Episode 43: The Service Couple: Being an RCAF aircrew service couple and flying in the CH-149 Cormorant and the CP-140M Aurora - Paul and McKayla Goddard

What is it like to be an RCAF aircrew service couple? Paul is a CH-149 Cormorant pilot and McKayla is a retired ACSO who flew on the CP-140M Aurora. Hear all about their experience as a service couple from dating at RMC to the trials of being unmarried and long-distance, to finally the ups and downs of being a married service couple in two busy trades. Join us today on The Pilot Project Podcast to hear all about their story!

Episode Transcript

Bryan (00:29):
Alright. We're ready for departure here at the pilot
project podcast, the best sourcefor stories and advice from the
pilots of the RCAF. I'm yourhost, Brian Morrison. With me
today are my good friends, Pauland Mikaela Goddard. Paul and
Mikaela, welcome to the show,and thanks so much for being
here.

Paul (00:43):
Thanks for having us.

McKayla (00:44):
Yeah. We're happy to be here.

Paul (00:45):
Happy to be back.

Bryan (00:46):
Yeah. Listeners may remember Paul from our Cormoran
episode and Mikaela from ourepisode about the pilot world
from the exposes perspective.Paul is a current RCIAF pilot,
and Mikaela is a retired aircombat systems officer or ACSO,
also known as navigator or nav.Today, we're going to discuss
life as an aircrew servicecouple. So, Paul, we've been

(01:06):
down this road before, but whatwas early life like for you, and
what led you to joining theRCAF?

Paul (01:11):
So I grew up in, BC on the West Coast and, joined the Air
Cadets when I was 12. Wentthrough the gliding scholarship.
Didn't do power because itconflicted with the report date
for RMC. But that's really howit started as I was an air
cadet. I knew that I wanted tofly.
I wear glasses or contacts whenI'm flying. And I had not

(01:36):
thought that it would bepossible for me to join the
military. And then when theylowered the vision requirement
to V2 from V1, so perfectcorrected vision instead of
perfect uncorrected vision,that's when I thought that I
would apply. Turns out when Igot in anyways, I was V1, so it
wouldn't have mattered. Butyeah.
Yeah. But that was a hugeperceived barrier for me was,

(01:58):
well, I don't see perfectly, soI can't be a military pilot.

Bryan (02:01):
So you must have been pretty thrilled when they
changed the rules and I guesseven more thrilled when you
found out you were V1.

Paul (02:06):
That's right. Yeah. It was, it was a watershed moment
for me.

Bryan (02:10):
Yeah. Mikaela, same question. Where are you from and
what led you to join the RCAF?

McKayla (02:15):
I have a pretty similar story. I am from Cochrane,
Alberta, so just outside ofCalgary. And I initially joined
Cadets because my twin brother,Zach, joined Cadets. And, he
joined because he wanted to gethis his license to fly. I think
he wanted to do, like, poweredflight.
And, turns out he ended up doingmore like the survival route

(02:37):
stuff, and I got my glider'slicense. So, by the time that I
got into high school, like,grade 11, grade 12, I couldn't
really decide what I wanted todo in terms of a job. And so I'd
had all this this exposure tothe military, and I was like,
oh, navigator looks really cool.And I actually I was not one of
those that signed up as a pilotand then got bumped to

(02:58):
navigator, which I know is a lotof people's stories. But I
actually wanted to do navigatorbecause I didn't want to do
flying as my like, piloting asmy job because I enjoyed it as a
hobby, if that makes sense.

Bryan (03:11):
For sure.

McKayla (03:12):
Although I didn't really continue gliding after I
got in because I had negativetime. So, you know, it all turns
out like that. But yeah. So,again, like, cadets had a big
influence on me and, also just,like, having a job that was so
unique was really appealing too.

Bryan (03:28):
That's funny you say that. I was gonna ask if if you
had any dreams of being aprofessional pilot or but that
just wasn't your thing. Hey?

McKayla (03:35):
Yeah. It really wasn't like a everyone always jokes
that, like, navs are all the fitwashout pilots, but we I
genuinely thought the job wasreally cool. And I knew that I
wanted to work in a group. Like,I didn't wanna be a solo, pilot.
And I if I hadn't gotten intomilitary, I didn't have plans

(03:58):
to, like, pursue flying as ajob.
I was gonna keep it up kind ofas a hobby and then do something
else. I can't even remember whatI was signed up for in
university, but I think it waslanguages.

Bryan (04:11):
So, Mikaela, how did the two of you meet?

McKayla (04:15):
So, Paul and I both went to the Royal Military
College in Kingston, and he's ayear ahead of me, but we ended
up in the same squadron. So thecollege divided. At the time, it
was 13 squadrons when we werefirst there. And, so we ended up
in the same squadron and he wasa year ahead of me. So during,
the first month or six weeks atthe college, you go through

(04:35):
something called the first yearorientation period or FYOP.
And you're brand new to themilitary. You're brand new to
RMC. You're having to learn allthis stuff and do kind of what
people picture as, like, bootcamp. Like, you're up at five
doing, you know, physicaltraining and then you're
marching everywhere and you haveto wear a uniform and you have

(04:57):
to salute everybody and knoweveryone's names. And it was
just it was a lot.
But one of the things thathappens is the second years get
paired up with the first yearsas kind of like their support.
And there's this illusion thatwe get, they sneak in to give us
stuff, but the staff always knowthat the second years are coming
to help us out. But yeah. So,this particular I think we were

(05:18):
about two two and a half weeksinto biop, and, my roommate had
gone with the varsity soccerteam to go, on an away game. And
all of a sudden, we get yelledat, get outside of our rooms,
and we're told that my roommatewent AWOL.

Bryan (05:35):
Can you explain what AWOL is?

McKayla (05:36):
Yeah. Sorry. Absent without leave. So they told us
that she didn't get on the buswith the rest of the soccer
team, and she just, like, peacedout and went home. And she'd
been having a bit of a hardtime, like, as we all were, but
they pushed it enough that itwas convincing that we thought
it had actually happened.
So we were told that we weregoing downstairs into the

(05:57):
squadron lounge, and we're gonnasit there and wait, and the MPs
were gonna come and talk to us,the military police, to figure
out where she was. And, so, ofcourse, in our minds, this is
totally legit, and they wouldnever lie to us. And so we are
petrified. Right? Like, we wehave no idea what's gonna
happen.
We don't know any of the rulesyet. So we're all sitting at

(06:17):
attention in the lounge, andit's it's dark. Like, it's kind
of in the evening. We don't knowwhat's gonna happen. And then
all of a sudden, what is itcalled?
Discovery Channel by theBloodhound Gang? Is that the
song?

Bryan (06:32):
It's, it's I think it's Bad Touch.

McKayla (06:34):
Oh, bad yeah. Bad Touch by the Bloodhound Gang gets
blasted from behind us, and thisrandom group of people that
we've only seen from afar comein wearing the most ridiculous
costumes we've ever seen. Like,I'm talking, we had, like, a six
foot four guy wearing, like,this red lace nightie. We had
people in eighties tracksuits.We had somebody in, like, a

(06:54):
bumblebee costume.
Like, it was just ridiculous.And, of course, we have no idea
what's going on. Our staff hasdisappeared. Turns out this was
what's called bathrobe nightwhere you get these costumes
that you have to get dressed into run to the bathroom to shower
during the days. It's justanother I guess it's supposed to
teach you time management, butit was really just ridiculous.

(07:15):
And so that was the first timeat Paul because the second years
are get handing over theirbathrobes to us. And so that was
the first time that we everreally interacted.

Bryan (07:23):
What was Paul dressed as?

McKayla (07:26):
Honestly, I can't remember. I was so I was so
relieved that my roommate wasn'tactually AWOL and I wasn't going
to get interrogated by themilitary police, but I it's all
a blur, but

Paul (07:36):
Knee length, pink cotton dress with like mid bicep
sleeves. It was horrible.

McKayla (07:44):
It wasn't the most scandalous outfit, but it
definitely was, something.

Paul (07:49):
There's a reason this tradition doesn't happen
anymore. But it was, at thetime, it was meant to inject
some levity into the whole, youknow, super serious experience
of we're showing up at thecollege and we're in the
military now, and you're goingthrough this I don't know for a
lot of us, it was like, probablythe most adversity we'd faced so

(08:09):
far. And it's the beginning ofyour life as an adult and away
from your family and that. Andso it's just really hard to make
that transition. And this is oneof those things that we did.
And like I said at the time,it's intended to inject levity
in it. And also, like I said, Idon't think this tradition has
survived.

Bryan (08:26):
No. Probably not. But I can see how it was just meant to
light lighten things up. Right?

McKayla (08:30):
Yeah. And it was hilarious because we had you
know, you'd get told, okay. It'stime to shower, so you get
whatever thirty seconds it wasto change. So you're, like,
whipping out of your clothes. Ihad, like, this eighties
windbreaker tracksuit that I hadto get into, which, by the way,
is very hard to get on when yourskin's wet.
So you get into it, and we'd allbe standing outside our rooms
looking absolutely ridiculous.And then it starts a timer or

(08:52):
whatever for the shower andstuff. So you go racing down the
hallway, and, like, you'd haveyour two or three minutes
shower, whatever, race back.Everyone's just looking a hot
mess, like and you have, like Isaid, like, guys in, like,
dresses and there was a silknightie at one point. He had to
wear shorts with it though.
So it was much too small forhim. Anyway, but it was just it

(09:14):
was ridiculous. But at the time,it was just another annoyance
that you had to, like, do andget through.

Bryan (09:20):
Were these robes, like, just for Faye Op?

McKayla (09:22):
Yes. Oh, yeah. Thankfully. As soon as FYOP was
over. So as soon as we did our,the obstacle course and the
badging ceremony and everything,we got for whatever, like,
normal bathrooms to go to thehall because we we had shared,
like, it was communal showersand bathrooms and stuff.
Right? So there's a guys and agirls, but you you didn't have,

(09:43):
like, your own bathroom in yourroom or anything. So, yeah, you
gotta wear normal normal things

Paul (09:48):
after that.

Bryan (09:49):
And how long is FYOP?

McKayla (09:50):
I think it's including the two week orientation period
at the beginning that doesn't,that also involves, or at the
time involved other ROTP cadetsthat were going to different
universities. It was about sixweeks, I think.

Paul (10:02):
That sounds right. I think it starts in the August and it
goes until the September forreunion weekend when the
obstacle courses run.

Bryan (10:09):
It sounds like, really hard, but also like kind of fun.

McKayla (10:13):
Yeah. Like looking back at it, you're like, Oh my gosh,
That's that's so dumb. Like,it's so funny and dumb to look
back at, but during the time,like, during the moment, you're
really in this competitivespirit because all of the first
year flights at the differentsquadrons are all in
competition, right, to win thetop flight and you're training
for the obstacle course andeverything. So it's very much
like, it just takes over yourwhole world while you're there

(10:36):
too. Because you're also notallowed to leave the college at
the time.
Like everyone lives on campus.You're not allowed to live off
campus. So there was just like,it was a very insular kind of
phase where you're just getting,like, really deep into what it
was like to be at the college.

Bryan (10:51):
Were there rules about, like, cell phones and things at
the time?

McKayla (10:54):
Yeah. Oh, yeah. You had to report. Like so at the end of
school or whatever, you wouldget your cell phone for a bit,
and you'd have to, like, go inand report, and you'd you know,
you say your, like, your servicenumber, your rank, your squadron
name, your flight name, andwhatever, and you'd get, like,
half an hour with your phone orsomething like that. So my
parents used to say that, they'dsee my number come up and they

(11:15):
put me on speaker phone, andthey wouldn't even say anything
because I would just, like,rapid fire off whatever had
happened and tell them all theridiculousness.
And then I'd be like and belike, okay. Now I gotta go. Bye.
Love you. And they would, likeand, of course, I had just
joined the military and so hadmy twin.
And so they were trying to learnall the acronyms. And RMC has
its own set of acronyms. Mybrother is in the army. So they

(11:37):
they didn't understand anythingI was saying, but they were
there for moral support, whichis the important part.

Bryan (11:42):
So, Paul, what's your side of that whole interaction
of meeting Mikaela and that thatnight?

Paul (11:48):
So for me, it was just like another thing that we were
doing to help out the firstyears and, like, welcome them
into the squadron and help themfeel like there is one) a light
at the end of this tunnel thatis fire up and two) we're there
for them as the second years.Again, Mikaela mentioned there's

(12:10):
the illusion that the staffdon't really know what's going
on or this is somehow hiddenfrom them and we're doing it on
our own, but it's purposeful.It's all part of it. It's part
of the team building exercise.So, yeah, I mean, I, at that
point, like, hadn't reallypicked her out of the crowd as
being any different to me thanany of the other first years.
So it was just part of thatexperience.

Bryan (12:32):
Okay. So when did the two of you first start to take
notice of one another?

McKayla (12:36):
Well, one of the perks of being in the band at RMC was
that you didn't have to domorning PT. Morning more like,
morning runs, which I'm a hugefan of. So I and also I had done
bands, like, all the way goingup through school. So I joined
the band, and Paul was alreadypart of it.

Paul (12:53):
For similar reasons.

McKayla (12:55):
Funnily enough, neither was like running. And so we, I
started joining the band. So wewould walk over together in the
morning, or sorry. I would marchbecause I was a first year and
had to march everywhere. Butwe'd go over in the mornings,
and then, I also joined thestage band, which was kind of
like a jazz band that would playat different events, and Paul

(13:17):
was part of that as well.
So I think that's when we firststarted hanging out Yep. More.

Bryan (13:23):
And just for the listeners quickly, if you're
hearing any odd noises whileMikaela's talking, Paul and
Mikaela recently had a baby. Sobaby Noah is sitting with
Mikaela right now and

McKayla (13:36):
And he's he's piping up at the restaurant.

Bryan (13:38):
He's making his presence known. So, you may hear that
from time to time and that'sjust life as new parents.

Paul (13:44):
Yeah. And we really got to know each other more through the
band, I would say, more thananything else. We were both,
doing arts degrees, but again,being in the same squadron in
the same hallway, and, and doingband really is how we ended up
getting to know each otherbetter.

Bryan (14:02):
So what was each of your initial thoughts when it came to
dating someone else in the RCAF?

Paul (14:08):
For me, it wasn't that train of thought at all. I was
at university and yeah, I was inthe military and everyone around
me was in the military, butreally it was a university
experience more than a militaryexperience, from my perspective
at the time. And, I was there todo school. So from my

(14:28):
perspective, it was more datinganother student. And the fact
that we just had these otherlayers on top of it was neither
here nor there.

Bryan (14:38):
Okay. So you weren't like you weren't really thinking
about maybe the complicationsthat might come with it or
whatever?

Paul (14:44):
I was too young and too inexperienced in military life
to see the road ahead

McKayla (14:49):
at

Paul (14:49):
all and to understand what might be coming along with that.

Bryan (14:52):
Yeah. And I think that actually sounds pretty typical
though of most people who dateearly in university. Right?
Like, you're not necessarilythinking, like, how is this
gonna work out if we getmarried? And how is this gonna
look in ten years?
Like, you're you're just you'redating.

Paul (15:05):
The fact that we're both Air Force and the fact that
we're both aircrew at the time,like, completely irrelevant.

McKayla (15:11):
Yeah. Yeah.

Bryan (15:13):
What about for you, Mikaela?

McKayla (15:15):
I think I was a bit more aware of it, being, like,
the minority at the college.Because I think there was about
one in five were women, when Iwas there. And so you were kind
of very aware that you wouldeither you're either dating a
civilian, which came with itsown kind of trials, especially

(15:36):
enough as first year because youhad a lot less privileges in
terms of, like, going into townor having free time or whatever.
And you're also adjusting touniversity life. Right?
I think everyone can that's donethat jump from high school to
university, you can kind ofattest to the fact that all of a
sudden you're like, oh, I haveno time. Like, and we had a lot
of extra things that you had todo on top of just school. So it
was either somehow meet somebodyoutside of the college with the,

(16:00):
like, little free time you hador date somebody at the college,
or not date. I guess that wasalso an option. But, at the
time, it was very like, I was abit more cognizant of the fact
that that was a thing.
And I also wasn't, I I wasn'treally thinking about the
future. Like Paul said, itwasn't like, oh, well, how is
this gonna work out? Althoughthat did come in over the next

(16:21):
couple of years that became moreof a factor. But it it was kind
of a given for me that thatwould be the only way I would be
able to date because there justwasn't any time to meet anybody
outside or maintain arelationship outside of the
college at the time.

Bryan (16:37):
Yeah. That makes sense. Like, if you think about it, if
you were if you only had time,like, your parents only had time
to, like, say nothing, put youon speaker, and then you could,
like, like, say what you neededto say, how are you gonna have
time to build a relationshipwith somebody who's not in that
environment?

McKayla (16:53):
Totally. And, like, I didn't have a car or anything
either. So you're either payingfor a cab to get downtown
because, RMC is on a bit of apeninsula, and then you go,
like, across bridge downtown.And there's Queen's University
is right there. We could hearthem having fun when we were not
having fun.
So they're close enough to,like, to hear. But, again, like,
the chance to meet somebody andget to the point where you're

(17:14):
you're dating and exclusive, butthen also trying to explain this
insanity that was happening.Right? Because compared to a
normal university experience,like, my friends couldn't
understand why I wasn't allowedto leave on the weekends or why,
like, I wasn't allowed to justgo downtown if I needed
something or whatever. Right?
So trying to explain that tosomebody while also, like,

(17:34):
getting to know them was justgonna be much.

Bryan (17:36):
Yeah. I think that would be super hard.

McKayla (17:38):
Yeah.

Bryan (17:40):
So, Mikaela, how did you guys first start dating?

McKayla (17:43):
So, we had, like, been getting to know each other. I
had actually was dating someonewhen I first got to the college,
and then that dissolved ratherquickly.

Bryan (17:54):
Was that that was a civilian?

McKayla (17:56):
No. It was somebody else at the college.

Bryan (17:57):
Okay.

McKayla (17:58):
And we'd both we, like, we'd gotten in together and then
realized it wasn't gonna workpretty quickly. So it was spring
time, I guess. We had a littlebit more freedom as first years
because we're coming to the endof our our first year at the
college and, paused me out. AndI was like, sure. And then,

(18:20):
about two weeks later, I waslike, you know what?
I just, it just feels like we'rejust friends. And like, I don't
think I can, like, I don't seethis really being romantic. So I
broke it off as nicely as Icould, full well knowing that he
lived, like, three doors downand we were gonna see each other
every day for the next threeyears.

Bryan (18:38):
Yeah. So, Paul, how did you take it when Mikaela called
things off between the two ofyou?

Paul (18:44):
It was tough. I mean, like any relationship ending, this
one had the advantage of beingquite new. So we hadn't invested
very much in that aspect of ourrelationship. We both were
friends before, which helped, sowe had something to fall back
on. And, you know, when you'reliving in close quarters with 60

(19:08):
of your closest friends likethat, it, you need to decide how
that's going to go.
And the best way that canpossibly go is being mature
about it. Right? And I decidedthat my life was better with her
in it than without her in it asa friend. So that's my way
forward.

Bryan (19:28):
So that's kind of how you managed to keep a brave face
because obviously you didn'twant to be stuck in the friend
zone.

Paul (19:34):
Exactly. And it was clear that she didn't want to be in
the girlfriend zone either. Sowe had to, we had to figure out
how that was gonna go.

Bryan (19:42):
Yeah. For sure.

McKayla (19:43):
He was very mature about it. He was very nice. And,
the other thing too is, like, Ithink it was just after we had
kind of called it off and wewere back to hanging out kinda
normally after a bit of a break.Some of the older cadets started
calling me missus Goddardbecause we were hanging out so
much and, like, we would be seentogether all the time. So they
started calling me missusGoddard, and that lasted for a

(20:04):
couple years, much to thechagrin of other people that I
dated at the college.
So, yeah. So that, that mighthave been foreshadowing, but who
knows?

Bryan (20:15):
That's funny. So, Paul, how did the next couple of years
go by?

Paul (20:22):
It was mostly a university experience, right? Like, and
trades training snuck into it.Basic training was done by that
point for me. But that's, that'swhat you do is in the summers,
you go away, you do training,and then you come back, and then
you do school. And then you goaway and you do training, and
you come back, and you do moreschool.
And then eventually yougraduate. And you start out

(20:46):
doing life as a commissionedofficer in the Air Force. And
you're a junior secondlieutenant who's just waiting
for trades training at thatpoint. So for me, I had the
advantage of already being alicensed glider pilot. So my
OGT, it was brief.
I was blessed to be in the AirForce at a time when I was in

(21:09):
the trough of the wave. And somy training pipes all lined up
end to end to end. So I wentand, I was in Comox for the
summer, and, I was a gliderinstructor for that year. And
then I went away in thatfollowing October, I think it
was, to Moose Jaw to go andstart phase two on the Harvard.

(21:30):
So, just a series of school andthen training and then right
into pilot training.

Bryan (21:36):
That's a great time to, as an OJT experience, to be able
to go and be a gliderinstructor.

Paul (21:42):
Yeah. Yeah. It was huge to be able to get back to the
program in that way. I did itone summer while I was at RMC,
in the summer that ordinarilypeople do language training. I
had managed to test out by thatpoint.
And so I did it then and I didit this summer following school
as well.

Bryan (22:01):
That's awesome. I spent a summer instructing on gliders
just before university and it'smy time on glider as a student
and my time there as aninstructor were, like, two of
the best summers of my life.

Paul (22:11):
Definitely.

Bryan (22:11):
Yeah. Mikaela, you guys were working professionally at
that time together in thesquadron as well. Right?

McKayla (22:18):
Yeah. So well, in in Paul's last year of school, he
was the for one semester, he wasthe squadron leader, so the,
like, cadet in charge of thesquadron, and I was the admin
officer. And, so that was ourfirst chance to work together
professionally. Like, we'd beenliving in the same place and,
like, quote, unquote workingtogether, I guess, if you wanna

(22:39):
say that. But, this was thefirst time we actually, like,
professionally had to interactwith one another.
And, sometimes it went reallywell, and sometimes it didn't.
But a lot of it was we wouldlike, we were living in the same
hallway. So we'd like roll ourchairs out into the hallway and,
like, yell down the hall for theother person to also come out
and talk about whatever and thenroll her back in. So it was,

(23:00):
like very close quarters workingtogether, living together, and
then we were also still, like,in the band and doing
extracurriculars together aswell. So, like, we were seeing a
lot of each other, and that wasthe first time I got to see Paul
in a leadership role, really ofany substance, I think, which
was really cool to see.
And we got along well enough andstayed friends. So obviously

(23:22):
that that turned out nicely.Yeah. And then that summer, the,
summer of twenty thirteen, I wasalso posted to Comox to do, like
to teach at the gliding school,but I was teaching ground
school. That was my summer OJT.
So we worked together there aswell.

Paul (23:41):
That was our near miss.

McKayla (23:42):
That was

Bryan (23:45):
so when did things start to change again for you?

McKayla (23:49):
Well, like, like Paul said, that was our near miss. So
this summer, that summer I wasnewly single and, we were just
enjoying like hanging out withour friends and, and spending
time in co ops for the summer.Cause anyone that's been there
knows it's,

Bryan (24:04):
like, heaven.

McKayla (24:04):
Yep. And, my parents came to visit close to the end
of the summer and, they metPaul. And they'd heard about
Paul, like, throughout theyears. And so they met him and
they invited him out to come todinner with us. And we were
getting ready, and my mom goes,oh, he's just such a wonderful
guy.
And I'm like, yeah. I know. He'sone of my best friends. And she

(24:27):
goes, well, he's just enamoredwith you. And I was like, mom.
And I did, like, the classic,like, we're just friends.
Meanwhile, my mom's like, yeah.Right? And so they, that's why
my mom became team Paul. Andthat lasted until well, now.
Paul's still one of the favoritechildren in the family. So, but

(24:49):
yeah. So, 2013, it was one ofthose things where we almost,
they almost started datingagain. And then I went back to
the college and, we didn't startdating again. But we kept in
touch, while Paul was doing histraining in Moose Jaw.
And that Christmas, my friendand I actually drove out to see

(25:09):
him and a couple of otherfriends in Moose Jaw, during my
Christmas break. But that waskind of the, where it started to
shift back, kind of a deeperfriendship and more towards like
something romantic. And thenthat actually kind of all kicked
off while Paul was on phasethree, just finishing up in
Portage here. And I was inWinnipeg for my, I was waiting

(25:32):
for my trade training.

Bryan (25:34):
So, Paul, during that time, were you, like, the whole
time sort of hoping things weregonna get together again? Or

Paul (25:40):
Yeah. So summer twenty thirteen, very much so. At some
point you need to move on. Andthat's sort of what I tried to
apply myself to after Mikaylaleft and I was still in Comox.
And, I was very intentionallysingle during phase two.
That is a course that you needto apply yourself fully to,
especially if you struggled withthe Harvard the way that I did.

Bryan (26:01):
Okay.

Paul (26:02):
Shout out to John Vincent for getting me through that
course. And then from there, itwas, onto phase three, became a
helicopter pilot. And, again,still very intentionally single,
having a much better time. Itclicked in a way that flying at
Harvard just never did. Yeah.

(26:24):
So that time was just, asMikaela said and alluded to a
little bit, like a much deeperfriendship, and at times being
okay with that and at times not.

Bryan (26:37):
Yeah. That must have been kind of tough.

Paul (26:39):
Yeah.

McKayla (26:39):
Yeah. He had to watch me make some poor life
decisions. So, and thankfully itwas there for all of them, like
there to be kind of emotionalsupport for them. And we had
started being able to hang outmore because I was in Winnipeg
and he was in Portage, justabout forty five minutes away.
So he and sometimes some of ourother friends would come into

(27:00):
the city, and we'd go do stuff.
Like, we'd go see the, theorchestra, or we'd go to the zoo
or do like two, whatever, justenjoying being by a city, mostly
for the guys, and getting out ofPortage to have a little bit of
a break.

Paul (27:13):
And we went camping on the May long weekend one year and,
Michaela was renting a room froma pilot who was flying in
Winnipeg at the time. And, Iwoke up one morning after this
camping trip because we haddriven back from one of the
parks, to the Southeast OfWinnipeg. And, it was just

(27:36):
absolutely horrendous weather.Like it would have been probably
about 45 or 50 knot winds. Andwith the canoe on the truck, up
top on styrofoam blocks andusing ropes to tie it down on
the other vehicle, we were onlyable to move at about 30
kilometers an hour to get backtowards Winnipeg.
So the one and a half hourdrive, I think it was supposed

(27:58):
to be, turned into like a fourhour ordeal, where, we were in
Steinbeck and literally beggingsomeone for a cargo strap
because Canadian Tire was closedon Sunday. So we had to
literally beg a cargo strap froma guy at a gas station, who was
just there getting gas with hisutility trailer. And that was

(28:21):
what got us there. And anyway, Iwoke up, the next morning, on
this guy's couch who, owned thehouse that Mikaela was wanting
in the room. And he's like, whatare you doing in the couch?
And I'm like, I don't know, man.

McKayla (28:35):
Yeah. So,

Bryan (28:36):
like, it was obvious to everybody?

McKayla (28:38):
Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. No. It was everybody.
Like, at my bachelorette party,there was a banner that said, we
told you so. Like, that's, like,that's how obvious it was to
everybody else. Yeah. So thecamping trip, by the way, it it
was because my birthday's on thelong weekend in May, and I'm
like, I'm gonna go camping. Andwe all know that the long
weekend is either gonna be,like, 30 degree weather or

Bryan (28:59):
Or a nightmare.

McKayla (29:00):
Or a nightmare. Right. And so, we Paul hadn't even come
out with us initially. He wasthinking of coming out the next
day. And when we called him tobe like, hey.
Are you coming out? He was like,there's weather warnings. This
storm. And I'm pretty sure Isaid, oh, it's not gonna be that
bad, but you know what? Youdon't have to come if you don't
want to.
And so despite despite theweather warnings and looking at

(29:22):
the radar and looking at allthis stuff, he still came out to
suffer with us. So that shouldthat also should have been a
clue.

Paul (29:27):
Yeah. The GFA looked like a coloring project. It was real
bad.

Bryan (29:31):
Yeah. And and for any non aviator listeners, the GFA is a
graphical area forecast and itit's, it basically just shows a
picture of the weather and themore colorful it is, the worse
the weather is.

McKayla (29:44):
Yeah. So he he's struggle bust through that. But,
yeah. And then we actually, weactually started dating, like
made it official when, I hadPaul's wings grabbed.

Bryan (29:55):
Okay.

McKayla (29:56):
Which was typical timing, I feel like on my part,
because Paul had about a monthbefore he was moving to Goose
Bay And Labrador.

Bryan (30:04):
So now you guys are starting to date. Mikaela, you
told me that your parents reallyliked Paul, but what were their
thoughts on seriously datingsomeone else in the military?

McKayla (30:15):
You know, I don't think we've actually talked about it
that much, but I think they hadkind of assumed that was gonna
happen. They knew that, like, itwas pretty all consuming. And so
the chances of me meetingsomeone else were were pretty
low. And also, I think theyunderstood too having somebody
that understands what you'regoing through is is helpful.

(30:36):
Right?
So, because they they had enoughof an issue trying to keep up
with all of our acronyms, likewhat was going on and how things
worked. Because to a civilian, alot of things don't make sense,
or are, you know, are hard toaccept that you can't change.
And so, I think that they kindof were, like, assumed that
would happen in some way, Butthey never they never told me

(31:00):
not to. So and they did. I I haddated people that were in a
different service branch, like,in the navy and in the army.
And, I think the closest we cameto, like, really talking about
that was asking, like, so wherecould you guys be posted
together?

Bryan (31:15):
Like, how are you gonna make this work?

McKayla (31:16):
Yeah. Exactly. Without being, like, super blunt about
it. And so and I was I had ananswer. None of them were very
good looking back, but, I mean,I had an answer.
So

Bryan (31:27):
So Paul's graduating his wings course in Portageville
Prairie and Mikaela's startingher ACTO course in Winnipeg, and
that's a relatively short, longdistance option. What happened
next?

Paul (31:36):
So, I had invited her to come as a guest to my wings mess
dinner. And it just sort of feltright. At the time when she
showed up, it was like differentthan it had been before when she
was coming to visit or when Iwas going to visit. And, from
there, it just, it just sort ofhappened naturally that the

(32:03):
friendship just evolved intobeing more than that. So we were
dating and at the time she wasquite adamant that this is going
to be a temporary thing.
This is like, I don't want to dolong distance. And I'm like,
Okay, cool. I've got five weeksto change your mind.

Bryan (32:20):
Why five weeks?

Paul (32:21):
Because that's when my report for duty date was in, in
Labrador. So that was the periodof time that it was going to
take me to do the administrationof packing up what part of my
life is in Portagellar Prairie,moving it to Moose Jaw, packing
up what part of my life is inVancouver, moving it to
Labrador. Meanwhile, doing allof the screening in Moose Jaw to

(32:42):
get to Labrador because it's anisolated posting.

McKayla (32:45):
And

Paul (32:47):
then executing my drive from Moose Jaw to Vancouver to
supervise my load and then toLabrador to start my life in the
operational air force.

Bryan (32:58):
Did you drive from Vancouver to Labrador?

Paul (33:00):
No, I drove from Portage La Prairie to Moose Jaw to
Vancouver to Labrador. That'scrazy. It was crazy.

Bryan (33:06):
I loved it. And all during that time, you've gotta
convince Mikaela to, like, staythe course and keep dating you.
That's right. So what was yourperspective on that?

McKayla (33:15):
So I had told him, like, I had just gotten out of,
like, a longer term relationshipthat was long distance and had
failed pretty spectacularlyclose to the end. And, so I was
like, I don't really know if Iwanna do long distance. I don't
want to, I don't wanna wreck ourfriendship, like, all the corny
lines, right, that you kinda tryto talk yourself out out of
things. And Paul did say that.He said, okay.

(33:35):
Well, I've got five weeks tochange your mind. So in the
midst of all of his driving andcrazy back and forth stuff, he
drove out to Winnipeg from MooseJaw probably three times, which
is like an eight hour drive.Yep. It's no, no small feat to
come and see me and, and spendtime together and actually date,
like go do stuff. And he, youknow, would call me every night

(33:57):
and we would talk about ourdays.
And, he helped me with some ofmy coursework, like, when it
came to, like, prepping forflying and stuff like that. And,
by the time he was driving backfrom like, the last time from
Moose Jaw through to Labrador, Iflew out to drive with him from
Moose Jaw to Winnipeg. He woulddrop me off and he would keep

(34:20):
going to Labrador. And that bythat point, he convinced me to
to give it a go. And I actuallyhad, like, the don't you heard
him talk from one of his friendsin Moose Jaw as we were packing
up the car.

Bryan (34:32):
For you not to hurt Paul.

McKayla (34:33):
For me not to

Bryan (34:33):
hurt Paul. Yeah. Because probably his buddies would have
all known that he'd been piningafter you. Right?

McKayla (34:37):
Yes. Yeah. They'd been present for the pining. And,
pining sounds sad. I don't thinkit was, like, active pining.

Paul (34:45):
It it was, like, constantly on the back burner to
some degree or another over theperiod of time. Right? And like
I said, there were periods oftime where it's like, fine,
we're just friends and that'sthe way that it is. And that's
good. And I'm on this coursethat I need to fully apply

McKayla (35:02):
myself onto.

Paul (35:02):
So it's probably better that we're not dating anyway.
And then there were, there weretimes I was pining more
actively.

McKayla (35:08):
Yeah. So his friend, actually, as we were loading up
his car, was like, listen, Ifyou're not, like, in it to win
it kinda thing, if you're not init for the long term, you
really, like, don't don't stringhim on. Like, don't don't break
up from it, like, with him froma distance, like, while he's in
Labrador of all places. Right?And I I was like, no.

(35:29):
I I get it. Believe me. This waslike, I they've had the past
five weeks to, like, reallyevaluate this and, like, I'm not
I'm not just doing this forkicks kinda thing. But yeah, so
I had to like, don't, don't hurtmy friend. Yeah.
And so then, then we starteddating and it was, and by
dating, obviously like not inperson most of the time, because

(35:52):
Paul was in Goose Bay and thenhe pretty quickly went to Gage
Town for his, operationaltraining.

Paul (35:59):
So my F and E showed up, I think it was almost two weeks
after I did.

Bryan (36:03):
Which is furniture and effects.

Paul (36:05):
And the very next day I was on my plane to Fredericton.
I had not unpacked my houseproperly.

Bryan (36:10):
Crazy.

Paul (36:11):
When I got back from course the week before
Christmas, the first sorry, theweek before Christmas leave, the
first thing I had to do wasassemble my bed so I could sleep
in it.

McKayla (36:19):
Yeah. So, like, he had a quick turnaround and he was
busy. And, despite the fact thathe was flying at, like, a search
and rescue or, I guess, combatsupport quadrant, he was doing
tactical flying engaged town,which, it's not his favorite
thing in the world. I thinkhe'll say It was fine.

Paul (36:36):
The flying was great. The tactics, I knew I would never
need to apply, so I had a reallyhard time playing that game.
Yeah. That's fair.

McKayla (36:42):
So, so he was doing that. I was on my Axo course,
which took about a year and was,like, fully stuck in on that
too. So there was a couple therewas definitely a few nights I
called crying about my lifechoices. But Paul was really
great the whole time. Yeah.
And, like, just super supportiveand because he knew how

(37:03):
stressful it can be when you'reon course. And, like, you kind
of have blinders on. You don'tsee, like, that some things
aren't the end of the world. Sohe talked me down off the ledge
a couple of times.

Bryan (37:15):
So he he said he talked you down off the ledge, but he
also talked you into somethingduring this course. So can you
tell us about that?

McKayla (37:22):
Yeah. So, I'm not sure if the NEV course does it
anymore, but what you used to dois you would fly. It's called an
OUV, an operational unit visit,and you would fly to Halifax,
from Winnipeg. And you getyou're being evaluated on the
flight or whatever, but then youget to go and tour the different
squadrons that you could end upat or the different fleets. So
you'd go to Greenwood to see theAuroras and the Hercules.
You'd go onto the ship and talkto people that were on at the

(37:43):
time on the Sea King. And so youget a chance. Because a lot of
people, when they join, theymight not have had a chance even
to see the aircraft they mightwork on, let alone, like, talk
to somebody about what it's liketo be there. And our instructors
at the school come from alldifferent backgrounds, but it
was still nice to see kind ofthe aircraft you'd be working on
and and what squadron life lifewas like. So we flew at it was

(38:06):
the November, November '20ninth, and we, it coincided with
the Grey Cup, which was inWinnipeg.
And this is important becauseeveryone was grouchy that they
were missing it and that we wereaway for that weekend. So by the
time we landed in Halifax, gotourselves sorted out, went to
Juno Towers, the, like,accommodations we were staying
at, everyone was in a bad moodEveryone was cranky. And Paul

(38:29):
had been like, hey. My friend isgetting posted to Shearwater in
Halifax, and he's drivingthrough. So why don't I come up
for the weekend, and we'll, likeI'll see you when you're done
your touring of the squadronsand stuff.
We can hang out. I'm like,great. This is fabulous. But by
the time I get to Geno Towers,I'm just like mad at everyone.
No one like, in a van full ofnavs, you think anyone would

(38:50):
have helped me navigate to getto Geno Towers?
No. No one did. Everyone'scranky and crabby and no one had
made any plans for dinner.Everyone was anyway, wasn't in a
great mood. And Paul keptmessaging me going, hey.
Like, where are we gonna meet?Should I meet you at a
restaurant? Should I meet youthere? Like, what are your plans
for dinner? And I was like, Idon't know.
No one's planning. And I'm justranting. Right? So finally,

(39:11):
Paul's like, what's your roomnumber? I'll just come to Juno
Towers.
And, so he come he comes to JunoTowers, and he comes in the
door, and I just start rantingabout my course mates and how
they're all nobody's helping,and I can't believe we haven't
made any plans for food yet. AndI'm just just ranting. And I
came out into, like, into theroom, and, Paul went down and

(39:37):
went in for a post. And I guessthat was the only way that he
was gonna get me to, stopranting long enough to do
anything. But yeah.
And then my first I instead ofsaying yes right away, my first
question was, are you serious?As if as if he would joke about
that. And yeah, so that was,that was how he proposed, was

(39:58):
just stop my rant.

Bryan (39:59):
So how was that for you, Paul?

Paul (40:01):
So I'm engaged down on course on TAFO, the tactical
first officer course, where youlearn how to be a first officer
on the Griffin, particularly forone wing, but also the SAR and
also combat support, Griffinpilots get their start there.
And I had decided that I wasgoing to propose that Christmas
in Goose Bay because we hadalready talked about it and she

(40:22):
was already planning to come upfor Christmas. And so I had had
an engagement ring ordered and Ihad couriered it to the Squadron
Engage Town because that's whereI was. I wasn't going to send
the engagement ring to my emptyhouse in Goose Bay that wouldn't
have worked out well. So I hadthis ring, and then I found out
she was going to Halifax.
And I was like, I wonder So Idid a little bit of Google math

(40:46):
and figured out that, you know,I wasn't going to be able to
afford to fly from Frederictonto Halifax and back. And then,
my buddy, Nigel, was texting andhe was like, Hey, I'm coming
through. And I'm like, Can yougive me a lift? Sure. Yeah.
So I got a leave pass, from thecourse director, and I got a one

(41:07):
way airfare ticket for thereturn trip. And I got, I bummed
a ride from my buddy to take meout to Halifax and then just
waiting for the Dash eight toarrive full of navigators and
students and all of that. Andthen, yeah, we ended up meeting
at Juno Tires exactly as shedescribed. And, in the middle of

(41:31):
the rant, it's like, well, it'skind of like, it's burning a
hole in my pocket. It's got tocome out now.
So I went down on my knee. Andwhen she came out, I opened the
ring box for her.

Bryan (41:42):
So how did your friends and family react to such a quick
engagement? Because this wasonly after, like, five months or
so of dating.

McKayla (41:49):
Yeah. And, we well, so anyone that had noticed at the
college was like, oh, finally.Like, they would kind of just
this was bound to happen, andthey finally like, she's finally
come around. But a lot of peoplehadn't actually known that Paul
and I knew each otherbeforehand. So I got some pretty
questioning, oblique questions,I guess, about whether or not

(42:10):
this was maybe a shotgun weddingand if I would need to take some
maternity leave during mycourse, which turned out I was
not for the record.
But yeah. So it was kind of asplit. It was everyone was so
excited, and then the otherpeople were like, oh my gosh. Is
she pregnant? So but once oncethose rumors went to got put to

(42:31):
bed, everyone's pretty excited.

Bryan (42:34):
So now you're an almost service couple because you were
engaged but not married andtherefore not entitled to
benefits. How did that affectthe next couple of years?

Paul (42:43):
So initially it was, you know, just stay the course
status quo, everything is asnormal. I'm still me, I'm still
at my unit and I'm stillrequired to be there and work.
And she's still on her courseand she's still required to be
there and she still needs to gether axle wings and do the thing
in order to make the next stephappen. We spent a lot of our

(43:05):
free time and a lot of ourdisposable income on traveling
back and forth. So, having beenfinished phase three and then
right away to TAFO and thenChristmas leave, I had, I think
it was ridiculous.
I was gone for all Marcheffectively in order to get all
my leave burned before the endof fiscal so I didn't need to

(43:26):
accumulate. And I just went andI stayed with her in Winnipeg
while she was on course. And Idid the, you know, stay at home
spouse thing for a little bitsort of like, you know, is this
actually gonna work? Is thissomething that we can do? Can we
live together effectively?
So we did that. And then it wasjust back and forth. Every time
we had leave, we wouldcoordinate it, we would end up

(43:49):
one of us would fly up or downto see the other. After Mikaela
got posted to Greenwood, thingswere easier because at least we
were in the same time zone.

Bryan (43:57):
And,

Paul (43:58):
we were able to see each other more cost effectively as
well. It was just one flightinstead of two or three in some
cases, to get to Winnipeg fromLabrador. And from there, it was
just being long distance. Andthat was hard. That was hard for
a lot of reasons and for a longtime.

(44:19):
But we always had the end insight that, you know, we're
gonna get married. And wereasonably quickly had set a
date that we were gonna do itbefore I was posted out. And we
picked February, in particularbecause my brother was going to
be deployed on OpUnifier to theUkraine. And one of my very best

(44:40):
friends was doing her degree inAustralia, where she was living,
where she continues to live. Andshe would only be able to come
up in the summer, which is ourwinter.
So it was hard, but like I said,we had that light at the end of
the tunnel. And I was able tosquirrel away a fair amount of
money just living the bachelorlife on my own, but being in

(45:02):
this committed long distancerelationship.

Bryan (45:05):
So when and where did you finally tie the knot and what
did that change for you two?

McKayla (45:10):
So we got married in February, February first '20
'18, and we were outside in themountains in Canmore. And, I I
think Paul mentioned it, but wehad picked the date because that
was when all the the peoplecould make it that were
important to us. Right? So my,like, one bridezilla moment was
if anyone says anything aboutthe cold, I'm gonna lose my
mind. Because this is the onlytime it's gonna work, and this

(45:33):
is, like, my perfect venue andeverything, and it's gonna be
great.
But if anyone says they're cold,they're dead. Like, they're
they're gonna die. No onecomplained. Not even the
Australian visiting from hersummer to to our winter. She was
a trooper about it.
Like yeah. She was great. Yeah.So, immediately after the
wedding, like, that 4AM the nextday, we left for our honeymoon.

(45:54):
Had a wonderful time.
And then Paul went back toLabrador. I went back to
Greenwood and then immediatelywent to Italy for three weeks
for an exercise. And then thatkind of started the kind of
faster pace of operational lifefor both of us. So, I started
going on more. Even if it wasjust like flying, I was flying
more, because I was actually onmy squadron.

(46:18):
I wasn't just just, like, oncourse. And, Paul was flying
more a little more, I guess, inLabrador. And we had a couple
more months until he was due tomove down from Goose Bay. So he
moved down from Goose Bay in atthe April. And he moved a little
bit earlier than we normallywould because he was going on to

(46:39):
his Cormorant courseimmediately.
So, again, like, his timelinesall light up really nicely so he
didn't have to wait, a very longtime. But it wasn't, like,
fabulous timing for me. Butyeah. So he was he was down for
about two weeks in Greenwood inmy little PMQ, and then he went
off to Comox to have a greatparty summer.

Bryan (46:58):
Yeah. And then you guys were able to be posted together
because you were now married.Correct?

Paul (47:03):
That's right. Yeah. So when we got married, we did the
paperwork and I advertised earlyand often that we were going to
get married and this was goingto be a thing, paperwork to
follow because we're gettingmarried on the February 1. First
of February, we're gettingmarried, getting married on the
February 1. Right.

Bryan (47:18):
Because that's right before posting season.

Paul (47:20):
Right? Exactly. So, and we all knew that I was due to
leave. And so my career managerheard that and, I'm getting
posted degree with it. That'sjust the reality of the
situation.
And so I was fully accepting,fully accepting of the fact that
I would probably end up doinglike a penalty lap and wing ops

(47:42):
or, have to be like doing flightsafety for a year or two or
something.

Bryan (47:46):
Some kind of non flying job.

Paul (47:47):
Something because the cormorant is what it is. And the
community is, quite selective,for good reasons about, who they
take. The course for pilots runstwice a year. I was almost
certain that it would be quitefull for quite a while. And, it

(48:07):
was going to be fine.
But they had a slot and theywere happy enough to put me in
it.

Bryan (48:11):
Okay. So that all worked out?

Paul (48:13):
That worked out great.

Bryan (48:14):
And so amidst all this busyness, you guys buy a house.
Yes. And then Mikaela had tomove you two into your house
together.

Paul (48:22):
So the two weeks that you can't miss during your Cormoran
course, you're in The UnitedKingdom at RAF Station Benson
doing the simulator training,and our move date, our move in
date coincided with thattraining. So the three other
guys on my course were all alsoposted that summer. All of us

(48:46):
were on the spring course andall of them got to attend their
move. No. Yes.

McKayla (48:52):
Thankfully, I didn't find that out till after.

Paul (48:53):
I didn't tell her until after on purpose.

McKayla (48:57):
Yeah. I found out at a barbecue once everyone was back
and we met everybody and therewas some, some terse words. But,
so, yeah, I ended up writing toboth, I think, his CO and my CO
at the time that I I would betaking his, relocation leave
because he wasn't here to do it,and I had to move all of his
crap, basically. I said it nicerthan that. But, they were happy

(49:19):
to let me have his relocationleave, which was great.
But I did. I moved So

Bryan (49:22):
they were accommodating at least

intro (49:23):
as

Bryan (49:23):
much as they could be?

McKayla (49:24):
Yeah. It was it was actually a lot easier in terms
of that than I expected. But Imoved my stuff out of my PMQ
into the house we bought, andthen Paul's stuff arrived, and I
had to move that into our houseas well. Shout out to my little
brother for coming with mebecause he also moved he also
drove with me when I moved toGreenwood. And then the next
time he came to visit me, he washelping me move into a new

(49:46):
house.
So, funnily enough, he hasn'tcome to visit since, because I
think he's worried that we'regonna move again. I was

Bryan (49:52):
gonna say he doesn't wanna trigger a new move.

McKayla (49:54):
Yeah. Exactly. But, yeah. So Paul called me, as I
was unpacking his stuff and tosee how the move was going. And
I had opened a box, and ifanyone else everyone knows that
they pack everything.
Right? Well, they packed whatapparently was a garbage pile,
that had Christmas candy fromour very first Christmas in

(50:16):
Goose Bay, like, three yearsago. And also in the box was,
like, the third set of dishesjust from Paul's stuff, And I
was losing it. I was so mad. SoPaul called, and he goes, hey.
How's the move going? And he'sin a pub. And I can hear
everyone in the background. AndI went, I love you. Don't talk

(50:36):
to me.
I'll call you tomorrow, and hungup because I was so mad. And
yeah. So that was how the movewent. It was fine. And and he
owed me.

Paul (50:50):
Big time. Yeah. In my defense, there's like, I don't
know, let's say a 80 places toeat in Oxford and a 75 of them
are pubs.

Bryan (51:00):
Yeah. I've been to The UK. Most people who've worked
out of The UK at all or visited,they know what you're talking
about.

McKayla (51:06):
Didn't make it better.

Paul (51:08):
Sure didn't.

Bryan (51:11):
So how did the next couple years go?

Paul (51:15):
So from there it was really a case of high fiving at
the door. So I've gone oncourses, gone on this or that,
gone on exercises for her, goneon boat camp, gone on mountain
camp, gone on, you know,whatever it is, you're gone. And
so sometimes we were gone at thesame time, which meant that we

(51:42):
were apart for longer than wewould have been otherwise. So it
was a case of just fast paced,young married life and also fast
paced operational air forcecareer stuff happening all at
the same time and overlaying. Soit was a case of, well, when's

(52:04):
your cruise block leavehappening?
I don't know, man. Okay. Solike, should I take this week
off of the SAR schedule or thisweek off of the SAR schedule? I
don't know, man. Okay.
Well then we need to pick one.Because if I want a week off in
a row, I need to advertise thatearly enough. There are four of
us, four FOs on the squadron,which means that I'm working
half of all weekends, includingthe ones I'm not in town for.

(52:26):
Now that has changedsignificantly since then. We
have, when I left, 10 ACs andnine FOs on squadron instead.
But that was their life at thetime. I flew over three fifty
hours the first calendar yearthat I was there at the
squadron, which is a lot for ahelicopter pilot, especially for
a helicopter pilot. So that'show that went initially. And

(52:51):
then from there, we justbasically kept living together,
kept deepening our marriage andenjoying that time. And
eventually it was a case of,well, we're looking at each
other and we're like, Is thisthe time to start having kids?
And it was coming up and it'slike, Okay, well, after this

(53:11):
trip, we're going to go toAustralia and we don't want to
do that with a young child. Andthen the pandemic.

McKayla (53:19):
Yeah. So just prior to the pandemic was probably when
we were most busy because Ifinished my upgrade, to an A
category nav, or it was calledtactical coordinator on the
Aurora. And Paul, had you doneyour aircraft kind of upgrade?

Paul (53:33):
I had done my upgrade to, FO3, which is where you start
doing your acting aircraftcaptain stuff. But I hadn't
really started doing that workin earnest yet.

McKayla (53:45):
And so then that those three months, we between flight
safety courses, we did someArctic or we I did some Arctic
cold weather trials in Resolute.Paul was doing, I think, I wanna
say a boat camp or something. Sowe saw each other over a three
month period for about twelvedays.

Paul (54:03):
Not in a row?

McKayla (54:03):
Not in a row.

Bryan (54:04):
Wow.

McKayla (54:05):
So it was basically like you would do a handoff. So
you'd get home and be like,okay. So the dogs are fine. We
need my dog food, and I'll beback in two weeks. And and also,
can I borrow your toque becauseI lost mine or something like
that?
Right? Sadly, Paul is muchsmaller than I am, so I can't
steal any of his other kit, butI could steal his toque. But,

(54:28):
yeah. And so then as I wascoming back from Resolute, that
was when the world had kind ofstarted to shut down a little
bit. So it was March 2020, March'20 '20.
And, we were in Pearson Airportflying back to Halifax to head
back to Greenwood. And you'reseeing a lot more people with
masks and gloves on, and weweren't really sure what was
going on. We'd been away forabout two weeks, and then, we're

(54:50):
watching the news kind of in theterminal. Like, wow. Okay.
This looks like it's a thing, Iguess. And I think three or four
days after we got back to thesquadron from that, we had the
squadron brief saying, okay.This is what's happening, and
our wing kind of not shut down,but switched to a COVID
protocol. So, which actually waswas a bit of a blessing in

(55:10):
disguise, which I hate to sayabout a pandemic that was so
devastating to everyone, but weended up having so much time
together that we never wouldhave had otherwise. We it was
the longest time consecutivelythat we'd been together since we
were married.
Actually, even probably sinceRMZ.

Paul (55:30):
I think ever. Yeah.

McKayla (55:32):
Yeah. And so initially, I was part of, the standby crew.
So I was kind of waiting to hearif we were gonna get deployed or
not. And, Paul, they had splitinto pools. So the squadron had
split in half so that if half ofthem got sick, the other half
wouldn't

Bryan (55:50):
Mhmm.

McKayla (55:50):
And stuff. And we Nova Scotia was quite strict on the
restrictions. So we were justkind of hanging out at home with
us and the dogs, and we had allthis time. And so obviously we
got pregnant.

Bryan (56:04):
As as many of us did.

McKayla (56:06):
Many, many of us did. Because I mean, what better
time, than a global pandemic?

Paul (56:10):
It really moved up the timeline too. It was like, we're
gonna go to Australia. Oh,Australia is closed. Well, I
guess that's not happening. Sois this the right time now?
Yeah. It is. Yeah.

McKayla (56:19):
Yeah. Well, and I moved the timeline out too. I was a
little bit obnoxious about it,but I kept telling Paul that all
I could that he could get me ababy for my birthday, which is
like and he was like, I'm notgetting you a baby for your
birthday. And then my counter tothat was, well, you're the only
one that can. And then I just Ibasically harassed him into it,

(56:41):
I think, to move up the timelinethat quickly.
And then Owen showed up inFebruary 2021.

Bryan (56:48):
So how did the two of you handle parental leave when Owen
was born?

McKayla (56:52):
So we were lucky enough, like, most like,
everyone can take parentalleave, but the military will top
you up. Right? And so we splitour parental leave. Paul took
the first six months off withme, and then I had six months
after that. So I was off for afull year, and Paul was off for
six months, which was greatbecause that was, like, the only
way everyone still functioned.
I kept Owen alive and Paul dideverything else for us.

Paul (57:15):
And this is before the policy was updated to align with
the EI rules. So we took bothsix months concurrently for both
of us were paid, and thenMichaela took leave without pay
for parental reasons, as opposedto parental leave for the last
six months. So she was just onEI. Okay.

McKayla (57:34):
Yeah. And so then, Paul went back to flying in Jan.

Paul (57:39):
August. August. August, September.

McKayla (57:41):
After Owen was born. And then he was, doing STAR
shift work and we had a sixmonth old. So that was there's a
lot of use of earplugs and, hewas not on the night shift for
the baby for a while.

Bryan (57:54):
Yeah. Like, well, once you went back to work, how was
life as a service couple, with achild when you're both trying to
fly?

Paul (58:03):
Unsustainable.

McKayla (58:04):
Yeah. I think that's probably the best way to put it.
We, because we didn't have anyfamily or anyone close by. We
lucked out that one of my,really good friends was our
daycare because we also didn'tget a daycare spot. Yeah.
So, she watched, she watchedOwen for us, and, her husband
flew with Paul as well. So sheknew what the schedule was like,

(58:27):
and she was so flexible, and shewas really a godsend. But I was
ready, like, with myrequirements to be able to fly
again in February, and my firstflight was in May. Because it
would be something thatsomething would come up and then
I would be like, well, I can'tgo away because Paul's away on a
a boat camp or something. Or,okay, I need to fly, but Paul is
in Cape Breton right now doing arescue, and he's not gonna be

(58:50):
home in time to get our son.
And I'm not leaving him theretill 11PM at night. Like, that's
not that's not something you canreasonably ask even, like, your
best friend, I think, anyway. Sobetween that and then both of us
trying so I was trying torecatted, like, get my category
back, because I'd been off for ayear, and Paul was working on

(59:11):
his upgrade. So the schedulingwas just, like, the worst game
of Tetris you've ever played inyour life. Yeah.
Yeah. So it ended up takingquite a while for me to get my
category back.

Bryan (59:21):
Yeah. That sounds like it would be really challenging.

McKayla (59:24):
Yeah. It was just like a scheduling nightmare. The
other the other issue too isthat we were having
serviceability issues with theAurora at the time, and the the
availability of flights andaircraft was low already. So
then trying to fit me onto aflight with the training, like,
someone that was qualified intraining was also, you know, an

(59:46):
added layer of complexity.

Bryan (59:48):
Yeah. Like, you guys, you as a family had a complex
schedule and the Aurora at thetime was having a very complex
schedule. It's challenging.

Paul (59:57):
And SAR doesn't stop. Right? So when she is
theoretically or hypotheticallygoing to be gone on an exercise,
I either need a nanny or I needmy mom to fly out from Vancouver
and not work effectively forthat time that she's with me. Or
I can't be on the SAR schedule,right? At the drop of a hat, you
can be gone anywhere in theregion, which for Greenwood

(01:00:20):
includes Iqaluit.
So it's twelve hours of flyingthere, you go to bed, the crew
from Gander does the mission,flies a helicopter back to
Iqaluit, and then you wake up inthe morning and you fly the
aircraft back home. That's ifit's simple and quick and easy.
And if it's not, if it's a majorSAR case, you can be gone for a
week or two weeks at a time,again, at the drop of a hat. So

McKayla (01:00:39):
Yeah. And once I got my category back, I would be on
twelve hours standby, right,with the ready 12 crew. So, it
was one of those things where wewere looking at all of our
options. And one of them was toget, like, a live in nanny,
which wasn't a thing that waspossible for us. And then the
other option was for one of usto stop flying, and that was the

(01:01:04):
option we ended up taking.

Bryan (01:01:05):
Mhmm.

McKayla (01:01:06):
So, Paul still really liked his job, and he was happy
to keep flying. I had beentaking airsickness medication
the entire time I was flying onthe Ira, which was pretty hard
in the body. And I realized thatnow that I had Owen, I didn't
actually wanna be able todeploy. It just kind of added
another layer of, like, anxietyfor me to be away from my son

(01:01:30):
for anywhere from, like, a weekto six weeks to eight weeks to
whatever.

Bryan (01:01:33):
Mhmm.

McKayla (01:01:35):
And so talking with, my my chain of command and stuff,
and there there were kind ofoptions. Maybe I could be geo
restricted, so I couldn't deployand that kind of thing, but that
didn't felt very or it didn'tfeel very genuine to me. Like,
it felt like I would be kind ofonly doing half my job, and I
didn't think that was fair toslough that on other people. And

(01:01:58):
so I had been doing my master's.To add on to the complexity of
our lives before kids, I wasalso doing my master's while I
was flying and working and Paulwas working and stuff.
So I graduated just after Owenwas born, in May 2021. So I had
another kind of careeropportunity that I was looking
at. So that's why I was the onethat pulled the plug.

Bryan (01:02:18):
Okay. So you decided to leave the RCAF to pursue other
options. Can you tell us moreabout that?

McKayla (01:02:24):
Yeah. So I I knew that if I wanted to be promoted, past
past major, I think somethinglike that, you needed to have a
master's degree. And, at thetime, I wanted something that
was a little bit different than,all of my work on the Aurora,
which was really technical. Andso I found, a master's of
library and information studies,which is not even remotely

(01:02:46):
related to what I was doing onthe Aurora, but it was something
I was really interested in. So Igraduated from the University of
Alberta with that master'sdegree.
And so since leaving themilitary, I've worked at two
different libraries. And when Icome back from maternity leave,
I'm gonna be the librarydirector here in Portage, for
our regional library. So it'sworked out timing wise really

(01:03:07):
well for me, but it wasdefinitely like a big leap
considering I'd been in themilitary since I was 18. And so
I've, my whole adult life hadbeen in the military.

Bryan (01:03:17):
Yeah. I mean, having just gotten out of the military
myself, it's a huge transition.Did you find it difficult to
leave?

McKayla (01:03:24):
I did in some ways. Like some ways I was really
excited for the freedom that Iwould have in terms of like
being able to have a betterfamily balance of time. But it
was really hard to leave kind ofthat the whole world that I
knew, and it felt like I wasleaving a lot of my friends too,
which turns out not. They're allgreat. And we talk we still talk

(01:03:46):
a lot.
Like, it wasn't it wasn't nearlyas alienating as I thought it
would be, but it was still areally, like, big decision. We
talked about it a lot before itactually happened.

Bryan (01:03:54):
So when you decided to leave, did you feel like that
was pretty much your only optionto move forward?

McKayla (01:04:00):
I think it was our only option to have the lifestyle
that we wanted to have. Soduring the pandemic, being able
to spend so much time togetherand then followed by parental
leave where Paul and I were ableto, like, parent together, and I
wasn't doing it by myself. Itkind of made the idea of high
fiving at the door and handingoff kids between deployments and

(01:04:21):
shift work and stuff, like, justnot not something that we wanted
for our life. Like, ourpriorities definitely shifted.
So I think that in theory, wecould have made it work in some
way.
Like, either I could have takena desk job or Paul could have
taken a desk job, or maybe wewould have found, like, a
different way to do childcare orsomething like that. But in all,

(01:04:45):
like, in all the things wetalked about and all the the
ways we looked at it, that thiswas the best way for us to get
the stability that we wanted forOwen and and the best way for us
to have that balance of beingable to spend time together as a
family. Mhmm. So it ended upbeing the only option for us.

Bryan (01:05:03):
And have you found since you moved to Port Elizabeth
Prairie, Paul's at the school,you're working a job again, but
it's outside of the military.Have you found you've been able
to achieve that balance?

McKayla (01:05:14):
Yeah. I think so. It's been a lot easier. I mean, it
does help that, like, Owen's indaycare now, and right now we're
on parental leave. So Of

Bryan (01:05:21):
course. It feels

McKayla (01:05:22):
like we have tons of time, but, we definitely have a
better balance. Like, with Paulnot being on shift work, he
like, it's predictable. Whenhe's home, we can actually plan
ahead to do things, like, youknow, go camping with his
brother and, their family and,like, do things that we wouldn't
have been able to plan forbefore. So I think so.

Paul (01:05:43):
Yeah. I agree with that. My schedule is a lot more
predictable. It's basicallydaytime, except when it's not.
I'm in Portage, except when I'mnot.
But those are the two defaultstates. And that just was not
true when I was flying theCormorant in Pinoyed. Combine
that with the fact thatMikaela's got a civilian career

(01:06:07):
on the go now, it means that wedon't have to do the career
manager dance of managing ourcareer managers together and
getting them to communicate withone another and actually
listening to us effectively andbeing able to give us what it is
that we want or what we need.That's just not something that

(01:06:29):
was as easily achievable anyway.

Bryan (01:06:32):
We've been talking a lot about your guys' experience as a
pilot and an axo as a servicecouple. Paul, do you think that
your experience as a servicecouple is representative of most
folks experiences?

Paul (01:06:44):
I think that it'll be largely similar, but there are a
lot of different types ofexperiences to be had as a
service couple. There areservice couples where, there's a
rank gradient, and sometimesit's quite large. There are
people I know who are a marriedcouple, one's an officer, one's
an NCM. There are marriedcouples I know who are not in

(01:07:06):
the same element. So one couldbe, Air Force and one could be
Army.
That will be restrictive ofwhere you can live in the same
place. There are people who areboth in the Navy and both in the
same trade. That getscomplicated as well, because how
do you manage the timing ofcareer courses? Where is it that

(01:07:30):
you're going to go next? Whoseturn is it to have the primary
reason for the move?
And who's going to have to finda job? Or who is the Air Force
or who is the Army or who is theNavy going to have to find a job
for to make it work for theother person? One of my
commanding officers in Goose Bayhad a live in nanny because

(01:07:53):
their spouse was also acommanding officer of a unit in
a different province at the sametime.

Bryan (01:07:59):
That's crazy.

Paul (01:08:00):
Isn't it? So that's something that Mikaela and I
decided would not work for us.It's not something that we would
find to be palatable, but forthem, it worked. And it worked
great. And I'm really happy forthem that it did work great, but
that's not what we wanted.

Bryan (01:08:16):
So it sounds like there's going to be some similarities,
but there's all kinds offlavors. There's all kinds of
various experiences out there.And with so many variables like
element and trade and rank andall these different things, like
everyone's experience is goingto be different. Doctor.

Paul (01:08:29):
That's right. Yeah. And largely the things that you're
going to have in common with ourexperience are, well, career
management and child rearing andchildcare and parental leave and
all of those sorts of familyrelated obligations and the
larger institutional CAF, careerexperiences, as opposed to maybe

(01:08:51):
some of the specifics don'treally apply.

Bryan (01:08:54):
So I want to go back to when you were both flying, how
did you handle the challenge oftrips, courses, deployments,
etcetera, that regularly come upin the aircrew world?

McKayla (01:09:04):
Before or after kids? Because it was a little
different, I think.

Bryan (01:09:08):
Let's say before kids, because you were both flying
more regularly then and stilltrying to maintain your
relationship. And I imagine thatwas quite a challenge.

McKayla (01:09:16):
Yeah. We, a lot of times, like, I, I was thankfully
never deployed on, like, a sixmonth deployment or a long term
operation, but I did a lot ofthe short trips. So, like, we'd
go to a week or ten days TLknife or we'd, you know, go for
a couple of days here or thereor a couple of weeks for an
exercise. And then that usuallycoincided with the times that

(01:09:38):
Paul would actually be home andthen he would go somewhere else.
So, we we kind of accepted thatwe were going to spend a lot of
time apart, so we really werepurposeful about the time that
we had together to, like, makethe most of it.
So we got to do a lot oftraveling together to places
that we'd wanted to go. And sowhen we did have leave to like,

(01:10:02):
we did absolutely everything wecould to make our leave line up
so that when we were on leave,we were both on leave at the
same time. And we could both,like we could go do stuff and do
whatever we wanted to and stuff.So it made it more purposeful, I
think, when we were spendingtime together. It did mean that
there were things that a normalcouple would have, like, in the
house that didn't really come upfor the first, like, year or

(01:10:22):
two.
Like, how the kitchen wasorganized. I had just put stuff
in the kitchen the way that Iwanted it to. And Paul was never
really around enough or, like,engaged enough in wanting to
move anything that anythingchanged. But then when we were
home for COVID, we realizedthat, like, oh, well, I've been

(01:10:43):
putting stuff here. I've beenputting stuff here.
Like, just it was almost like wewere roommates in very weird
aspects of, like, oh, well, thisis where I put the towels. Oh,
well, this is not where I putthe towels, and and the silly
things like that. So, but we hadkind of both agreed that, like,
we wanted to push our careersforward. And if there was a big

(01:11:05):
decision coming up about acourse or about time away, we
would talk about it. But,generally, we knew that before
we had kids was the best timefor us to push forward with
that, I think.

Paul (01:11:14):
Okay. Yeah. There are boxes to check as a junior
officer and as a junior pilotand as an FO that you need in
order to progress. And thequicker you can get those out of
the way, as long as it's not tooearly for whatever it is that
you're trying to getaccomplished, so much the
better. And so that is a largepart of why we spend so much

(01:11:34):
time away from each other,because we were both being
career oriented at what I thinkwas the right time in our
careers.
And it, like Michaela said,forced us to be intentional. And
that also paid dividends becausewe weren't at home wondering
what to do with ourselves whenwe had leave coming up. It was,

(01:11:55):
We're going to go and do thisthing. So even when we did have
leave, and we stayed in theprovince, we were doing day
trips here or doing a hike thereor, you know, going out for a
one night staycation somewhere,something like that. So, I think
that it was good for ourrelationship that there was that

(01:12:15):
pressure put on it and we wereintentional about protecting it.

Bryan (01:12:21):
So basically, despite how crazy things were, it almost
kind of forced you into beingsuper intentional about your
relationship as the only way tokind of survive that time.

Paul (01:12:31):
That's right. And that's exactly right. Because survive
that time is exactly what wedid. I did the math one time for
my AFOD course that we were onwhen the pandemic was announced.
And that previous calendar yearfor travel, we had put $18,000
worth of travel claims throughour checking account.

(01:12:52):
So that's all of the hotels thatwe actually had to pay for, not
that were paid for undercontract. That's all of the
taxis. That's all of the perdiem for meals and stuff. No
airfare at all. No hotels thatwere paid for under an exercise
name.
That's just that's how muchmoney

Bryan (01:13:07):
That's the amount of money you had to claim to be
repaid by the military. Yes. Andthat's just a measure of how
much you were on the road.

Paul (01:13:14):
That's right. We spent $18,000 on travel to do our
jobs. That's crazy,

Bryan (01:13:19):
which you are reimbursed for. But the point is, that's a
measure of how busy you guysare.

Paul (01:13:23):
Absolutely. Yeah.

Bryan (01:13:25):
Something that you eventually had to plan for and
something that most militaryfamilies are supposed to have
that a service couple absolutelymust have is a family care plan.
Can you tell us about that?

Paul (01:13:35):
Yeah. So a family care plan is so what happens to the
kids effectively at our stage inlife? Or what happens to the
aging parents that you areresponsible for taking care of
when you're gone? Because youwill be gone. You have to be
gone as part of your job.
So sometimes there's that extracapacity where you can trade

(01:13:56):
your shift, or someone else cango on an exercise, or maybe you
can find a way that the timingof something can shift. Other
times, it's just the way that itis and the way it has to be, and
the thing needs to get done whenit's getting done. And the
answer then becomes, Activateyour family care plan. So what's

(01:14:19):
going to happen has already beenthought out and has been put pen
on paper that, you know, when Xhappens and we need to do this,
here's what's going to happen.And so for us, that answer,
thankfully, my mom's in aposition where she can fly out
from Vancouver to come and bewith Owen while Mikaela's
potentially gone on an exercise,and I'm still needed on the SAR

(01:14:39):
schedule.
But being apart from ourfamilies, most of the continent
away comes with a huge lack ofsupport structure that you can
fill in in other ways when it'sjust a minor thing. There's
always someone around who'swilling to pick up your kids
from wherever it is, andeveryone gets it. You know what

(01:15:02):
I mean? Like, we're all in thesame position and they're happy
to help you out, but you canonly take that so far. And
that's what the family care planis there for us to trap those
instances.

Bryan (01:15:14):
Yep. Did you guys ever have to use yours?

Paul (01:15:16):
We never ended up needing to.

McKayla (01:15:18):
Once I had decided that I wasn't going to be, staying in
the military, so I was in themiddle of a contract. So I gave,
I gave about eight monthsnotice, but I needed to give six
months notice. Right? So, atthat point, it made sense for
the fleet that I was moved intoa different position. So I moved
into a wing ops position thatwas shift work and, had a little

(01:15:40):
bit more flexibility in terms ofbeing able to, like, stay home.
I wasn't deploying. They didn'thave me on the deployment list.
Mhmm. So I knew that I wasn'tleaving anywhere. I was just
rocking a desk for the last sixmonths of six months ish, of my
time in the military.
So that kind of took thepressure off. But had I stayed

(01:16:01):
in, we definitely would have hadto, to activate it at one point
or another.

Paul (01:16:08):
It was inevitable.

Bryan (01:16:10):
So we're talking about times that you'd be apart. What
are some of the craziest thingsthat have kept the two of you
apart?

Paul (01:16:17):
There was a time I was flying a Gryphon back from BC to
Labrador and, I hit a duck withthe main rotor blade. So that
kept us on the ground for alittle while while they were
figuring out, was it withinlimits or not for us to
continue? So we ended up gettingthe deviation to fly to Winnipeg

(01:16:38):
and do some repair work and thencontinue on. But that meant I
was way longer than I shouldhave been.

McKayla (01:16:44):
Which, I mean, if you think about a Gryphon flying
from BC to Labrador, you know,it's already gonna be a long
trip. Yeah. And then and then Igot a call and they were in only
in Alberta. And I got a callgoing, so I'm okay. But and that
we we've had a couple calls likethat.
The so I'm okay, but this thinghappened. And, one of my
favorite ones was, when Paul wasaway, they were gonna do some

(01:17:07):
mountain flying in NorthernLabrador with the Cormorant. And
so the base up there where theywere staying, only has lines,
like, direct lines down to otherbases. It's not like a you don't
have cell phone reception oranything. So I was in my office,
and I was a flight safetyofficer kind of at the end of
my, my time in the military.
And so I I was in my office, andthe phone rings. And I answered,

(01:17:31):
you know, like, four or fiveflight safety, captain Goddard.
And all I hear is, you willnever believe what happened last
night. And, and I knew it was Iknew it was Paul, and I knew to
expect that, like, he he wasn'tgonna be texting me or anything.
And, that's when he told me thata polar bear had beaten up his
cormorant.
And so they weren't gonna beflying for a little bit until

(01:17:53):
they got some parts repaired.

Paul (01:17:55):
So we were told specifically to park the
helicopter on top of themountain beside where the
accommodations are, but wecouldn't. It was in fog. But we
could park it down at theairfield at Cyclic. And so
that's what we did, which iswhere we were that was a
refueling point. And so that'swhat we ended up needing to do.
So we landed, shut down, crewedout, went up the mountain, woke

(01:18:19):
up in the morning, went backdown the mountain, and, they
found, the polar bear had pushedin a couple windows and had
pushed the cover off of some ofthe flotation bags for if the
aircraft were ever to ditch. Sothose now were just sitting

(01:18:40):
exposed to the side of theaircraft having a hole in it
effectively. Yeah. So that was,that was another good one. I
ended up losing contact withlosing visual contact with a
boat while I was hoisting to it,and I damaged a hoist cable.
So that was during an exercise.What else?

McKayla (01:19:01):
The Aurora always breaks when you wanna go home.

Bryan (01:19:03):
Yes.

McKayla (01:19:04):
So I'm just sure you know. So there's been a couple
of times where we were justdelayed getting home. Oh, I
think this wasn't reallysomething that kept us apart
longer than it should have, butit definitely caused a little
bit of consternation. Whenhurricane Dorian hit Nova
Scotia, I was conveniently inNew Orleans on a, an away trip.

(01:19:27):
So when I called Paul, he was onday three of no power, and which
for us at the time meant nowater in our house because we
had a pump.
And I was on a rooftop in thepool. So, you know, there's been
a couple of times like that.Yeah.

Paul (01:19:46):
That was a good one.

Bryan (01:19:49):
Okay. We're gonna try to get these last couple of
questions in while baby Noah iseating because he is starting to
get fussy. So what has been thehardest part of being a service
couple?

McKayla (01:20:02):
So, obviously, like, the time apart isn't fun. Nobody
really enjoys that, especiallyif, you know, if you like your
partner, you kinda wanna spendtime with them. But I think for
us, the hardest part when wewere both in was that we just
couldn't plan anything. Like, wecouldn't plan to be at, our
siblings' birthdays or at our,you know, parents' anniversaries
or any kind of those thoseevents that would be nice to be

(01:20:23):
at, because we didn't know who'dbe working, who'd be flying, if
we'd be home in time and stuff.So I think that was the hardest
part for me.

Paul (01:20:31):
And not knowing when or where or whether you're going to
move. That summer coming up inSeptember, it's like, I'd like
to be able to plan what'shappening a little bit,
especially where as a servicecouple, like you're trying to
coordinate your leave to make itwork so that you can actually be
together for your leave. Thatgot frustrating. Yeah.

Bryan (01:20:53):
What would you say was the best part of being a service
couple?

McKayla (01:20:56):
I really liked, just, like, the support and just you
didn't have to explaineverything to them. Like, so
Paul Paul seemed me, like,absolute worst in many different
scenarios, but, he so it wasreally easy for me to be like,
the plane's broken. And Iwouldn't have to be like, so
this means that, you know, wemay or may not be home tonight

(01:21:17):
or whatever. He would just know.And so then it'd be like, okay.
So he would be like, okay.Great. I'm only feeding myself.
I'm in charge of the dogs. Likeor if I'm flying, then I'll
message our friends to go dowhatever.
Like so it it just made iteasier because you didn't have
to explain everything. So whenyou're already frustrated about
something, you're not alsotrying to like rationalize it to
someone. That was, that was apretty good part of it.

Paul (01:21:40):
On top of that, just being a really effective sounding
board. So knowing what it means,but also understanding what the
implications are and askingquestions back and forth about
like, what do I want out of thislife in the Air Force? And
getting good, intelligentquestions back that are making

(01:22:00):
me think about myself more thanbeing like, okay, well, if it's
A, B or C, like, I choose Bbecause that's what makes the
most sense for family life. It'sa lot more nuanced than, I think
it could be. And I imagine thatthere are civilian spouses that
do this quite well also, butit's implicit in our

(01:22:21):
relationship.

Bryan (01:22:22):
Yeah. Because you understand each other, you both
understand the life, youunderstand the implications of
decisions and all that kind ofstuff. So it just makes it that
much easier.

Paul (01:22:30):
That's right. And we've also been friends for so long
that being married is, I think,easier in some ways, because
there's still discovery to behad for sure, but, we have a
strong foundation to build it onas well.

Bryan (01:22:45):
What piece of advice would you give to couples dating
or maybe starting married lifewith someone else in the Air
Force to have them have asuccessful family life?

Paul (01:22:54):
Talk early and often about the milestones that are going to
be coming down the road.Constantly updating what your
expectations of your lifetogether are going to be moving
forward is key. And keepingthose expectations realistic and
flexible as well. So that's whatI think has been a large part of

(01:23:17):
our success as a couple is thatwe communicate again early and
often about what's importantlong term.

McKayla (01:23:23):
Yeah. And I think that we like you never get stuck in a
plan. Like, because everyoneknows that your plan's not gonna
survive first contact with life.So having like, you know,
initially, this is what wewanted, but, hey. This new
opportunity has come up.
And you know what? It's maybenot ideal right now, but it
looks like it could be good. Ornow I'm interested in this, or

(01:23:44):
it turns out I don't like thisas much. And also being willing
to decide when you're gonna takea turn because it it's rare that
you can have both peopleprogress in their career exactly
as they want to at the same timewithout someone having to give
something. So, when it waslooking like, I was gonna be
staying in, but I was closer topromotion than Paul was, Paul

(01:24:06):
was like, yep.
Great. My next tour is gonna bea desk job here. Like, we'll
stay for as long as you need orwhatever. Like, that was and it
wasn't, like, a huge fightbecause, in theory, Paul, you
know, has been in longer than Ihave and, you know, we we didn't
focus on those kinds of things.It was kind of like, oh, hey.
Well, this is the new in newestinformation we have, so let's go

(01:24:27):
with that. Okay. See how itgoes.

Bryan (01:24:29):
So a lot of communication, a lot of taking
turns, and understanding eachother's situations.

McKayla (01:24:34):
Mhmm.

Bryan (01:24:35):
Yeah. Okay. That is gonna wrap up our chat with Paul and
Mikaela. If you like them asmuch as I do and you'd like to
learn more about Paul's career,you can hear him talk about his
time on the Cormoran on episode27. And to hear more about
Mikaela and life as a spouse toan RCAF pilot, you should check
out episode 23.
Guys, thank you so much forcoming in today. I really,
really enjoyed learning moreabout your story. Like I said,

(01:24:58):
you are on parental leave. Youhave a baby in your lap
throughout this interview. So Ireally appreciate your time.
And, thank you so much fortaking this time out of your
day.

McKayla (01:25:06):
No problem.

Paul (01:25:07):
Thanks for having us, Brian.

Bryan (01:25:09):
Alright. That wraps up our chat with Paul and Mikaela
about being an air cruiseservice couple. For our next
episode, we're gonna do things alittle differently. I'm gonna
sit down and talk with Melissa.We're gonna make a special
announcement, something veryexciting for the show.
For the second half of the show,we're gonna sit down with Mike
Reyno. He's the publisher andowner of Vertical Valor,

(01:25:29):
Vertical Marketplace, Skye's,RCAF Today, eVTOL dot com,
Insight Magazines, and VerticalMRO Conference, all under MHM
Publishing. Mike has a ton ofair to air photography
experience, and he has flownwith every squadron and in every
aircraft the RCAF has. Do youhave any questions or comments
about anything you've heard inthis show? Do you have an idea

(01:25:50):
for a show or would you orsomeone you know make a great
guest?
Reach out to us atthepilotprojectpodcastgmail dot
com or on all social media at atpod pilot project. You also
wanna check out our social mediabecause we regularly post great
videos shot by RCAF members ofour aircraft. Finally, we'd like
to thank you for listening andask you for your help with the

(01:26:10):
big three. That's like andfollow us on social media, share
with your friends, and followand rate us five stars wherever
you get your podcasts. That'sall for now.