From Major League Manager to Youth Sports Mentor: Mike Matheny's Parenting Journey

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Today, we welcome former MLB manager and four-time Gold Glove winner Mike Matheny, who takes us on a profound journey through fatherhood, coaching philosophy, and his remarkable life experiences that shaped both. Drawing from his 13-year playing career and years managing the Cardinals and Royals, Matheny shares wisdom that transcends the baseball diamond.

Not only did he publish the amazing "Matheny Manifesto," but he has a new book out called "The Dad Coach," published by Crown Publishing Group, A Division of Penguin Random House! I got a copy and read it before it was recently released, and it is a book I wish I had had earlier when coaching my son in baseball.  Please pick up a copy if you're a youth coach!

The conversation reveals Matheny's counterintuitive approach to youth sports: "The goal is not trying to get college scholarships. The goal is instilling character through sports to help kids become successful in anything they do." Remarkably, all five of his children earned college athletic opportunities despite this philosophy—or perhaps because of it. Matheny credits his own upbringing with parents who demonstrated consistent love and discipline while never pressuring him in sports, describing himself as having "won the lottery at birth."

Particularly moving is Matheny's account of surviving a subarachnoid hemorrhage in 2022—a condition with only a 1-in-6 survival rate. "I had a renewed sense of urgency," he explains. "What are we doing to make the most out of it and how are we going to make an impact with the days that we have?" This perspective infuses his new book "The Dad Coach," which provides practical guidance for parents coaching youth sports, complete with 75 QR codes linking to resources from former players and practical drills.

Beyond baseball strategy, Matheny offers transformative insights for parents navigating youth sports culture. His advice to let children drive their own athletic journeys while parents provide support without pressure resonates deeply in today's high-pressure youth sports environment. As we chase our own definition of success, Matheny reminds us that the most valuable trophy isn't made of metal—it's the character and resilience built through the journey.

Please don't forget to leave us a review wherever you consume your podcasts! Please help us get more dads to listen weekly and become the ultimate leader of their homes!

Episode Transcript

Speaker 2 (00:03):
Hi, I'm Riley and I'm Ryder and this is my dad show.
Hey everybody, it's CaseyJaycox with the quarterback dad
cast.
Welcome to season six, and Icould not be more excited to
have you join me for anotheryear of fantastic episodes and
conversations really unscriptedand raw and authentic

(00:25):
conversations with dads.
If you're new to this podcast,really it's simple.
It's a podcast where weinterview dads, we learn about
how they were raised, we learnabout the life lessons that were
important to them, we learnabout the values that are
important to them and really welearn about how we can work hard
to become a better quarterbackor leader of our home.
So let's sit back, relax andlisten to today's episode on the
Quarterback Dadcast.

(00:45):
Well, hey, everybody, it'sCasey Jaycox with the
Quarterback Dadcast.
We're in season six and I am,after a quick little snafu on
our pregame recording.
We're going to take two, eventhough people at home don't know
that I do, but I joked with ournext guest you got to be
audible, ready as a quarterbackto roll with it and our next
guest.
His name is Mike Matheny and ifyou're a baseball fan or sports

(01:08):
fan, that name should ring abell.
He spent 13 years in the MajorLeague Baseball world.
He spent with four gold gloves.
He spent seven years managingthe Major League teams for the
Cardinals and also the RoyalsProbably embarrassed my Seattle
Mariners more than I probablywant to talk about.
He's an Ohio native.

(01:28):
Somehow they let him out of thestate and he made it to
Michigan, which I don't know howthat happened.
He wrote a fantastic piececalled the Matheny Manifesto
that actually impacted megreatly when I was 30, I think
37 to 38 years old, and I wascoaching my son's baseball team
that my good friend Kelly Hansenshared with me when I was also
coaching my good buddy SteveSteve Nadell.
He wrote the book called thedad coach, which is out, which

(01:50):
is out now, and I have a copy ofit.
It's fantastic.
It's a book that I wish I hadwhen I was coaching new sports,
because it's it's so much simplethings that most probably
parents don't think about buthave, but the things he teaches
you have a dramatic impact.
More importantly, though, we'regoing to learn about Mike the
dad and how he's working hard tobecome, or how he's continually
working hard to become, thatultimate quarterback or leader

(02:11):
of his household.
So, without further ado, taketwo, mr Matheny.
Welcome to the QuarterbackPodcast, casey.
Thank you very much.
All right, so I want to talkabout the Matheny Manifesto, but
first one thing I always ask myguests is tell me what are you
most grateful for as a dad today?

Speaker 1 (02:28):
Oh wow, healthy kids.
I mean that's one of the things.
As soon as you hear thatthere's one on the way, you're
just overwhelmed with the wholeprocess, but very grateful for
the health of our family, kidsand grandkids, proud of the
young men and one girl, oneyoung woman that she is, and

(02:52):
despite their father and thechallenges of being a
professional athlete, how welltheir mother did in my absence
and being able to handle both ofthose roles.
So that's a lot of complexityinto the answer.
I'm just proud of my kids forwho they are.

Speaker 2 (03:09):
That's awesome.
Well, and then, and someresearch, they, they all were
fair, fairly talented kids.
It looks like a lot of themplayed division one sports you
had, I think I had an ice hockeyplayer.
You had one got, I think,drafted by the Red Sox, if my
memory's correct.
That's right, that's right,that's right.

Speaker 1 (03:25):
Yeah, it's very.
You know, a lot of that'sgenetic, so I'm very grateful
for the genetics that have beenpassed down, but more so from my
wife's side.
She was a two-sport athlete atMichigan.
Her dad had a little bit oftime in the NFL and so the
athletic thing kind of happenedfor us.
And it's funny because youmentioned the Matheny Manifesto.
The bulk of that book reallytalks about hey, the goal is not

(03:47):
trying to get these kids to goget the college scholarship.
That shouldn't be the goal ofyouth sports.
And then all five of mine endup being recruited to play
college.
Sports is the whole theory.
Let's go out and really try toinstill some great character

(04:07):
qualities that happen throughsport to help them become the
kind of people that are going tobe successful in anything they
do.
And, by the way, I think it'sgoing to help them become as
good athletes as they can be.
So very proud.
All four boys played baseballin college and my daughter,
katie, played four years at theOhio State University and very
proud of how they all tookadvantage of the gifts that they
were given.
So cool.

Speaker 2 (04:29):
Well, I'm grateful I'm going to copy you, sir.
I'm grateful my kids health too.
I got a son who's playing golfin college right now and I have
a daughter who's a junior inhigh school, who's a scrappy
little five four point guardshooting guard.
I always say she's the toughestone in our family.
Sorry, ryder, my son he'sprobably not gonna like me
saying that one, but she is bro,she is scrappy and I'm inspired

(04:53):
by.
I'm inspired by both of them andit's actually what I'm also
grateful for is just that whenyou see your kids, all the hard
work you do and you think about,like what you wrote about in
the Matheny manifesto and eventhe things you wrote about in
the dad coach just characterbuilding skills and mindset and
you know powerful emotionalintelligence based skills that I
think are too often not talkedabout enough, that I think it's

(05:14):
a cool that you, uh, you did areally good job of bringing them
out and, um, it's just fun tosee when your kids, um, just
start growing and maturing likewait, whose parents are yours?
Like did I really produce that?
So it's been kind of it'shumbling to see them kind of
just grow up and see the peoplethey're becoming for sure.

Speaker 1 (05:32):
Yeah, I think it's just such a great ride, life in
general, but how sports itreally integrates with
developing humans and we talk alot about anytime we get a
chance.
The importance yes, be all thatyou can, whatever it is that
you're going to do.
Whatever you put your hand todo, do it with all you got, take

(05:52):
it as far as you can.
I spoke to a high school team afew days ago and I said you
know, play the game until theypry the spikes off of your feet,
because life will be there onthe backside and keep enjoying
it and have fun and play as longas you can.
That's not the aim when westart talking about some of the
statistics.
The statistics are reallydriven to help the parents and

(06:14):
help coaches stay focused onwhat success looks like For me.
I've had the privilege of nowbeing asked to perform the
wedding ceremonies of four ofthe kids that I coached in the
youth space before I startedmanaging in the major leagues.
That is huge to be able to benot just part and be a coach,

(06:34):
but to be a part of what theythink is some of the most
memorable time of their life.
To then invite you into theother time afterwards that's all
optional and to have thosekinds of connections, not just
with some of the kids thatyou're coaching but also with my
own kids and then, as you said,casey, to see them and just
thrive and figure things outthat I believe it doesn't always

(07:00):
come it doesn't happen forevery kid where they figure out
some of these life lessons thathelp them overcome.
But I think sports give you anadvantage.
I think they give you a headstart If you go in with the
right mindset and go in withunderstanding that we're going
to learn life here as well assport and as they combine

(07:21):
together, I think it fastforward some of the lessons that
they will end up needing asgrown adults.

Speaker 2 (07:27):
Yeah, I joke, I couldn't tell you when the War
of 1812 was, but I can tell youthat all the things I learned
from playing sports, you knowthe adversity, the goal setting,
the visualization, the, youknow showing up for early
morning workouts, um, the, theteamwork, like all those things
I apply I mean no, no offense,all the academics, people that

(07:49):
taught me things.
I mean I definitely a littletongue in cheek to everybody,
but so much of the adversity Ilearned in sports helped me in
the corporate world, sports wise, and I reflect on that often.
And, um, you know, for me theschool taught me like discipline
, time management, management,but like the grittiness of like
sports.
There's just so many, so manylife lessons that I think people

(08:11):
who are listening at home canprobably relate to.
And that's why I think youthink in corporate America so
many people look to hire peoplewho have either played high
school or college sports becausethey know what it takes to go
through those journeys.

Speaker 1 (08:23):
Yeah, and I would say it's an and proposition in
baseball right now.
They're looking for the peoplewith the intellect to be able to
handle the information with anever-evolving game and for us,
shame on us as former players ifwe're not going out and
educating ourselves tounderstand what it is that's

(08:44):
next on the horizon, to where wecan use some of the experiences
that we've had and show theintellectual capacity and
capabilities of being able totake that information and be
able to turn it around intouseful instruction to the next
generation.
So I see and I appreciate howanalytical our world is and how

(09:05):
analytical the baseball sport isright now.
It's needed, there's acompetitive edge, but I do
believe some of that experienceplays in as well and you can
mesh the two.
They don't have to be exclusive.

Speaker 2 (09:19):
Yeah, no, I agree, it's amazing how much the games
change, and even I mean, and itjust wait to see what happens in
20 years, we'll be thinking Imean, it's scary to see what's
going to, what's going to happenwith the impact of AI in the
world.
But, um, well, I would love to,um, if you can take me inside
the, the, the Matheny huddle, um, I'd love to know where you and

(09:41):
your wife met and then maybejust kind of briefly just talk a
little bit about each child Iknow you're so proud of.

Speaker 1 (09:48):
Yeah Well, I'll give you a longer version maybe than
what you wanted, but it's a coolstory.
When I met my wife Kristen, Iwas drafted out of high school
by the Toronto Blue Jays, andthat was back on the day with
corded phones.
I sat by the phone for threedays waiting for it to ring
during the draft of 1988.
And the phone never rang afterdifferent scouts telling me I

(10:11):
was going to be drafted in acertain area, and so I was very
discouraged.
I finally get a call after mydad had given up sitting around
the house waiting to celebrate.
He went and took my littlebrother to a baseball game house
waiting to celebrate.
He went and took my littlebrother to a baseball game.
And I get a call from the WalkieBrewers that tell me that oh
yeah, by the way, we drafted you.

(10:31):
I'm like, oh yeah, this is amonumental deal to me and thank
you very much.
I was drafted so late in thedraft they just didn't even tell
me what round, so I still don'teven know what round it was.
I'm certain that round doesn'texist today.
So anyway, I'm going throughthe process and trying to decide
.
I'd already signed my letter ofrecommendation to the

(10:52):
University of Michigan and Ilook forward to coming back to
that conversation.

Speaker 3 (10:56):
It was a great decision.

Speaker 1 (10:57):
But I wanted to play pro ball and I valued my
education.
I was a good student allthrough high school.
I knew Michigan was going to bea great challenge.
It would be a fantastic degreeto have, but the end game was I
wanted to play pro ball and sowe went through that summer and
I was 17.
I started school early and so Igrew four inches and over from

(11:20):
the end of the school year tothe following fall and the
Toronto Blue Jays kept followingme and they kept kind of upping
the offer of the school year tothe following fall, and the
Toronto Blue Jays kept followingme and they kept kind of upping
the offer to the point where itactually got to be around
second round draft money, whichwas significant money to
somebody who'd never really hada penny in their entire life.
And so I'm leaving for schooland they told me they said well,

(11:42):
we'll make this one final offer, but we want you to know we
have rights to you until youwalk into that first class.
So I logged all this away, I goup, I get my books, I'm all set
to go, and they told me to callwhile I'm walking out the door
to my first class.
So I've got my brand new jeanjacket on.
I feel like I'm looking reallygood.
I got my backpack.

(12:02):
I call up the Toronto Blue Jaysand I thank them for having the
faith in me and seeingsomething in me.
But I really believed I neededto go get my college education.
In the meanwhile, I've beenliterally on my own praying.
I need some wisdom here, becausemy parents aren't making this
decision for me.
This is mine.
I walk out of my dorm room, Itake one step and there must

(12:25):
have been a pigeon the size of aturkey on the roof of that dorm
and it hit me right on top ofthe head and it was Nickelodeon
style.
I had pigeon poop all over meto the point where I had to go
back and start all over Shower.
New clothes, no new dean jacket.
And I was thinking you know God, I've asked to be given some

(12:47):
signs before, but I neverthought that that was going to
be one I would get.
I honestly sat there and lookedin the mirror and said is this?
Am I supposed to go to pro ball?
Ended up, walked to class.
Nobody else was even on thestreets because everybody was on
time except me, but in the veryfront row was a blonde.
As I arrived late to my firstclass, in the front row was a

(13:09):
blonde from St Louis who endedup being my wife of now 32 years
.
So it was a very good decision.

Speaker 2 (13:15):
Wow, Now does she remember that story as well as
you do.

Speaker 1 (13:20):
She didn't know any of the backstory.
She just remembered there was acreepy guy that bothered her
for a few years until I finallywore her down.
That's all she remembers ofthat.

Speaker 2 (13:28):
Nice, nice.
And then talk about the kids,and I think you have some
grandkids too.

Speaker 1 (13:34):
I heard you say, yes, we have number seven and eight
on the way right now.
So, yeah, we started early andthe kids have all started early
too.
Our fifth one will be marriedat the end of this summer, so
they'll all be married off Very,very proud of our kids, for

(13:54):
what each of them have been ableto do, and also the spouses
that they've chosen and watchingthem do their thing.
We just had three of thegrandbabies down here in South
Florida, where we are now, andso we had them for a week, kind
of get them out of thesnowbabies down here in South
Florida where we are now, and sowe had them for a week, kind of
get them out of the snow upnorth and the cold.
But just watching them now beable to choose to spend time

(14:14):
with us is a great reward as aparent.
And we have one still incollege.
The youngest, blaze, isfinishing up chiropractic school
in Dallas.
He's doing a great job, but therest are jumping into real life
and figuring things out.

Speaker 2 (14:29):
Wow, Now maybe touch on each sport that they played.

Speaker 1 (14:36):
So Tate was the oldest Tate played.
He was actually a verycompetitive hockey player and I
wrote in the first book how weactually let him quit baseball
and we constantly told the kidsthat this is your thing and it's
not fun.
If it's not something that youwant to do, don't feel like you

(14:56):
had to do it, because I did andhe wanted to take a break
because he wanted to focus onice hockey.
And he was a very good AAAamateur player, played in Canada
, played in Sweden, got tobounce around and probably would
have been able to go on andplay collegiately.
Just a very good athlete.
A year that was actually aboutsix months later he decided he

(15:18):
wanted to get back into baseballand jump back in, ended up
being drafted.
He went to the Missouri StateUniversity and played and being
drafted by the Boston Red Sox,he made it up to AAA.
He played professionally forsix years, which is a great
career and very, very talentedplayer.
Our second is our daughter,katie, who played at Ohio State

(15:42):
the Ohio State, as I'm forced tosay, but she played all four
years there and was captain hersenior year.
And just an incredible anotherincredible athlete Just given.
Just God-given ability and thatfire and tenacity and fight,
and that toughness, hockey,suited her real well.
She hasn't hardly been on theice ever since.

(16:04):
She's got two babies at homeand is an incredible mother and
married a young man who was myoldest son's college roommate,
also a baseball player, tylerHarris, who ended up playing at
Miami of Ohio.
So we got little jocks all overthe place.
The third, Luke, started outplaying at Oklahoma State.
He pitched there for two years,didn't get a lot of innings and

(16:26):
he was just kind of seeing thewriting on the wall and spent a
year at JUCO in Houston and thenended up transferring and
finishing getting his businessdegree from St Louis University
and pitching there.
The fourth, Jake, started atIndiana and he's our only
catcher in the bunch, so he gota little bit of time at Indiana

(16:48):
but joined his brother at JUCOand then finished at Mizzou at
the University of Missouri.
The fifth, Blaze, was recruitedand played just in the fall at
Missouri State and realized thatthat just wasn't his calling.
And, man, were we proud of himto make that decision.
That's a lot of pressure whenyour four older siblings are all

(17:09):
playing sports and he'stalented, but it just wasn't for
him and so he left MissouriState and now he's at Parker
University down in Dallas andhe's not too far away from
becoming a chiropractor.
And he's the one that's gettingmarried to a beautiful young
girl named Alexa at the end ofthis summer.
So Tate has number four on theway.

(17:32):
He has his fourth child on theway.
Katie has two Luke, I thinkthey're trying to make that
happen.
They've just been recentlymarried, he and Annabella, and
then Jake has his second on theway and due almost any day now,
and Blaze is engaged.

(17:52):
So they're all kind of figuringout their own thing right now.

Speaker 2 (17:56):
So cool.
It's actually impressive, dad,that you know the family very,
very well.
That was actually I mean youshould, but it was actually
usually if there's that big afamily, it's like can I wait,
how many kids do I have?
That was actually I mean youshould, but it was actually
usually if I.
If there's that big a family,it was like can I wait, how many
kids do I have?
And it's like that was prettyimpressive.

Speaker 1 (18:08):
Yeah, we've lost a couple of times.

Speaker 2 (18:12):
So real quick, before I get into some serious, tell
me how does a guy from Ohiobecause there's I met a lot of
people that you're from Ohio butthey're diehard Michigan or
they're from Michigan or they'reOhio state I'm like I don't get
it.
So maybe walk me through yourstory.

Speaker 1 (18:25):
Yeah, and there is no love loss.
Um, for, for those who don'tunderstand the Michigan, ohio
state thing, um, so grow.
I grew up probably 15 minutesfrom campus and the the short
story of it is there was anothercatcher in town who was head
and shoulders better than I was.
He was a grown man and he wasso developed.

(18:48):
Once again, I was a yearyounger, I started school early,
but it didn't matter, he wasjust better.
This guy was big, strong, couldhit the ball a mile, could
throw the ball really well, andso I was really sitting in his
shadow waiting to see where hewould go.
But in all honesty, I probablywouldn't have gone to Ohio State
.
Anyhow, I was ready to go outof town.
I was recruited to Michigan,but Michigan was waiting to see

(19:11):
where.
This young man's name was, mikeDurant, and Mike had a great
career, ended up making it tothe major leagues with the Twins
, but it was either going to beNebraska or Tennessee or
Michigan were going to be thethree I was waiting to see.
And they were all waiting to seewhere Mike Durant was going to
go also.
So once he made his decision,michigan was my choice.
Once again, I took a lot ofpride in my academics and I knew

(19:34):
it was a very challengingschool.
I had no idea how challenginguntil I got there, but, very
proud I can tell you thatthere's not because of the model
of baseball, professionalbaseball.
Your leverage in the draft isgoing to be your junior year and
that leaves you with at leasttwo semesters and usually three
to four after you leave.

(19:55):
And it's hard to come back inan off season because your
professional season if you dosign as a junior in September,
school's starting and you'restill playing minor league
baseball.
So there's a lot of logisticsthat make it difficult.
But the university worked wellwith me and sort of the
Milwaukee Brewers of allowing meto skip winter ball and to be
able to go back and finish mydegree and that's one of the

(20:17):
things I'm probably most proudof.

Speaker 2 (20:20):
Wow, very cool, ma'am .
Well, I'm sure you got a goodBob Uecker story too.

Speaker 1 (20:28):
You know, uecker was without question the funniest
man I've ever met.
Without question, and it justcame so naturally to him.
You weren't going to sayanything and you're probably
going to have a stomachache fromlaughing.
When you spent any time withUke, he and I hit it off.

(20:48):
He was a catcher and Iencourage anybody out there who
doesn't know much about Bob Ukerjust go look up some of the old
Carson clips.
You can just see how quick andwitty this guy is
self-deprecating.
He was a good player, he was agood catcher and I'm going to
tell you he was a voice for meand that organization.

(21:08):
I couldn't hit my way out of awet paper bag.
Euchre wasn't much of anoffensive player either, but he
could catch and he could throwand he recognized that about me
and wanted to make sure that BudSelig, our owner at the time,
and Phil Garner, our manager atthe time, and Sal Bando, our
general manager at the time.
He wanted to make sure thatthey all understood that there's

(21:29):
a place for a player like thisand I always felt that Uke had
my back.
But we spent a lot of timetogether in the outdoors.
Uke was a big fisherman.
Probably my biggest memory was9-11.
It was just two of us on hisboat in Lake Michigan when
everything went down on 9-11.
But what an ambassador for thegame.

(21:51):
Bob Uecker was for the city ofMilwaukee but for the game of
baseball, and yeah, I'll misshim.

Speaker 2 (21:56):
Yeah, rest in peace.
Him and the movie Major Leaguemight be some of the funniest
one-liners of all time.
I mean, what a, what a beautyand um, I did not know that you
had that close relationship withwhich I'm actually glad I
mentioned that.
It's really really cool to hearthat.
That side of him and and um,well, before we get into some of

(22:18):
the book and and and and someof the actual takeaways, I'm
always intrigued how, what waslife like growing up for my
guests?
And so maybe talk, talk to meabout what was life like growing
up for you and the impact yourmom and dad had on you.

Speaker 1 (22:31):
Now that you're a dad and a grandfather yeah, I'm, uh
, I I tell people often that, uh, I won the lottery at birth and
um, not that we had so much, wedidn't have a lot, we had
plenty, though I had, um, twoparents, that parents that loved
each other, continue to stillmarried, both still living back
in Columbus Ohio, Cared formyself and my three brothers and

(22:52):
weren't afraid to show us thatthey loved us and tell us that
they loved us, but also theyweren't afraid to keep us in
line and we needed it really bad.
And so they were veryconsistent in how they went
about their business.
I know this isn't necessarily afaith-based podcast, but I'll
tell you they were veryconsistent in what they were

(23:14):
teaching us and exposing us toand how they lived it out and
what a great representation oftrue faith.
And so that was alwaysmonumental as really the heart
and soul of who I am as a personand the most important thing in
my life.
So, watching that happen andthat, mixed with this cool drive

(23:36):
that I had to be sporty, Iwanted to be like you, I wanted
to be a quarterback.
I just had this terrible habitof throwing to the wrong jersey
and I couldn't run out of sightin a week.
So neither of those played verywell into a very long career in
the game of football.
But I just wanted to playsports and so my parents my dad

(23:57):
grew up on the farm in MasonCounty, West Virginia right
where my mom grew up too, just alittle farming, community coal
mining on the river, and theyboth decided that they wanted
something else for their kids,and so dad actually chased
baseball up into Columbus Ohiofor a tryout and had a tryout

(24:18):
with the Pittsburgh Pirates.
He was a pitcher.
Things didn't go well, but hedecided that as the oldest of
eight he had been working hiswhole life on a farm and he
decided he was going to chase adifferent lifestyle.
So he became a heavy equipmentoperator in Columbus Ohio and
worked for the same company forover 40 years and just the way

(24:42):
he went about work anddiscipline and but the
consistency.
We lived in a small home butjust watching them on a daily
basis how they handled conflict,how they handled the
consistency of disciplining fourboys that were always on the
cusp of doing something stupid,and just to how they did that

(25:02):
with humility, wisdom.
And just to how they did thatwith humility, wisdom.
I used them as examples, as theperfect youth sport parent,
because they always would showup when they could.
You know, dad, in the summerwhen work was good, he had to
work, but the minute he got offhe was trying to make it to one
of our games and he'd silentlybe sitting back there and always

(25:26):
a source of support.
And I can't remember one timeof him ever turning me down when
I asked him to play catch.
He had a passion for the gameof baseball.
He always made himselfavailable, didn't go beyond our
means to go and that reallywasn't a thing back then.
All the coaching and all thedifferent specialization with

(25:47):
the training.
But they did what they could andfortunately they got me plugged
in with an incredible coach whohad just finished playing in
the minor leagues, who had a sonmy age.
His name is Ron Golden.
Ron was with the San FranciscoGiants.
I think he got up to AA, but hewas light years ahead as far as

(26:07):
how he coached the game and hewas probably one of the most
impressive things as a catcher.
He was a catcher, his son was acatcher, but he saw something
in me that he allowed me tocatch and moved his son to the
middle infield.
How many dads do that anymore?

Speaker 3 (26:24):
And his son.

Speaker 1 (26:25):
Eric was a fantastic player, went on to play at
Central Florida but probablywould have been a really good
catcher as well.
But I didn't think of it at thetime.
But over time and as a dadrealizing the humility it took
for Mr Ron Golden to allow me toplay that position, while that
was his son's and his positionas a professional player, so

(26:48):
they put me on a track and westarted playing a lot of games,
mostly because we didn't takefamily vacations.
It just wasn't a thing that wecould do.
So the summer I'd play as manybaseball games as he'd put in
front of me and I loved everysingle one of them until it
ended, and then it was straightto two days through it ended,
and then it was straight totwo-a-days through football
season and then it was straightto basketball until spring
baseball rolled back around.

(27:09):
And I'm so grateful that I grewup in a home that nurtured,
fostered and encouraged get outthere and go play, go play and
figure stuff out.

Speaker 2 (27:21):
Now does mom?
Did she work or she stay athome, keeping you guys out of
trouble?

Speaker 1 (27:25):
Yeah, mom worked at our church, so she was a
secretary at the church, whichbranched into a missionary
branch that she still works for.
She shows up every day andsupports and kind of directs
funds to missionaries all overthe world for Christian
ministries.
And the sweetest lady on planetEarth and probably the biggest,

(27:51):
truest, purest fan or she justloved to watch us compete.
She loved to watch us have funand, once again, if I'm to draw
up what it looks like to be areally good youth sports parent,
it's the parent that does whatthey can not more than they can
and not to put crazyexpectations except go out and

(28:12):
play and to hear, then to hearmy mom say I love watching you
play today.
And that's exactly what a kidneeds to hear.

Speaker 2 (28:22):
Spot on, have you?
Are you familiar with the namebruce brown?
I'm not, so bruce brown, um ishe is?
He lives up in my neck of thewoods, up he's, um, I'll say,
north of seattle area.
And bruce brown wrote anarticle called the car ride home
and he ended up speaking aboutit and his mentors in life were
guys like dick vermeil, um, um,john wooden people might have

(28:49):
heard of him, you know, and hespoke on stages.
So he actually, so he wrotethis article, that car at home.
He actually you.
You reference it in in the dadcoach and, uh, when I, right
about the time I read themethani manifesto, I also got
about this car ride home article.
And so, fast forward, maybe twoyears ago, I realized when my
high school, my college buddyplayed for coach Brown in junior

(29:12):
high and I say, mcfadden, canyou any chance you can get me to
Bruce Brown?
I loved it, cause I think, likedads need to hear, any parent
needs to hear, like the car ridehome is what it's about, you
know, and I make the joke likewhen I have a bad day at work,
my son or daughter's not tellingme how many words I didn't type
per minute or my, I didn'treally talk to my boss as well
as I could have, or God, youknow what happened when you

(29:35):
filled up your water, the waterbottles you make it a little
slower than usual.
You know, I'm not gettingtorched, 're gonna just let them
have it and judge them.
It's like that crushes theirconfidence.
And so what bruce wrote aboutis he wrote about that and he
and many, many kids and I'vetalked about this often this
podcast is kids love when theirgrandparents come, because

(29:55):
that's what they say.
Man, I love watching johnnyplayer, I love watching suzy
play, and so I I connect withbruce.
He came on the show.
So you guys, guys, have that incommon.
You're both former guests nowand I, uh, I talked to him and I
said you know what, what a giftthis has been I love.
Can I, can I drive up and buy alunch?
He goes.
No, you can't.
I was like no, I get it.
You probably get this requestall the time.

(30:15):
He goes, but if you want todrive up, I'll make you lunch.
I'm like I'm in, and so I tellmy wife and she's like wait, who
wait?
What's this guy?
He's like 70.
I'm like honey, I'm going tomeet like Yoda.
Um, this is like the wisdom ofcoaching and youth sports, and I
don't know how I'm going toapply it in my business life,
but I just want to be able to gospend some time with him.
So I went up there.
I spent five hours with the mic, wow, it was awesome.

(30:38):
So, um, if, if you want, when Iget done, I can connect you
guys, he'd probably want tocheck this thing out and it
might be at least a door.
If you're open to it, I'm morethan happy to connect you guys.
But mainly because youreferenced kind of the theme of
it in the book the Dad Coach.
You know, one thing I'mintrigued about is so you know,

(31:00):
I don't know how you found out Iplayed football in college.
So thanks for at least makingme feel a little bit about my
washed up self here.
But I find that people whoplayed sports in college or the
pro level not not perfectly, buttend to be a little bit less
intense about expectations,because you know how hard it
goes into it.
I don't know if that's just atheme, but I'm.

(31:21):
What I'm intrigued about yourstory is, I mean managing at the
major league level, the egos,the hard work, the money, I mean
all these things, and yet youthen know were you successful
that level?
But I actually think in life,the work you're doing now,
teaching parents how to coachkids, is going to be a bigger

(31:41):
impact maybe not fiduciary butlike a bigger impact than
anything.
So I'm just curious, like maybetalk us through that, that
mindset of how did you kind ofshift expectations down from you
know seeing the cardinals downto you know billy at age eight,
who can't catch a ball at thirdbase?

Speaker 1 (32:01):
yeah, and and I appreciate you saying that and
I've told people because I getquestioned all the time you know
, are you retired?
And I'm like, I'm 54 years oldman, I've been fired.
I'm not retired like in ourbusiness.
I'll never forget it.
The day I got the job managingthe cardinals whitey herzog, the
legendary manager, um, met mefor lunch and he goes hey, you
just gotta get it around yourhead that you're either going to

(32:24):
die on the job or you're goingto get fired.
So just go do it the way you'regoing to do it and understand
that this thing doesn't lastforever and don't take it
personal.
And I thought that was suchgreat wisdom.
But how about just a smack inthe face on day one of the job?
Um, but, but I didn't go in, uh, to playing the game.
I I gotta to tell you, wheneverI talk to young players, I beg

(32:46):
them to enjoy it more than I did.
I had to grind and I'm gratefulbecause it gave me such an
appreciation and talk aboutbeing able to have empathy for
how hard the game is.
I felt like every and this isnot an exaggeration that I felt
like this one, this game thatI'm playing, even year 13 into
my career.

(33:07):
This might be my last one andit gave me an edge of how I had
to go about it, but I could.
There are so many kids thatplayed against me, I'm sure at
almost every level it was likethat guy really wasn't that good
good, but there were littlethings that I did right and I
found out what the game neededand how I needed to go about my
position in a way that I couldbe a contributor to stick around

(33:29):
.
And so next thing, I know Iturn around and had a long
career and then I had nointention of actually managing.
I just really wanted to go andbe where I am.
I wanted to be where my feetare and try to impact people
along the way.
It's kind of been my goal fromday one.
Wherever I am, I wanted to bewhere my feet are and try to
impact people along the way.
It's kind of been my goal fromday one.
Wherever I am, you know, god,is this where I'm supposed to be

(33:51):
, and help me not to miss whatI'm supposed to see today and
how I'm supposed to treat peopleand to go about this thing,
whether it's behind the plate.
Then, once that ended, one ofthe gifts that I had was I was
able to walk away from the gameand say that was a great ride.
Now, what, what's next?
And not that I wanted to getout of it.

(34:13):
I'm going to hang on as long asI can, just like I tell kids,
but when that time came, ok,where am I supposed to be and
how am I supposed to impactpeople?
And it just happened to be ayouth team that I didn't expect
to coach, that I didn't evenreally want to coach.
I just told them I don't thinkyou guys are going, you parents

(34:35):
are going to like what I thinkyouth sports should look like,
and it was a little bit radical.
It was certainly different.
I asked them you know your sondoesn't need you to cheer and
believe it or not.
What he needs at the end, youguys go get ice cream you love.
Tell him you love him and tellhim that you'd love to watch him
play.
But in the meanwhile we don'tneed to start packing on
pressure.
Just let him play the game andthen let me let them their

(34:55):
teammates and they're going toput enough pressure on
themselves already.
They want, they want to doreally well.
So let's create an environmentwhere it's all about them,
nothing about us, all about them.
And then just jump in and teachand next thing you know, I get
an opportunity to walk in andinterview for the managerial job
for the St Louis Cardinals, who, when I got that call, it was

(35:17):
two weeks prior.
They just won the World Series.
So I'm coaching 12-year-oldsand the team that just won the
World Series calls a 12-year-oldcoach and asks him to come and
interview for the managerial job.
It's like throwing the keys toa Ferrari to a 14-year-old right
, I didn't get that call Mike.
Yeah, and most people don't.

(35:38):
It's interesting.
People love that story becausethere's little league coaches
all over the country like whyare the mariners not calling me,
you know?
And so um, and rightfully so,and there are some.
There's some great coaches now.
I've been coaching through thesystem.
I was the roving catchinginstructor, I was the assistant
to the general manager.
I had my foot in the door butthere was no lead in, there was

(35:59):
no um, kind of nudge that asomeday tony lara had said that
a number of times while I wasplaying for him and I always
thought like, hey, skip, I'mpretty young, I think I should
still be playing.
Let's not talk about that nextcareer quite yet.
But he'd always alluded to thefact that he thought that there
were characteristics that I hadthat would lead to managing, and

(36:22):
I thought that was a greatcompliment.
Interestingly enough, when Iwas at the University of
Michigan, our head coach wasBill Freehand.
He was a former catcher for theDetroit Tigers, had a great
career, and Coach Freehandcalled me in when he got the job
the first day of my sophomoreyear and he said I've watched

(36:44):
you catch and I got a couplethings for you One, I think
you're going to coach or managesomeday, which was unbelievable
I'm 18 at the time.
And he said I know you're goingto play pro ball, so from now
on all your electives are goingto be Spanish.
And so he had my academicadvisor in and switched
everything along the road.

(37:05):
So I had these little nudgesalong the way about there's
something there potentially, butI wasn't jumping on the fast
track to go do that.
It was all really just laid inmy hands, as well as some of the
things that are going now inthe youth space.
What I really wanted to be is Iwanted to be a light to some of
the people who just don't know,people that are out working hard

(37:27):
in all kinds of industries thatmay not have the insight at the
professional or even thecollegiate level, and to just
let them know, like you're notgoing to be measured by how good
of a parent you are to a youthplayer, by how crazy you are.
That's not necessarily it.
There's a different way to goabout this, and so, just from

(37:47):
interviewing some players that Iplayed with, some guys that I
coached and managed, here's adifferent model, and let's try
and get back to buildingcharacter.
Let's try to get back to yes,let them play as long as they
can, but resetting what we'reaiming for here.
And so it's all just kind ofnaturally laid itself in front

(38:08):
of me, more so than me having anagenda to go try and put this
together, which makes me humblygrateful for the way that things
have kind of unfolded in mylife.

Speaker 3 (38:20):
Hello everybody.
My name is Craig Coe and I'mthe Senior Vice President of
Relationship Management forBeeline.
For more than 20 years, we'vebeen helping Fortune 1000
companies drive a competitiveadvantage with their external
workforce.
In fact, Beeline's history offirst-to-market innovations has
become today's industrystandards.
I get asked all the time whatdid Casey do for your

(38:42):
organization?
And I say this it's simple.
The guy flat out gets it.
Relationships matter.
His down to earth presentation,his real world experience
applied to every area of ourbusiness.
In fact, his book Win theRelationship and Not the Deal
has become required reading forall new members of the global
relationship management team.

(39:02):
If you'd like to know moreabout me or about Beeline,
please reach out to me onLinkedIn.
And if you don't know CaseyJaycox, go to CaseyJaycoxcom and
learn more about how he canhelp your organization.
Now let's get back to today'sepisode.

Speaker 2 (39:20):
Where do you think the mindset of how you coached?
Was that taught?
Was that learned?
Was that innate?
Tell me, where does that comefrom?

Speaker 1 (39:29):
you think yeah, I think I've had great leadership
in my life and I believeleadership is more caught than
taught.
I think the pictures say awhole lot more than the words do
.
And, going from my dad, I justhad some incredible male role
models.
I got to know both of mygrandfathers, both who fought in

(39:49):
World War II and came back asheroes and just put their nose
down and just started to workagain when they got back.
And then Coach Golden, who Itold you about.
All the way through my highschool coach, dave Starling, and
getting into the hands of BillFreehand.
I just had men who just pouredinto me as much as a man as they

(40:10):
did a player, and that stuckwith me.
I even had football coaches.
I had some whacked out ones too.
I mean that just did the crazystuff that happens Enough to see
that's not it.
And then, when I got around theones, and then as I got older
and started researching andstudying, I'm glad you brought

(40:30):
up coach John Wooden.
I say he's the most impactfulcoach of my life and I never met
him, but I think I've readanything he has ever written and
mostly because of thatcombination that you and I
talked about earlier, that andhe he knew that he wanted his

(40:51):
boys to go win every time theywalked out there.
But they're not going to talkabout that.
We're going to talk about theprocess and we're going to talk
about all the, all the littlethings that go into you being
the best version of you, usbeing the very best version, us
chasing perfection, knowing thatobtaining perfection is not a
possibility but the pursuit ofit is.

(41:11):
That, to me, was like it rang,and I guess that's right.
That's how we go about thisthing.
You pursue it all the time, butwe're going to forgive
ourselves when we don't quiteget there, and then we jump
right back in and get better thenext day.
So there were different coaches,different leaders along the way
, all of them having an impact,some of them, like I said, I
learned so much from learninghow I didn't necessarily want to

(41:34):
be coached or how I would wantto coach, and some who just
really, really did it the rightway.

Speaker 2 (41:42):
Yeah, that's funny as you're saying that I mean I got
, I was getting goosebumps andyou think about all the um, like
all the coaches I've had in mylife.
And it's funny as I got a gold.
I'm almost 50 and I still can'tcall those coaches by their
first name.
Yeah, I just can't do it likecoach.
Coach osborne hey, it's martin.
No, it's not marty, it's coachosborne, it's bobalt no, it's

(42:03):
not Marty, it's coach Osborne,it's Bobo no, it's not coach,
it's coach Baldwin.
And I just like my one of myoffensive linemen coach, he's
going to our hall of fame, um,and some guys call him John,
like, no, it's coach Pika.
I just can't.
To me it's out of respect thing, but I think, even like when
I'm wired, maybe that's atestament to my parents or those

(42:25):
, those folks as leaders.
But I hope those are thingsthat like my kids see or other
kids see or, as I hear you talkabout, like coaches that you
know, if there's moms or dadlistening, maybe that's
something that they can get outof this episode too in teaching.
But so youth, youth sports,it's crazy right now.
I mean you got peopleseven-year-old that Johnny's
going to go pro and we got toget them a $1,500 bat and we got

(42:46):
to get them a private jet andan NIL deal before he hits
fourth grade and if they don't,we're screwed.
And obviously I'm jokingeverybody.
But there's I don't know thisgentleman, but I've seen, I
loved it Interview him, dan, Ithink it's Dan Orlovsky.
He's an ESPN guy quarterbackand he's done some work about
recently very vocal on Twittersaying his kids are just going

(43:06):
to play rec and I'm actually youknow what.
Good for you.
And I think there's so manypeople that I think that are
monetizing youth sports.
My daughter plays AAUbasketball.
I mean it's her last year, butwe're going to be in Phoenix,
california, chicago, vegas, andit's like that's what we have to
do to be able to play.

(43:27):
I don't have the other choicesIf you want to play, eventually
get to the collegiate level.
It's just, it's crazy how muchthe game's changed.
So I love your, your thoughtson maybe, the kind of status of
this, what, what are some thingsthat moms and dads could take
from you and your experience,because you've seen probably the
highs, the highs, the lows, thelows, and I think we'll get
into your book here in a second.
That I think gives a lot ofcoaches some tools to help

(43:50):
remind why we're here in thefirst place.

Speaker 1 (43:53):
Yeah, I got to be careful with this one, casey,
because our daughter playingcompetitive hockey we were
flying her to practice inPittsburgh.
There wasn't a lot of femaleice hockey options.
Once she started developing toa certain level and she loved it
and we could afford to do that.

(44:15):
So I have to be careful ofgoing too far down that road.
Because we went down that road.
The one thing that wasconsistent with all five of our
kids is we made sure that theywere the engine pushing that
train.
It wasn't yes, we do know better.
Yes, we can see the landscapeof talent and realize that maybe
our kid is in a spot to betracking in a positive way.

(44:39):
But once we become that engine,then typically there's a bad
wreck waiting to happen.
I think that's probably thefirst point, um, but I, I also.
I know there's some really goodprograms out there with some of
the the elite uh teams and Ithink it's it's got to be a

(45:00):
family decision.
I, I, I would be, hesitant totell anybody.
You know, just stay away from.
And I'm a big fan of DanOrlovsky.
He does some work with TonyDungy and All Pro Dad and I
follow some of his writings andI think it's really good stuff.
And I get it Once again whenyou're looking at the
30,000-foot view.

(45:20):
Developing these kids as peopleis so much more important than
that scholarship.
It just is.
And I think that's where peopleget out, maybe been out of shape
a little bit, and it's onlyhuman, because the more we
invest whether it's our dollars,whether it's our time, whether
it's all of our energy, whetherit's a combination of all of the

(45:43):
above, in most of these sportsthat's what it becomes.
It becomes a huge investmentfor the family and as a
reasonable person, you'relooking for a return on your
investment at some degree andyou are asking some very
immature brains and minds andbodies to go make some mature

(46:04):
commitments, long-term, to ridethis thing out, when they're
usually not capable of makingthose kinds of commitments.
And so you're making this hugeinvestment as an adult,
expecting them to match yourinvestment with their effort and
their drive, when it's just notthere yet.
And there are so many storiesof that and that's kind of been.

(46:25):
Maybe the impetus to the booksto begin with is just relieving
parents of having to be thatengine and letting the kids push
and trying to find someeconomical ways within your
family's means to be able togive them what they need, what's
real, what might be a littlebit of snake oil, and how can we

(46:48):
allow them to go chase theirdream?
Because I'm glad nobody evertalked my parents out of me
becoming a college athlete orout of me dreaming of playing a
major leaguer.
Somebody's going to get there.
Casey, I'll never forget I was13 or 14 playing with that
gentleman, mr Ron Golden, that Itold you about, and we were at

(47:09):
a camp and there was a localcollege coach that showed up and
I'll never forget it was summer, it was hot.
He's wearing this full on redsweatsuit with the team logo on
it and he's sweating bullets,because we're all sweating
bullets out on the turf and hegets up and he starts throwing
out all these huge numbers ofthe likelihood of going to play
at a major university or playingprofessional and he walks

(47:32):
around that that half circle ofyoung men all about my age, and
telling us that we're we'rewasting our time to to make that
as our dream.
And I'm thinking with all duerespect, sir, who are you to
tell me that I can't go try andchase my dream and I never want
to get in the way becausesomebody's going to do it and I

(47:56):
was one of the fortunate few.
There's a lot of things thathave to go in line and I know
I'm getting on a tangent man,but you put me straight on the
soapbox of my life, I believe.
Put me straight on the soapboxof my life, I believe, is how
can I help players and do thatin multiples, by helping coaches
, which are helping parents toget straight, how we're going to

(48:19):
go about this.
Can we do this really complexthing of raising these kids the
right way, teaching them thethings that are going to allow
them to be successful inwhatever they do?
All pull in the same directionwithout sinking our family one
way or another?
And how can we do that whileallowing this young man, young

(48:42):
woman, to chase a dream that Ibelieve it's a good dream.
It's a great dream to go chasea college scholarship.
It's a great dream to go chaseplaying at the professional
level.
I don't want to get in theirway.
I'm not going to be the coach inthe red sweatsuit telling them
they're not going to do it andthat they're foolish for chasing

(49:03):
it.
I believe you're foolish fornot chasing it, and then let
life teach you along the way,but I think you're going to
learn some incredible thingsalong that trail If you keep
your eyes open and you have somegood people around you to lead
you in the right direction.

Speaker 2 (49:16):
No, I love it, man, as you're saying that I think
there's a sign behind me.
People can see this on YouTube.
It's believe and it's aboutbelieving in yourself, believing
in something bigger than youbelieve.
What you do matters.
And I mentioned my buddy, steve,in the beginning, who I coach
with.
I have so many great memoriescoached with him and his son,
riley, just is finishing up.
He's playing hockey on the EastCoast through like the junior

(49:38):
program and he's hoping to kindof keep that journey long.
But when he was my son and himwere like best, but they're
really really still best friendsand I would coach his son, or
Steve would coach my son, andthey would respond better to
each of us versus mom, you know,dad, but he, riley, his son, he
is convinced he was going toplay pro baseball and pro hockey
.
He might do pro golf too ifthere's time.

(49:59):
And you know, not sure.
And never once did they say,did they laugh, did they say it
was just like well, yeah, whywouldn't you?
And I was always so inspired bythat.
I'm like too often I thinkpeople, um, like they don't
enforce or inspire the wordbelief enough, and I think you
inspired me to say to share thatstory because I think it's

(50:21):
there's so many moms are doubt,just because if you didn't do
something or you did like I myson's way better golf than me
was at his age and my daughter'sa way better basketball player
than me I'm like I don't knowwhere you get it.
But, um and I remind them oftenthat I have no eligibility left
Um, I am.
You told me what your goals are.
You gave me permission to askyou questions about if your
goals have changed.
Um, but I don't want to.

(50:42):
I can't do the work for you.
I can still try to not get hurtand just stay in shape at my
age.
But you got to go do the work.
And if you want to do it, I canhelp you get there, because I
know what it takes to be acollege athlete.
It was a lot of hard work.
But if you don't want to do it,then that's okay too, but don't
ever make it my journey beforeI.
Well, let's dive into this.
And I, I loved the book.

(51:03):
Everybody.
I know if you're listening toit you can't, but it's called
the Dad Coach.
It's Mike wrote it with Jerry BJenkins he talked about earlier
.
It's how to lead kids tosucceed on and off the baseball
field as much as a lot aboutbaseball.
I think there's a lot that youactually can get if you either
coach any sport in here.
There's a lot of key takeawaysI think specifically in the

(51:23):
beginning of the book that youcan get.
But I'd love to know cause I Iwrote a book too, mike Um, and I
kind of had that voice in myhead.
So maybe call that a God moment, call it universe, call that
something.
But it was like you got to dothis, you got to do this.
I'd love to know for you whatwas the voice or what was the
tipping point that said I knowI've already wrote the Methany
manifesto, but there's somethingelse I got to get out there.

Speaker 1 (51:41):
Yeah, and and if you'll let me, casey, it's such
a cool story on the first book.
I got to bring that up.
I wrote that letter, I'mmanaging the major leagues and I
kept having that same voiceyou're talking about, about.
Hey, that letter struck a chordwith people.
There are people that there's amessage there that can help

(52:04):
people and all I remember sayingis who are you to write a book
Like?
you're barely hanging on to you,barely hung on as a player, now
, you barely know what you'redoing as a manager, and so I
keep kind of kicking it down theroad.
And then I got to the point of,like you know, it's just fear
of failure and there's somethingabout that that can drive
people and I believe it drove meat times.

(52:26):
But I got to the point ofsaying you know what, I'm here
for a reason and I think I'msupposed to do this project.
So I went and I researched andJerry B Jenkins was somebody who
I'd followed in another coupleother books.
One of them, joe Gibbs, thoughthe did a great job with that.
He did a couple other, as toldto biographies, and I reached

(52:47):
out to him, called him and heactually returned my call and he
kind of listed out this is kindof the way my business plan
works, not to be arrogant, butyou know he's sold 50 million
copies of one particular series,so it's a lot he's wanted and I
saw the number and I'm like oh,um, yeah, I don't think we can

(53:08):
make that work right now, but itwas great talking with you.
Um, hope we meet down the roadsomewhere.
So that was in in Novemberfollowing year was 2013 and our
team went on a great run.
Uh, we won 100 games that yearand I was managing.
And we went to the World Seriesand ended up losing to Boston
in the World Series.
And I remember afterwards we'rein Boston and I look at my wife

(53:34):
, kristen, and I said I knowit's a stress financially to
jump in, but I think we'resupposed to do this book.
I really do.
Two days later, I get anunsolicited email from Jerry
Jenkins that said I think we'resupposed to do this book.
So you don't have to have verymuch insight to realize that we

(53:56):
needed to probably do that, oryou and I wouldn't be in this
conversation right now.
And then really, the follow upfor the dad coach was we had a
number of people that said webuy what you're selling.
We agree that there's somethings that are off track with
youth sports, but I don't knowwhat I'm doing.
You kind of left us hanging onhow we agree that the what is a
little messed up, but how can wego about it?

(54:18):
And so really, the dad coachwas following up on people who
had bought the Matheny Manifestobook which, by the way, I hate
that name of the book it wasn'tmine.
I had nothing to do with that.
I actually tried to talk RandomHouse out of calling the book
the Matheny Manifesto, but italready stuck.
But this new one, this new onewas really all about how can we,

(54:38):
how can we equip some, somesome dads dads that might be,
maybe they just drew the shortstraw and they had no desire to
coach their electricians,plumbers, engineers, firemen,
all across the board but theywant to be there for their kid
how can we give them some toolsto allow them to go take

(54:59):
advantage?
And so I appreciate youbringing this book up because
I'm really excited about it forone thing.
You bringing this book upbecause I'm really excited about
it, for one thing, it's a gift.
I feel like it's our give back,really, to all the proceeds
from this book.
We're building a field in theDominican Republic and we've got
this cool tie with someministries down there that are

(55:21):
teaching sports and especiallybaseball, and bringing kids from
the United States down therefor an experience of community
service plus baseball, which iskind of my life.
But we're also just throwing inthis.
We have 75 QR codes through thebook and we're still populating

(55:42):
those with guys that I playedwith, guys I played against
people I respected, even my ownkids and grandkids, just kind of
just spitballing us.
Here's a bunch of stuff.
Here are the studies.
We did character studies withour kids when we were going
through.
Here are a bunch of the studies.
Take them, do with them whatyou please.
And here's some former majorleague players saying what they

(56:04):
do with their kids.
And here's some drills that Idid with my kids.
I did one the other day.
I taught my seven-year-oldgrandson how to slide and we did
it in my kitchen on the tile.
And, just like you know, it'snot this high level stuff.
It's for, really aimed at dadsof coaches from kids six to 12.
And then, we believe, at 12,like you and I've just been
talking about Casey, there comesa point where there's certain

(56:27):
boys they need to go.
They need to go find a betterplace to where they can really
be pushed so they can maximizetheir abilities.
But for all of them in thoseearly ages, teach them to love
the game.
And for you dad coaches whodon't know much, there's one QR
that it takes a ball, hit inevery spot on the field with any

(56:48):
situation out and runner onbase.
Here's a responsibility forevery player to be.
Every player has aresponsibility.
If you just teach them this,they start to have a sense of
meaning on the team, even if theball never gets to a mall game.
But teaching them things toteach kids to love the game and
then see how far they take it.

Speaker 2 (57:08):
Yeah, that's I love you.
It's so easy that you did that.
There's everybody.
There's cure, like he said,there's cure codes throughout it
.
The other thing that I that Ilove that you talked about that
was a passion for mine and Icoached is don't let kids stand
around, and you and you and youtalked about like stations and
keeping kids busy and and andhaving a practice plan.
Literally.
I remember when I coached Istopped coaching basketball in

(57:32):
sixth grade because I knew thegame was outgrowing me and I
didn't want to be that guy thatlike was doing it for me and I
like thought it was more of aleadership opportunity to kind
of lead by example, saying that,hey, there's better people out
than me.
Now you've played the majorleague, you can keep going, but
I I love that you did that,because too often I've seen
parents that do coaching sportsand just show up and wing it,
they come off their job and I,well, what do you guys do?
All of a sudden?

(57:52):
Kids don't.
They don't respond to thoseenvironments, and I love that
you called it out because Ithink it's really, really
important.
So thank you for doing that youknow.

Speaker 1 (58:00):
You know where the biggest challenge with that was
with the major league guys.
And because major league guys,and because major league guys
would get bored at, you know,right now spring training time,
and you'd go and you'd bestanding in the outfield
shagging ground ball, shaggingfly balls for batting practice
for an hour and it's a waste oftheir time.
Like, how do we keep themengaged?
so I I really learn that morefrom the major league level than

(58:21):
anything else.
Just keep them thinking, keepthem active and then keep them
competing too, because that'swhat so many of them just they
want to do.
Naturally, you play, take agame of catch, getting your arm
loose and you turn it into acompetition.
Watch how much better they get.
So just throwing them littlethings like that.

Speaker 2 (58:38):
Yeah, lastly, before I, before I let you go here and
I take it in what I call ourlightning round, which is fun
for me as the host, you had anear-death experience that I did
not know about and I was doingsome research.
I don't know if you whateveryou feel comfortable sharing.
Is it something that we as dadscan learn about, maybe to
prevent or symptoms that happen?
I mean, that was that was kindof took me aback when I read

(59:00):
that.

Speaker 1 (59:01):
Yeah, and I'll try to keep it short.
A year ago we were snowbirds,with everybody out of the house.
We come down into South Floridausually right after Christmas,
so we drove down on the 15thfrom the St Louis area and we
got to South Florida on the 17th.
I went for a workout normalworkout, no big deal and all of

(59:22):
a sudden something in the backof my head wasn't right almost
the top of my neck and so Icalled my wife and asked her if
she'd come pick me up because Icouldn't even get on my bike and
make it back.
I found out later a couple ofthings.
I told her.
I said just come get me so Ican go lay down.
I did something in the gym.
I found out later two things.

(59:42):
One is she wasn't happy becauseI was making her late for a hair
appointment.
She wasn't happy because I wasmaking her late for a hair
appointment.
The second thing I found outwas if I had gone and laid down,
I would have never woken up.

Speaker 2 (59:53):
Wow so.

Speaker 1 (59:54):
I found myself in the ICU and a doctor came and told
us that I'd had a subarachnoidhemorrhage, which is a bleeding
on the brain, that there'sreally no trauma had caused it
and there wasn't necessarily aclot that had caused it either.
What they do know is it happensin one out of every I'm sorry,

(01:00:17):
six out of every 100,000 peoplein the population.
Three out of the six did what Iwas about to do, and they go
and they lay down and they neverwake up.
They never make it to thehospital.
One of the remaining three, hetold us, will die in this
hospital because ofcomplications.
One of the remaining two willhave lifelong brain damage and

(01:00:39):
we are trying to help yourhusband to be that one.
So, yeah, thanks for the but uh.
So I spent 20 days and I was ashealthy as I'd ever been, maybe
in any time of my life.
Um, but it was just one ofthose things.
And for the next 20 days I wasin bed, um, and uh, finally got

(01:01:00):
clearance, went up to the MayoClinic in Jacksonville, florida,
and had second opinion thereand all the tests did all the
brain scans again and to confirmthat's what it was.
So really nothing that causednothing to avoid either, but it
was one of those that when Iwalked away, casey, I had a
renewed sense of urgency.

(01:01:22):
I had a renewed sense of impact.
What are you doing?
And I was already neck deep inthis book, so the book was
already in play and actuallymost of the pages were already
written, so we didn't get to addreally anything in from that
experience.
But what it's done is it'sgiven me greater insight and

(01:01:45):
appreciation One the fragilityof life that puts us all in
common.
Whoever's following us rightnow they look at you as a
college athlete, they look at meas a professional athlete maybe
think we have nothing in common, but this thing we have.
This thing is veryunpredictable.
What are we doing to make themost out of it and how are we
going to make an impact with thedays that we have?
So I appreciate you bringingthat up.

(01:02:07):
Yeah, it was a wild ride, butman did.
I learn a lot and I canhonestly say I wouldn't want
anybody to go through it, butI'm grateful for some of the
lessons that I was able to learnthrough it.

Speaker 2 (01:02:20):
Wow, that is insane.
You got goosebumps, man.
Well, I'm grateful you're here,I'm grateful you're spending
time with me and, um, as youwere saying that, one of my
favorite four numbers is 1,440,which is the number of minutes
we all get each day.
No one gets more known, getsless.
And so when people tell me theydon't have time to do anything,
I said that's the story you'retelling yourself.
We all can have time.
It's about what you choose todo with your time and that I'd

(01:02:43):
rather be a naive optimist withfocusing on what I can control.
And, um, I I mean, if that's aninspiration for everybody at
home, if there's somethingyou've been thinking about doing
, stop using phrases like I needto, I should do, I want to, and
just say go and will.
You will go coach your son'steam or your daughter's team.
You will go, um, take them fora hike.

(01:03:03):
You will get off your phone.
You will email, answer emailslater, maybe when your kids go
to bed.
But, like the, the time is sucha valuable asset and, uh,
winning time is something that'sa very thing I'm very addicted
to, because it means I'm beingpresent.
And um, uh well, this has beenawesome.
I feel like I want to besensitive of your time.

(01:03:25):
I know you're three hours aheadof me.
Where can people learn moreabout you as an author?
Um, how can we get their thisbook out to them?
Um, both books.
But I want to make sure, causeI'm uh and I call this a call
the serendipitous God moment orsomething, because the fact that
I read the Menthany manifestoand if you'd have told me, hey,
guess what, when you're 49 yearsold, you're actually going to

(01:03:46):
talk to this dude on a podcast,I'm like what I'd be saying.
What's a podcast?
What is that?
So it's serendipitous thatwe're talking about.
How can I make sure we get theword out about this great book?

Speaker 1 (01:03:57):
yeah, it'll be.
It'll be available I believesomeone told me the 25th on
amazon.
We are launching the book onthe 28th, so we're're only about
a week away.
We'll do a launch in St Louisand most bookstores, so we're
very fortunate that the RandomHouse Penguin people have put a
good amount of effort intomaking this thing a success and

(01:04:20):
for us it's just an opportunityto go man.
Every coach that we help has anopportunity to help at least a
dozen kids right, and that's whyI appreciate what you're doing,
casey, when we're out here andI believe very much in what Mr
Billy Graham said, and his quotewas a coach is going to impact

(01:04:41):
more people in one year thanmost people do in a lifetime,
and that inroads of what thesekids are passionate about.
I don't care coaching piano, Idon't care if it's coaching
baseball or football orbasketball.

Speaker 3 (01:04:54):
Whatever?

Speaker 1 (01:04:55):
it is that you're coaching, take advantage of
using that platform to help moldpeople, and what a great gift.
So thank you for what you'redoing, Thank you for including
me, thank you for promoting thisbook and once again, I'm
excited just to see and hearsome of the cool stories on the
backside, because I know it wasdone with the right heart, with

(01:05:16):
trying to just help people andhelp kids, and when you're doing
that man, it's just a fun spaceto be in.

Speaker 2 (01:05:22):
It's a gift man.
Well, okay, we're going to goto what I call the lightning
round now, where I show you thenegative hits.
Have taken too many hits incollege not bong hits, mike, but
football hits and my job is toask you these questions quickly.

Speaker 1 (01:05:39):
Your job is to answer them quickly, but I'm hopeful
to get a giggle out of.

Speaker 2 (01:05:41):
You Got it.
Are you ready, ready?
Okay, true or false?
Your, your idol in baseballfrom a catcher's perspective was
Roger Dorn.

Speaker 1 (01:05:51):
False, false, okay, um, that's favorite major league
player of all time is um,johnny bench going right down
that alley, which, uh, rogerDorn, was pretty fun to watch,
though, For that was a heavysarcasm.

Speaker 2 (01:06:06):
Pray people home.
Roger Dorn is a fictitiouscharacter from the movie Major
League.

Speaker 1 (01:06:15):
Favorite Major League stadium you ever played in.
I loved what was at that timecalled Pac Bell Park in San.

Speaker 2 (01:06:22):
Francisco when it was brand new.
It was beautiful, cool.
Did you ever play in theKingdome?

Speaker 1 (01:06:26):
I did.
I faced Randyson quite a fewtimes there.

Speaker 2 (01:06:30):
Unbelievable, unbelievable experience I grew
up diehard mariner fan.
I'm really proud to say theywere the only major league team,
mike, to never win a worldseries.
It feels really good, but I'mnot jumping off the bandwagon.
I'm not some really really goodteams back in the day.

Speaker 1 (01:06:44):
Man, they were good.
They're fun to watch so close.

Speaker 2 (01:06:47):
If you were to go on vacation right now, you and your
wife, no kids, no grandkidswhere are you going?
We're going to the Exumas inthe Bahamas.
Okay, if I was to come over toyour house for dinner tonight,
you're cooking tell me what we'dhave.

Speaker 1 (01:07:01):
Yeah, it'll definitely be meat and potatoes.
It's a mistake.
Red meat carnivore Uh, my wifewould probably make me mix in a
little bit of salad and we'dprobably have a nice glass of
red wine.

Speaker 2 (01:07:11):
There we go.
Um, if I went into your phoneand um, what would be one genre
of music that might surpriseyour kids?
You listen to ah jazz.
Okay, um, favorite comedy movieof all time is Dumb and Dumber.
So you're telling me there's achance.
Okay, if there was to be a bookwritten about your life, tell

(01:07:35):
me the title.

Speaker 1 (01:07:36):
Oh man Blessed.

Speaker 2 (01:07:39):
Okay Now.
So the dad coach is killing it,the Matheny Manifest is killing
it Now.
Blessed is the new book that'sout and it's selling more than
any other copy ever you've everwritten.
But now netflix found out aboutthey're going to make a movie
about you and this book calledblessed.
But you're the casting director, you.
It can't be you, and I need toknow what hollywood actor is

(01:08:01):
going to star mike methanium,this critically acclaimed, hit
new movie oh man, um man, I'msupposed to have a quick answer.

Speaker 1 (01:08:11):
I've had as many things ahead as you, by the way.
Um, I had jim carrey on my mindbut I'm nowhere near as funny
to to permit that to ever happen.
Yeah, you got me den.
Denzel Washington's my favoriteactor of all times, but that
doesn't fit.
Let's put Denzel behind thedish, I like it.

Speaker 2 (01:08:32):
Yeah, I like it, that'd be actually.
That'd be a fun one to watch.
Okay, and last and mostimportant question, tell me two
words that would describe yourwife, wise and um way too many
words internally externallybeautiful.
We're going to call thathyphenated.
You pulled it off Veryimpressed.

Speaker 1 (01:08:51):
Thank you the lighting round's over.

Speaker 2 (01:08:53):
We both giggled a little bit.
This has been a gift.
I'm so honored that you decidedto share some time with us.
I will do everything in mypower to get the word out.
There's so many coaches thatneed tools, like you took the
time to do it, and I think somany people play pro sports or
play at the college level andthen they, they go on and do
what they do.
But the fact that you, you'relistening to your calling and

(01:09:14):
you're you're sharing your, yourexperience and you're helping
others, um, it's inspiring and Ireally, really appreciate
everything you're doing.
Um, if this episode everybodyat home has touched you, please
share it with a coach.
Please share the book with acoach who wants to make sure
they learn about it.
If you've not taken time toleave us a review wherever you
consume these podcasts, thatwill be a big gift to me.

(01:09:35):
Just know people out there arelistening, but our goal is just
to keep serving one dad at atime and try to create better
humans that enter the workforce,the enter society, and the
three pillars that really driveme to people know are trying to
create more humble humble humans, curious humans and vulnerable
humans.
I think when those, those threeskills are present, we're going

(01:09:55):
to have great culture, nomatter where we go.
So, mike, thank you again somuch for your time.
I'm grateful for you.
Thank you, casey.