June 22, 2025 • 35 mins
not only is part two here of the small things that changed my life, we're on episode 50?! wow. thank you so much for being here.
we're continuing the conversation about the small things that have changed my life- habits, tools, + tiny shifts that have made a big difference in my self-love journey. sometimes the smallest changes create the most impact.
for any purchases i've mentioned, find them here
connect with julia on instagram @beautybyjulia + tik tok @juliasalvia
unlock more archive content on instagram @theselflovearchive + tik tok @theselflovearchives
sign up for the self-love archives newsletter: www.theselflovearchives.com
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Julia Salvia (00:00):
The small things that changed my life
and that are probably gonnachange your life as well.
When we look at the biggerpicture of where we are, I'm
sure that you can pinpointsomething that you purchased,
something that you startedimplementing, something
(00:20):
that you started doing.
Maybe you started listening to.
That absolutely changed yourlife, and maybe it's something
really small, but it's somethingthat made such an impact on
you that you've just keptdoing it, kept purchasing it.
That's what today's episodeis all about, and this
(00:42):
is part two of my series.
The small thingsthat Changed My Life.
Welcome back to theSelf-Love Archives podcast.
(01:03):
I'm your host, Julia Salvia,your self love besie, and I'm
really excited to be back herewith part two of the small
things that changed my life.
I even re-listened to theoriginal episode of the Small
Things That Changed My Life.
It is episode eight.
It was one of the very firstepisodes that I posted here
on the Self-Love Archives.
It's still a reallygreat listen.
(01:24):
I actually need tore-implement some of the
things and repurchasesome of the things that I
talked about in that firstepisode, especially walking.
I feel like wealways lose walking.
When it gets cold in thecolder months because it
just gets a little bitharder to get yourself to
go outside, especially whenit's in a million layers.
(01:46):
But I have some new ones foryou today and I'm super excited
to share them with you becausethey really have, these small
things really have been changingmy life lately, and I hope
that they can change yours.
We're gonna startoff really strong.
Stop.
Giving in to perfectionor whatever you
(02:07):
think perfection is.
Yeah.
This one is a doozy.
This one's a little bit hard.
I have to say that as muchas I truly am aware of this
and do my best to implementthis into every single day
of my life, and just kindof have the saying, like
it's literally like tattooedon the inside of my brain.
(02:30):
Stop trying to be perfect.
As much as I try to, sometimesit is very difficult because
I think we have these societalexpectations of only being
able to do things like, you canonly do this if it's perfect.
You can only love yourselfif you're perfect.
(02:51):
You can only buy that ifit's perfect, or you can only
create that if it's perfect.
You can only announceit if it's perfect.
What is perfect anyway?
Who?
Who coined the term perfect?
Because I wanna have a chat.
We need to talk becausewhat the fuck is perfect?
(03:12):
What does that even mean?
When I started to let goof everything needing to be
perfect, and I'm talking downto the way that I cut the apple
that I eat in the morning.
Have you ever caught yourselfjust feeling like you can't
(03:35):
actually make a move or make adecision because you're waiting
for all of these things toline up all of these things
to be perfect, or you'rewaiting to have a conversation
with someone or reach outbecause you're waiting for
the perfect time, or you'rewaiting for the perfect moment?
How, how silly is that to holdyourself back because you're
(03:58):
waiting for perfection, becauseyou're waiting for something
that doesn't even exist.
There's no such thing asperfect the way that you get
better at something, or theway that you start to perfect
something is you just do it.
Or maybe it doesn'teven really matter.
(04:19):
You know, when I, when Istarted letting that go, or
at least trying my best to,it really changed the way that
I started to make decisionsand it really changed the way
that I would then go on to acton something, especially when
it comes to sharing with youon social media or sharing.
(04:44):
With other people or startinga conversation that might be
hard or doing something thatmaybe I don't know how to do.
It helped build my confidenceand my trust in myself
when I let go of theperfection and just did it.
Small thing, small littlething that changed my life.
(05:08):
Even though this small thing,it feels more like a big thing.
That it does not have tobe perfect to let go of
whatever perfect means orto let go of perfection.
I think that this next one mighttake the cake it, it might take
the cake, gobble it all up, thewhole nine micro boundaries.
(05:35):
Micro boundaries, notthese big boundaries where
you stop talking to thisperson or you cut this
person out of your life.
Micro boundaries.
I started putting myphone on do not disturb.
It's on do not disturb 24 7.
Unless I am fully awarethat I have a call coming
in or that I need torespond to something ASAP.
(05:59):
And even then, that's setup with some boundaries.
My phone's on do not disturb,and that's one of the micro
boundaries that I have myphone's on Do not disturb as to
not disturb me from a creativemoment that I'm having as to
not disturb me from doing thethings that I need to do for me.
(06:23):
So if I'm meditating, whatis the worst thing that could
happen while I'm meditating?
Oh yeah, my phone going off.
So my phone is always on donot disturb, and I stopped
feeling bad about it.
It's really just more of a wayfor me to do the things that
I need to do for me first sothat I can then get back to you
(06:47):
or get back to an email or getback to a notification later.
And to that same point.
Another micro boundary thatI think is so important
that kind of ties in withhaving your phone on do not
disturb, is not feeling theneed to respond to someone or
something as soon as possible.
(07:08):
Some other person's rush,someone else's time management
or lack thereof is not.
Your fault, it's not on you.
Just because they are in a rushfor a response does not dictate
(07:29):
for you to have a response backto their question or to their
email, to their text message.
ASAP, and this is comingfrom the girl that used to
literally answer a text message.
I'd answer you back in seconds.
My phone always literallyright at my face, and that
(07:49):
took me away from doing somany things for myself or
so many things that I hadto get done or had to do.
My answer can wait,my response can wait.
It does not have to be ASAP.
Don't allow someone else's rush.
(08:11):
Make you feel like you needto have the same rush back.
Whatever is yours,will still be yours.
Whatever is meant foryou will still be yours.
Keep that in mind, especiallywhen it comes to those job
interviews or those timeswhere you feel like you need to
respond with a, an answer, ASAP.
(08:34):
You don't.
You can take your time.
You can set thoselittle micro boundaries.
Any micro boundary that is goingto let you keep your peace is
a boundary that you should set.
And you know exactly whichones I'm talking about.
Oh, you guys are gonna be so madat me for this one because this,
(08:57):
a lot of these small thingsthat changed your life are just,
are kind of like Mel Robbins.
Let them theory.
You're reading this book asI was reading Mel Robbins.
Let them theory book, andI'm listening to her podcast
and her auto audio book and,and I'm just hearing her talk
about this and I'm like, well,obviously Mel, like, yeah, I'm
(09:19):
gonna let them and let me, I'mgonna let them say whatever they
want, do whatever they want,choose whatever they want, and
I'm going to then choose anddo whatever I want for myself.
Yeah, of course.
Duh.
The fact that she coined a termfor this allows you to kind
(09:43):
of put all of these actionsinto almost like a category in
your brain to then allow you.
To easily make the choice tolet them, let them say what
they want, let them do whatthey do, let them be who they
want, choose what they want,whatever, and then let me go
(10:04):
do what I need to do for me.
So we could throw that in here.
Um, the small things thatchanged my life, uh, let them,
yeah, that is definitely, thatgoes beyond a micro boundary.
That is a strong.
Realization and boundary thatyou are setting with other
(10:24):
people in order to do whatyou need to do for yourself.
Let them call you 20 times.
Let them text you 20 times.
Let them email you three times,and then you get to choose
what you are going to do next.
What is your next move?
What is the best thing thatyou need to do for you?
(10:46):
At the end of the day, youdon't have control over what
anyone else does, so whatdo you need to do for you?
That brings me to number threeor technically number four,
since that is just such a good.
Term to take with you.
It's another thing to engravein the inside of your brain.
Let them, and let me, numberfour, is be kinder to yourself.
(11:08):
I know, I know.
I know.
This sounds so straightforwardand so simple and so easy, but
when you actually make it apoint to be kinder to yourself,
you allow the opportunity.
To be kinder to your,to yourself, you allow
the opportunity to bekinder to yourself.
(11:30):
You allow the space and theenergy and the awareness,
the self-awareness to catchyourself when you say something
that isn't so kind, whenyou're looking at yourself in
the mirror and you're like,oh, I look so fat today,
and you catch yourself andyou're like, you know what?
No, that's not true.
(11:52):
I look great today.
Maybe I'm not feeling sogreat today, but I look
great today and I am not.
Those things, when you makeit a point to be kinder to
yourself, you make it a pointto be self-aware of how you're
speaking to yourself and howyou are talking to yourself,
(12:12):
and I think that is such asmall change that you can
make, a small intention thatyou can make with yourself.
To change how you feel aboutyourself day in and day out.
Let's get into thefun ones, shall we?
(12:33):
Some things that havechanged my life, Ugh.
If you know melistening to calm music.
Jazz music, piano music,music with no sound.
Some people like lo-fi,some people like jazz.
During the holidays Christmastime, I always listened to
more like that Jazzy holidaytype of background sound.
(12:57):
I always hated it.
When I was younger, we had apiano and my parents had this
thing that allowed the piano tobasically play like on its own.
It was kind of creepy actually,thinking back to it, but.
They would always play itlike in the background.
So I, I think I was just morein this place of like, no, I
(13:18):
just wanna listen to music.
Like I really wannalisten to music.
But now, as the world hasgotten so loud, I listen to
a lot of music that doesn'thave any singing in it, that
doesn't have any vocals in it.
That is reallyjust instrumentals.
That's really justbackground music.
(13:40):
Depending on my vibe, dependingon my mood, lo-fi, jazz, piano,
any, any of those three I kindof inter interchangeably go to.
And it is the best, like,I don't know what it is.
About the, the sereneness, thecalmness of having that playing
(14:01):
in the background, but it hasreally, surely changed my life
and allowed me to kind of fillthis empty space as I'm working
or as I'm doing something thatI really need to focus on.
Because I don't know aboutyou, but if I am playing some
sort of like Spanish music, Ijust wanna get up and dance.
Uh, Tate McCrae has been veryheavy on my Spotify playlist
(14:22):
lately, and all I wanna dois actually sing her songs.
And I cannot multitask.
I cannot sing and writeand do intentional
work at the same time.
So, lo-fi, jazz, pianomusic, calm music,
background music, two things.
That kind of go in this samerealm of creating more of
(14:44):
this atmosphere for yourproductivity, creativity, um,
or just creating more of thatself-awareness that that space
that you need to kind of be withyourself that, that quiet, I
purchased these Sony headphones.
And I'm gonna link everythingphysical that I have for you
(15:06):
guys in the show notes andeverything, because when I
tell you these changed mylife, it's a little bit more
of an expensive purchase,but oh my goodness, these
are the best headphones ever.
I was looking at, you know,the bows headphones and,
and this and that becausethey were cute and whatnot.
And then I was like, wait asecond, let me do some, you
(15:26):
know, let me do some digging.
Let me actually investin a really good.
Pair of headphones and I did,and they're noise canceling.
I can change like hownoise canceling they are.
But when I tell you that I don'teven need to put music on, I can
just put them over my ears andI hear nothing, which is, you
(15:47):
know, a good and a bad thing.
But for the most part, a goodthing, especially on a plane.
Oh my God.
I don't think I couldever fly on a plane
without these headphones.
They have genuinelychanged my life.
A purchase that's alittle bit lower, that
also changed my life.
That's kind of in the samerealm are loop earplugs are
(16:10):
really cute, and they'reliterally just an earplug.
They don't, theydon't play music.
They're not Bluetooth oranything like that, so they're
a little bit more of a lowbuy-in cost, but they're.
Cute.
You know how like you go sitat, at like a, a concert or a,
a sports game or something likethat, and maybe they give you
earplugs to put in your ears.
I think on planes they give youearplugs too, and they're just
(16:34):
like this, this mushy plasticy,whatever.
And they're not cute.
And to be honest with you,they don't really work either.
Loop has elevated thisexperience of, um, using
earplugs and they kind oflook like little pieces
of jewelry in your ear.
(16:55):
I brought them with me to atrip that we had went on in
the beginning of the year and.
Uh, I didn't have my headphonesor I think my headphones were
dead or something like that,but I had the loop earplugs and
I put them in my ear becausethe airport was so loud and we
had, we got in there like tooquick that like never happens.
(17:17):
But we got there in into theairport way too quick and had
to wait about an hour beforeour flight and it was packed
with so many people and I wasjust getting so overstimulated.
So I used my loop earplugs and.
When I tell you Chef's Kiss,life changed, life changed
(17:38):
for 30 bucks, life changed.
I could still hearwhat was going on.
I could still talk topeople, but everything was
muffled in this way where Icould kind of be at peace.
Another recent purchase thatI made that I really do think
changed my life, trace minerals.
(18:01):
I go to this workout studiocalled Margot's and Margaret,
the owner, the founder, she hadmentioned it at, at some point,
um, about trace minerals, and Iwas like, huh, I never thought
to put minerals in my water.
And you could put the traceminerals in anything it, the
(18:21):
trace minerals has a coupleof different minerals in
them, including magnesium,I wanna say phosphorus.
It has a bunch of mineralsin it that normally can
be found in natural water.
And I thought about this for asecond 'cause we had gone to,
on a trip to Europe, actuallyvery close back to back.
(18:44):
And when you're inEurope specifically.
When you go to purchase likea water bottle, first of all,
no one drinks water thereand you kind of are left to
question like, okay, well why?
Why is everybody here inthe United States like
carrying water with them?
But over there no one'scarrying water with them.
It's because they're hydrated.
'cause they don't need tocarry the water with them.
(19:06):
Maybe, maybe I'm missingsomething, but that's my good
assumption as to why they're notall carrying water and chugging
water like we are over here.
And I'm sure there's a moredetailed answer, but when you
go purchase water like a waterbottle, there are no waters that
don't have minerals in them.
So it kind of makes youthink, okay, over here I'm
(19:28):
going to purchase waterat a Wawa bottled water.
And the waters that haveminerals in them are
extremely expensive.
And then you have allthe other options.
Why are the optionssolely over there?
Just mineral water.
Water that actually has thenatural minerals still in it.
(19:51):
So it got me thinking, okay,maybe I should go look into and
research these trace minerals.
I started adding these traceminerals and they, they
consider them like the naturalelectrolytes for your water.
I started adding it to my water.
I have like a 40ounce Stanley cup.
(20:13):
I would add 40 drops.
The serving size for aday is 80 drops, and I
started doing 40 drops asto not make it too salty.
'cause a lot of peoplesay that if you do too
much, it's too salty oryou can actually taste it.
I started doing just half ineach time I filled up my water.
(20:33):
I don't even know how to explainthis because I am the last
person that would sit here andlike recommend a supplement
or something that is reallyhard to kind of see the, the
change or the difference in.
But after just doing thisfor a week after just taking
(20:53):
trace minerals for a week,I felt so much better.
Like I felt like mybody was hydrated.
I felt like I had more energylike I was alive, like I
was literally replenishingsomething in my body that
I was like negligent in.
(21:16):
And I swear to you, I willnever stop putting minerals
in my water ever, and it's somuch less expensive to do it.
Kind of manually like thisthan it is to just go purchase
water bottles that have mineralminerals in them, like Fiji
(21:37):
water or something like that.
Or to really put your time,energy, and money into
purchasing that whole filteredwater system that some people
purchase for their homes.
This.
This small thingchanged my life.
This small purchasechanged my life.
(21:57):
This is your invitationto a day you deserve.
Bloom is more than an event.
It's the first ever immersiveself-love experience, a full
day designed just for youto connect, to feel seen,
and to finally receive theenergy and joy you've been
giving away to everyone else.
From inspiring spaces toamazing brands, thoughtful
(22:19):
experiences, photo apps, food,drinks, and free goodies.
This is a day youwon't wanna miss.
Every detail is created tohelp you love yourself more.
In this space, we're extendingpresale just for you.
Make sure to use thecode Extend at Checkout
for $20 off your ticket.
Join us this September becauseyou deserve a data bloom.
(22:43):
That was actually acommercial break because I
did in fact go have dinner.
Nick and I went on a littledate and I was panicking.
There are clothes all over,sprawled all over my office
in my bedroom right now.
And because I couldn't figureout what to wear, and I get in
(23:05):
the car and he says somethingto me, he goes, you don't
have just like a go-to outfit.
An outfit that you justwear when you need something
to wear for like a dateor like to go out in.
And I was like, no,the weather changes.
What do you mean a go-to outfit?
(23:25):
I don't have a go-to outfit.
This is Nick's littletip to change your life.
Maybe have a go-to outfit.
I just, I think we're inthis weird in-between.
As I film this episoderight now of that weather
that still feels wintery.
(23:46):
Like it's still cold,but it's still warm.
Like it's like that, that50, 60 degrees and I just
have no idea what to wear.
'cause I need a coat, butI don't have a coat that.
Maybe that's what I need.
I need an elevated coat.
I need a coat that is good forthat in-between weather and
(24:11):
that would fix all my problems.
Maybe that's you.
Maybe that's you.
So before the break, we werejust talking about trace
minerals and how I. Taking traceminerals or putting them in
my water every time I drink ithas completely changed my life.
It really has made mefeel so much better.
(24:32):
To that same point though,supplements trace minerals
and supplements andvitamins, there are so
many different things that.
I feel like we're we're marketedto take, take this, try that.
This'll fix that.
You should do this.
(24:53):
And it's always the marketingof, Hey, do this instead of
taking a medication or dothis and you'll feel better.
And sometimes those resultsare just not happening.
You know, I think at the endof the day we should be getting
(25:14):
these supplements, theseminerals, these vitamins from
our food, but I have no ideawhat's in my food nowadays.
So I would rather be safethan sorry and take certain
supplements that I need tokind of replenish where I
might not be getting them.
(25:35):
And if the trace mineralsare making me feel a lot
better, I'm gonna keeptaking those trace minerals.
But my other small thingthat changed my life is that
I stopped taking so manysupplements, completely stopped.
And this is why all of thesupplements I was taking,
(25:58):
whether it was coming froma protein shake, actually.
It was mostly coming fromprotein shakes, or I was
taking tons and tons ofvitamins in the morning.
I'm talking like 5, 6, 7,8 pills in the morning.
No medication oranything like that.
Just all vitamins like vitaminD, magnesium, uh, vitamin C.
(26:23):
And it's not that any ofthose are bad for you,
it's that they weren'tbeing taken with intention.
I was just taking them becausewe're told to take them.
You know, we're told totake a multivitamin, take
this, try that, do this.
I wasn't intentionally choosingmy vitamins specifically,
(26:47):
or supplements based onwhat I needed and what my
body needed, and that wascausing me cystic acne.
I know, I know abig, a big thing.
I can say this actually was areally big thing that changed
my life, but it took so manyyears to finally figure out.
(27:11):
We've talked about this in acouple of episodes about my
journey with birth control,coming off of birth control.
Um, I'm not even sure ifwe've really talked about
my journey with cysticacne, but if I look back.
To all of the times inmy life when I had cystic
acne, it wasn't consistent.
(27:31):
It was very random.
It was around 2016 and itwas around 20 20 20, 20 21.
During both of those times inmy life, I was the healthiest.
(27:53):
I had ever been.
So you're kind of wonderinglike, well then why did
you have cystic acne?
I had no idea.
I had no clue.
Nothing else had reallychanged in my life.
I was on the same birthcontrol for years.
I. Hadn't switched up anythingspecifically, like in my diet
(28:16):
or my lifestyle in my life.
Everything was checking offas clear in regards to like
my blood work and any otherdoctors I had seen nothing.
So I kind of like chalked itup to just being hereditary
because my sister had hadit, my dad had had it.
So I figured that maybethis is just something
that my, that happens to myfamily and, and that's it.
(28:40):
But I visited a aestheticianthat specialized in cystic
acne, and she asked me a reallyinteresting question after this
appointment, and she's like,do you take any supplements?
And I said, you know, justlike maybe like a, a protein
shake, like protein supplementsand, and you know, vitamins
(29:02):
and everything like that.
And she's like, okay, B six.
B six has been shownto cause cystic acne
when taken in excess.
And when you take so manysupplements and so many
vitamins, of course you're gonnatake these things in excess
(29:23):
because a lot of brands wantto stuff all of their products
with as many good things aspossible, rather than just focus
on that one thing that you need.
So in a lot of proteinsupplements, there is B six.
I'm gonna try to find likethe article or the actual case
(29:44):
study if there is one on this,but all I know is is that
whether a study exists or not.
The minute I stopped.
Overusing specifically proteinsupplements, but supplements,
vitamins in general.
(30:05):
I stopped getting cystic acne.
I completely cameoff of birth control.
I am very specific and moreintentional with the type of
supplements that I take, andI still do have the occasional
protein shake, but I reallytry to limit it to one once
or twice a week rather thanhaving one every single day.
(30:26):
I have not had nearly anycystic acne since that
20 20, 20 21 time period.
I tried going on a differentbirth control and while that
worked off on in Dandy, Iended up being the biggest
raging bitch that year afterI changed my birth control.
(30:48):
I did talk more indepth about this in.
Another episode.
I will link that episodebelow for you in the show
notes, in the descriptionso you can check it out.
It's a lot about my story withcoming off of birth control,
with being on birth controland really learning my body as
(31:10):
it is without any medicationor anything like that.
So if you are strugglingwith acne with
specifically cystic acne.
Take a look at what you'reeating, what you're putting
into your body, and maybe thismight be the same thing for you.
(31:30):
Maybe you are taking intoo many supplements.
So now I can count onone hand all of the
supplements that I take.
Supplements, vitamins andthe top ones are of course
(31:50):
those trace minerals.
I also take L lysine reallyamazing for your skin.
Really great ifyou get cold sores.
Cranberry.
Occasionally, if I feel theneed to more consistently a
probiotic and a prebiotic,they work together.
So you definitely wannatake those together.
(32:11):
Usually don't necessarilyneed the probiotic and the
prebiotic as long as you aregetting those within your food.
So probiotic would be somethinglike yogurt, um, and a prebiotic
would be anything that haslots of, uh, good fiber.
And then.
I did and was takingneutrophil for a while.
It didn't necessarily makeit to my list for the things
(32:33):
that changed my life justbecause, not because it hasn't
worked and it doesn't work.
I, for me, I. It did work,and it has some like before
and afters that I've takento kind of keep track
of, okay, does this work?
Because that's really theonly way to prove it right
to yourself, at least toyourself, is having those
(32:53):
before and after pictures.
My hair grew a lot, everysingle time I've taken
neutrophil in my life, and Istill take it occasionally.
But it's a lot.
Have you seen that thing?
It's four pills.
It's four vitamins, and I thinkwith my, I, I literally get
(33:14):
so scared taking supplementsnow, thinking that my, my
acne's gonna come back.
And although I had takenneutrophil for a year straight
and that did not happen.
And I also take Mary Ruth's.
So that's kind of the gist ofthe main supplements that I will
take or supplements and vitaminsthat I will take and I will try.
(33:35):
I'm in the process oftrying, uh, Arma and
seeing if that will help.
Um, kind of just with likegetting sick and I think
the whole supplement vitaminconversation could be, could
make for a great episode.
All in and of itself.
This list kept going.
I have so many more to sharewith you, and as I said in part
(33:58):
one, this has to be a series.
We have to make this a series.
Sometimes it is the smallestreminders or quotes or
sayings like the Let ThemTheory or it's the smallest.
Purchase or mostintentional purchase.
So I hope that after listeningto part two of the small things
(34:21):
that changed my life, I hopethat you will find that some
of these things will alsohelp you change your life.
Thank you so much for tuningin to another episode of
the Self-Love Archives.
If I missed something, whichI'm sure that I have, because
there are so many things thatcould potentially change our
(34:43):
lives, big or small, I wannahear your thoughts and what
are the small things thatchange your life currently?
What are you implementing?
What are you.
Doing.
What are you sayingto yourself every day?
What purchases have beenthe best thing ever?
(35:04):
Leave that in thecomments below.
I wanna hear them.
I'm excited to hear aboutthem and I'll see you
guys in the next episode.
Talk to you soon.
Bye.
The small things that changed my life
and that are probably gonnachange your life as well.
When we look at the biggerpicture of where we are, I'm
sure that you can pinpointsomething that you purchased,
something that you startedimplementing, something
(00:20):
that you started doing.
Maybe you started listening to.
That absolutely changed yourlife, and maybe it's something
really small, but it's somethingthat made such an impact on
you that you've just keptdoing it, kept purchasing it.
That's what today's episodeis all about, and this
(00:42):
is part two of my series.
The small thingsthat Changed My Life.
Welcome back to theSelf-Love Archives podcast.
(01:03):
I'm your host, Julia Salvia,your self love besie, and I'm
really excited to be back herewith part two of the small
things that changed my life.
I even re-listened to theoriginal episode of the Small
Things That Changed My Life.
It is episode eight.
It was one of the very firstepisodes that I posted here
on the Self-Love Archives.
It's still a reallygreat listen.
(01:24):
I actually need tore-implement some of the
things and repurchasesome of the things that I
talked about in that firstepisode, especially walking.
I feel like wealways lose walking.
When it gets cold in thecolder months because it
just gets a little bitharder to get yourself to
go outside, especially whenit's in a million layers.
(01:46):
But I have some new ones foryou today and I'm super excited
to share them with you becausethey really have, these small
things really have been changingmy life lately, and I hope
that they can change yours.
We're gonna startoff really strong.
Stop.
Giving in to perfectionor whatever you
(02:07):
think perfection is.
Yeah.
This one is a doozy.
This one's a little bit hard.
I have to say that as muchas I truly am aware of this
and do my best to implementthis into every single day
of my life, and just kindof have the saying, like
it's literally like tattooedon the inside of my brain.
(02:30):
Stop trying to be perfect.
As much as I try to, sometimesit is very difficult because
I think we have these societalexpectations of only being
able to do things like, you canonly do this if it's perfect.
You can only love yourselfif you're perfect.
(02:51):
You can only buy that ifit's perfect, or you can only
create that if it's perfect.
You can only announceit if it's perfect.
What is perfect anyway?
Who?
Who coined the term perfect?
Because I wanna have a chat.
We need to talk becausewhat the fuck is perfect?
(03:12):
What does that even mean?
When I started to let goof everything needing to be
perfect, and I'm talking downto the way that I cut the apple
that I eat in the morning.
Have you ever caught yourselfjust feeling like you can't
(03:35):
actually make a move or make adecision because you're waiting
for all of these things toline up all of these things
to be perfect, or you'rewaiting to have a conversation
with someone or reach outbecause you're waiting for
the perfect time, or you'rewaiting for the perfect moment?
How, how silly is that to holdyourself back because you're
(03:58):
waiting for perfection, becauseyou're waiting for something
that doesn't even exist.
There's no such thing asperfect the way that you get
better at something, or theway that you start to perfect
something is you just do it.
Or maybe it doesn'teven really matter.
(04:19):
You know, when I, when Istarted letting that go, or
at least trying my best to,it really changed the way that
I started to make decisionsand it really changed the way
that I would then go on to acton something, especially when
it comes to sharing with youon social media or sharing.
(04:44):
With other people or startinga conversation that might be
hard or doing something thatmaybe I don't know how to do.
It helped build my confidenceand my trust in myself
when I let go of theperfection and just did it.
Small thing, small littlething that changed my life.
(05:08):
Even though this small thing,it feels more like a big thing.
That it does not have tobe perfect to let go of
whatever perfect means orto let go of perfection.
I think that this next one mighttake the cake it, it might take
the cake, gobble it all up, thewhole nine micro boundaries.
(05:35):
Micro boundaries, notthese big boundaries where
you stop talking to thisperson or you cut this
person out of your life.
Micro boundaries.
I started putting myphone on do not disturb.
It's on do not disturb 24 7.
Unless I am fully awarethat I have a call coming
in or that I need torespond to something ASAP.
(05:59):
And even then, that's setup with some boundaries.
My phone's on do not disturb,and that's one of the micro
boundaries that I have myphone's on Do not disturb as to
not disturb me from a creativemoment that I'm having as to
not disturb me from doing thethings that I need to do for me.
(06:23):
So if I'm meditating, whatis the worst thing that could
happen while I'm meditating?
Oh yeah, my phone going off.
So my phone is always on donot disturb, and I stopped
feeling bad about it.
It's really just more of a wayfor me to do the things that
I need to do for me first sothat I can then get back to you
(06:47):
or get back to an email or getback to a notification later.
And to that same point.
Another micro boundary thatI think is so important
that kind of ties in withhaving your phone on do not
disturb, is not feeling theneed to respond to someone or
something as soon as possible.
(07:08):
Some other person's rush,someone else's time management
or lack thereof is not.
Your fault, it's not on you.
Just because they are in a rushfor a response does not dictate
(07:29):
for you to have a response backto their question or to their
email, to their text message.
ASAP, and this is comingfrom the girl that used to
literally answer a text message.
I'd answer you back in seconds.
My phone always literallyright at my face, and that
(07:49):
took me away from doing somany things for myself or
so many things that I hadto get done or had to do.
My answer can wait,my response can wait.
It does not have to be ASAP.
Don't allow someone else's rush.
(08:11):
Make you feel like you needto have the same rush back.
Whatever is yours,will still be yours.
Whatever is meant foryou will still be yours.
Keep that in mind, especiallywhen it comes to those job
interviews or those timeswhere you feel like you need to
respond with a, an answer, ASAP.
(08:34):
You don't.
You can take your time.
You can set thoselittle micro boundaries.
Any micro boundary that is goingto let you keep your peace is
a boundary that you should set.
And you know exactly whichones I'm talking about.
Oh, you guys are gonna be so madat me for this one because this,
(08:57):
a lot of these small thingsthat changed your life are just,
are kind of like Mel Robbins.
Let them theory.
You're reading this book asI was reading Mel Robbins.
Let them theory book, andI'm listening to her podcast
and her auto audio book and,and I'm just hearing her talk
about this and I'm like, well,obviously Mel, like, yeah, I'm
(09:19):
gonna let them and let me, I'mgonna let them say whatever they
want, do whatever they want,choose whatever they want, and
I'm going to then choose anddo whatever I want for myself.
Yeah, of course.
Duh.
The fact that she coined a termfor this allows you to kind
(09:43):
of put all of these actionsinto almost like a category in
your brain to then allow you.
To easily make the choice tolet them, let them say what
they want, let them do whatthey do, let them be who they
want, choose what they want,whatever, and then let me go
(10:04):
do what I need to do for me.
So we could throw that in here.
Um, the small things thatchanged my life, uh, let them,
yeah, that is definitely, thatgoes beyond a micro boundary.
That is a strong.
Realization and boundary thatyou are setting with other
(10:24):
people in order to do whatyou need to do for yourself.
Let them call you 20 times.
Let them text you 20 times.
Let them email you three times,and then you get to choose
what you are going to do next.
What is your next move?
What is the best thing thatyou need to do for you?
(10:46):
At the end of the day, youdon't have control over what
anyone else does, so whatdo you need to do for you?
That brings me to number threeor technically number four,
since that is just such a good.
Term to take with you.
It's another thing to engravein the inside of your brain.
Let them, and let me, numberfour, is be kinder to yourself.
(11:08):
I know, I know.
I know.
This sounds so straightforwardand so simple and so easy, but
when you actually make it apoint to be kinder to yourself,
you allow the opportunity.
To be kinder to your,to yourself, you allow
the opportunity to bekinder to yourself.
(11:30):
You allow the space and theenergy and the awareness,
the self-awareness to catchyourself when you say something
that isn't so kind, whenyou're looking at yourself in
the mirror and you're like,oh, I look so fat today,
and you catch yourself andyou're like, you know what?
No, that's not true.
(11:52):
I look great today.
Maybe I'm not feeling sogreat today, but I look
great today and I am not.
Those things, when you makeit a point to be kinder to
yourself, you make it a pointto be self-aware of how you're
speaking to yourself and howyou are talking to yourself,
(12:12):
and I think that is such asmall change that you can
make, a small intention thatyou can make with yourself.
To change how you feel aboutyourself day in and day out.
Let's get into thefun ones, shall we?
(12:33):
Some things that havechanged my life, Ugh.
If you know melistening to calm music.
Jazz music, piano music,music with no sound.
Some people like lo-fi,some people like jazz.
During the holidays Christmastime, I always listened to
more like that Jazzy holidaytype of background sound.
(12:57):
I always hated it.
When I was younger, we had apiano and my parents had this
thing that allowed the piano tobasically play like on its own.
It was kind of creepy actually,thinking back to it, but.
They would always play itlike in the background.
So I, I think I was just morein this place of like, no, I
(13:18):
just wanna listen to music.
Like I really wannalisten to music.
But now, as the world hasgotten so loud, I listen to
a lot of music that doesn'thave any singing in it, that
doesn't have any vocals in it.
That is reallyjust instrumentals.
That's really justbackground music.
(13:40):
Depending on my vibe, dependingon my mood, lo-fi, jazz, piano,
any, any of those three I kindof inter interchangeably go to.
And it is the best, like,I don't know what it is.
About the, the sereneness, thecalmness of having that playing
(14:01):
in the background, but it hasreally, surely changed my life
and allowed me to kind of fillthis empty space as I'm working
or as I'm doing something thatI really need to focus on.
Because I don't know aboutyou, but if I am playing some
sort of like Spanish music, Ijust wanna get up and dance.
Uh, Tate McCrae has been veryheavy on my Spotify playlist
(14:22):
lately, and all I wanna dois actually sing her songs.
And I cannot multitask.
I cannot sing and writeand do intentional
work at the same time.
So, lo-fi, jazz, pianomusic, calm music,
background music, two things.
That kind of go in this samerealm of creating more of
(14:44):
this atmosphere for yourproductivity, creativity, um,
or just creating more of thatself-awareness that that space
that you need to kind of be withyourself that, that quiet, I
purchased these Sony headphones.
And I'm gonna link everythingphysical that I have for you
(15:06):
guys in the show notes andeverything, because when I
tell you these changed mylife, it's a little bit more
of an expensive purchase,but oh my goodness, these
are the best headphones ever.
I was looking at, you know,the bows headphones and,
and this and that becausethey were cute and whatnot.
And then I was like, wait asecond, let me do some, you
(15:26):
know, let me do some digging.
Let me actually investin a really good.
Pair of headphones and I did,and they're noise canceling.
I can change like hownoise canceling they are.
But when I tell you that I don'teven need to put music on, I can
just put them over my ears andI hear nothing, which is, you
(15:47):
know, a good and a bad thing.
But for the most part, a goodthing, especially on a plane.
Oh my God.
I don't think I couldever fly on a plane
without these headphones.
They have genuinelychanged my life.
A purchase that's alittle bit lower, that
also changed my life.
That's kind of in the samerealm are loop earplugs are
(16:10):
really cute, and they'reliterally just an earplug.
They don't, theydon't play music.
They're not Bluetooth oranything like that, so they're
a little bit more of a lowbuy-in cost, but they're.
Cute.
You know how like you go sitat, at like a, a concert or a,
a sports game or something likethat, and maybe they give you
earplugs to put in your ears.
I think on planes they give youearplugs too, and they're just
(16:34):
like this, this mushy plasticy,whatever.
And they're not cute.
And to be honest with you,they don't really work either.
Loop has elevated thisexperience of, um, using
earplugs and they kind oflook like little pieces
of jewelry in your ear.
(16:55):
I brought them with me to atrip that we had went on in
the beginning of the year and.
Uh, I didn't have my headphonesor I think my headphones were
dead or something like that,but I had the loop earplugs and
I put them in my ear becausethe airport was so loud and we
had, we got in there like tooquick that like never happens.
(17:17):
But we got there in into theairport way too quick and had
to wait about an hour beforeour flight and it was packed
with so many people and I wasjust getting so overstimulated.
So I used my loop earplugs and.
When I tell you Chef's Kiss,life changed, life changed
(17:38):
for 30 bucks, life changed.
I could still hearwhat was going on.
I could still talk topeople, but everything was
muffled in this way where Icould kind of be at peace.
Another recent purchase thatI made that I really do think
changed my life, trace minerals.
(18:01):
I go to this workout studiocalled Margot's and Margaret,
the owner, the founder, she hadmentioned it at, at some point,
um, about trace minerals, and Iwas like, huh, I never thought
to put minerals in my water.
And you could put the traceminerals in anything it, the
(18:21):
trace minerals has a coupleof different minerals in
them, including magnesium,I wanna say phosphorus.
It has a bunch of mineralsin it that normally can
be found in natural water.
And I thought about this for asecond 'cause we had gone to,
on a trip to Europe, actuallyvery close back to back.
(18:44):
And when you're inEurope specifically.
When you go to purchase likea water bottle, first of all,
no one drinks water thereand you kind of are left to
question like, okay, well why?
Why is everybody here inthe United States like
carrying water with them?
But over there no one'scarrying water with them.
It's because they're hydrated.
'cause they don't need tocarry the water with them.
(19:06):
Maybe, maybe I'm missingsomething, but that's my good
assumption as to why they're notall carrying water and chugging
water like we are over here.
And I'm sure there's a moredetailed answer, but when you
go purchase water like a waterbottle, there are no waters that
don't have minerals in them.
So it kind of makes youthink, okay, over here I'm
(19:28):
going to purchase waterat a Wawa bottled water.
And the waters that haveminerals in them are
extremely expensive.
And then you have allthe other options.
Why are the optionssolely over there?
Just mineral water.
Water that actually has thenatural minerals still in it.
(19:51):
So it got me thinking, okay,maybe I should go look into and
research these trace minerals.
I started adding these traceminerals and they, they
consider them like the naturalelectrolytes for your water.
I started adding it to my water.
I have like a 40ounce Stanley cup.
(20:13):
I would add 40 drops.
The serving size for aday is 80 drops, and I
started doing 40 drops asto not make it too salty.
'cause a lot of peoplesay that if you do too
much, it's too salty oryou can actually taste it.
I started doing just half ineach time I filled up my water.
(20:33):
I don't even know how to explainthis because I am the last
person that would sit here andlike recommend a supplement
or something that is reallyhard to kind of see the, the
change or the difference in.
But after just doing thisfor a week after just taking
(20:53):
trace minerals for a week,I felt so much better.
Like I felt like mybody was hydrated.
I felt like I had more energylike I was alive, like I
was literally replenishingsomething in my body that
I was like negligent in.
(21:16):
And I swear to you, I willnever stop putting minerals
in my water ever, and it's somuch less expensive to do it.
Kind of manually like thisthan it is to just go purchase
water bottles that have mineralminerals in them, like Fiji
(21:37):
water or something like that.
Or to really put your time,energy, and money into
purchasing that whole filteredwater system that some people
purchase for their homes.
This.
This small thingchanged my life.
This small purchasechanged my life.
(21:57):
This is your invitationto a day you deserve.
Bloom is more than an event.
It's the first ever immersiveself-love experience, a full
day designed just for youto connect, to feel seen,
and to finally receive theenergy and joy you've been
giving away to everyone else.
From inspiring spaces toamazing brands, thoughtful
(22:19):
experiences, photo apps, food,drinks, and free goodies.
This is a day youwon't wanna miss.
Every detail is created tohelp you love yourself more.
In this space, we're extendingpresale just for you.
Make sure to use thecode Extend at Checkout
for $20 off your ticket.
Join us this September becauseyou deserve a data bloom.
(22:43):
That was actually acommercial break because I
did in fact go have dinner.
Nick and I went on a littledate and I was panicking.
There are clothes all over,sprawled all over my office
in my bedroom right now.
And because I couldn't figureout what to wear, and I get in
(23:05):
the car and he says somethingto me, he goes, you don't
have just like a go-to outfit.
An outfit that you justwear when you need something
to wear for like a dateor like to go out in.
And I was like, no,the weather changes.
What do you mean a go-to outfit?
(23:25):
I don't have a go-to outfit.
This is Nick's littletip to change your life.
Maybe have a go-to outfit.
I just, I think we're inthis weird in-between.
As I film this episoderight now of that weather
that still feels wintery.
(23:46):
Like it's still cold,but it's still warm.
Like it's like that, that50, 60 degrees and I just
have no idea what to wear.
'cause I need a coat, butI don't have a coat that.
Maybe that's what I need.
I need an elevated coat.
I need a coat that is good forthat in-between weather and
(24:11):
that would fix all my problems.
Maybe that's you.
Maybe that's you.
So before the break, we werejust talking about trace
minerals and how I. Taking traceminerals or putting them in
my water every time I drink ithas completely changed my life.
It really has made mefeel so much better.
(24:32):
To that same point though,supplements trace minerals
and supplements andvitamins, there are so
many different things that.
I feel like we're we're marketedto take, take this, try that.
This'll fix that.
You should do this.
(24:53):
And it's always the marketingof, Hey, do this instead of
taking a medication or dothis and you'll feel better.
And sometimes those resultsare just not happening.
You know, I think at the endof the day we should be getting
(25:14):
these supplements, theseminerals, these vitamins from
our food, but I have no ideawhat's in my food nowadays.
So I would rather be safethan sorry and take certain
supplements that I need tokind of replenish where I
might not be getting them.
(25:35):
And if the trace mineralsare making me feel a lot
better, I'm gonna keeptaking those trace minerals.
But my other small thingthat changed my life is that
I stopped taking so manysupplements, completely stopped.
And this is why all of thesupplements I was taking,
(25:58):
whether it was coming froma protein shake, actually.
It was mostly coming fromprotein shakes, or I was
taking tons and tons ofvitamins in the morning.
I'm talking like 5, 6, 7,8 pills in the morning.
No medication oranything like that.
Just all vitamins like vitaminD, magnesium, uh, vitamin C.
(26:23):
And it's not that any ofthose are bad for you,
it's that they weren'tbeing taken with intention.
I was just taking them becausewe're told to take them.
You know, we're told totake a multivitamin, take
this, try that, do this.
I wasn't intentionally choosingmy vitamins specifically,
(26:47):
or supplements based onwhat I needed and what my
body needed, and that wascausing me cystic acne.
I know, I know abig, a big thing.
I can say this actually was areally big thing that changed
my life, but it took so manyyears to finally figure out.
(27:11):
We've talked about this in acouple of episodes about my
journey with birth control,coming off of birth control.
Um, I'm not even sure ifwe've really talked about
my journey with cysticacne, but if I look back.
To all of the times inmy life when I had cystic
acne, it wasn't consistent.
(27:31):
It was very random.
It was around 2016 and itwas around 20 20 20, 20 21.
During both of those times inmy life, I was the healthiest.
(27:53):
I had ever been.
So you're kind of wonderinglike, well then why did
you have cystic acne?
I had no idea.
I had no clue.
Nothing else had reallychanged in my life.
I was on the same birthcontrol for years.
I. Hadn't switched up anythingspecifically, like in my diet
(28:16):
or my lifestyle in my life.
Everything was checking offas clear in regards to like
my blood work and any otherdoctors I had seen nothing.
So I kind of like chalked itup to just being hereditary
because my sister had hadit, my dad had had it.
So I figured that maybethis is just something
that my, that happens to myfamily and, and that's it.
(28:40):
But I visited a aestheticianthat specialized in cystic
acne, and she asked me a reallyinteresting question after this
appointment, and she's like,do you take any supplements?
And I said, you know, justlike maybe like a, a protein
shake, like protein supplementsand, and you know, vitamins
(29:02):
and everything like that.
And she's like, okay, B six.
B six has been shownto cause cystic acne
when taken in excess.
And when you take so manysupplements and so many
vitamins, of course you're gonnatake these things in excess
(29:23):
because a lot of brands wantto stuff all of their products
with as many good things aspossible, rather than just focus
on that one thing that you need.
So in a lot of proteinsupplements, there is B six.
I'm gonna try to find likethe article or the actual case
(29:44):
study if there is one on this,but all I know is is that
whether a study exists or not.
The minute I stopped.
Overusing specifically proteinsupplements, but supplements,
vitamins in general.
(30:05):
I stopped getting cystic acne.
I completely cameoff of birth control.
I am very specific and moreintentional with the type of
supplements that I take, andI still do have the occasional
protein shake, but I reallytry to limit it to one once
or twice a week rather thanhaving one every single day.
(30:26):
I have not had nearly anycystic acne since that
20 20, 20 21 time period.
I tried going on a differentbirth control and while that
worked off on in Dandy, Iended up being the biggest
raging bitch that year afterI changed my birth control.
(30:48):
I did talk more indepth about this in.
Another episode.
I will link that episodebelow for you in the show
notes, in the descriptionso you can check it out.
It's a lot about my story withcoming off of birth control,
with being on birth controland really learning my body as
(31:10):
it is without any medicationor anything like that.
So if you are strugglingwith acne with
specifically cystic acne.
Take a look at what you'reeating, what you're putting
into your body, and maybe thismight be the same thing for you.
(31:30):
Maybe you are taking intoo many supplements.
So now I can count onone hand all of the
supplements that I take.
Supplements, vitamins andthe top ones are of course
(31:50):
those trace minerals.
I also take L lysine reallyamazing for your skin.
Really great ifyou get cold sores.
Cranberry.
Occasionally, if I feel theneed to more consistently a
probiotic and a prebiotic,they work together.
So you definitely wannatake those together.
(32:11):
Usually don't necessarilyneed the probiotic and the
prebiotic as long as you aregetting those within your food.
So probiotic would be somethinglike yogurt, um, and a prebiotic
would be anything that haslots of, uh, good fiber.
And then.
I did and was takingneutrophil for a while.
It didn't necessarily makeit to my list for the things
(32:33):
that changed my life justbecause, not because it hasn't
worked and it doesn't work.
I, for me, I. It did work,and it has some like before
and afters that I've takento kind of keep track
of, okay, does this work?
Because that's really theonly way to prove it right
to yourself, at least toyourself, is having those
(32:53):
before and after pictures.
My hair grew a lot, everysingle time I've taken
neutrophil in my life, and Istill take it occasionally.
But it's a lot.
Have you seen that thing?
It's four pills.
It's four vitamins, and I thinkwith my, I, I literally get
(33:14):
so scared taking supplementsnow, thinking that my, my
acne's gonna come back.
And although I had takenneutrophil for a year straight
and that did not happen.
And I also take Mary Ruth's.
So that's kind of the gist ofthe main supplements that I will
take or supplements and vitaminsthat I will take and I will try.
(33:35):
I'm in the process oftrying, uh, Arma and
seeing if that will help.
Um, kind of just with likegetting sick and I think
the whole supplement vitaminconversation could be, could
make for a great episode.
All in and of itself.
This list kept going.
I have so many more to sharewith you, and as I said in part
(33:58):
one, this has to be a series.
We have to make this a series.
Sometimes it is the smallestreminders or quotes or
sayings like the Let ThemTheory or it's the smallest.
Purchase or mostintentional purchase.
So I hope that after listeningto part two of the small things
(34:21):
that changed my life, I hopethat you will find that some
of these things will alsohelp you change your life.
Thank you so much for tuningin to another episode of
the Self-Love Archives.
If I missed something, whichI'm sure that I have, because
there are so many things thatcould potentially change our
(34:43):
lives, big or small, I wannahear your thoughts and what
are the small things thatchange your life currently?
What are you implementing?
What are you.
Doing.
What are you sayingto yourself every day?
What purchases have beenthe best thing ever?
(35:04):
Leave that in thecomments below.
I wanna hear them.
I'm excited to hear aboutthem and I'll see you
guys in the next episode.
Talk to you soon.
Bye.
Popular Podcasts
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.
24/7 News: The Latest
The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.