i cannot wait for you to be part of this conversation with willow & jade salon owner + hairstylist, nikki grebel. nikki’s story is beyond inspiring—she’s gone against the odds to open her own hair salon while learning to love herself along the way. her journey is a beautiful reminder that success and self-love can grow side by side.
in this episode, we dive into how the energy you believe in (whether truth or placebo) can shift your perspective, how creating healthy environments—especially at work—supports your self-love journey, and how nikki fosters that atmosphere for her clients and team. you’ll leave this conversation feeling inspired to trust yourself more, surround yourself with goodness, and believe in the unseen things that push you toward loving yourself more.
you can find nikki here on instagram + the amazing willow & jade hair salon here
connect with julia on instagram @beautybyjulia + tik tok @juliasalvia
unlock more archive content on instagram @theselflovearchive + tik tok @theselflovearchives
sign up for the self-love archives newsletter: www.theselflovearchives.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
nikki grebel (00:00):
So you went to go see an energy healer.
I sure did.
And she told you what?
Okay.
So the most jarring thingshe told me was that I have,
well, had, she has clearedit since, but I had a djinn
or what she described as anevil little elf in my uterus.
(00:23):
So you had an evillittle elf in your youth?
That was, that had thislike, dark cloud around it.
And was inherited frommy mother, apparently.
Julia Salvia (00:33):
Okay.
nikki grebel (00:34):
So, she then went on to clear The evil elf.
Said elf.
Yes, exactly.
The said elf.
Um, she waved amagnet around my body.
I was like, what the fuckis this lady doing and
why am I paying for this?
And she's like swingingthis pendulum around in my
face and I'm like, oh myGod, what did I sign up for?
(00:54):
Like, I do weird stuff allthe time, but like this
is like topping the list.
I was gonna
Julia Salvia (00:59):
be like, that's next level.
Like, first you're telling methere's an elf in my uterus.
You're telling me it's.
Called a gin.
Yeah, and then you'rewaving a magnet around me.
nikki grebel (01:07):
Yeah, you're just like waving this
magnet around me And thenthough I felt a chill.
No, you didn't.
Yeah I felt this like chillfrom like I would say my
hips to my head and likethis like whoosh feeling Wow,
Julia Salvia (01:22):
okay, and
nikki grebel (01:23):
as it happened she was trembling She was
like and if the whoosh andthe chill didn't happen.
I'd be like Again, whatdid I fucking sign up for?
Julia Salvia (01:32):
Yeah, you'd be like, what did you bestow on me?
Yeah, I
nikki grebel (01:35):
don't, I have questions.
Like, what did Iget myself into now?
But, like, feeling that andthen her, like, trembling and
she said, did you feel that?
I was like, actually, yes.
She's like, well, it's gone.
It's cleared.
Where did it go?
I don't know.
That's my, that's my question.
Out of my head?
Okay, where did it go?
Like, out of my head somehow?
(01:55):
I don't
Julia Salvia (01:55):
know.
Personally, I believein all of this.
This energy healingstuff and like, intuitive
ability and whatnot.
But I agree with you.
If I didn't feel, if Iwas in your place and I
didn't feel that chill,
nikki grebel (02:07):
I
Julia Salvia (02:07):
would first confirm like, am I, am I cold?
Yeah.
Or am I actually feelingwhat I'm feeling?
Yeah.
I think that there's just that,um, what's the word for it?
Just questioning everything.
Yeah.
Going into this stuff,but I feel like doing that
makes me trust it moreif something does happen.
nikki grebel (02:27):
Oh, yeah.
It's like being open
Julia Salvia (02:29):
to it, but still questioning everything.
nikki grebel (02:30):
Yeah, I mean, I still, listen, like I said, I do
weird woo woo shit all the time.
Julia Salvia (02:36):
Mm hmm.
nikki grebel (02:36):
And I was in there and I was like, I'm
gonna give this my all andthen she's waving this magnet
around telling me there'san L for my uterus and I'm
like, I gotta, I gotta go.
Like, I don't,
Julia Salvia (02:46):
I don't, I don't know.
But no,
nikki grebel (02:48):
it was great.
Have you ever done
Julia Salvi (02:49):
anything like that?
No.
I have not personally.
I mean, I can read, like,psychically, like, for other
people, which is really cool,um, and people have read for me,
but nothing, I don't think thatthere's anything attached to me.
But sometimes I question ifsomething's, like, following me.
(03:10):
Okay.
Oh, that's like, that's
nikki grebel (03:13):
like a whole thing.
I mean, you mean likean energy following you?
Julia Salvia (03:18):
Yes, but I'm pretty positive that it's
like my, um, like my grandma.
nikki grebel (03:23):
Yeah.
Julia Salvia (03:23):
Like I don't think that it's an
energy that I don't know.
nikki grebel (03:28):
Yeah, like nothing dark or like mysterious.
Yeah, but did you feel
Julia Salvia (03:31):
like there was something before this?
Cause what, what brought youto going to an energy killer?
Cause that's I guess the,that's the real question.
nikki grebel (03:39):
Um, cause something must have been up.
Well, I was just havinga string of bad luck.
Julia Salvia (03:43):
Yeah.
nikki grebel (03:44):
I was kneeling down one day, tore my
meniscus, had to get surgery.
Um, I had been doing physicaltherapy for months, graduated
physical therapy, and thenext day got into a bad car
accident, like, got messed up.
Literally
Julia Salvia (03:58):
the next day.
The
nikki grebel (03:59):
next day.
And my acupuncturist was like,This, whatever's happening to
you, does not belong to you.
Like, please go get seen.
Julia Salvia (04:08):
Yeah.
nikki grebel (04:08):
And I went to see this energy healer, she was in
my acupuncturist's office, andshe cleared the evil elf and
apparently seven other energiesthat were attached to me.
Yeah.
So the
Julia Salvia (04:21):
evil elf, elf plus it's posse is seven.
Yeah, like Kate
nikki grebel (04:24):
plus eight.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Nikki, Nikki plus eight.
Exactly.
Me and my eight dark energies.
You and your dark energies.
And the head elf.
Julia Salvia (04:36):
I just picture them all as like little elves.
nikki grebel (04:38):
I know, like cute ones.
And the head elf
Julia Salvia (04:39):
in the uterus.
nikki grebel (04:40):
Yes! Yeah, so she cleared those
energies, but she saidalso like, you know, she's
like, you're a hairdresser,you work with people, like
that's a normal thing.
And I do feel like that happenswhen you're working on people
so closely and having intimateconversations with them.
Oh, I'm
Julia Salvia (04:55):
sure.
Oh yeah.
And we talk about.
Everything under the sun.
nikki grebel (04:59):
Literally.
And I don't
Julia Salvia (05:00):
know how, because we're half doing
it over a blow dryer.
I know! We're like, let meSo what's your PTSD?
nikki grebel (05:14):
Yeah, exactly.
Julia Salvia (05:15):
What happened when you were seven?
Exactly.
It's, I think, theway that women bond.
Oh yeah.
It has to be.
And I'm sure that, doyou believe that it
happens a lot like that?
Yeah.
In like, This space we'resitting in your salon right now.
Oh, yeahWelcome back to the self
(05:41):
love archives of podcast.
I'm your host Julia Salvia alsoknown as your self love Bestie.
Hi besties.
Welcome back or welcome ifyou are a new listener here
I'm so excited for you tohear this episode I'm chatting
with not only one of my goodfriends, but also The talent
(06:05):
the artistry behind thisgorgeous hair of mine And that
is Nikki Grebel the owner ofWillow and Jade hair salon
in Belmar, New Jersey I knowyou've already heard a little
bit about our conversationabout energies and What does
that have to do with self love?
Well, you are going to findout in the rest of the episode.
(06:28):
So keep on listeningand I hope you enjoy
nikki grebel (06:32):
Yeah, this place, especially, I think
just opens people up.
They feel comfortable, first ofall, but I don't know, I think
there's something energeticallyabout this space that makes
people feel like safe and likeable to be seen and heard.
And I tell my girls all thetime, the ones, the young ones.
(06:55):
The young stylists who areafraid to talk to people.
I'm like, talk to them becauseyou have no idea how cool
your clients probably are.
Julia Salvia (07:02):
Oh yeah.
nikki grebel (07:03):
Like, imagine I never talked
to you, that'd be crazy.
Julia Salvia (07:06):
I know, how sad it would be if I
didn't get to know you.
We wouldn't be sitting here!That's what I'm saying! Hahaha!
But, so, your name is Nikki.
nikki grebel (07:15):
Sure is.
And you own?
Willow and Jade, right here.
In Belmar, New Jersey.
We're a hair salon,first and foremost.
But we do bridal makeup andstyling and stuff like that.
Um, we have Styliststhat specialize in pretty
much any hair type here.
Julia Salvia (07:31):
I mean, I've seen some of the crazy work that you
guys can do here is it's insane.
It's like I feel like I'm justlike on that level of very basic
And I and like but the fact thatthat can be done so well and
then to see some of the crazylike artistic work On someone's
head that people can do here.
Oh, yeah, I look at it the um,the one that was like neopolis
(07:56):
and ice cream Oh, yeah, thatwas sick or the calico cat.
nikki grebel (07:59):
Yep.
Yeah.
Jules does some crazycolor work It's artistry.
Honestly,
Julia Salvi (08:04):
really it's insane.
nikki grebel (08:05):
Yeah,
Julia Salvia (08:06):
and i've never seen anything like it.
nikki grebel (08:08):
Oh, yeah, it's beautiful It's awesome because
we selected We hired everyonefor culture, so we wanted
everyone to give that feelof we care about our clients.
It's not just about them.
Julia Salvia (08:20):
Yeah,
nikki grebel (08:20):
so like they're delivering amazing work
like that, but they're alsomaking the client feel like
they have an experience.
Julia Salvia (08:26):
Of course.
Yeah, which is so important.
I think in any in any business,but I think most especially
like the salon hairstylingbusiness because there's some
there's just some bad Repgoing on with like hair salons.
I guess more internallylike I haven't experienced
it As a, actually,whoa, I take that back.
No way.
I was going tosay, and not here.
(08:47):
Definitely not here.
Oh, thank God.
Because I do get my hairdone at Willow and Jamie.
With Nikki.
Yes.
Um, absolutely no bad energy.
Every time I come here,like, I'm excited to show up.
I'm excited to chat.
Like, I'm excited tojust have a girl's time.
Oh,
nikki grebel (09:01):
please.
Everyone
Julia Salvia (09:02):
sees your name in
nikki grebel (09:02):
the book and they're like, Julia's coming in.
Aw,
Julia Salvia (09:05):
they're so cute.
I, I even like, I'm like, hi,this is, we know who we are.
Exactly.
Like, you answered thephone that one time, you're
like, we have caller ID.
Yeah, I know who you are.
I'm working the front today,I see that you're calling.
Yeah.
But, um, in other places, I'vedefinitely, um, heard from other
(09:25):
people how bad sometimes theatmosphere can be in salons.
And, I think that'sso amazing that you
really built this place.
On the premise of not justhaving people who are skilled
to do the work, but creatingthe atmosphere of people to.
Create a betteratmosphere for clients.
Oh, that's so importantThat's how I hire to
(09:47):
like or how I choose tohave people on my team.
You give me a badfeeling I don't want you.
nikki grebel (09:51):
Yeah.
Oh, yeah the hiring.
I'm gonna listen.
It's crazy.
Yeah, I'm gonna listen my gutYeah, exactly And now that we
have like a team that knowsthe drill and they're like we
know how we have to show upif we're Hiring anyone else
we're doing working interviewsand they have to be around the
team and the team will tellus Yeah, you know we had one
girl she was in for two hours,and they were like, we don't
(10:13):
know if it's a good fit, and Iwas like, alright, she's out.
I trust you guys, you know?
Yeah,
Julia Salvia (10:16):
that's so good.
I think, of course, and tofeel like you can build that
trust with people, like as ifthey're, you know, they have
the respect for you as a boss,but also that you're a friend
and that they can come toyou, I feel like creates such
a safe work environment too.
Yeah.
Which is so missing andso, Many workplaces.
nikki grebel (10:36):
Yeah,
Julia Salvia (10:36):
it's so important
nikki grebel (10:37):
that took a while for us to really figure that out
Julia Salvia (10:40):
Yeah,
nikki grebel (10:41):
because we started the salon In 2022, a lot of
our friends came to work forus, and I'd been managing the
salon we were at in the past,but it's different when you own.
Julia Salvia (10:51):
Oh, of course.
nikki grebel (10:52):
Yeah.
So, our friends came, they'relike, yeah, we're gonna be
doing hair with our friends!And we're like, actually,
like, we have boundariesand standards, you know?
Yeah.
You know, there was alot to navigate there.
And then we were like, Oh myGod, we have a team of, I think
the highest number we had atone time was there were 17 of
Julia Salvia (11:12):
us
nikki grebel (11:12):
and we were like, how do we give everyone
individual attention?
Julia Salvia (11:16):
Cause that's a lot of people.
nikki grebel (11:16):
Yeah.
So then we startedhaving like one on one
meetings with them weekly.
That was too much.
And they were also like.
They thought they weregetting, like, fired
every time we were like,
Julia Salvia (11:26):
Hey, come talk to us in the office!
We're like, no, we just wantto make sure that we have,
like, set time for you.
Yeah, and I'm
nikki grebel (11:31):
like, I just want to make sure you're
mentally, like, okay, actually.
You're not getting fired at all.
It's, like, quite the opposite.
But, like,
Julia Salvia (11:37):
wouldn't that right there kind of set
off some, like, red flagsthat their work environment
wasn't great in the past?
Yeah.
Or that people have thisidea of this unsafe.
Or, like, lack of communicationtype of, like, work environment.
Yeah.
Cause it's crazy to think that,oh, you're going into a meeting
with your boss and, like, thefirst thing you think of is,
(11:57):
oh, shit, I'm getting fired.
Yeah.
nikki grebel (11:58):
That's so sad.
I know.
I mean, I think if the roleswere reversed and, like,
I was in the space that Ihad been in in the past, I
would be like, oh my god,yeah, I am getting fired.
We're
Julia Salvia (12:07):
100 percent doing the same thing, you know?
Why do you
nikki grebel (12:09):
care?
Yeah.
Julia Salvia (12:12):
Why are you giving a shit?
Yeah, exactly.
nikki grebel (12:15):
But that's, I think, what changes the game
for small business owners.
Oh, yeah.
Is like, yeah, youare a small business.
You have employees thatare from all walks of life.
What are they going through?
How can you support them?
Especially in an industrylike this where we're
really trying to build ourstylists up and there's a
lot of training involved.
(12:36):
It's very special in that case.
But, yeah, I mean, doingthose check ins though changed
the game, and that's whatreally tightened the team.
Julia Salvia (12:46):
Yeah, I think there's a fine line
between being a boss andbeing a friend, but I really
think that there needs tobe a little bit of both.
Yeah.
But I think what comesin between that is
setting boundariesand respect and trust.
Being communicative,like, on both ends.
Oh, yeah.
On, you know, the person whoThe employer and the employee,
(13:09):
like, so incredibly importantto actually make, like, the
workspace run efficiently andgive the place the atmosphere
that you want it to have,the welcoming, safe space.
A thousand percent.
And I think you guysare definitely doing it.
For sure.
Thank you.
Especially now thatthat little elf is gone.
You could do it tenfold.
nikki grebel (13:26):
Oh.
Honestly, yes.
Thank God the elf is gone.
I kind of miss him.
I wish I had more timewhere I knew about him.
Oh my goodness.
Julia Salvia (13:34):
Did you know that, um, so what was the
feeling actually like beforeyou went to the energy healer
that like you, that you felt?
nikki grebel (13:45):
Um, I do attribute part of the feeling to the
car accident I was in becauseI had a concussion that,
like, wrecked me emotionally.
I didn't know thatconcussions did that.
First of all, I thought,like, you got concussions
if you played football andthey lasted three days.
I didn't realize theywere, like, this whole
very serious thing.
Julia Salvia (14:02):
I feel like, I mean, just like, I was
doing some work on, on brainsyesterday, so, like, no
brain surgeon or anything.
I'm, like, What?
I was looking, I was lookingstuff up that was really
interesting that apparently,Your brain, it does not
matter whether you'refeeling emotional pain or
physical pain, your brainprocesses it, processes it?
(14:23):
Processes?
Yeah! The same exact way.
Oh!So your brain processes physical
pain and emotional pain inthe same part of your brain.
So it doesn't really tellthe, you can't really
tell the difference.
Yeah! Or your brain can't reallytell the difference.
nikki grebel (14:37):
Yeah, that's wild actually.
Right?
Yeah! So I'm
Julia Salvia (14:39):
thinking in regards to a concussion, I guess
it would depend where in yourbrain you got the concussion?
nikki grebe (14:45):
Yeah, I don't know.
All I know is that You'refeeling it emotionally?
Oh my god.
Right after the accident,I couldn't stop crying.
Like, I couldn't stop crying.
It was crazy.
My acupunct Freaking shout outto Megan, my acupuncturist.
Honestly, she like called me,she's like, I heard you can't
stop crying, come to my house.
And she's like, I'm justgonna put a bunch of
needles in your head.
(15:06):
And I was like, okay, andI'm like crying on this
table, this acupuncturetable in her basement.
Like still consistently crying.
Like physically could
Julia Salvia (15:13):
not stop crying.
nikki grebel (15:14):
Yeah.
It was hard to work.
I had to like keep it in.
It was crazy.
I was emotional at all times.
And I. I wouldn't have
Julia Salvia (15:22):
worn makeup for any of those days.
No,
nikki grebel (15:25):
there
Julia Salvia (15:26):
was no
nikki grebel (15:26):
mascara
Julia Salvia (15:27):
to be had.
I actually didn'twear mascara today.
I forgot, but we'll sayit's because just in case
I have like a little happy
nikki grebel (15:33):
cry
Julia Salvia (15:33):
with you.
Perfect.
nikki grebel (15:36):
Yeah, so I feel like I was in
this like depression,like a funk after that.
And I was also just like stuckin this cycle of bad things
are always happening to me.
Like I just had thisknee surgery, which.
I know that wasn't the case.
Like, I had the kneesurgery, and I was freaking
out that I couldn't work.
The salon did better when Iwasn't here, which Was very
(15:57):
fucking humbling, but I waslike, that's a little humbling.
I know, I was like, damn.
Maybe they're like, we want toimpress her while she's gone.
Yeah, I was like, it'sall actually because they
really wanted to work extrahard because I wasn't here.
But then like, this caraccident happened, and my
jeep, which I like attachedso much love to this material
object, I loved my jeep.
Was totaled, you know, andthen I was also like, you
(16:19):
know, I have no control.
I was hit from behind, therewas nothing I could have done.
So I was likespiraling constantly.
And then, I'm not gonna saythe elf being removed from my
body is what really changedeverything, but I did start to
feel this sense of lightness.
Julia Salvia (16:35):
Yeah.
nikki grebel (16:36):
And maybe it was a placebo thing, and I just
needed to change my mentality.
I
Julia Salvia (16:40):
was just gonna say that.
I sometimes think that For thisis like for the people who don't
believe in energy that don'tbelieve in intuitive ability
that don't believe in psychicability Whatever whatever yeah,
this is for those people thatdon't believe in that I really
think that sometimes the thereI mean there's scientific
proof about placebo effect.
Mm hmm that if we believesomething has been Magically
(17:03):
removed from us and we genuinelybelieve that that we can
actually start like this pathto healing Yeah, so If you
don't believe in energy, like, Idon't know, believe, like, maybe
believe it just to help youget on the right path forward.
Oh, yeah.
Because I'm sure in that momentyou're like, okay, well this
little elf is gone, poof, bye.
(17:23):
But you still are doingwhat you need to do to
help your body physically,help yourself mentally.
Exactly.
To move
nikki grebel (17:31):
forward.
Yeah.
I had, I actually had anotherplacebo thing happen last year.
Mm
Julia Salvia (17:39):
hmm.
nikki grebel (17:40):
That my friend Steph kept bringing up.
Julia Salvia (17:43):
Mm hmm.
nikki grebel (17:43):
Um, I had to get a crown put in my, one of my
teeth, like an on lay crown.
Julia Salvia (17:49):
Yeah.
nikki grebel (17:50):
And, the dentist came out and he's
like, oh, the lab made amistake, this crown is gold.
And I was like, okay, Imean, it's my back molar.
I guess I don't care, but like,I'm going to have a gold tooth.
Like, that's crazy.
Julia Salvia (18:04):
Yeah.
nikki grebel (18:06):
Yeah.
Like what?
I was like, who do I think I am?
I mean, give me thegold tooth though.
Cause I'm not comingback for this.
Like, this is crazy.
So I have a gold online crownin the back of my mouth.
And when I got it, I waslike, Oh my God, I think
that this gold crown ismaking me very abundant.
Like I was like, I gotlike a check in the mail
for like a hundred dollarsfor like no reason.
Like.
(18:26):
All of these deals werehappening for me in my
favor and I was like, Ohmy God, my gold tooth is
just making me abundant.
And I believed that forlike probably a year and
I was like, all of thesegood things are happening,
but it's not that I have agold tooth and that that's
making me lucky or abundant.
It's that I have the beliefthat I am now abundant.
Julia Salvia (18:50):
It's true.
nikki grebel (18:51):
Exactly.
But
Julia Salvia (18:52):
I feel like I don't, it's
like, I don't want to.
Disregard the feeling thatsomething can give you or the
truth behind like an energyBut if it's gonna give you And
affect the way like a placeboeffect would or like, yeah,
those books like the power ofnow and things like that I think
our mindsets are so incrediblyimportant to help like push us
(19:15):
forward that like yeah Fuck.
Yeah, the gold tooth gaveyou some abundance exactly.
Yeah,
nikki grebel (19:20):
because it couldn't be me.
It would have to besomething external I
Julia Salvia (19:23):
think we're so hard on ourselves too
in that way where we thinkthat it has to be something
else It can't just be us.
Yep.
It can't just be That, thatwe're putting in the work,
that we're doing, like,all the, like, doing all
the things that we need to,to push ourselves forward.
It has to be the gold tooth.
nikki grebel (19:38):
Yeah.
It has to be theremoval of the elf.
Exactly.
I was talking to my friendStephanie about it because I
also So, your listeners aregoing to think I'm crazy, but
a month ago, I was driving inmy now new car and I'm driving
behind this big truck and ithas a like bobcat, like one of
(20:01):
those, I don't know, like oneof those big machines, not a
crane, but one of those guys.
Um, it has a bobcat sticking outat the top and I'm behind it and
it's going under an overpass.
Julia Salvia (20:11):
Oh my god.
nikki grebel (20:13):
Let me hold on to my seat for this story.
Yeah, so.
Obviously you're here,so I know you're fine.
Uh huh.
Continue.
Um, it hit the overpass andchunks of cement came down.
And of course, me, drivinglike an idiot, I'm like kind
of riding this guy's ass.
I should not have been doing it.
Julia Salvia (20:31):
It's fine.
nikki grebel (20:31):
I swerved out of the way.
I was okay.
Julia Salvia (20:34):
But.
Is your car fine?
nikki grebel (20:35):
My car is fine.
Julia Salvia (20:36):
Wow, okay.
nikki grebel (20:37):
But like these giant chunks of cement
would have hit my car.
And I would have literallybeen final destination.
And when it didn't happen.
Great, while you'resitting here.
Yes.
Wow.
When it didn't happen, I textedmy friend Steph and I was
like, Oh my God, Steph, like.
This just happened.
Can you believe that?
Do you think I'm cursed?
(20:57):
And she's like, Nikki,first of all, you're not
fucking cursed up saying it.
And she's like, youare divinely protected.
She's like, you thought itwas your gold tooth last year.
She's like, it's you.
It's not yourfucking gold tooth.
Stop trying to think thatyou need external things to
validate you when it's just you,you, as you are like you as.
(21:19):
You are as a human being.
Yeah,
Julia Salvia (21:21):
and I think everybody needs to
start to realize that.
But if we have to use theselittle external things,
like a gold tooth, a littlelove, like, that's fine.
Do it.
I used to actually use, um,in relationships, I used
to use my future daughter.
As my, like, little, Iguess, placebo in a way.
I love that.
Cause I'm like, I know,I think there's every
(21:43):
part of me, I think I'mjust, I'm just funny now.
Um, cause I'm, I, I don'tlike when people kind of
make the assumption that,Oh, you'll have kids one day.
Cause no, that's my choice.
I could decide tomorrow Idon't want to have kids.
But I think, withinme, I know I will.
Um, how that plays out, whenthat plays out, I don't know.
And I'm not worried about it.
(22:04):
Um, I just let, letit go as it, as it is.
But, I know that I'mgoing to have a daughter.
And I always use her asmy, If, if I have a moment
where I don't feel goodenough, or worthy enough of a
situation that's not so good.
I ask myself the question,would you allow this to happen
(22:25):
to your future daughter?
nikki grebel (22:27):
Okay.
That's crazy.
Cause I literally starteddoing that this week.
No! I'm like, I'm gonna have adaughter and would I allow
this treatment of her?
Would I let my daughter talkto herself the way that I'm
talking to myself right now?
How do I need to be for myfuture daughter so that I can
raise someone who's strong?
(22:48):
That's so crazy.
Julia Salvia (22:50):
I am over the moon.
I am so excited to tell youall about bloom An immersive
self love experience.
This is my event.
This is our event.
This is the self love archivesIRL in real life, self love
(23:10):
event coming to central NewJersey in 2025, this September
28th, you can experienceover 100 vendors, over 600
attendees that are goingto be in this one space.
Wanting to love themselves more.
(23:31):
They're there with that sameidea, that same purpose of
wanting to love themselves more.
I created Bloom because Iwanted there to be an immersive
experience where you haveall of the little things that
you do for yourself to loveyourself more, all in one space.
(23:51):
So I'm talking, grabbing yourfavorite book, planning a
little hangout with your girls.
Getting some flowers foryourself, having a little
bite to eat, just being in aspace that is creative, that
is aesthetic, that is fun.
Basically, it's a self loveexpo, with a little twist,
because we like to keepthings aesthetic, we like
(24:13):
to keep things comfortable,we like to keep things
welcoming at Bloom events.
And there's really onlyone thing that I have
to tell you about Bloom.
It's that you deservea day like this.
So why not come?
So why not spend a dayloving yourself more?
(24:38):
Pre sale tickets are availableon our website right now, but
get them fast because thereare only a certain amount of
pre sale tickets available.
So I hope you'll grab a ticket.
I hope to see you there.
And I absolutely cannot waitto bloom together in 2025.
(24:59):
So I want to go back to,um, You starting to think of
like your future daughter.
nikki grebel (25:05):
I think of it as like, inspiration for
how I'm treating myself.
Yes,
Julia Salvia (25:11):
because I think we always look at, um,
I think some people use itas their friends or their
sister or their best friend.
Um, you know, asking thequestion, If someone's
treating you badly, wouldyou allow the way that you're
being treated, in whateverway you're being treated?
For someone to treatsomeone you love that way.
Exactly.
Because sometimes we putourselves so low that we don't
(25:35):
put ourselves at the samevalue as the people we love.
Yep.
Because we see them as so high.
You know, not that they'relike better than us or anything
like that, but we just seethem as so valuable in our
lives that we look at theirvalue higher than our own.
Oh yeah.
So, that's such a strongquestion, if, to like self
reflect on that, especiallyif you're getting that gut
(25:57):
feeling of like, am I beingtreated the right way?
Is this okay?
Oh yeah.
If you can stop for asecond and ask yourself that
question, I think it couldpotentially change your life.
It's powerful.
Oh yeah.
nikki grebel (26:08):
It's so powerful.
And you know what?
A lot of it came from thinkingabout the conversations
I have with clients here.
I have a lot of clientswho are moms, you know,
their daughters are.
Oh my god, their daughtersare getting older.
I've been doing their hairsince the daughters were babies.
Julia Salvia (26:24):
That's crazy.
nikki grebel (26:25):
Yeah, um, I have one client in particular,
and she knows that I'mgonna call her out on this.
I love her very much, but shePicks herself apart every time
she sits in front of the mirror.
Julia Salvia (26:39):
Hmm.
nikki grebel (26:40):
She is, she's a beautiful woman inside and out,
Julia Salvia (26:43):
but she's
nikki gre (26:43):
calling herself ugly.
She would never dare saythis about anyone else.
She's ugly, she callsherself fat, she's
saying all these things.
She brings her daughterto her appointments.
She's looking at herselfin the mirror and her
daughter's sitting rightnext to her watching this.
Julia Salvia (26:55):
Ugh.
nikki grebel (26:57):
And her daughter started saying, Mom, like,
I'm, I need to lose weight.
The daughter's 12.
Julia Salvia (27:03):
Gut wrench.
Gut wrench.
nikki grebel (27:05):
And.
Her daughter goes to thebathroom at that, like a
couple of minutes later.
And her mom, the mom says,can you believe she says
she needs to lose weight?
She's beautiful.
Like she doesn't needto, you know, and she's
perfect the way she is.
And I had to say, and I don'tlike interjecting, but I felt
like I've been like, I'vebeen known this family for 10
(27:27):
years, clients end up becomingfamily with us a lot of times.
And I said, and I had todo this for her daughter.
And I said, do you think.
That she's learningthis behavior from you.
And I probably could havestructured the question
better, because I wasbasically like, you're wrong.
Julia Salvia (27:48):
Sometimes I think people need to hear it
like straight forward, likeshe probably isn't even aware
nikki grebel (27:53):
of the
Julia Salvia (27:53):
effect that, of how she treats herself can
have an effect on her daughter.
nikki grebel (27:58):
Yeah, so she said, what do you mean?
I said, well I just watched you.
Destroy yourself in the mirror.
You just picked every aspectof your appearance apart.
You know?
And she was, like,taking it back.
She didn't even realizeshe was doing it.
Julia Salvia (28:20):
Yeah, I think it's like a subconscious thing
that we do not even realize.
Yeah!And it's scary because when it's
So sub, like in our conscious,like in, in our subconscious
that we are doing it like that.
We don't even realize theeffect that has on ourselves.
Yeah.
But especially other peopleand especially the people that
are, you know, we're supposedto be the, like, leader
(28:43):
for, like the, for our kids.
Like.
Exactly.
That's crazy.
nikki grebel (28:47):
Yeah.
So after seeing that, you know.
Um, I thought about myfuture, like I want to
have a baby one day.
I do always have this visionthat I'm going to have
a daughter and, uh, likeit would be a crime if my
husband was not a girl dad.
Julia Salvia (29:05):
He was like, I say the same thing to him.
Really?
I would love to have likea boy to like, I would
love to just a girl, a boy.
I think most people kind offeel that way, but yeah, I
feel like it would heal justlike our Like both of our
inner, inner childs to haverepre like, not someone, but
like a, our kid, like to havea representation of like us.
(29:25):
Yeah,
nikki grebel (29:26):
and just to maybe try to do it a
little better this timearound than what we had.
Julia Salvia (29:31):
Oh yeah.
Your inner child.
Mm hmm.
Cause I'm sure that yousee yourself within your,
your daughter as likea, you know, your child.
Yeah.
Where do you see, what partsof yourself do you see in her?
nikki grebel (29:46):
I would say strength, determination,
like, I, we've talkedabout this obviously, but
for those who don't know,I had a rough upbringing.
There was a lot of physicaland emotional abuse.
And one thing that I pridemyself on is the strength that
(30:07):
it took to get out of that.
Julia Salvia (30:08):
Yeah.
nikki grebel (30:09):
So yeah, so I had an interesting childhood.
Mm hmm.
She was very trying.
Julia Salvia (30:17):
Mm hmm.
nikki grebel (30:18):
Um, and I feel like, for the long time
actually, I didn't want kids.
Because I was like, whatdid I have to learn?
Like, what did I have, who didI have to teach me how to be?
Someone's guide andsomeone's leader.
You know?
And as time went on and Istarted actually becoming a
leader in my own business andin other people's businesses, I
(30:38):
realized, like, I think that my,what I perceived as my weakness
is going to be my strength.
Julia Salvia (30:47):
Mm hmm.
nikki grebel (30:48):
Like, knowing all of the things that have
gone wrong are going tohelp me in the long run.
Julia Salvia (30:54):
You know, there's a point in astrology
that literally is that.
nikki grebel (30:57):
What do you mean?
It's
Julia Salvia (30:58):
called, it's called Chiron.
And it's your painand your healing.
So it's where you have pain andit's where you find healing.
Interesting.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's a really, it's areally cool point and I, I
don't think that it gets.
enough knowledge.
No.
Or like, it doesn't gettalked about enough.
nikki grebel (31:13):
Yeah, no.
But it's
Julia Salvia (31:14):
so interesting.
Especially when youread someone's chart
and you look for that.
I'm like, oh shit, Iknow your entire life.
nikki grebel (31:20):
Really?
Oh yeah.
Oh my god.
Like, if
Julia Salvia (31:22):
you have Chiron in the 8th house, um, the
8th house is like debts,inheritance, um, taxes.
Uh huh.
It's like, a veryinteresting house.
Yeah.
But it mostly has to dowith money you can't see.
Interesting.
And if you have Chiron there,my first assumption is,
you most likely have Somestruggle with either things
(31:43):
that you have inherited.
nikki grebel (31:45):
Okay.
Julia Salvia (31:46):
Maybe you have a difficulty with, um, like you're
in massive amounts of debt.
nikki grebel (31:51):
Okay.
Julia Salvia (31:52):
But that's your learning, essentially.
Like that's where you're goingto learn a lot about yourself.
And if you can push throughthat pain that you have
in that area of your life,you can find healing.
nikki grebel (32:04):
Interesting.
Yeah.
We have to see where yours is.
I know.
I'm like, are we goingto also do like a birth
chart thing later?
Is your phone in the back?
Uh, I could turn it on.
But yeah, I actually like,I thought about this a lot
actually when you askedme to be on the podcast.
Like when I was like, Oh,what are we talking about?
(32:26):
Like business?
And you're like, no Nikki,my podcast is actually called
the self love archives.
Like.
It's about self love and I waslike, I was like taken aback.
I was like, what does she mean?
I can't talk aboutloving myself.
Julia Salvia (32:37):
Yes, you can.
nikki grebel (32:38):
Yes, I can.
But I had to think about itbecause I just I guess I never
put intentional thought to it.
Mm
Julia Salvia (32:43):
hmm,
nikki grebel (32:44):
and I was like, wow, I guess I really friggin
hate myself like what the helland then I realized like no The
things that I've done to showself love are just a little
unconventional to other people.
So having this difficultupbringing Um I didn't really
have boundaries with anyone.
(33:05):
I didn't show myself thatrespect like you would want
your daughter to show herself.
Um, and when I turned 28,yeah, when I was 28, I cut my
whole family out of my life.
Julia Salvia (33:19):
Funny.
nikki grebel (33:21):
Is that,
Julia Salvia (33:22):
what?
It's another astrology thing.
nikki grebel (33:24):
Is this my Saturn return?
Julia Salvia (33:26):
And
nikki grebel (33:27):
do you know what, do
Julia Salvia (33:27):
you know what a Saturn return
means, essentially?
Usually like trialsand tribulations.
Boundaries.
Ugh, boundaries.
The most.
Significant parts of someone'slife, like, you know, those
parts of our lives that wealways think about are so
big, like, we get, when weget married, when we break
up with someone, when someonepasses away, when we cut people
(33:49):
out of our lives, when weget a new job, or we lose a
job, like, huge things happenaround our Saturn return, and
28 to like 30 is when we gothrough our Saturn return.
It depends, of course, like,you know, some specifics,
but our Saturn return isabout two and a half years.
That is wild.
If you ask anybody, whathappened when you were 28 to 30?
What big thingshappened in your life?
(34:11):
Yeah.
And I could, I couldname some for anybody.
Like someone That's crazy.
Me?
My dad died.
nikki grebel (34:18):
Yeah.
Julia Salvia (34:20):
Then you have my boyfriend got a new job.
nikki grebel (34:23):
Yeah, like all these crazy big things.
Nikki?
Cut her whole familyout of her life.
Cut my whole familyout of my life.
My dad died, I opened a salon.
That's insane.
Yeah.
Well that was like 28 to 31.
Julia Salvia (34:37):
Still.
nikki grebel (34:38):
Yeah.
Still
Julia Salvia (34:39):
like all a part of it in like the bigger picture.
And now.
That's crazy.
You're past your Saturn return.
nikki grebel (34:44):
Yeah.
Julia Salvia (34:44):
How
nikki grebel (34:44):
does that feel?
I don't fucking know.
I'm getting evil elves extractedout of my body right now.
Julia Salvia (34:53):
But it's crazy looking back on, on these
parts of our, ourselves.
In that self love journey ofyours to be like, oh shit.
Yeah.
Wow.
Okay Look at all these thingsthat I went through and look
at who I am today And maybeyou're still in a place where
you need growth in some spotsin some places I mean, we're
always gonna be constantlygrowing but to see where you
(35:14):
came from Where that sevenyear old Nikki came from is so
wild, and I'm so proud of you.
Thank you.
Of course.
I'm proud of you.
No, no, no.
I'm proud of you.
This podcast isn'tabout me today.
It's about you.
No, you hang up first.
nikki grebel (35:25):
No,
Julia Salvia (35:26):
you hang up.
No,
nikki grebel (35:28):
you hang up.
Yeah.
No, it is absolutely insane,but also I want to thank you
for even, for inviting meonto this because honestly, I
needed to have those thoughtsand to really like analyze.
Why it felt so uncomfortablefor me to be like, I'm gonna
talk about loving myself.
What the hell.
How do I get out of this?
(35:49):
No, I was
Julia Salvia (35:53):
like,
nikki grebel (35:53):
I'm doing uncomfortable things
because I need to grow
Julia Salvia (35:57):
That's what it is.
I mean uncomfortable thingsare what what help us
grow and um a self lovejourney Is our entire life.
Yes.
It's not like a moment or maybethere are some moments that like
stick out But it's our entirelife and yeah That's gonna be
like really uncomfortable tosay to look at ourselves in the
mirror Like I hope that clientof yours does and say I love
(36:17):
myself Mm hmm takes a lot andsometimes you probably won't
believe yourself, but yeah,it takes a lot to actually
say it do it Be about it.
Choose it.
Absolutely.
All of the above.
nikki grebel (36:27):
And I think that there is something to
be said about the idea thatit can be easier for you to
do it if you're like, Oh, I'mnot just doing this for me.
I'm doing this formy future daughter.
Julia Salvia (36:39):
Yeah.
nikki grebel (36:40):
I'm doing this for people who are looking that
I might not even be aware of.
People I'm inspiringthat I'm not aware of.
I mean, I think the one battleis to really get it to the
point where you're like, no, I'mactually doing this for myself.
I
Julia Salvia (36:55):
think it's a good start.
It's like doing it for someoneelse, especially if we're in
a place where we don't feelso great or we're in a really
tough spot, like we're in anabusive relationship or we're
in a relationship with a friendthat is really Discouraging
and yeah, if or if we're in aplace mentally where we just
(37:15):
don't feel good about who weare sometimes having that little
bit of a crutch to use someoneor something else that means a
lot to us as the First step intoour journey of loving ourselves.
It can be So helpful.
Yeah.
But of course it'sa self love journey.
It's about the self.
If we can come back torealizing that we're really
(37:38):
doing this for us, because ifwe love ourselves, everyone
will, you know, flock tous in the ways that they're
supposed to be in our lives.
Yeah.
We'll have greatrelationships around us.
We'll have greatpeople around us.
We'll have great thingsaround us because we decided
to say, no, I'm goingto, I'm going to love me.
Yeah.
(37:59):
So that I can love you.
nikki grebel (38:01):
That was a fucking mic drop moment, sister.
I don't
Julia Salvia (38:04):
want to drop this.
nikki grebel (38:07):
Yeah, don't drop the new mic, but
Julia Salvia (38:11):
But it's so true.
And what, what do you thinkabout your, to kind of like
bring this all full circle.
Like we're in an email, butit's my favorite saying,
bring this full circle.
What would you say is thebiggest part of your self
love journey that got you,what's the biggest thing that
got you from You know, sincewe're on seven year old Nikki.
(38:31):
Yeah.
From seven year oldNikki to who Nikki
nikki grebel (38:34):
is today.
I think it's taking the timeto honor and reflect on the
difficult things that I've done.
Mm hmm.
And the way that I've kindof gone against the odds.
Like, the way that I was raised,I don't think a lot of people
(38:55):
would have been able to handle.
Julia Salvia (38:57):
I
nikki grebel (38:57):
have two sisters, and they're, you know, my
younger sister, she's tryingher hardest to do okay.
She's starting her own journey,and you know, healing from our
childhoods, and she's like,I don't know how you did it.
And I always triedto protect her.
Julia Salvia (39:11):
Yeah.
nikki grebel (39:12):
You know, like, she didn't know that the
craziness was going on, forthe most part, because I was
trying to protect her from it.
Julia Salvia (39:17):
Yeah.
nikki grebel (39:17):
But, I think that allowing myself to
feel proud of who I ambecause of what I've been
through, is the biggest part.
And for a long time, I thoughtthat I was being a pompous
jerk for being like, I'vedone it, I can do this, I
have confidence because I'vegone through worse shit.
(39:39):
But I think stepping into thathas allowed me to become a
better leader, a better wife.
A better friend, abetter communicator,
all of those things.
Julia Salvia (39:49):
Yeah, of course.
I love that so much.
Thank you.
Thank
nikki grebel (39:52):
you.
Thank you for being here.
I appreciate you.
I can't wait to see you againin two days for a blackout.
I know.
I can't wait toget my hair done.
It's gonna be stunning.
Hell yeah.
Thank you.
Thank you.
I really appreciate it.
I love you.
Julia Salvia (40:06):
I love you.
Thank you so much always fortuning in to this episode.
I hope you enjoyed it.
But as much as I enjoyedhaving this conversation with
Nikki, such a sweet, kindsoul, and such an amazing
story, and I hope you feltlike this conversation was
(40:26):
as if you were just in acircle of best friends.
Because that's truly how itfelt editing this video, I felt
like I was taken, I was justlike watching our conversation
on FaceTime all over again.
And I hope you learned alittle bit about yourself
(40:46):
from this episode.
And of course, as always,don't forget to love yourself
a little bit more this week.
I will see you in just twoweeks for our next episode
where we talk all aboutBloom and all of the super
exciting things coming.
Thank you for listening, onceagain, I love you so much.
(41:08):
Have the best week ever,and I'll see you soon.
Bye.
So you went to go see an energy healer.
I sure did.
And she told you what?
Okay.
So the most jarring thingshe told me was that I have,
well, had, she has clearedit since, but I had a djinn
or what she described as anevil little elf in my uterus.
(00:23):
So you had an evillittle elf in your youth?
That was, that had thislike, dark cloud around it.
And was inherited frommy mother, apparently.
Julia Salvia (00:33):
Okay.
nikki grebel (00:34):
So, she then went on to clear The evil elf.
Said elf.
Yes, exactly.
The said elf.
Um, she waved amagnet around my body.
I was like, what the fuckis this lady doing and
why am I paying for this?
And she's like swingingthis pendulum around in my
face and I'm like, oh myGod, what did I sign up for?
(00:54):
Like, I do weird stuff allthe time, but like this
is like topping the list.
I was gonna
Julia Salvia (00:59):
be like, that's next level.
Like, first you're telling methere's an elf in my uterus.
You're telling me it's.
Called a gin.
Yeah, and then you'rewaving a magnet around me.
nikki grebel (01:07):
Yeah, you're just like waving this
magnet around me And thenthough I felt a chill.
No, you didn't.
Yeah I felt this like chillfrom like I would say my
hips to my head and likethis like whoosh feeling Wow,
Julia Salvia (01:22):
okay, and
nikki grebel (01:23):
as it happened she was trembling She was
like and if the whoosh andthe chill didn't happen.
I'd be like Again, whatdid I fucking sign up for?
Julia Salvia (01:32):
Yeah, you'd be like, what did you bestow on me?
Yeah, I
nikki grebel (01:35):
don't, I have questions.
Like, what did Iget myself into now?
But, like, feeling that andthen her, like, trembling and
she said, did you feel that?
I was like, actually, yes.
She's like, well, it's gone.
It's cleared.
Where did it go?
I don't know.
That's my, that's my question.
Out of my head?
Okay, where did it go?
Like, out of my head somehow?
(01:55):
I don't
Julia Salvia (01:55):
know.
Personally, I believein all of this.
This energy healingstuff and like, intuitive
ability and whatnot.
But I agree with you.
If I didn't feel, if Iwas in your place and I
didn't feel that chill,
nikki grebel (02:07):
I
Julia Salvia (02:07):
would first confirm like, am I, am I cold?
Yeah.
Or am I actually feelingwhat I'm feeling?
Yeah.
I think that there's just that,um, what's the word for it?
Just questioning everything.
Yeah.
Going into this stuff,but I feel like doing that
makes me trust it moreif something does happen.
nikki grebel (02:27):
Oh, yeah.
It's like being open
Julia Salvia (02:29):
to it, but still questioning everything.
nikki grebel (02:30):
Yeah, I mean, I still, listen, like I said, I do
weird woo woo shit all the time.
Julia Salvia (02:36):
Mm hmm.
nikki grebel (02:36):
And I was in there and I was like, I'm
gonna give this my all andthen she's waving this magnet
around telling me there'san L for my uterus and I'm
like, I gotta, I gotta go.
Like, I don't,
Julia Salvia (02:46):
I don't, I don't know.
But no,
nikki grebel (02:48):
it was great.
Have you ever done
Julia Salvi (02:49):
anything like that?
No.
I have not personally.
I mean, I can read, like,psychically, like, for other
people, which is really cool,um, and people have read for me,
but nothing, I don't think thatthere's anything attached to me.
But sometimes I question ifsomething's, like, following me.
(03:10):
Okay.
Oh, that's like, that's
nikki grebel (03:13):
like a whole thing.
I mean, you mean likean energy following you?
Julia Salvia (03:18):
Yes, but I'm pretty positive that it's
like my, um, like my grandma.
nikki grebel (03:23):
Yeah.
Julia Salvia (03:23):
Like I don't think that it's an
energy that I don't know.
nikki grebel (03:28):
Yeah, like nothing dark or like mysterious.
Yeah, but did you feel
Julia Salvia (03:31):
like there was something before this?
Cause what, what brought youto going to an energy killer?
Cause that's I guess the,that's the real question.
nikki grebel (03:39):
Um, cause something must have been up.
Well, I was just havinga string of bad luck.
Julia Salvia (03:43):
Yeah.
nikki grebel (03:44):
I was kneeling down one day, tore my
meniscus, had to get surgery.
Um, I had been doing physicaltherapy for months, graduated
physical therapy, and thenext day got into a bad car
accident, like, got messed up.
Literally
Julia Salvia (03:58):
the next day.
The
nikki grebel (03:59):
next day.
And my acupuncturist was like,This, whatever's happening to
you, does not belong to you.
Like, please go get seen.
Julia Salvia (04:08):
Yeah.
nikki grebel (04:08):
And I went to see this energy healer, she was in
my acupuncturist's office, andshe cleared the evil elf and
apparently seven other energiesthat were attached to me.
Yeah.
So the
Julia Salvia (04:21):
evil elf, elf plus it's posse is seven.
Yeah, like Kate
nikki grebel (04:24):
plus eight.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Nikki, Nikki plus eight.
Exactly.
Me and my eight dark energies.
You and your dark energies.
And the head elf.
Julia Salvia (04:36):
I just picture them all as like little elves.
nikki grebel (04:38):
I know, like cute ones.
And the head elf
Julia Salvia (04:39):
in the uterus.
nikki grebel (04:40):
Yes! Yeah, so she cleared those
energies, but she saidalso like, you know, she's
like, you're a hairdresser,you work with people, like
that's a normal thing.
And I do feel like that happenswhen you're working on people
so closely and having intimateconversations with them.
Oh, I'm
Julia Salvia (04:55):
sure.
Oh yeah.
And we talk about.
Everything under the sun.
nikki grebel (04:59):
Literally.
And I don't
Julia Salvia (05:00):
know how, because we're half doing
it over a blow dryer.
I know! We're like, let meSo what's your PTSD?
nikki grebel (05:14):
Yeah, exactly.
Julia Salvia (05:15):
What happened when you were seven?
Exactly.
It's, I think, theway that women bond.
Oh yeah.
It has to be.
And I'm sure that, doyou believe that it
happens a lot like that?
Yeah.
In like, This space we'resitting in your salon right now.
Oh, yeahWelcome back to the self
(05:41):
love archives of podcast.
I'm your host Julia Salvia alsoknown as your self love Bestie.
Hi besties.
Welcome back or welcome ifyou are a new listener here
I'm so excited for you tohear this episode I'm chatting
with not only one of my goodfriends, but also The talent
(06:05):
the artistry behind thisgorgeous hair of mine And that
is Nikki Grebel the owner ofWillow and Jade hair salon
in Belmar, New Jersey I knowyou've already heard a little
bit about our conversationabout energies and What does
that have to do with self love?
Well, you are going to findout in the rest of the episode.
(06:28):
So keep on listeningand I hope you enjoy
nikki grebel (06:32):
Yeah, this place, especially, I think
just opens people up.
They feel comfortable, first ofall, but I don't know, I think
there's something energeticallyabout this space that makes
people feel like safe and likeable to be seen and heard.
And I tell my girls all thetime, the ones, the young ones.
(06:55):
The young stylists who areafraid to talk to people.
I'm like, talk to them becauseyou have no idea how cool
your clients probably are.
Julia Salvia (07:02):
Oh yeah.
nikki grebel (07:03):
Like, imagine I never talked
to you, that'd be crazy.
Julia Salvia (07:06):
I know, how sad it would be if I
didn't get to know you.
We wouldn't be sitting here!That's what I'm saying! Hahaha!
But, so, your name is Nikki.
nikki grebel (07:15):
Sure is.
And you own?
Willow and Jade, right here.
In Belmar, New Jersey.
We're a hair salon,first and foremost.
But we do bridal makeup andstyling and stuff like that.
Um, we have Styliststhat specialize in pretty
much any hair type here.
Julia Salvia (07:31):
I mean, I've seen some of the crazy work that you
guys can do here is it's insane.
It's like I feel like I'm justlike on that level of very basic
And I and like but the fact thatthat can be done so well and
then to see some of the crazylike artistic work On someone's
head that people can do here.
Oh, yeah, I look at it the um,the one that was like neopolis
(07:56):
and ice cream Oh, yeah, thatwas sick or the calico cat.
nikki grebel (07:59):
Yep.
Yeah.
Jules does some crazycolor work It's artistry.
Honestly,
Julia Salvi (08:04):
really it's insane.
nikki grebel (08:05):
Yeah,
Julia Salvia (08:06):
and i've never seen anything like it.
nikki grebel (08:08):
Oh, yeah, it's beautiful It's awesome because
we selected We hired everyonefor culture, so we wanted
everyone to give that feelof we care about our clients.
It's not just about them.
Julia Salvia (08:20):
Yeah,
nikki grebel (08:20):
so like they're delivering amazing work
like that, but they're alsomaking the client feel like
they have an experience.
Julia Salvia (08:26):
Of course.
Yeah, which is so important.
I think in any in any business,but I think most especially
like the salon hairstylingbusiness because there's some
there's just some bad Repgoing on with like hair salons.
I guess more internallylike I haven't experienced
it As a, actually,whoa, I take that back.
No way.
I was going tosay, and not here.
(08:47):
Definitely not here.
Oh, thank God.
Because I do get my hairdone at Willow and Jamie.
With Nikki.
Yes.
Um, absolutely no bad energy.
Every time I come here,like, I'm excited to show up.
I'm excited to chat.
Like, I'm excited tojust have a girl's time.
Oh,
nikki grebel (09:01):
please.
Everyone
Julia Salvia (09:02):
sees your name in
nikki grebel (09:02):
the book and they're like, Julia's coming in.
Aw,
Julia Salvia (09:05):
they're so cute.
I, I even like, I'm like, hi,this is, we know who we are.
Exactly.
Like, you answered thephone that one time, you're
like, we have caller ID.
Yeah, I know who you are.
I'm working the front today,I see that you're calling.
Yeah.
But, um, in other places, I'vedefinitely, um, heard from other
(09:25):
people how bad sometimes theatmosphere can be in salons.
And, I think that'sso amazing that you
really built this place.
On the premise of not justhaving people who are skilled
to do the work, but creatingthe atmosphere of people to.
Create a betteratmosphere for clients.
Oh, that's so importantThat's how I hire to
(09:47):
like or how I choose tohave people on my team.
You give me a badfeeling I don't want you.
nikki grebel (09:51):
Yeah.
Oh, yeah the hiring.
I'm gonna listen.
It's crazy.
Yeah, I'm gonna listen my gutYeah, exactly And now that we
have like a team that knowsthe drill and they're like we
know how we have to show upif we're Hiring anyone else
we're doing working interviewsand they have to be around the
team and the team will tellus Yeah, you know we had one
girl she was in for two hours,and they were like, we don't
(10:13):
know if it's a good fit, and Iwas like, alright, she's out.
I trust you guys, you know?
Yeah,
Julia Salvia (10:16):
that's so good.
I think, of course, and tofeel like you can build that
trust with people, like as ifthey're, you know, they have
the respect for you as a boss,but also that you're a friend
and that they can come toyou, I feel like creates such
a safe work environment too.
Yeah.
Which is so missing andso, Many workplaces.
nikki grebel (10:36):
Yeah,
Julia Salvia (10:36):
it's so important
nikki grebel (10:37):
that took a while for us to really figure that out
Julia Salvia (10:40):
Yeah,
nikki grebel (10:41):
because we started the salon In 2022, a lot of
our friends came to work forus, and I'd been managing the
salon we were at in the past,but it's different when you own.
Julia Salvia (10:51):
Oh, of course.
nikki grebel (10:52):
Yeah.
So, our friends came, they'relike, yeah, we're gonna be
doing hair with our friends!And we're like, actually,
like, we have boundariesand standards, you know?
Yeah.
You know, there was alot to navigate there.
And then we were like, Oh myGod, we have a team of, I think
the highest number we had atone time was there were 17 of
Julia Salvia (11:12):
us
nikki grebel (11:12):
and we were like, how do we give everyone
individual attention?
Julia Salvia (11:16):
Cause that's a lot of people.
nikki grebel (11:16):
Yeah.
So then we startedhaving like one on one
meetings with them weekly.
That was too much.
And they were also like.
They thought they weregetting, like, fired
every time we were like,
Julia Salvia (11:26):
Hey, come talk to us in the office!
We're like, no, we just wantto make sure that we have,
like, set time for you.
Yeah, and I'm
nikki grebel (11:31):
like, I just want to make sure you're
mentally, like, okay, actually.
You're not getting fired at all.
It's, like, quite the opposite.
But, like,
Julia Salvia (11:37):
wouldn't that right there kind of set
off some, like, red flagsthat their work environment
wasn't great in the past?
Yeah.
Or that people have thisidea of this unsafe.
Or, like, lack of communicationtype of, like, work environment.
Yeah.
Cause it's crazy to think that,oh, you're going into a meeting
with your boss and, like, thefirst thing you think of is,
(11:57):
oh, shit, I'm getting fired.
Yeah.
nikki grebel (11:58):
That's so sad.
I know.
I mean, I think if the roleswere reversed and, like,
I was in the space that Ihad been in in the past, I
would be like, oh my god,yeah, I am getting fired.
We're
Julia Salvia (12:07):
100 percent doing the same thing, you know?
Why do you
nikki grebel (12:09):
care?
Yeah.
Julia Salvia (12:12):
Why are you giving a shit?
Yeah, exactly.
nikki grebel (12:15):
But that's, I think, what changes the game
for small business owners.
Oh, yeah.
Is like, yeah, youare a small business.
You have employees thatare from all walks of life.
What are they going through?
How can you support them?
Especially in an industrylike this where we're
really trying to build ourstylists up and there's a
lot of training involved.
(12:36):
It's very special in that case.
But, yeah, I mean, doingthose check ins though changed
the game, and that's whatreally tightened the team.
Julia Salvia (12:46):
Yeah, I think there's a fine line
between being a boss andbeing a friend, but I really
think that there needs tobe a little bit of both.
Yeah.
But I think what comesin between that is
setting boundariesand respect and trust.
Being communicative,like, on both ends.
Oh, yeah.
On, you know, the person whoThe employer and the employee,
(13:09):
like, so incredibly importantto actually make, like, the
workspace run efficiently andgive the place the atmosphere
that you want it to have,the welcoming, safe space.
A thousand percent.
And I think you guysare definitely doing it.
For sure.
Thank you.
Especially now thatthat little elf is gone.
You could do it tenfold.
nikki grebel (13:26):
Oh.
Honestly, yes.
Thank God the elf is gone.
I kind of miss him.
I wish I had more timewhere I knew about him.
Oh my goodness.
Julia Salvia (13:34):
Did you know that, um, so what was the
feeling actually like beforeyou went to the energy healer
that like you, that you felt?
nikki grebel (13:45):
Um, I do attribute part of the feeling to the
car accident I was in becauseI had a concussion that,
like, wrecked me emotionally.
I didn't know thatconcussions did that.
First of all, I thought,like, you got concussions
if you played football andthey lasted three days.
I didn't realize theywere, like, this whole
very serious thing.
Julia Salvia (14:02):
I feel like, I mean, just like, I was
doing some work on, on brainsyesterday, so, like, no
brain surgeon or anything.
I'm, like, What?
I was looking, I was lookingstuff up that was really
interesting that apparently,Your brain, it does not
matter whether you'refeeling emotional pain or
physical pain, your brainprocesses it, processes it?
(14:23):
Processes?
Yeah! The same exact way.
Oh!So your brain processes physical
pain and emotional pain inthe same part of your brain.
So it doesn't really tellthe, you can't really
tell the difference.
Yeah! Or your brain can't reallytell the difference.
nikki grebel (14:37):
Yeah, that's wild actually.
Right?
Yeah! So I'm
Julia Salvia (14:39):
thinking in regards to a concussion, I guess
it would depend where in yourbrain you got the concussion?
nikki grebe (14:45):
Yeah, I don't know.
All I know is that You'refeeling it emotionally?
Oh my god.
Right after the accident,I couldn't stop crying.
Like, I couldn't stop crying.
It was crazy.
My acupunct Freaking shout outto Megan, my acupuncturist.
Honestly, she like called me,she's like, I heard you can't
stop crying, come to my house.
And she's like, I'm justgonna put a bunch of
needles in your head.
(15:06):
And I was like, okay, andI'm like crying on this
table, this acupuncturetable in her basement.
Like still consistently crying.
Like physically could
Julia Salvia (15:13):
not stop crying.
nikki grebel (15:14):
Yeah.
It was hard to work.
I had to like keep it in.
It was crazy.
I was emotional at all times.
And I. I wouldn't have
Julia Salvia (15:22):
worn makeup for any of those days.
No,
nikki grebel (15:25):
there
Julia Salvia (15:26):
was no
nikki grebel (15:26):
mascara
Julia Salvia (15:27):
to be had.
I actually didn'twear mascara today.
I forgot, but we'll sayit's because just in case
I have like a little happy
nikki grebel (15:33):
cry
Julia Salvia (15:33):
with you.
Perfect.
nikki grebel (15:36):
Yeah, so I feel like I was in
this like depression,like a funk after that.
And I was also just like stuckin this cycle of bad things
are always happening to me.
Like I just had thisknee surgery, which.
I know that wasn't the case.
Like, I had the kneesurgery, and I was freaking
out that I couldn't work.
The salon did better when Iwasn't here, which Was very
(15:57):
fucking humbling, but I waslike, that's a little humbling.
I know, I was like, damn.
Maybe they're like, we want toimpress her while she's gone.
Yeah, I was like, it'sall actually because they
really wanted to work extrahard because I wasn't here.
But then like, this caraccident happened, and my
jeep, which I like attachedso much love to this material
object, I loved my jeep.
Was totaled, you know, andthen I was also like, you
(16:19):
know, I have no control.
I was hit from behind, therewas nothing I could have done.
So I was likespiraling constantly.
And then, I'm not gonna saythe elf being removed from my
body is what really changedeverything, but I did start to
feel this sense of lightness.
Julia Salvia (16:35):
Yeah.
nikki grebel (16:36):
And maybe it was a placebo thing, and I just
needed to change my mentality.
I
Julia Salvia (16:40):
was just gonna say that.
I sometimes think that For thisis like for the people who don't
believe in energy that don'tbelieve in intuitive ability
that don't believe in psychicability Whatever whatever yeah,
this is for those people thatdon't believe in that I really
think that sometimes the thereI mean there's scientific
proof about placebo effect.
Mm hmm that if we believesomething has been Magically
(17:03):
removed from us and we genuinelybelieve that that we can
actually start like this pathto healing Yeah, so If you
don't believe in energy, like, Idon't know, believe, like, maybe
believe it just to help youget on the right path forward.
Oh, yeah.
Because I'm sure in that momentyou're like, okay, well this
little elf is gone, poof, bye.
(17:23):
But you still are doingwhat you need to do to
help your body physically,help yourself mentally.
Exactly.
To move
nikki grebel (17:31):
forward.
Yeah.
I had, I actually had anotherplacebo thing happen last year.
Mm
Julia Salvia (17:39):
hmm.
nikki grebel (17:40):
That my friend Steph kept bringing up.
Julia Salvia (17:43):
Mm hmm.
nikki grebel (17:43):
Um, I had to get a crown put in my, one of my
teeth, like an on lay crown.
Julia Salvia (17:49):
Yeah.
nikki grebel (17:50):
And, the dentist came out and he's
like, oh, the lab made amistake, this crown is gold.
And I was like, okay, Imean, it's my back molar.
I guess I don't care, but like,I'm going to have a gold tooth.
Like, that's crazy.
Julia Salvia (18:04):
Yeah.
nikki grebel (18:06):
Yeah.
Like what?
I was like, who do I think I am?
I mean, give me thegold tooth though.
Cause I'm not comingback for this.
Like, this is crazy.
So I have a gold online crownin the back of my mouth.
And when I got it, I waslike, Oh my God, I think
that this gold crown ismaking me very abundant.
Like I was like, I gotlike a check in the mail
for like a hundred dollarsfor like no reason.
Like.
(18:26):
All of these deals werehappening for me in my
favor and I was like, Ohmy God, my gold tooth is
just making me abundant.
And I believed that forlike probably a year and
I was like, all of thesegood things are happening,
but it's not that I have agold tooth and that that's
making me lucky or abundant.
It's that I have the beliefthat I am now abundant.
Julia Salvia (18:50):
It's true.
nikki grebel (18:51):
Exactly.
But
Julia Salvia (18:52):
I feel like I don't, it's
like, I don't want to.
Disregard the feeling thatsomething can give you or the
truth behind like an energyBut if it's gonna give you And
affect the way like a placeboeffect would or like, yeah,
those books like the power ofnow and things like that I think
our mindsets are so incrediblyimportant to help like push us
(19:15):
forward that like yeah Fuck.
Yeah, the gold tooth gaveyou some abundance exactly.
Yeah,
nikki grebel (19:20):
because it couldn't be me.
It would have to besomething external I
Julia Salvia (19:23):
think we're so hard on ourselves too
in that way where we thinkthat it has to be something
else It can't just be us.
Yep.
It can't just be That, thatwe're putting in the work,
that we're doing, like,all the, like, doing all
the things that we need to,to push ourselves forward.
It has to be the gold tooth.
nikki grebel (19:38):
Yeah.
It has to be theremoval of the elf.
Exactly.
I was talking to my friendStephanie about it because I
also So, your listeners aregoing to think I'm crazy, but
a month ago, I was driving inmy now new car and I'm driving
behind this big truck and ithas a like bobcat, like one of
(20:01):
those, I don't know, like oneof those big machines, not a
crane, but one of those guys.
Um, it has a bobcat sticking outat the top and I'm behind it and
it's going under an overpass.
Julia Salvia (20:11):
Oh my god.
nikki grebel (20:13):
Let me hold on to my seat for this story.
Yeah, so.
Obviously you're here,so I know you're fine.
Uh huh.
Continue.
Um, it hit the overpass andchunks of cement came down.
And of course, me, drivinglike an idiot, I'm like kind
of riding this guy's ass.
I should not have been doing it.
Julia Salvia (20:31):
It's fine.
nikki grebel (20:31):
I swerved out of the way.
I was okay.
Julia Salvia (20:34):
But.
Is your car fine?
nikki grebel (20:35):
My car is fine.
Julia Salvia (20:36):
Wow, okay.
nikki grebel (20:37):
But like these giant chunks of cement
would have hit my car.
And I would have literallybeen final destination.
And when it didn't happen.
Great, while you'resitting here.
Yes.
Wow.
When it didn't happen, I textedmy friend Steph and I was
like, Oh my God, Steph, like.
This just happened.
Can you believe that?
Do you think I'm cursed?
(20:57):
And she's like, Nikki,first of all, you're not
fucking cursed up saying it.
And she's like, youare divinely protected.
She's like, you thought itwas your gold tooth last year.
She's like, it's you.
It's not yourfucking gold tooth.
Stop trying to think thatyou need external things to
validate you when it's just you,you, as you are like you as.
(21:19):
You are as a human being.
Yeah,
Julia Salvia (21:21):
and I think everybody needs to
start to realize that.
But if we have to use theselittle external things,
like a gold tooth, a littlelove, like, that's fine.
Do it.
I used to actually use, um,in relationships, I used
to use my future daughter.
As my, like, little, Iguess, placebo in a way.
I love that.
Cause I'm like, I know,I think there's every
(21:43):
part of me, I think I'mjust, I'm just funny now.
Um, cause I'm, I, I don'tlike when people kind of
make the assumption that,Oh, you'll have kids one day.
Cause no, that's my choice.
I could decide tomorrow Idon't want to have kids.
But I think, withinme, I know I will.
Um, how that plays out, whenthat plays out, I don't know.
And I'm not worried about it.
(22:04):
Um, I just let, letit go as it, as it is.
But, I know that I'mgoing to have a daughter.
And I always use her asmy, If, if I have a moment
where I don't feel goodenough, or worthy enough of a
situation that's not so good.
I ask myself the question,would you allow this to happen
(22:25):
to your future daughter?
nikki grebel (22:27):
Okay.
That's crazy.
Cause I literally starteddoing that this week.
No! I'm like, I'm gonna have adaughter and would I allow
this treatment of her?
Would I let my daughter talkto herself the way that I'm
talking to myself right now?
How do I need to be for myfuture daughter so that I can
raise someone who's strong?
(22:48):
That's so crazy.
Julia Salvia (22:50):
I am over the moon.
I am so excited to tell youall about bloom An immersive
self love experience.
This is my event.
This is our event.
This is the self love archivesIRL in real life, self love
(23:10):
event coming to central NewJersey in 2025, this September
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attendees that are goingto be in this one space.
Wanting to love themselves more.
(23:31):
They're there with that sameidea, that same purpose of
wanting to love themselves more.
I created Bloom because Iwanted there to be an immersive
experience where you haveall of the little things that
you do for yourself to loveyourself more, all in one space.
(23:51):
So I'm talking, grabbing yourfavorite book, planning a
little hangout with your girls.
Getting some flowers foryourself, having a little
bite to eat, just being in aspace that is creative, that
is aesthetic, that is fun.
Basically, it's a self loveexpo, with a little twist,
because we like to keepthings aesthetic, we like
(24:13):
to keep things comfortable,we like to keep things
welcoming at Bloom events.
And there's really onlyone thing that I have
to tell you about Bloom.
It's that you deservea day like this.
So why not come?
So why not spend a dayloving yourself more?
(24:38):
Pre sale tickets are availableon our website right now, but
get them fast because thereare only a certain amount of
pre sale tickets available.
So I hope you'll grab a ticket.
I hope to see you there.
And I absolutely cannot waitto bloom together in 2025.
(24:59):
So I want to go back to,um, You starting to think of
like your future daughter.
nikki grebel (25:05):
I think of it as like, inspiration for
how I'm treating myself.
Yes,
Julia Salvia (25:11):
because I think we always look at, um,
I think some people use itas their friends or their
sister or their best friend.
Um, you know, asking thequestion, If someone's
treating you badly, wouldyou allow the way that you're
being treated, in whateverway you're being treated?
For someone to treatsomeone you love that way.
Exactly.
Because sometimes we putourselves so low that we don't
(25:35):
put ourselves at the samevalue as the people we love.
Yep.
Because we see them as so high.
You know, not that they'relike better than us or anything
like that, but we just seethem as so valuable in our
lives that we look at theirvalue higher than our own.
Oh yeah.
So, that's such a strongquestion, if, to like self
reflect on that, especiallyif you're getting that gut
(25:57):
feeling of like, am I beingtreated the right way?
Is this okay?
Oh yeah.
If you can stop for asecond and ask yourself that
question, I think it couldpotentially change your life.
It's powerful.
Oh yeah.
nikki grebel (26:08):
It's so powerful.
And you know what?
A lot of it came from thinkingabout the conversations
I have with clients here.
I have a lot of clientswho are moms, you know,
their daughters are.
Oh my god, their daughtersare getting older.
I've been doing their hairsince the daughters were babies.
Julia Salvia (26:24):
That's crazy.
nikki grebel (26:25):
Yeah, um, I have one client in particular,
and she knows that I'mgonna call her out on this.
I love her very much, but shePicks herself apart every time
she sits in front of the mirror.
Julia Salvia (26:39):
Hmm.
nikki grebel (26:40):
She is, she's a beautiful woman inside and out,
Julia Salvia (26:43):
but she's
nikki gre (26:43):
calling herself ugly.
She would never dare saythis about anyone else.
She's ugly, she callsherself fat, she's
saying all these things.
She brings her daughterto her appointments.
She's looking at herselfin the mirror and her
daughter's sitting rightnext to her watching this.
Julia Salvia (26:55):
Ugh.
nikki grebel (26:57):
And her daughter started saying, Mom, like,
I'm, I need to lose weight.
The daughter's 12.
Julia Salvia (27:03):
Gut wrench.
Gut wrench.
nikki grebel (27:05):
And.
Her daughter goes to thebathroom at that, like a
couple of minutes later.
And her mom, the mom says,can you believe she says
she needs to lose weight?
She's beautiful.
Like she doesn't needto, you know, and she's
perfect the way she is.
And I had to say, and I don'tlike interjecting, but I felt
like I've been like, I'vebeen known this family for 10
(27:27):
years, clients end up becomingfamily with us a lot of times.
And I said, and I had todo this for her daughter.
And I said, do you think.
That she's learningthis behavior from you.
And I probably could havestructured the question
better, because I wasbasically like, you're wrong.
Julia Salvia (27:48):
Sometimes I think people need to hear it
like straight forward, likeshe probably isn't even aware
nikki grebel (27:53):
of the
Julia Salvia (27:53):
effect that, of how she treats herself can
have an effect on her daughter.
nikki grebel (27:58):
Yeah, so she said, what do you mean?
I said, well I just watched you.
Destroy yourself in the mirror.
You just picked every aspectof your appearance apart.
You know?
And she was, like,taking it back.
She didn't even realizeshe was doing it.
Julia Salvia (28:20):
Yeah, I think it's like a subconscious thing
that we do not even realize.
Yeah!And it's scary because when it's
So sub, like in our conscious,like in, in our subconscious
that we are doing it like that.
We don't even realize theeffect that has on ourselves.
Yeah.
But especially other peopleand especially the people that
are, you know, we're supposedto be the, like, leader
(28:43):
for, like the, for our kids.
Like.
Exactly.
That's crazy.
nikki grebel (28:47):
Yeah.
So after seeing that, you know.
Um, I thought about myfuture, like I want to
have a baby one day.
I do always have this visionthat I'm going to have
a daughter and, uh, likeit would be a crime if my
husband was not a girl dad.
Julia Salvia (29:05):
He was like, I say the same thing to him.
Really?
I would love to have likea boy to like, I would
love to just a girl, a boy.
I think most people kind offeel that way, but yeah, I
feel like it would heal justlike our Like both of our
inner, inner childs to haverepre like, not someone, but
like a, our kid, like to havea representation of like us.
(29:25):
Yeah,
nikki grebel (29:26):
and just to maybe try to do it a
little better this timearound than what we had.
Julia Salvia (29:31):
Oh yeah.
Your inner child.
Mm hmm.
Cause I'm sure that yousee yourself within your,
your daughter as likea, you know, your child.
Yeah.
Where do you see, what partsof yourself do you see in her?
nikki grebel (29:46):
I would say strength, determination,
like, I, we've talkedabout this obviously, but
for those who don't know,I had a rough upbringing.
There was a lot of physicaland emotional abuse.
And one thing that I pridemyself on is the strength that
(30:07):
it took to get out of that.
Julia Salvia (30:08):
Yeah.
nikki grebel (30:09):
So yeah, so I had an interesting childhood.
Mm hmm.
She was very trying.
Julia Salvia (30:17):
Mm hmm.
nikki grebel (30:18):
Um, and I feel like, for the long time
actually, I didn't want kids.
Because I was like, whatdid I have to learn?
Like, what did I have, who didI have to teach me how to be?
Someone's guide andsomeone's leader.
You know?
And as time went on and Istarted actually becoming a
leader in my own business andin other people's businesses, I
(30:38):
realized, like, I think that my,what I perceived as my weakness
is going to be my strength.
Julia Salvia (30:47):
Mm hmm.
nikki grebel (30:48):
Like, knowing all of the things that have
gone wrong are going tohelp me in the long run.
Julia Salvia (30:54):
You know, there's a point in astrology
that literally is that.
nikki grebel (30:57):
What do you mean?
It's
Julia Salvia (30:58):
called, it's called Chiron.
And it's your painand your healing.
So it's where you have pain andit's where you find healing.
Interesting.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's a really, it's areally cool point and I, I
don't think that it gets.
enough knowledge.
No.
Or like, it doesn't gettalked about enough.
nikki grebel (31:13):
Yeah, no.
But it's
Julia Salvia (31:14):
so interesting.
Especially when youread someone's chart
and you look for that.
I'm like, oh shit, Iknow your entire life.
nikki grebel (31:20):
Really?
Oh yeah.
Oh my god.
Like, if
Julia Salvia (31:22):
you have Chiron in the 8th house, um, the
8th house is like debts,inheritance, um, taxes.
Uh huh.
It's like, a veryinteresting house.
Yeah.
But it mostly has to dowith money you can't see.
Interesting.
And if you have Chiron there,my first assumption is,
you most likely have Somestruggle with either things
(31:43):
that you have inherited.
nikki grebel (31:45):
Okay.
Julia Salvia (31:46):
Maybe you have a difficulty with, um, like you're
in massive amounts of debt.
nikki grebel (31:51):
Okay.
Julia Salvia (31:52):
But that's your learning, essentially.
Like that's where you're goingto learn a lot about yourself.
And if you can push throughthat pain that you have
in that area of your life,you can find healing.
nikki grebel (32:04):
Interesting.
Yeah.
We have to see where yours is.
I know.
I'm like, are we goingto also do like a birth
chart thing later?
Is your phone in the back?
Uh, I could turn it on.
But yeah, I actually like,I thought about this a lot
actually when you askedme to be on the podcast.
Like when I was like, Oh,what are we talking about?
(32:26):
Like business?
And you're like, no Nikki,my podcast is actually called
the self love archives.
Like.
It's about self love and I waslike, I was like taken aback.
I was like, what does she mean?
I can't talk aboutloving myself.
Julia Salvia (32:37):
Yes, you can.
nikki grebel (32:38):
Yes, I can.
But I had to think about itbecause I just I guess I never
put intentional thought to it.
Mm
Julia Salvia (32:43):
hmm,
nikki grebel (32:44):
and I was like, wow, I guess I really friggin
hate myself like what the helland then I realized like no The
things that I've done to showself love are just a little
unconventional to other people.
So having this difficultupbringing Um I didn't really
have boundaries with anyone.
(33:05):
I didn't show myself thatrespect like you would want
your daughter to show herself.
Um, and when I turned 28,yeah, when I was 28, I cut my
whole family out of my life.
Julia Salvia (33:19):
Funny.
nikki grebel (33:21):
Is that,
Julia Salvia (33:22):
what?
It's another astrology thing.
nikki grebel (33:24):
Is this my Saturn return?
Julia Salvia (33:26):
And
nikki grebel (33:27):
do you know what, do
Julia Salvia (33:27):
you know what a Saturn return
means, essentially?
Usually like trialsand tribulations.
Boundaries.
Ugh, boundaries.
The most.
Significant parts of someone'slife, like, you know, those
parts of our lives that wealways think about are so
big, like, we get, when weget married, when we break
up with someone, when someonepasses away, when we cut people
(33:49):
out of our lives, when weget a new job, or we lose a
job, like, huge things happenaround our Saturn return, and
28 to like 30 is when we gothrough our Saturn return.
It depends, of course, like,you know, some specifics,
but our Saturn return isabout two and a half years.
That is wild.
If you ask anybody, whathappened when you were 28 to 30?
What big thingshappened in your life?
(34:11):
Yeah.
And I could, I couldname some for anybody.
Like someone That's crazy.
Me?
My dad died.
nikki grebel (34:18):
Yeah.
Julia Salvia (34:20):
Then you have my boyfriend got a new job.
nikki grebel (34:23):
Yeah, like all these crazy big things.
Nikki?
Cut her whole familyout of her life.
Cut my whole familyout of my life.
My dad died, I opened a salon.
That's insane.
Yeah.
Well that was like 28 to 31.
Julia Salvia (34:37):
Still.
nikki grebel (34:38):
Yeah.
Still
Julia Salvia (34:39):
like all a part of it in like the bigger picture.
And now.
That's crazy.
You're past your Saturn return.
nikki grebel (34:44):
Yeah.
Julia Salvia (34:44):
How
nikki grebel (34:44):
does that feel?
I don't fucking know.
I'm getting evil elves extractedout of my body right now.
Julia Salvia (34:53):
But it's crazy looking back on, on these
parts of our, ourselves.
In that self love journey ofyours to be like, oh shit.
Yeah.
Wow.
Okay Look at all these thingsthat I went through and look
at who I am today And maybeyou're still in a place where
you need growth in some spotsin some places I mean, we're
always gonna be constantlygrowing but to see where you
(35:14):
came from Where that sevenyear old Nikki came from is so
wild, and I'm so proud of you.
Thank you.
Of course.
I'm proud of you.
No, no, no.
I'm proud of you.
This podcast isn'tabout me today.
It's about you.
No, you hang up first.
nikki grebel (35:25):
No,
Julia Salvia (35:26):
you hang up.
No,
nikki grebel (35:28):
you hang up.
Yeah.
No, it is absolutely insane,but also I want to thank you
for even, for inviting meonto this because honestly, I
needed to have those thoughtsand to really like analyze.
Why it felt so uncomfortablefor me to be like, I'm gonna
talk about loving myself.
What the hell.
How do I get out of this?
(35:49):
No, I was
Julia Salvia (35:53):
like,
nikki grebel (35:53):
I'm doing uncomfortable things
because I need to grow
Julia Salvia (35:57):
That's what it is.
I mean uncomfortable thingsare what what help us
grow and um a self lovejourney Is our entire life.
Yes.
It's not like a moment or maybethere are some moments that like
stick out But it's our entirelife and yeah That's gonna be
like really uncomfortable tosay to look at ourselves in the
mirror Like I hope that clientof yours does and say I love
(36:17):
myself Mm hmm takes a lot andsometimes you probably won't
believe yourself, but yeah,it takes a lot to actually
say it do it Be about it.
Choose it.
Absolutely.
All of the above.
nikki grebel (36:27):
And I think that there is something to
be said about the idea thatit can be easier for you to
do it if you're like, Oh, I'mnot just doing this for me.
I'm doing this formy future daughter.
Julia Salvia (36:39):
Yeah.
nikki grebel (36:40):
I'm doing this for people who are looking that
I might not even be aware of.
People I'm inspiringthat I'm not aware of.
I mean, I think the one battleis to really get it to the
point where you're like, no, I'mactually doing this for myself.
I
Julia Salvia (36:55):
think it's a good start.
It's like doing it for someoneelse, especially if we're in
a place where we don't feelso great or we're in a really
tough spot, like we're in anabusive relationship or we're
in a relationship with a friendthat is really Discouraging
and yeah, if or if we're in aplace mentally where we just
(37:15):
don't feel good about who weare sometimes having that little
bit of a crutch to use someoneor something else that means a
lot to us as the First step intoour journey of loving ourselves.
It can be So helpful.
Yeah.
But of course it'sa self love journey.
It's about the self.
If we can come back torealizing that we're really
(37:38):
doing this for us, because ifwe love ourselves, everyone
will, you know, flock tous in the ways that they're
supposed to be in our lives.
Yeah.
We'll have greatrelationships around us.
We'll have greatpeople around us.
We'll have great thingsaround us because we decided
to say, no, I'm goingto, I'm going to love me.
Yeah.
(37:59):
So that I can love you.
nikki grebel (38:01):
That was a fucking mic drop moment, sister.
I don't
Julia Salvia (38:04):
want to drop this.
nikki grebel (38:07):
Yeah, don't drop the new mic, but
Julia Salvia (38:11):
But it's so true.
And what, what do you thinkabout your, to kind of like
bring this all full circle.
Like we're in an email, butit's my favorite saying,
bring this full circle.
What would you say is thebiggest part of your self
love journey that got you,what's the biggest thing that
got you from You know, sincewe're on seven year old Nikki.
(38:31):
Yeah.
From seven year oldNikki to who Nikki
nikki grebel (38:34):
is today.
I think it's taking the timeto honor and reflect on the
difficult things that I've done.
Mm hmm.
And the way that I've kindof gone against the odds.
Like, the way that I was raised,I don't think a lot of people
(38:55):
would have been able to handle.
Julia Salvia (38:57):
I
nikki grebel (38:57):
have two sisters, and they're, you know, my
younger sister, she's tryingher hardest to do okay.
She's starting her own journey,and you know, healing from our
childhoods, and she's like,I don't know how you did it.
And I always triedto protect her.
Julia Salvia (39:11):
Yeah.
nikki grebel (39:12):
You know, like, she didn't know that the
craziness was going on, forthe most part, because I was
trying to protect her from it.
Julia Salvia (39:17):
Yeah.
nikki grebel (39:17):
But, I think that allowing myself to
feel proud of who I ambecause of what I've been
through, is the biggest part.
And for a long time, I thoughtthat I was being a pompous
jerk for being like, I'vedone it, I can do this, I
have confidence because I'vegone through worse shit.
(39:39):
But I think stepping into thathas allowed me to become a
better leader, a better wife.
A better friend, abetter communicator,
all of those things.
Julia Salvia (39:49):
Yeah, of course.
I love that so much.
Thank you.
Thank
nikki grebel (39:52):
you.
Thank you for being here.
I appreciate you.
I can't wait to see you againin two days for a blackout.
I know.
I can't wait toget my hair done.
It's gonna be stunning.
Hell yeah.
Thank you.
Thank you.
I really appreciate it.
I love you.
Julia Salvia (40:06):
I love you.
Thank you so much always fortuning in to this episode.
I hope you enjoyed it.
But as much as I enjoyedhaving this conversation with
Nikki, such a sweet, kindsoul, and such an amazing
story, and I hope you feltlike this conversation was
(40:26):
as if you were just in acircle of best friends.
Because that's truly how itfelt editing this video, I felt
like I was taken, I was justlike watching our conversation
on FaceTime all over again.
And I hope you learned alittle bit about yourself
(40:46):
from this episode.
And of course, as always,don't forget to love yourself
a little bit more this week.
I will see you in just twoweeks for our next episode
where we talk all aboutBloom and all of the super
exciting things coming.
Thank you for listening, onceagain, I love you so much.
(41:08):
Have the best week ever,and I'll see you soon.
Bye.
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