Stories of Resilience and Leadership with TedX Speaker - Michael Clegg

Send us a text

What happens when you blend the wisdom of a TEDx speaker with the heart of a dedicated father? Find out as we chat with Michael Clegg, the dynamic CEO of QWorks and Leadership Squared, who also spends his Fridays under the lights as a high school football coach.  As former colleagues at Kforce, it was so nice reconning with a former colleague for a powerful conversation on fatherhood and mindset.

Michael shares touching stories of a recent football recruiting trip with his middle child and an exciting upcoming mastermind group adventure in Austin with his 21-year-old. Plus, hear how he balances his professional life while celebrating 23 years of marriage and his daughter's incredible work ethic.

In this heartfelt episode, Michael opens up about the family dynamics that shape his life.   Michael's journey to personal growth and professional success hasn't been without its challenges. From a memorable, violent incident that forced him to leave home to the transformative experience of preparing for a TEDx Talk, Michael's story is one of resilience and perseverance. He shares the emotional aftermath of past traumas, the solace found in sports, and the incredible support system that helped him navigate life's hurdles. 

Wrapping up with a discussion on gratitude, future aspirations, and the importance of slowing down to appreciate life’s journey, this episode is a compelling narrative of growth, family, and the power of being present.

Please don't forget to leave us a review wherever you consume your podcasts! Please help us get more dads to listen weekly and become the ultimate leader of their homes!

Episode Transcript

Speaker 2 (00:03):
Hi, I'm Riley and I'm Ryder and this is my dad show.

Speaker 3 (00:12):
Hey everybody, it's Casey Jaycox with the
quarterback dad cast, and, as Ipromised, we do finally have a
new and exciting sponsor that'sgoing to be joining us over the
next 13 weeks or so, and they itis called the authentic edge
podcast, which is going to belaunching very, very soon.
It is a podcast that is led bythe fantastic and successful
Jason DeLuca and executive salesand people leader at Dexian, as

(00:34):
well as with a Paul DeFrancenzo, who is a global sales leader
at indeedcom.
This podcast, authentic edge,as I mentioned, is, is launching
in the next month and it'sreally about a journey into the
heart and genuine relationshipsinto the workplace.
So they're going to talk aboutuncovering the profound impact
that authenticity has onestablishing instant trust,

(00:57):
fostering long-term partnerships, as well as creating
serendipitous connections thatevolve into endearing business
and personal relationships,which is exactly how I would
describe my relationship withJason and Paul.
So, without further ado, let'sget right to the next episode
and I hope that you check outthe authentic edge wherever you
consume your podcasts.
Well, hey everybody, it's CaseyJaycox with the quarterback dad

(01:18):
cast.
We are in season five, as youwell know, and we're we're going
to the vaults of cave force, tothe alumni magazine, I had to
go through multiple bookingagents.
Now this guy's a hot, new hotI'm talking real hot, hot, real
hot TEDx speaker everybody.
He's the CEO of QWorks.
He is the CEO of LeadershipSquared, which we'll learn all

(01:41):
about that.
He's a Highlander.
We'll learn more about that.
More about that.
He's a high school footballcoach.
Like I said, he's a formercolleague of mine at k-force.
Um, his name is michael cleggand, with all that stuff said,
we're actually going to talk alittle bit about that.
But we're actually moreinterested to talk to mr clegg
about michael the dad and howhe's working hard to continue to
be that ultimate quarterback orleader of his household.

(02:01):
So, without further further ado, mr Clegg, welcome to the
Quarterback Dadcast.

Speaker 2 (02:11):
Man, it is a honor.
An honor, see, I can't evenspeak right, so no, casey, it's
certainly an honor.
I mean, you have had aprestigious career.
I've enjoyed watching it fromafar and, man, I'm excited to be
here.

Speaker 3 (02:20):
Well, I appreciate that it's going to be fun.
Dude, you got me all jacked upbecause everybody, it's May 23rd
and we're recording.
This episode will be out inmaybe a few weeks or a month or
so and he had his footballjamboree and he made me do 25
burpees.
We may hit the sled.
I'm wearing a football helmetright now.
You wouldn't even know it.
Joking aside.
Okay, we start each episodewith gratitude, so tell me, what

(02:41):
are you most grateful for as adad today?

Speaker 2 (02:43):
Yeah, no, I had an opportunity to go on a
recruiting trip with my middlechild.
He's a rising senior forfootball.
That was amazing, fantastic,starting to explore, actually a
really good time for you to askthis question.
So we had a five-hour road trip, windshield time.
Of course.
On the way back he slept threeof the five hours, but that was

(03:06):
special.
And I get to fly out fromCharlotte to Austin tomorrow
with my 21-year-old and I have amastermind group that I'm a
member of, so we've got anin-person event in Austin, texas
.
So I'm bringing my 21-year-oldto get him some exposure to the
entrepreneurial world with DrBenjamin Hardy, which I'm really

(03:28):
, really excited about, and mydaughter, man, my daughter is in
the process of moving up acouple levels for cheer.
She works unbelievably hard fora 12-year-old.
I don't know, she certainlyisn't getting it from me.
It's got to be all mama.
And then, very blessedobviously, to have a wife.
We just had our 23rdanniversary last week.

(03:53):
So it has been a wild ride.
And I'll tell you, man, what'sthe old saying?
That the days are long but theyears are short.
Man, am I feeling that it's it?
Is it never been truer in mylife?
So I'm very thankful, veryblessed, very blessed, and yeah,

(04:14):
I've got.
I've got a lot of gratitudetowards that long.

Speaker 3 (04:24):
Days are long, years are short, years are short.
Yeah, I've, it's funny, you'relike the third person that said
that in the last, like week.
Yeah, so those are someserendipity in that thing which
is getting me to slow down.
Um, I'd say, what I'm gratefulfor, man is a couple of things.
One I'm I'm solo this weekend.
My wife's heading to the Eastcoast um to check on, uh, we
have a, we have a home out there, which that's another story.
It makes no sense sometimes,but it makes all the sense in
the world.
Um, so I'm, I gotta be.

(04:45):
I get some good kid time.
Um, I'm grateful for a couplethings.
One I'm going to spend someawesome time with both kids this
weekend.
Um, I spent, like I said beforewe started recording.
I got to see my son uh play hislast high school golf match and
just and just watch him competeand have a process and just be
a good person.
And we got to spend time with afreshman shout out to Jake Jake

(05:07):
, I call him Jackie moon.
Yeah, that's awesome, you know.
And he, uh he just looked up tomy son a lot and was fun to see
your, when your kid's a leaderfor another.
It was the best feeling ever.
And then this, the dad of thiskid, like was so complimentary
of right, I'm just like I feltso thankful, like, if, like
cause.
In the end, that's the goal,everybody.
We're trying to create greathumans, regardless if they're

(05:27):
sports or fricking band orceramics, it don't matter.

Speaker 2 (05:31):
Yeah, but that's that's why I love sports, though
.
Right, I mean, you nailed it.
And that's one of the thingsthat I would absolutely say for
Jackson, who is, you know, my 17year junior, rising senior and
he's going to be a four-yearstarter on varsity.
And just seeing his development, from that scared 14-year-old

(05:52):
right who is a freshman andlooking up at all the big boys
and competing to earn a spot, tothe guy now who is showing
other kids what they're supposedto do, and, interestingly
enough, because today was thefinal spring practice, we have
our jamboree and that's when weinvite the eighth graders, who
are the rising freshmen, to comewatch and be a part of practice

(06:13):
.
They don't participate, but andto, to see, to see him and some
of the other kids that I'vecoached, many of them since pop
Warner and it I'll I'll say thisman, in November or December,
whenever this final trip is over, I will be an emotional basket

(06:34):
case.
I remember the last game of myoldest and that was tough.
I was also in the COVID yearand dealing with all of those
things.
But you know my final sonplaying football and I'm very
passionate.
I've coached football for avery long time now and will
continue to coach at some level.

(06:54):
But man, it is remarkable tosee that level of leadership.
It really truly is man.
So that would be.
I'm glad you mentioned that,because that would be another
blessing that I would haveoverlooked.

Speaker 3 (07:07):
There we go.
All right, You've you've.
You've briefly talked abouteach member of the of the squad,
but let's, let's go into thehuddle a little deeper, and I
want to hear about how you andyour wife met, and then I want
to hear a little bit about eachperson of the squad.

Speaker 2 (07:20):
Yeah, so Kelly and I met about a month before I
graduated.
We both went to RadfordUniversity, highlanders, right,
yeah, the Highlanders, gosh.
I was a graduate in 99.
She was a 2000,.
So she had a year following me,which is probably a great thing

(07:40):
that we met a year before Igraduated she probably wouldn't
have married me.
Thing that we met a year beforeI graduated.
She probably wouldn't marry me.
But we met at a fraternity eventin April of 99.
And we've been together since.
It's one of those.
We called it quad fest, right,you have bands and all those
things out on campus, which wasunusual.

(08:02):
It was the only time of theyear that this happened and I,
honestly, I'd had a crush on hereven though, technically,
hopefully, my ex doesn't hearthis, but I had a crush on Kelly
for a couple of years, evenbefore I met her, and so I took
a shot right, we miss 100% ofthe shots we don't take.
So I took a shot on that Aprilday and, yeah, we we hung out

(08:26):
ever since and, and you know,became great friends.
And now I guess now 25 yearslater since we met but it was,
it was a college thing and andwe immediately hit it off.
A lot of fun.
A lot of fun.
It's hard to believe it's been25 years.
Thanks for reminding me.
There you go.

Speaker 3 (08:44):
I just celebrated 25 years myself, man, so make you
feel just as old.
And then each member of thesquad.

Speaker 2 (08:57):
Yeah, so gosh man, logan's 21.
He goes to school at App State.
Hard to believe he's going tobe a rising senior, right.
So he and I, and he's startingto ask the questions about
business and money and financesand what should he be thinking
about?
So we're starting to go, whichis new for me, right, and I
think all the kids, right, wehave a lot of friends, I think,

(09:21):
all of the kids that have.
Once you get to that upperclass level in college, I think
the professors at school reallystart going hey guys, you got 24
months and you're going to thereal world, right?
So you know that's.
That's been a blast, jacksonbeing the rising senior playing
football, and you know hisrecruiting journey is is really

(09:43):
just beginning.
And his recruiting journey isreally just beginning.
Even though Logan playedfootball, he decided he didn't
want to play in college and hewas a heck of a long snapper and
could have played at D1 levelbeing a long snapper.
But he said, dad, I just wantto go to school.
So I respect that.
It's his choice at that point.
And Jackson wants to play inschool.
So he's got, I guess, eight ornine schools right now that that

(10:06):
like him.
So we're going through thatprocess of visits and and having
the like I said earlier, thewindshield time, right.
But he's a great kid was alwayshe's the jokester of the family
, right, he's the funny guy.
You always need that.
And then my daughter, kinleyMcKinley we call her Kinley.
She is the blessing of thefamily.

(10:29):
You know, never imagined havinga girl, but I'll say this man,
having a daughter has made me abetter father, a better husband.
It has opened my eyes to thingsthat I'd never even thought of.
You know, I do have a youngersister, but she's 15 years
younger than me.
So I was basically out of thehouse by the time she could talk

(10:52):
, so I didn't have that close ofa relationship with her.
You know, growing up as you dowith most siblings.
But you know, I've got a brotherthat's five years younger than
me.
So I just never got thatexperience from that girl side.
And I'll tell you what man.
You know, I've got a brotherthat's five years younger than
me.
So I just I just never got thatexperience from that girl side.
And, uh, I'll tell you what manI am.
It is.
It is a journey.
I'll just leave it at that.

(11:13):
It is a journey, man, I amlearning on the fly so I got a
lot of buddies who are, who aregirl dads, um and uh.
You know, sometimes I get goodadvice.
Sometimes I don't like what Ihear, but it comes with the
territory, I suppose.

Speaker 3 (11:28):
Love it.
I am a girl dad too.
I love having a daughter.
I, I, I've.
Yet I feel like lucky cause Ihaven't had to deal with the
girly girly stuff.
My daughter's boyfriend is thegame of basketball and but she
definitely, you know, shedresses.
Uh, there's been a couple oftimes where I'm like you're

(11:48):
wearing that, what, what?
Where's the rest of the outfit?
Did you get bit by a dog?
Oh gosh, you know.
So, like that type of stuff,but like for the most part, um,
she's just very, very driven, um, and I, I love having a tough,
independent daughter, which isthat that's a lot of my wife
Carrie.
She's a beast and I think mostof us good marriages we marry up

(12:10):
, yeah, absolutely, oh, Idefinitely outkicked my coverage
.

Speaker 2 (12:13):
There's no doubt about it, which is probably why
it took me two years to take theshot, Right?
So, um, and I might've had acouple of couple of cocktails,
uh, before I took that shot.
It gave me a little bit ofcourage, but so far it's worked
out.
So, there we go, very blessedman, love, love the three kids.
They're great kids, good headson their shoulders, very driven
and, like I said, the, the, the,our daughter is like I don't,

(12:36):
like she's insane, Like justworks so daggled I like she does
things at 12.
I have never even, never eventhought about and honestly, even
in high school I did not workthe way if I did.
I might've had a probably muchbetter sports career, but she's
ridiculous man, she's just,she's just so driven and and
committed to when she, when she,commits, she's, she's all in,

(12:57):
so it's fantastic.

Speaker 3 (12:58):
Now is is.
Does Kelly work too, or doesshe stay at home?
She stays at home, okay.

Speaker 2 (13:03):
Now I say that Hardest job on the planet.
No doubt about it.
She wears many hats and,honestly, I would not be able to
be a CEO of one company foundanother.
I would not be able to do that.
Fortunately, she startedhelping me.
If you think about the wholeEOS model and the whole
visionary, traction, visionaryand integrator, right From

(13:23):
traction, I am certainly thevisionary.
I've never seen a bad idea.
I've got new ideas every day.
That's why I love my gym timein the morning because I got a
thousand ideas.
So she's one of my who's, ifyou will that.
Say hey, Clegg, slow down.
So she does help a lot,especially behind the scenes
with the new company, and does alot of back office stuff for us

(13:44):
as well in QWorks group.
So she's not exactly stay athome, but she's partial stay at
home.

Speaker 3 (13:51):
There you go.
All right, man.
Well, I like to go back in timewith my guests and I'd like to
learn about what was life likegrowing up for you and let's
talk.
I'd love to talk about or haveyou talk about, the impact your
dad and parents have on you nowthat you're a dad?

Speaker 2 (14:03):
love to talk about or have you talk about the impact
your dad and parents have on younow that you're a dad?
Yeah, no, I have a much betterrelationship with my father
today than I did growing up.
I even said this in my TED Talk.
My parents were only 20 yearsolder than me, so I mean they
were practically kids when theyhad me and they divorced pretty
early on.
I think I was 12 when theysplit up.

(14:24):
My mom and I were best friends.
Growing up.
Other kids were out playingball and playing.
I'm in watching soap operaswith her during the summer.
She's trying to kick me out togo play, but I just had a great
relationship with my mom.
Later in life, my dad and I arevery close now, but later in
life, my dad and I are veryclose.
Now.
I'm very fortunate to have bothmy parents and I learned a lot

(14:49):
from my dad and my dad has owneda lot of things that he'd
probably do differently if hehad to do it all over again.
So I was very fortunate andblessed to play sports and had a
couple of close coaches.
That coaches right that thatreally played that father figure
for a period of time.

(15:09):
Uh, in in in my life and, um,you know, I I think part of part
of that.
Um, you know, I wouldn't saylike I think most people would.
Naturally we all want more forour kids than we had for
ourselves.
Right, I think that's just anatural human instinct that we

(15:31):
have.
I don't know that I necessarilythought, you know, I don't
think I reflected back on my dadas much you know as a as a
early parent, as much you knowas a as a early parent.
Um, you know, I was veryfortunate and blessed that, uh,

(15:56):
when Kelly graduated, weactually moved.
I got reload um with uh techsystems before K-Force and to to
Houston and that's whereKelly's parents were.
And you know, back in thosedays there was like 10 different
cities that could have gone toand I was like, hey, if we're
going to have kids, let's gomove near your parents.
So we did and I really got achance.
I got very close.
I mean, her dad became mybusiness mentor, one of my best
friends.
He was my golf buddy.

(16:17):
Early Sunday mornings I alwayshad the first tee time, which
was like 6.15 in Houston, whichI can't say I was always on time
for, but I made it, you know.
So her parents had a lot to dowith becoming a father and a
parent and you know I really youknow the whole.

(16:41):
It takes a village.
I've been blessed, I've had avillage.
I've had a lot of very keypeople in my life.
Even going back to like my highschool sweetheart, I mean truly
like her parents.
I spent a ton of time with them.
I think I dated her like six orseven years.
I mean I rode my bicycle to herhouse the first time, right, so
that's how long ago it was.
So I have, I've been, I've beenvery fortunate and blessed to
have a lot of people surroundingme to help.

(17:03):
I didn't get a lot of trouble.
You know I didn't drink, dodrugs, any of that stuff.
You know like a lot of a lot ofkids were doing in high school.
You know I was usually thedesignated driver if there was
ever the party was was happening.
So you know I just I was veryfortunate man I was.
I was fortunate to have a lotof people surrounding me and
then a lot of great coaches thatcared about me.

Speaker 3 (17:25):
So what, as you think about, like the journey of your
pops, though, like um, when youwere young, what were?
What were like um, or your mom,or your dad as you, as you
think back to like the corevalues that were like these are
our house rules, bro, and yougot to follow them.
That that stuck out now thatyou're a father.

Speaker 2 (17:42):
Yeah, I would say with my mom.
My mom played both parts reallytruly.
I did end up moving in with mydad when my mom got remarried.
My stepdad was pretty abusiveso I left my mom, which crushed
her, broke her heart, and I leftmy brother at the time because

(18:05):
my sister was born about a yearafter I left.
So I guess I was right at about15, 16 when I moved in with my
dad.
You know I was a good kid man.
You know I never had a curfew,I never got in trouble.
I mean I just didn't go out.
I mean sports were soeverything for me and I had a

(18:26):
good group of friends right thatI played sports with and you
know there wasn't a lot.
Now I could say watching mybrother grow up was a different
story.
Right, I'm five years olderthan him.
You know I learned aboutboundaries really quickly
because my brother was such alittle badass best I can say but

(18:51):
really it was about standardsand boundaries and honestly
those are probably the twothings that I speak to my
clients about the most and it'sfunny, I've never really
correlated the two fromchildhood.
So I appreciate you bringingthat up.
But I was, I was a really goodkid and my mom always says if my

(19:12):
brother was born first I wouldhave never been born, but I made
up for it in the later years, Isuppose, as my mom would say,
but it was always aboutstandards and boundaries, and I
think a lot of that, once again,not only was, as my mom would
say, but you know it's, it wasalways about standards and
boundaries and I think a lot ofthat, once again, not only was
set by my mom, but really trulya lot of it was set through my
coaches.
Everything, everything in mylife at that time younger was

(19:33):
was about sports.
I mean truly.
I mean sports probably kept mein shape where I was.
I was a pretty good littleathlete and I wanted, I wanted
more in that life and and theonly way to do that was, you
know, to, to, to fly right.
So that was, that was alwaysthe choice and it wasn't wasn't
tough.
I never had a lot of peerpressure.

(19:55):
I wasn't exposed a ton, reallytruly, until maybe my junior
senior year and at that point Iwas already locked in.
So you know that's what breaksmy heart about some of these
kids today, that I mean God, thefentanyl and the drugs and and
just God, the social media.
I mean they're, they're alwayson right.

(20:16):
I mean there's, there's never,there's never a downtime.
So but standards and boundariesman, standards and boundaries.

Speaker 3 (20:26):
If you don't mind, again, if it's too close, we
don't want to talk about it.
I'm curious, I'm super curious,as you know.
Um, talk, take me back to thedecision to move out.

Speaker 2 (20:36):
Yeah, so this, this actually was in my Ted talk.
Um the uh, it was a tacoTuesday and Tuesday and I was
sitting at the dining room tableand I was actually shredding
cheese.
I didn't go into this muchdetail in the talk, but my
stepdad was picking on me, whichwas not unusual, and this day

(20:56):
just went a little too far.
The next thing I remember I'mon my back looking up at him on
top of me you know, beat mepretty good and my mom on top of
him trying to pull him off.
And when I, when I got up, Iwalked out of the house and I'll
never forget, I went and sat onthe back of my mom's car out in
the driveway and of course hecomes out and he's like man, I'm

(21:18):
so sorry, I apologize.
And I, at that point, I I justchecked out, I didn't hear him
and the decision was easy Um,and I I know still to this day
my mom, like even when we dotalk about that, uh, she hates
that that happened, she hatesthat she lost those high school
years, uh, but I mean my, myparents lived basically in the

(21:38):
same town.
So I mean I, I saw my mom often,but you know, it is different
when you're, you're no longerliving where you grew up.
Um, and uh, you know, and itdid, I think.
I think it impacted my brotherand I too, Right, I mean I I
didn't get to be that bigbrother for him when he was in
middle school that he probablyneeded, right, um, I'm fortunate

(21:58):
my brother and I are very close.
You know, we're at leasttexting every day.
That's cool, but you know it'sit is.
And I'll say this you know, mydad and my brother and I are on
a text string together and weare all three of us are texting
every single day and really areclose.

(22:21):
But I just, it wasn't a toughdecision, man, I mean I just I
knew I was like I can't stay.
I've never felt first, I mean,that was the first time I really
ever had my ass kicked likethat.
I got beat up once when I was12 by like four dudes, but it
was more gut shots than faceshots, but it was easy, man, I

(22:43):
mean it really was.
It was like four dudes, but itwas more gut shots than face
shots, but, um, it was easy, man, I mean it really was.
It was like man, this isn't,this isn't where I'm going.
This isn't where my head is,and um, it's just.
Uh, how did your dad take it?
That was, that was um man, Ihadn't thought about that.
Um, he was pretty upset.
Um, about that, he was prettyupset.

(23:10):
I do recall, I believe there wasone minor interaction between
him and my stepdad and, you know, nothing really didn't go too
far.
But I mean, I can't thinkingabout being a father.
I can't imagine another adultputting hands on any of my kids,
like I cannot.
You know, you see some of thosestories on Instagram or on the
news where you know dad's kidwas a victim in some way, shape

(23:34):
or form and, you know, finds theperpetrator in the courthouse,
right, and I could easily seehow those things happen.
You know, my wife and I alwaystalk about this Like I would go
back to college in a heartbeat,like no, don't get me wrong, I
love being a 50 year old, I lovebeing a business owner, I love
being a dad.
I wouldn't change any of that.
If I had to make a choice, Iwould certainly go back to

(23:58):
college.
My wife would go back to highschool.
I want no part of high school.
None like none at all.
And I think a lot of that stemsfrom, you know, being a ninth
grader and or an eighth graderat the time.
I guess, with my stepdad andand all of the things that
happened there, it's just amiserable time.
But once again, I mean I wasblessed, I, I, I was, I was

(24:20):
blessed, I was dating someoneright who ultimately I dated
much longer and whose parentswere around quite a bit.
I mean I think I ate dinner ather house every single night for
better part of three or fouryears.
I mean truly, you know it was,and then ultimately my dad
remarried and my stepmom movedin.

(24:42):
And that's when normalcyprobably set back in my senior
year, I think that my senioryear they got married.
But yeah, it was tough, man.

Speaker 1 (24:53):
I'm not going to lie.
Yeah, I can imagine.

Speaker 2 (24:57):
But that was my life, right, I didn't know any
different.
So I was so invested in sports,honestly, and I hate when I,
when I talk to people and theirkids don't play sports, and I
know, not everything's about aball, I get that, but do
something Right.
Do something that requiressocialization, right, and

(25:22):
dealing with conflict, dealingwith challenges, dealing with
struggle, like that's the stuffthat it's why I love hiring
athletes, right, I mean it takesa lot.
I mean I think about what myson's about to do.
I mean we got two weeks offbefore summer camp starts and
you know he's going to be at theschool at 645 every morning

(25:43):
until almost noon.
You know, four days a week.
You know grinding Right, andthat's hard.
I mean by the time camp, actualcamp gets here in August right,
he's gassed.
Right, he's already got twomonths of of grinding Right.
And and football is a toughsport, as you know, right, being
a quarterback, you especiallyknow.
Toughest guy in the field,that's right, no doubt about it,

(26:05):
brother.
Hey, well, especially if youdon't have a very good offensive
line, you got to be thetoughest guy on the field.

Speaker 3 (26:12):
Real quick, I joked.
So this Jackie Moon, my boyJake, his dad played center at
University of Oregon.
Oh wow, his quarterback wasAkeely Smith, oh geez.
So I talked to him this week wewere joking because he was at
the state high school golftournament and I said you know,
his name is Dekus.
You know, dekus?
Actually I didn't even playfootball, I was quarterback.
Now, tongue in cheek, we playeda little football.
Now, when I took shots back inthe 90s, that would be outlawed

(26:40):
right now and like being anO-lineman, that's football, oh
yeah, I love the trenches.
I want to make sure I give loveto the O-line brotherhood.

Speaker 2 (26:46):
I know my role, that's right.
Amen to that man, amen to that.
But it is man, it's just, youknow, and I can appreciate the
question and I'll be honest, youknow, I had that accident last
year of why I was doing the TEDTalk and I got a chance to
really reflect on a lot of thosethings that I'd forgotten about
and it just hadn't, it didn'thave a reason to think about it,

(27:07):
and so, you know, I really hadto start journaling, I really
had to start reflecting on thepast, and that really was all
because of Dr Benjamin Hardy.
And you know he's got this,he's got this theme, if you will
, about time isn't linear, right?
You know it's not.
You know Newton says time islinear, einstein says it's not,

(27:29):
it's relative right.
And and so most of us, as humans, we, naturally, because we're
taught this way, we, we, thepast impacts the things that we
do in the present.
And instead, what, what?
What Dr Hardy says is he's likeno, no, no, like reframe your
past.
Right, because we can make itwhatever we want it right, which
, like, truly we can.

(27:50):
The outcome, the event,whatever it is, has already
happened.
There's nothing we can do tochange that right.
What we change is the future,and the future is that of the
impact of the things you do inthe present, not the past.
And so, like that to me, itreally struck me and that whole
time concept really was.

(28:11):
I mean, it was like magic to mewhen I started thinking like my
future self and who I wanted tobe.
It changed everything.
But to do that I had to dig deepand journal.
I'm not a journaler, right, Iwasn't, I hadn't been and and
man.
When you start writing, it'scrazy, like writing reflected on

(28:34):
my past, like giving myselfspace, which, as leaders, we
don't give ourselves enoughspace.
We need space to think.
That's the only way we becomethe best version of ourselves in
anything that we do.
And when I started doing thatand these were things before the
accident that I would havejudged as being way too woo-woo

(28:55):
or fluffy for me, right, that'ssoft.
I don't do that.
I don't meditate and I'mtelling you, man, I'm still not
great at meditating, I don't doit every day.
Telling you, man, I'm still notgreat at meditating, I don't do
it every day, but I do write, Ido journal, I do reflect, and
it is frightening the thingswhen I see myself now, and I
know my parents are proud.
They tell me all the time howproud they are of me and I'm
very blessed to have both of myparents still around and healthy

(29:17):
.
And when I do think back tothose times of being a
12-year-old, 13-year-old,14-year-old, I can't imagine my
kids going through what I wentthrough.
But it didn't seem hard at thetime, it just seemed the way it
was supposed to be.
So I don't know why, but inreflection, freaking sucked

(29:41):
Right.

Speaker 3 (29:43):
Well, I love that you shared that.
I know that's not easy to talkabout, um and I and I hope
there's a dad at home listeningthat that will.
I want to get into your Ted talk, but I want to like kind of
build this up so peopleunderstand it, but like, uh, so
many people go through hardshipin life but don't talk about it.
Um, you know, like my dad, restin peace my dad was molested
when he was six years old by hisbrother.

(30:04):
I learned about that and I wasin college and I was like what,
and there's so much.
That came out later when, likedealing with, I saw what my dad
went through.
He had, you know, a rapture tohealth issues that just kind of
got worse and worse because hedidn't.
I don't think he got ahead ofit and then didn't know how to
deal with it.
And so I think, like thingsyou're doing, like writing, um,
journaling, I do gratitude workevery day.

(30:24):
I look at a Bible scriptureevery day.
You know, I don't I'm not likesuper religious, but I'm very
spiritual.
I believe that people's coming,coming to your life at the
right time If you really lookfor it.
Um, like you, I have coachesthat were massive mentors for me
in my life, that spoke to me.
Um, but, and I and I love thefact that the story as much as
you maybe you thought goingthrough you're like this is

(30:44):
going to be the worst ever.
I'm never gonna be my mom, mydad's going to do this, whatever
.
But now you're, you found peaceand you're back with each other
, which I think is an awesomeway to end, end it.
And you know, and you got greatrelationships, which I'm sure
there's a lot of.
I mean maybe real quick, likewhat well, two part question
what skills do you think you useto bring those relationships
back to present?

(31:05):
And the second part of thequestion is how much of the
story does your, do your kidsknow?

Speaker 2 (31:09):
Yeah, um.
So the first part.
I would say my parents had alot to do with that, more so
than me, right, truly, um, as asI got to school and I probably
grew up a little bit too right,but as I got to college my dad
was more present then and Ididn't go away to school until I

(31:30):
was 21.
I thought I was going to be alot better baseball player than
I ended up being.
But he became present truly andwe just developed a friendship.
Truly it is a friendship.
I mean, he's my dad and Irespect him as being my dad and
I know there are things that hewould certainly change in his

(31:53):
life.
But I also reflect back ongoing.
He was 20.
My parents were 20 and 22 andthey had me.
I mean, I'm 33 years older thanmy oldest.
I can't imagine being 20 yearsolder than him.

(32:20):
I can't even fathom what itwould have been like to be a
20-year-old with a child.
So I truly don't.
So I think, from my perspective.
So I want to give him and, onceagain, I was very close to my
mom when I was younger, so Iwant to give them credit.
But from my perspective, Ireally think that, from a skill

(32:46):
set perspective, resilience,right, I never blocked things,
like some people just ignorestuff.
I've never ignored things.
I have always addressed thingshead on and, ironically, until
the accident.
But as a kid and a young adult,I did.

(33:07):
I like conflict, I don't likeconflict, but I've been able to
address it.
I don't like conflict.
I'm not a fan of conflict and Ithink most of us don't like.
If you like conflict, there'sprobably something wrong with
you.
There's probably a smallpercentage of people that do
don't like.
If you like conflict, there'sprobably something wrong with
you.
There's probably a smallpercentage of people that do.
But but you know, I don't shyaway from it and and I have

(33:30):
always been a very open, directperson, and I think some of that
does stem from my upbringingand and I mean, gosh, I was in
high school and, and I meanthere would be Fridays, I'd get
home and my dad said, hey, I'mgoing to the beach for the
weekend and I wouldn't see himtill Sunday night, right, and
I'm I mean, I'm 15 year old kid,um and I always had buddies at

(33:52):
the house, but we never got introuble.
We didn't have big you knowragers or any of that stuff.
My dad trusted me, um, and Itook that trust, I think,
seriously.
You know, we never got anytrouble.
I mean we might have playedbaseball in the house, messed up
a couple of walls or a coupleof lamps and things like that
that we, you know, came up withan outlandish lie of what
happened, blamed a couple ofthings on my dog at the time.

(34:15):
But I think that thatindependence that I had at such
a young age has really given mewhat I have today.
Truthfully, from a kid'sperspective, my kids know, I
believe, the overwhelmingmajority of my childhood.
You know I have a very opendialogue with my kids.

(34:36):
You know they're stillteenagers, right, or two of them
now, I guess, still areteenagers.
But you know, everything's notperfect.
Certainly, we have the sametroubles and struggles that any
other family does, but our kidsdo not.
They're not afraid to talk to usand and we always say and we

(34:59):
had an opportunity to have aconversation just a few weeks
ago as a family and said look,guys, you're going to screw up.
We know that.
You know it doesn't make itright, doesn't give you the
ability to make it, ok.
But when you do, your mom anddad always have your back.
Now you may get in trouble, youmay get punished.
Right, you're going to.
There are consequences to ouractions.
You're going to, there areconsequences to our actions.

(35:21):
But, um, you know we'll dealwith anything head on and uh,
and and it's it's, it's awesometo have that level of
relationship with, with yourkids, and I just know, as as
they get older and becomeparents themselves, we're going
to be great friends with ourkids, which is awesome, love it.

Speaker 3 (35:38):
I can't wait to plan a member guest with my son.
Yeah, oh my God, that's awesome.
Or a member member I didn'teven thought about that, that's
awesome, that type of stuff.
Yeah, I was just in BandonDunes.
Have you heard of Bandon Dunes?
Oh, absolutely.
Oh, I was there last week and Ihad a fantastic time and, um, I
was joking with my buddies, ohyeah, oh, my gosh, it's I mean

(36:01):
people listening that have notgone to Bandon Dunes.
Bandon Dunes could be a sponsorof this podcast.
Go see, go visit Bandon Dunes.
If you're a golfer, it's thebest, that's awesome.

Speaker 2 (36:09):
Yeah, we have a lot of buddies that they go every
year and Bandon's usually partof that trip when they hit the
West coast, and I mean it's,it's always the tops of the trip
when they come back the tops ofthe trip when they come back.
I have not played golf out West, but at some point, yeah, I got
it.
I got it Certainly hit that nodoubt.

Speaker 3 (36:28):
Here we go.
All right, you mentioned theaccident.
People at home are probably onthe edge of their seat, like
what the hell is he talkingabout?
Tell us what happened.

Speaker 2 (36:36):
Yeah, without being too graphic, I was driving back
from a seven on seven tournament.
You know my my last spring, itwas March of 23.
And I was on the interstateoutside the Charlotte area,
about 45 minutes away, and guyjumps off the bridge in front of

(36:56):
my truck and unfortunately ithappened pretty quickly where I
didn't have time to stop or toswerve or avoid, and ran over
him and he did not make it andthat was, I mean, it just was
surreal, doesn't even do itjustice.

(37:18):
I haven't found a word todescribe that moment when you
realize that I just ran over ahuman being.

Speaker 1 (37:29):
You got to understand like if I hit a squirrel right.

Speaker 2 (37:32):
I mean I'm lifting my feet up off the.
You know I'm going holy crap,like I can't believe I just did
that.
My life changed forever in thatmoment.
My life changed forever in thatmoment and months following
that.
Honestly, until my TED Talk, mywife didn't even know.

(37:54):
She did not know really trulywhat I went through.
And it was a good three, fourmonths, most of the summer last
year, even as football wasstarting and I was coaching.
I was in a pretty low place,pretty dark place, and I never
blamed myself.
I wasn't guilty because of whathappened.

(38:16):
There was nothing that I coulddo and those were the messages.
If I hadn't seen anyone for sixmonths since the accident, the
first thing that people wouldsay was like oh my gosh, I'm so
sorry.
You know, I heard a while but Ididn't know how to reach out.
You know, but now that I seeyou it's.
You know it's not your fault,you know I'm sorry.
It happened, could havehappened to anybody.

(38:36):
You know, wrong place, wrongtime, those were kind of the
themes that I would get andthose things are all true,
didn't matter, it didn't changehow I felt and I couldn't really
describe how I felt andobviously you know I had, you
know, got a therapist and didall of that.
But honestly, man, it wasmeeting Dr Benjamin Hardy and

(39:04):
joining his group that reallythings started to change for me,
and it was the whole idea ofreframing your past truly.
And the idea of that reframe isreframe your past not as
something that happened to you,but reframe it that it happened
for you.
So it really is a shift in themindset.

(39:28):
And it wasn't until the TED Talkthat I wasn't going to practice
in front of my wife at all.
It's weird.
I was actually really nervousto do it in front of my wife,
which was really crazy.
Hopefully millions of peoplewill watch it, but one person in
the living room, like I, wasfrightened to tell her, but I
ultimately did because I wasreally struggling.

(39:48):
The last week there were somechanges that were made and it's
very like what's the word I'mlooking for?
Particular right.
So you have TED coaches thatcoach you through the process
and the Sunday before they weremaking changes I was like holy
crap.
So that week prior to I had sixdays to get it right and so I
decided to and my wife cried mywife's not a crier.

(40:12):
We always tease that I'm thechick in the relationship, she's
the dude right, Because I'mvery, very vulnerable, I'm very
open and a pretty sensitiveemotional dude generally
speaking.
And man, she was like shit,clegg.
I had no idea, because I did.
I walked around, I pretendedeverything was okay and I

(40:32):
believed in my mind thateverything was okay, like I
genuinely, if you would haveasked me straight up 12 months
ago, you know, last May of 2023,which is two months after the
accident I'd be like, oh man,it's OK, it's good, like it
happened, nothing I could doabout it.
I mean, that's that?
That was my response toeverything.
Oh man, nothing I could havedone about it.
Like it's awful, I feel forthat person, that family, what

(40:54):
they're going through.
You know, I was playing thatgame and I didn't even know that
I was really playing that game,didn't even know that I was
really playing that game.
I really didn't know that I wasstruggling.
I knew I didn't want to get outof bed in the morning, right, I
knew that I had lost motivationto go to the gym and lost
motivation to to, to, to doanything.
Really it was awful.

(41:16):
Um, yeah, I mean that's a lot,I know.

Speaker 1 (41:21):
But Hello everybody.
My name's Craig Coe and I'm theSenior Vice President of
Relationship Management forBeeline.
For more than 20 years, we'vebeen helping Fortune 1000
companies drive a competitiveadvantage with their external
workforce.
In fact, Beeline's history offirst-to-market innovations has
become today's industrystandards.
I get asked all the time whatdid Casey do for your

(41:44):
organization?
And I say this it's simple.
The guy flat out gets it.
Relationships matter.
His down-to-earth presentation,his real-world experience
applied to every area of ourbusiness.
In fact, his book Win theRelationship and Not the Deal
has become required reading forall new members of the global
relationship management team.

(42:05):
If you'd like to know moreabout me or about Beeline,
please reach out to me onLinkedIn.
And if you don't know CaseyJaycox, go to CaseyJaycoxcom and
learn more about how he canhelp your organization.
Now let's get back to today'sepisode.

Speaker 3 (42:22):
Now let's get back to today's episode how so you do a
TED Talk In a few minutes?
Talk about the why you want todo a TED Talk and then talk
about how that's impacted you asa dad, husband, business owner,
et cetera.

Speaker 2 (42:37):
Yeah, when I and I keep going back to Dr Hardy and
I do that because it washonestly it was he played a big
part in my recovery, in hisprocess and the way he thinks
and the things, it was gospel tome it just it was this magnetic
pull, as I said in the talk.

(42:58):
It was this magnetic pull thatI just I couldn't like the whole
idea of a future self.
Like I got excited again, likeI was motivated.
I was like you know what I mean?
I was working seven days a week, I was grinding and it was not
working.
I can remember several timesthat Kelly would say, clegg,
like you got to take a day off.
And I'm like, no, I reallydon't.
Like I feel awesome, like I wasso alive when I really started

(43:19):
this whole process and I waslike you know what, if this
whole idea of the future selfcan really straighten me up,
like how many like 70 pluspercent of people are going to
experience some level of traumain their life, I'm like maybe
this can help somebody.
So my why was the idea of maybethis can help somebody?
And so I said you know, I saidI want to.

(43:42):
I made a commitment to myself,I said I'm going to be on a TEDx
stage within five years.
And I started journaling andstarted doing all these things.
You know, I'm going to be aprofessional speaker.
I'm going to, I'm going tostart speaking for a living.
And so I started this company,leadership Squared.
And so I hired a speaking coachand, within you know, told him
all my goals and within twoweeks he sends me this thing and

(44:05):
says hey, here's a TED Talk, goapply.
And I was like I said fiveyears, I'm like I'm not flying
to a TED Talk now.
Are you crazy?
I was like I don't even knowwhat the hell I'm doing.
I don't even.
And I did, and you know, madeit through the process and got

(44:25):
the opportunity.
And I even say in the talk, I'mlike, because I was taking the
steps of becoming my future self, things started changing
quickly, like really, truly,like I've done more in six
months, casey, than I've donethe last 10 years, and like this
whole idea of becoming yourfuture self is like it truly is

(44:48):
magical.
And the kids, I think, I thinkwhen they realize you know what
was actually happening and whatthe TED scene is like, what it
is, and you know, they're like,wow man, that's kind of cool.
This is awesome, you know.
And TED has not published ityet.
It actually, you know they'relike wow man, that's kind of

(45:08):
cool.
This is awesome, you know.
And Ted has not published ityet.
It actually hasn't even beensubmitted.
It gets submitted, I think.
I got a note last night.
It's going to get submittedlater this week or early next
week.
So it's probably still a monthaway from actually being on the
Ted site at least, becausethere's a whole process.
I mean Ted is like processoverload, but yeah, I just, I
think they think it's cool andI'm just, I'm, I'm blessed

(45:30):
because my son was drivingbehind me.
He missed that and I called mywife immediately and and I said,
call Jackson, he's, I don't, hecan't see this.

(45:50):
Like, get him to turn around,give, give a crap, get him to
turn around.
And he did.
But I don't know, you know,I've never, I've never really
asked my kids, you know, like,really, truly like, what do they
think?
So I'm going to do that andobviously I'll get some time
with Logan this weekend, sowe'll certainly get a chance to
talk about it, because I'll bewith Dr Hardy, which is awesome,

(46:12):
um, but uh, I don't know, Idon't know what they really
think, other than the.
You know the actual man.
That's pretty cool, dad.

Speaker 3 (46:20):
What about what?
As you went through the processof doing a Ted talk, um, uh,
someone who also I do, I don'tspeak, I would say a ton, but I
speak where I, where it makesmost sense for me in this
journey.
I'm on, Um, you make a greatspeaker, by the way.
I appreciate that.
Uh, when you speak, when, whenyou did what you did to prepare

(46:40):
for the Ted talk, when you wereyou present enough to slow down
to realize that the lessons thatyour kids were seeing about the
preparation and practice youwere going through, no, in fact,
I told you that Sunday theychanged everything.

Speaker 2 (46:51):
I flew out to California for the mastermind
meeting Tuesday, wednesday,thursday and I almost canceled
that trip because I'm like I gotto learn this thing, I got to
memorize this right.
It's not like you've gotteleprompter in front of you,
it's 100% memorization.
I had a few people, and oneperson in particular, chad

(47:14):
Willardson, in California.
He said Clegg, he's like dude,this is great.
And I'm like Chad, I almostdidn't come and I said like I'm
just so stressed, I'm so thisand he goes.
He goes, dude, slow down, hegoes, he goes.
In a few days this will be over.
You know you're going to dogreat.

(47:34):
He's like this is this is meantyou're, this is what you're
supposed to do.
Just remember that.
Remember that he's like.
But stop and look around.
And it wasn't until he saidthat on Wednesday, prior to that
, everything slowed down for me,like I'm not kidding you, it's,
it's insane.
And what a great question bythe way, you are pretty good at

(47:55):
this, by the way but he askedthe question and then you know
it, it just it, it did.
It changed everything, um, forme, and and I mean my heart rate
probably dropped 60 points andyou know when you wake up for
six straight weeks with nerves.
And that's what it was like,like I couldn't wait for it to

(48:16):
be over.

Speaker 3 (48:17):
You had to change underwear probably a few times.

Speaker 2 (48:18):
It's crazy, it's nuts .

Speaker 3 (48:20):
Game day squirts.

Speaker 2 (48:23):
Right Absolutely.
Um, but it Right Absolutely.
But it was amazing.
I was more nervous Friday forthe dress rehearsal than I was
Saturday Once I got the dressrehearsal out of the way,
because I think speaking infront of the other, there were
eight of us.
So speaking in front of theother seven speakers, and some
of those speakers have done likethree or four TEDs.
We're like real, trueprofessional speakers.

(48:45):
I'm this schlup who comes fromstaffing right, what?

Speaker 3 (48:48):
do I know?

Speaker 2 (48:51):
And Saturday was awesome.
It was amazing and I just, Ijust remembered what Chad said.
He's like dude, slow down, likejust take it all in, and so you
know it was about 75 or 80hours of preparation.
Love it, and you know I don'tknow, I think that'll be another
question.
I mean, my kids know, I mean I'ma grinder to begin with, like I

(49:14):
work pretty hard at everythingthat I do because I'm not super
talented in a lot of areas,right, so like I'll try to
outwork somebody.
You know that's probablyanother question to ask them,
but I think just them observinghow much time and energy and the
cool thing for me, man, andunfortunately they couldn't be
there.
You know my daughter had, likethis national event in Atlanta.

(49:37):
So you know, my, my kids were,my, my, my son had.
I forget why my oldest couldn'tbe there, but I brought my best
friend that I've known since Iwas 12, which was awesome.
But them, when I walked in thedoor that Saturday night

(49:58):
unfortunately it was in NorthCarolina so I only had a few
hour drive to get back home itwas pretty, it was pretty
amazing.
Like I know they were proud.
And then the following day,when my, my wife and daughter
and the rest of the clan came in, um, they were just like man,
it was amazing and they were soproud of me and that was just
like and I and I felt good aboutit.

(50:19):
I'm not gonna lie, like when Iwalked off that stage.
Casey, I think I told you thisin prep.
But when I pushed through thosedoors and they're like hey, you
know, you've got.
You've got about a minute toget back to the green room to
give all your you know, your micequipment and all that stuff
back up to the person comingafter the next person.
And when I went through thosedoors, man, I broke down like a,

(50:40):
like a little baby.
I mean, I cried Like I probablyhaven't cried since I was
probably like six, seven, eightyears old and it was like it was
a happy cry, but it wasprobably an ugly cry, I can
imagine.
And unfortunately, nobody wasthere on the other side of that
door, but it was such like mybiggest fear coming out of that

(51:01):
was I'm so fearful that I willnever feel that feeling ever
again.
It was so.
I've never felt that feelingever in my life Child, you know,
kids being born.
Those were pretty amazingmoments and days, but I had
nothing to do.
I had very little to do withthat process.
Right, that was all my life,this was all me, and obviously I

(51:23):
had nothing to do.
I had very little to do withthat process.
Right, that was all my life,this was all me.
And obviously I had a lot ofpeople supporting me.
No doubt about that and withthe preparation.
But it was such an amazingfeeling and a bit of a letdown a
couple of weeks following.
Now I'm three weeks out of it,so I'm coming back to normal,
coming back to life, and now I'mlooking for what's next.

Speaker 3 (51:43):
Well, um, I've, I watched it, as you know, and, uh
, you know, you and I didn'tknow each other.
I'd say, super well, we workedtogether but we'd see each other
on trips and, um, we see eachother from afar and um, but man,
I was like hooked.
I, I loved it.
I thought you killed it andwe'll make sure that any links

(52:04):
you have will be linked in theshow notes so people can see it.
And because it's a great storyand, as you can tell everybody
from the vulnerability and theway Michael articulates the
story and shares the story, it'slike we all have that gift that
we can give ourselves, our kids, our relationships in our life,
that and realize that we're allin this journey of life
together.
We're all flawed, we all gotgaps, we're all replaceable and

(52:29):
I thought you just did afantastic job.
So I'm excited, I'm glad thatyou got some homework out of
this podcast.
That's always a goal when I askquestions to make people think
and because, just as a businessperson, when we ask questions,
that's how we separate ourselves.
Absolutely.
That's so, um, okay.
Other one question I alwayslove asking dads um, as you can

(52:50):
think of your journey as a dad,what's, what's an area of your
dad game that you know has beena gap, um that you are
continuing to focus on, um,getting better at um, tell me I
mean, for me it's patience, butfor you maybe, tell me what
comes to mind.

Speaker 2 (53:05):
Yeah, I would say early on I was a hothead.
I lacked patience, like notomorrow.
Early on with my first kid Iwould say I got better as as
things went.
And now I'm probably toopatient with my daughter, like
truly like.
I'm like, look, if there'sanything that goes wrong my
wife's gonna have to handle it.

(53:25):
But man, that's a greatquestion, cause I think I've
done a much better job as I'vegotten older as well.
From a patient's perspective,my dad joke, my dad joke game is
horrible.
My kids, my kids, call me Mike.
They're like when I tried to befunny guy to them, they're like

(53:46):
okay, mike, that's like, Iguess, my alter ego.
Let me think of this.
That's a really good question,I think.
Well, I don't think I know thisbecause I get this feedback
from my wife.
Sometimes I struggle.
I coach for a living right, soI coach high school football.
I coach executives.
I coach for a living right, soI coach high school football.

(54:07):
I coach executives.
I coach executives runningmultimillion dollar businesses.
So sometimes I might coach alittle too hard or a little too
much at home.
So I've I've been known to havehad a comment or two thrown my
way.
Dad, or Clay, as my wife callsme, or not one of your clients.
So you know, sometimes you justhave to let people be right,

(54:30):
sometimes you just have to letpeople learn, and and you said
something a second ago, and Ithink this is probably why
you've been amazingly successfulin your career and continue to
be is that you know how to askgreat questions.
And I think the same thing asas being a dad and you know it's
asking questions, it's how youget answers Right, and so I

(54:51):
probably talk a little too much,even though I give my kids that
the two one, two ears, onemouth, you know, listen twice as
much as you speak.
I should probably follow thatown advice a little bit, but
having conversations with them,asking more questions, that
certainly would be a gap in mygame, asking more questions than
telling them.
So, god, casey, you give me alot of stuff I got to work on

(55:12):
this week.

Speaker 3 (55:13):
Well, let me make you feel better about yourself.
So, my wife, when I got intothis journey as a coach, I
didn't mean to do it.
This just found me and I was soexcited at first.
I was so excited about thepodcast.
At first I was so I was tellingeverybody sometimes they didn't
give two shits and sometimes Itook it personally.
Well, but I'm excited about it.

(55:33):
And it's like they're nottalking about their job all the
time, whether they're apoliceman, a teacher, a janitor,
a salesperson, and my wife.
One day in the early it's likeprobably year one of the
entrepreneurial journey and shegoes we miss Casey.
Yeah, just be you, don't.
We don't want to be coached.
And I didn't realize I wasdoing it.

(55:54):
Yeah, and talk about like ahumble pie.
That's why might as well stayhumble man.
Life's going to humble you orsomeone's going to humble you,
and that's right.
Be able to take feedback.
And now she wasn't waking up,trying to be a heartless wench
to me.
Yeah, quote ferris bueller'sday off.
She was trying to like man,where'd he go?
Yeah, and I, I'm so.
I'm very thankful to her.

(56:14):
Sometimes I'll bring it up likeman.
I'm so thankful you said that,because I don't want to be that
guy yeah, you know so good on,good on on Kelly, for that is
that is powerful brother, reallytruly is.

Speaker 2 (56:25):
And no, it's, it's true and it is.
And I think that comes fromthat want and the need to you
know, want your kids to dobetter, want your kids to have
more, want your kids to get thethings right, not make the
mistakes.
But in reality they need thatstress, they need that challenge
, they need those mistakes.
That's, that's how they'regoing to be great adults.

Speaker 3 (57:00):
They need those mistakes.
That's how they're going to.
A couple of nuggets of wisdom,two or three things, skills,
topics, thoughts that they cantake from our episode as
actionable steps or to use maybeas progress to be a better
leader of their home, betterversion of themselves.
Tell me what are a couple ofthings that come to mind.

Speaker 2 (57:21):
I would start with standards and boundaries.
Right, create and don't limitthe standards right, have high
standards, have that high floor,expect more of yourself, expect
more of those around you.
Value the time.
Like, honestly, that, goingback to the whole, you know the
the days are long and the yearsare short.
If you're a dad and you've gotyoung kids, it is a grind man.

(57:43):
Oh, I can remember rock paperscissors with Kelly, who's
getting up the next day with thekid.
Enjoy that man.
Those are the moments that,honestly, still this day, I
still remember those 5 o'clockam mornings with Logan.
I mean gosh, we were in Texaswhen it was pretty early in the
morning and I'll never forget Iwas rocking him in the chair and

(58:04):
I think this was 2003.
So I don't even know if he wasa year yet when the Columbia
shuttle exploded over Texas, youknow reentering, and he was in
my arms when that happened.
So you know those, those, thosemoments are special.
You know, as, as as ChadWillardson told me before the
TED talk, you know, slow down,enjoy it, look around.

(58:25):
So I would say that for the,for the dads as well.
And then, ultimately, I think,as as we summarize here just a
few moments ago about askingquestions.
I think it's the most powerfulgift that you know God has given
us as human.
We've got the ability ofconsciousness Right and and
asking questions is how we learnand, um, you know, be very

(58:48):
thoughtful in the questions youask.
You know, tell less, ask more.

Speaker 3 (58:53):
Love it.
You can't see it and no, no oneat home can, but off to my left
, or.
But there's a.
There's a picture of Ted Lassowithout eyes, just a white face
with a mustache.
So imagine the face a nose, butno eyes or no eyebrows.
And it says be curious, notjudgmental.
So I have.
I'm a big visualization person.
I have, like I've done it sinceplaying football in college,

(59:16):
high school, uh, and work, Um, Ihave a vision board.
To my right, I have the podcastgoal board behind my right, I
got, and I just, and when I seeit, it just gets into my
subconscious.
That's right.

Speaker 2 (59:27):
Absolutely Fully believe.
What you focus on expands,brother.
So I love that you do that.
It's fantastic.
And those vision boards, I'mtelling you, man, those things
are fantastic.
I laughed at them for a longtime, me too.

Speaker 3 (59:40):
They are game changers.
Do you remember Angela Aronica?
I do, yeah, Angela's one of myfirst bosses.
She did this.
She had us do a vision board.
I'm like, what is this?
Arts and crafts.
We're in fifth grade.
Oh yeah, you know, typicalsmart-ass guy.
And she's like, just try it.
I'm like, okay, I'll try'sfantastic.

Speaker 2 (59:54):
Always enjoyed seeing her at meetings.

Speaker 3 (01:00:11):
Huge.
She was a huge part of mygrowth in my life.
Um okay, if people want tolearn more about um leadership
score, they want to learn aboutum QQ works.
They want to learn about you.
Tell me what's the best way Ican make sure that we send
people your way so that they canlearn more about you.

Speaker 2 (01:00:22):
Yeah, I would say LinkedIn's the simple and
central area.
Very active on LinkedIn, it isan untapped business tool for
most and even though most peoplesay I'm on LinkedIn, that
doesn't mean you're active onLinkedIn.
It's a tool that could beutilized better and I coach
often about LinkedIn.

(01:00:43):
There's so few people activelyusing it.
I would say LinkedIn would bethe best because otherwise,
given multiple emails, multiplewebsites and that's no fun.

Speaker 3 (01:00:51):
There you go.
We will make sure you're linkedin the, in the, in the show
notes, so everybody can connectwith you.
I can't wait for people towatch the Ted talk Everybody I'm
not I'm not fully you know what.
I watched it, which is why myMr Clegg's here is, because I
was so moved by it and I said Iwant, I want to hear this story
and I want to share it with theworld.
Um, so I'm excited for peopleto connect, watch it.
I hope we get some morefollowers.

(01:01:12):
Uh, it's now time to go into thelightning round where I go
completely random and show youthe negative hits of taking too
many hits in college not bonghits, but football hits.
And my job is to ask youquestions.
Your job is actually to answerthese questions as quickly as
you can.
My job is to ask them rapidfire and make you laugh.
Okay, got it?
Okay, true or false?

(01:01:34):
You hit the sled every morninglike an offensive lineman before
you go to work.
False, okay, true or false?
You, when you coach football,you are the short rightell
shorts with the two buttons toshow off your moose knuckles.
False, false.

Speaker 2 (01:01:51):
I would have worn bike shorts anyways.

Speaker 3 (01:01:53):
I just said the word moose knuckles on the podcast.
First time in five years.
We will make sure there's an Eat the end of this episode, so
it's adult friendly.

Speaker 1 (01:02:02):
Sorry, buddy.

Speaker 3 (01:02:05):
If I was to go into your phone right now, what would
be the one song that I'd beshocked to listen to?

Speaker 2 (01:02:09):
Oh man, my workout is is my workout stations?
Cardi B, nice, let's go, that'sright.

Speaker 3 (01:02:16):
Drop it like it's hot .
That's right If there was to bea.
How about this?
If you were to go on a vacationright now, you and your lovely
bride?

Speaker 2 (01:02:26):
Kelly, where are you going without kids?
Oh man, I want to go to the farEast.
I want to go like Fiji or Bali,something, something over there
.
Absolutely, two weeks Soundsfantastic.
If I was to come to your housefor dinner tomorrow, what will
we have?
Let's see.
I'll be in Austin, but Fridaynight, friday Friday will be to

(01:02:46):
go.
That's either going to beChinese or we'll pick up Chinese
, mexican, never Italian, causemy wife doesn't like Italian,
even though the boys love it.
Give me one of those two.

Speaker 3 (01:02:58):
There we go.
Sounds delicious, If I was to.
If there was to be a bookwritten about your life, tell me
the title.

Speaker 2 (01:03:07):
Oh man, that's a good one.
It would certainly have to haveBe your Future Self in there
somewhere, but Dr Hardy alreadyhas a book like that, so that
might be a bad idea.
I was going to say somethingabout breakdancing, because I
used to breakdance.
You know you want the hook, youwant people to go.
Oh, what's this thing all about?
Why did I say that?
Oh, my God Can you edit thatout.

(01:03:29):
No, no, let's keep that in there.
Hey, let's edit outbreakdancing and moose knuckles.
It would certainly be somethingabout growth, something about
being your future self, becauseI'm telling you that future self
is magic.
Let's go with that?

Speaker 3 (01:03:46):
how about that future self magic?
Okay, now, future self is magic.
Believe it or not, is exploding.
Every bookshelf, no one cankeep the copies in the shelf,
the airports are sold,everybody's sold out.
And now hollywood has found outabout this book, this story,
and hulu has found out about it,netflix has found out about it,
and now you are the casting.
I need to know who's going tostar you in this critically
acclaimed, hit new movie, mrClegg.

Speaker 2 (01:04:07):
My wife would kill me if I didn't say this.
I had one guy in my first jobwho said I look like Gary Busey.
There we go and freaking.
Oh my God, gary Busey is aboutas ugly of a man as you could
possibly get.
So I hate that.
So those of us that can't seeus, I don't think I'm that ugly.
I'm not the most handsome guy,but I have to.
I have to make it Gary Busey.

Speaker 3 (01:04:29):
There you go.
And then last question Tell metwo words that describe Kelly.

Speaker 2 (01:04:34):
Resilient and forgiving.

Speaker 3 (01:04:37):
Bingo, bingo, bongo, lighting round's over.
We both giggle.
We'll call a tie because of myimmaturity A 48-year-old man who
said drop the word mooseknuckles on the podcast.
I'd like to thank you, brother,for telling your story.
It was powerful.
I'm grateful our paths crossed.
I'm grateful they recrossed.

(01:04:57):
I'm excited for what the futureholds for you.
I don't need to tell you but,man, you're, you're, you're
surrounded by some great peopleand, um, it's really, really
cool to see you taking all yourexperience and giving it away
and impacting so many, so manylives, and I know your Ted talk
is going to do that for a lot.
A lot of people do so.
I appreciate it, brother, andthanks so much for sharing your
story.

Speaker 2 (01:05:17):
Thank you, man, thanks for having me, I
appreciate you.