November 5, 2025 • 19 mins
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Hey Mama!
Feeling the holiday pressure to “make it magical” this year? In this episode, I help you trade perfectionism for peace with purposeful planning and simple holiday traditions that build connection with your family. We’ll talk about overcoming mom guilt during the holidays, creating meaningful holidays with simple, repeatable traditions, and choosing presence over perfection so your family remembers what truly matters.
Key Takeaways:
- Practical framework: Reduce holiday stress and mom guilt
- One “memory anchor”: A simple, repeatable tradition that builds connection
- Setting boundaries: Say "no” to extras to protect your time, budget, and peace
Let’s make room for peace together. Follow the podcast and send this to one mom who needs it.
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FREE Community: Break Free From Mom Guilt
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Email: Hello@restoredmindllc.com
Ways You Can Give Back:
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It's time to become to the mom you want to be. Remember, you can do hard things!
"I can do all things through Him who strengthens me"- Philippians 4:13
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
With the holidays right aroundthe corner, it's easy to fall
into the make it magical trap.
You know the one word pressureto make everything perfect, only
magnifies mom guilt.
So today we're flipping thescript and talking about how to
trade that pressure for peace bymaking the holidays more
meaningful instead of justmagical.
(00:26):
Hey Mama.
Overwhelmed by Mom Guilt.
I'm Caroline Tao, helpingChristian moms trade
perfectionism for freedom andrest.
Welcome to the Restored Mind,where Biblical wisdom meets
practical strategies forbecoming the mom You've always
wanted to be ready.
Let's do this.
(00:52):
before we begin, the RestoredMind's, third birthday is coming
up and I've been working onsomething special to celebrate
with you, a brand new quizdesigned to help you understand
where your mom guild is reallycoming from.
So you can finally break throughMom guilt.
I'll share all the details soon,so stay tuned.
(01:13):
In the meantime, be sure tofollow the show by simply
tapping on that plus button fromwhatever you are listening from.
It is going to not only notifyyou of when a new episode has
launched, but keep you in theknow of what is happening here
at the restored mind.
(01:37):
We are officially in the monthof November, so happy November.
As I'm thinking about the daysahead, my mind for some reason
is just thinking about how fastthe holiday season is going to
be approaching us.
Now, when I think about theholidays, it always brings me
back to my grandparents' home.
(01:59):
It was a time I had alwayslooked forward to as a little
girl, and something aboutspending Thanksgiving and
Christmas with them.
It just felt so magical and foryears I could not figure out
what made it so special.
And the only emotion, or theonly thing that I can really
relate it to is this.
(02:20):
If you could imagine with me forone moment, pulling out fresh
laundry that just.
Came out of the dryer, thatwarmth that you feel is exactly
how I felt as a little girl whenI would go spend the holidays
with my grandparents.
And so as I grew up, I startedmy own family and I really
(02:41):
wanted to recreate that warm,cozy feeling that I remember so
well as a kid.
So I started with thedecorations, trying to make our
home feel festive and inviting.
Then came the menu, And if youknow me, you know, I don't mind
cooking at all.
So I actually find it very funto draw up a menu, uh, for the
(03:04):
holidays.
It's just something that I enjoydoing.
I thought that cooking all ofthe traditional holiday foods
would help capture that magicthat I felt when we would enjoy
holiday meals with mygrandparents.
And then of course, withChristmas.
I went a little overboard,sorry, husband.
(03:26):
I would add more decorations,more gifts, and more effort to
make it all feel so special formy kids.
But over time, that magicalfeelings started to fade and the
pressure to.
Have the perfect decorations toprepare the perfect meal and buy
(03:47):
all of the right gifts.
Slowly started turning intostress.
Instead of feeling joyful, Ifound myself overwhelmed and
honestly even guilty, wonderingif I was doing enough to make
the holiday special for myfamily.
And a little side note here, Ialso felt like I was in
competition with myself to makethis year's holiday.
(04:10):
More special than last year'sholiday, and it just brought on
stress that I did not enjoy, andthen one day it hit me.
The reason my grandparents' homefelt so magical wasn't because
of the decorations or the foodor the gifts.
In fact, I recall a single.
Christmas tree as their holidaydecor.
(04:32):
And if I'm being honest, I thinkthat that Christmas tree would
not have been there if thegrandkids were not all headed to
their house for the season.
But anyway, what made it magicalwas the relationship I had with
them.
It was the smile on their faceswhenever we arrived, and the
tight hugs that I received thatfelt more like a squeeze that
(04:56):
made me feel incredibly welcome.
So wanted and cared for that iswhat made it meaningful, and
that is what gave it thatmagical feeling.
And when that hit me, it changedthe way that I see the holidays.
The magic was never in the decorand the food or the gifts.
(05:18):
It was truly in how much theyput an effort into being present
in our lives really is what madethe holidays magical.
And so that realization shapedhow I wanted to approach the
holidays moving forward.
now I know it's early November,but I also wanted to share it
with you now before the busynessbegins, so that you can start
(05:41):
thinking about what kind ofseason you want to create this
year with your family.
Because when your plans get ledby pressure, the joy gets lost
in the doing.
But when you plan with purpose,there is room for connection,
for peace and presence, whichare the very things that make
the holidays meaningful.
(06:03):
So if you're tired of runningyourself to exhaustion every
single year, trying to makeevery detail perfect.
Here is the first shift I wantto encourage you to make this
year.
I want you to plan with purposeand not pressure.
This is going to be where youdecide what matters most to your
family this season, and I wantyou to also set boundaries to
(06:24):
protect it.
I would even encourage you to.
Give yourself permission to letgo of everything else.
This is where pressure plans andpurposeful planning comes into
play.
because when your plans are ledby pressure, it drains the joy
out of preparing and enjoyingthe holidays, whether it be
making travel plans or juststaying at home plans on how you
(06:48):
are going to be enjoying theholidays this year with your
family.
It pulls us into a distractionand busyness, which is the exact
opposite of what we want,intentional time with our family
and memories that we're actuallygoing to cherish, now this
reminds me of Martha and Mary.
Like Martha, we can get caughtup in doing all the things to
(07:09):
make the holiday magical.
Jesus responds to Martha whenshe wants Mary to help by
saying, Martha.
Martha, you are anxious andtroubled about many things, but
one thing is necessary.
Mary has chosen the goodportion, which will not be taken
away from her, and sometranslations emphasize.
(07:29):
Only one thing is necessary,highlights how important it is
to have our eyes on Jesus as weplan with purpose instead of
letting this pressure run usthroughout the season.
And in Luke chapter eight, verse14, Jesus warns us that when the
word is choked by the cares,riches and pleasures of life, it
(07:53):
does not mature and bear fruit.
So holiday perfectionism worksin the same way.
It chokes what really matters tous.
And here's the thing.
The intentional time you spendwith your kids throughout the
year matters more than theperfectly decorated holidays or
the biggest gifts.
(08:14):
The anticipation and excitementof the season builds on the
relationship that you've alreadynurtured all year,.
Just like my grandparents did.
The magic wasn't in the seasonitself.
It was in the connection thatwas already there.
And that understanding naturallyleads us to the next step.
What can you do to make yourholidays meaningful without
(08:37):
pressure?
So the first thing I want you tothink about and really open
yourself up to is to be open tonew traditions or beginnings,
Because your kids grow and someold ones that you've already
established are going tonaturally fade.
But that doesn't mean that thememories or the connections are
(08:58):
lost, it actually gives you anopportunity to create something
new, which we're gonna talkabout in just a little bit.
And then the second thing I wantyou to do is to simplify your
plans, pick a few meaningfulactivities and plan for those.
For us, the big activities aregoing to see the Christmas
lights and baking Christmascookies.
(09:19):
Now, those are also the onesthat my husband and I will spend
more time planning and budgetingfor, because it does require
some financial means and it alsorequires time for us to be
available for these things.
We also have smaller activities,but those are not complicated
and don't require so much.
So I just work those in betweenthe two big activities that we
(09:42):
typically plan for each year.
And then the third thing I wantyou to keep in mind and to
practice doing is to say no,which can be hard for us because
we want to do everything aroundthe holidays, right?
But saying no to extra stresswhere possible is going to help
you tremendously remove thatpressure of the holidays.
(10:06):
So, for example, that could meanthat you are passing up on
adding new decor to what isalready existing in your
collection.
when you are passing up on thesenew decor, you're actually
saving yourself the stress andthe financial burden of adding
more things that's already intoyour collection.
And then another example issaying, no, to Friendsgiving
(10:30):
this year, or white elephant ifit becomes a financial burden.
And there's nothing wrong withthat.
You can go to one or two, butyou don't have to go to every
single thing that you areinvited to.
That's essentially what I amgetting at here.
So now that we've talked aboutwhat matters, let's dial in even
further with one simple memoryanchor that you can repeat.
(10:54):
And this is what I was talkingabout earlier, about being open
to new beginnings.
see as your kids grow, theirinterest is going to change.
So maybe pumpkin patches are nota thing that you do anymore.
Our kids are in the season wherethey're slowly growing out of
that.
And so that, has slowly phasedout over the years for us, and
(11:15):
it's sad, but I still love thememories that we've had.
Instead, this is going to be anopportunity for us to find
something new to do as a familytogether.
So it doesn't have to becomplicated.
In fact, I want you to keep itsimple so that it can be
repeated throughout the year.
That means this doesn't have tobe Pinterest perfect or
elaborate Don't feel pressure tofigure it out right away of what
(11:39):
this new tradition could be.
It's important to just feel yourway through it.
Maybe this year you trysomething and it wasn't a huge
win for everyone, so that justmeans onto the next, it's not a
fail.
It's actually pretty cool to seeyourself grow through the
seasons with your kids.
But the reason why I want you tokeep it simple is because it is
(12:02):
something that is going tobecome yours as a family.
And so that could just besomething like hot chocolate and
movie night, For us aroundThanksgiving, we used to go to
pumpkin patches, but now thisyear we're probably just gonna
play some games.
And then for Christmas we alwayswatch home Alone, the original
one because it's the best one,and eat little pretzel bites
(12:25):
that I've been making over thepast couple years.
And my kids love helping me putit together too,'cause it's
super easy and simple.
So that's what it looks like forus.
Those are our memory anchors.
And the reason creating thismemory anchor is important is
because it's going to buildconsistency.
And consistency matters.
(12:45):
When your family knows thatthere's this one special thing
that you always do together, itbuilds the anticipation, it
deepens the connection.
Of the relationship and itbrings in that wholesome joy
that you've been wanting tobring into your home for the
holidays.
These repeatable moments becomea memory anchor that your family
(13:08):
is going to remember for years.
They create meaningfulexperiences rooted in presence,
which means the decorations orthe pressure to cook an
elaborate meal are not going tohold you hostage during the
busyness of the season.
So now you know what the impactof a simple, repeatable memory
(13:29):
can have.
You might be wondering How doyou actually create one without
Mom guilt lingering over you?
I would say start small.
This is going to eliminate thepressure for you to add more
onto your plate.
So think about what is somethingthat you can do within your
routine that you've alreadyestablished throughout the year.
(13:51):
Is it a simple movie night?
Perhaps it's taking a strollafter dinner., And you can make
it holiday specific by playing afavorite holiday movie or if
you're going on a stroll playingthe game I Spy where you look
for things specific to thatseason or holiday.
And if your neighbors decoratetheir home, that's gonna be even
(14:12):
more fun.
My kids loved this.
They absolutely loved playing.
I Spy whenever we would take ourevening strolls.
And if your neighbors don'tdecorate their homes for
whatever reason, then this isalso a perfect opportunity for
you to ask questions relating tothe holiday.
So if it's Thanksgiving, youknow, asking them what they are
(14:35):
thankful for.
And if it's Christmas, then askthe question why do they believe
Jesus was born?
And it's not about who's rightor wrong, But this does give you
an opportunity to steward faithin them even more.
And the second thing is inviteparticipation.
Let your kids collaborate withyou, so if your tradition
(14:55):
involves baking.
Or any type of treats, let themhave their own batch and make it
fun and memorable and you know,it's no extra stress for you
because they're technicallyplanning the activities that
they want to do.
And then the third thing is tolet go of the picture.
Perfect.
And what I mean by this is.
(15:16):
There is this idea that you haveto get the most candid holiday
shot or the most perfect holidayphoto, And to do that can be
stressful.
I'm talking about no mess in thehome, no spilled flour from
baking or toys on the floor.
That honestly is nearlyimpossible, at least in my
(15:38):
house, and it's only realisticin a styled shoot.
Now I have taken my familypictures the last two or three
years.
I'm not a professional by anymeans, but I will tell you there
is always a section that looksclean while everything else is a
hot mess, and this is exactlyhow it's played out in my house.
(15:59):
I'll look at the camera screenand I'll ask my kids to move
their books, their toys orclothes out of the shot, and.
What you get is this holidaypicture that looks incredibly
festive, but in real life,everything outside of that shot
looks like a hot mess because inreal life, my house is not
(16:21):
always perfectly tidy.
And you know what?
That's okay.
Now, I'm not saying not to takethe photos.
I want you to take as manypictures as you want, but I want
you to remove that pressure thatyou put on yourself to keep your
house spotless while trying toenjoy the moment, and that is
going to make a huge differencebecause as your kids get older
(16:45):
and they look back on thosepictures, they're not going to.
Look at the toys that were allover the floor.
They're going to see andremember certain moments, in
that time that you've captured,and it's such a beautiful thing.
My kids love going back andlooking at past photos and
talking about memories thatstuck out to them, And it always
(17:05):
feels good, and I want that foryou too.
So let's recap what we talkedabout today, which is to plan
with purpose and not pressure.
This is where you decide whattruly matters most to your
family this season.
And of course, I want you togive yourself permission to let
go of everything else.
As Luke eight four reminds usthat the cares and pressures of
(17:26):
life can choke what reallymatters.
So choose purpose that protectsthe joy and presence that we
want to nurture this holidayseason.
So pick one simple memory anchorthat your family can look
forward to.
Keep it simple and involve yourkids.
And of course, let go of theneed for perfect decorations or
(17:47):
perfectly staged photos.
The imperfectness of your lifeare going to be what sticks with
your family for years to come.
At the end of the day, it's notabout magical Pinterest holidays
or doing all the things.
It's about showing up, beingpresent, and making intentional
choices that reflect what trulymatters.
(18:10):
That's what makes the holidaysmeaningful.
So just a heads up, the restoredmind will be slowing down this
month with biweekly episodesinstead of the usual weekly
episodes.
That way I can spend moreintentional time with my own
family this holiday season.
And you'll have more space toput these ideas into practice
(18:30):
with yours as well as being moreintentional with them.
And that is truly the reason whythe restored mind is slowing
down this holiday season.
So be sure to join the onlinecommunity.
The link is in the show notesfor any daily encouragement and
a peek behind the scenes ofwhat's coming up next.
Until next time, keep showingup.
(18:51):
Being present and becoming themom you want to be.
And when things get hard, mama,just remember you can do hard
things.
Thanks for hanging out with metoday, mama.
If this episode helped you inany way, would you do me a favor
(19:13):
and please share it with afellow mom that could also
benefit from this episode.
Until then, I'll see you nextWednesday, right here on this
podcast.
Go in peace.
With the holidays right aroundthe corner, it's easy to fall
into the make it magical trap.
You know the one word pressureto make everything perfect, only
magnifies mom guilt.
So today we're flipping thescript and talking about how to
trade that pressure for peace bymaking the holidays more
meaningful instead of justmagical.
(00:26):
Hey Mama.
Overwhelmed by Mom Guilt.
I'm Caroline Tao, helpingChristian moms trade
perfectionism for freedom andrest.
Welcome to the Restored Mind,where Biblical wisdom meets
practical strategies forbecoming the mom You've always
wanted to be ready.
Let's do this.
(00:52):
before we begin, the RestoredMind's, third birthday is coming
up and I've been working onsomething special to celebrate
with you, a brand new quizdesigned to help you understand
where your mom guild is reallycoming from.
So you can finally break throughMom guilt.
I'll share all the details soon,so stay tuned.
(01:13):
In the meantime, be sure tofollow the show by simply
tapping on that plus button fromwhatever you are listening from.
It is going to not only notifyyou of when a new episode has
launched, but keep you in theknow of what is happening here
at the restored mind.
(01:37):
We are officially in the monthof November, so happy November.
As I'm thinking about the daysahead, my mind for some reason
is just thinking about how fastthe holiday season is going to
be approaching us.
Now, when I think about theholidays, it always brings me
back to my grandparents' home.
(01:59):
It was a time I had alwayslooked forward to as a little
girl, and something aboutspending Thanksgiving and
Christmas with them.
It just felt so magical and foryears I could not figure out
what made it so special.
And the only emotion, or theonly thing that I can really
relate it to is this.
(02:20):
If you could imagine with me forone moment, pulling out fresh
laundry that just.
Came out of the dryer, thatwarmth that you feel is exactly
how I felt as a little girl whenI would go spend the holidays
with my grandparents.
And so as I grew up, I startedmy own family and I really
(02:41):
wanted to recreate that warm,cozy feeling that I remember so
well as a kid.
So I started with thedecorations, trying to make our
home feel festive and inviting.
Then came the menu, And if youknow me, you know, I don't mind
cooking at all.
So I actually find it very funto draw up a menu, uh, for the
(03:04):
holidays.
It's just something that I enjoydoing.
I thought that cooking all ofthe traditional holiday foods
would help capture that magicthat I felt when we would enjoy
holiday meals with mygrandparents.
And then of course, withChristmas.
I went a little overboard,sorry, husband.
(03:26):
I would add more decorations,more gifts, and more effort to
make it all feel so special formy kids.
But over time, that magicalfeelings started to fade and the
pressure to.
Have the perfect decorations toprepare the perfect meal and buy
(03:47):
all of the right gifts.
Slowly started turning intostress.
Instead of feeling joyful, Ifound myself overwhelmed and
honestly even guilty, wonderingif I was doing enough to make
the holiday special for myfamily.
And a little side note here, Ialso felt like I was in
competition with myself to makethis year's holiday.
(04:10):
More special than last year'sholiday, and it just brought on
stress that I did not enjoy, andthen one day it hit me.
The reason my grandparents' homefelt so magical wasn't because
of the decorations or the foodor the gifts.
In fact, I recall a single.
Christmas tree as their holidaydecor.
(04:32):
And if I'm being honest, I thinkthat that Christmas tree would
not have been there if thegrandkids were not all headed to
their house for the season.
But anyway, what made it magicalwas the relationship I had with
them.
It was the smile on their faceswhenever we arrived, and the
tight hugs that I received thatfelt more like a squeeze that
(04:56):
made me feel incredibly welcome.
So wanted and cared for that iswhat made it meaningful, and
that is what gave it thatmagical feeling.
And when that hit me, it changedthe way that I see the holidays.
The magic was never in the decorand the food or the gifts.
(05:18):
It was truly in how much theyput an effort into being present
in our lives really is what madethe holidays magical.
And so that realization shapedhow I wanted to approach the
holidays moving forward.
now I know it's early November,but I also wanted to share it
with you now before the busynessbegins, so that you can start
(05:41):
thinking about what kind ofseason you want to create this
year with your family.
Because when your plans get ledby pressure, the joy gets lost
in the doing.
But when you plan with purpose,there is room for connection,
for peace and presence, whichare the very things that make
the holidays meaningful.
(06:03):
So if you're tired of runningyourself to exhaustion every
single year, trying to makeevery detail perfect.
Here is the first shift I wantto encourage you to make this
year.
I want you to plan with purposeand not pressure.
This is going to be where youdecide what matters most to your
family this season, and I wantyou to also set boundaries to
(06:24):
protect it.
I would even encourage you to.
Give yourself permission to letgo of everything else.
This is where pressure plans andpurposeful planning comes into
play.
because when your plans are ledby pressure, it drains the joy
out of preparing and enjoyingthe holidays, whether it be
making travel plans or juststaying at home plans on how you
(06:48):
are going to be enjoying theholidays this year with your
family.
It pulls us into a distractionand busyness, which is the exact
opposite of what we want,intentional time with our family
and memories that we're actuallygoing to cherish, now this
reminds me of Martha and Mary.
Like Martha, we can get caughtup in doing all the things to
(07:09):
make the holiday magical.
Jesus responds to Martha whenshe wants Mary to help by
saying, Martha.
Martha, you are anxious andtroubled about many things, but
one thing is necessary.
Mary has chosen the goodportion, which will not be taken
away from her, and sometranslations emphasize.
(07:29):
Only one thing is necessary,highlights how important it is
to have our eyes on Jesus as weplan with purpose instead of
letting this pressure run usthroughout the season.
And in Luke chapter eight, verse14, Jesus warns us that when the
word is choked by the cares,riches and pleasures of life, it
(07:53):
does not mature and bear fruit.
So holiday perfectionism worksin the same way.
It chokes what really matters tous.
And here's the thing.
The intentional time you spendwith your kids throughout the
year matters more than theperfectly decorated holidays or
the biggest gifts.
(08:14):
The anticipation and excitementof the season builds on the
relationship that you've alreadynurtured all year,.
Just like my grandparents did.
The magic wasn't in the seasonitself.
It was in the connection thatwas already there.
And that understanding naturallyleads us to the next step.
What can you do to make yourholidays meaningful without
(08:37):
pressure?
So the first thing I want you tothink about and really open
yourself up to is to be open tonew traditions or beginnings,
Because your kids grow and someold ones that you've already
established are going tonaturally fade.
But that doesn't mean that thememories or the connections are
(08:58):
lost, it actually gives you anopportunity to create something
new, which we're gonna talkabout in just a little bit.
And then the second thing I wantyou to do is to simplify your
plans, pick a few meaningfulactivities and plan for those.
For us, the big activities aregoing to see the Christmas
lights and baking Christmascookies.
(09:19):
Now, those are also the onesthat my husband and I will spend
more time planning and budgetingfor, because it does require
some financial means and it alsorequires time for us to be
available for these things.
We also have smaller activities,but those are not complicated
and don't require so much.
So I just work those in betweenthe two big activities that we
(09:42):
typically plan for each year.
And then the third thing I wantyou to keep in mind and to
practice doing is to say no,which can be hard for us because
we want to do everything aroundthe holidays, right?
But saying no to extra stresswhere possible is going to help
you tremendously remove thatpressure of the holidays.
(10:06):
So, for example, that could meanthat you are passing up on
adding new decor to what isalready existing in your
collection.
when you are passing up on thesenew decor, you're actually
saving yourself the stress andthe financial burden of adding
more things that's already intoyour collection.
And then another example issaying, no, to Friendsgiving
(10:30):
this year, or white elephant ifit becomes a financial burden.
And there's nothing wrong withthat.
You can go to one or two, butyou don't have to go to every
single thing that you areinvited to.
That's essentially what I amgetting at here.
So now that we've talked aboutwhat matters, let's dial in even
further with one simple memoryanchor that you can repeat.
(10:54):
And this is what I was talkingabout earlier, about being open
to new beginnings.
see as your kids grow, theirinterest is going to change.
So maybe pumpkin patches are nota thing that you do anymore.
Our kids are in the season wherethey're slowly growing out of
that.
And so that, has slowly phasedout over the years for us, and
(11:15):
it's sad, but I still love thememories that we've had.
Instead, this is going to be anopportunity for us to find
something new to do as a familytogether.
So it doesn't have to becomplicated.
In fact, I want you to keep itsimple so that it can be
repeated throughout the year.
That means this doesn't have tobe Pinterest perfect or
elaborate Don't feel pressure tofigure it out right away of what
(11:39):
this new tradition could be.
It's important to just feel yourway through it.
Maybe this year you trysomething and it wasn't a huge
win for everyone, so that justmeans onto the next, it's not a
fail.
It's actually pretty cool to seeyourself grow through the
seasons with your kids.
But the reason why I want you tokeep it simple is because it is
(12:02):
something that is going tobecome yours as a family.
And so that could just besomething like hot chocolate and
movie night, For us aroundThanksgiving, we used to go to
pumpkin patches, but now thisyear we're probably just gonna
play some games.
And then for Christmas we alwayswatch home Alone, the original
one because it's the best one,and eat little pretzel bites
(12:25):
that I've been making over thepast couple years.
And my kids love helping me putit together too,'cause it's
super easy and simple.
So that's what it looks like forus.
Those are our memory anchors.
And the reason creating thismemory anchor is important is
because it's going to buildconsistency.
And consistency matters.
(12:45):
When your family knows thatthere's this one special thing
that you always do together, itbuilds the anticipation, it
deepens the connection.
Of the relationship and itbrings in that wholesome joy
that you've been wanting tobring into your home for the
holidays.
These repeatable moments becomea memory anchor that your family
(13:08):
is going to remember for years.
They create meaningfulexperiences rooted in presence,
which means the decorations orthe pressure to cook an
elaborate meal are not going tohold you hostage during the
busyness of the season.
So now you know what the impactof a simple, repeatable memory
(13:29):
can have.
You might be wondering How doyou actually create one without
Mom guilt lingering over you?
I would say start small.
This is going to eliminate thepressure for you to add more
onto your plate.
So think about what is somethingthat you can do within your
routine that you've alreadyestablished throughout the year.
(13:51):
Is it a simple movie night?
Perhaps it's taking a strollafter dinner., And you can make
it holiday specific by playing afavorite holiday movie or if
you're going on a stroll playingthe game I Spy where you look
for things specific to thatseason or holiday.
And if your neighbors decoratetheir home, that's gonna be even
(14:12):
more fun.
My kids loved this.
They absolutely loved playing.
I Spy whenever we would take ourevening strolls.
And if your neighbors don'tdecorate their homes for
whatever reason, then this isalso a perfect opportunity for
you to ask questions relating tothe holiday.
So if it's Thanksgiving, youknow, asking them what they are
(14:35):
thankful for.
And if it's Christmas, then askthe question why do they believe
Jesus was born?
And it's not about who's rightor wrong, But this does give you
an opportunity to steward faithin them even more.
And the second thing is inviteparticipation.
Let your kids collaborate withyou, so if your tradition
(14:55):
involves baking.
Or any type of treats, let themhave their own batch and make it
fun and memorable and you know,it's no extra stress for you
because they're technicallyplanning the activities that
they want to do.
And then the third thing is tolet go of the picture.
Perfect.
And what I mean by this is.
(15:16):
There is this idea that you haveto get the most candid holiday
shot or the most perfect holidayphoto, And to do that can be
stressful.
I'm talking about no mess in thehome, no spilled flour from
baking or toys on the floor.
That honestly is nearlyimpossible, at least in my
(15:38):
house, and it's only realisticin a styled shoot.
Now I have taken my familypictures the last two or three
years.
I'm not a professional by anymeans, but I will tell you there
is always a section that looksclean while everything else is a
hot mess, and this is exactlyhow it's played out in my house.
(15:59):
I'll look at the camera screenand I'll ask my kids to move
their books, their toys orclothes out of the shot, and.
What you get is this holidaypicture that looks incredibly
festive, but in real life,everything outside of that shot
looks like a hot mess because inreal life, my house is not
(16:21):
always perfectly tidy.
And you know what?
That's okay.
Now, I'm not saying not to takethe photos.
I want you to take as manypictures as you want, but I want
you to remove that pressure thatyou put on yourself to keep your
house spotless while trying toenjoy the moment, and that is
going to make a huge differencebecause as your kids get older
(16:45):
and they look back on thosepictures, they're not going to.
Look at the toys that were allover the floor.
They're going to see andremember certain moments, in
that time that you've captured,and it's such a beautiful thing.
My kids love going back andlooking at past photos and
talking about memories thatstuck out to them, And it always
(17:05):
feels good, and I want that foryou too.
So let's recap what we talkedabout today, which is to plan
with purpose and not pressure.
This is where you decide whattruly matters most to your
family this season.
And of course, I want you togive yourself permission to let
go of everything else.
As Luke eight four reminds usthat the cares and pressures of
(17:26):
life can choke what reallymatters.
So choose purpose that protectsthe joy and presence that we
want to nurture this holidayseason.
So pick one simple memory anchorthat your family can look
forward to.
Keep it simple and involve yourkids.
And of course, let go of theneed for perfect decorations or
(17:47):
perfectly staged photos.
The imperfectness of your lifeare going to be what sticks with
your family for years to come.
At the end of the day, it's notabout magical Pinterest holidays
or doing all the things.
It's about showing up, beingpresent, and making intentional
choices that reflect what trulymatters.
(18:10):
That's what makes the holidaysmeaningful.
So just a heads up, the restoredmind will be slowing down this
month with biweekly episodesinstead of the usual weekly
episodes.
That way I can spend moreintentional time with my own
family this holiday season.
And you'll have more space toput these ideas into practice
(18:30):
with yours as well as being moreintentional with them.
And that is truly the reason whythe restored mind is slowing
down this holiday season.
So be sure to join the onlinecommunity.
The link is in the show notesfor any daily encouragement and
a peek behind the scenes ofwhat's coming up next.
Until next time, keep showingup.
(18:51):
Being present and becoming themom you want to be.
And when things get hard, mama,just remember you can do hard
things.
Thanks for hanging out with metoday, mama.
If this episode helped you inany way, would you do me a favor
(19:13):
and please share it with afellow mom that could also
benefit from this episode.
Until then, I'll see you nextWednesday, right here on this
podcast.
Go in peace.
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