52. Feeling Overwhelmed? Ask Yourself This Powerful Question

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This week on The Nurses' Breakroom, Jenny Lytle, RN, shares a deceptively simple question that helps overwhelmed and overworked nurses pause, refocus, and reclaim clarity in the middle of chaos: What do I need most right now?

Whether you're juggling shift changes, life transitions, or just a mountain of mental to-dos, this episode teaches a grounding technique that brings you back to center—fast. Jenny walks through her own real-life moment of overwhelm and how this single question, paired with a calming breathing practice, helped her shift into focus and peace in under five minutes.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• Why “What do I need most right now?” is a powerful self-coaching question
• How to quiet mental noise when your brain won’t stop spinning
• The Quick Coherence Technique: a science-backed way to regulate your nervous system
• The body-mind connection that helps you break through emotional overwhelm
• How to prepare for a demanding week without burning out

This episode is your reminder: self-care isn’t selfish—it’s essential.

If you're feeling overwhelmed, burned out, or like there’s never enough time, I’ve got something just for you! Head to https://selfcareisntselfish.com to grab your FREE copy of my book, Self-Care Isn’t Selfish: The Compassionate Nurse’s Step-by-Step Guide to Personalized Stress Relief. It’s packed with simple, effective strategies to help you prioritize your needs—without guilt—so you can feel energized, focused, and ready to take on the day. Go to https://selfcareisntselfish.com 

Looking for connection with people who get the stress and self-care struggles of nurses and caregivers? Check out https://thenursesbreakroom.com

Connect on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jennylytlern/

More ways to connect here: https://linktr.ee/jennylytle

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello and welcome back to another episode of the
Nurses Break Room with JennyLytle RN.
This week we are going to getdown to the nitty gritty and
really focus on the big question, and that's what do I need most
right now.
Last week we talked about beingstuck and what that can feel

(00:21):
like and ways to get unstuck,and so if you haven't checked
that out, be sure to tune in.
But sometimes, when we'refeeling stuck or when we're
feeling overwhelmed, thesimplest, quickest, easiest
thing that we can do is to justpause and ask ourselves one

(00:45):
question what do I need mostright now?
And this is a question that Iuse myself and that I use with
my clients, and it's so powerful.
But it can seem deceptivelysimple and just prior to this

(01:06):
recording, I thought you knowwhat?
I'm going to try this because Iwas feeling a bit overwhelmed.
I've got a lot of things goingright now and I'm wanting to go
to the lake for a little bit andjust be able to cool off and
relax.
It's Sunday right now andtomorrow I start orientation for

(01:27):
a new position, or actually arepeated position, and so I know
that my week is going to lookvery different than it normally
looks, so I really want thistime to just be able to relax
and focus on nothing butrelaxation.

(01:48):
But, like you probably do, Ihave a lot of other things that
I could be doing instead, andI've spent a lot of time this
morning and this weekend doingsome relaxing but also getting
through some of those things sothat I would be prepared to have
some time to enjoy the lake.
But when I was like, okay, youknow what, I still feel like

(02:11):
I've got all these things to doin preparation for my week and I
don't want that to be allstressed out, and so I thought
I'm going to try this withmyself again, even though I know
it works because I use itpretty frequently.
Okay, but I just I stopped.
I sat down, closed my eyes andthought what do I need most
right now?
And, to be quite transparent, Iasked myself that about 10

(02:39):
times in a row and before Icould even get to the what do I
need, my brain was alreadypopping in with things you need
this and you need this and youneed this.
And I don't know about you, butthat's the way.
My brain was already popping inwith things you need this and
you need this and you need this?
And I don't know about you, butthat's the way my brain works.
A lot of the time there's a lotof noise going on in it and I
just kept asking myself thatquestion and then, when I

(03:03):
realized that I wasn't reallygetting anywhere, that it was
still that me interruptingmyself in my mind with that, I
stood up and I closed my eyesand I just started to sway a
little bit and move some.
And I've talked about the factthat when we move, that can
really help to.
When we move our body, it canhelp to get things unstuck in us

(03:25):
, and it it's something that youjust have to try and see how it
works for you.
But it's amazing the way thatour bodies and our minds they're
very connected.
And so I began to sway and justlet things bubble up for me a
bit.
And then I slowed my breathingdown and I practiced the quick

(03:49):
coherence technique which, ifyou haven't heard me talk about
that, it's a heart mathtechnique that is very simple.
You can use it to to just getyour breathing and your heart
rate into better coherence.
And so you're just taking slow,deep breaths in through your
nose, out through your mouth.

(04:09):
You're just breathing a littlebit slower, a little more deeply
than you normally would.
And as you do that and you getinto that natural rhythm, then
you begin to focus yourbreathing into the area around
your heart and while you do that, you're thinking of and
re-experiencing a feeling ofsomething regenerative,

(04:31):
something pleasant, somethingthat you enjoy and that can be a
particular memory.
It can be a place or a pet, butit's something that, as you
experience that, you just beginto feel that sense of peace,

(04:58):
that you just begin to feel thatsense of peace.
And as I did that, then whatcame up for me was what I need
most right now is to record thepodcast, get it edited so that I
can work on my social mediaposts and my emails on the way
to the lake, so that I havethose ready to go for the week,
so that I'm able to enjoy mytime at the lake and also not be

(05:23):
stressed out during the week,because I have the things ready
that I need to have ready.
Now, that's not the only thingthat I needed to have done, but
earlier I got the things readythat I need to have ready.
Now, that's not the only thingthat I needed to have done.
But earlier I got the housestraightened up, I got the
laundry done, I made sure thatmy clothes are ready for
tomorrow and that I haveeverything ready to go for
tomorrow so that I can get upand shower and head to work

(05:44):
without feeling like, okay, I'vegot all these other things that
I need to take care of beforethat.
But this was the thing thatfelt like, okay, maybe I
shouldn't go to the lake becauseI still have these other things
to do.
But working through thatquestion, what do I need most

(06:05):
right now?
It was twofold what I need isto get this podcast done and get
everything set up, and what Ialso need is that time to relax,
enjoy myself and get morementally and emotionally ready
for the week ahead.

(06:26):
So I hope this is helpful andI'd love to hear how you work
through those times when you'rethinking, okay, I've got so much
to do and I just don't knowwhere to start right now and you
just get that kind of paralyzedfeeling or that overwhelmed
feeling, and so you can hitreply if you're listening to
this on Buzzsprout and drop me aline or feel free to email me

(06:48):
at Jenny Lytle, at JennyLytlecom.
I would love to hear from you.
I check all my emails and Irespond to everyone.
Thank you so much.
Until next time, remember selfcare isn't selfish.
It's essential if we want tocontinue to care for others and
live our best lives.
See you next week.