EP 37: The Art of Integration: Kristin Miller on Balancing Career, Life, and Personal Growth

🎙️ Podcast Episode Highlights with Kristin Miller

• Navigating Mid-Career Crossroads: Kristin shares how her journey through theater, sales, and sports management led to burnout, and ultimately, a career pivot into coaching.

• From Burnout to Breakthrough: After a decade with the Milwaukee Brewers and experiencing anxiety attacks, Kristin realized she had never paused to ask: "Is this what I really want?" That moment sparked a transformation.

• Coaching Through Language & Reflection: Kristin explains how writing exercises and examining thought patterns help clients uncover limiting beliefs and find clarity, without needing someone to hand them the answers.

• Beyond Work-Life Balance: The conversation redefines “balance” as integration, with Kristin offering a more realistic and compassionate framework for managing energy during different seasons of life and career.

Kristin's LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kristinmiller79/

Kristin's Website: https://www.snhacademy.com/

David's LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/david-young-mba-indy/

David's Website: https://davidjyoung.me/

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:08):
Welcome to the Real you Podcast.
This is episode 37.
I'm David Young, your host.
I'm a LinkedIn content andbusiness coach.
I help coaches with less than3000 followers sign more clients
using content and LinkedInstrategically.
I launched this podcast inMarch of 2024 to spotlight
interesting people doing amazingthings.
Today I'm joined by KristenMiller, a career and life coach
for mid-career professionalwomen.
A diehard Dave Matthews Bandfan and fellow Midwesterner with

(00:31):
a uniquely diverse background,kristen helps high-achieving
women who feel stuck,overwhelmed or uncertain about
their next career move findclarity, confidence and a path
forward.
In this episode, we'll diveinto her journey how she
leverages LinkedIn to grow herbusiness, the highs and lows of
solopreneurship, and how sheuses story work to help
professional women navigate thepivotal moments in their careers
and lives.
Kristen, thanks so much formaking time for me today.

Speaker 2 (00:54):
Oh, thank you for making time for me.

Speaker 1 (00:56):
I jokingly sent you an email back when you sent me
your bio that this probably isjust going to be an hour of
tattoos, dave Matthews andbaseball, and then at the very
end, we'll just be like Kristencoaches, career women reach out
and if that happens if you'relistening and that happens,
you'll know.
You'll know why.
Um, yeah, so no, it's great,great to have you on.
We've recently connected onLinkedIn.

(01:19):
I love your energy and I loveyour content.
It always just feels verypositive and motivational or
inspiring.

Speaker 2 (01:30):
Well, I appreciate that feedback because that's a
very conscientious intention Imade is that I know that when I
look back to who I would havewanted to be coached by right
and who I ended up being coachedby years ago, I would have
wanted to feel inspired and likeit was possible, and so that

(01:53):
really is where I try toapproach my content from.
Is this place of like not mespeaking down of like here's how
you should be doing something,but like, yeah, I get it and
here's what's possible?

Speaker 1 (02:06):
Yeah, no, it's.
I mean it definitely shows.
I mean I look at, I look at alot of content.
I read a lot of posts prettymuch every day, monday through
Friday, and like you can tellwhat you're talking about, like
the ones that are just a littlebit kind of talking down or a
little dry or boring.
Um, not there's anything wrongwith that, but it's's just.
It's a different way to do it,but yours never.
I never feel that way withyours, like they always just

(02:27):
have.
It's interesting, right like anenergy through the screen.
It's a little bit hard todescribe, but I don't know.
There's a certain energy I get,whether I'm on my phone or my
computer with with your post,that always I feel like it's
like radiating through my screen.
So good for you thank you.

Speaker 2 (02:42):
I don't know that you would say that about my content
about a year ago.
It's a practice.
I've put a ton of work into itand next to the compliment I
more recently received that'sprobably one of the best
compliments I could get was thatmy energy is coming through my
posts.
But I think the best and youwould agree, I think the best
compliment you can get is whensomeone's like, oh, you were in
my head.

(03:03):
Oh, that was the best.
I got that recently.
Someone's like, oh, your post.
I felt like you were in my head.
I was like, okay, All right,Ding ding, Winner, winner.

Speaker 1 (03:14):
Yeah, that's when you know you're doing it correctly,
Especially if that person is ayou know I hate the word ideal
client, but someone that youcould potentially work with,
Like if you're really speakingtheir language, then that's when
you know that you're reallydialed in and tapped into their
frustrations, their struggles,kind of what they want Cause as
a coach.
Right, that's your, that's yourgoal is you're?
You're giving them hope andoptimism that they're in a place

(03:36):
right now that they don'tnecessarily want to be, in,
which typically isn't by choice.
They just end up there, they'renot really sure how to get out
or what to do.
And so as a coach, right you're, you're not giving them all the
answers, you're not tellingthem what to do, but you're,
you're radiating back to them,you're asking questions, you're
trying to figure out some thingsfor them, you're helping them
kind of see it.
And then they now have, theynow have hope and optimism to go

(03:59):
forward.
I think it's, it's like themain.
I mean, there's lots ofdifferent ways to do it.
There's lots of coaching.
But I think all coaching kind ofboils down to that general
premise is that you're helpingthem move forward in whatever
way that looks like.

Speaker 2 (04:10):
Yeah, and I love that you specifically said like
you're not trying to give themthe answers, because that's the
first thing I say.
In fact, I just came off of adiscovery call.
I have another one after thisand I clearly, when someone asks
like well, what would it belike to work with you, the first
thing I say is like I have zeroanswers for you.
I am not the coach that's goingto come in and be like here's

(04:33):
what I recommend you do.
That's a consultant, Okay, Acoach, like.
My job as a coach is to ask theright questions.
Right, and the work that I doin terms of the framework that I
work within, my methodology islooking at their words.
So it makes sense how now,after blogging all of these
hours coaching and havingdiscovery calls, that I am

(04:57):
getting that feedback because Iliterally am using their words.
So I take what I hear indiscovery calls through coaching
sessions and I look at thatthrough line of like okay, this
one specific phrase keeps comingup over and over again.
Clearly there's something here.

Speaker 1 (05:15):
Yeah, no, that's great and I think more people
should do that.
I think too many coaches try tothink about what they should be
saying.
But when you're having againsales calls, discovery calls,
even connection calls, ifthey're loosely adjacent to what
you do, then yeah, taking thosewords like verbatim and putting
that back into your contentbecause other people if one
person's saying or thinking it,there are many that are saying
and thinking it 100%.

(05:36):
I hired three career coacheswhen I was struggling with my
career.
The first two I won't say theywere a waste of money, but they
certainly didn't go like Ithought, and part of that was my
fault, because I thought thatthey would give me the answers
Like I.
I, the first guy had me take abunch of tests, so I took like

(05:57):
the wonder lick which I used togive the NFL quarterbacks, and I
took a career personality testand then, I think, like a
personal interest test, and thenwe just talked about like those
results and at the end I kindof thought he'd be like do this
and he didn't.
He told me to quit sales.
That's the only thing he toldme, cause I was working in sales
at the time.
I had a 2% match to the salesprofile.
So he was like we have to quitsales as soon as you leave my

(06:18):
office.
And I was like, no, seriously,go to your car when we're done,
call your boss and be like Iquit my career coach just told
me to quit.
I was like, ah, that seems alittle abrupt.
Anyway, that was his advice.

Speaker 2 (06:31):
That doesn't sound like advice.
That sounds like astraightforward answer there.
My God, how did that feel whenhe told you to do that?

Speaker 1 (06:39):
I mean, I didn't think he was wrong, it's just
you.
You know, I didn't haveanything lined up so I was like
I don't, I can keep writing thisout, I can make a few dollars.
I wasn't that bad at it, um, Ijust wasn't the best um.
But I was like I can sell acouple more units.
I think the second, the secondperson, it was five calls.
She was a big disc.
I've taken all the career notall, but most most of the major

(07:02):
career tests.
I've taken something yeah shewas a big disc person.
That was the one that I wasn'tfamiliar with, but I knew I was
a high c because I'm, you know,highly organized, detail
oriented, numbers data.
Like I knew I was a c, I didn'tneed to take the test yeah I
took it and it was, I was like areally high c, like almost like
the highest you could be.
So I was like, all right, nonew information.
And then at the end, um it was,she gave me like eight possible

(07:24):
careers.
She gave me like a list, it waslike a recap of what we talked
about, and then it was likethese, these eight you know
potential careers would be yours.
And I was like awesome, we'venarrowed it down to eight.
Let's hope I can guesscorrectly anyway.
The third one was I.
Then I spent like 5x the money.
It was 12 weeks and it was likea whole program.

(07:44):
That was kind of the beginningof the journey I'm on now, but
anyway.
So I'm very familiar withcareer work and I think it is a
misconception that people arehiring career coaches because
they just want the answers.

Speaker 2 (07:56):
You know what's interesting, what I'm finding
through conversations with thewomen that I work with.
Right, so I work with women whoare mid-career-ish.
They're not right out of thegates, out of college and
they're not at the tail endtrying to figure out retirement
plans, but they're somewhere inthe middle.
And what I've heard more andmore often that was I don't say

(08:16):
it shouldn't be surprising to me, because when I found my coach
she is deemed a life coach and Iknew what I was walking into
because, well, my life feltpretty freaking rough at the
moment, but most women,especially mid-career, they
don't, like they haven't heardof a career coach and or don't
identify with it as somethingthat could be beneficial to them

(08:39):
.
And I very much resonate withthat when, when I look back, I
remember getting to that pointwhere my life was such a mess
because I had let my careercompletely take over and I was
on the wrong path.
I had looked at my boss, whowas a female, a female CRO, and
she had an executive coach, andI was like, well, I'm not an

(09:02):
executive, so I guess I don'tget a coach, and so that's
honestly what I'm finding moreand more often is women saying I
didn't even know there was asuch thing.
I didn't know there was a coachfor me, and so I very much
leaned into that language oflike.
Here's who I help maybe careerprofessional women, and what I

(09:25):
specifically help them with isfiguring out their what's next,
whether that's professionally orpersonally.
Usually it's both.
Let's be honest.

Speaker 1 (09:32):
We're all tied together.

Speaker 2 (09:35):
Yeah, we don't only talk about work at work and only
talk about our personal livesat home.
We don't unzip our human skinand become someone completely
different.
So it is very interesting thatyou had that experience, and it
does sound like without thatclarity of like, here's what you
actually get, because peoplewomen do ask me that, well, what

(09:56):
do I get?
But I always go back to what isyour challenge?
Like in your words, what isyour biggest challenge right now
?
And that's what we tackle.

Speaker 1 (10:08):
Yeah, no, it's a good .
It's a good approach.
And again, asking the probingquestions, trying to figure out,
like you said, kind of wherethey've been, what their journey
is that led them to that pointsimilar to you, and then and
then where you want to go fromthere, and some people don't
have any idea where they want togo, so then that's actually
ends up being a big part of thecoaching is like literally
trying to figure that out.
Right, Because you can't go toD if you're like I don't even

(10:32):
know where A is Right.
You have to, it has to besomewhat, you know, thoughtful,
what.
So what happened in your?
You don't have to walk throughyour whole career, but you
obviously worked for a whilebefore.
You kind of have done full-timecoaching these last couple of
years, um, kind of yeah, justbriefly kind of touch on like
career recap and kind of how youwent through that and like what

(10:52):
that felt like as you werequote unquote working, you know,
traditional type jobs?

Speaker 2 (10:58):
Um, well, I have had.
I guess I've been at the what'snext crossroads several times
over.
So I, out of college.
I was a theater major incollege.
So out of college, I actuallywent to go visit a friend out in
New York and decided I had tolive there.
This was right after nine, 11.
So it was not the time everyonewas flocking to go live in New

(11:19):
York city, except for well, Idecided that that was the thing
I had to do, except for me.
So I got accepted to a trainingprogram out there, hit it hard
and realized about a year and ahalf and I was like this is not,
I'm not getting enjoyment outof this anymore, like what I
once felt doing acting I nowdread it.
So let's figure something out.

(11:41):
And while I was figuring outwhat that, what net, what's next
, I just did what I hadnaturally found myself into, and
at that time it was catering.
I had done a lot of cateringand I started working with
Citigroup Executive ConferenceCenter and helping with their
high end, their executiveclients, all the way up to the
president of Citigroup, walkinghim to his dining room every day

(12:04):
.
So I started dabbling in likethis premium space, and had a
relationship that didn't workout and decided I was going to
pit stop back home in Milwaukeeuntil I figured out my next,
what's next?
And I ended up going back intosales.
Sales was something.
I took the test and they'relike you should be in sales.
It was the opposite they'relike you should be selling.

(12:27):
And so, out of college, while Iwas still figuring out the
acting thing I had dabbled in, Istarted selling cell phones.
I think a friend of mine waslike oh, we're hiring at the
local mall and so, yeah, I wentand did that for a while so I
knew I could sell.
I went and did that for a whileso I knew I could sell.

(12:47):
So I went on to then selleverything from cars to payroll
in HR systems, to hospitalitypackages, to the Masters Super
Bowl and MLB All-Star game.
So I had combined this salesexperience with this premium
clientele experience, broughtthat all together and it was
then through.
There I had a connection andapplied for and subsequently got

(13:07):
my job with the MilwaukeeBrewers, where it was,
ironically, my only non-salesjob I've had in the last 23
years.
I was actually the director ofservices and I think was so
successful in that role becauseI understood the sales side of
the business.
I spent 10 years there and well, as COVID became a thing and

(13:29):
the world was shutting down, Iwas literally in Arizona with
clients for spring training.
We were getting them on the busready to go to spring training
when MLB made the announcementthat no more spring training and
opening day was postponed.
So that was a very interestingweekend in Arizona with over a
hundred clients, no access toany baseball, much less baseball

(13:52):
players or anything.
And, yeah, little did we knowit was our last vacation we were
going to have for quite sometime, came back home, never knew
I was going to never walk backinto what was then Miller Park,
never see my office ever again.
As many companies had to makethe tough decision to do, they

(14:12):
furloughed a bunch of people.
I said, all right, well, what'snext?
So I then was actually asked bya vendor at the time go back
into sales.
And I went into luxury giftingand I sold two pro sports teams.
Long story short, I kept findingmyself throughout all these
cycles that I would throw myselfinto my work and never once

(14:35):
checked in with like, okay, thisthing that I do really really
well, that clearly I don't knowhow to.
I mean, they're a hundredpercent or zero.
I don't know how to dosomething, just a little bit of
the ways.
Is this what I really want?
And after I think it was so itwas fall of 23.
That's when I said my life kindof felt really, really messy.

(14:55):
I was having panic attacks andanxiety attacks.
I had been on the road for threemonths.
I totaled it all up.
I had been traveling.
I have a at the time.
She would have been what six,five five-year-old daughter.
My husband also owns his ownbusiness.
He's also a baseball coach, soour lives are busy and I was
like, oh, I wonder why I'mfeeling a tremendous amount of

(15:16):
stress and pressure as the topproducer at the organization,
taking on more.
And I got to a point where Iwas like something needs to
change here.
And what is it that I want?
I never stopped to ask myselfthat I always just done the
thing I did really well, becausethe test told me yeah, you do

(15:36):
this really well, you should godo this.

Speaker 1 (15:37):
Yeah Well, I think it's an interesting shift and I
see this a lot.
I saw it in my own path.
I see it a lot on LinkedIn.
I think it comes with age,maturity, life experience, where
you and I are fairly close inage I have you by a few years
but we were taught to go toschool and get a job and then
work forever.
And most of us did that and wedidn't really question it and

(15:59):
even if we were super unhappy,it didn't matter because that's
all all we knew to do.
And so I think there comes apoint and technology certainly
has helped but you get to acertain point in life where
you're like all right, is thisit?
Like, do I just have to keepdoing this?
There's got to be somethinglike I feel this calling or itch
to do something else, like Idon't, I don't know.
And so I think it's interestinghow we hit those.

(16:21):
Like you said, sometimes ithappens multiple times, but you
hit those patches where you juststart questioning, like
everything that you that youhaven't spent a lot of time
questioning before because youwere just so busy just doing and
going, and like this is whatI'm supposed to do and whatever.
And then you're like hmm, Idon't know, this doesn't feel
aligned or whatever.
so I think it's interesting howthat kind of happens.

(16:43):
You don't see a lot this, Idon't think this happens a lot
with like 24 year olds.

Speaker 2 (16:47):
No, and here's the thing I will say.
I think that, like you said, Ithink there might be something a
little bit generallygenerationally different, if you
will, in terms of and I'm allfor it, I'm all for this
generation who is approachingthings differently, but but
you're right, there's, therecomes this a lot of the language
that we use is like somethingfeels off.

(17:11):
We might not be able topinpoint what it is, but like
something isn't right.
And this thing of like is thisit?
I actually posted about ittoday on LinkedIn.
You commented it not onlyhappens when we get to the point
of like man, I am like notfeeling, like I'm feeling, like
I'm grinding, I'm not gettinganywhere, and it also happens at
the very opposite end, where,at the very peak, you would
finally achieve the thing thatyou like had set out all these

(17:32):
years to do, and you're likewait, is this it?
Is this really it?
And it doesn't feel the way youwanted it to feel.
And at the end of the day, wespend one third of our lives
working, like you think about ityour whole life, and like
retirement happens and you're akid, literally a third of your
life is working.
So how and why did we get tothis point of like just it sucks

(17:57):
, but you got to do it anyway.
It's like, and it doesn't haveto be that way.

Speaker 1 (18:01):
Yeah, it is.
Honestly, it's probably evenmore than a third, because that
probably does that take intoaccount, like when you're a kid,
because the first 18 yearsdon't count.
So if it's, if you're working40, but you don't start that
clock until you're 22, it'sreally, it's actually more, I
think.
Um, cause, right, cause it'syour adult life.

Speaker 2 (18:18):
And let's also now account for how much time we
spend thinking about our work.

Speaker 1 (18:23):
Right yeah.

Speaker 2 (18:24):
Right, so not only yeah.
When you were a kid, I mean, Istarted working.
I was 16.
The second, I could get a job.
I wanted to get a job because II don't know why it was so
quick I was the opposite, I putit off as long as possible.
Oh no, I had the.
I had the job right out thegate.
I was working for MilwaukeeCounty Parks.
I was taking tickets to get tothe pool.

Speaker 1 (18:47):
I was like lifeguarding the kiddie pool.
I was also cutting the grass.

Speaker 2 (18:49):
You were hustling early.
I have been hustling since Ican remember and yeah, I mean
not only that.
So, like you said, to accountfor, like when you're a kid.
But how much time do we spendthinking about our work and you
know, telling our come home andtalk to our partner, you won't
believe what happened.
And this and thinking about amI in the right spot?
There's so much mental realestate that our work being like

(19:13):
the legacy we're going to live,as part of our legacy, that we
think about.

Speaker 1 (19:17):
Yeah, and that's why the whole work-life balance,
it's such a misnomer because itdoesn't exist right, it's a
false term because, like yousaid, you can't, there is no
stop start, you don't separate.
Um, I mean, yeah, obviously youhave to figure out a way to
make it work, and especiallyfamily, but it's all blended and
that's why you mentioned, like,whether you're a career coach,

(19:40):
life coach is going to be mixedin, and if you're a life coach,
career is going to be mixed in,and if you're a life coach,
career is going to be mixed in,because there is no separation.
You have to figure out a way tomake them coexist.

Speaker 2 (19:51):
Yeah, I call it integration.
I think I've been using thatword for quite some time because
balance, it's the insinuationthat there needs to be equal
parts at some point.
And, to your point, any givenday is going to look different.
At any given season is going tolook different.
I mean, when I first started mycoaching business, yeah, I mean
those levels were verydifferent.
And you know, now, as mydaughter gets older and gets

(20:13):
more involved in gymnastics andthe things that she's doing,
it's, yeah, there are days I amdone at four o'clock like I am
done because I gotta her and Igot to get out the door and all
the things.
So it's integration.
And then I think, because ofthat integration and that blend,
there is no defined.
I remember my dad.
He would come home from theoffice and his work was at the

(20:36):
office.
There was no cell phones, therewas no laptop computers.
If he wasn't at the office hewasn't working.
Well, we've got these littlecomputers that are on us at all
times.
It's all the more important toset boundaries, to have these
defined boundaries of this isand have it be very clear,

(20:57):
because it's very easy to getpulled in so many directions,
particularly women who, like Isaid, raising kids and running
households and the expectationsthere that if you don't have
that understanding of what thatintegration specifically looks
like for you, it can beabsolutely exhausting.

Speaker 1 (21:18):
Yeah, for sure.
So how do you balance that?
Because I'm approaching a yearof doing full-time online
business and I find it hard toshut off because I'm always
thinking about it.
I'm always coming up with ideas,whether it's sales or marketing
or content, or whatever thepodcast, there's always
something for me to be thinkingabout or working on.
So it's hard to just stop,because then I feel like I'm

(21:41):
wasting time or I'm not beingefficient enough, right, but
which is false, because, a youjust need breaks and b like it
doesn't grow 24, 7.
That's, that doesn't exist,right?
So, yeah, how do you manage,like being a mom and a wife and
running a business and like allthe other, just facets and
aspects of life, what, what doyou?

(22:02):
How do you set those boundaries?
Like, how do you make it, youknow, make it go, without
feeling, you know, burnt out?

Speaker 2 (22:10):
Well, that's a great question.
I think it has a lot to do withmy thought patterns and really
examining those thought patterns, and I do that.
Obviously I have a coach, Iwork with a coach and I do that
through.
You know writing, so theframework with which I use in
lifted method technology, it haseverything to do with writing
down your words, so I can onlyexamine my thinking when I see

(22:34):
it.
It's really hard to examineyour thinking when it's just
swirling in your head.
So when I get my thoughts onpaper and I can look at the
words that I'm using and am Iusing pressure language, am I
using negations?
Am I using soft talk that to mewill indicate and it absolutely
does indicate how you feel,because our words, they create

(22:55):
energy and they have the powerto make us feel certain things.
So not only getting my thoughtsdown on paper and my stories
down on paper and then reallylooking at them for accuracy,
right, like I need to be workingall the time.
I thought that, oh geez, well,when I say that and I think that
it makes me feel pressure, ispressure what I want to feel?

(23:17):
No, I can work all the time.
Okay, that feels like lesspressure.
I can work all the time.
Does it make sense to work allthe time?
No, I can replace work all thetime with relax.
Sometimes I can relax,sometimes, oh, that feels better
.
Okay, what does relaxing looklike to me and what happens as a
result of me relaxing?
Right, so it's really divinginto the language.

(23:39):
And, as one of my clients toldme this morning, she's like I
had no idea what I actuallyneeded was to rewire my brain.
And in rewiring my brain and mythought patterns that I had
ingrained for years and yearsand years, only then am I able
to start to change the thingsthat I do based on my thinking
now.
So then, if my thought patternstarts as I need to be working

(24:01):
all the time and we get into aplace of I can rest sometimes,
now I can carve out time in myschedule.
Okay, where is the rest goingto live?
Okay, the rest is going to liveon Saturday afternoons and
Saturday evenings, as well asmost of the day on Sunday.
I'm going to get up, I'm goingto do a little work on Sunday
morning because, like you, I getthose thoughts like the

(24:22):
creativity, and I'm like likeI'm just going to come in here
and I'm going to dump them allout and I'll pick them up again
later.
So the I have found that andreally examining my thought
patterns around my work, likeyou said, you brain dump it.

Speaker 1 (24:57):
Do you have a specific writing process, like
when you say, you write it down?
What does that look like?

Speaker 2 (25:03):
It honestly depends on the day.
So I love there are some dayswhere I'm like I just need to
type it into Google Doc realquick, or I might even put it in
my phone in my notes app andcome back to it.
Then there are, depending onwhat's coming up.
There are some mornings where Iwill sit down.
If homework didn't take anexceptionally long, frustrating

(25:23):
time with my second grader, Iwill come in my office and I
will write in an actual journaland I will look at my writing
and I'll cross things out andI'll play with it.
And there are some days whenit's just getting some gratitude
out because I'm feeling afrustration where I'm like I
don't like.
I am not the person who's like.
Every day, from eight to eight,seventeen, I write in this one
particular, I can't like.

(25:44):
I there's, there's, I got toebb and flow.
So I know that there are sometimes where it's going to be
like I'm going to write down 10questions.
What are the 10 most pressingquestions in my brain right now?
I'm going to write down 10questions.
What are the 10 most pressingquestions in my brain right now?
And then I'll write them out,because Kinlan's law says that
anything written down.
Any question written down that'ssufficiently worded is already

(26:07):
half answered.
So it's like how do I practiceexamining my thinking?
And then how do I take that andhave it then work for me?
What does it tell me aboutmyself?
How does it make me feel?
How do I want to feel?
What do I need to adjust?
So, depending on the day, itcould look very different.
It could be typing in GoogleDoc, typing in my phone, or if
I'm walking my dog and I have athought, I will voice note it to

(26:29):
myself and then I will findtime, generally on a Saturday or
at the end of the week, where Iwill kind of pull all that
stuff together and take a lookat it.
But sometimes it's just amatter of again getting the
questions out, dumping them outof my brain rather than let them
ruminate and swirl up there.

Speaker 1 (26:50):
Yeah, that's interesting.
You mentioned walking the dog.
I think I have some of my mostcreative thoughts when I walk
him, but I don't take my phoneon walks, so I have to force
myself to remember them.

Speaker 2 (27:00):
Oh, why is it that you don't take your phone with
you?

Speaker 1 (27:02):
It's just, I feel like my phone's with me all the
time.
It's just, I don't know, I justneed a break and so I usually
walk.
it depends on the weather, buttypically a couple like 25 or 30
minute walks and I don't knowthere's something about not age
is not having the phone itforces me to be more present and
then I just I hear you knowsounds in the neighborhood or I

(27:23):
pay more attention to what he'sdoing, and then inevitably, like
just stuff will pop into myhead, be like, oh, this is idea
for a post, or oh, I could dothis.
Like it's amazing, like once wedisconnect and your brain just
has a chance to just settle,just even doesn't even take that
long where it's just notplugged in.
And then it just has this yeah,this ability to be like what

(27:44):
about this idea, what about this?
So, um, but yeah, I don't, Idon't take my phone.
There's a lot of people in myneighborhood that, um, they have
very loud conversations ontheir phone while they're
walking their dogs.

Speaker 2 (27:53):
You have one of those too, I want to tackle them.

Speaker 1 (27:56):
I want to just take the dog and just go cross body,
block them and be like can younot have this conversation right
now?
How long is this walk going tobe?
Can't this conversation wait?
It's not going to be a fourhour walk, so you have those too
, okay.

Speaker 2 (28:10):
So, first and foremost, yes, I also walk
without my phone, and I found Iwas getting that same thing
where I already had a creativeidea, and then I would lose it
by the time I got home because Ithought about so many other
things.
Like a little, like a little oldschool, like a journalist, like
a little you know the little Icould, I could, and what I found
is I'm going to have my phonewith me Also.

(28:33):
I'll be honest, like, as awoman, I've just gotten used to
always having my phone with mewhen I walk.
We don't have to go there, butyes, and also I'll voice record
it, but I do.
I love technology-free walks,so it'll be with me, but I won't
be using it.
And then, yes, I also have awoman.
There's a woman same thing, butshe does no dog speaker.

(28:57):
A woman there's a woman samething, but she does no dog
speakerphone.
She doesn't even have earbudsin.
Yeah, they do you can't nobodycan see this, but I'm yeah, they
hold.
It's where you hold the phoneout and you talk into the bottom
of the phone.

Speaker 1 (29:06):
Yeah, it's that.
And sometimes it's like 7.30 inthe morning and it's like,
first of all, who are youtalking to at seven 30 in the
morning, like who's up, that'sin your network, that you're
having this like seriousconversation.
If I'm talking to anybody atseven 30, it's like logistical,
like it's going to take onesecond.
We're gonna be like okay, we'remeeting here.
Okay, fine, we're done Likewe're not like recapping our

(29:28):
week or talking about, like ourlives at seven 30 in the morning
.
I don't have anyone that's evenavailable at that time.
But there she's having theselike oh, my God, let's solve
this problem.
Are they in a different timezone?
Are they in Europe?
What is going?

Speaker 2 (29:41):
on Maybe.

Speaker 1 (29:42):
Maybe I hope they are , because that makes more sense
at 1.30 in the afternoon.

Speaker 2 (29:46):
I imagine this woman is talking to her close friend
who's walking in a differentpart of the country and that
they wish they could be together.
Um, but they live in differentparts of the country.
Now I create whole stories forpeople.

Speaker 1 (29:57):
I just want to say we put it off for like 30 minutes
or at least when she's likewalking around my house.
If she could just be like, holdon pause, this guy hates this
anyway.
Um, got sidetracked, but yes,uh, it is interesting.
There was just a post the otherday about where you get
creative ideas and like mine arelike the shower no device.
Walking the dog no devicerunning which I run, device free

(30:18):
, and then driving with no, withnothing on.
Uh, no audio or anything.
Those are probably my main,like four and it's they're all.
The common denominator is Idon't.

Speaker 2 (30:28):
I'm not on my phone or my computer I have those
moments too, and then I havefound, when I have, when I'm
reading a book or um, usuallypodcasts inspire me.
Okay, like, not in the way oflike it sparks something else I
was thinking about.

Speaker 1 (30:47):
Yeah, okay, like amplifies it.

Speaker 2 (30:49):
Yes, yes, because I think there's been a couple of
your episodes that I've actuallybeen like wait a second pause,
take out the voice recorder, dothe thing.
Yeah, no, that's happened.

Speaker 1 (31:00):
Nice.
I like to hear that.

Speaker 2 (31:02):
Yeah, that's interesting, yeah.

Speaker 1 (31:04):
So you have it, and then you hear someone else say
it and then it almost likereinforces it, like oh yeah, I
was on the right, I was ontosomething there or I could do it
this way, or it's like aslightly different, so that's a
good idea, but it is and we needthat, especially as, like
creatives and running a businessand needing that kind of energy
, like you need times to havethat breathing space, like you

(31:26):
can't just be on all the time,you can't be working all the
time, you can't be messaging allthe time, you can't be writing
all the time, like at some itbecomes exhaustive and you just
end up burning out and then it'sjust hard to come up with ideas
.

Speaker 2 (31:37):
Yeah, and then, what are you really writing about?
Because, truly, so much of whatI write about is my life.
So if I'm not, like today, Iwrote about a documentary I saw
your buddy, aaron Rodgers.
My buddy, aaron Rodgers.
Yeah, enigma, and it was.
Had I not sat down on the couchfor a solid I mean, that is
work.
I sat down on that couch forthree solid hours to watch that

(32:00):
documentary.
I put in that work, no, but Ineeded that.
I needed that time, and it wasa time that I wanted to immerse
myself in something that wasn't,you know, my coaching or my
work in any way, and it sparkedso much curiosity about other
things that when I then steppedback from it, I was like, oh,
actually, this does relate towhat I do because, well, it's my

(32:22):
life.

Speaker 1 (32:23):
Yeah, well, you were holding out on that picture that
you had taken with him.
So you know, you went with likethe screenshot of the
documentary.
And then I ask one question.
You're like oh, here's myRolodex of my 50.
He and I are buddies.
I've been hanging out with himfor four years and I was just
going to keep that low, butsince you mentioned it, we're
like best friends.
So, yeah, you held back just alittle bit.

Speaker 2 (32:46):
I did not mean to bury the lead and first of all,
it wasn't even the lead, but Ilegit I'm not kidding you I
thought, oh, I could use thatpicture.
Completely forgot about it,completely forgot about it.
And then I was like, oh crap, Ido have a picture of him and I
from back in the day.
We both look so young and spry.

(33:06):
So I was like, well, when am Iever going to post about Aaron
Rodgers again?
I'm not.
That's not the coach I am.
That's not even my demographic.
So I had to throw it in therebecause I knew you, of all
people, would appreciate it.
I would, I do.
What was he like in person?
He was exactly like how youhonestly see in the documentary

(33:28):
and again, plug for thedocumentary this he is guarded
and kind.
You can tell he's someone who'sgrappling with things.
I mean, this is like 2011.

(33:52):
He's always thinking.
He's up here and he's thinkingabout things, and so I think
he's someone who thinks deeplyand I think he, based on what I
observed, very much struggledwith this balance of celebrity
that came with the thing that hedid really well, and not that
he didn't enjoy part of it, buthe definitely struggled with a

(34:13):
lot that came with it as aresult, yeah, that's a good
point.

Speaker 1 (34:16):
I mean he comes across as a very smart guy.
I mean he went to Cal andobviously is kind of known for
being a little different thanlike your standard athlete,
right, Just from a cerebralstandpoint and some of the some
of the things he's talked about,which is whatever, but that's
kind of especially.
I feel like these last severalyears has kind of been like his

(34:37):
thing.
I think that he should signwith the Vikings and then
completely follow the BrettFavre path, because they've
literally had the exact samecareer almost identical,
including going to the Jets fortwo years, which is hilarious,
Like of all the teams that you'dend up in New York, and then
they both were terrible.
And then Favre had that onegreat year with the Vikings
where they almost went to theSuper Bowl.

(34:57):
So I think that he should callup Minnesota and be like listen,
you're not going to pay SamDarnold McCarthy's four years
away from being any good.
Your team's ready to win.
Now I've got one more year,let's just go all in.
It worked with Favre.
It's 16 years later.
Let's just do it.
One-year contract, Like, let'sjust make it work.
That's what I'm rooting for.

Speaker 2 (35:18):
But did it work with Favre?
Let's be honest, it didn't workwith Favre.

Speaker 1 (35:22):
They almost went to the Super Bowl.

Speaker 2 (35:24):
Yeah, but almost does not.
They went to the trophy.

Speaker 1 (35:27):
They went to overtime in New Orleans.

Speaker 2 (35:29):
I know and you want want to know how I know this.
It was on my birthday.
He threw that interception andI have replayed that radio call
from k fan radio in minneapolis,minnesota.
Gosh, if there's any vikingsfans listening, they're gonna
absolutely hate me.
They're gonna be like neverworking with this woman.
Yeah no, I remember that call.
It happened on my birthday andI was like that was the most

(35:50):
brett farvey's thing that couldpossibly happen.
So, yeah, that would be, thatwould come.
That would make a full circlemoment, if, if rogers um anyway.

Speaker 1 (36:02):
So now were you always a sports fan.
Did you grow up a sports fan?

Speaker 2 (36:06):
yeah, yeah, no, I grew up uh, my dad is a massive
baseball, baseball fan, baseballhistorian, baseball aficionado.
Um, I grew up I was the onlygirl on my little league team.
Um, I loved it.
When they're like you're notgonna let a girl strike you out,
I was like hell, yeah, I'mgonna strike you out.
Um, always very competitive.

(36:26):
Grew up going to county stadium.
We had a season ticket package.
So, like my youth, like so manytimes, I snow pants at the at
the ball game, because it was,you know, the old stadium didn't
have a a roof.
And so, uh, my and one of myfirst early memories of like
sitting down and like watchingsports I mean the super bowl
would fall on my birthday backin the day when there was like

(36:47):
that break.
So we'd have huge super bowlparties and I always thought
like, look how many people thatcame over for for me when I was
really young, for me, because wewould sing.
They would sing um happybirthday.
I think it was halftime, um,and then, but the first real
memory I have of like sittingdown and watching sports with my

(37:08):
dad was the 86 world serieswhen the Mets won, and that's
when I was like in my heyday oflike little league and so, like
every player on that team, I was, like you know, mookie Wilson
and Daryl Strawberry and DwightGooden and Lenny Dykstra and all
those guys like that was theultimate, that, like I had
followed this team and they wonthe world series and I was

(37:29):
hooked for life.

Speaker 1 (37:30):
That's awesome.
I love that Mets team.
They were one of my favorites.

Speaker 2 (37:33):
They weren't each other's favorite, but I used to
try to.

Speaker 1 (37:38):
I was playing Little League at the time and I would
try to I'd pattern my windupafter Dwight Gooden.
I was left-handed so I couldn'tquite do it the right way, but
yeah, I loved that team.
Um, yeah, that's fun.
I grew up, so I grew up justsouth of cincinnati, and so we
grew up going to reds games andgames.
Um, I was actually inriverfront stadium the night

(38:00):
pete rose, uh, broke ty cobb'srecord.
My mom somehow took me.
I don't know how she gottickets.
We were on the very top row.
We could.
There were no seats above us.
Um, everyone looked like littlemini pigs down on the field and
um, yeah, and he broke therecord.

Speaker 2 (38:16):
So what did it mean to you to be in the stadium for
that?

Speaker 1 (38:19):
I don't think I was old enough.
I was nine, uh, I just turnednine, so I don't think I.
I mean I knew it was a big dealbecause it did.
You know, they've been talkingabout it for so long and they
were trying to figure out, youknow, when he was going to do it
, but I don't think I was oldenough to really truly
appreciate, like, just what itmeans to get almost 4,200 hits
and how long you have to playand how good you have to be to
do it.

(38:39):
It was just like I don't know.
But yeah, that's one of my kindof core memories, um, that she
took me to that.
So they were always just mywhole family were huge sports
fans.
They're big Kentucky Wildcats,like basketball fans and like
the Reds.
Andengals were, like, always abig deal and so, no, the cults
were a non-factor.

(39:00):
No one, no one, even I don't.
No one rooted for the colts.
It was always the bengals, eventhough they were terrible.
Well, they were good in theearly 80s, so they were good for
a brief stretch there, but thenthey're not, are you basketball
?
no, all kentucky basketball,because lexington was about an
hour from us, okay, um, and so Inever had an accent, so I was,

(39:22):
I mean, I was 15 minutes fromcincinnati, so like really
literally right across thebridge oh, sure, okay so in fact
, when I used to travel, I wouldsay like northern kentucky, and
no one would do what I wouldtalk about when I say kentucky.
They were like, where's youraccent?
I was like I don't have one,I'm too far north.
And then they would startarguing with me and I was like,
how about cincinnati?
And they're like, oh yeah, okay.
So then I just started sayingcincinnati.

(39:42):
Then nobody.
I didn't get any more grief.
Everybody has an accent, right,like we don't all talk the same
.
Come on, um anyway.
So yeah, so we just up.
What's funny is, as a kid, Ijust like to be difficult.
So I just started rootingagainst all the teams my family
loved.
So I rooted against Kentuckybasketball and the Bengals and
the Reds as a kid, just simplybecause it made my family mad.

(40:05):
So I was that kid, so I wouldroot for the other teams.
I get so mad.
I finally came back around onthe Bengals and Reds.
I never came back around onKentucky, man, I finally came
back around on the Bengals andReds.
I never came back around onKentucky.
I don't root for Kentuckybasketball, but anyway, yeah.

Speaker 2 (40:19):
Do you have a college team you cheer for?

Speaker 1 (40:26):
Nah, mostly against.
I'm an anti.
I like to root against certaincollege teams Duke basketball,
ohio State football, kentuckybasketball I just find it fun to
root against them.
It doesn't.
When I was younger I cared more.
Like as you get older, andespecially once you have kids,
you're like okay, it's not, itdoesn't really matter, just
entertainment.
Um like, at the end of the day,like ohio state wins the
national championship, itliterally doesn't affect my life
at all.
So I didn't want to happen, butlike they did, so okay, who

(40:48):
cares?

Speaker 2 (40:49):
you know it's funny, you mentioned that that's.
That was the, I think, the themost interesting part of working
in professional sports.
My husband is a die hard notredame football, iu basketball guy
because he is from muncie,indiana, okay, um, so ball state
, right, also a cincinnati redsguy, and he would.
You would think that there wasa lot on the line every I

(41:12):
basketball game and I was like Ididn't understand it.
Plus, having come fromprofessional sports, where
literally the team, whether theydo well or not well, directly
impacts my bottom line, directlyimpacts my ability to earn more
money, I was like that you wantto talk about getting upset
about games, like I could havegone there and I still didn't

(41:34):
because I'm like I can't controlit.
Right, I can't control it, soputting my energy there doesn't
make sense no, I was the sameway.

Speaker 1 (41:43):
I was like your husband for a while, like I
would get really, like it wouldmatter to me.
And then at some point I thinkit was really once I had kids
where you're like, okay, itdoesn't, it's just a game, it's
yes, you want your team to win,you want them to play well.
Like Notre Dame, you wantedthem to play well.
They had a great season.
They fell a little short, butit's like well, it gets into the

(42:05):
results.
We live in a results-orientedsociety, right, grades and sales
and winning and losing insports, and we forget sometimes
that, like you said, sometimesthe other team's just better,
like it doesn't really matter.
Like ohio state was just betterthan another day.
Like if they play that game 10times, ohio state's probably
gonna win eight, like they justwere better and that's.
There's nothing like wrong withthat you just tip your cap, so

(42:27):
um and that and that.
So it's like there's no fault,it's just.
That's just the thing.
Next year it could be different, um, and that's why I tell my
kids when they're playing,because they're always like
winning and losing and I'm like,yeah, I mean obviously there's
a scoreboard and like it feelsbetter to win.
But especially as a kid likeyou're, you're learning lessons.
You're learning how to besocial, you're learning teamwork
, you're learning how to acceptcoaching.
Some coaches are you like.

(42:48):
Some coaches don't no differentthan a manager at a job, right,
like there's personalities andthere's fitting together.
There's all these lessons.
So I try to get them to focuson like enjoying the process and
the journey.
And yes, of course you want totry to win, you want to give
your best effort, but at the endof the day, you could play
great and lose.
It's like all right, I'd rathersee you do that than play
terrible and win.

Speaker 2 (43:15):
Because if you play terrible Like, that's not a good
, it's just not a good recipefor like advancing in life.
Greatest all time teachingquestion you can ask is you know
, what did you learn aboutyourself?
So it doesn't matter, win, lose, like, what did you walk away
with?
What did you learn?
You can lean into that, thoselessons, like you said, focusing
on the things that they cancontrol, which is themselves.

Speaker 1 (43:32):
Yeah, right, yeah, your attitude.
That's what I tell.
Like your attitude, your effort, how you treat people, that's
all.
That's always all within yourcontrol.
What?
Your coach does what the otherteam does, what the the referees
like drives me crazy,especially these days like the
parents complaining about theofficials.
It's like you know that refereedid not get up today and be
like you know what'm going tofleece this fifth grade rec

(43:53):
basketball team.
This team's going down today.

Speaker 2 (43:57):
I'm going to ruin these kids.

Speaker 1 (43:59):
Yeah, this 10-year-old team.
I don't like the color of theirjersey, so I'm going to call
everything.
They're getting paid $25 anhour.
They don't care, so move on.
It's supposed to be fun andthey're every call.
Call.
I traveled, of course hetraveled.
He's 10.
They all travel.
If they called every travel,there'd be no game, it'd just be

(44:20):
75 traveling violations and thescore would be two to nothing.
You know what you complainabout?
That too.
You'd be like oh, you calledtoo much, can't win, so just
leave.

Speaker 2 (44:36):
So yeah, sports so I'll tell you my Dave Matthews
story.
Wait, you have a Dave Matthewsstory.
I do I.

Speaker 1 (44:40):
I my first.
So my first ever concert wasHuey Lewis and the News in 1986.
And then I don't think I wentto one for like 12 years.
And so I saw Pearl Jam in thesummer of 98, just outside of
Cleveland, and I liked.
I just naturally gravitatedtowards more like rock, like
music.
I love Metallica, the BlackAlbum in high school and Van

(45:03):
Halen and ACDC and like all theclassic rock stuff.
That's just what I liked.
And then Pearl Jam, like Grungeand all that.
So I went to Pearl Jam but thatwas really like the first true
concert I'd seen.
They played for two hours.
It's pretty fast paced, it'snot super heavy, but whatever.
So the next summer, which hadbeen summer of 99, I went.
I guess it was a date, I don'tknow.

(45:31):
It was in columbus, ohio.
Uh, just david issue.
Now I didn't know much aboutdave matthews.
I mean, I knew some of theradio songs but, like I, I
wasn't familiar with him or hisconcerts or anything.
Right so I went expecting it tobe just like pearl jam.
So we get there and we're inthe lawn, and then they played,
and then they took, like I feltlike a 20 minute break in
between songs.
It looked like they were onstage like trying to figure out

(45:53):
the next song.
It was like they had no plan.
They were like, okay, that songwas 15 minutes, what do you
want to play next?
And so there was like thesereally long pauses and I was
like what are they doing?
And so then they'd play anothersong and then that whole thing
repeated.
So so I felt like in two hoursthey played like eight songs and
half the time they were justlike up there talking, whereas
like Pearl Jam was like one song, like just play a song, another

(46:14):
song, like it was just this,like rapid fire music.
And then you talk sometimes, andso I think that's the reason
why I just never I couldn't getin.
So I don't know if that's a jamband thing, I don't know if
that was just the night that Isaw them or what, but I think
that was like the beginning oflike all right, I'm just not.
This doesn't work for me.
So I think that was whathappened.

Speaker 2 (46:31):
That's wild and you know, I, I I can say this from
my experience.
That sounds like it was a thatnight thing.
I don't know what was going onthat night.
Um, they do they.
They love to take people on ajourney, and that's the one
thing that the diehard DaveMatthews band fans will tell you
is that there are no twoconcerts that are identical.
The breaks between songs.

Speaker 1 (46:53):
I've never experienced that and I've
experienced 109 shows maybe I'mmaking it up, maybe they didn't
do it, but I was like tellingmyself that I was doing it.
I don't know maybe it felt thatway because the songs okay my
wife's a big jam band band soshe loves fish in the dead.
Not that Dave Matthews is likethem, but it's similar.
Where the songs can just youknow they can play that longer

(47:16):
and whatnot.
I've slowly come around on boththose bands, not like I haven't
come all the way around, like Ilike some of it, but I just
like heavier, I just likeheavier music and they just none
of those bands play what Iconsider to be like heavy music.
It's just friendlier, it'slighter, so it's just not my
thing.
But a hundred and nine pairs isa lot.

Speaker 2 (47:37):
So the thing is the real, like jam band fans, they
will not own Dave Matthews bandas part of that category.
So, like, if you're a fish fanor, like you said, dead, like
you don't put dave matthews manin the jam band category.
Um, it's, I think it's reallydifficult to like to put like
them in a category and when Ilook, I don't care, I actually
I've been to a fish show, not myjam.

(47:58):
I've been to a dead show, notmy jam.
Um, I love the foo fighters, Ilove the foo Fighters, I love
the Foo Fighters.
I love, like 90s hip hop.
I mean, I love a lot of genres.
I can't touch country.
No offense to anyone who lovesit.
I just I can't, I can't.
I've tried, I can't.
But the thing about the DaveMatthews band is that over the

(48:21):
course of the 30 plus years isthat he writes lyrics like
nobody writes lyrics.
And if there's one thing I'velearned about myself and that
clearly you'll probably tellfrom my content, is that words
to me, like I pay attention tothe words in such a way and they
strike me and they create theenergy right, they create this
energy and the way that DaveMatthews puts words together and

(48:45):
the lyrics that he creates areso powerful.
They literally are thesoundtrack of my life.
From the first concert I wentto see him in summer of was it
1996, was my first show through,saw him last summer and just
I'm coming your way this summer.
That's what you said, I'm coming, I'm coming, maybe I should go,

(49:07):
that's what you said.

Speaker 1 (49:08):
I'm coming, I'm coming.
Maybe I should go again and see.
All these years later It'll bea completely different
experience.
So the problem, though, is Idon't know enough of his music.
And I feel like, if you don'tknow a band's music, then it
just doesn't work.

Speaker 2 (49:23):
We'll get you there.
I'll get you set with a littlemix.

Speaker 1 (49:30):
We'll get you schooled'll get you.
I'll look, I'll get you setwith a little mix.
We'll get you.
We'll get you schooled up,ready to go.
I think I jokingly said to youin the dms that I only like his
songs to talk about.
Uh two either has to have tosay or what in the title.

Speaker 2 (49:36):
I think I like those songs okay, well, I can hit
quite a few.
I can hit quite a few with thatcan you?

Speaker 1 (49:41):
so you've been to 109 .
Can you, without looking themup, can you name all of them off
the top of your head withenough time?

Speaker 2 (49:46):
No, absolutely not.
I can tell you all thedifferent states and places.
I've seen them.
I can tell you some iconicshows, but I couldn't name all
of them.

Speaker 1 (49:56):
I've only seen 15 Pearl Jam, so you're making me
realize I'm a small timer.

Speaker 2 (50:02):
No, that's a solid number.
I'm a freak, I'm not.
This is not normal and Iunderstand this and what's?

Speaker 1 (50:08):
interesting is I took my oldest to see Pearl Jam this
past summer here locally and Ithink their last good album was
yield, which is 98.
So all of their albums sinceare just not very good and
there's like to me there's liketwo or three good songs and the
rest of it's like don't everplay it again.
But Eddie is so tied to the newmusic that this last show they

(50:35):
played seven new songs, so Iplayed 24 and so I'm like that's
a bad ratio.
And what's interesting is I'dseen creed two months before and
I was never really a creed fanbecause I felt like they were
pearl jam knockoffs.
But I've come around on thembecause I was like, well, why
should I knock them?
Because they just copied asound that worked.
So really they were workingsmarter, not harder, and they
played 15 songs and all 15 werethe hits.
It was a significantly bettershow.

(50:56):
It was way more entertainingbecause everyone knew every song
, everyone knew all the words,so it was much more communal,
whereas Eddie's up there bangingout you know the ninth track on
the new album that literally 1%of the crowd is even listened
to, and it's dead.
The whole place is dead.
Then they play Evenflow andit's like, oh, it's great.
Right back to another new song,nobody knows.

(51:17):
And so we just like did thisroller coaster and I was like I
get it, Like as an artist, likeyou don't want to just keep
playing the same stuff and I'mnot saying like never play
something new but the rationeeds to be like much better.

Speaker 2 (51:28):
And so I was like I don't know if I'm gonna pay to
see these guys I might I mightbe retired it's a choice and
that's why I said I'll get youschooled up, because I would say
a vast majority of the fans atthe dave shows and maybe I'm a
little wrong on the majority,because I'm one of them is we
want to hear the deep tracks, wedon't want to hear the radio
heads, we don't want to hearthis, we don't want to hear
satellite for the 407 millionthtime and they do a good job of

(51:53):
incorporating.
But if you get schooled up andespecially if you come to like
two nights like they do they dolike usually two nights in a
location because they sellthrough it's a completely unique
experience every night andusually one night tends to be
more like radio friendly and onenight is a little bit more for
the diehards.

Speaker 1 (52:15):
I mean it's weird, right.
Music is people want to hearthe hits Comedians.
You never want to hear an oldjoke, so you always want new
stuff from your comedians andyou want the old stuff from your
bands.
It's really interesting.

Speaker 2 (52:24):
Huh, I never thought of it that way and you want the
old stuff from your bands.
It's really interesting Huh.

Speaker 1 (52:27):
I never thought of it that way.
I got into Foo Fighters duringCOVID.
I was not a huge Foo Fightersfan and I think the reason is I
hated the song Big Me.
So when they released Big Me in95, I was like this song sucks,
so the Foo Fighters suck, so Iput them on hiatus for 25 years.

Speaker 2 (52:40):
You put them in timeout.
Man, that's a penalty box tripand a half.
Yeah, I uh two and a halfdecades.
I was a huge nirvana fan, soright, so like in the 90s, you
were either pearl jam or nirvana.
I was nirvana, and so obviously, dave girl coming out of
nirvana like foo fighters is anatural fit for me, and I've
been a huge fan um ever since,and I recently went and saw the

(53:04):
music of nirvana played by astring quartet.
I recently went and saw themusic of Nirvana played by a
string quartet candlelight inlike this old historic church on
Marquette's campus.
It was beautiful.

Speaker 1 (53:13):
Yeah, super cool.
No, that's really cool.
I mean what I didn't realizeabout Foo Fighters, because
obviously I stopped after.
I don't know what that album iscalled.

Speaker 2 (53:22):
Big B, that was it, you were done, that was.

Speaker 1 (53:25):
Yeah, I was, but then they've got some pretty heavy
stuff so I was like oh, like, I,like dave really.
He switched gears on me and hejust didn't tell me, um, but
they got some pretty, prettyheavy stuff.
So I've tried to see him acouple times.
My oldest son likes them too.
Basically, they listen to rockin my car and they hit listen to
new music in my wife's car, sothey get a good mix, um, but
it's, we've never been able toline up like our schedules just

(53:46):
hasn't quite worked out.
And now that he's, I don't knowif they've broken up, but I
think they've got a lot of stuffgoing on, with the drummer
dying and he's had a new kidwith not his wife, and so
they've got, they got stuffgoing on um so recently I just
learned that you're a tattooaficionado and you have seven
and counting, which meansthere's gonna be at least eight,
yeah, yeah, there's going to bemore.

(54:07):
Yeah, when did you get yourfirst one?
And what's that process like?

Speaker 2 (54:10):
Well, first one I got was, I don't know, barely 18.
So maybe it was a significant18.
But all my tattoos meansomething.
So my first tattoo was for myreally close friend, alexandra,
who died of a brain tumor rightafter we graduated high school.
So I have a black son with thelowercase letter A on my lower

(54:32):
back for her.
And that was how it all started, started with the one and got
some words, but they're mostlylike on my back and arms, and
now I got stuff for my daughter,but a lot of it is.
They all have deep meaning tome.
So if I'm going to have anythinginked on my body, it's gonna.

(54:53):
It's gonna have to meansomething.
So that's why I'm like sevenand counting I don't know what
eight is going to be because Ihaven't found that thing that I
feel so compelled I need topermanently attach it to my body
.
But I love that it's becomemore, I would say, mainstream,
like acceptable, like the factthat people have like my husband
has a full sleeve and all kindslike he's a business owner, so

(55:17):
he never had to worry aboutcorporate America and what that
would look like.

Speaker 1 (55:19):
It's actually, I think, almost swung the other
way, where I feel like 20 or 30years ago you somewhat stood out
if you had them, excuse me.
Now I feel like it's theopposite, like if you don't have
any.
I feel like that's now more oddbecause they have become so
popular.

Speaker 2 (55:39):
Here's a hot take Smoking and tattoos.
Switched Back in the day.
Growing up, you were cool ifyou smoked.
Everybody smoked.
Now it's like nobody.
I can count on one hand howmany people I know smoke
cigarettes.
Yeah, and it doesn't even fillthe hand yeah, yeah, but
everybody has ink but everyonehas ink except me and, honestly,

(56:00):
the the.
If you don't have a tattoo,what do they say?
By the time you're I think, Ithink it's 40 the likelihood of
you ever getting a tattoo islike minuscule You'll likely
never.

Speaker 1 (56:11):
Yeah, the odds of me doing it then are basically zero
, I guess.
Yeah, I don't know I've lookedat it a couple of times but I've
never been able to, really justhaven't fully committed.

Speaker 2 (56:21):
It's a it's a full on commitment.

Speaker 1 (56:23):
Let me ask you this about the back tattoo.
So you what, if you want to seeit?

Speaker 2 (56:29):
do you get like a mirror?
Um, it's not really so much forme to see is that I know it's
there okay, so you, it's like,it's like it's presence yeah,
yeah.
Plus I mean when I first, I'llbe honest, when I first started
getting them like I was young,running around I was like tank
tops and bathing suits, everyonewas seeing them Right.
Plus, I also was veryconscientious.

(56:50):
This is like the you know, latenineties, early two thousands I
wasn't like, well, I don't know, like you get a tattoo here,
it'll ruin your career forever.

Speaker 1 (56:59):
Can't go to a job interview and have that, you
know, sneaking out of the sleeve.

Speaker 2 (57:04):
I mean I literally so my nose ring.
I took out my nose ring incollege and like it was like.
I remember having bosses tellme like, oh yeah, no, it's good
that you don't have that.
You know, now I actually had awoman tell me when I hopped on a
discovery call with her becauseshe was a referral, she felt so

(57:24):
comfortable because she's likeoh, I also, I see, I didn't know
what a career coach would be ifit'd be really like this stuffy
situation.
She's like I have a nose ringtoo.

Speaker 1 (57:33):
I feel I feel better yeah I mean yeah well yeah, it's
definitely changed now withjust personal expression and you
know it's just.
Yeah, it's, it's just, it's allswitched.
So I don't think it's, I don'tthink people, even honestly.

Speaker 2 (57:48):
As grunge kids.
We grew up right.

Speaker 1 (57:50):
Yeah, yeah, we did Um so.

Speaker 2 (57:54):
I still rock my Doc Martin.
So there's that.

Speaker 1 (57:58):
I haven't worn Docs in a while.
I have a great story but Ican't tell.
I cannot tell on the podcast.
But uh, next time you're inMuncie and we get together,
remind me to tell you.
And the only reason I rememberis because I was wearing Doc
Martens on the night it happened.
But it's a good story, I'lltell you Doc Martens story noted
well, this hour went by superquickly, which I knew it would

(58:18):
sorry, am I allowed to say that?
you can say whatever you want.
I think my mom listened to thefirst two episodes and then
she's out, so we mom, I don'twant to offend mom, no not that
she doesn't know that I mightsay fuck um or a lot, depending

(58:39):
on the situation, but anyway, so, yeah, so this is great.
I mean I, I love, like I said,I love your story story, I love
your energy.
Thanks so much for coming on umI'll let you finish it up.
You can any final thoughts orwhat you want to leave the
audience with.
We could talk for a lot longer,but we'll we'll stop here.
Um, and then how people reachyou, I'll put it in the show

(58:59):
notes uh, your linkedin profile,if you have a website, which I
should probably know if you door not, but I don't, but if you
do'll put that in there.
But just how people can reachyou and, yeah, just kind of
anything you want to leave themwith.

Speaker 2 (59:10):
Yeah, I would say this I've shared on LinkedIn.
If you follow me on LinkedInand thanks for like posting the
show notes, that's the best wayto find me.
I put out content five days aweek there.
I don't.
Currently I'm revamping what awebsite would look like based on
what I'm doing and what I'mbuilding out, and right now I've
doubled down and I'm focusedsolely on one-on-one coaching,
why it delivers the best resultsand it's the thing I love the

(59:33):
most.
So I am someone I have runonline communities, I've had
online courses, I've done groupcoaching.
I've done all the things and Iam doubling, tripling,
quadrupling down on the thingthat I know moves the needle the
most.
As a result, I book up prettyquick, I am booked out.
I'm only I'm starting to takefolks for starting in March.
I only accept so many newclients every month and so

(01:00:03):
finding me there, or Kristen, atInicioCoachcom is my email
K-R-I-S-T-I-N at I-N-I-C-I-Ocomor coachcom and Inicio Coachicio
, coaching I don't really talkabout like my company name
because it's it's me.
I am the brand, but iniciomeans to begin or to start,
iniciar, and in latin it alsomeans to inspire, and so for a
lot of women, if you'relistening out there and things
feel overwhelming and you feelstuck and you're not sure what's

(01:00:24):
next.
Like taking that first step,taking that first step of action
, if it is to reach out to meand book a hands-free discover
or, you know, no stringsattached discovery call, that's
where it can start.

Speaker 1 (01:00:36):
Nice.
Just quickly follow up on that.
What is the one-to-one Do youhave?
Do you tailor the package Doyou have like?
Is it like a set three monthsor like what do you?
How do you set up theengagement for like how long you
?

Speaker 2 (01:00:47):
initially work with them.
Initially, I would work withsomeone for, I say, roughly
three months.
And does that mean weekly?
Does it mean bi-weekly?
It's a certain number ofsessions.
You get a built-in one for free, based on how the weeks play
out.
Because at one point, I'll behonest, I was meeting women
where they were at and saying,like, well, what have you set
aside for this investment?
Most people like a littlebudget set aside for for

(01:01:09):
coaching that they didn't knowthat they needed, right, and so
trying to meet someone um, interms of their expectations of
we're talking about rewiringthought patterns and changing
behaviors and things that you'vedone a certain way for decades
of your life to think thatthat's going to change in three
or four sessions I'm not goingto lie, I would never promise

(01:01:32):
something like that.
So, yeah, three months is very,very typical.
I have a woman who was workingwith me last year, worked with
me for three months, and now shebooked out an entire calendar
year because she wants to workbiweekly and that's what worked
for her, based on her goals andwhat we determined would be a
best fit for her.

Speaker 1 (01:01:47):
Yeah, I like that Awesome.
Well, thanks so much for comingon.
Truly appreciate you lookingforward to.
We're recording this onFebruary 3rd and this will be
released on March 19th.
So, Kristen, thanks so much forcoming on, and we'll hopefully
do it again down the road.

Speaker 2 (01:02:02):
Absolutely.