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July 23, 2025 19 mins

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Join the Summer Confidence Mini Series and discover how Christian moms can break free from mom guilt when summer doesn't go according to plan! 


Hey Mama!

Is your summer filled with missed trips, cranky kids, and unexpected chaos? Or maybe you're constantly comparing your family's simple summer to the elaborate vacations you see on social media? This faith-centered episode offers compassionate encouragement and biblical perspective for the moments when summer doesn't go according to plan—giving you back the joy that mom guilt has been stealing.

In this episode, we explore how to find peace in the mess and create meaningful moments right where you are—even when plans fall apart or finances feel tight. Discover practical ways to enjoy summer with kids without the pressure of perfection, because summer joy isn't measured by perfect plans or expensive outings, but by faithful presence in the small, sacred moments.

Key takeaways:

  • Transform disappointment into teachable moments that model faith and resilience
  • Try the "$0 Fun Challenge" to create memorable summer experiences with kids. using only what you already have at home
  • Let God redefine "summer success" and break free from mom guilt


Join our supportive community of moms who are choosing presence over perfection this summer season!


Take the summer confidence challenge and share your outfit inside the free online community—linked in the show notes!


Explore more from the Summer Confidence Mini Series:


More FREE Resources:

FREE Community: https://bit.ly/buildingconfidenceforchristianmoms

Become a Restored Mind Insider: https://restoredmindllc.myflodesk.com/insider

Email: Hello@restoredmindllc.com

Work with me
Book your 1:1 call:- https://calendly.com/restoredmind

Ways You Can Give Back:

Leave A Review On Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-restored-mind-faith-building-self-doubt/id1654768629


I'm excited to connect with you! Remember, you can do hard things!
"I can do all things through Him who strengthens me"- Philippians 4:13


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Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
maybe you had big hopes for thesummer and it's just not turning
out the way you pictured formissed trips to cranky kids and
flat out chaos.
You're wondering, did I mess up?
And today's episode of theSummer Confidence Mini series
where we stop the mom guilt andstart showing up as the mom we
want to be.
We're talking about how to letgo of that guilt find peace and

(00:21):
the mess, and create meaningfulmoments right where you are.
Hey, mama.
Tired of the constant guilt andwondering if you're getting it
right.
You are not alone, and you don'thave to stay stuck.
It's time to show up.

(00:41):
Ask the mom you want to be andnot the mom who's always drained
and snapping at her family.
Welcome to the Restored MindPodcast.
I'm your host, Caroline Tao, andthis is your safe space to
trade, constant overwhelm formeaningful connection and guilt
for the precious moments ahead.

(01:02):
Ready?
Let's do this.
Are you loving the show or havea question you want answered on
air?
Well, this is your moment.
Just tap the link at the top ofthe show notes because now you
can send me a message and whoknows?

(01:22):
You might even hear it on air,or if you have a question that's
going to also help shape thefuture of this podcast.
The truth is I truly just lovereading your messages and
hearing from you because itseriously makes my day knowing
that you're part of the restoredMind family.
Now, I won't be able to reply toyour text messages, so if it's
something that you need aresponse to.

(01:44):
Please email me athello@restoredmindllc.com.
That's HELLo@restoredmindllc.com.
Either way, I can't wait to hearfrom you.
If you caught the mini episode Ireleased about two weeks ago,
which would've been episode 124,you probably already know that

(02:07):
our summer started off a littlerocky.
We had planned this great tripto Great Wolf Lodge to kick off
the season with the kids, whichis something that they've been
looking forward to ever sinceour spring break trip to
Yosemite.
The plan was to go the veryfirst week of summer to
celebrate a wonderful schoolyear and a start to the summer

(02:29):
break.
But then my husband had totravel for work, so he was gone
for a full week, and when he gotback, he had to work through the
weekend.
So while he was able to comehome, it just felt like he was
gone, and then by the time threeweeks.
Came around, we just realized wehad not booked it, so we finally
booked our overnight stay forMonday night.

(02:50):
Everyone was honestly excited.
Well, everyone but one person.
I am not a huge fan of waterparks, but I'll take one for the
team.
So as the day was nearing, thekids were getting more excited.
We had also hyped up this trip,and that morning of my kids were
so full of energy, especiallyfrom having a big breakfast.
All of our bags were packed andwe were loading up the car.

(03:12):
Then we set off, and then aroundlunchtime we decided to go to
Chick-fil-A.
And guess what?
Our car died right there in thedrive-through as they handed us
our food.
And you know what?
We brought the entire lunch lineto a halt, which I felt bad
about.
Because I also know theyprobably have kids in the car
and it was probably veryfrustrating.

(03:34):
So if you were in that line, I'mso sorry that you got stuck
behind us.
Eventually though, we did get acar to the shop, but what we
thought would take a couple ofhours actually ended up taking
all day.
So we missed our check-in andour plan was completely derailed
and the disappointment on ourkids' faces.

(03:55):
That was actually the hardestpart.
As we told them, we had to pushour reservation to the next day.
I felt this wave of guiltknowing that we had this planned
as the first week of theirsummer vacation, and then
thinking about how we shouldhave already made this happen,
and it just took us so long toget there.
I felt bad.
I had tried so hard to give themthis awesome, fun start to the

(04:18):
summer and now it felt like Ilet them down.
But here's the thing.
Even when we plan and prepareand hype things up, sometimes
life just doesn't cooperate.
And when it doesn't, it's easyto spiral into that mom guilt.
So if you've ever felt that waywhen your plans fell apart, when

(04:38):
maybe park dates got missed, orwhen screen time creeps in
because you're a little bit busyand so they're on it a little
bit longer, I think we've allbeen guilty of that.
Or when someone's cranky andnothing just feels quote unquote
awesome.
It's just a messy day.
I know that this episode isgoing to be so incredibly
awesome for you.
So.
let's talk about that.

(05:00):
Let's talk about when our plansfall apart, because the thing is
you've planned this awesometrip, maybe to the beach, to the
zoo, a fun day at an interactivemuseum, or even a family getaway
trip.
You've hyped it up and you'vepacked the snacks, the backs,
and got everyone excited, andthen someone gets sick or your

(05:21):
husband has to work or you havecar trouble, maybe someone
missed their nap and the dayjust spirals away from you.
So you start thinking all thateffort.
And for what?
It's frustrating, it almostfeels like all the pre-planning
had become a waste of time, andnow you're left holding that

(05:42):
disappointment and the guilt,which those two things are
absolutely understandablebecause you put in the effort
and you wanted to do somethingfun for your family so that they
can have an awesome summer a.
One that is full of joy andwonderful memories that they can
hold onto.
You want to maximize theopportunity to create more

(06:04):
memories with your family oreven new traditions.
So when things fall through,especially when they're out of
your control, it can feelunfair.
Like all your effort was wastedand suddenly you're wondering if
you failed at giving your kidsthe summer that they deserve,
that somehow you failed tocreate the summer that you have
hoped for.
'cause all you want to do islisten to the laughs that they

(06:28):
give off when they're excitedabout something, or the joy in
their voices when they'retalking about this.
Awesome memory that they'vemade.
When we were stuck at the carshop?
Besides the rising frustrationand annoyance that came with
planning and replanningaccording to what the progress
of the car was.
We could hear the agony and ourkids' voices.

(06:51):
It gave us a chance to talk withour kids about how sometimes, no
matter how well we plan things,life doesn't go the way we
expect because trust me,absolutely nobody wanted to be
stuck at the car shop that day.
But when we remember.
That God is the one ultimatelyin control.

(07:11):
It puts those interruptions intoperspective.
And let's think about this,because it doesn't feel good
when we plan something and ourexpectations aren't met, but
maybe that's because we'remeasuring good and bad days by
our own standards, when inreality God who has created all

(07:32):
of our days sees a biggerpicture.
So even the quote unquote baddays can carry purpose.
And as Lamentations reminds us,his mercies are new every
morning.
So where can we find hismercies?
Mama.
It's when you give yourselfpermission to feel disappointed
alongside your family too.

(07:53):
Now, that doesn't mean that youare being ungrateful.
It's in our human nature to feeldisappointed when things don't
go as planned.
But remember, that moment doesnot define your entire summer.
Also.
Reframe your thoughts and thinkabout what you can do instead.
Sometimes it's those unexpectedmoments that become the sweetest

(08:15):
memories for our little family.
That day, it was an ice creamtrip at a local shop after
dinner, everyone got a littlesweet treat with.
Two toppings instead of theusual one choice of topping,
which they were excited aboutand it didn't fix everything to
be honest with you, but it didcreate a memory to smile about.

(08:36):
It also served as a reminderthat joy doesn't always come
from the original plan.
Now, I know that for some of youlistening, even an ice cream
stop might feel out of reachright now.
Maybe money is tight And it'snot just the unexpected
setbacks, it's that constanttension of wanting to create

(08:57):
something special for your kids,but feeling like you can't
afford to.
So let's talk about that for aminute, because honestly, you're
not alone and you're notfailing.
Mama.
Maybe money is tight this yearfor whatever reason, but you
feel the need or have the desireto do something special, like

(09:19):
take a beach trip or go to thewaterpark.
Even something like going out tograb some ice cream, but an
unexpected bill came in.
Maybe you lost your job, or yourbusiness is growing at a slower
rate than you thought.
Maybe something in the housebroke and it needed fixing.
Or perhaps it could be that yourbudget has already been maxed

(09:42):
out.
Now you're faced with saying noto something you wish you could
say yes to, and the reality isyou're not just disappointed,
you feel helpless.
You want to give your kidssomething to look forward to,
for them to get excited about,and instead you feel like you're
constantly coming up short.

(10:04):
And the reason why you feel thisway is because you love your
kids.
You want them to have fun andyou want them to enjoy the
little things that might maketheir day even sweeter.
You want them to go onadventures, experience something
new, and create new memories.
And when you can't give themthose experiences, even if their
reasons are completely out ofyour control, it honestly hurts.

(10:27):
That's when the lies creep in.
Honestly, it's quite easy tointernalize the idea that says,
if I can't afford this, I'mletting them down, or worse, I
am not doing enough.
As a mom, and you might even befeeling sad because you are

(10:47):
scrolling on social media,seeing other families out and
about, and wondering if you aredoing something wrong.
But let me just say this loudand clear'cause I want you to
truly understand and grasp this.
What you're able to givefinancially does not measure the
love that you give your familydaily.

(11:08):
Remind yourself that you are nota bad mom because you can't buy
experiences.
The most meaningful memoriesyour kids will remember won't be
about the price tags.
It's going to be about thepresence, not the presents, like
the things that you unopen, butyou being fully there and
intentional with them.

(11:28):
This is something that myhusband and I do with our kids
that actually helps bringawareness to the rising prices
that everyone is experiencingright now.
And that is, we're honest withthem about why we can't do
something.
And we make it known that it'snot that we don't want to, but
it's just not in our budgetright now.

(11:49):
And it doesn't make sensefinancially to force this thing
to happen if it's going to giveus a setback in the future.
And it could be also that wehave a bill due, or the budget
just doesn't stretch that farfor this particular event.
Once we have that conversationwith our kids, we will suggest
an alternative or plan furtherin advance to potentially

(12:11):
accommodate, depending on whatthe event is, and you know what,
mama?
There are plenty of affordablealternatives.
It just takes a littlecreativity.
So maybe we can't go to theinteractive museum, but we can
have our own little scienceexperiments at home.
We can make our own bubblerecipe and play with that or

(12:32):
play around with water becausethat's their favorite thing to
do in a way that sparkscuriosity.
If it's a craving that we'rehaving, we'll probably look up a
recipe and see if we have all ofthe ingredients to make it.
And if we don't, we'll thinkabout what we might be able to
use that can substitute oneingredient for another, which
always leads to somethinginteresting.

(12:54):
and in all of this, there arelots of learning opportunities
in these moments and they almostalways end up being a great
time.
One, because we don't have toshare the space.
And two, the kids can play withtheir creation for as long as
they want.
It's simple, but it matters.
And honestly.

(13:14):
This is where I want toencourage you that if you're
feeling stuck or discouragedabout not being able to quote,
go and do.
Just remember.
You can create and connect.
So I have this lightheartedlittle fun challenge for you
this week, and I think it'sgoing to bring some awesome joy
back into your day.
Today I'm calling it the$0 FunChallenge because.

(13:38):
That was the name that I couldthink of that actually
encapsulated the idea for thischallenge.
So your mission is to create onefun or meaningful memory with
your kids that cost nothing,which means you're going to use
what you already have.
So it could be that you aregoing to build a pillow fort

(13:58):
with them or have a dance partyin the living room.
Or maybe you guys go on a naturescavenger hunt if your family
loves to be outdoors.
My daughters this summer havebeen making paper dolls from
leftover birthday and Christmaswrapping paper and they look
incredibly cute.
And my son, he's been buildingobstacle courses out of our

(14:19):
couch pillows and pillows ingeneral and blankets.
And that's also been really fun.
And these are the kind ofmoments that stay with them.
Not because they're fancy, butbecause everyone was present and
interacting and buildingconnection with one another.
So once you've done your funmemory challenge, come share it.

(14:39):
Inside my free community, we'reall gathering ideas to keep
summer light and connected andpressure free.
And listen, if you're nervousabout sharing, you're not alone.
But your simple idea might beexactly what another mama needs
to hear in this season.
Because even if it doesn't feelthe same as the trip that you

(15:00):
had hoped for, it is stillmeaningful.
Creativity, presence andlaughter.
Those are the things that buildconnection and lasting memories.
And honestly, I believe thatyou've got this, mama.
So don't be afraid to take onthis$0 fun challenge.
Now we've talked about what todo when plans fall apart.

(15:21):
We've also talked about what todo when finances feel tight.
But what about what's happeningin your heart through all of
this?
What if success isn't measuredby how much we spend or how much
we do?
What if God is using thesequieter, slower, more simpler
moments to shape something evenmore meaningful?

(15:43):
Let's talk about that.
Let's talk about what it meansto let God redefine what a good
summer or even a successful dayactually looks like.
Just because it didn't go asplanned doesn't mean it wasn't
memorable.
There are many lessons you candraw from, even from the most
unexpected and roughest of daysthat could simply mean slowing

(16:07):
down.
And returning your attention tothe soft cooing of your baby, or
listening to your kids runaround while playing together as
you take a deep breath torelease the tension from the
disappointment and guilt.
You don't need to create magicfor the best summer ever.
It is helpful when you rememberyour creator and count it all.
Joy, as James kindly reminds usin chapter one, verse two, to

(16:31):
not give up when you meet trialsof various kinds because you
know that the testing of yourfaith produces steadfastness and
mama God is present even in thedetours of life.
He works according to his willand those unplanned times.
It helps build resilience in youas you model that for your kids.

(16:55):
To honor God with the glory thathe is.
Even in the moments where lifejust seems so tough is what
helps you break free from momguilt.
It creates space to forgiveyourself, to feel the
disappointment, but not staystuck in it.
It helps you refocus yourattention on what matters most,

(17:15):
Which is the family that you'vebeen gifted with.
Everything else is extra.
Would it be great to have thosethings?
Yeah, sure.
But it doesn't dictate whetheryour summer is a success or a
failure.
You get to have this opportunityto be in conversation with your
kids, to build something new andpersonal with them that will
make a lasting impact in theirlife.

(17:38):
You're partnering with God asyou remain steadfast in him.
So ask yourself, what has Godbeen showing you in this slower
and messier summer?
I want you to remember that whenplans fall apart, it's okay to
feel disappointed, but thatmoment doesn't define your
summer because God can stillmeet you where you're at and you

(18:01):
can still make it meaningful.
We also talked about.
When money feels tight, which iswhat we're all experiencing at
the moment, your presence trulymatters more than any price tag.
Joy can be created with what youalready have.
Creativity and connection go along way, and when it feels like

(18:22):
it's all messy, let God redefinesuccess for you.
Go back to him and remember him.
He's not asking for a flawlesssummer for you to even show up
as the mom who's always planningthese big events and doing
everything on the bucket list ofeveryone in your family.
He's inviting you to stayfaithful in the small, slow and

(18:44):
sacred moments.
So as you head into the rest ofyour day, don't forget, small
simple moments really do matter.
And hey, if you try the$0 Fundchallenge, I would love to hear
about it.
Just pop into the free communityand share your favorite moment.
We're gathering ideas andencouraging one another.
Alright, mama, you've got this.

(19:05):
I know that it can be hard, butyou can do hard things.
Thank you so much for hangingout with me today, mama.
I had a lot of fun.
I'll see you next Wednesday,right here on the podcast, and
my prayer is that you'll show upin all the spaces of your life

(19:28):
ready to serve with a joyfulheart and with confidence.
Until then, go in peace.
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