April 3, 2025 • 20 mins
In this episode, I open up about my own spiritual journey, especially in the wake of my divorce, and how it led to the most transformative awakening I’ve ever experienced. From confronting the ego to finding peace through service, I walk you through the stages of spiritual growth that have shaped the woman I am today.
The “seven levels of spirituality,” the idea of ego death, and how leaning into meditation, self-reflection, and service brought me to a place of unity consciousness. If you've ever wondered how to tell the difference between your ego and your higher self—or if you're just starting to explore your own spiritual path— I hope this episode inspires you to look within, trust the journey, and maybe even start your own awakening.
Episode Highlights:
[0:02] - Kicking off the episode with a reflection on spirituality vs. religion.
[1:25] - Sharing my first spiritual awakening at age 19 and how it's evolved since.
[2:55] - Breaking down the seven levels of spirituality.
[6:03] - Exploring the 12 spiritual principles that define a spiritual life.
[7:25] - What it means to listen to your higher self.
[9:00] - The contrast between ego and higher self—understanding “ego death”.
[11:15] - Mindfulness, meditation, and humility as tools for spiritual growth.
[14:08] - How trusted feedback (from friends and the Divine) helped shape my awakening.
[16:02] - The role of service and helping others during my darkest days.
[17:45] - What happens after an ego death and how we rebuild.
[19:18] - A heartfelt message I wrote about my journey through pain to power.
[20:15] - Final thoughts and an invitation to reach out and connect.
Links & Resources:
Be sure to follow, share, and leave a comment if this show resonates with you! Send me a message at podpage.com/themusicoflife to share your experiences, or to leave a comment. I'd love to feature it in a future episode.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Caryn Portnoy (00:02):
Hi everyone, and welcome to the music of Life.
I'm your host. Karen Portnoy,before I get into this episode,
please comment, ask questions,share some of your experiences,
and don't forget to subscribe.
YouI wanted to start this episode
(00:30):
by talking about the fact thatpeople have asked me, What does
it look like to heal, and how doyou heal? How do you start to
heal? What do you do? And I'monly going to talk about
spirituality in this episode.
I'm not going to approachreligion or anything like that.
There are different philosophieswith different religions, and I
(00:53):
don't want to get into that. Somy experience has been with
spirituality. So that's whereI'm going to speak from. I know
I mentioned in an earlierepisode that my first spiritual
awakening happened when I was 19years old. I'm now 56 as my
birthday was yesterday, and Ibelieve that while there are
(01:13):
typically, you know, like, I'mgonna say informally, there are
seven levels of spirituality.
I'm going to just read whatGoogle has to say about it, but
I My experience has been thatover the years, I've had several
different levels of spiritualawakenings, and some of them
were hitting some parts of theseven levels that I'm going to
(01:36):
say in a minute. But you know,other times it was just varying
degrees of intensity for certainlevels. So, you know, while I
was dabbling over the years andkind of waking up and
understanding certain conceptsor whatever, I believe that this
last Spiritual Awakening was themother load for me. So my
(01:59):
divorce is what inspired it, andI'll talk more about that as
this episode goes on. So I justwant to say what the seven
levels of spirituality areinformally. So take it with a
grain of salt. To Google issaying that while this, the
concept of seven levels ofspirituality can vary depending
on the context, a commonframework often associated with
(02:22):
spiritual awakening includesstages like waking
consciousness, feedback loop,sleep level, soul consciousness,
cosmic consciousness, divineconsciousness and unity
consciousness. So here's a moredetailed breakdown of these
levels, along with somealternative perspectives. So
(02:45):
with waking consciousness, thisis the initial stage where
you're you're aware of yourphysical reality and the world
around you. Kind of basic thefeedback loop is you start to
notice patterns and reactions inyour life, and you begin to
understand how your actions haveconsequences. The Sleep level
this stage is characterized by asense of being stuck in a cycle
(03:10):
of negativity and self sabotage.
I think we can all relate tothat, and sleep level doesn't
refer to actually sleeping likeat night. It's more about not
being aware and like you'reasleep, hence the term spiritual
awakening. So this is theopposite where you're asleep
(03:30):
soul consciousness. You begin toconnect with your inner self and
your purpose, and you start toexperience a deeper sense of
meaning in life. That's when itstarts to get interesting. The
cosmic consciousness. You startto understand your place in the
universe and your connection toall things, which is really
(03:52):
cool. Divine Consciousness iswhen you experience a sense of
oneness with the Divine and adeeper understanding of the
universe. Unity Consciousness iswhen you're fully aware of your
interconnectedness with allbeings and the universe, and you
experience a state of pure loveand compassion, which is where I
(04:13):
am now. But you know, I it tooktime. It took a long time for me
to get through all these sevenlevels. There's also, you know,
informally, these 12 rules ofspirituality. So these
principles of recovery are asfollows, acceptance, hope,
(04:34):
faith, courage, honesty,patience, humility, willingness,
brotherly love, integrity, selfdiscipline and service. And if
you really group all theseprinciples together, you know
you're living a very spirituallife, and it's pretty apparent.
(04:57):
So.
So how do you know when yourhigher self is talking to you?
So your higher self is I don'treally know if I can explain
this well enough, but it's yourbest self. It's your most
elevated self. It's your mostconnected self to the universe
(05:21):
or God or source, or however youdefine that, that power bigger
than you, and it's usually aspace of of like pure love and
just a sense of goodness as a asa human being. So how do you
know when that higher self istalking to you? You're trusting
your intuition, getting in touchwith your emotions, living a
(05:44):
life of gratitude, and becomingmore involved in your world for
the greater good. Those are allways that your higher self is
talking to you. So if you sitand think about that for a
minute, you know, do you everhave times when you sense that,
when you feel that, if not, youknow, and I'm not saying this in
(06:04):
a judgmental way at all, but youknow, everyone knows that
everyone has an ego, and ego is,you know, basically designed to
help protect us, but it keeps usvery separate, very Closed, very
prideful, kind of the oppositeof all of these things with your
higher self. So your ego is kindof like the opposite of your
(06:28):
higher self. So in spirituality,you know, there for anyone who's
spiritual out there, you knowwhat I mean when I call it the
dark night of the soul or theego death. For those of you who
are not so spiritual, I inviteyou to look it up and read up on
it, because it'll be very eyeopening in terms of how it
(06:48):
affects and impacts your life.
So you know the concept ofhaving an ego death. What that
means it's to cultivatemindfulness, practice humility
and engage in self reflection,to identify and detach from
limiting beliefs andattachments, ultimately
fostering a sense ofinterconnectedness and
(07:09):
equanimity. So here's a moredetailed breakdown of how to
approach this mindfulness andmeditation. So regular
meditation and mindfulnesspractices can help you become
more aware of your thoughts andemotions, allowing you to
observe your egos reactionswithout getting carried away by
(07:30):
them. And I'm very clear, it'seasy to say all this stuff, it's
another thing to actuallyimplement them and and carry
them out in your life. And I'maware of that, and I've been
through that, so just giveyourself time, patience and
Grace if you're gonna, you know,embark on any of these things.
The next thing is to practicehumility. Humility involves
(07:51):
acknowledging your limitationsand recognizing that you don't
have all the answers. Bypracticing humility, you can
reduce your sense of superiorityand detachment from others self
reflection, regularly examineyour thoughts, feelings and
behaviors to identify patternsof ego driven thinking and
(08:13):
actions. This self awareness canhelp you recognize when your ego
is taking over, and makeconscious choices to respond
differently. Embraceimpermanence, understand that
everything is constantlychanging and nothing is
permanent, including your senseof self. This perspective can
help you detach from attachmentsand embrace the flow of life.
(08:36):
Practicing empathy andcompassion. Cultivate empathy
and compassion for yourself andothers, recognizing that
everyone is on their ownjourney, this can help you move
beyond self centeredness andfoster a sense of
interconnectedness, detachingfrom external validation.
Recognize that your worth is notdependent on external
(09:00):
achievements or opinions.
Instead, focus on your innergrowth and spiritual
development. Seeking honestfeedback. Actively solicit
feedback from trusted sourcesand be open to constructive
criticism. This can help youidentify blind spots and areas
where your ego might be gettingin the way. This was an this was
(09:23):
a really interesting one for me,because while I was going
through my divorce and the mostpainful parts of it, of course,
I had a very, very close circleof trusted friends that were
always there for me, and somewere, you know, holding the
mirror up to me and showing mewhere my blind spots were, and I
(09:46):
got the constructive criticism Ineeded almost on a daily basis.
So I got that feedback fromfriends and close allies, but at
the same time, and ultimately,once, the spiritual awakening.
Was developing for me, I trustedGod over everything to give me
(10:06):
the feedback that I needed,because I was seeking a higher
level of understanding of whatthis spiritual awakening was
providing me with. So while Icould speak to my friends on a
day to day 3d in reality, kindof experience, it was really
important to me, when I wasconnecting to God, to get that
(10:29):
higher perspective. And thattook a lot of prayer and a lot
of meditation to get there, andit took several months, as I've
mentioned before. So, you know,this wasn't an overnight thing
at all, but it was what I wasseeking. It was what I was
craving. I was really very laserfocused on elevating and growing
(10:53):
and evolving. So, you know, it'sinteresting to just say that,
you know, seeking honestfeedback. I got it from my
reality, and I also got it fromthe Divine. So it was two
different perspectives thatreally helped propel me forward.
And then the last one is focuson service and contribution.
Engage in activities thatbenefit others and contribute to
(11:17):
something larger than yourself.
This can help you shift yourfocus from your own needs and
desires to serving others. Andthis was a huge thing for me,
because while I was goingthrough the worst of the worst
of my divorce, and I was gainingexperience and gaining wisdom
from everything that I wasdealing with in connection with
God and the universe, I was veryopen and expressive on social
(11:42):
media, in many divorce groupswhere I was reading and hearing
about other people's stories andwhat they were going through and
and the pain that we all feltwas universal. There were a lot
of common themes among people'sstories, and the wisdom that I
was able to provide was verywell received and accepted and
(12:06):
appreciated, and I got somegreat feedback from people, and
that was my way of servingothers, was being able to help
and inspire people and give thempositivity. And some, you know,
something to look forward to,instead of dwelling so much on
the past. And I find I alwaysbelieved, and I would say, you
(12:28):
know, at least for the last 15years or so, I always believe
that the best way to escape yourown pain and your own trauma is
to put it on something else orsomeone else. And you know,
whether it's starting anorganization where you're
collecting donations forsomething, a cause or a person
(12:50):
or whoever, or helping somebodyin need with their own things
that they are struggling with,or, you know, whatever, just
getting out of yourself and onto other people is so healing
and so helpful, and it makes youfeel so good, and enough of us
don't do it, so it's somethingto think about.
(13:17):
So what happens after an egodeath? Individuals may
experience a profound shift intheir sense of self and reality,
potentially leading to a senseof unity or oneness, spiritual
awakening and a re evaluation oftheir world view and personal
identity. And here's a moredetailed explanation of that ego
(13:39):
death, in its most literalsense, is a complete loss of the
ordinary subjective sense ofself, including the feeling of
being separate from others andthe world. So you could have a
spiritual awakening, someindividuals report experiencing
a profound sense of connectionto something larger than
(14:00):
themselves, leading to spiritualor existential insights. You
could experience personalgrowth. The experience can be a
catalyst for personaltransformation as individuals
confront and transcend theirusual ego driven perspectives
and attachments. Or you can havea re evaluation of reality, the
(14:22):
experience can lead to a reevaluation of one's world view
and the nature of reality,potentially leading to a sense
of detachment from the ordinary.
After the experience,individuals return to their
daily lives, but they mayapproach them with a new
perspective and a sense ofexpanded awareness, integration
and rebuilding. It's importantto note that the ego as a
(14:45):
construct often returns after anego death experience, rebuilding
a sense of self whileincorporating the insights
gained can be a process ofintegration and self discovery
in. And the potential challengesare, the experience can be very
challenging and even frighteningfor some, and it's important to
(15:05):
seek support and guidance ifneeded. So that could be in the
form of a therapist. It could bea spiritual mentor or teacher,
and I would just say in allthree of those examples, to be
very careful that you don't justfind somebody and just accept
everything that they say. Imean, you know, you have to kind
(15:26):
of seek your inner guidance andintuition and see whether
somebody is the right fit foryou. Somebody may have different
feelings or thoughts orinterpretations or opinions
about things that don't resonatewith you, in which case I would
say, go find somebody else. Youmay have to kiss a few frogs
before you find the right fitfor yourself. And the same with
(15:48):
a spiritual mentor or teacher.
You know you want to look atsomebody and hear what they have
to say and see how much thatfits with how you feel, even if
you don't know anything aboutit, but if they're saying
something that that sounds rightfor you, it sounds good to you.
It sounds like yeah, I mightfeel that way too. That's a good
(16:11):
sign.
So the whole reason why I evenwanted to talk about this today
was because I had some recentunderstandings about myself and
my own healing and my ownspiritual awakening and ego
death and all of that. And Ijust I wrote it down because I
(16:35):
didn't want to forget it. Iwanted to make sure I said it
the right way. But it was, itwas more about my experience and
how I went from the depths ofhell to where I am right now. So
I just wanted to read what Iwrote and and maybe that can
enlighten some, some peoplehere, I accept that I'm cut from
(16:56):
a different cloth. No oneunderstands why, except me and
God, it was the darkness that Ihad to fight through while no
one was watching, the ego deaththat I had to go through. It was
standing alone when no one elsewould stand with me, the shift I
made, the focus I had, what Iplaced in my heart, what I've
(17:19):
come to understand is how I makepeople feel about themselves.
I've seen how I can put a smileon someone's face who is
otherwise sad. I'm not held upby any particular achievement.
It's that my desire to be a goodperson is what makes me one. I
show up in each moment with myhighest intentions in mind. It's
(17:40):
been my willingness toconstantly release my attach.
It's been my willingness toconstantly release my
attachments to outcomes. I'mwilling to go through great pain
in order to turn it into power,a little bit of hurt, to be a
lot more free. I understand thepower of transmutation. I've
become an alchemist. To methat's way more important than
(18:05):
anything else I can achieve. SoI'm really proud of all of the
work that I've done, all of thehealing that I've done. And, you
know, look, I'm at the point nowwhere I can be grateful for all
of the pain and suffering that Iwent through to get to this
place and to get to this point,and I feel like I'm in a much
(18:25):
better position to be able tohelp and inspire other people
going through something similar,whether it's through a spiritual
journey and awakening, orwhether it's through means of
psychology or religion orwhatever path anyone chooses to
take. I'm so aware and veryconnected to the pain that other
(18:46):
people are suffering through, Iwant very badly to be that life
raft that I never had for peoplewho need help getting out of
their struggle. And I inviteanybody who is interested in
taking a spiritual path, toreach out to me, Do your own
research, if you're so inclined,or seek out, you know, teachers
(19:09):
or people who can mentor you andhelp you and and, you know,
look, anybody that wants toevolve and grow, I applaud. I
think that it's so great. Andand this world needs people,
more people like this now morethan ever. So I'm here to do my
part and, and I just wanteveryone out there to know that
(19:30):
you're not alone. So on thatnote, if anyone has any
questions or wants to share anyof your own stories or
experiences, I invite you toreach me at my website, which is
pod page.com/the, music of life.
You can leave your email, youcan leave me a voicemail. You
can send me any kind ofmessages. I promise to keep you
(19:52):
anonymous if I if I wind upusing your stories or
experiences on future episodes.
Codes, but it's it's a great wayto give back to everyone else,
so I appreciate your listening,and I'll catch you in the next
episode.
(20:15):
Please join me every Thursdayfor our new episode if you'd
like to reach out to me and askquestions or share stories of
your own, your own experiencesthrough any of these things I
would love to hear from you.
Please also subscribe. You.
Hi everyone, and welcome to the music of Life.
I'm your host. Karen Portnoy,before I get into this episode,
please comment, ask questions,share some of your experiences,
and don't forget to subscribe.
YouI wanted to start this episode
(00:30):
by talking about the fact thatpeople have asked me, What does
it look like to heal, and how doyou heal? How do you start to
heal? What do you do? And I'monly going to talk about
spirituality in this episode.
I'm not going to approachreligion or anything like that.
There are different philosophieswith different religions, and I
(00:53):
don't want to get into that. Somy experience has been with
spirituality. So that's whereI'm going to speak from. I know
I mentioned in an earlierepisode that my first spiritual
awakening happened when I was 19years old. I'm now 56 as my
birthday was yesterday, and Ibelieve that while there are
(01:13):
typically, you know, like, I'mgonna say informally, there are
seven levels of spirituality.
I'm going to just read whatGoogle has to say about it, but
I My experience has been thatover the years, I've had several
different levels of spiritualawakenings, and some of them
were hitting some parts of theseven levels that I'm going to
(01:36):
say in a minute. But you know,other times it was just varying
degrees of intensity for certainlevels. So, you know, while I
was dabbling over the years andkind of waking up and
understanding certain conceptsor whatever, I believe that this
last Spiritual Awakening was themother load for me. So my
(01:59):
divorce is what inspired it, andI'll talk more about that as
this episode goes on. So I justwant to say what the seven
levels of spirituality areinformally. So take it with a
grain of salt. To Google issaying that while this, the
concept of seven levels ofspirituality can vary depending
on the context, a commonframework often associated with
(02:22):
spiritual awakening includesstages like waking
consciousness, feedback loop,sleep level, soul consciousness,
cosmic consciousness, divineconsciousness and unity
consciousness. So here's a moredetailed breakdown of these
levels, along with somealternative perspectives. So
(02:45):
with waking consciousness, thisis the initial stage where
you're you're aware of yourphysical reality and the world
around you. Kind of basic thefeedback loop is you start to
notice patterns and reactions inyour life, and you begin to
understand how your actions haveconsequences. The Sleep level
this stage is characterized by asense of being stuck in a cycle
(03:10):
of negativity and self sabotage.
I think we can all relate tothat, and sleep level doesn't
refer to actually sleeping likeat night. It's more about not
being aware and like you'reasleep, hence the term spiritual
awakening. So this is theopposite where you're asleep
(03:30):
soul consciousness. You begin toconnect with your inner self and
your purpose, and you start toexperience a deeper sense of
meaning in life. That's when itstarts to get interesting. The
cosmic consciousness. You startto understand your place in the
universe and your connection toall things, which is really
(03:52):
cool. Divine Consciousness iswhen you experience a sense of
oneness with the Divine and adeeper understanding of the
universe. Unity Consciousness iswhen you're fully aware of your
interconnectedness with allbeings and the universe, and you
experience a state of pure loveand compassion, which is where I
(04:13):
am now. But you know, I it tooktime. It took a long time for me
to get through all these sevenlevels. There's also, you know,
informally, these 12 rules ofspirituality. So these
principles of recovery are asfollows, acceptance, hope,
(04:34):
faith, courage, honesty,patience, humility, willingness,
brotherly love, integrity, selfdiscipline and service. And if
you really group all theseprinciples together, you know
you're living a very spirituallife, and it's pretty apparent.
(04:57):
So.
So how do you know when yourhigher self is talking to you?
So your higher self is I don'treally know if I can explain
this well enough, but it's yourbest self. It's your most
elevated self. It's your mostconnected self to the universe
(05:21):
or God or source, or however youdefine that, that power bigger
than you, and it's usually aspace of of like pure love and
just a sense of goodness as a asa human being. So how do you
know when that higher self istalking to you? You're trusting
your intuition, getting in touchwith your emotions, living a
(05:44):
life of gratitude, and becomingmore involved in your world for
the greater good. Those are allways that your higher self is
talking to you. So if you sitand think about that for a
minute, you know, do you everhave times when you sense that,
when you feel that, if not, youknow, and I'm not saying this in
(06:04):
a judgmental way at all, but youknow, everyone knows that
everyone has an ego, and ego is,you know, basically designed to
help protect us, but it keeps usvery separate, very Closed, very
prideful, kind of the oppositeof all of these things with your
higher self. So your ego is kindof like the opposite of your
(06:28):
higher self. So in spirituality,you know, there for anyone who's
spiritual out there, you knowwhat I mean when I call it the
dark night of the soul or theego death. For those of you who
are not so spiritual, I inviteyou to look it up and read up on
it, because it'll be very eyeopening in terms of how it
(06:48):
affects and impacts your life.
So you know the concept ofhaving an ego death. What that
means it's to cultivatemindfulness, practice humility
and engage in self reflection,to identify and detach from
limiting beliefs andattachments, ultimately
fostering a sense ofinterconnectedness and
(07:09):
equanimity. So here's a moredetailed breakdown of how to
approach this mindfulness andmeditation. So regular
meditation and mindfulnesspractices can help you become
more aware of your thoughts andemotions, allowing you to
observe your egos reactionswithout getting carried away by
(07:30):
them. And I'm very clear, it'seasy to say all this stuff, it's
another thing to actuallyimplement them and and carry
them out in your life. And I'maware of that, and I've been
through that, so just giveyourself time, patience and
Grace if you're gonna, you know,embark on any of these things.
The next thing is to practicehumility. Humility involves
(07:51):
acknowledging your limitationsand recognizing that you don't
have all the answers. Bypracticing humility, you can
reduce your sense of superiorityand detachment from others self
reflection, regularly examineyour thoughts, feelings and
behaviors to identify patternsof ego driven thinking and
(08:13):
actions. This self awareness canhelp you recognize when your ego
is taking over, and makeconscious choices to respond
differently. Embraceimpermanence, understand that
everything is constantlychanging and nothing is
permanent, including your senseof self. This perspective can
help you detach from attachmentsand embrace the flow of life.
(08:36):
Practicing empathy andcompassion. Cultivate empathy
and compassion for yourself andothers, recognizing that
everyone is on their ownjourney, this can help you move
beyond self centeredness andfoster a sense of
interconnectedness, detachingfrom external validation.
Recognize that your worth is notdependent on external
(09:00):
achievements or opinions.
Instead, focus on your innergrowth and spiritual
development. Seeking honestfeedback. Actively solicit
feedback from trusted sourcesand be open to constructive
criticism. This can help youidentify blind spots and areas
where your ego might be gettingin the way. This was an this was
(09:23):
a really interesting one for me,because while I was going
through my divorce and the mostpainful parts of it, of course,
I had a very, very close circleof trusted friends that were
always there for me, and somewere, you know, holding the
mirror up to me and showing mewhere my blind spots were, and I
(09:46):
got the constructive criticism Ineeded almost on a daily basis.
So I got that feedback fromfriends and close allies, but at
the same time, and ultimately,once, the spiritual awakening.
Was developing for me, I trustedGod over everything to give me
(10:06):
the feedback that I needed,because I was seeking a higher
level of understanding of whatthis spiritual awakening was
providing me with. So while Icould speak to my friends on a
day to day 3d in reality, kindof experience, it was really
important to me, when I wasconnecting to God, to get that
(10:29):
higher perspective. And thattook a lot of prayer and a lot
of meditation to get there, andit took several months, as I've
mentioned before. So, you know,this wasn't an overnight thing
at all, but it was what I wasseeking. It was what I was
craving. I was really very laserfocused on elevating and growing
(10:53):
and evolving. So, you know, it'sinteresting to just say that,
you know, seeking honestfeedback. I got it from my
reality, and I also got it fromthe Divine. So it was two
different perspectives thatreally helped propel me forward.
And then the last one is focuson service and contribution.
Engage in activities thatbenefit others and contribute to
(11:17):
something larger than yourself.
This can help you shift yourfocus from your own needs and
desires to serving others. Andthis was a huge thing for me,
because while I was goingthrough the worst of the worst
of my divorce, and I was gainingexperience and gaining wisdom
from everything that I wasdealing with in connection with
God and the universe, I was veryopen and expressive on social
(11:42):
media, in many divorce groupswhere I was reading and hearing
about other people's stories andwhat they were going through and
and the pain that we all feltwas universal. There were a lot
of common themes among people'sstories, and the wisdom that I
was able to provide was verywell received and accepted and
(12:06):
appreciated, and I got somegreat feedback from people, and
that was my way of servingothers, was being able to help
and inspire people and give thempositivity. And some, you know,
something to look forward to,instead of dwelling so much on
the past. And I find I alwaysbelieved, and I would say, you
(12:28):
know, at least for the last 15years or so, I always believe
that the best way to escape yourown pain and your own trauma is
to put it on something else orsomeone else. And you know,
whether it's starting anorganization where you're
collecting donations forsomething, a cause or a person
(12:50):
or whoever, or helping somebodyin need with their own things
that they are struggling with,or, you know, whatever, just
getting out of yourself and onto other people is so healing
and so helpful, and it makes youfeel so good, and enough of us
don't do it, so it's somethingto think about.
(13:17):
So what happens after an egodeath? Individuals may
experience a profound shift intheir sense of self and reality,
potentially leading to a senseof unity or oneness, spiritual
awakening and a re evaluation oftheir world view and personal
identity. And here's a moredetailed explanation of that ego
(13:39):
death, in its most literalsense, is a complete loss of the
ordinary subjective sense ofself, including the feeling of
being separate from others andthe world. So you could have a
spiritual awakening, someindividuals report experiencing
a profound sense of connectionto something larger than
(14:00):
themselves, leading to spiritualor existential insights. You
could experience personalgrowth. The experience can be a
catalyst for personaltransformation as individuals
confront and transcend theirusual ego driven perspectives
and attachments. Or you can havea re evaluation of reality, the
(14:22):
experience can lead to a reevaluation of one's world view
and the nature of reality,potentially leading to a sense
of detachment from the ordinary.
After the experience,individuals return to their
daily lives, but they mayapproach them with a new
perspective and a sense ofexpanded awareness, integration
and rebuilding. It's importantto note that the ego as a
(14:45):
construct often returns after anego death experience, rebuilding
a sense of self whileincorporating the insights
gained can be a process ofintegration and self discovery
in. And the potential challengesare, the experience can be very
challenging and even frighteningfor some, and it's important to
(15:05):
seek support and guidance ifneeded. So that could be in the
form of a therapist. It could bea spiritual mentor or teacher,
and I would just say in allthree of those examples, to be
very careful that you don't justfind somebody and just accept
everything that they say. Imean, you know, you have to kind
(15:26):
of seek your inner guidance andintuition and see whether
somebody is the right fit foryou. Somebody may have different
feelings or thoughts orinterpretations or opinions
about things that don't resonatewith you, in which case I would
say, go find somebody else. Youmay have to kiss a few frogs
before you find the right fitfor yourself. And the same with
(15:48):
a spiritual mentor or teacher.
You know you want to look atsomebody and hear what they have
to say and see how much thatfits with how you feel, even if
you don't know anything aboutit, but if they're saying
something that that sounds rightfor you, it sounds good to you.
It sounds like yeah, I mightfeel that way too. That's a good
(16:11):
sign.
So the whole reason why I evenwanted to talk about this today
was because I had some recentunderstandings about myself and
my own healing and my ownspiritual awakening and ego
death and all of that. And Ijust I wrote it down because I
(16:35):
didn't want to forget it. Iwanted to make sure I said it
the right way. But it was, itwas more about my experience and
how I went from the depths ofhell to where I am right now. So
I just wanted to read what Iwrote and and maybe that can
enlighten some, some peoplehere, I accept that I'm cut from
(16:56):
a different cloth. No oneunderstands why, except me and
God, it was the darkness that Ihad to fight through while no
one was watching, the ego deaththat I had to go through. It was
standing alone when no one elsewould stand with me, the shift I
made, the focus I had, what Iplaced in my heart, what I've
(17:19):
come to understand is how I makepeople feel about themselves.
I've seen how I can put a smileon someone's face who is
otherwise sad. I'm not held upby any particular achievement.
It's that my desire to be a goodperson is what makes me one. I
show up in each moment with myhighest intentions in mind. It's
(17:40):
been my willingness toconstantly release my attach.
It's been my willingness toconstantly release my
attachments to outcomes. I'mwilling to go through great pain
in order to turn it into power,a little bit of hurt, to be a
lot more free. I understand thepower of transmutation. I've
become an alchemist. To methat's way more important than
(18:05):
anything else I can achieve. SoI'm really proud of all of the
work that I've done, all of thehealing that I've done. And, you
know, look, I'm at the point nowwhere I can be grateful for all
of the pain and suffering that Iwent through to get to this
place and to get to this point,and I feel like I'm in a much
(18:25):
better position to be able tohelp and inspire other people
going through something similar,whether it's through a spiritual
journey and awakening, orwhether it's through means of
psychology or religion orwhatever path anyone chooses to
take. I'm so aware and veryconnected to the pain that other
(18:46):
people are suffering through, Iwant very badly to be that life
raft that I never had for peoplewho need help getting out of
their struggle. And I inviteanybody who is interested in
taking a spiritual path, toreach out to me, Do your own
research, if you're so inclined,or seek out, you know, teachers
(19:09):
or people who can mentor you andhelp you and and, you know,
look, anybody that wants toevolve and grow, I applaud. I
think that it's so great. Andand this world needs people,
more people like this now morethan ever. So I'm here to do my
part and, and I just wanteveryone out there to know that
(19:30):
you're not alone. So on thatnote, if anyone has any
questions or wants to share anyof your own stories or
experiences, I invite you toreach me at my website, which is
pod page.com/the, music of life.
You can leave your email, youcan leave me a voicemail. You
can send me any kind ofmessages. I promise to keep you
(19:52):
anonymous if I if I wind upusing your stories or
experiences on future episodes.
Codes, but it's it's a great wayto give back to everyone else,
so I appreciate your listening,and I'll catch you in the next
episode.
(20:15):
Please join me every Thursdayfor our new episode if you'd
like to reach out to me and askquestions or share stories of
your own, your own experiencesthrough any of these things I
would love to hear from you.
Please also subscribe. You.
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