up

(26:11):
the shelf once and it's done,you know, like, you need to keep
trying things out what'sworking, I could that's not
working. And we're not for ourfamily anyway, and trying
different things. And I knowthat when you traveled even you
kind of like made a hotel roominto a many more
people. Oh my god, the trip wasso much fun actually had no idea

(26:32):
what I was doing. I just knewthat I needed to try something
because I wanted to still havethem have that sense of order.
Even though we were in anyplace. I was concerned that they
weren't going to sleep well, Iwas concerned that, you know,
we're in this small room,there's a TV there, I have to
have them spending their daydoing more, you know, so I was

(26:55):
like, how can I set up thisspace to work with them the the
plane ride, first of all, beforegetting to the hotel, we cared
so many stickers and the waterwhile books like mystery
painting that kind of stuff. Andthey loved it. You know, I was I
was really worried that there'sgoing to be scary because the

(27:17):
first time we traveled with themby plane, they were much
younger. So they just had abottle and went to sleep. This
time, I knew that would befascinated by everything around
them. I knew they'd stay awake,and they stayed awake the entire
three hours. And so I cameprepared with all these
activities for them to do.
And they enjoyed it.

(27:38):
They played with each other andthey played with us and they
played on their own. And thenwhen we got there to the hotel,
I was like, Okay, how can I helpthem still feel at home, you
know, without obviously havingto bring my own stool and all
these things, because I can't doall of that. Who's gonna travel
it back?

(27:59):
So I use the suitcase. I usecarry on. Yeah, they were able
to climb up on the carry on washtheir hands, sits on a second
carry on and puts on her boots.
And, of course, we would lay outtheir clothes, kind of like on
the bed.
So they'd be able to just climbup, look at it, choose what they

(28:21):
want and get dressed and readyfor the day. Yeah, so cool. So
you can just improvise, right?
Yeah, improvise. Definitely.
Definitely. I mean, and evenwhen we're in Jamaica, anyway,
it might sound confusing, justto be clear, we left home went
to New Jersey. And then we wentfrom New Jersey to Jamaica,
because I hadn't seen my familyin so long. And I figured it

(28:44):
would be best to just traveltogether and have their help for
the flight. So when we went toJamaica now
I realized, okay, I don't haveall my cute little stuff that I
have for them at home, there'sonly one stool here.
It's a pretty decent sizedhouse. There are no baby

(29:07):
proofing anywhere. How can Ihelp them to still move freely
without, you know, hurting theenvironment, aka grandma's
house, my mother's house, andhow can I have them be able to
be involved, you know, withoutme having to lift them up. And

(29:28):
actually I can't lift them bothup at the same time anymore.
They're too big. So weintroduced the traveling stool,
the one stool became thetraveling stool. We've taken
from room to room, and they usechairs instead of our learning
tower. So they climb up andthey'd help us in the kitchen.
And we just learned limits. Youknow, grandma's house has limits

(29:50):
that our house does not and youknow it's just talking to them
and figuring it out and we had agood time.
Wow, that must have been alsolovely because you talk about
wanting to introduce yourculture to the board, you live
in the US and you know, you havethis Caribbean culture that you
want to introduce to them. So tospend some time with your

(30:14):
family, but also how youintroduce some of your culture
back when you're back home aswell. Would you like to talk
about those to us? Yeah, it'svery important for us. So me and
my husband were from Jamaica,we're now living in America, but
we really want our children tounderstand where we're from, and
to maybe even feel like they arefrom there, too. So a big thing
is language at home, we speak tothem in Patois. So that's our

(30:38):
national dialect of Jamaica,because it's really important to
me that they can understand it.
You know, when we're aroundfamily, that's how they'll also
speak. And even better if theycan speak it to
music, that's a big thing here,it's music is so powerful. So

(30:59):
that's more language exposure tothem. And also some of our dance
moves. Because you know, inJamaica, we love to dance.
Then the food, I actually put uppictures of some of Jamaica's
traditional foods and plants bytheir table. So as we eat, we
can talk about them. And it wasactually really cool. Because
when we went to Jamaica, theygot the chance to actually feel

(31:21):
and taste some of these fruitsin real life. And it was just
amazing seeing everything cometogether. And you know, I just
know if you continue this, asthey get older, they'll be able
to identify with Jamaica the wayme and daddy do. Oh, that's
beautiful. Actually, was yourmom impressed? Or surprised? Or
questioned some of your onestory things? Oh, my gosh,

(31:43):
questions. So many of my momsare like, why not just put their
boots on and let's go outsideand like know, they can do it
themselves. What they actuallyfound that some of the easiest
ways to get my family on boardwas through practical life
activities. Honestly, I thinkit's immediately impressive.

(32:06):
Honestly, it might soundshallow, but it's immediately
impressive. So you see a childwalking around with a glass,
drinking from a glass andpouring his own water? Or, like
I said, even putting on selfdressing at such a young age,

(32:26):
you start to question like, Howdoes he know how to do that? I'm
like, Well, you know, you satdown and we put the boots in
front of him. And he's seen medo it. So we watch them see what
he would do what they would do.
And eventually they started torealize my whole family, they

(32:47):
started to realize that Okay,there is something to this
Montessori.
There is something here, becausethey they act like big people is
what they would say. They'rebehaving like big adults. And
I'm like, Well, maybe not bigadults, but they are more
capable than we think. That'sno, right. You don't try to take

(33:07):
away their childhood. But theydid exactly. So pleased with
themselves as well. Yeah. I loveto see their faces when they get
something. They're just like,the lights of the room. And I'm
like looking at face if I didit, you wouldn't have seen that
face. You know, if I did it forhim or for them? It's not the
same. No, I mean, even like theway that they carry their little

(33:27):
plate to the sink.
Yeah.
In the hamper. Mm hmm. They lovethey love to help out with those
things. And, for example, yousaid carrying the plate to the
sink, it's, I guess, normal inour family to help each other
with those things. So you know,that's another thing. My mother

(33:49):
would be helping to clear thetable and I'm like, No, mommy
can do it. He can do it. Andshe's like, Oh, it's okay. And
I'm like, Yeah, but if this isokay, he can do it. And then
she'd watch him do it and thenshe'd be blown away and it's
just so cute.
And find them then they start toask more about Montessori
because they realize that okay,this adorable thing has more to

(34:15):
it than just being so cute.
There's a lot more to it.
Absolutely. I love seeing likethem washing the windows.
You're doing a lot, but thiswasn't always the way Okay, so
let's go back actually Youstarted, you didn't know about
Montessori. And you were beingtold, oh, they're premature. So

(34:36):
they might be behind inmilestones and all those kinds
of things. And at one point youjust went I have to do this a
different way. Tell us how youcame to know Montessori and
yeah, how you learned about itand now make it look, you know,
I can expertThanks. Well, okay, so Yeah,
pretty much. Pretty much ourbabies, they were 31 weeks. So
that's actually notSuper premature, but still cause

(34:59):
for concern.
Every day, every doctor's visit,you'd hear, oh, they're going to
be behind. They won't catch upuntil they're two, hopefully.
And I was like, Oh my gosh, youknow, as a first time mother, I
was worried all the time. So ontop of just being new to

(35:25):
motherhood, I was worried thatI don't know how to help them,
you know. So I found myselfgoogling, like, what to do with
a four month old, what should Ido with a six month old because
they're just sitting in thebounces just staring into space?
And I'm like, I feel likethey're supposed to be doing
more than this, you know, and Ifeel like it's my responsibility

(35:45):
to help them catch up codes andcode, so to speak. How do I get
them ahead? Like, all thedoctors are telling me they'll
need to? So I stumbled upon avideo of a baby that was just
playing with this simple, simpletoy, I think it was the

(36:08):
interlocking discs. And themother was explaining, you know,
like, all the benefits and and Iwas like, really, all of this
from that little thing. Like,what else is this child playing
with? So that is the power ofsocial media, you know? So I
started scrolling and I waslike, okay, Montessori, hmm,

(36:28):
Google Montessori and I gotfurther and further into it. And
then I was like, Okay, thisseems like the thing. This seems
like, it will help me not worryabout them catching up. But just
kind of help them with wherethey are.
So I'd say at six months is whenI started to get my first

(36:53):
materials and we got some of theMontessori mobiles. And
that's kind of where we startedbut also stopped for a while,
you know, we had all the nicetoys. And still, we also had the
overstimulating ones, we stilldidn't have the environment

(37:17):
perfectly set up for them.
Because I would say it wasoverwhelming having twins. There
wasa lot. You know, twins can be
hard. Any new first timemotherhood is, is a challenge
you need to this. And then let'sdouble it, you know, and then I

(37:37):
wasn't so well, after givingbirth. So I was like, Okay, I
don't know if I can manageteaching myself something new,
on top of teaching myself how tobe a mom. So I did kind of delay
it until 14 months, like, Okay,you know what, I want to take

(37:57):
this seriously, I kind of feltlike there was this
invisible window of opportunity,you know, that I didn't want to
miss. So as I said, let me justjump on is now let me make this
decision. Because I want to Iwant to try, I want to give it

(38:19):
my everything. And so what did Ido next? I started to prepare
the environment. That's thefirst thing I did. I got rid of
a bunch of stuff, and made itmore simple for them. And things
started clicking. I mean, Irealized, okay, I did this with

(38:41):
Juju a couple times. I showedhim how to use this material.
And now he's he's really workinghard on it on his own. I don't
need to hover over him. I canmove on. And spend some time
with dex. You know, there's twoof them. So actually, the fact
that Montessori is all aboutindependence is perfect. When

(39:02):
you're one against two. Yeah,well, yeah. Because now I can
walk over to Jaax see what he'sdoing. Oh, he needs me email.
Let's say something happened.
And he actually, he needs me,Juju is fine. He's over there.
He's working on whatever is,let's say the object permanence
box. He's He's working withthat. Let me turn to Jaax right

(39:23):
now. Um, and then there aretimes when they had both played
together. Well, sorry, notpleased to get that that young
age. They don't really, theydon't really play together. But
they'll be playing on their own.
And I could just watch them andthat could sit down. And then
their times, of course, and theywanted me to play with both of
them. So I'd sit by them and itwas just peaceful. Wow.

(39:49):
And I was loving it. And then Irealized that okay, Montessori
is not so much about thechildren. You might think that
sounds weird to sayBut it's actually about me. It's
my mindset. And that's somethinglike a term I like to use a lot
the Montessori mindset, becauseif I sit down and think, Okay,

(40:12):
how can I get Jaax to reallyfocus on this? How can I get
Juju you to feel like he's partof the family because he loves
so much to be in what I'm doing,you know, how can I let him feel
like it's okay to be in what I'mdoing, you know? And how can I

(40:32):
get myself to be patient andrelax, be relaxed about
everything that's happening sothat they, they want to do these
things more often. And they wantto help themselves more often.
Yeah, I think that kind ofclicked our own 14 months, and
then I just dove right in.
started to do all Thanks.

(40:56):
Yeah, so it's less than a yearand you've come so far, right?
Yeah, yeah, it is less than ayear, it's actually about 10
months. To be exact. Yes, turnto you. Yeah. And another thing
I realized is, it's not as Istarted to do all the things,
but I didn't do all the thingsall at the same time. It's a

(41:20):
tribe that started to getoverwhelmed. And I was like, oh,
but they need to have theirwardrobe areas that they need to
have their kitchen areas thatthey need to have. To this day,
they actually don't even I thinkI just set up their water
station. Yeah, like, two weeksago.
Because I think now, mychildren, you know, every child

(41:43):
is different, but I think mychildren are able to handle the
responsibility of free access towater now. So I just set that
up.
I couldn't set everything up allat the same time, I think you
would have been crazy for me totry to monitor both of them, you
know, trying to get wanted toget that same time. And maybe

(42:04):
one got two months, and it'sspilling and then he might slip
and fall while the other one isthere. You know, tinkering with
something? It's, it's enough tojuggle, you know, with twins. So
you kind of have to see howhow, you know, you'll be able to
get them to have independence,but not get me frustrated by

(42:26):
them maybe having too much allat the same time that they
probably not ready for. And I'mnot ready for, you know, yeah.
as well. Right. Exactly. So itwas a lot to kind of realize
where I have to start, and thenprogress from there. And I'll

(42:50):
say they amaze you, because youdon't really know what they're
ready for all, you know,immediately. And they've been
doing really well with the waterstation. So maybe if I had it
out earlier, it would have beenfine. would have been fine. But
I chose to wait. So choose towait for a couple of things

(43:10):
because not necessarily that Iwant to perfect it but I want to
make sure I can handle it.
Yeah, that's so important torecognize. And so I guess your
understanding of Montessori ischanging as well like when you
first came across Montessori andwhat you know about Montessori
now and I'm sure it willcontinue to evolve on your
Montessori journey. But wouldyou tell us a little bit how you
thought Montessori was and howyou're finding it. Now? Of

(43:33):
course, I thought Montessori waspretty self with beautiful toys.
I thought Montessori wasyour child
doing everything on their ownwithout any interruption. Any
interaction from me aboutMontessori meant he had to buy

(44:01):
so many things.
And now I'm seeing that it'sactually so opposite. Yeah, it's
so opposite.
You don't have to buy lots ofthings. You try to make it work
and I'm talking about Montessoriat home. homeschooling for older

(44:21):
age. I know that's completelydifferent. But I'm talking about
toddler stage where we're justwe're living a Montessori
lifestyle with two year olds. Ireally don't think you have to
buy them any things. You want toprepare your environment. Yes,
but I do think the mostimportant thing is a stool.

(44:42):
stool. Yeah, yes. That's thenumber one thing.
Now I realized that Montessoriis actually synonymous with
respect.
And if you're trying to get yourfamily on board with Montessori,
I think that's a wordYou can use is respect respect
for the child, you know, respectfor yourself respect for the

(45:06):
home. Understanding that thisyoung mind actually is capable
of much more than you think.
Understanding that, yes, youstill need to love them like a
baby and laugh with them andplay with them like a toddler.
But you can still also speak tothem like an adult, so to speak,

(45:26):
you know, with that amount ofrespect.
Yeah, Montessori issays amazing. It's it has
layers.
It has layers and you don't needto dive in and buy all the
things you don't need to worryabout what Montessori looks

(45:47):
like, in somebody else's home.
You don't need tochange who you are.
To fit in to what you mightthink it is. Because it's your
home.
And if you're respecting yourchild, that's the number one

(46:10):
step already. If you're tryingto help this child to earn
respect to mean so much. I mean,I'm not just saying talking to
them respectfully, I mean, thewhole everything, if you're
trying to tell yourself, okay,my child can make decisions, you
know, he has an opinion, how canI help him express himself
freelywithout judgment, and without

(46:36):
being upset with the outcome,you know, so I'm gonna give him
options that I'm okay with.
Like, for example, the wardrobeis like an example. And I'm not
gonna give them the entirecloset to choose from because
well, it happened once.

(46:59):
It happened. And yeah, Juju, youwas trying to wear a robe the
whole day. And I'm like, Juju,it's really hot. This robe is
good to work. Let's trysomething else. And then you
know, you might get, you mightget some frustration from the
child. So yeah, it's setting upa space to help them achieve

(47:22):
their little goals. You mightseem a little girls to you, that
are really big goals to them.
And it's just so nice to seetheir face when they're happy.
And when they've achievedsomething that I worked so hard
on, and you're right therebetter side helping them do all
this, all these things. So yeah,it's, this is amazing. I love
it. I could go on and onforever. I think it's really

(47:44):
interesting. How do you balancethat? Like, you spend some time
on social media documenting, youknow, your journey and you see
other people's families? And howdo you balance that with like
thinking, Oh, it has to be thatperfect home? Or I don't see
myself represented here or I'mtoo noisy for one. Sorry, not
right for our family.
That I love that you said I'mtoo noisy because yeah,

(48:07):
honestly, a lot of times I'mlike, oh, when I talk to my
boys, I feel like I am talkingto my friend the you know, like
in terms ofit's very vibrant, you know,
speak very, in a very vibranttone. And I'm like, Oh my gosh,
maybe I need to sound moresoothing and it'll calm we're
calm. And that is me comparing,you know, I don't think any

(48:30):
dummy comm family is anythingbut vibrant. That's just how we
are. We can't help you. It'semails. And so yeah, I did start
out when I was documenting, whenI started documenting the
journey, I was a little nervous,like, I put something out there
and I'm like, Oh my gosh, wherepeople tend to think. And then

(48:51):
you get the comments fromfamilies that say thank you. You
know, my, my kitchen is also notvery tidy right now. Or, Oh, I
love that song too. You know, Ididn't know it was okay to have
been listened to Eye of theTiger
that's Jaax's favorite song, youknow, um, it's just being

(49:15):
authentic can kind of be scary,sometimes online because you
don't know what you're going toget. But as still want to keep
it up for other families thatthat are comforted knowing that
Montessori is not one box.
And I don't think anyone really,truly intended it for it to look

(49:36):
that way. You know, but maybejust in terms of, I don't know,
maybe that's just how it seems.
But it's not, you know, it's byeverybody, any type of family
any no matter where you're from,no matter who you are. And
juggling, in terms of time, isactually also kind of hard.

(50:01):
But I try not to have the time Ispend capturing some of these
moments to take over the day. Imean, it's really not that much
of the data is shared, it seemsa lot on Instagram. But
honestly, it's really not somuch more happens. I really wish
I had my camera out all thetime. So I could show you guys

(50:21):
some of the hilarious thingsthat happens, but it's just not
possible.
No, it's not meant to interfereeither. Yeah, yeah. All right.
balance, isn't it between justreading it, but also just being
present in the moment to exactlyavailable? And that's our role
as well. Exactly. And a big partof your family as well is your

(50:42):
religion and how you do that toyour boys. You have morning
devotion? And what does thatlook like in your home? Oh, my
gosh, it's as everything the oneword I use is adorable.
Most people would describedevotion as adorable. But first
we'd start out just by prayinglike, they'd be running around

(51:04):
this is when they were younger,they'd be running around, but
I'd still pray with them. Nowthat they're older, and this
shows you that they're watching,even they don't seem to be
watching. As they come on, let'spray, I'll kneel down and now
they kneel down with me. Andthey do not move. Even if it's
grace, they don't take a bite.
And I've never once said, don'teat until you say grace, nothing

(51:26):
like that. But they don't take abite until we're done saying
grace. And that's just themwatching and absorbing what's
going on around them, they seeus do it, they realize, oh, meal
doesn't start until after we seegrace. I mean, obviously, there
are times when one of them willprobably been nibbling on

(51:47):
something already by the time westarted. But I mean, for the
most part,that reverence is there without
us having to have have toldthem, you know, be reverence,
you know, stop what you'redoing, or to be too forceful
with it. It's, it's a part of mylife is a part of my husband's

(52:08):
life, and it's going over intotheir lives. And I love it.
We have a lot of books thatspeak on Christianity. Well,
it's simple books, of course,there too. So it's God made the
ocean and God made the rainforest and stuff like that. Just
very simple for them to hearabout God more and Jesus. And,

(52:32):
you know, they, we hope as theyget older, they'd want to
understand more about who is Godand who is Jesus, you know, but
now, we just make Sorry, it'spart of the day, you know, it's
a name they hear me call to veryoften. And eventually, I know
just like, how they're nowkneeling down to pray with us,

(52:55):
they're gonna be, you know,asking questions, and at that
point, when they're older, wecan explain deeper about it and
see how it goes. Yeah, I lovehearing different wonders,
sorry, families, you know, theirreligion in their home in their
unique way. Because, like yousaid, like Montessori is meant
to be about your home and yourculture. And that's what you're,

(53:16):
you know, exposing them to andthat absorbent mind is picking
up what's important to you.
Yeah, really beautiful.
Beautiful. Yeah. Another thing Ireally love seeing in your home
is the opportunity for maximumeffort.
in the throes of that age. Oh,do you monitor some of their
favorite things for maximumeffort right now? Oh, my gosh,

(53:37):
what isn't? You know, toddlers,they just love anything twice
their size, they're alwayspushing, pulling, lifting heavy
objects. So I've been trying tocreate opportunities for them to
exert this energy in typicalthings we do in our day anyway.
So for example, unpackinggroceries, they'll help us carry
the milk to the to the fridge.
They have a water dispenser now.

(54:01):
So they'd carry the large jugsof water. And you know, of
course, I'd help them to pour itin, but they really want to be
part of the process. Evencarrying their sensory table
outside activities. Again, it'snot something they can do on
their own, but just me holdingit and they have a hand on it as
well. It makes them feel youknow, they're really trying.

(54:22):
They're trying, Juju loves tohelp around the house. He's
using a vacuum cleaner trying toclean the pool. My friends
actually think it's hilariousthat the boys do so much
housework, but I know how muchit fulfills them and how great
is for the they're developingconfidence, strength and simply
feeling like part of the family.
So I like to get them involvedin as much as I can. I just get

(54:45):
tricky like when they copy eachother but it's like more like
the climbing onto a chair orsomething more difficult though.
Copying happens all the time.
Until recently. It feels likeit's been more bad than
good habits that they've beencopying. But what I usually do
with climbing as an example,I'll take down the train that

(55:07):
was following first, then takedown the other. And if he
becomes upset, I'll try toredirect and explain why. And
it's not until doing that more,I realize that sometimes we
think our children canunderstand us, maybe because of
their level of language, youknow, what they can express, we

(55:28):
think they're not understanding.
But actually, the more Iexplained situations to them, I
realized the less, they're, youknow, likely to repeat these
unwanted behaviors. But this isreal life. So a lot of times, I
do explain things to them, andit happens again. So if it
becomes a pattern, I reevaluatethe space, for example, in the
beginning of our journey, I hadto keep the learning towers

(55:52):
tucked away, you know, the, thekitchen help us for them to be
able to climb up and help me outbecause of, because with two
toddlers, it can becomedangerous quickly. And
I just didn't want to take thatrisk for me to be trying to get
one down while the other one,you know, you understand. So now

(56:12):
that we've used it so manytimes, and they understand what
it's for, I can keep them outwithout keep the learning
tellers out without worrying,I'll find a child in the sink,
for example. So I'd say ourMontessori home environment is a
great definition of freedomwithin limits. We enable
independence in lots of ways.
But to keep it safe, consideringit's one of me and two of them,

(56:33):
access to certain things hasbeen gradual. Another thing I
also really appreciate is that,like you say, it's not really
now about the materials and youcan make things like you've got
a few DIY things that you'vebeen using at home, like the one
I found really fun was theenormous object permanence.
Like, yeah, happy box orsomething. Yes. Oh, my goodness.

(56:53):
So my husband loves to makethings for them. I'm not very
crafty.
More digital, crafty, he'sactually hands crafty. So he
loves to make things for them.
So the object permanence box isthat was one of the first
toddler materials we got forthem. And I loved it. And they

(57:14):
loved it, too. But they grew outof it. And then he just made a
huge one, he made a huge one.
And they love it. They play withit all day. And it adds that
maximum effort, it kind of likeevolves, actually the benefits
of an object permanence box,because now they're losing this

(57:35):
heavy ball. And, you know,they're actually kind of trying
to throw in there. Andwe also DIY, what else do we do
I owe a really big chalkboardfor them. To help them with
working on a vertical surfaceand you know, bigger the better
for twins. But any verticalsurface will do.
So, oh, I also DIY the placemat.
But then that was me.

(58:04):
That was actually me, because Ifelt like, hey, why not just try
to make the shape of a fork anda spoon and just kinda help them
understand how to set the table?
You know, there's so many thingsin Montessori that we can make
ourselves using what we alreadyhave. I mean, that box,
obviously, when we made thatpurchase, we didn't realize
we're gonna make an objectpermanence box out of it. But I

(58:25):
looked at it, and I was like,Ooh, this is so nice. We should
keep it and then that he waslike, I know exactly what I can
do with this box.
That's so great. And, you know,do you find that there's that
balance between that you want toplay together a bit? Or
sometimes they interrupt eachother? And yeah, how much do you
show them? Yeah, what does playlook like? I guess in your

(58:47):
house, right now, with two yearold twins.
They actually their interestsare really different. So when it
comes to play outside of shelfwork, I would say if it's
something like that huge objectpermanence box, obviously,
they're both going to gravitatetowards something new, something

(59:09):
that you know, fabulous thatthey don't see every day,
they're gonna run both run toit. And it isn't really hard to
get them on board with doing thesame thing in terms of like,
let's say, a practical lifeactivity. Because once they see
me, you know, like rushing tothe laundry room with my hamper.
They're like, Oh, where's mommygoing? They want to join me. But

(59:33):
there are times very few whenI'd say they don't want to do
the same thing. And again,because of how we have the place
set up, that isn't really anissue.
Jaax would probably if there'ssomething Juju's doing that Jaax
doesn't care to be part of, he'dprobably just watch you know, or
eventually he wander off and godo something on his own and I'm

(59:57):
okay with that. You know, Iactually like to see them.
doing different things, I don'twant to ever feel like they have
to do the same thing all thetime together all the time. It's
cute. But they're their ownperson. So, you know, yeah, they
do different things. And I justkind of stick with the one that
I feel like will need the mostassistance from me like maybe

(01:00:20):
it's outside and you know how tomake sure you're safe. while
checking in on other one andthat kind of thing. You know,
you juggle it.
Yeah, super nice. And, okay,aside from parenting, because
you clearly get a lot of joy outof being with the boys. But what
is feeding you right now? Whatare you enjoying? I mean, maybe
it's just Montessori andstudying more about it. But now

(01:00:42):
there are other things thatyou're enjoying as well,
actually documenting it is somuch fun.
actually did start that for me,in the beginning, because I
had to deal with someI had to deal with some anxiety
issues, especially with thepandemic kind of made it worse.

(01:01:05):
So I needed something to take mymind off of it. So I was like,
well, maybe I should kind of putmy everything into, into I'm
documenting our journey. And youknow, maybe we can actually help
other people to, to see how wedo things maybe a little
differently. I felt that Istudied film, in college.

(01:01:31):
So it's something I enjoy, likeediting videos, editing images,
is is just so much fun to me.
It's a hobby, and it used to be,you know, kind of like my
vocation on vacation at the sametime. Yeah, so putting that
creative, like being able to usethat creative side of me, online

(01:01:52):
to help other people. It wasjust fun. It was a no brainer, I
really when I got started, andpeople were actually benefiting
and I was like oh my goodness,and didn't realize I could
inspire so many other people andhave them messaging me and
making so many friends actually,at the same time, all while
being able to use myyou know, mental space on

(01:02:17):
something else. Instead ofworrying about what's going on
in the world and going on withmy own personal things. And it
was just that's really how Ispend most of my time outside,
but completely on Montessorirelated. I am watching a movie.

(01:02:39):
I love to watch movies. That'sme and my husband's thing to do.
We used to go to the moviesalmost every weekend, before
children. Now we watch moviestogether very often. I feel like
I have a soundtrack to my lifebecause I also really enjoy
soundtracks. And we play them inthe house a lot. So a lot of

(01:03:00):
their favorite songs happened tobe from movies. And yeah, it's
just do you have a favorite torecommend?
Well, I can tell you my favoritein all of life is Moulin Rouge.
Ah, you know, it's a musical. Itis by Baz Luhrmann. And he's
Australian. Yeah, I love that. Imean, I know all lines by hearts

(01:03:23):
and all the songs is justamazing. Oh, that's so fun. And
I guess coming to the end of ourchat, now that you look back,
what do you wish you had knownearlier? or What advice would
you give to people who are juststarting out on the Montessori
journey? or? Yeah, somethingthat you think that you would
have liked to know? Maybe? Iwish I didn't worry so much

(01:03:45):
about not doing it, right.
Because I think that's why,remember I said I didn't start
fully until they were 14 monthsbecause I thought I had to teach
myself this whole new thing. Butit isn't really that much of a
thing that you have to like,worry about getting it right,

(01:04:06):
getting it wrong, or doing ithow this family's doing it, or
you know, doing it your own way.
It's fine. Once you realize, oronce I realized how much I can
help my children just bythinking differently about what
they're able to do and settingup my house to help them do

(01:04:27):
these things. It all kind ofstarted to fall into place. So
the only regret I do have is notstarting early. Oh,
yeah. I don't think it hurts usthat much. I don't think it hurt
them, I should say. Yeah, butpersonally, I do wish we started
earlier. It's never too late tostart. Yeah, it's never too late

(01:04:50):
to start because it didn't hurtthem. It didn't hurt them.
They're thriving, every doctor'svisit, you know circling back to
the the whole fact that thereare premature
Every doctor's visit was kind oflike, Uh, oh, wow, he's doing
this. And he's doing that andoh, cognitively. Wow, that's
amazing. And physically Oh,well, I guess they missed that

(01:05:11):
mark. And I'm like, yeah, youknow, let's not worry about the
milestones so much. That, youknow, we have these milestone
charts and you look at this, andyou're like, Oh, my gosh, my
child is not doing this yet. Andhe's X amount of age. It's,
it will happen, you know, itwill come and it's, let's just,
we just don't need to worryabout our children as much as we

(01:05:32):
think we do. We just need tolove them and help them along,
you know, guide them along. Andwith twins, it's a lot to
juggle, there's two of them, Iwant to view, but just do what
you can when you can.
And don't stress about it. Okay,so is there anything else that
we missed that we didn't get todiscuss that you'd like to talk

(01:05:54):
about? Well, okay, um, so when Istarted my journey, you know,
the fact that I didn't see anyother twin moms online, was very
discouraging. I saw all thesetoddlers doing all these amazing
things. And I'm like, Yeah, butwhat when he had, what do you do
when you have same age siblings?
It's not, it's a whole differentballgame.

(01:06:19):
What do you do? Is this evenpossible? Is there a book is
there, you know, so I did dosome research. And I found a
website, but it's, it seemed tobe inactive at a time.
So as like, let me just try mybest, you know, I'm not perfect.
I don't know. In the beginning,I was so new to it. So a lot of

(01:06:42):
what I shared was just as Iwould call Messi Montessori at
the time, I was trying, youknow, to be there for that other
twin mother that probably reallywanted to do it, but didn't see
it done. So thought maybe itwasn't a thing. And you know,
since I started, I've met somany twin moms. It's crazy. So

(01:07:05):
many twin moms that really wantsto do mon sorry, so many twin
moms that have been trying butare afraid to document it, or I
should say hesitant to documentit, because
it can look chaotic sometimes.
And also, I met another lovelytwin mother who is doing it. And
she's documenting and you know,we're chatting online at night

(01:07:28):
sharing stories, and it just Ifeel less alone, you know, in
the journey. So it's I'm reallyhappy that I've met all these
people and was able to just gofor it and start started that
account. Yeah, so other cases,it's possible, everyone, it's
possible.

(01:07:50):
Yeah. Well, I know that everyoneis going to want to check out
your Instagram which is Pickneysat Play. You're hilarious reels.
Your filmmaking skills arecoming out for sure. And also,
we didn't mention that whatPickney is means in Oh, yeah,
Pickney. That's just a child.
It's just way to say child inJamaica. Actually. It's more
it's in the Caribbean. Yeah,they recognize pick me as a

(01:08:13):
child. So it's just a term of,you know, in their music. Yeah,
exactly. So we're all going tofollow along and pick these at
play to keep seeing yourMontessori journey. Thank you so
much for your time today. It wasso fun to get an insight into
your life with the twins and howmuch joy it brings to you. You
can just hear it in your voiceand your energy. We love it.

(01:08:34):
Thank you so much for being partof our Montessori community.
Thank you so much, Simone.
Thanks for making people like mefeel welcome. And know that you
know, it's, it's okay to do ityour way. Thank you so much.
You're so inviting and helpful.
And I just thank you for havingme on the show.

(01:09:10):
I loved so much about thatconversation. And one thing I
really enjoyed was hearing aboutthey're constantly adjusting
their house. They're basicallybeing like scientists, they're
trying things out and thenadjusting them as things change.
Because Montessori is neverfinished. It is totally a
journey. And yes, there arelayers. It I like to say it's
like an onion and you could justkeep pulling back the layers.

(01:09:31):
Okay, I'll set up my home andthen you pull back the next
layer. And now I'm going to givea bit more control over to my
child and you pull back the nextlayer and then you keep
adjusting your house as yourchildren grow. And so it goes on
during our Montessori journey.
So now it's time for this week'slistener question. And if you do
ever want to submit a question,you can visit my website at the

(01:09:52):
Montessori notebook.com. And youcan click on the podcast tab and
submit your question there. Iusually choose ones that we
haven't spoken about much on thepodcast or questions that are
getting asked a lot. And yourquestion might get selected to
be answered in a future episodeor in my newsletter. And so
today's question is from Eva,and Eva asks, my daughter, who

(01:10:12):
recently turned to is reallyinto counting at the moment, she
had a beautiful abacus that sheuses all the time. She of
course, gets the order wrongmost of the time and generally
counts 1 2 ... 8 9 10 I want tohelp her slowly get the hang of
it. But I don't want to say no,you're doing it wrong. Counting
goes like this. I try to do thisby counting out loud when
possible, for example, the cupsof coffee when she helps me

(01:10:34):
coffee, or the number oftomatoes for dinner? Man, I'm
insecure about how I can helpher best when she's kind of
herself. Should I just leave herto it? Should I correct her? Or
should I count together? Or whatwould be the Montessori way to
help her? So thanks, Eva, Ithink that it's a great
question. Because, you know, itmight not be counting, but other
people might be wondering thesame about wish like birthday

(01:10:56):
pillows, if they're saying themwrong, or if they name an animal
incorrectly, or will justanything. And so often we do we
just want to jump in and correctthem in that moment. Anyway,
just to reassure you that, yes,her counting like that with 128
910. That's a super normal waythat I've observed children to
start with counting, just toreassure you as well. And in

(01:11:18):
Montessori, we are careful notto jump in and correct them.
Because when we tell them thatthey're wrong, they may stop
trying or wait to be corrected,or they might even just look to
us. And so I know it is hard totrust that they really will get
it in their own time. But Iwould do exactly as you are
doing, you're observing, you'remaking a mental note that
they're you know which numbersthey're missing. And then just

(01:11:41):
use opportunities in daily life,like you say, to keep saying
them correctly, we're unpackingthe oranges, one and two, and
three, and they're getting theone to one correspondence of
like, this is one apple, this istwo apples. As we're climbing
the stairs, you can again 123456and keep going. And like all of
this input is going into theirabsorbent mind. And then one day

(01:12:04):
they will be saying it in thecorrect order.
It would be similar in languageto so for example, they start
with like there's a wolf wolf.
And we don't say, Oh, no, it's adog. But we might just repeat it
back to them in a normalsentence like, Oh, can you see
the dog so that we're givingthem that correct vocabulary
that they will eventually absorband then be saying later. And if

(01:12:25):
they pointed say to somethingthat was blue, and they go, Oh,
yellow, then I might just make amental note. Ah, they're
starting to be interested incolors.
Or if they look at me, I mightsay, Oh, you think that looks
yellow. And so just say backwhat they said to me and make a
mental note that like Next time,I'll be sure to name the blue t

(01:12:46):
shirt as they're getting dressedlater on. Or I'll keep naming
colors as we go about our day.
Or maybe they'd like to startcollecting lots of things around
the home that a yellow but superfun way and like not forcing it
at all. In Montessori, we havean expression I might have
mentioned it before, which islike teach by teaching and not
by correcting. So in this case,our input of repeating at other
times is the teaching and wemake a mental note of the things

(01:13:09):
that they're still working on.
And then we put more input in ina very natural way. And it's
definitely a very, very goodlesson in following the unique
timeline, which is the powerthat one of the hardest things
as a Montessori parent, I wouldsay. So thanks, Eva for that.
And that's all for today,everyone. I hope you keep well,

(01:13:30):
and I'll be back again nextFriday with another episode of
the podcast. We have another funMontessori friend visiting who
most of you would know fromInstagram. I'll be speaking to
Theresa from Montessori in RealLife. And indeed, we'll be
talking all about how they applyMontessori in their home, so you
aren't going to want to miss it.
Until then, everyone.

(01:13:50):
Thanks for joining me for theMontessori notebook podcast. The
podcast was edited by LukeDavies from Flimprov media, a
d podcast asked by Hiyoko ImaiTo find out more about me and
y online courses visit themontesorinotebook.com, follow me on
nstagram at The Montesori Notebook, or pick up a copy
of my book The Montessori toddleor its new prequel The Montesso

(01:14:11):
i Baby from your local bookstor, Amazon or where books are sold
They're also available as ebook, audio books, and have been tra
slated into over 20 language. I'll be back in a week wit
more Montessori inspiraton. And in the meantime
perhaps she'll join me in spreaing some more peace and positivi
y around the world.