Rising Above Trauma: Sumeya's Non Profit Path to Empowerment

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Army Veteran Sumeya Gibril shares her powerful story of founding Rise Above, Be Relentless Foundation, a nonprofit dedicated to supporting military sexual trauma survivors through healing, mentorship, and empowerment.

• Experienced childhood sexual trauma and domestic violence from ages 6-11 before migrating to America
• Started the foundation after witnessing how military sexual assault victims were often blamed while perpetrators faced no consequences
• Foundation provides civilian lawyers for active duty women, mental health support, and financial assistance for domestic violence survivors
• Core pillars include "Sustenance comes from the creator, not people" and "Embrace the suck" to help survivors take control of their healing
• Foundation focuses on helping "people who want to help themselves" rather than those who remain in victim mentality
• Emphasizes thorough vetting of claims to maintain credibility and avoid false accusations
• Upcoming events include a gala on August 20th at Tower Club in Tysons Corner and a golf tournament on September 29th at Belmont Country Club
• Vision to expand nationally and eventually internationally to support women worldwide
• Advises survivors to channel anger productively, recognize their inherent worth, and take back their power

Join us for our upcoming events! The military service gala on August 20th at Tower Club Tysons and our charity golf tournament on September 29th at Belmont Country Club. Visit riseaboveberelentless.betterworld.org to learn more.

Website:Rise Above Be Relentless Foundation - CORE Foundation

Hearts of Valor Gala Tickets:Hearts of Valor Gala Tickets, Wed, Aug 20, 2025 at 5:30 PM | Eventbrite

Hearts of Valor Gala- Sponsorship Opportunity: The Hearts of Valor Gala by Rise Above Be Relentless Foundation | BetterWorld

Golf Tournament Registration: Rise Above Golf Tournament by Rise Above Be Relentless Foundation | BetterWorld


LinkedIn: RISE ABOVE BE RELENTLESS FOUNDATION: Company Page Admin | LinkedIn 
Instagram: Instagram
Tiktok: (11)Rise Above Be Relentless Fdn (@riseaboveberelentlessfdn) | TikTok

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
Warriors fall in.
It's time for formation.
So, folks, welcome to themorning formation.
Today I'm joined with SumeyaGibral, who's joined me before,
actually two other times on thepodcast.
Sumeya is the founder of RiseAbove, be Relentless Foundation,
a nonprofit organization thatis committed to empowering
communities the military sexualtrauma community through healing

(00:23):
, mentorship, relentlessness andself-belief.
With a powerful backstory andan unwavering mission, sumaya's
organization is making wavesthrough the innovative programs,
events and grassrootsengagements that she's coming up
with, and today we're going totalk about a gala that's coming
up in August and a golftournament in September.
Sumaya, thank you for joiningme on the Morning Formation
today.

Speaker 2 (00:44):
Thank you so much for having me again.
Kp Hi Formation Nation.
How are you doing?

Speaker 1 (00:50):
Formation Nation.

Speaker 2 (00:51):
Yeah, I think that should be it.

Speaker 1 (00:53):
That's a new one.
Can I coin that?
The Formation Nation.
I love how, when I'm justhaving a regular conversation,
stuff like that comes up.
I was talking to Tyrone Hewittand earlier and he brought up
how some employers are veteranfriendly but not veteran ready

(01:16):
and I was like I've never heardthat phrase before.
But I think that's so wiseright.

Speaker 2 (01:21):
It is.
You never know what gems peoplehold, you know.

Speaker 1 (01:25):
No doubt I'm so fortunate to have folks like you
in my circle, like straight upyou are a straight up baller.
From learning on our lastepisode where you came from to
where you are now, I mean youreally exemplify girl power, I
mean in every way shape.
It's not something you just say, but you, you walk the walk as

(01:49):
well, and so I'm extremelyfortunate to have you in my
circle and it's great to hearabout your nonprofit that you've
been running.
Can you start off by telling uswhat inspired you to create
Rise Above, Be RelentlessFoundation?

Speaker 2 (02:01):
I started Rise Above Be Relentless Foundation because
I'm a survivor of militarysexual trauma because of sexual
harassment and childhood sexualtrauma from like age 6 to 11,
with domestic violence.
If somebody asked me about mytrauma, I'd be like do you need
a menu?
And I joke about that.
You know, it's a way of coping.
It's a way of coping and I wasjust tired and angry of people

(02:27):
not just getting away with itbut being rewarded, like in the
military.
If you accuse somebody ofsexual harassment, assault, rape
, they'd be like oh yeah, we'regoing to do something about it.
And then this person ispromoted and they're moved to
another location.
And you know, the woman is justeither she loses rank or she's

(02:48):
labeled as this problematicperson.
And it's just and they just.
It just keeps happening andhappening again.
And even in my community, evenin society, instead of like
asking like, hey, are you okay?
They're like no, we sweep thesethings under the rug.
And this is verbatim and itjust made me so angry.

(03:09):
And it's like, even if you sayas a survivor, hey, I'm going to
, like, I'm going to move on now, you know, but all I ask of you
is like hey, ask me how I'mdoing, check up on me.
But communities and societies,they get so uncomfortable they
just rather pretend it didn'thappen and they ignore the signs
, whether you're depressed,stressed or you're feeling

(03:29):
suicidal, as long as you're nottalking about it out loud, they
just kind of cover their ears,cover their eyes.
And then, when you put it outin the front and just kind of
want to talk about it, they dovictim blaming and they protect
the abusers.
It just made me angry.
It made me angry how you knowyou survive this, terrible

(03:52):
things, heinous things, and thenyou have to explain yourself
and you have to hide it.
Just, it didn't make sense tome, even as a kid.
I'm a kid who always, you know,asks why anybody tells me to do
something.
I'm like why?
Why am I doing it?
What's the purpose?
And like, once I've healed fromall this trauma and I have
understood that I'm valuable,just because I exist, you know,

(04:15):
and just because somebody harmedme, it doesn't mean it takes
away from my value, and Istepped back and I was like who
do these people think they are?
So wait, so you're going toabuse me and then for the people
who are not there for me orprotected me, and then you
didn't do your job as a personwho's supposed to be protecting
me, and then, on top of that,you're going to care about what

(04:36):
people will think, or societywill think or community will
think, instead of actual mywell-being if I'm okay as a
person, and instead of making itright, you're just going to be
like, no, let's sweep this underthe rug.
I'm like, I'm angry, I'm upset,I'm tired of it.

(04:57):
I'm like where do they get thisaudacity from to be the abusers
, the negligent individuals?
And then they come back andthey're like you know, make you
feel bad.
You know.
I feel like you should be angrytoo, but channel this anger in
a good way to do something good,which what I'm doing for I'm
using all this anger to do achange, be a force of change and
kind of be like you know what.
I don't have to accept thatNobody's coming to save me, so I

(05:19):
have to save myself.
But yeah, it's just.
I started it because I was justso angry at society, at the
community, and I'm just like I'mnot going to accept that.
I don't think so.
You don't get to get away withit.
You don't get to be rewardedfor it.
I don't think so.
It's just like no.
Yeah, I just started to say noand I'm not going to accept the
scenarios that the media societycommunity is throwing at me.

(05:43):
I just start saying no, and itdoesn't make sense.
It doesn't make sense, I don'tthink so.
So I decided to be moreaudacious and just shift that
shame that they put on survivorsand victims back onto them.
I'm like you should be ashamed.
You're the one who did this act.
You're the one who wasnegligent.
I just got sick of it.
I'm like I don't think so.

(06:04):
I'm like I don't think so.
You know, I'm just like no.
No, that's why I started.
I'm like no, this is just kindof like an act of defiance.

Speaker 1 (06:12):
Taking your power back, I would say in the last
few years military sexual traumathe topic in itself has kind of
gone both ways.
There's been false accusations,there's been false accusations,
there's been real accusations.
The challenge is finding thatfine line between who's telling
the truth and who's not tellingthe truth.

(06:33):
Do you know anyone that's everbeen falsely accused before of
military sexual trauma?
I mean, we've seen it in themedia and stuff right.

Speaker 2 (06:43):
Yeah, so I don't personally know somebody who was
accused falsely, but I've heardof it and, like I have a son,
so it's just I would hate forsomething like that to be to
happen to him and that makes me.
That would scare me.
You know, and like in in myvideo at the at the my
promotional video for thiscampaign, at the end I named the

(07:05):
rapist, the abusers, and youknow two of them are.
One of them name is abd raza,the other one's abd raza khalifa
, but they're both in eritrea.
Like that happened when I was akid, right, not the one in the
states and people thought it waslike it was this person that
said, like that's not him, youknow, and it's not fair to that
person.
And then the one that was here,jamal shumbash, is like he had

(07:26):
a case before and I'm like thisis him, um, but it's just like
it's not fair for people whodidn't do anything, who didn't
harass anybody, who didn'tassault anybody, for their names
to be thrown into a mud because, like my goal is not to be like
us versus them, it's just morelike this is something evil and
men and women need to gettogether to fix it, to stop it.

(07:50):
You know, and it's not fair thatpeople get accused wrongly and
when women or men like accuseindividuals wrongly, unjustly,
it makes it really hard for theactual survivors to be believed,
because it's already hard to bebelieved in a society we live
in.
It just makes it extremelydifficult.
And it's important that we havecredibility.

(08:11):
We are who we say we are, westand behind our words and we're
courageous.
That's what I like to you knowhave a foundation, an
organization.
That is.
Credibility is very important,integrity is very important.
We want to have you know a wayto you know vet individuals who

(08:32):
are saying these things.
So let's say, for example,somebody says this happened to
me, so we're not going to golike you know, we're not in the
rage bait business Right and doyour due diligence.
You know, and if you end upaccusing somebody wrongly, then
you make it right.
So we do our best to be, to becredible and do our due
diligence when these kind ofthings happen.

Speaker 1 (08:53):
We talked about that beforehand, because there are
folks out there that will jumpon the bandwagon early before
there's been any kind ofresearch, any kind of
investigation.
A lot of these folks that areabusers have a track record.
It's not like a one-time thing,it's something that

(09:15):
continuously happens over andover and over again, and I think
that that's important for me tounderline, because military
sexual trauma is something thatI haven't covered, because
there's been so many people thathave been falsely accused in
civilian and military, that havelost their careers by being

(09:35):
falsely accused, and so I'mreally careful about making sure
that I'm not interviewingsomeone that's just jumping on
the rage, on the rage bait, likeyou mentioned, and that's what
I like about what you're doingwith your nonprofit that you are
having some form of like.
All right, let's take a breath,let's take a step back, let's
look at the facts, let's see ifthis is really something that we

(09:58):
really want to get behind,because there have been cases
out there where I've seenpeople's like careers and lives
get ruined over someone else.
That's just malicious.
So I think that's where yournonprofit really is different
from these other influencers andnonprofits out there is that
you understand that there's twosides to this and that you don't

(10:20):
just blindly believe everyonethat makes accusations, and I
just want to make sure that weunderline that.
And the phrase Rise Above, beRelentless.
Why did you come up with thatas a name?

Speaker 2 (10:34):
So when we were preparing for my company,
phoenix Global, shipping like atagline, me and my videographer
were working and we're goingback through my history.
I feel like everything, eventhe company, led to this
nonprofit.
Rise above means rising abovethe hate, you know, the

(10:55):
oppression, the discriminationand just taking charge of your
life because you can experienceharsher like experiences, and
you can come out stronger.
And then being relentless meansthat tough moments are not the
end.
They're just an opportunity toget creative, find like an
alternative path and never giveup Because I found myself in my
life.
I have to rise above a lot ofthings.

(11:17):
Otherwise, if I just stick tosomething like, oh, this person
is being racist to me, thisperson hates me, this person,
I'm not going to get anythingdone.
So I just have to be like okay,yes, this is hurtful, but I
have to move forward because I'mnot in that area in my life
anymore.
I have freedom now.
I have many options.
We're fine, we have moreopportunities.
Let's just focus on that.

(11:38):
And then I'm just kind of likethat one moment.
Those abuses are not definition.
They don't define who you areas a person and you just there
has to be always like you haveto find an alternative path,
otherwise you will lose yourmind, cause you're just like you
know, I'm like.
These things happen for areason, and I might not

(11:58):
understand the reason, but Ijust I have to keep me moving
forward and do something goodout of this evil.
You just I just have to keepmoving forward and do something
good out of this evil.

Speaker 1 (12:08):
You just have to move forward.
It's the only way.
Yeah, that's actually a reallypowerful message in itself is
moving forward, because I knowyour background You're from
North Africa, right East Africa,actually East.

Speaker 2 (12:21):
Africa.

Speaker 1 (12:22):
East Africa.
You're from East Africa, youmigrated to the United States at
a very young age and then youworked for CBP Customs Border
Protection for a little bit andnow you're running your own
international business andculturally culturally, where

(12:45):
you're from a woman running apowerful business is not exactly
ideal, right?
So you mentioned before in theother podcast that you had
difficulties trying to getbusiness because you couldn't
have meetings with men,basically in the Middle East.

(13:05):
Is that right?

Speaker 2 (13:07):
So here's the thing.
Yes, there's the cultural andthere's the religious aspect.
So, islamically, I have all therights in the world.
There's a woman named Khadija,one of the Prophet Muhammad's
wives.
She was a businesswoman, a lotricher than him.
So, just like, islamically, itgives me all the rights I need
to thrive, survive, and anybodywho gets in the way of that,

(13:28):
even if it's your parents,you're not even so.
We put our parents in higherregards, but if they go in any
guide like against guidelines ofthat says, like against women's
rights or anything that'swritten like in our book, you
don't have to listen to them.
So my religion gives me all therights I need, like it empowers
me, that the only reason I'mdoing this is because I get the
courage and empowerment from it.

(13:48):
I get my value from it.
Right, my culture is theopposite.
As much as I respect it, womenare not really women are second
class citizens and unfortunately, people don't practice faith
and you know, sometimes peopleput culture over faith and
that's exactly what happened inthe Middle East.

(14:11):
They're like you're a woman,like they canceled a meeting on
me and I'm just like okay, thenyou're not a person I would like
to work with, you know.
So it's just kind of like it's,you know, it's people's
attitude and it tells a lotabout their character.
So that's why I don't concernmyself.
Besides, like the culturaldresses and the food and stuff,
I don't concern myself with it,I only concern with the right,

(14:35):
the God given rights, that Ihave, and that's what empowers
me to keep going, because that'sthe only thing that matters,
because if it's not there, thenother people's opinion do not
matter.
And that's what keeps me going,because if I looked at culture,
as just in any culture, youknow, I don't think I've seen a
maybe like from the culturesthat I've known where women are
first-class citizens.
So I just try not to payattention to that right.

Speaker 1 (14:59):
Yeah, I just wanted to highlight that because, um, I
think your background a lot ofpeople that are from america,
from here, think that they arebehind the eight ball.
But I mean, you came to america, you migrated here and then you
come from a, a place where itmay be a little more difficult
to break through, um, than it ishere, as far as equal rights

(15:22):
and being like you mentionedlike first citizen and it's like
, um, because there were so manybarriers, you come here.

Speaker 2 (15:29):
I didn't speak any english.
I talk about in my video, abouthow I saw white people for the
first time, like in person, onceI got out of the airport and I
told my mom like look whitepeople.
You know the people on tv, youknow.
So that was very interesting tome.
And then I saw, saw like twocouples kissing.
I was like, oh my God, becausewe come from a very conservative
culture, so it's just a lot ofculture shock.

(15:51):
You know, knowing you knowdifferent language, different
culture, so adapting to that, itwas just, it was very
interesting.
It's definitely characterbuilding.
I was looking at my yearbookfrom high school this morning
and there was a lot of sweetnotes from my teachers and the
students, except one teacher.
I don't know if it's consideredsweet, but I was like what did

(16:14):
I put this man through?
He was like Samaya.
It's been interesting.
I don't know if I will say I'llmiss you, but I'll always
remember you.

Speaker 1 (16:23):
I was like Wow, that's honesty.

Speaker 2 (16:28):
That is honesty I was like.
But like, looking back and I'mlike, with all the trauma that I
had, clearly I was not an easychild or an easy student, you
know.
But in comparison to the otherteachers that were like writing
in the yearbook, they were like,oh, you've grown so much, I
know you're going to do greatthings.
Or like you bring smile to thisroom and it's just.

(16:48):
It shows how different peopleperceive you.
It also shows how, you know,some teachers had the ability to
hold space for students and seethem beyond their trauma,
beyond them acting out, andthere are some others that may
not have the same ability, youknow.
So it's just kind of veryinteresting to see the growth
from that troublemaker to nowthis businesswoman and running

(17:12):
my own nonprofit and having theability to really deeply
understand people when they'regoing through these kind of
things and see them, you know,just see them beyond what
they're presenting, beyond themasks that they're having, and
just be like I understand you,this is not who you are.
I have greater empathy becauseI've been in that shoes where I

(17:33):
was like I was bullied as achild because I was wearing this
cultural dresses I mean, I didnot fit in college was like
where I felt like I said I fitin.
Like the entire middle school,high school, I did not fit in,
you know, I was bullied.
So it was just kind of like itbuilds character, but it was

(17:56):
just kind of on top ofeverything.
It was a really harsh thing tohave, but it's just like it
builds greater empathy to belike.
Oh, I was having like how can?
How did people not notice Likewhat's going on with this child,
did something happen?
But it's OK, I'll be that adultnow to do that for the other
kids, you know, because I wasn'tdone for me.
So that's also like a positivething to look at, you know.

Speaker 1 (18:13):
I can.
I can relate a thousand percentwith you because I grew up.
My childhood was verydomestically, violently, filled
with events and anything fromhaving to call the police
because I'm listening to my momget beat in the next room to
trying to run away myself and Iwas.

(18:35):
I was kicked around a lot and Iwas moved to different schools
quite a bit.
Growing up I had to constantlymake good, you know, new friends
.
I had opportunities to reinventmyself every time I moved.
If I knew I was kind of being,you know, a pain in the ass at
one school, I'd go to the nextschool and try to focus on
studying and getting betterbecause I started maturing.

(18:57):
But I struggled.
I spent nine years up until myfreshman year.
From first grade to freshmanyear I was in special ed and I
finally got embarrassed andtired of it and I tested out of
it.
I was so fortunate to test outof it and I was told by my

(19:18):
guidance counselor that I wasn'tcollege material.
They wouldn't allow me to takecollege classes my junior year
so I can identify like when youhave a broken home and you have
trauma growing up, it's hard tofocus at school and, um, a lot
of teachers don't see that.
All I see is this shithead kidthat's like showing up every day
and is a pain in the ass, butlike, at the end of the day, you

(19:40):
don't know that, that kiddidn't get any sleep last night
and that's it.
That's a whole nother side toit.
So I identify with with whatyou're saying and I also.
For folks out there that arelistening to you for the first
time, this is important too.
Didn't you serve in themilitary?

Speaker 2 (19:55):
I did for a few years in the army yeah, so I did.
I was culinary specialist aftercollege yeah, because they came
to the high school.
I was like, no, what do youthink?
No way.
And then the first semester Iwas walking by and they were
like join the National Guard.

(20:17):
And I wanted my freedom sobadly.
I don't like people telling mewhat to do.
I was like I need to takecontrol of my own life.
So I was like, all right, I'mgoing to go.
I ended up joining the activeduty and, yeah, it was first
semester.
I didn't even finish the firstsemester I was like get me out
of here.
I want freedom, I wantindependence and, you know, a
chance to serve the country.
But once I actually got intobasic and trade, that's when I
was like, ooh, you know serviceand country.

(20:38):
I really like this purpose ofhaving this.
Yeah, I did.
You know what's so crazy?
Before I left one of mybrothers actually I need to
thank him because I didn't thinkI did he was like you're a
woman, you're not going to makeit in the military.

(20:59):
I was like, screw you.
I was like, okay, whatever.
And then I hung up the phonecall and then we were having
like we were doing the underfire training and then, like the
weapon, I was supposed to putit behind your back.
I put it in front of my face, Ismell, and then it was just
like hitting me in my face andwe were like crawling and the

(21:21):
guy was like you know, do youwant to give up?
And then, like, all I couldhear was like you're not going
to make it.
I was like prove him right.
I was like I don't think so.
I was like hit me with thatrifle, you know, and I made it
and it was so funny, or likeanytime I'm like oh, I can't do
this anymore and think of likeoh, there was like a mountain.
I'm like should they're goingto?
So they could be like no, youcan't make it.

(21:42):
I was like, oh, I don't thinkso.
So like just kind of grit andlike anger and be like, oh, so,
like, just like you told me Ican't do it.
Now I definitely have to do it.
It just made me, like you know,go through basic, go through
the army.
So thank you.
You know, bro, that was Ineeded that.
So I appreciate you saying that.

(22:02):
That was really good for me.
So, yeah, I should call him andthank him actually, because
that made it.
That was good.

Speaker 1 (22:09):
Sometimes the naysayers can be your highest
motivation, right.

Speaker 2 (22:14):
I need that, I need the naysayers because something
in my brain flips and I get this, will I get this power?
I don't know where it comesfrom, and then I'll just make it
happen, but I have to careabout the cause.
You know, at that time I caredabout my livelihood, my
independence, my service, and itjust it turned something and I
was just like I just had to doit.

(22:35):
It's like the power of the mind.
No, I appreciate naysayersbecause they keep me, you know,
on my toes and I elevate my gameand I do the best I can be.
So thank you, naysayers,because you're making me do
better.

Speaker 1 (22:47):
So, yeah, there it is I appreciate them, haters.
Yeah, keep them coming yeah,yeah, thank you, haters.
No, I, um, I want to get backto talk about your nonprofit uh,
the core mission pillars of thenonprofit organization.
Would you mind talking aboutthat?

Speaker 2 (23:08):
Yeah, so we have about 12, but one of them is
like so I'm going to give youlike the maybe three that we
really use.
Sustenance comes from thecreator, not people.
This one's very, very importantto me because as a woman, you
know, I find myself insituations with powerful people

(23:30):
where you know you're like askedto compromise your values to
get where you need to be, butthen I have to step back and
I'll be like you know, the moneydoesn't come from you, you're
just a vessel, a means for it.
The resources do not come fromyou, like God will provide us.
I just get into my prayer man,I pray and he, he loves me.

(23:53):
I always joke and I say I'mGod's favorite Cause he doesn't
even make you wait like 24 hours.
There's always something comesup and I get help.
But it allows me.
It allows me to stand by myvalues and then it allows me to
not people put.
Not put people on a pedestal,because I'm like you're just a
human being, you know, and likemy bosses, I'm like okay, I

(24:13):
respect you, but you're not incharge of my livelihood.
So if I leave, I can leave,because everything that's meant
for me is written, so you're notin control of it, so it doesn't
allow people to control me.
Like I'm in charge of my ownlife and it's just I can.
I can walk away.
I've walked away from moneyopportunities even when I needed
it the most.
I was just like I'm trustingyou, please, you know, and he

(24:35):
always comes through.
But it's just kind of like itcreates this kind of confidence
and and like charm and charisma,that and light, once you don't
give people the power to be like, oh, if I, if I don't do this
job, if I don't do this favor,if I don't do what they say,
like I don't know what I'm goingto do, I'm going to be out of a
job, I'm going to be out of ahome.

(24:56):
But there's like that's alsowhere like there's always
another option, go find it.
Like value comes in.
I just there's always otheropportunities, I just don't let
people control me and it's justkind of like so people think as
that, as ego or like standoffish.
I'm like no, it's not.
It's like I respect you andeither you're going to do this
you know, deal, because we havemutual respect with each other

(25:18):
or you're not.
But I'm not going to beg youbecause either you do it or you
don't.
It's fine if you don't.
If you decide not to do it,okay, and they're just like
that's it.
I'm like that's it.
And so the only way I defineego is as long as I'm not
thinking that you know I'm notgiving, uh, god, like as long as
I'm giving God credit, it's notego, that's it.

(25:40):
That's how I look at it, nomatter how people think of it.
And the other one is likeembrace the suck that's the army
, military kind of it's going tobe really sucky.
It's not always sunshine andrainbow and you're going to get
hit in the face.
People will, you know,undermine you and will not treat
you right, and the world is anunfair place.

(26:01):
And you're just going to belike, okay, this sucks and what
else can I do about it, and thenyou'll find another way, it'll
be fine.
It's like, whatever, you know,we're going to go.
And then the other one is likebe willing to suffer Because,
like when I'm telling peoplewith my organization, what makes
us different is like myorganization helps the people

(26:22):
who want to help themselves, youknow.
So if you feel like you're,like I'm going to be in this
victim mode and I'm not going todo anything for myself.
Woe is me, but I'm like, okay,but when you're ready, you know,
give me one second Like.
If you're saying, hey, woe isme and nothing like you know
this, the world, like the worldhappened to me I'm going to be

(26:42):
like, okay.
But when you're ready to sayI'm going to take charge of my
own life you know, these peopleare not going to control my life
I can make you know, I can take, you know, charge of my own
destiny Then we will be readyfor you with the tools, with the
financial assistance, with thepartners, to be able to help you
.
We'll be there for you.

(27:03):
This is for people, survivors,who are ready to take charge of
their own life, who are ready totake charge of their own life,
who are willing to suffer for it.
Because when you're speaking up, when you're daring to say this
person did this to me, it does.
It takes risk, it could riskyour life, it could risk your
future, it could risk yourcareer.
This is for people who arewilling to take the risk to be

(27:23):
like.
You know, these people are notin charge and I'm in charge.
I could do it like, I can makethis happen and, of course, we
want them to do it.
We want to make sure thatthey're in a safe space to be
able to do these things and wecan help them get to that place.
But we want them to have thatmindset they can save themselves
and that suffering is part ofthe process to get to where you

(27:44):
need to be.
So those are like key valuesthat we have, pillars.

Speaker 1 (27:50):
All very military-related pillars, right,
because that's kind of the baseof your foundation when you, I
guess, joined adulthood.
At a young age, you joined themilitary and probably a very
eye-opening experience for youand I want to ask you this
question because I'm not surebut have you, have you spoken to

(28:14):
or experienced like we've beentalking about women specifically
but has any men talked aboutmilitary sexual trauma before to
you?

Speaker 2 (28:25):
No, unfortunately not .
They talked to me about likecivilian life experiences, but
they have not.
You know, I'm glad you askedthat question because when I
went to SHARP and SARP to talkto them about this they're like
we also serve men.
So because you're only servingwomen and children, you know
that might be in conflict,because then you're not solving

(28:48):
all of our demographics.
Don't get me wrong, I love men,I respect men.
It's just our organization onlyserves women and children, male
or female, it doesn't matter.
So I have not had men come tome and say this has, because you
know we're at the beginning ofour journey.
They might come and then, ifthey do, then we'll refer them
to partner organizations who canhandle these kind of uh cases,

(29:13):
you know, because everybodydeserves help.
It's just everybody has to dowithin their own ability and
within their own mission,organizational mission yeah, and
I could see some peoplecriticizing that.

Speaker 1 (29:24):
Um, but, like you just mentioned, you have to stay
within your own wheelhouse withwhat you understand so do it
right right like it would behard for you to identify,
possibly on what that would belike for for a male.
Um one of my first episodes Iwas talking to my dad and he

(29:44):
told me a story about when hewas a drill sergeant and this
was back in like 1978.
And when he was a drillsergeant um one male, um soldier
I don't know, is that the rightterm Soldier?

Speaker 2 (29:59):
Yeah, soldier.

Speaker 1 (30:02):
And I'm just thinking I'm getting confused with
Marines, because Marines theycall them candidates or whatever
.

Speaker 2 (30:07):
Army soldier, yeah, soldier.

Speaker 1 (30:09):
I assume you're a soldier when you're in basic
training, but it was an armyprivate in training or whatever
you want to call it hadsodomized another male, and this
is back in 1978.
And I just it probably doesn'thappen.
It obviously doesn't happen asmuch as you know men to women.
It probably doesn't happen.
It obviously doesn't happen asmuch as you know, men to women.
But I would imagine there'sspecific groups out there that

(30:31):
would better be able to defineand understand people men that
have gone through that before.
So that makes sense that you'restaying within your lane,
within your wheelhouse, withwhat you understand and focused
on the community that you mostlyidentify with.
So I just wanted to throw itout there because while you were

(30:51):
talking I was thinking aboutthe people that you serve.
But can you talk aboutspecifics on what type of
support systems or services thatyou currently offer?

Speaker 2 (31:03):
So before we get to that, I want to just add to the
last thing about men Most peoplewho are criticizing.
If you want that organization,so bad, go create it yourself.
You know like people criticizeand I'm like I want to change
for myself and the community.
I've created the organizationYou're in the sideline
criticizing me.
Get up, I can refer you.

(31:23):
Let me know how to go.
We're under a core foundation.
They're fiscally responsiblefor us.
You can go open a cause withthem and they're more than happy
to help you, you know.
So it's just like don'tcriticize from the sidelines.
Go out and do the work yourself, you know, and do the fight for
the causes you're passionateabout.
So it doesn't mean that wedon't want to help men.
We're going to refer them tothe right people, but this is

(31:43):
what we, this is the causes thatwe are passionate about, and
we're doing something about it.
You also get up, do somethingabout it.

Speaker 1 (31:50):
Right, but it's so much easier to criticize and
like, just type stuff into theinternet and be a keyboard
warrior, you know what I mean?
Like it's so much easier.
It's so much easier to liketalk about something else versus
you getting off your butt andcreating something else, and
that's just.
That's just the way the worldis.
That's just the way it is.

Speaker 2 (32:08):
And that's why not everybody's opinion matters.
Something said a, bernie Brownsays those who are um, I'm
bangling this quote but thepeople who matter are the ones
with you in the arena, not likein the sidelines.
Those are the people who arewhose opinion matters, and you
should take into consideration,not people in the stage booing

(32:28):
or woohooing.
Now, if you're in the arenawith me and we're working
together and you're telling mesomething, then your opinion is
valuable because you're doingsomething about it.
Then I'll take your opinion.
But I can't take everybody'sopinion, especially if you're
not doing anything about it.
I'm like go do somethingproductive.
You know everybody has freewill.
Go do something about it, youknow, and just keep it out of my

(32:51):
comment section.

Speaker 1 (32:52):
Yeah, I could.
I could go down that rabbithole so much, because that
extends to even family and closefriends.
Sometimes they don't understandwhat it is you're doing, but as
long as you know what you'redoing, that all that really
matters.

Speaker 2 (33:07):
And then the services .
What was that?

Speaker 1 (33:09):
yeah, so the telling to that question was talking
about the specific services orthe support systems.
That, uh, that you offer thankyou, kp.

Speaker 2 (33:16):
Yes, the services that we want to offer is because
our charity kickoff we have twokickoffs the august 20th gala
and september 29th golftournament, which we'll talk
about later.
The services we want to offeris for active duty women.
We want to provide themcivilian lawyers who could help
them pro bono, which will payfor the lawyers, because when
you accuse somebody, like wementioned, of sexual assault,

(33:39):
rape or domestic violence, thewalls of the military can close
in on you, you can lose rank andyou could just be you, you know
this black sheep of themilitary.
So we want them, we want us tobe their first line of defense.
Where they're like thishappened to me, what do I do?
And then we connect them with amilitary lawyer.
We'll connect them with ourpartners you know mental health

(34:02):
specialists, but we'll connectthem with the civilian lawyers
who are familiar with the UCMJand then let them, you know,
walk them through what they needto do, what the right thing is,
so that they could avoid makingmistakes, so they don't find
themselves in a position where,you know, because the military
is the judge, jury andexecutioner, because they have
their own, you know, they havetheir own system and we want

(34:23):
these women to be protected.
So one of the services is thelawyers.
And then for domestic violenceand for the child.
For the children is you knowthe special, the mental health
help they need.
And for the domestic violence,let's say you know the mother
and the child are both dealingwith domestic violence or sexual
trauma and the woman is likeready to move with her kid.

(34:45):
We'll be like, ok, we're goingto help you pay subsidies three
to six months for childcare andwe're going to help you pay your
utility bills.
We're going to connect you withthis mental health person and
thankfully, if they are, youknow, military and veterans, we
have Act Now education.
We could be like these peopleprovide you resources and
education and jobs.
So we'll connect them with thepeople they need to do.
But the important thing aboutour organization is that we

(35:07):
provide financial help and wedon't pay it directly to the
individual.
We pay it to the organizations.
That is helping them, yeah.

Speaker 1 (35:16):
And I'm so glad that you mentioned Act Now Education,
because you've been aninstrumental figure in Act Now
Education with helping producethe newsletter, and I think it's
important for us out there toreach out and network but have
those resources, because now,samaya, you, you have the

(35:36):
contacts, so if your folks needhelp you can, you know directly
where to go, how to get there,and you're not just throwing
them like an internet link andsaying click on this and figure
it out.
I mean, you're intimatelyinvolved in that and I love that
part about you.
We talked about that a fewmonths ago and you've been
absolutely, as they say, leaningforward in the foxhole with

(35:58):
heading off, you know, at realcommunity help and that's
absolutely amazing.

Speaker 2 (36:05):
That's absolutely amazing, thank you.
Thank you for the referral forme to work with ACNA Education.
I love volunteering for them.
They do great work for thecommunity, so it's really good
to have a yeah, because they'reall volunteers.

Speaker 1 (36:32):
So, for the amount of work they do and the dedication
, just they motivate me to domore.
So it's really nice.
I didn't want to give you timeto thank me for that, because
it's really not me, it's you, um.
At the end of the day, I'verecommended things to people
before and they just simplydon't listen.
The fact is is that you arelike it's on you 100 percent, um
, you've actually been been areal instrumental gear in the
entire machine of what we'vebeen doing with Agno Education.

Speaker 2 (36:52):
Thank, you very much.

Speaker 1 (36:55):
I understand that you have a couple of events coming
up as you prep for the charitykickoff.
What successes have you had sofar?
Oh my goodness, what successeshave you had so far?

Speaker 2 (37:08):
Oh, my goodness, this organization.
I was like this idea.
I've been having this idea foryears but I put it to action
this April and we've got aboutsix big corporate partnerships,
seven local business.
The seventh one is seven totalbig partnerships that we're
having where they're sponsoringour foursomes for the golf

(37:29):
tournament, the gala.
We already got like a fewsponsors and they're just,
they're quick, they were justlike.
They're like yeah, I'm in andit's just kind of like the
foursomes, a thousand dollars,it's not, you know that's, it's
affordable, it's affordable,reasonably priced.
Um, to other people's opinion,but you know it's not, it's not
just.
You know it's hard, hard earned.
You know income, that peopledon't just throw their money and

(37:52):
time.
So the fact that they believein me, they believe in this
mission, as soon as they hear itthey're like yeah, what do I
know?
Like, what do I do?
What can I do to help you?
So they just sign up and thenit's so crazy because they're
just so supportive and I feellike I'm constant state of flow,
like I love my company, likeHenex, and it's like I've had a

(38:15):
lot of hurdles with it.
But I started Rise Above, youknow, preparing for this kickoff
in April and I've never seen somuch support Everything just
flows like water, like the riverin Egypt.
Support Everything just flowslike water, like the river in
Egypt, and it's so.
It feels so, so easy and itmakes me recognize how good

(38:40):
people are and as much asbacklash I receive from my
community for talking about thispublicly and doing this, blah,
blah, blah.
The amount of support I'mgetting it's out of this world
like big corporation companies,businesses, military, like it's
crazy and it's just.
I think the biggest success,more than the money and the
sponsorship, is just a renewedfaith in humanity.
There's so many people willingto fight this evil.

(39:03):
There's so many people who arekind, who are passionate, but
it's just kind of like it showsyou, wow, like people are, you
know, can be this beautiful,gorgeous, successful, but then
they also have their own storythey want to share and they also
feel seen and it's just.
I've seen so many people wherethey're like they feel seen,

(39:23):
they want to be a part of it.
I've never seen something likethis.
It's just, it's people fromdifferent backgrounds.
I never felt more connected.
I never felt more successful,like people-wise.
It feels everything is coming soeasy.
It's not effortless, but itfeels easy.

(39:47):
It feels like this is what I'msupposed to do.
It feels very successfulbecause it brings people
together.
It's like hope, survivors, likeyou're not alone.
Don't listen to the people whoare on your ears, the negative
ones, making you think like it'syour fault, because it's not,
you know you.
Just they don't want you to bepowerful and passionate and take

(40:09):
charge of your own life.
And yeah, and just other timesthey're just.
They're scared too, you know,because that they have to face
the fact that they werenegligent yeah so it's just,
it's the people.
That was a successful part, howit brought people together and
continues to bring peopletogether.

Speaker 1 (40:26):
Life be that way, man .
Like when people see otherpeople doing things that's
foreign to them and they'reglowing up and moving up and
making progress.
I don't know what it is, man.
I feel like other people canjust be become haters, like even

(40:46):
some of your closest friendsand family, people you would not
even suspect.
And I want to comment on whatyou mentioned.
You know, the product that yousee today isn't necessarily,
isn't necessarily, somethingthat was beautiful once before,

(41:06):
isn't necessarily something thatwas beautiful once before.
I mean, talk about yourchildhood and the trauma that
you dealt with growing up versusthe powerful, beautiful
entrepreneur woman that you aretoday.
Life wasn't always like this.
It wasn't always this beautifuldress and things like that.
Even for me, people see whatI'm doing and they think, they
assume, that I had a great lifegrowing up and it wasn't

(41:29):
terrible.
But I had strong points andit's very weak points.
Um, you know, going to war andall these things that I had to
go through, um, it hasn't beeneasy.
It's.
It's.
It's been a lot of resiliency,um, and it's.
I think it's beautiful thatthat, that you have seen that
and witnessed that through thestories that you have

(41:49):
encountered on this journey ofhaving this nonprofit, and I
think that just underlines thatso much.
How do you go about identifyingand recruiting individuals for
mentorship or any of the supportprograms that you have?

Speaker 2 (42:06):
You mean, like, the people who are going to help, or
the people like in my committeethat's making this happen.

Speaker 1 (42:11):
I think it's important to talk about the
people that are helping you out.
How do you find your circle?
Because it's you know, you'reonly as strong as the people
next to you, right?

Speaker 2 (42:21):
Yes.
So it has its trials andtribulation.
So some of them they find me,others I find, and others they
refer to me and you know some ofthem because they had a story
of you know, you know, domesticviolence, or or others are like,
they want to be a part of it,where they want to help you know

(42:42):
and be like you know what Iwant to be part of this change.
You know and be like you knowwhat I want to be part of this
change, and some of them are,you know, just like, who
appreciate the bold action thatwe're taking, and they're like,
yeah, I want to be a part ofthat.
So it's just a.
It's a mix of survivors, allies, supporters.
It's really like I have areally great team, you know, and

(43:06):
they just, they just want they,they want to, they want to be a
part of it.
They want to do great things.
They see we're doing greatthings and they're just like
what can we do?
And they're really hard workers.
I wouldn't be able to do thiswithout them.
So it's very, yeah, they'reit's a mix, it's a mix and uh,
and I love it, I love my team Itruly believe that intuition and
I truly believe that things andpeople happen for a reason.

Speaker 1 (43:30):
Like even my connection with you started out
with you taking advantage of aprogram that Act Now Education
was offering, and I wanted youto share your story, and it's
led to two additional podcasts.
And it's led to you having yourown business, your own
international business.

(43:50):
Let's talk about that right.
And now you're starting thisnonprofit.
So you know, your circle justgets bigger and more quality the
more you put yourself out there, and I do believe that things
happen for a reason.

Speaker 2 (44:05):
Definitely, and then like the gala as well, like, uh,
I just wanted to say somethings about it.
So the gala is going to beaugust 20th, wednesday, from 5
30 pm, at 8 to 8 30 pm at thetower club, tyson's, and so this
gala is like specifically goingto be you know, all the funds

(44:27):
we raise is going to be for theactive duty women and veterans
that we have, and then for thepeople that are coming in like
so they can expect to have, youknow, food, drinks, enjoy
themselves, good music, and then, because we have sponsorship
opportunities, we're going tohave, like people from different

(44:47):
backgrounds, like businesses,government, military, so people
you want your business to behighlighted.
Then you get, you know, a bannerfor your business, you get a
great company, you get greatnetworking opportunity, all
while supporting a cause thatyou know makes a profound impact
on the lives of veterans, womenand children and active duty
members.
So it's just kind of like avery it helps both of you, it

(45:10):
helps our organization and thenit also helps you, you know,
with your, whatever businessyou're doing or or mission
you're set on like, there's aperfect opportunity to mix and
mingle with differentbackgrounds.
So it's pretty exciting.

Speaker 1 (45:26):
Yeah, and so attendees can expect to do a lot
of socializing, a lot ofnetworking, at this event.
You know why did you.

Speaker 2 (45:34):
We have speakers as well.
We're going to have a fewspeakers as well.
That's my plan.
So maybe at least two, three.

Speaker 1 (45:38):
Okay, and you chose the Tower Club for this venue.
What exactly does that settingsymbolize?

Speaker 2 (45:47):
So the Tower Club.
It's so amazing Because when I,they were my first sponsors for
the golf tournament.
So we have a general manager,dane, dane Scott, and I went up
to him and I was like I want ameeting.
And he was like, okay, I havean event coming up and I want to

(46:09):
discuss it with you.
He was like sure, and he waslike very quick.
And I was like this is what I'mtrying to do.
I'm trying to do this for themilitary community.
This is a golf tournament and Iwant your sponsorship, just
like that.
You know, he just looked at mefor a moment and he's like okay,

(46:29):
and then he's like because andhe was like he's like you know,
the tower club is like reallyproud to support you know
they're because it's a noblecause.
They love the militarycommunity because there's a lot
of active duty and retired youknow members there and he feels
like you know the sacrifice forthey make for our freedom is
great.
So he's's just like.
He's like I'm in, you know hedecides to.
He's like, yeah, I'm going tosponsor you.

(46:51):
This is so crazy becauseliterally my first sponsor.
I'm just going to him and I'mlike, yeah, I'm an under core
foundation, our fiscal sponsor,and I have this mission and I
want to help my militarycommunity and civilians, so I
need your sponsorship.
Like this is a big corporate.
They've been in business forlike I don't know more than 40,
40 years and I'm coming to himand I've been a member for like

(47:12):
a year and a half and I'm liketelling him my mission and he's
like I'm in, I was like you'rein, I'm just like, but I was
like don't act.
Surprised.
I was like, oh, thank you, youknow, and also it's elegant and
classy, it's like business cluband it's just it's first, it's

(47:32):
like the people, second, it'slike his belief in me and then
just the area is really nice.
I like I like to do you know,serve good causes while looking
elegant and having fun.
And where is that at?
This is in Tyson's Corner.

Speaker 1 (47:47):
Okay, it's in DC area .

Speaker 2 (47:48):
Yeah, tyson's, I think the address is let me see,
should we put it later orshould we say something now?

Speaker 1 (47:54):
We can say something now for folks listening out
there If you're from the DC, ifyou're from the DC area, Let me
look at that yeah.
It's so frustrating sometimeswhen I'm on Instagram or listen
to a podcast and somebody callsout the name of somewhere and
I'm like what city is that in?
Is that even in my time zone?

Speaker 2 (48:12):
It is.
Yes, it's not in your time zone.
Here it is.
The address is 8000 TowerCrescent Drive, suite 1700,
vienna, virginia, and it'scalled the Tower Club Tysons and
for members they can get it onthe Invited app.
For non-members, there's anEventbrite link which I will
send to you so you can sharewith your people with the

(48:34):
Formation Nation, formationNation, formation Nation.
But you know what's so crazyabout Dane?
He's like so all my life I gotthis good because people
undermining me and just kind oflike I had to fight for
everything.
Nobody gave me anything.
I just have to be like, I haveto go and take it.
You know.
So with him he just he justbelieved in me.

(48:58):
You know, he's just like like Ibelieve in you.
And here you go, like he, hebelieved in me, he didn't
undermine me, he wasn't sexist,he wasn't because, mind you, he
knows I'm a new golfer, like Istarted golfing a year and a
half ago and I was like you knowwhat?
Golfing is open for everybodyand I want a charity cause.
So I want to do golf tournamentbecause I can and nobody can

(49:19):
tell me nothing.
And then you know, I'm comingto him and tell him this is my
cause and he's just like, yeah,I support you.
And it's just like, wow, thisis my cause.
And he's just like, yeah, Isupport you.
And it's just like, wow, thisis really nice Because I'm a
person who's like, literallylike whether it's undermining,
you know, bullying.
I come from space andexperiences where it's just,
it's not easy, nothing is easy.
And for him to just be like,yeah, I believe in you and to

(49:41):
see, to be seen you know theysay to be loved is to be seen.
You know, or to be seen is tobe loved it's just it feels like
I felt seen and he just, youknow, like he was just like,
yeah, I believe in your missionand what you're going to do.
I see who you are and it's justI felt like, I felt seen and

(50:02):
he's just, he just believed inme and that that creates
something, you know, that bringsloyalty.

Speaker 1 (50:09):
A lot of confidence.
A lot of confidence, too, right.

Speaker 2 (50:12):
Yeah, because they're saying, like the Tower Club is
sponsoring the Rise Above BeRelentless Foundation.
They're not just hosting thefundraiser, they're hosting the
fundraiser and they'responsoring the golf tournament,
they're doing both.
So it's like very, it's a lotof confidence and it's really
inspiring.
So it's like very, it's a lotof confidence and it's really
inspiring and it's just kind oflike my God, there is good
people Like I don't have to jumpthrough hoops for, you know,

(50:36):
for somebody to be like, yeah, Ibelieve in your cause, and to
see my work, ethics and just myenergy and my goals, and just to
be like, yeah, I trust you, andit's just kind of like really
glad to be a part of that.
And I know he's going to liketake this club in a really,
really great direction becauseyou know he's he goes for, he
supports the underdog and Iappreciate that.

Speaker 1 (50:58):
So those were I think , at the end of the day, the
important part is you and the,and what I mean by that is you
are trusted and your heart is inthe right place because you are
doing work for anothernonprofit.
You're very authentic and youcan put a brand on anything but

(51:21):
who's running it.
I think that's the mostimportant thing out there.
I think that's the mostimportant thing out there, and
it sounds like you're on yourway to building a very
incredible, trusted communityBecause, like I mentioned
earlier in the podcast, there'sa lot of mistrust, especially
with the MST space.
Bringing back truth and honestyand authenticity is absolutely

(51:43):
important, because I've seen toomany folks out there in the
last few years, just like youmentioned earlier the rage bait,
the click bait, whatever youwant to call it.

Speaker 2 (51:52):
Cancel culture.

Speaker 1 (51:54):
Cancel culture and it's like yo.
Let's bring this back toserious conversation and stop
looking for clicks.
Let's really help people thatneed help and don't accuse
people that have done absolutelynothing wrong.
And that's what I reallyappreciate about your nonprofit.
Now the proceeds for that galawhere are they going

(52:14):
specifically?

Speaker 2 (52:15):
So they're going to go specifically for the active
duty and veteran woman.
It's going to be specificallyfor the military.
This gala is specifically forthe military.
The golf tournament is for bothmy non-proc for the military
community and the civiliancommunity, but the gala,
specifically this one, is amilitary service gala.

Speaker 1 (52:38):
Got it.
And for folks out there whocan't attend the gala but they
want to still support the cause,how can they do that?

Speaker 2 (52:48):
so the people who cannot attend the cause, the
events they can still support bydonating.
We appreciate it and thesponsorship they can sponsor us.
We'll put their company logo inthere.
You don't even have to show up.
We share the events on socialmedia.
Do outreach on our behalf.
Try to get as many veterans andmilitary community to the gala

(53:08):
and the tournament.
We would love that.
Just create social media buzzand you know, and just more than
that, just maybe have thistough conversations with your
family members.
You know maybe there might be alot of them who this happened
to and they didn't come forward.
But just let them know thatyou're going to be a listening

(53:34):
ear and that you're not going tojudge and that you know you're
sorry that you weren't there.
Because one of the things Iwant to make clear is like there
are families and friends who,at the time, with all this, you
know heinous things arehappening, we're not there for
you, Okay, but now they wantthey, they regret it, Right, and
now they're saying, hey, I wishI would, I could have done

(53:54):
something.
And if you're a parent or asibling or a friend saying, well
, I wish I was there for thisperson, I made mistakes and you
regret that.
Now is your chance to be withthese individuals, have these
conversations, not shy away fromthem, and just be like I'm
sorry I wasn't there for you,but I can be here for you now.
So that's the only way to makeit up for them, Just saying like

(54:15):
I'm here for you, so that'ssomething you could do for us.
More than money.
It's just be there for thepeople who need you and show
them that you have their backand that you support them and
feel free to donate at the sametime as well.

Speaker 1 (54:33):
Let's also mention, too, the social media.
I think sometimes justsubscribing and adding yourself
to Rise Above, Be Relentless, isimportant too.
What social medias are you on?

Speaker 2 (54:45):
So I'm on Instagram, TikTok, Facebook.
I'm going to have to addFacebook and then so we're
Instagram, TikTok and LinkedInas well.
And yeah, just add, subscribe,engage with the content, share
our posts and our stories.
That would really help us go alittle bit further.

(55:06):
So we really appreciate youbecause we this is not my
organization, it's ourorganization because this is
something we're doing forsociety, so we need everybody to
be involved in this cause.

Speaker 1 (55:18):
So, may, what do you think your long-term vision for
the Rise Above Be RelentlessFoundation is going to be over
the next five to ten years?

Speaker 2 (55:25):
of course, international.
You know me, kp, I don't doanything small.
So right now we're in the dmvbasis, in the dmv area, um, but
anybody who needs our help,we're not going to deny them
services.
But you know, we want to gofrom, like the local area that
we're in.
We're going to go national andafter that international.
You know we might have likedifferent subdivisions, but I

(55:47):
want to make this.
You know, eventually, yeah,we're dealing with, you know,
assault, rape and domesticviolence now, but down the line,
you know, we might get intohuman trafficking.
You know it's just kind of likeI want to make changes on a
global basis.
I've always been a global child, you know, raising global kids.
So I'm always my businesses andnonprofits are always going to

(56:08):
be eventually going to end upbeing global, because it's not
just the women that are inAmerica that are dealing with
this.
It's women in Egypt, women in,you know, different parts of
Africa and Asia.
Like they need us.
So we can do it if we have theability.
Like why not?
This is a cool initiative.

Speaker 1 (56:27):
I need to underscore your background again, because
you are from East Africa.
You are a military veteran, youdid work for CBP.
So when you're talking aboutthe trafficking part of it, I
mean you had some insight intothat during your time working
with Custom Border Protectionright during your time working
with Custom Border Protection,right.
How do?

Speaker 2 (56:50):
you stay grounded talking about such an
emotionally charged issue?
Okay, great question.
So I did call back my therapistto go through this journey
because it's like I'm talkingabout it publicly, it's in my
face 24-7 7.
I'm thinking about it all thetime because I like I have to
help this person.
I have to do this.
So a lot of prayers, a lot ofmeditation exercise I exercise

(57:13):
at least four to six times aweek um, friendships, uh, and
just kind of like also puttingin boundaries, because a lot of
people are going to haveunsolicited opinions.
I had a guy from the communitycall me and says hey, I saw the
video and I'm like and you know,and what do you want me to do
with that information?
He was just like oh, it's notgood for our community.

(57:35):
Like you know, people are goingto think we have rapists here.
I'm like we do.
That's the whole point.
You know, if you want us to bemediators, I'm like it already
happened and I'm like this isnot me doing a video to announce
to people oh, I was assaulted.
This is me showing courage,encouraging others to come

(58:00):
forward and then creating anorganization to help them.
So I was like, if you're trulya Muslim person, like you said,
god fearing person, then I wouldbe surprised if you could stand
behind me in this organization,actually provide help.
And he was like, yeah, ofcourse we're going to help.
And then he's like I have to go.
I'm like, ok, have a good day.
Of course he didn't help andstill talk to other people about
it.
But it's just.
Those are the kind of peopleI'm just kind of like.
I have to stand firm, standgrounded, and I'm just like

(58:23):
either you help or you step out.
You know, get out of my way,don't stand in my way.
And then anger.
Anger really helps, you know,whenever I'm like feeling like
this, I'm like get angry,remember the mission, and I'm
just like, all right, I'm backto, ready for the fight.
And it helps, you know.
So a lot of exercise,meditation, prayer, therapy.
Friends, you need a community,you need a lot of community,

(58:46):
social life.
That's a must.
It's a very heavy, it's verydark, it's very dark social life
.

Speaker 1 (58:53):
What's that?
No, I'm just kidding.
For anyone out there that might, who may be struggling, what
advice would you give them tostart rising above and becoming
relentless?

Speaker 2 (59:06):
Okay.
So thank you for that question.
Right now, if you're a survivorI like to say a survivor, not
victim, because victim you'relike somebody's victim.
You're not somebody's victim?
Okay, you survive, you thrive,you're an overcomer and you rise
above the things that happen toyou.
So if you're a survivor, itcould have happened today, it
could happen yesterday, it couldhappen decades ago.

(59:28):
Of course, the obvious feelingsare something's wrong with me.
I feel damaged, I'm unworthy.
It's my fault, it's not.
That's the first thing.
Like it's hard to believe.
But just keep telling yourbrain it's not and you might get
suicidal thoughts, you might be, you know, end up in not a
really good relationships,abusive relationships.

(59:49):
I just need you to step backand think like, okay, I know
this is what my brain is tellingme and I'm taking all this
blame in my head and I'm makingeverything my fault.
These are the feelings andthey're valid, but they're not
true.
I'm worthy just because I exist, you know, because we're here

(01:00:11):
for a reason and no one personcould determine our worth or
that could determine our worth.
And then I want you to getangry.
Be angry, because that willkeep you from spiraling into
this depression and things likethat.
Be angry.
Be angry so that you could be aforce of change for yourself
first, before you could be aforce of change for other people

(01:00:33):
, and be audacious.
Be audacious because the peoplewho are either the abusers, the
perpetrators, the people whoare supposed to protect you, who
don't protect you, they'reaudacious, they're going to
blame you, they're going to makeyou feel guilty.
Where do they get that audacityfrom?
Like I'm trying to understand.
Like ask yourself I'm likethey're in the wrong and they're
making you feel guilty.

(01:00:54):
Like be angry at that and thenjust be bold and just be be a
bitch, like you know.
Just be like I don't think so,excuse my language, say no back.
Like just be like who do youthink you are?
Like make them feel the shame,not you, because you didn't do
anything.
You really did not do anything.
So anger does keep you going,but just make sure you have,

(01:01:14):
like, a good outlet.
Be angry first and then gethelp.
Reach out to me there's so manymental health resources and as
soon as our charity kickoff, youknow, because I didn't have a
foundation for me when I wasgoing through this, but I
created a foundation for thenext girl, for you, for the next
child.
So I'm here to be a listeningear.
I'm here to support youwhatever you need.

(01:01:35):
The organization here is tosupport you whatever you need.
So if you're scared to leavelike a domestic violence
situation, we're here.
We're going to be the strengthyou need.
Until you can give that strengthto yourself, you have a
community here who's not goingto judge you, who's going to
support you.
We're here.
We're going to be here so thatyou're protected and you're
loved and you're cared for.
You're not alone.

(01:01:57):
Just know that you're worthyand nobody has the right to
treat you in a terrible manner.
Nobody has the right to takeanything away from you that does
not belong to them.
And just remember they shouldbe ashamed, be angry at that and
that will give you anger as avery, very powerful emotion that
will get you up from your bedand want to break things.

(01:02:18):
I like to go to smash rooms, sogo ahead and break things there.
Just channel it out.
But just you know you're notalone anymore.
That's why this foundation isexisting so that you don't feel
like you're alone, you're notscared.
If you're scared of leavingthat abusive husband, you got
help here because you're notalone.
We're in your community.
If you're scared of comingforward, we're here.
You're not alone.
You're not alone anymore.

(01:02:39):
That's why we're here.
So just remember that you'renot alone.
It's not your fault.
Be angry and stand up foryourself and be audacious and be
bossy and be bitchy.
Do whatever you need to dolegally to heal from this, to
get yourself up from the floorand to stand up for yourself,

(01:03:02):
because you have to saveyourself, and then we'll help
you get to where you need to be.

Speaker 1 (01:03:09):
That's what I would like to say.

Speaker 2 (01:03:12):
Samia, what's a smash room?
That might be a.
It's a rage.
It's a smash room.
Let me clarify so.
It's not something dirty.
People think something dirtySmash room is where you go.
It's a rage room I should have.

Speaker 1 (01:03:27):
They have those over there.

Speaker 2 (01:03:28):
Yeah, we have rage rooms.
So where you go, it's so funnyyou have like old computers, you
get like just unused printers,you get things like household
stuff, plates, and just get, getthem up and just break them and
then they give you like hammersto break it with them.
They give you bats, like youget to like raging music or

(01:03:52):
whatever music you want tolisten to.
That's a business.
Oh, that's a whole business.
People have a lot of anger.
I'm trying to tell you, andit's so, so fun, and you just
like picture the person youdon't like like print it out,
you know, picture, print out theabuser and put it in there and
just feel like you're smashingthem, like in that smash room,
like in the rage room.
You'll feel so much better.
And if you can't afford that,get, like you know, kitchen

(01:04:15):
plates and smash those outside,like you know.
Those are really good ways ofoutlets.
But there's so many, so manyways, so many ways to let this
go, let it out of your system.
And the other thing I want totell them is like secrets held
in the body, will you know,manifest in the body in a form
of sickness.

(01:04:35):
So when you hold the shame,when you hold the secrets.
When you hide this trauma anddo not say anything, you will
probably feel neck pain, backpain, other issues.
So let it out, so you couldfree yourself.
First, let it out, that's thefirst step.
Let it out, free yourself fromit, because it's not your shame
to carry, and then you will rise, you'll shine, you'll be this
amazing person and the world isyour oyster.

(01:04:58):
Really.

Speaker 1 (01:04:58):
I really wasn't thinking smash room in that
sense, but I wanted to, becausenot every area has that.
I've never heard of that before.
That's a real business.
I mean it's a good idea.
I mean it sounds cool.
It reminds me of office space,that scene where they go out in
the middle of the field and theydestroy that printer, whatever
it was.
I mean that was such a cleverscene, it was before its time.

(01:05:21):
So, man, your passion andpurpose and persistence is truly
inspiring and I absolutely lovethe work that you're doing and
I I really appreciate, um, likeI mentioned before, the
authenticity and the honestythat you're bringing back to
this issue, because I thinkthat's really important, um,
these last few years, the thingsthat we've gone through and the

(01:05:42):
people that have been wronglyaccused and the people that
really needed help but haven'tbeen heard.
Just to round out the podcastWas there anything that I didn't
mention on this show that youwant to mention now before we
finish off?

Speaker 2 (01:05:55):
Yeah, the golf tournament, so we mentioned that
a little bit.
The golf tournament isSeptember 29th right.

Speaker 1 (01:06:01):
Okay.

Speaker 2 (01:06:01):
We got a lot of golfers so far, but we want a
little bit more.
So come join us.
Sign up for a golf foursome soit's literally $2.50 per person.
So bring your other threefriends you know to come play
with you.
This is just a fun game it'snot competitive and enjoy
yourself there.
And then, once you do afoursome, you get to sponsor

(01:06:21):
your company logos, signs andeverything.
You get to network with reallyimportant and successful
individuals.
It's a really good opportunityto serve the military community.
Just show up, sign up tovolunteer.
We would love to have you thereand this is going to be at
Belmont Country Club on Monday,september 29th.

Speaker 1 (01:06:43):
Cool, yeah, that sounds like.
It sounds like when you couldsmash golf balls down the uh,
down the fairway right yes.

Speaker 2 (01:06:51):
So golf you have to be like, like relaxed.
You know what I noticed withgolf?
I was playing with someone thatreally irritated me and every
time he made a comment I just Ihit the hit the ball so hard.
I've never hit it so well andit just went above the water and
it went to the greens.
I was like you know what?
You should irritate me moreoften.
So I noticed that was like oneof my motivations.

(01:07:12):
So if that works for you, bringsomeone that annoys you to the
golf club and they will put youlike in your best game.
So yeah, and tennis, tennis isreally good for anger issues.
Just imagine people you don'tlike on these balls and you'll
do fine.

Speaker 1 (01:07:28):
Sports and exercise can certainly be healthy, for
sure, so healthy.
We've been having some greatweather, at least out here on
the West Coast.
I'm sure on the East Coast youhave too right.

Speaker 2 (01:07:41):
Yes, and then the Belmont Country Club has, let me
see, trying to see what they,let me get the address, like we
said, for them specifically.

Speaker 1 (01:07:52):
I'd also like for you to send me all those links too,
so I can put them at the bottom.
So, if you're listening to this, scroll down to the show notes
or the description, and all thelinks that we mentioned here
will be available down there atthe bottom so you can click on
them and follow support, even onsocial media, or even join the
gala or the golf tournamentthat's going on um there in the

(01:08:15):
dc area as well it's going to beso fun.

Speaker 2 (01:08:18):
And then the address for the belmont is 19661 belmont
, manor Lane, ashburn, virginia.
It is so beautiful.
That's why the foursomes arelike a thousand bucks, because
it's so gorgeous.
It's like a lot of water, angrygeese, like you know.
Just gorgeous, just gorgeousview.
You're going to have tons offun.

(01:08:39):
We're going to have food, we'regoing to enjoy ourselves, so
it's going to be a fun time itsounds like it's a great time to
get out with your friends andmeet new people as well so one
of the biggest challenges, orsome of the biggest challenges
that we face, running thisnon-profit is, um, like there's

(01:09:00):
a lot of gatekeeping andcompetition and and like people
feeling threatened that you'regoing to go in their territories
.
And my answer to that is youknow, let's make this a
collaborative event, you know,because what's mine will always
be mine and what yours, what isyours, will always be yours, and
no one could take that from theother person.
There's plenty of opportunity.

(01:09:20):
So let's just like, as womenlike, put each other's crown.
You know we're gonna be fine.
You know the mission should bethe survivors, not our own
self-interest and egos.
And it's like, you know beinglike being an immigrant, being a
black woman now that I wear thehijab, it's like it's, it's a
lot of, you know, barriers oflike what are you doing in this

(01:09:43):
area, like in this section?
And I don't mind it, I don'tmind that underestimation, I
don't like, I don't mind thecriticism, because it's just
kind of like I can because Iwant to.
You know, I do it because Iwant to, because I can, and that
way these challenges are reallyimportant because once we get
to where we need to be, then ifthere's anybody behind me who

(01:10:05):
wants to do the same thing.
There will be no gatekeepinghere.
We'll open the door for you,we'll give you the roadmap
because, like I said, whateveris meant for me, you can't take
it vice versa.
And our goal is to make thingseasier for people, not make it
harder to fight for them to getinto spaces.
So our goal is like we'regetting into these spaces, we're
working hard so viewers can belike an easy pathway.

(01:10:29):
You know challenges are goodfor us because we can handle
them, but I don't think peopleshould have to fight and be
scrappy, you know, to thisdegree to help people.
So we want to make thingseasier for people, you know, to
help other people and it shouldnot be a competition, especially
in this nonprofit sector.

Speaker 1 (01:10:47):
Right, yeah, a lot of , a lot of obstacles that are,
that are in the way, a lot of umovercoming those obstacles.
A lot of people, a lot ofpeople saying no, um, a lot of
times people don't realize that.
How many no's you get beforeyou get a yes?

Speaker 2 (01:11:08):
And you have to stay in, stay in the pocket, the
pocket right.
The rejection the amount ofrejection I get, they don't see
that, it's not seen.
That's a lot of rejection, it'sa lot of no's.
But you know what this taughtme?
Before I used to be like scaredof asking for money or like
being weird or like framingthings.
Now I'm like not, it's easy.
Now I'm okay.
Hi, I know you pledged to dosponsorships for us.
Can you do it by this date anddate this date?

(01:11:29):
If it doesn't work, can yougive me alternatives, you know?
And then it's just kind of likethey pledge something.
You tell them like hey, can Iget this date or this date?
Like which one does it work for?
It's just kind of like at firstit's scary but now it's just
kind of like it's okay to askand if they say no, then you
move on to the next person.
It's going to be fine.
But it's like it's helping meget out of my shell more and not

(01:11:51):
be weird of asking forsponsorships or money, because
I'm doing this it's not for me,it's for people.
So like I think there'ssomething about doing something
for people that gives you a lotmore confidence.
You're like.
That's not for me.
The money is to help yourcommunity.
Please provide it.
So it's kind of like you getout of your shell, you become
more confident, so it's prettynice.

Speaker 1 (01:12:13):
Yeah, that's really, really important for all of our
listeners out there.
If you're looking to support acause that's real, raw and
relentless, focused on healingand empowerment, make sure you
attend the gala on the 20th ofAugust at the tower club and
then in September 29th rightMonday, september 29th join the

(01:12:34):
golf tournament that's going tobe helping be rise above, be
relentless.
You can also learn more at riseabove, be relentless.
Dot better world Dot org aswell.
Make sure you follow Samaya onall her social media accounts as
well.
Samaya, I really appreciate youjoining us for your powerful
voice in this space.
I'd like to say that I hope tocontinue to see you to keep

(01:12:57):
rising, keep fighting and keepbeing relentless as well.
Just thank you for all theinformation and not only that,
but sharing a piece of you.
You know and what you're about,where you come from and who you
are on the podcast today.
You know just your time and allthe technical difficulties that
we dealt with today.
I really appreciate you beingflexible and giving me this

(01:13:20):
opportunity.
It's been a true honor.

Speaker 2 (01:13:23):
Thank you so much.
Thank you so much for sharingyour story and giving me this
opportunity.
It's been a true honor.
Thank you so much.
Thank you so much for sharingyour story and having me on
again for the third time and Iknow this won't be the last time
, so I do appreciate it.
Thank you so much, kp.
You do a lot good for thecommunity and for the Formation
Nation, so you're pretty awesome.

Speaker 1 (01:13:37):
You just helped me come up with a new tagline today
, so I'm doing like those adplacements Form tagline today.

Speaker 2 (01:13:44):
I'm doing those ad placements.

Speaker 1 (01:13:45):
Formation Nation.
Formation Nation, I'm going togive you a chance to enjoy that
beautiful East Coast weathertoday.
It's getting afternoon time foryou out there, for everyone
else out there, make sure youtune in, to Rise Above and Be
Relentless.
Like I said, follow them onsocial media, check out their
website as well.
As always, I want you to staytuned, stay focused and stay

(01:14:07):
motivated.
Fall out.