Quincy Bazen: Comedy and His Journey to Authenticity

Welcome to a hilarious behind the scenes chat with Quincy Bazen, the multi-talented stand up comedian and co-host of the Dom Pop podcast. Take a peak into his world growing up a Navy brat, to co-creating a hit podcast, and making the daring move of relocating to sunny Los Angeles. There's never a dull moment as Quincy humorously shares his experiences, whether it's about his desire to pretentiously add accents to his name or his personal journey with ADHD.

This episode takes a deeper dive into Quincy's love for the performing arts and his knack for balancing multiple careers. You'll hear about his personal growth through his acting career, his passion for writing and directing, and his web series 'Rest in Pieces'. But that's not all, Quincy also opens up about his liberating journey of coming out, the struggles, and the joys of embracing his queer identity. Our conversation is sure to keep you gripped as we navigate the challenging terrain of authenticity, social expectations, and the journey to self-confidence.

We also delve into the realities of living a public life, dealing with people’s perceptions, and the relentless pursuit of self-acceptance. Quincy and I share our experiences, the highs and lows of performing in front of vast audiences, and the strains of managing an online presence. We also discuss how therapy, and plastic surgery played roles in  boosting his confidence. Expect a heartening chat full of laughs, insights, and a whole lot of inspiration.

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Episode Transcript

Coach Alex Ray (00:00):
Hello, hello, my unicorns, welcome back to
another special guest episode ofthe Queer Confidence podcast.
I am so excited today tointroduce you to comedian
co-host of the Dom Pop podcastand my hair idol, Quincy ae.

Quincy Bazen (00:19):
Hello, wait, I love that you pronounced my last
name correctly.
I'm already feel like I'm athome here.

Coach Alex Ray (00:25):
I'm so glad you know.
Usually I check that before wehit record and I forgot to you
didn't need to.

Quincy Bazen (00:31):
You were so strong and right.
You were like I love it.

Coach Alex Ray (00:36):
Excellent, thank you.
In my head I hesitated therefor a moment.
It was like oh fuck, just gofor it.

Quincy Bazen (00:42):
We can re-record if we need to.
No, you had to nail that,nailed it.
All of my teachers in highschool shaking.

Coach Alex Ray (00:49):
Why?
How do they usually?

Quincy Bazen (00:50):
Your last name seems sort of easy to pronounce
to me, I think so it's likethere's an E which makes you
assume that you should thinkit's a hard A noise.
But now people go Bazen all thetime Bazen.
I get mailed still to this day.
That says brazen.
I'm like we're just throwing inextra letters.
Now you should just teach aseminar and then we'll be good

(01:11):
to go.

Coach Alex Ray (01:12):
I mean brazen.
What an iconic name to have.

Quincy Bazen (01:15):
I thought about changing my name before I
started pursuing my career.
I thought about just adding anasterisk over the A, not an
asterisk, but like an accent.
Thank you.
Oh my God, an accent over the A, just so people knew exactly
where to hit it with.
All my friends told me itlooked too pretentious, so I
didn't do that.

Coach Alex Ray (01:35):
I mean pretentious might not even be
bad in this industry anyway.

Quincy Bazen (01:40):
Let's just say everyone has to be a little bit
pretentious to make it right.
So when I, if I don't make it,I'm going to believe my friends
for not letting me put theaccents on my A.

Coach Alex Ray (01:50):
Well, at least you have someone else to blame,
so that you don't have to blameyourself Ever.

Quincy Bazen (01:54):
Okay, I'm not going to take responsibility for
my actions.

Coach Alex Ray (02:00):
The perfect introduction to a podcast on
confidence.
Oh my God, okay, no, for real,though, give a, give everyone a
little.
Introduce that introductionIntra.
Ooh, that sounds sturdy.
Okay, introduction to yourself.
Who are you?
What do you do?

Quincy Bazen (02:19):
I put me on the spot.
I'm not used to being thecenter of attention, that's not
true.
Okay, my name is Quincy Bayeson.
Like you nailed, I am acomedian living in Los Angeles,
california, but I still feel newto LA.
I just moved here, like we weretalking about before we
reported.
I just moved here after thepandemic in 2021.

(02:41):
Before that, I was in San Diegofor a couple of years.
I think San Diego was like mytoe step into moving to
California, because I just movedacross the country without a
job, without anything.
I just wanted to be.
You know where the lights andbeaches are.
But my best friend, who I movedwith, hates LA, the lack of
change, so I couldn't convinceher to move with me.
So we did San Diego and I lovedthat.

(03:04):
But before that I was actuallya tour manager for the world's
largest student home festival,which feels like another
lifetime now, but I was thedirector of that festival for a
couple of years and before thatI was a Navy brat.
I moved a.
Can I curse?
Do we curse?

Coach Alex Ray (03:21):
Oh, absolutely, we like to say the fuck word
here.

Quincy Bazen (03:24):
It was really great because I was going to say
I moved what historians havecalled a fuck ton of times
before I graduated high school.
I think it was like 14 or 15times before I graduated high
school and then through aloophole and did up in Florida
because of in state tuition andis that a bio?
I don't know.
I need to work on my elevatorpit for myself.

(03:44):
I guess I think that works.
I'm a child of the world iswhat I'm trying to say.
I'm in Europe mostly, and thenyeah, oh my God, that was awful.
I need a button.
I need like a hook.
I have no hook or button.
I love that I told her foruniverse too.
Like sorry for those of youtrying to keep track, I was just

(04:05):
bouncing all around.

Coach Alex Ray (04:07):
I'm ADHD.

Quincy Bazen (04:07):
Everyone listening knows that Okay, great, and I
didn't take my Adderall thismorning.

Coach Alex Ray (04:15):
Y'all welcome to the most chaotic episode ever.
Here we go.

Quincy Bazen (04:21):
Anyone who listened to my podcast also
expects nothing but chaos.
So, absolutely, you're fromDump Hop, you're right at home.

Coach Alex Ray (04:29):
Yeah, okay, tell everyone a little bit about
your show.

Quincy Bazen (04:31):
Oh, dump Hop, Product of the pandemic.
So many podcasts are my bestfriend and I are.
Entire text thread for the pastdecade has just been us talking
about the pop girls and youknow what the these rollouts or
like what our favorite rolloutsare, how the singles are
stacking up and it's just allthis like stupid gay
conversation.

(04:51):
You know that there that welove to have and I was like I
bet there are people who areinterested in having these
baggie conversations with us.

Coach Alex Ray (04:58):
And I don't know not many gays are into pop
music.

Quincy Bazen (05:01):
No, it's pretty niche, I'm learning, but we
started it in 2021 and we're so.
We're in our third season nowand every week we just tackle an
album.
We go track by track, which isreally fun.
We get to talk, not only likethe big hits every you know but
like the deep cuts, and we getto do like, I mean just
everybody, we just did ourhundredth episode a few months

(05:25):
ago.
Congratulations, thank you,it's so, it's I don't know.
It's fun, it's nice.
So, like a force during thepandemic, it was nice to just
like keep in touch with mybestie, but now it's I mean,
it's work, as I'm sure you know.
Like it's, it's work.
Yeah, I'm top of that, but it'sa.
It's a project that was really,really passionate about, and
now we started interviewingother artists, which is super

(05:45):
exciting and kind of adding newelements to it.
The best part about it that wasevery year we do our own awards
show, because we don't careabout the Grammys, but the
nominees dot, dot, dot is whereit's at, okay, that's where the
real winners are awarded, okay,but I love it's just, it's just
a fantasy.
We just live in our own littlefantasy world and we Kiki and

(06:09):
for whatever reason people seemto like to listen to it, so it
all works out.

Coach Alex Ray (06:14):
Yeah, I really like I listened to part of a
couple episodes because I wantedto like get like learn a little
bit about you before having youon the show and I love the like
BDSM Dominic tricks vibe thatyou all have with this show.

Quincy Bazen (06:29):
Well see, because the T is in my, my pre not pre
performing because I performedon my life, but pre like
pursuing performing full time.
I was a marketing gay, like somany other days are, and so I'm
big on the branding and I loveto brand.
I love to put my Canva promembership straight to work.

Coach Alex Ray (06:49):
So I think all of that came from.

Quincy Bazen (06:51):
I think the like all of the dominatrix stuff came
from.
We were just like shooting thisshit up.
We were going to call thepodcast when we were developing.
It was called pop goes poof,but then again, like I just
didn't, I couldn't see it.
I couldn't, really couldn't seethe structure or whatever.
And then my friends who I thinkwas single at the time,
something someone messaged himabout he was they were looking

(07:13):
for a Dom Top and I was likethat's it.
Like that's it, it's Dom Popand it's just this BDSM gay
music fantasy.
Yeah, the rest is her story.
There you go.

Coach Alex Ray (07:28):
Quite frankly, the whip sound effects do it for
me.

Quincy Bazen (07:32):
Yeah, like in the demo of the pilot.
Demo of the pilot.
See, I can be pretentious, Idon't need the accent I was
trying to incorporate, likehandcuff noises and like
shackling, and I'm like, no,it's too much.
Like you got to buy it, likeit's too much.
But yes, love a good web.

Coach Alex Ray (07:51):
Absolutely.
I don't do any sound effects onthis podcast yet, but you know
if, if and when I do, that'sabsolutely at the top three
sound effects.
I never.

Quincy Bazen (08:04):
I did an interview a couple of weeks ago on one of
my friends podcasts and shebasically records live with like
a sound board and iPad, soanytime either one of us wanted
to play a sound effect, we justpress the corresponding button
and there was like a shaderattle or there was like I might
wait, you might have crackedthis code, because that's way
less work.
Also then, like the seven hoursand editing I'm doing every

(08:24):
week.

Coach Alex Ray (08:25):
Right.

Quincy Bazen (08:26):
I don't know.
I might have to look into that.

Coach Alex Ray (08:28):
That's a great idea.
Send me that info when you getit.

Quincy Bazen (08:32):
I want the like instant sound board.

Coach Alex Ray (08:36):
I don't like listening back to it later and
editing.
I make notes as I go.

Quincy Bazen (08:41):
If there's any parts that I need to like, clip
you know, as I'm rambling,you're like, okay, we're cutting
, whatever the fuck you sayright now, right.

Coach Alex Ray (08:50):
I've lost interest.
I'm looking out the window.
I have no idea what we'retalking about anymore.
Right, yeah.

Quincy Bazen (08:57):
I feel like I enjoy it better when, like
because, like I mean, like we'vedone so many episodes now, like
sometimes we're not alwaysdoing like an album that we're
obsessed with, which I think ispart of the reason we wanted to
like interject interviews now is, like I don't ever want it to
become a chore.
I wanted like it's work, butit's it's work that I'm
passionate about.
I can't we're just like talkingabout an album because we have

(09:17):
to put out an episode, thenneither of us are enthusiastic
and then those are the episodesthat I find that I'm not really
having fun editing.
Because, like, I'm not funediting I used to be a video
editor for a long time Like Ithink it's good for my ADHD to
like it's very detail orientedand like it's a good task.
But again, like, if the contentisn't interesting to me as the
producer, then like I don'treally feel like it's going to
be that interesting to theconsumers either.

(09:38):
You know.

Coach Alex Ray (09:40):
Yeah, 100%, 100% .
You're in the right industry,absolutely All right, tell us a
little bit more.
I want to hear more about yourjourney becoming a comedian
Becoming a comedian.
Yeah, like how the fuck did youget here?
Have you always known that youwanted to get into comedy?
Is this like a new or?

(10:01):
Thing?

Quincy Bazen (10:02):
No, it's definitely.
It's a newer thing.
I hate to keep talking aboutthe pandemic, but it really was
a form of a time In a wakeeningRight.
Well, I mean, I think for somany people, it gave us an
opportunity to really sit withthe lives that we've made.
You know, physically, obviously, like I'm in this space, who
are the people that I'vesurrounded myself with?
Where am I at with my life?
You know, I was fortunateenough that I didn't lose my job

(10:23):
.
I was already working remotelyfor that film festival prior to
the pandemic.
So, for the record, I wasworking remote before.
It was cool.

Coach Alex Ray (10:32):
Same thing here for like shining our credentials
.

Quincy Bazen (10:36):
You know what it is.
I mean we'll get into thislater and like the confidence
portion, but I just like Ireally struggle with authority
and I really struggle withanyone telling me what to do
ever.
So the freedom of workingremote was a beacon for me from
the onset, I think, of myprofessional life.
But I mean, I've always been aperformer.
I've been an actor since I wasseven, six.

(10:59):
My mom loves to tell the storyabout me disappearing in the
McDonald's playground and thenwhen she found me 10 minutes
later, I was yelling action andI had recreated like a retelling
of the Titanic with all ofthese children I had just met.
Oh my God, because on top ofbeing a performer my entire life
, I've been a control freaksince I came out of the loom.
But you know, I grew up onmilitary bases.

(11:21):
I moved pretty much everysingle year.
So like I would, you know,finish my grade and then we'd
move during the summer, do agrade and during the summer, and
so all I had as a constant wastheater and I would just seek
out theater.
And you know, theater freaksare easy to bond with because
you know, we're all, we're all abit of an outcast and you know,
as the perpetual new kid on theblock, it was easier for me to

(11:41):
kind of like just sink my teethinto that and chart away forward
.
So I majored in theater, butnowhere we're majoring in
theater mattered.
I was in Tampa, florida, and Igot involved with this film
festival and then it hit me Iwas like, well, I don't really
need a degree in theater, I wantto pursue acting, or you can
just pursue acting.
So I just changed my major tomass com and then got involved

(12:04):
with the film festival, theother yada, yada, yada.
And then was actually pursuingwriting and directing.
For a while and right before thepandemic I was working on a web
series called rest, in piecesKind of autobiographical, but
only in the sense that like thecharacters had, like my
character had my own name and itwas just like this kind of

(12:26):
cartoon version of myself and meand my two best friends were
the other characters and I wroteand directed it and it was
actually meant to be a six partlike full length, 30 minute
sitcom fantasy, incredible.
We kind of, because one of myfriends lived in Denver at the
time.
Our shooting schedule was kindof staggered, and so by the time
the pandemic hit, we only hadone episode shot in full and it

(12:47):
was the third episode.
So I ended up.
I was just like so itching tolike do something.
I was like, well, okay, well,scrap everything else and I'll
just put this episode out as itsown web series.
So I chopped it up into threebits and I promoted it over 2020
.
And then I was just kind oftwiddling my sums in 2021
started the podcast and I wasokay, that's great.

(13:08):
But then after four months I waslike I need more, like I'm not
fulfilled.
I wasn't doing any theater,wasn't doing any acting, but I
didn't have the tools or thecommunity anymore to be doing
full like web series episodes.
I'm like what can I do 100% ofthe time with my own time?
Like what can I devote as mucheffort as I want to and see that

(13:29):
progress?
And I ended up turning to standup because I was like, well, I
can tell these stories and I cando the performing thing and I
can do the writing thing, and Idon't need to like fly my friend
in from Denver, I don't need tofly my cinematographer down
from San Francisco, I don't needto get five people together for
three days at a time which isway harder than it sounds, also
when you have no money, and soit just became.

(13:52):
It became, I guess.
I guess it was born out ofnecessity, but now, you know,
I'm in the process of writinglike two different one man shows
and I think that that'ssomething I'm finding about my.
My voice as a comedian to islike I think for a while I was,
I was stuck in this mind.
Instead of okay, stand up, islike you go up and you're like,

(14:14):
well, here's this and here'sthis joke, blah, blah, blah.
But that was never my writingstyle and it's never been my
performing style either.
So I think, specifically thelast year or so, trying to weave
in my own identity, into my mymaterial has been really fun,
and I think, if you come see oneof my shows, I'm very
conversational.
I'm just like he came with mygirls and I'm an open book, so I

(14:34):
talk about all kinds of stufffrom, like mental health to my
sex life and things like that.
So I think that I don't know.
It's a.
It's a very much an ongoingjourney and it's very much
something I'm still learningabout.
I'm putting up my first hourthis fall with plans not going
to do another one next spring,because I just want to like kind

(14:56):
of throw everything I've got atthe wall and then see what can
happen to know, because I just,I just can't I just want to wait
around.
I'm too impatient.
Also is another thing to knowabout me.
I'm the most impatient person Iknow.
I mean even just like the lastyear that it's taken to kind of
like work on the material andget to it like I would be doing
it every fucking day if I couldand didn't need to like pay

(15:16):
bills and, you know, do regularbullshit stuff.

Coach Alex Ray (15:23):
Yes, totally.

Quincy Bazen (15:23):
Super long answer.
I hope it made sense.
I hope we tracked it fromabsolutely did.

Coach Alex Ray (15:28):
Yeah, I think one of the you do.
You have another job thatsupports you to while you do all
this.

Quincy Bazen (15:35):
Yeah, I still do copyrighting.
So I do like copyrighting likea medical marijuana company.
Great, Any like fun cutesylittle weed strain you're
reading about.
I could have wrote it.
I could have wrote it probablydid.

Coach Alex Ray (15:49):
There's a lot of accents on all the a's you know
.

Quincy Bazen (15:51):
You know, that's my calling card.

Coach Alex Ray (15:56):
I think it's important for for people to hear
that too, because I know I,being around the world of like a
lot of entrepreneurs for thelast oh God how many years seven
years really got this imagethat, oh, you just sort of like
quit everything, you go in andthen you're just successful and

(16:18):
then that is not how the worldworks.
That's not how it works.
And I love hearing other peoplethat are willing to be like oh
no, like this is my dream, thisis my passion, this is what I my
main thing, but like I alsohave like a fucking full time
job that supports all this shit.

Quincy Bazen (16:33):
You know, when I first moved to LA and people
were asking me like what I did,I would tell them that I was a
copywriter, which, like I lookback on, like why did I ever
tell anybody that like that'slike where I get 90% of my
income and like that's how, likeit's what I have to do to like
support myself and support it'slike my family, but I, I mean

(16:54):
that's not who I am, that's whatI have to do to support what I
am, which is like a performerand actor, comedian.
That you're absolutely right.
Like nobody talks about thehustle, as much as I hate that,
the grind, quote unquote butit's very real and very
prevalent in my life and I thinkmost other performers lives.

Coach Alex Ray (17:13):
Yeah, also like golden tip number one of the day
.
If you are pursuing a like newcareer, if you're pursuing a new
future, whatever it is, stopidentifying yourself with the
old version.

Quincy Bazen (17:29):
I saw some.

Coach Alex Ray (17:30):
God.

Quincy Bazen (17:31):
Sorry, I'm gonna interrupt you.
I saw some tweet like I actuallythink it was before the
pandemic.
I wish I could attribute thequote, but it was basically like
if you're, if you're, stopcalling yourself like an
aspiring filmmaker or a fire,like if you're making anything,
like you're doing it, likethat's what you are.
Like adding the aspiring infront of it is already
minimizing what you're doing andit just puts out that energy

(17:54):
that you don't view yourself ason par with all these other
people in the industry.
Like it's a, it's a mentalityof yourself, it's a mentality
for others, because Lord knowshow the other half of the work
is networking and getting otherpeople to believe in you.
So that's something that Iforgot about, I think, for a
long time, but from the pastyear I've been trying to just

(18:14):
own it, you know, just fake itto you may get yeah, or it's not
even really faking it at thatpoint though.
Yeah, also true.
See, there we go again.
See like I'm still still.
It still feels like faking,everything feels like faking,
even when you're making.

Coach Alex Ray (18:29):
Yeah, even orgasm sometimes.

Quincy Bazen (18:32):
No, don't fake orgasm, not in my experience.

Coach Alex Ray (18:37):
I have before faked orgasms, but it was just
like I was so miserable and thisis like a few years ago, like
hooking up, and I was like Ijust want to get out of here.
I'm like, oh, wow, that wasgreat.
Okay, thank you, bye.

Quincy Bazen (18:51):
Well, but you see the problem with men faking
orgasms or those of us withpenises faking orgasms.
Is there really has to beevidence of such an orgasm and
I'm like well, I'm not here tolike give you, exhibit a like,
I'm just going to have to figureout a way to come and then get
the fuck out of here.

Coach Alex Ray (19:09):
I would pretend when I was topping and I'd be
like oh god, it's in there, okay, bye.
And then like yeah, I get toleave before they find out that
they had no deposit.

Quincy Bazen (19:19):
Oh yeah.

Coach Alex Ray (19:25):
Anyway, we don't fake anymore.

Quincy Bazen (19:27):
No, no, no, no.
I don't think I've ever fakedan orgasm.
Actually, I just wouldgenuinely like okay, I'm good, I
don't think it's going tohappen to me.

Coach Alex Ray (19:39):
Honestly, I love that.
See, we were talking also y'allbefore starting, about how
we've learned that honesty is,oh my god, so important in
relationships, but we'll getthat to that later.
I want to hear more about yourcoming out journey, because you
told me that you, you know yougrew up in the military, moving

(20:02):
around everywhere and then cameto the states and college.
Like, when did you come out andwhat was that like for you?
I've never interviewed anyoneon the podcast.
It's had to come out in like amilitary family setting.

Quincy Bazen (20:14):
Well, this is actually what my show is about.
My show is called don't ask,don't tell, and it's all about.
I mean just just that.
It's about my journey growingup, you know, in a conservative
Christian military home abroad.
You know I was in high school.
I went to high school inBahrain, which is a country off
the coast of Saudi Arabia.
So very pick my words carefullyit's.

(20:41):
I wouldn't say that it's themost liberal place you could go,
certainly not the most forwardthinking.
So I think for me it was likewhatever the opposite of
exposure therapy is like.
I didn't meet a gay person untilI was in college back in the
States and it was very much likeI was just thrown into the deep

(21:01):
end.
I mean maybe not the deep end,because I still went to college
in Florida in 2011, but it waslike a very crazy awakening to
me.
I remember I came out to mybest friends summer after I
graduated high school.
I told her that I was bisexual.
Because I believed that I wasbisexual, I thought that I would

(21:24):
maybe hook up with some dudelike fiddle at each other a
little, and then it'd be out ofmy system and I was going to
marry a woman and maybe we justwouldn't have a super exciting
sex life.
But that was the life ahead ofme and then, over the course of
my freshman year for no reasonin particular, I guess, just

(21:45):
like getting older anddeveloping more critical
thinking I came to theconclusion that I was not
bisexual and I was just gay, andthat in itself was very much
okay, obviously.
But I think it's interesting totalk about these things now,
because this was over a decadeago.

(22:05):
Like the thought of being inthe closet or the thought of not
embracing my queer identity.
It makes me laugh.
Like I feel like I'm chucklingnow because it just seems so far
removed from who I am.
Like I'm just a queer littlebitch.
Like I love being gay, I lovebeing queer.

(22:27):
Because I think what's soexciting about being queer is
like coming out is just thefirst barrier.
Like it's this first fuck youto society.
That like I don't play by theserules that you've set up for me
, I don't have to live withinthese four walls that you've
built around me and you and theworld.
And once you've broken throughthat barrier, like every other

(22:51):
barrier just seems really weakand feeble.
And then you realize that youcan have so much more freedom in
your life.
You can dress however you want,you can express yourself in any
way that you want, you can hangout with people that are really
really fun and interesting andqueerer than you are, and that's
exciting and these people aregonna bring out more of your
identity.
And you know, obviously I livein LA so it's not that hard to

(23:13):
like find these communities here.
But the little bits that I wasgetting in Florida at the time
was really really exciting.
In it it almost like in the sameway that like when you're like
kissing a boy for the first time, like it feels.
It feels I don't wanna saywrong because obviously I don't
know but there's like this itchin the back of your mind like oh
, like what is this?
This is strange and it's new tome, but I think I like it and I

(23:37):
think I wanna explore this more.
I think that that's what a lotof my college years were and
even beyond that, I think thatthat's what my twenties were.
My twenties were coming to notterms, but coming to the light
and the joy of just like livingas a free, queer person.
Love that.

Coach Alex Ray (23:55):
Yeah.

Quincy Bazen (23:56):
There was another long answer for you, sorry have
it alert.

Coach Alex Ray (23:59):
I know why you're apologizing.
This is your guest interview.
You get to talk a lot.

Quincy Bazen (24:03):
No, I just ran, I just talked.
I literally just went to visitmy mom like two weeks ago and
she just kept talking, andtalking, and talking.
And I'm like girl, why are youstill talking?
And I'm like oh God, oh God.

Coach Alex Ray (24:17):
It's really and that's where you get it from,
Literally, and I was like my.

Quincy Bazen (24:21):
My boyfriend and I we went to Italy to cause he's
from England, so his mom and mymom was in Italy, and so his mom
flew down to Italy to meet usfor the weekend and his mom my
mom was just talking her ear offand his mom was a very good
listener and I was like oh, look, it's us.
There's the talker and there'sthe listener.
What?

Coach Alex Ray (24:42):
I love it, and, and now people are going to pay
to just let you talk at them foran hour, right?

Quincy Bazen (24:47):
Exactly, exactly.
That's really where I'm happy.
It's just with a microphone onstage.
I always say that I could havedone drag if I wasn't as lazy as
I am.
Yeah, I just don't have theenergy and the stamina that they
do to put all that extra workinto it.
But I'm happy to throw a coupleknock knocks at ya, you know,
keep you entertained while Ijust keep rambling.

Coach Alex Ray (25:09):
Yeah, oh yeah there.
I've done drag a couple oftimes and I was like this is so
uncomfortable, it's so mucheffort ahead of time.
I was like I bet.
No, I can't.
No, I've got so much respectfor drag.
Let's see.
Was there anything else Iwanted to ask you about that?

(25:30):
I mean, I was thinking likewhat was it like?
How'd your family react to youcoming out and is there?
Any that you wanna share thinkwould be useful for people to
learn from.

Quincy Bazen (25:40):
A useful I don't know, let's see.
So I came out to.
I came out to my sister first.
My sister's one of my bestfriends in the world.
Still.
I came out to her first.
She was great and lovely.
And then I came out to my mom.
So I came out like over thecourse of 2013,.
I came out and I came out to mysister at the top of the year

(26:02):
it was like January 1st or 2ndor something, because I was home
for the holidays and then Icame out to my mom that summer
and she was great.
She cried, said she knew, and Iwas like okay, but my favorite
part of that story is the wholeweek I've been trying to buy
this like $300 blazer, but Icouldn't bring myself to spend
$300, which I mean when you're19,.

Coach Alex Ray (26:20):
It's like rent it's like a thousand dollars,
but anyway.

Quincy Bazen (26:27):
So I had come out to her, we had this really like
intense crime moment, and shewas flying back to Germany later
that night, and so she came upto me again, again and I like
hugged me and she's like I wantyou to go get that place, and
then she handed me $300.
And I was like I didn't end upgetting the blazer, but I was
suddenly $300 richer and I waslike, okay, coming out pays okay

(26:49):
.
Coming out pays is what Ilearned.

Coach Alex Ray (26:53):
And then I've never heard that lesson before
and I like it.

Quincy Bazen (26:56):
Yeah well, you're learning more and more every
time you hear a new story.
right, it's all about the newperspective, Mine is all about
financial gain, which isactually why I didn't come out
to my dad for so long well, likeanother six months because I
was worried that because theywere like supporting me while I
was in college and like payingmy tuition, my rent, and I was
worried that they would not dothat any longer, should he learn

(27:17):
the truth about what I'm up toon that campus.
But this is a very, actuallydramatic story I'll spare you
the details of, but we had afamily meeting.
I don't know if you were afamily meeting kind of home, but
we were- we did sometimes havesome family meetings.

Coach Alex Ray (27:31):
It was always bad, Always bad of course, yeah,
always bad.

Quincy Bazen (27:36):
And my dad is, my dad's a military man.
He's very, very type A and youknow, I don't even I don't think
the details were even about me,like it was about my brother.
My brother was doing somethingand it just put my dad in a
pissy mood, and then he wantedus to have this family meeting
and I don't know about yourexperience, but whenever I felt

(27:57):
like I was gonna come out, itwas literally like Katie and me
girls like the word vomit, but Icould just feel it coming.
My whole body would tense.
And when I came out to mysister, I just started sobbing
because it felt like it was outof my hands, like I wasn't in
the driver's seat anymore.
I just knew this was the momentI was gonna come out and that
whole meeting I just had thisknot in my stomach.

(28:17):
I'm like this is it, like thisis what's gonna happen.
And there was just this massive, dramatic, screaming match like
between me and my brother andmy dad so dramatic, just so
extra.
And the fall there was no likefallout per se in the way that I
was worried about their being,but it became.

(28:38):
I mean, that was 2013.
And I think that it wasn'tuntil 2018 that my dad finally
was able to say that he was like.
He was able to say that I hadconvinced him that being gay
wasn't a choice.
So it was like this veryprolonged six year journey for
him, more so than anybody else.

(29:02):
And I think for a while Istruggled with the idea of like
having to take on this role of ateacher because and I feel this
way about a lot of things toolike queer people go through so
much Like I don't.
Sometimes I struggle with theidea to think that it's fair
that we also have to, on top ofall of what society has put onto
us and put us through.

(29:22):
We've got to sit there andwe've got to be the bigger
person and we've got to bepatient and we've got to teach
bigots how to be better people.
And I struggled with that for along time.
I was very ready to just likewipe my hands.
I mean like well, if you don'tget it, you don't get it, fuck
off.
But that's not, obviously, asuper successful communication

(29:44):
tactic.
So I didn't do that.
And you know, my dad's notperfect by any means, but he
loves me, he loves my boyfriend,he loves to see me happy and
that's what I try to focus on.

Coach Alex Ray (29:59):
So Wow, Do you have anything that you could
share that for anyone goingthrough something similar like
what helped you have thepatience during that time?

Quincy Bazen (30:16):
You know, I think I don't know how applicable this
is across the board, but for me, I always thought of my father
as a very, very intelligentperson and I think I got a lot
of my intelligence from him andso a lot of my drive and a lot
of my type A organizationalquirks All the quirks.

(30:37):
I've been asked and I just, Imean, I don't know, I just
really struggle, not even pasttense, because even beyond 2018
and into the pandemic, likethese ideas that he had or these
ideas that people like him had,because they're just so quick
to believe the propagandamachine about anything that

(31:01):
threatens, you know, the whitenuclear family's way of life.
They're just not interested init.
But I think I realized that ifI wasn't gonna have the patience
and if I wasn't going tomaintain communication with him,
he's never gonna speak toanother gay person in his life,
like he's not gonna have anybodywho's willing to have these

(31:22):
conversations with him.
And my parents actually justgot divorced this summer and I
think that it's because theycouldn't have those
conversations anymore.
And yes, you know he's come along way, but like some things,
he just can't shake.
If you think the election'sstolen, I don't know what to
tell you, because I can onlysend you so many links and poke

(31:46):
so many holes in these silly,silly things you're saying
before.
For your own sanity, you haveto draw a line, you have to draw
a boundary.
So, while I have a goodrelationship with him regarding,
like my personal life, like we,we still struggle to see eye to

(32:06):
eye on the world in many, manyways.
But again, I think it's allbecause of the same reason, like
it's all because the people inpower don't want people to be
breaking down those berries,breaking down those walls,
because then their way of life,where they're sitting pretty on
top without question, isthreatened and they don't want
that at all.

Coach Alex Ray (32:28):
Yeah, makes sense.
Also like we could go so fardown that rabbit hole, but for
today we'll set that one aside.
Thank you for sharing that.
I think that is absolutelyhelpful and useful for everyone
today.
So let's see switching gearshere a little bit.
I would love to hear what is itlike for you being on stage in

(32:49):
front of people.
I mean, you're on a literalstage often and you're also on a
virtual stage.
I mean, you don't have.
You have a sizable onlinefollowing with like what?
Nearly 40,000 followers onInstagram now and almost 50,000
on TikTok.
Like eyeballs are on you.

Quincy Bazen (33:10):
Yes, eyeballs are on me and I think the two very
different experiences for me.
I love being on a real stage,like I've performed my entire
life.
I feel very, very comfortabletalking to large groups of
people.
I do not love the digital stageand I think, if, if, if and if

(33:33):
I truly believe there was anyway for me to be successful in
this industry without socialmedia, I would do it in a
heartbeat.
But, like so many things in 20to 23, it's a necessary evil.
I I don't really know how Iwould promote myself or promote

(33:54):
my actual art without it.
Like and I talked about this acouple months ago with my
boyfriend because I felt likesocial media was becoming this,
this weird, I guess, job that Ihad to do, or like this weird, I
mean and I don't mean todiscredit anyone who like
content, creation is there, istheir life.
I used to have a lot of fundoing that before the pandemic

(34:16):
and I don't know, I just reallylost the spark for it and now
it's become this thing that Ihave to focus on and get people
to care about, so that they willthink about caring about this
other thing that I really wantthem to care about you know
which is you being like on stage, coming to my show, like coming
to my?
show or like watching my webseries, or like following my

(34:39):
acting journey or whatever.
But in order to that, I've gotto be successful on social media
in like all of these ways andall of these different platforms
.
And I don't know, I mean it'sjust, I don't know.
I think I also struggle toowith just like this idea of like
an enclosed perception ofmyself.

(34:59):
Like I don't like the idea somevideo of me popping up or a
picture of me popping up onsomebody who, somebody's page
who's never seen or heard of mebefore, and then that's their
entire perception of who I am.
And obviously this is just likethe internet and I need to get
over it, but I do.
I really do struggle with thisconcept of people not

(35:21):
understanding facets toindividuals and how we're all
multifaceted.
And I don't know, when I startedreally trying to focus on
social media, like a little overa year ago, I think I was like,
okay, I just got to, I just gotto rip the bandaid off.
You know, of course, having anykind of presence comes with
comments that are nice andcomments that aren't nice, and I

(35:44):
had to take the Beyonceapproach and just stop reading
comments, because everyone hasan opinion right and you're
never going to please anybodyand, nope, not everybody's going
to think you're funny andeverybody's going to think that
your content is you know slang,the house down the booties, and
I would just take it reallypersonally.
People would like make fun ofme for something I said and I

(36:06):
was like, oh, but that's noteven true, because look at this
other thing I did, where I wasdoing exactly what you just said
I couldn't have been doing andI was like, you know, I just got
to stop.
And I think this too.
I think when my therapist says Ithink that and I agree that I
think it all goes back to justlike being in the closet and
trying to be a people pleaserfor so much of my life, for the
first two decades of my life,just because if I could just get

(36:26):
people to like me and I couldjust be amenable and mold myself
into this, into whatever Ineeded to be for that situation,
then they wouldn't askquestions and no one's going to
focus on me too much, you know.
But now that I'm not thatperson anymore, it really it
stings a little bit when I don't, when I don't know how to

(36:47):
please these people, and I thinkwhat I've accepted in the past.
Very recently I should reallyturn 30, which was a big moment
for me earlier this year.

Coach Alex Ray (36:56):
You turn 30,.
Okay, I have you believe inbirthday.

Quincy Bazen (36:58):
Thank you.
Thank you, yeah, in May I justhad to.
I didn't want to carry thatwith me into this new decade.
You know, I wanted to justembrace what I have to offer.
You know, I don't ever want tobe like a crowd pleaser in the
sense that I don't know, I don'tknow who I could say right now

(37:22):
without insulting somebody.
But like, for some reason,going to the Big Bang Theory,
like highest rated show ontelevision for too many years,
right and, but it's because itjust appealed to the masses.
But like I don't know anybodythat actually likes that show,
except my mom, but she doesn'tcount, her taste is questionable
.
I don't want to.
I don't want to be.

(37:42):
I want to be.
I want to.
I want to do something that'sless amenable and something
that's more niche and somethingthat's more honest and
individual, because that's whatI am I don't think that I am for
the masses, like I am like avery queer man who has a lot of
sex with boys and I love popmusic and I suddenly I can't

(38:05):
think of anything else I'minterested in.
I love to be and I am obsessedwith the way like I have all
these tiny little things aboutme that I try, I'm trying really
hard to celebrate about myselfin my 30.
And that's what I think I'mtrying to do online as well, and
try to bring the energy that Ihave on stage, of the mentality

(38:25):
I have on stage, into thementality I have when I'm
working on social media.
It's like you know what?
I'm here to have fun, likewhatever.
Like I don't really I don't needto dwell on what every person
in the audience is thinkingbecause I don't like I get up, I
perform and then I leave andI'm like, oh, that was fun, so I
don't need to sit and dwell andwe'll, you know, read comments
like oh, what is?

(38:46):
Like I'm a user one, two, five,three, four, two thinking about
my punchline, like I don't needto worry about that.
So all of that to say I feelvery comfortable on stage and
I'm working on feeling morecomfortable in a digital space
button.
Boom, there we go, rats it up.

Coach Alex Ray (39:06):
I love the punchline the, the summary
sentence you gave us Copywriter.

Quincy Bazen (39:14):
Okay, I'm always going to come to a conclusion
there, you go.

Coach Alex Ray (39:17):
Yes, so you are good at what you do on the side
too.

Quincy Bazen (39:22):
Yeah, you have to be, you have to be.

Coach Alex Ray (39:25):
Um, I mean, I was going to ask you the next
question I had was what do youdo to maintain authenticity with
all these eyes on you?
But I think you really answeredthat question really well there
that you do want to be anauthentic, like multifaceted
person and you see others andpeople in general as not just

(39:47):
this easily summed up.
32nd yeah.

Quincy Bazen (39:51):
I know it's like when I was first starting like
tick tock, specifically like Icould off tick tock for so long.
It was so big during thepandemic and I certainly could
have been working on that andlike building a presence.
But, quite frankly, I was toodepressed to be thinking about
my career.
But when I started focusing onit, all I could really think to
do was like hop on these trends,like because that's what will

(40:11):
get these eyes on me.
But now I'm trying to shift.
I kind of stopped it nowbecause I don't, I don't want to
fucking do that Like I don'twant to be.
I don't want to be a contentcreator.
I don't want to be like writingthese trend waves forever, like
again.
Like I want to make my own art.
I don't want to directattention to it, but I think you
have to play a bit of the gameto that initial audience.

(40:33):
And this is by no means like amasterclass, because I it's very
much a work in progress, butthis is my mentality, I think
for it.

Coach Alex Ray (40:43):
Yes, and that's all we want here.
We don't even have fuckingmasterclass, we just want to
know, hey, what's been workingfor you?
The real shit.

Quincy Bazen (40:50):
That's far.
That's about it.

Coach Alex Ray (40:52):
Yeah, all right.
What to I mean?
You come across as a very, like, confident person who knows who
he is.
What tips do you have for that?
And also like what's yourinternal experience like,
because I know mine can often beway more insecure on the inside
than I appear on the outside.

Quincy Bazen (41:12):
So I'm sure, for sure.
I mean, we're all insecure,totally.
I Wait, what is the question?

Coach Alex Ray (41:19):
Just have to be Okay.
The summary is what tips ofconfidence do you have?
I don't know, because I meanYou're right.

Quincy Bazen (41:34):
People can seem like the most competent person
ever, but you have no ideawhat's going on behind closed
doors.
Honestly I think a lot of wheremy confidence, like my external
confidence, like where thatlight seems to come from is
actually again going back tojust having to push out this
personality of being friendlyand doing again whatever people

(41:58):
need me to do in the time.
So when I was closeted, theyweren't poking holes in this
narrative that I was spinning,and that's not to say that I'm
not confident and that it's allbeen like a trauma response.
But I think that it's adifferent kind of confidence.
As you know, a queer personwearing heels walking down some
downtown alley that I'm doingnow, that I was like at 15, just

(42:22):
walking through the high schooltrying to blend in, you know,
but I don't know, I don't know.
I really struggle to care whatpeople in real life saying which
again is where I'm trying toget to with the digital space
Like I just want to live my lifeand I think that I live my life

(42:44):
in a way that I stay in my ownlane, I'm not bothering anybody
online in real life, like I'mnot here to start shit, like I'm
here for a good time and Ithink that if I want, if I was,
to ask my friends or people thatI know here and like what their
experiences with me.
Like in the room, I would hopethat I'm just like there to have

(43:04):
fun, I'm there to have a goodtime.
I'm like I actually had I had abirthday party again for my
30th and there was some likefriends or friends that showed
up and they reached there tohave a great time and my
boyfriend took that where.
I'm like I want to be betterfriends with them, like I want
that energy in my life all thetime because that's what I want
to get out, like I just want toshow up to have fun and show up
to have a good time.
And I think that a lot of thatenergy maybe comes across as

(43:29):
confidence.
And there are things that I'mvery confident in and there are,
of course, things that I'm notso confident in.
I mean back to, I think, thisyear.
Well, later, last year I decidedthat I wanted to get serious
about acting again.
I hadn't really acted sincebefore the pandemic and of
course, you know, doing stand up, there is performance involved,

(43:50):
but it's I don't always want toperform shit that I write.
You know, I'd love to dosomething with somebody else's
material and I got serious aboutthat and but you know, at the
time I was 29 and like I'm a bitlate to the game, like this is
LA, you know, now 25 is late tothe game.
And I just sat with myself alot and had to ask myself, like
what has taken me so long to getto this place?

(44:12):
Why am I so scared of, you know, being on camera?
And as silly as it was, Irealized I had to get a nose job
.
So I got a nose job in Januaryand my confidence skyrocketed.
I was like, amazing, now I canbe on camera and now I can have
fun.
I feel way more confident justin every aspect of my life.

(44:35):
But like nobody nobody knowsthat I did that because it's
just this thing that I washyper-focused on, and it wasn't
like an egregious change to myface in any way, but it was this
very small, albeit veryexpensive change that I just
needed to make for myself.
And whether it was, you know,actually something that's going

(44:58):
to have any effect on my careerNot sure yet.
Maybe it's just a placeboeffect for me, but that's
totally fine too.
Like I would spend the sameamount of money just to feel the
way that I do about myself andwhat I feel like I'm capable of
now, more so than if you hadasked me and last year, yeah,

(45:19):
yeah.
So just come up.
If you want to feel confident,go get some plastic surgery and
I'm kidding, I'm kidding, I'mkidding, I'm kidding.
Also, a lot of therapy, yes,Absolutely.

Coach Alex Ray (45:36):
And yeah, I mean also.
I love that you brought that up, because I think you know I'm
not sure you know as RuPaul says, everything is drag and we're
all constantly putting on somekind of show, we're always
altering our appearance andthere are certain forms of that
that we deem as like acceptableand righteous, and there's forms

(45:58):
of it that we're like oh my God, something's wrong with them
for getting plastic surgery.
But it's okay to like buyexpensive clothes or facial
products or makeup or like whynot just let people do what the
fuck they want to do, that theyenjoy.

Quincy Bazen (46:14):
It's so true and, to be fair, like half of it was
medical.
But then he's like I can alsojust like straighten this for
you.
I'm like, yeah, do it please.

Coach Alex Ray (46:21):
Please do that.

Quincy Bazen (46:22):
Because I like I don't know, I just again like I
was willing to take this riskfor myself and I think that
there's a nuance to those thingstoo, like if you want to get
plastic surgery, you should getplastic surgery, but I'm not,
I'm never in a position whereI'm like promoting it or like
you need to do this or peopleshould be doing this to their

(46:43):
bodies, or like a certain brandof celebrity that's like always
changing with the hot body shapeis like that shit gives me the
egg, like it really really does.
But I don't think that I'd everwant to like be secretive about
it because, like I did it andI'm totally I'm more than happy
that it's the best thing I everdid for myself, you know, and if
you're doing it to like notfulfill that strong word, but

(47:04):
like to achieve is also thewrong word.

Coach Alex Ray (47:10):
Damn, see, now I know I should have taken that
role, I mean is it just like itwas a desire that you had for
your life, versus oh, I have todo this in order to impress
people.

Quincy Bazen (47:21):
No, I genuinely, I genuinely just didn't feel
comfortable in camera, like Iwould never audition for like
film auditions.
That's why I stuck to the stageprimarily, and when I was
shooting my web series, like Iwas very careful to shoot from
like specific angles of myselfand that's just not like a
sustainable way to exist orsucceed in this industry.
So it really felt like I don'tknow, maybe it's actually sounds

(47:43):
bad when I say it that way LikeI have to turn for the industry
, but I was, I was willing togive it a go, you know.
And again, like I didn't doanything super crazy, like you
saw a picture of me before andyou saw a picture now, like I
don't think that it would besuper obvious, but I don't know
it was.
It was something that I wascomfortable doing and something
I thought about since I was 20.

(48:04):
And I'm I don't know.
I like to blame my parents forit, actually, because my mom so
my two younger siblings, right,and everybody was C-sectioned
except for me, where she triedto give birth to me 12 hours,
naturally, before they were.
Maybe she just do a C-section.
And so when I went into myinitial consultation, the doctor

(48:25):
was like, have you ever brokenyour nose and then it just like
healed in correctly.
And I was like, no, but, dotdot, dot, my mom did try to
deliver me via her canal forlike 12 hours before the
doctor's shoulder wasn'thappening.
He was like, yeah, that's whathappened.
So I sent my parents the billfor the situation.
I was just doing my best, thecircumstances I was given.

Coach Alex Ray (48:48):
Okay, yes, yes, too funny.
Well, okay, I want to ask acouple of questions that the
audience asked.
So let's, let's like rapid firethese real quick.
The first one this is like adeep question, so do your like
quick answer here?

(49:09):
Okay, I think we already kindof got my specialty, but let's
try mine either, so we'll see.
All right, how has how let menot punch the mic how has having
a concertive upbringingadjusted your views of your self
worth?

Quincy Bazen (49:28):
Great question, also something I tackle a lot in
my show, I think.
For you know kind of what Iwhat I spoke about earlier, like
it.
Just it put me in a box and itfelt like I needed.
I never thought about breakingout of the box.
So I thought about how do Isurvive in this box, how can I
thrive in this box?
And after a while you just kindof come to that not really

(49:55):
seeming like a feasible optionfor you and I think you come to
a place and you're like I've hadsome I'm already off the chart
of quick answers here, but youknow I've had.
I've been very open, like in mywe have frozen here.
But, of course, what's?
What's the cliche phrase aboutcoming out?

(50:16):
It's like it gets better andlike.
I hate to say that, but God,it's so true, it really is so
true.
Things that are cliche arecliche for a reason because my
life pre coming out just feelslike a different one, like it's
just a different person.
That's why I was laughingearlier.
When I think about it, likeI've come so far from I hope who

(50:40):
knows what will be impactingnext week from my therapy counts
, but I've come so far from likethe trauma of my childhood that
it really does like I feel likeI have to, like I don't know,
log back into that email in mymind and I think, god, like,
like, where have I put all thesethings?
Because I genuinely don't thinkabout it anymore.
I feel very far, I feel veryremoved from my conservative

(51:00):
upbringing and certainly not byaccident.
I've done that to myself and Iwould do it a thousand times
over again.
But I think that, to answer thequestion, one sentence it has
made me very rebellious and veryproud and almost a spiteful way
, like I love to show up again,just like in the gayest thing

(51:21):
you could imagine and just likestare down the bikers on the
street as I'm walking past in mylittle heels and fish nets.
Like I just put on a show.
I love to piss people off too.
I'm also petty, so there's that.

Coach Alex Ray (51:37):
Love it.
So I mean it sounds like justit did have an effect.
It sounds like on your selfworth, but as you've worked
through that in therapy andeverything it's, that has had a
tremendous impact on the waythat you, on purpose, like, dare
yourself to just show up andpiss people off.

Quincy Bazen (51:58):
Yeah, you have to build those self confidence
bricks back brick by brick, notto use another wall metaphor I'm
all over the place, but it'strue.

Coach Alex Ray (52:06):
Very true.
Um, okay, let's see, let's dotwo more.
All of these were submittedanonymously, so let's see.

Quincy Bazen (52:13):
Oh, I know, I know .

Coach Alex Ray (52:14):
Sorry, so I don't have any any name to add
to these, but um, what issomething about your identity
that people might not know atfirst glance?

Quincy Bazen (52:26):
I'm dancing to?
Hmm, god, I feel there's somany ways to take that question.
I don't know.
I um, yeah, but I wouldn't beable to answer that question
anymore.
Whatbody in the audience?
I use, I use he, him pronounsin my, in my daily life.

(52:48):
But for a while and I think Ithink the year and a half coming
out of quarantine which I guess, just like the last two years
in general, I'm like moving toLA was very freeing.
You know, it felt like suddenlythere were, there were no holds
barred.
You know, being in your house,locked up all the time, not
seeing anybody just now, likebeing in Santa Monica on the

(53:09):
streets.
It was probably where you canreally do anything and be anyone
and nobody's going to blinktwice.
And I think that first year ofme living here was very that.
You know, every party you go tohas a theme, every event has
like a dress code.
One of the first parties I wentto and I went here was you
could only wear black and whiteor you wouldn't be led in.
I'm like, oh, this is the mostI think I've ever heard of.

(53:30):
So I was living for it and I wasreally loving exploring my
femininity and I had lost abunch of weight post pandemic
and I loved feeling like thispretty little girly and there
was a few months there where Iwas like thinking a lot about
how, like and I mean, of course,like pronouns are just like

(53:50):
always in the discourse and notreally long as concerned as to
shut the fucking thinking aboutmy own identity.
And I was doing a lot ofthinking about how again, like
how I, how I felt, like I wantedto be perceived versus how I
wanted to live my life.
And I went around and aroundwith that for a while and I had
conversations with, you know,people that I love and people

(54:12):
that love me, and I think itcame to the conclusion that like
I, he, him, he, him feels goodfor me and like I love dressing
very feminine and I lovetackling the feminine side of me
and, but I think most of all,like I love standing in the face
of man.

(54:32):
You know, I love standing inthe face of this idea of what a
man should be and saying, well,actually, a man can be anything.
I'm a man too.
I can wear whatever I wantbecause of it.
So I don't know that actuallyanswers the question, but that's
where my mind went when hearingidentity.

Coach Alex Ray (54:50):
I love that answer.
That is such a fun, fun thingto learn about you.
Okay, thank you for that.
Let's see one last question,again anonymous, here.
Where or with whom do you feelthe strongest sense of community
?

Quincy Bazen (55:09):
Hmm, okay, two separate things, because I feel
like with whom is easy?
It's with my boyfriend, owen,love of my life, that's
personally I've ever met.
The reason that I'm chasing mydreams is because he's
encouraged me and he's helpedput up those bricks of my own
self confidence.
So I have to say him communityis interesting because I think

(55:35):
that there was a time where Icould have said LA, but because,
again, because you can't justbe anybody and it's so free here
.
But I think there's also likethis other side of LA that feels
like a competition and it feelslike everybody's trying to be

(55:55):
something or do something, whichis great, and it's one of the
reasons I'm here.
But after a while that can itcan wear you down.
No, it's like hot fuck why I'mnot doing XYZ.
Like you know, this guy isdoing.
Another reason that I reallystruggle with being online.
I wish to death I could just beoffline and do my own thing,

(56:16):
but that's not the world we livein.
So to where?
gosh maybe like the middle ofthe high tops dance floor.
When I'm just dancing on aFriday night, I feel really free
and again like it's inHollywood.
So like you can feel free and Iam I took a trip to PV for my

(56:40):
30th event.
No, you have to go.
I'd never walked into a citythat was so full of gay people,
especially in a foreign country,and like I've seen my fair
share of our foreign countries,I was just I mean, I worked for
my boat we just thought it waslike the trip of our lifetimes,
like I was just so enamored withhow comfortable and safe I felt

(57:03):
and I don't know.
It seems like a weird randomanswer, but that's what's coming
to me here in this moment.
So I'm going to say, in PV withmy man and love it.
Sorry, all over the top.
This is all the top.

Coach Alex Ray (57:21):
Everyone listening right now is laughing
us.
I know they are.
They're having a great time, ifthey like listening to me on
because I do about 50 50 nowsolo and guest episodes.
If they like listening to me,they're going to enjoy this.
They're minor, very chaotic.
Okay, good, like hi.
I have a message for you, butfirst I'm going to talk about 30

(57:43):
minutes or other things, andthen I'll give it to you at the
end in five seconds.
It's a lot of four.
Play a lot of four.
Play, alright, y'all.
If you want to be able to askquestions of future guests,
you've got to join the Instagrambroadcast channel and in there
you'll be able to ask yourquestions and join in on the

(58:03):
conversation, as well as getmore insight information about
upcoming guests Before we headout.
Quincy, what else do you wantto share with our listeners
today?
Where can they find you?
What can they do?
How can they support you?
How can they get more of you?

Quincy Bazen (58:16):
You can find me on any relevant platform at look
at, quincy, I'm doing shows.
I'm always doing shows, but I'mdoing my show in New York, in
LA, this fall, so look out forthat announcement coming very
soon and I would love to seeeverybody there and I'd love to.
I love meeting people, I lovesaying hello and then, yeah, of

(58:39):
course, come listen to Dom Popas well.
If you love hearing me ramblethat, you want to hear me ramble
out pop music.

Coach Alex Ray (58:47):
There you go, so we'll have links to that in the
show notes for everyone.
It's you and your friend Haydenright who do Dom Pop together.
Cool, well, link all of this inthe show notes and go follow
Quincy.
Go enjoy all of his stuff.
Alright, any final words beforewe head out today.

Quincy Bazen (59:08):
This was so much fun.
I really appreciate it.
Thank you, alex.
Such a fun conversation.

Coach Alex Ray (59:12):
You're so welcome.
I'm so glad that I was able tohave you on the show today and
that we could all learn somethings from you, so thanks for
being here.

Quincy Bazen (59:20):
Thank you, bye guy .

Coach Alex Ray (59:23):
Bye everyone, I'll see you on the next episode
.