September 2, 2025 • 42 mins
What if your child's seemingly unusual behaviors are actually their way of connecting with a world most of us can't see?
Catherine Crestani, leadership coach and intuitive healer with nearly two decades of experience as a speech-language pathologist, shares profound insights about the spiritual dimensions of autism that mainstream approaches often miss. Drawing from her extensive work with hundreds of children on the spectrum, Catherine reveals how many nonverbal children possess remarkable intuitive abilities – sensing energies, communicating with spirits, and processing the world in ways that defy conventional understanding.
This conversation takes a deep dive into the power of parental intuition when raising a child with special needs. Sara and Catherine discuss the critical importance of trusting your gut feelings about schools, therapies, and medical advice, even when professionals dismiss your concerns. Through personal stories, including Catherine's experiences with "guardian angels" guiding her nonverbal clients and Sara's discovery that her son's sleep patterns follow lunar cycles, they demonstrate how honoring your child's unique rhythms can lead to profound healing.
Perhaps most powerfully, Catherine shares her perspective on healing generational patterns through self-work. "When you heal something in you, it heals seven generations after and seven generations before," she explains, highlighting how addressing our own wounds creates space for our children to thrive. This shift from trying to "fix" the child to healing the family system offers a revolutionary approach to autism support.
Whether you're parenting a child with autism or supporting families on this journey, this episode will transform how you understand neurodivergence and intuitive connection. Listen now to discover how breaking free from societal expectations and embracing your family's unique path can create unexpected harmony and joy.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
The SJ Child Show is Backford's 13th season.
Join Sarah Bradford and the SJChild Show team as they explore
the world of autism and sharestories of hope and inspiration.
This season we're excited tobring you more autism summits
featuring experts and advocatesfrom around the world.
Go to sjchildsorg to donate andto get more information.
(00:25):
Congratulations on 2024's20,000 downloads and 300
episodes.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Hi, we are back at the SJ Childs show today and I'm
so excited to have my friendwho is in the future.
I love Australians Coming fromthe future.
I love Australians Coming fromthe future, my new friend that
I'm making, catherine, and is itKristani?
Speaker 3 (00:53):
Kristani, perfect, perfect.
Speaker 2 (00:54):
Kristani, and I'm so excited to talk to you today
about your practice andsomething that we both have a
lot of passion and in common.
And yeah, before we get started, please introduce yourself.
Tell us a little bit aboutyourself and what brought you
here today.
Speaker 3 (01:14):
Hey, sarah, so I'm a leadership coach, intuitive
healer, podcaster as well, andan author and a speaker, and but
my background is as a speechlanguage pathologist and I'm
really passionate about workingwith children and mums from both
sides of the spectrum spectrumbut both sides of ends because,
(01:36):
you know, it's so often that weneglect being the mum part of
things, especially when you'reholding that space for children,
especially children withdisabilities.
But, um, I, when I contactedyou, it was like I need to share
my stories because I've had somany amazing experiences, nearly
20 years as a speech therapist,so you know, um, and most of my
(01:58):
caseload was children withautism.
So that is how I landed in thisspace today and it's funny
because now I'm actuallyfocusing on the mom side of
things to help shift the thingswith children.
So it's been such a journey anda flip in itself.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
And you know, sometimes that's what happens in
.
You see where the lack ofsupport is, in.
You know a genre or an areathat needs more tools and more
resources.
And, boy, do moms really needthat help to refigure where
(02:37):
their mindset is going.
Because, as I'm probably sureyou're going to say in this
conversation, that a lot of itcomes back down to what are you
thinking, what are you?
What are you, what is yourbrain saying to you when you
first wake up in the morning?
What are the patterns you'regoing to be setting for yourself
?
So we haven't had thisconversation before, but just in
case that might be what we'retalking about, I know that's,
(02:59):
you know, real for me.
And, um, I think that it's suchan important part of our
journey to have resources, tohave people we can not only
learn from lean on, listen tothey, listen, you know, kind of
give back and do the same forothers.
(03:20):
It's such a beautiful symbioticrelationship, isn't it?
Speaker 3 (03:24):
Yeah, exactly, and I think you brought up a very good
point, sarah is that you needsupport and you need a dream
team that's what my coach callsit, your dream team because
we're not meant to do this alone.
But then when you add in a childwith a disability, it makes it
incredibly more vital for you tohave that support and respite
(03:47):
and to be able to have thosemoments for yourself, because
it's not being selfish, becausesometimes we just need to fill
our cup back up.
You know, and my beautifulcoach calls it being self-full.
You know, because if you don'tfill up your own cup and let
that overflow, then you're goingto have no energy left to keep
working and showing up as a mum.
(04:08):
And you know, once someone saidto me the universe only gives
us what we can handle, and Ihaven't met a mum yet that can't
, you know, address all theneeds of her child.
Yes, it gets hard, yes, it'sreally extreme, but at the same
time they find a way to make itwork and I think that's a mom's
superpower.
(04:28):
You know the things that momscan get done.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
It's just mind-blowing when we figure out
how to do universal payment formoms right, that's what we need,
payment for being a mom right,learn here.
Here's the support.
But no, it is so true that thisand the lack of support that
you feel kind of at thatbeginning of the journey, when
(04:55):
you are at your pediatricians,you're at your school
psychologist, whatever, andyou're getting that news for the
first time and you feeloverwhelmed and sometimes a
little bit in doubt of yourselfand in doubt of your future, and
I think that being able to thenhave this ladder to climb, this
(05:20):
bridge to cross and have a handto hold to do that, it seems so
much less scary and you get alittle bit of a foothold in,
maybe, where you will be heading.
You know, and each family andeach situation is so
individually different.
Yeah, especially as a speechpathologist, you have seen every
(05:44):
type of of, you know,communication yeah and um very
early on in my career.
Speaker 3 (05:53):
So as a new graduate, my first job, I had 18 children
with autism on my caseload andI had two hours at university on
autism and I had no support andI was like I need to go up
skill and you know so I didn't.
I didn't shy away from it, Iwent.
(06:14):
There's obviously a reason whyum, this is kind of happening.
So I went and invested in myown training and that sort of
thing and don't get me some ofthe training I did.
I was like this is bogusbecause, you know, I like to
have a holistic point of viewfor all my clients.
I think that's why they likedme, because I wouldn't say I'd
be like the one going.
(06:35):
Have you seen a chiropractor?
Have you considered this?
Have you done this?
Have you looked into diet, haveyou?
You know, because that was myextent of my knowledge base.
But at the same time, you know,I remember sitting in this um
workshop and they were talkingabout um.
I actually brought up thequestion.
I was like do you feel dietimpacts?
Oh no, there's no evidence forthat.
(06:57):
And blah, blah, blah, blah,blah.
And I'm just sitting theregoing.
But I have children who andthis isn't a one I'm emphasizing
it's not a one-stop shop, right, because we're all unique,
children are all unique.
But I've had a lot of childrengo off gluten and their
behavior's completely changed.
Or I've had a lot of children,you know, cut out the
preservatives and theirbehavior's completely changed.
You know, I've had all thisevidence.
(07:18):
I'm like I've had kids go onsupplements for, you know, zinc
or B vitamins, and then they'vestarted talking.
And it's not a miracle one-stopshop.
It really depends on what yourbody's doing.
But then for her to sit thereat the front of this very early
on in my career, and I'm likethis doesn't feel right.
Like part of me went oh, yeah,yeah, yeah, yeah.
(07:40):
And then I was like no, like Idon't agree with that, you know.
So it was like continuallyquestioning what was coming
through.
But then, after about two orthree years, I started my own.
Well, I bought into my practicethat I was working for, so I
started this businesspartnership and my whole
caseload was children withautism.
(08:01):
And I'm like, how did thishappen?
And as a therapist, it can beactually quite extreme having a
week like that, because youactually don't get a moment to
breathe, so I get a child withjust a lisp come in and I'd be
like, okay, all right, you knowwe can turn um.
But it got to the point thatwhen a child walked in my door,
even if I'd never met them, I'dknow straight away if they had
(08:24):
um a diagnosis or not.
Yeah, and I was usually the onethat broke it to the parents
and I I knew how it would go andI'm like, look, I need to share
with you what my feelings are.
I said, and you're gonna hateme, and then you're gonna go and
google it, and then you'regonna come back and you're going
to say thank you and and you'regoing to be.
And they said no like, no, no,so, and nine times out of ten
(08:49):
that's exactly what happened,and because at this point I was
like we need to get your childthe most help we need, I need
I'm going to rip the band-aidoff.
You know, and we also wentthrough this stage in Australia
where, um, a lot ofpediatricians were refusing to
diagnose because there was athing saying that it was over
diagnosed.
But I honestly did not have asingle child that I went.
(09:11):
I don't think they're on thespectrum.
I didn't have a single one likethat.
So I'm like where is this overdiagnosis crap coming from,
rather than actually starting toquestion why are the numbers
increasing?
That question was never asked,right, so you know.
And then, um, so, being part ofall that, and then in Australia
this funding came in, um calledthe National Disability
(09:35):
Insurance Scheme and the areathat I was working in, we were a
pilot project for that, so youcould imagine the paperwork,
legalities and the nightmaresthat we learnt being all through
that and everything.
And it's really interestingbecause now I've left the
profession, I'm so grateful tonot have to deal with any of
that in my background.
(09:56):
Yeah, you know, but it was justthat shifting and how different
children can be.
And I would always get reallyfrustrated and I still do when
people go oh, they're just likethis child.
I'm like no, they're not.
And I feel that that's such animportant piece of the puzzle
that every little soul thatcomes and sees you is unique.
(10:17):
You know they all have their.
It doesn't matter if they'resimilar to another child.
They'll have something that'sdifferent.
You know they might remind youof someone else, but at the same
time you have to go in with aunique scope lens of like okay,
who am I?
Who am I seeing right in frontof me?
You know, and I had this beauty.
I called her my, my gift, mygift from the universe, client.
(10:40):
So at this time I'd like soldmy company and I was working in
the company I was still workingfor the company and it wasn't
doing as well and I was workingon commission and I was like, oh
, I could really use some extramoney this way.
It could be so cool if I had anassessment.
And I had no room on mytimetable for an assessment.
I have like this half hour gap.
(11:01):
And anyway, this parent showsup in the waiting room and I was
like, oh, can I help you?
And they're like, oh, yeah,we're booked in for an
assessment.
I'm like, let me just go doublecheck.
I haven't missed something andI hadn't.
But they apparently had beenoffered this spot but never got
back to.
Um, got back to the receptionand I said, you know what?
(11:24):
I've only got half an hour, butlet's just see we'll get done
what we can get done.
You've come all this way, let'ssee what we can get organized
anyway.
So they came in and she was likenon-verbal.
But we had, because by thispoint I kind of tapped into my
spiritual gifts.
We had the most amazingnon-verbal conversation I think
(11:45):
I've ever had in my life and herparents were just sitting there
going.
She is so calm.
She's never like this withanybody and I feel like that's
such a thing that a lot ofpeople miss is that there's a
little soul in there that justwants to be heard, right and um,
you know, she'd come in andshe'd just lay on my lap and the
(12:07):
parents are just like who isthis child?
We don't even know.
I said, well, it's just.
I said it's just, I see her, Isee her energy.
Yeah, and then the amount oflittle humans I've had,
especially with autism, thathave seen things.
You know, they sense spirits,they sense all these things and
(12:30):
the parents dismiss it,especially nonverbal children.
I had this one client and healways used to run into the room
screaming his parents bedroomand she and mum didn't know why.
And then when he was talkinglike this was like a good couple
of years later they werelooking in this photo album and
he goes oh, that's him.
And she goes what are youtalking about?
(12:50):
She goes that's the man thatused to come in and scare me in
my bedroom and it turned out itwas a friend of their family
that had died from an overdosein their house.
So he was coming and he wasstill coming, but he had the
words to say it now and um.
So then we were like I was likeit's okay, this happened to a
(13:11):
friend of mine.
I'll get the words to say toclear the house.
I wasn't in my element then, butthen I had, just before I left
my job, I had these few clientsand especially this nonverbal
one, the universe client, thatcame in and she was sitting
there and she's staring up tothe sky.
(13:31):
Yeah, I'm like I can sense hertoo, and her parents are like
what are you talking about?
I said, oh, did one of you havea parent pass away, because
there's like a grandmother here?
And then the dad starts cryingand he goes.
I knew it.
I knew it, he goes because shealways goes up to my mom's photo
and puts her hand on there.
And they had this beautifulconnection and I said, well,
yeah, she's here, and it justadded this whole other layer.
(13:54):
And then I had another clientwho was nonverbal and her mom
knew what I could do.
So I started doing some energyhealing work on her.
And then I was sitting in thisroom and she's like staring, and
what I do sometimes well, no,often what I would do with my
clients was I'd send them justsome energy, saying like, hey,
if you're open, here's somehealing energy If you accept it.
(14:17):
If you don't, you don't becauseI don't like forcing anything
on it'slovely and, um, this angel I
want to say guardian angel,that's the energy of it.
We were tracking both, trackingit across the room, and then
she whispered in my ear andshe's like you're not contracted
to heal her.
And I was like, and I was likethen, what do I do?
(14:41):
And then I'm like, oh, hang on,I'm a speech therapist.
There's plenty I can do, youknow.
But then the funny thing washer mom was so open, so we'd
have these really powerfulconversations.
And then I started working alot energetically on her and her
throat chakra, so the energyaround her throat was really
blocked and every time I clearedit, um, she'd have more words
(15:05):
come.
But then, as I was working withher and I was doing lots of
things to rebalance her littlesystem, um, I got the same
message again and they're likeshe won't speak with you, that's
not part of her journey.
And it's almost like this, um,when, when these little souls
choose to come in the world forsome reason, they choose this
(15:26):
contract where they're not goingto talk for a little bit or
ever, and it's, it's reallyinteresting when you look at it
that it's their choice and youknow, totally agree, and you
know you don't force anything.
Then you just at it, that it'stheir choice, and you know I
totally agree, and you know youdon't force anything.
Then you just allow it to to beand you just accept it and you
think, okay, well, that's forthis little one.
I said to mum look, you knowshe'll really need AAC, so
(15:49):
alternative augmentativecommunication.
I said she's so savvy on likethe iPad.
I said but that's outside myskill set.
You know that's not myexpertise.
And then I said you need tostart looking for someone else
and that can teach her this.
I said I will still work withher and do everything I'm doing,
but you need to find someoneelse.
(16:10):
And she's like.
And then a few months later Isaid you know I'm leaving, you
know I'm finishing up, you knowblah, blah, blah.
And she said did you know, whenyou said this to me, like to go
find another?
I said yes and no.
I said I had it in my heartthat I would never stay.
I said, but I was justgenuinely owning this is my
limit of my skill set and I feelthat's like a trap that a lot
(16:34):
of parents get sucked into.
Is that you get a therapist,that their ego is too big and
won't say when they can't handlesomething or they can't do
something.
And you know, this is part ofhaving your dream team right.
So for me I'm like, no, I can'tdo that, you know, and I used
to be a lot more embedded so Iwould say, hey, I recommend this
person, this person.
But AAC is so specialized so Ididn't really run in those
(16:56):
circles.
I'm like here's a couple maybethat I can think of.
But this little girl who was solooked after by her little
angels, the one that would comeand said to me I'm not meant to
heal her that she got intoimpossible things.
She got into a school thatnormally doesn't accept kids
like her.
She got into, you know, she gotas soon as I left.
(17:18):
Within a couple weeks she was inwith another therapist who
specialized in aac, like allthese things always aligned for
her, and her mom and I were justlike guardian angels are
looking after her a hundredpercent, you know, and it's when
you allow that to happen tooand you don't try and force it,
it's, it's such an importantthing.
And I, you know, and thebiggest thing I did too, um, and
(17:41):
I still do, is I never tell myclients.
They're crazy, or I never tellthem.
They're making it up because Ihave so many gas lit parents and
I'm like, did you mention thisto your doctor?
They're like, oh, oh yeah, theysaid not to worry about it.
I'm like, well, I think it's ared flag and I would really
recommend you go do this andsure enough.
(18:02):
Then they go follow it up andgo oh yeah, you know this is
what's going on.
You know it happened withhearing, it happened with
sensory things, it happened withso many different things and it
still happens.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
You know, even as a person, even without not being a
mom, but you get gaslit all thetime and it's so frustrating
the person, the soul for whothey are and their experience,
and with I, just, I just loveyou.
Love you I just, with theknowledge that they really did
(18:43):
make the choice, like this wastheir choice and this is, yes,
we need to support them on thisjourney, but I think it's like
almost so freeing as a parentfor myself to to know that for
for my kids, because they'regoing to make them.
You know my husband, I have anolder stepdaughter.
She's 25 and she's out on herown, she's got a family and
(19:06):
she's we don't speak and andthat's her decision and journey
and things, and I, we, he, mysorry, my husband always had an
analogy that I loved that we, asthe parents, are the bow and
the children are the arrows, andonce we release this bow into
the or this arrow into the world, the bow is no longer can't,
(19:30):
it's not in control, it's notresponsible, it's none of those
things.
The arrow is going to learn howto be its own bow, send its own
arrows to the world, and it'sgoing to have to come to those
same terms as well that these.
You know we did our best andand then they're on their own
and you know that doesn't.
That is not for every family,obviously, as you met my special
(19:54):
child that will be my foreverhome child and that you know
that's a different set ofstandards, a different set of
everything Life supports, youknow, resources, and it just
really gives you the sense andthe freedom to allow them to be
(20:16):
the human that they are and andwatch, and I like to say guide
as you're following, if thatmakes any sense, but really let
them guide you and just kind ofbe the safeguards you know yeah,
and I guess, like um, from ahealer point of view, a lot of
the time we don't realize thatwhen we shift things in us,
(20:38):
working on ourselves, actuallyshifts things in our children,
and it doesn't matter whetherthey have a diagnosed disability
or not.
Speaker 3 (20:47):
We have this beautiful ability to work on our
own wounds and it actuallyreleases them from that too.
And especially, kids are sogood at reflecting back to us
our own children especially andpushing our buttons, because
they are little mirrors of usand especially children, they're
such emotional radars, right.
So, and I know we were talkingabout before we started
(21:11):
recording, because you'resharing, like I've been having
tech difficulties, you've beenhaving tech difficulties.
And then I was saying, yeah,you know, like, often I'd notice
when the kids were gettingcrazier and I'm like, oh,
there's a full moon coming, andthe parents are like what?
And then they would start tocome in and they're like is
there a full moon?
I'm like there is actually.
(21:32):
They're like, yes, it's so true, you know.
Oh, they're like, yes, it's sotrue, you know.
Oh, my gosh, isn't that thetruth?
Yeah, well, actually, like, ifyou think about it from a
science point of view, the fullmoon is at its most powerful
gravity pull right and when thefull moon happens, it pulls
parasites out of us.
So then the parasites go a bitcrazy, which makes us crazy.
(21:54):
Yeah, so this is like kind ofwhen you start to look into it
what, why it means, what itmeans.
And even you know we're goinginto this period of um mercury
retrograde while we're recordingthis, but we're in the shadow
and mercury retrograde impactstechnology massively
communication, like you sendemails and they don't get there.
(22:16):
That's been my way um travel,so you'll have like disrupted
travel plans, things will getcancelled, there's accidents,
whatever it might be like it.
It all happens during thisperiod.
But the whole idea is it's theenergy, is about going back
within and starting to to lookwhat's going on and finishing
things up right, this is theenergy of it.
It's not about running awayfrom it, but our kids feel that
(22:38):
too, right.
So, yes, you know people willlike go.
Oh, you know, and I'm not astar, I'm not an astrologist,
I'm just aware what goes on umbut you know people will go.
Oh, you know, astrology's allwe're blah blah.
I was like no.
When you actually look into itand look how those energies are
playing out in your life, youget those moments where you're
like, oh, like the full moon.
(23:00):
You know, my husband used towork in security and he's like
every full moon he goes we wouldjust put extra staff on.
You know, like because and evenyou talk to people working
emergency wards and everythinglike that, or the police like it
always be more full on duringthe full moon, um, but that's
full circle.
But when you come back tohealing yourself and being aware
(23:22):
of that and those impacts ofwhat's going on with your child,
there's a thing that it saysthat when you heal something in
you, it heals severalgenerations after and seven
generations before.
So and there's other peoplethat say it's even more than
that, because it's almost likeyou're stopping it.
So if you notice that you're inthis pattern that you inherited
from your parent, and thenyou're doing the same thing with
(23:44):
your child, if you can shiftthat in you and go, well, no,
I'm not doing that anymore, fullstop done, then they don't
inherit that and then theirbehavior shifts and changes it's
amazing.
Speaker 2 (23:56):
I completely agree with that.
My husband and I have both doneall the work that is necessary
for doing both of yeah, all ofthat.
So I couldn't agree more and itit can.
It's so wonderful.
And when you really even startto see the physical changes from
the internal work you're doing,wow, like measuring success.
(24:18):
It's beautiful, absolutelybeautiful.
And you know, I have to tell youthis little story about the
moon because when I reallystarted and I love astrology and
I've always been interested inthings and I'm a massage
therapist, so that goes back tothat also the metaphysical, you
know, understanding, and butwhen DJ was little and we would
(24:41):
have therapy or whatever, therewas often these weeks where he
wouldn't be awake and it wouldjust, you know, we're melatonin
and all of the things you coulddo to try to get him to sleep on
time.
Nothing would work.
And I finally said I just haveto watch what's going on here.
And I stood back and I watchedfor months and I tracked it and
I wrote it down and I realizedhe sleeps just like the moon.
(25:02):
He sleeps two weeks in the dayand two weeks in the night, and
the time changes by one or twohours a day, you know, and it
can fluctuate, it can go backand forth once in a while, but
right now he is awake.
He'll go to sleep at about twoin the afternoon, wake up at
about one or two in the morningor maybe midnight, and then
(25:25):
tomorrow it will be the laterand later and later and later.
So planning things whoaimpossible.
You can't plan much around here, but I've let him sleep on this
.
You know circadian rhythmic,biological clock that he has for
eight years at least.
(25:46):
Now he is healthy, he's happy,he, you know, obviously he was
upset about a toy missing, butwho's not upset when they lose
things?
Every human, but his actualdaily, his energy, everything
about him is so peaceful and isso healthy and happy.
(26:08):
And I couldn't ask for anythingmore.
And it's because I honored thiscrazy.
And what's funny is that out ofthis came my husband's diagnosis
in this during this sleeptracking time, because I also
realized here's this man whoI've never gone to a restaurant
(26:29):
with in almost 15 it's been 20years now, but at the time about
15 years because he doesn'tlike to see or hear or be around
people eating.
It's horrible for him.
Ding, ding, ding.
His sleep patterns were fivehours on, you know, 15 hours
awake, five hours of sleep,whatever.
It was never like this eighthours sleep period.
(26:51):
It was always these twodifferent time periods in the
day that he would sleep.
That's madness.
Yeah right, it looks likemadness from the outside, but
when I started realizing it andthinking and that's sometimes
when he gets tired in theafternoon I'll say you need to
just go sleep.
It's no, we don't need to hangout.
You know, everything's no FOMOhere.
(27:11):
Like reset, reset your body.
This is your, this is yourreset cycle and you need to do
it.
And that's what happens everynow.
We're so well practiced intolistening to ourselves and
following our own body's needsthat it's like so natural.
And it looks like a crazy houseprobably to other people
(27:34):
looking in.
But who?
Speaker 3 (27:36):
cares.
But I think, sarah, you bringup such a good point.
It's like you have to honorwhat's right for you and your
family and you know, this issomething I really champion is,
don't live in the box a societyexpects you to live in.
Because you know, even for me,like we needed money and we had
two cars and my husband's likewe can live on one car, I was
(27:57):
like, oh, yeah, we can live onone car.
So we sold a car.
Yeah, oh yeah, we can live onone car.
So we sold a car, you know, and, um, you know, and now we're
like selling our house to moveup closer to a beach and people
like, oh, but you built thathouse and it's so beautiful.
It's like, yeah, but it's notserving us, it's not giving us
what we want, you know.
So, yeah, we did do all that,but at the same time, we're
(28:17):
ready to move on.
This is like this part of ourjourney's done.
We, we did the dream and we'removing on now, you know, and it
always comes back to what isright for you and what is right
for your body and what is rightfor your family and what is
right for you, and learning totrust your intuition and your
mummy gut instincts with thatyou know so often I'd have
(28:37):
parents come in.
I mean at our, in which schoolto go to.
I'm like, well, go visit them.
They're like what do you mean?
I said, go visit them and feelinto it and notice what's in the
classroom.
And they're like what do youmean?
I said, go look at theclassroom.
If you can see beautifulartwork and you feel like the
kids are really engaged, maybethat's the place for your child.
(29:00):
If you go into the classroom,that's void of any life.
Maybe that's not the place foryour child.
If you go into the classroom,that's void of any life.
Maybe that's not the place foryour child.
And you know.
But I said, but then your childmight be a child that doesn't
want all the stimulation andwants the empty classroom.
I said, so go in there and feel.
And you know, now kids inAustralia have less choice.
But back then you could put likeyour three choices for what
(29:20):
support class you wanted yourchild to go into, and and half
the time the parents would comeback and go oh my goodness, I'm
so glad I went to visit thatplace because I would never send
my child there.
I was like I know that.
I said I know that because I'veworked in there, but I didn't
want to tell you.
I wanted you to come up withyour own decisions, you know.
So, um, you know, and it wasfunny because I was working in
(29:44):
schools a lot too when I wouldsee both sides of things and I
could like it was I got.
I was very privy to a lot ofthings that people didn't
understand.
So I'm like, nope, go in, trustyour gut, you know, and so
often, um, especially schoolsthat were good schools, they'd
have a change in the leadership.
You know, like the headmasteror the principal would change
(30:04):
and then it was no longer a goodschool.
Because I'm like, well, youcan't control that, you know.
So, just being really consciousof that and honoring that and,
you know, feeling that too, like, okay, this school served my
child for this long but it's nolonger working.
What are my options?
You know, and alwaysremembering you have a choice, I
think, too, is really important, because a lot of parents think
(30:25):
, oh well, it's just too hard.
It's like, yeah, but will it beworth it in the longterm to get
through that?
Speaker 2 (30:33):
And I couldn't agree more Like.
I will tell you a situationwhere my gut you know, there was
only two autism schoolsbasically here in Salt Lake City
at the time, and one was inindustrial area, downtown and
the other one is in a city aboutan hour and 15 minutes away.
(30:57):
So what?
Obviously we're going tounfortunately choose the closer
one which is also in like a notso great area.
My gut told me from the get gono, this is not good.
And but everyone was like, yes,this is an autism, this is
exactly for DJ.
This, oh, how exciting.
And you have to give it a try.
You have to.
You know, my husband, my mom,like the teachers, everybody I
(31:24):
knew from that moment I readthat email and that gut feeling
I had, I knew and I carried itthat whole time through the
whole summer and all the testing, all to find out, because DJ,
at the time he was speakingmultiple languages, he was
speaking Italian and he was inthird grade speaking Italian,
doing long division on thewhiteboard in like you know,
(31:47):
crazy fashion.
And this woman was like, okay,we're going to get him in this
like 10th grade classroom withand that's where his academics
were at the time was at a 10thgrade level.
Because this is a totallydifferent beast we're dealing
with here with a high high.
Because this is a totallydifferent beast we're dealing
with here with a high high,highly educated, academic kid
with a low behavioral you know,reciprocative yeah, social
(32:10):
behavior system.
And so we, we had it all.
It was going to be beautiful,it was going to figure it all
out.
Show up the first day of school.
They had just built a highschool as well, so they sent all
the staff at the school thatwe're ready to go to to this
high school.
Not one person knows us, theydon't know our name, they don't
know his academic schools.
(32:31):
They literally put him in athird grade classroom, third
grade academic, third grade,everything.
He was beside himself because,of course, nothing is the way he
was going.
He left the school so manytimes in the first two days and
finally it was like the thirdday that I was there.
Literally the universedisconnected my battery from my
(32:56):
truck so that I could sit thereand watch how many children
would leave this school withoutadults knowing Time, like child
after child running away fromthis school All autistic
children by the way, this is theonly autistic school in the
industrial neighborhood of ourcity and I just was like I can't
(33:18):
believe this is happening.
I can't, we can't do this.
I went straight back and toldmy husband we can't lose, this
is happening.
I can't, we can't do this.
You know, went straight backand told my husband, like we
can't lose him, Like this isn'twork.
And so at that point everybodywas like, oh my gosh, you, how
could you have known?
Speaker 3 (33:31):
and I was like, ah, so I did, intuition told me.
Speaker 2 (33:36):
Yeah, listen, that is the point.
Like everyone else that islistening, please don't go down
the road.
I had to go down.
You know, we spent our wholesummer at this place.
We wasted so much time that wecould have been doing other
things for nothing.
That good that came out of itreally.
(33:57):
You know, just now, I guess,information for everybody else
now I guess information foreverybody else?
Speaker 3 (34:05):
yeah, and I guess too , sarah.
It's just like you know.
This is the thing likeintuition is to be acted upon,
not to be put in the drawer, andit's all about really trusting
that.
And you, if you feelsomething's not right with your
child and everyone telling youno, keep looking for till
someone listens to you and saysyes.
You know, and even I've got afriend at the moment and she's
(34:28):
going through this nasty lawcase but at the same time she
has this genuine fear and shepaid she had to pay this money
for a very expensive solicitorto look over her case and she
said it was so worth it becausethat person, in the first five
minutes she was there, validatedall her concerns and she didn't
(34:49):
even have to express them, youknow, like all the things that
she needed to flag, and she saidit was worth the money purely
to be validated and to be heard,you know, and to be understood.
You know, because so often thatgoes unsaid.
You know, um, even I've hadclients come in from like a
intuitive healing point of viewand they're like, oh, this is
(35:10):
going on.
I'm like, oh, yeah, I can feelthat.
And they're like, really,because my doctor's saying
there's no reason for it andblah, blah, blah, and I'm like,
oh no, that's definitely goingon for you.
I said let's see why and thenwe'll unpack that, you know, and
do some healing work and energywork on that and shift it.
And they're like, oh, my gosh,and sometimes just the mirror,
like someone else acknowledgingit, can be enough to shift it in
(35:32):
itself too, because you knowit's not.
You suddenly don't feel likeyou're crazy anymore.
So you haven't got this chargedenergy around it making you
feel like you're crazy, yeah.
Speaker 2 (35:42):
And you know what?
It's interesting?
My brain just told me thatthose people literally couldn't
give you the reflection backbecause they didn't have the
ability to do so, so you weren'tgoing to, you weren't going to
get it from them anyways.
That's yeah, that's so, that'sso incredible, and and it's now,
now that I maybe it will beeasier for me when I come into
(36:03):
those people, to not worry aboutpushing forward and just hi,
yeah, you're not for me, quicklyand easily, yes, exactly.
Speaker 3 (36:13):
Yeah, and it's even outgrowing people too.
So even therapists that youthink or felt were like the
right fit, sometimes you change,they change, you all change,
and it's about being reallywilling to be open to changing
from that and going okay, thesepeople don't serve me anymore.
I'm gonna shift and be okaywith that, you know.
(36:34):
And and if they're the rightprofessional or the right
support for you, they let yougrow, they let you go, and you
know, and that that's who youwant in your life.
You want people that know thatyou can go back there if you
really need to.
But in the end, if your gutsaying, without growing this
place or we're not meant to bedoing this anymore, and your
(36:54):
heart saying no, no, no, youneed to listen, because the more
you listen to that, the moreyou're going to be in tune with
that and and then it will allowyou to be more in tune with your
life too.
Speaker 2 (37:04):
A hundred percent.
That is so true.
Now, are you doing practicejust there in Australia, or are
you doing it globally, um online, where everyone can reach you?
Speaker 3 (37:15):
No, I work online mostly.
So, um, I have a handful ofclients that will come in, but
most of what I do isenergetically online and because
the universe has thesebeautiful things where you can
still connect with peopleenergetically because it's all
energy yeah, so I work withpeople all over the world and
it's really amazing.
(37:35):
Actually, my first clients werein America, which was the whole
funny irony of everything.
Speaker 4 (37:40):
Oh, I love that.
Speaker 3 (37:43):
Yeah, and I'm very familiar about.
I'm not good at it, but I knowabout juggling time zones and
I'm very grateful.
Websites yeah, exactly Exactly.
Speaker 2 (37:56):
So nice.
Um, I put it up on the screenfor those of you who can't see,
though willowhealingorg.
Willowhealingorg that's whereyou can go and, um, check out
the.
I guess just check out thewebsite and see what types of of
services or resources thatmight be able to fit you, or if
(38:18):
there's someone in your familyor close to you that you think
would resonate with thatinformation, please pass that on
.
That is the most important partof this journey is sharing the
information, which is why we'rehere.
Essentially right, it's becausewe want to share this with all
of the right people and all ofthe right families.
(38:39):
It's been so great to get toknow you.
I hope we can stay in touch.
I just love your energy and Ithink that it was.
It was just such a specialepisode today and I really
appreciate you coming.
Speaker 3 (38:54):
Thank, you, sarah, and thank you for having me.
And I just want to put thecaveat to that.
If you're like, oh, what can Ihave for healing?
I work with kids too, andsometimes kids are the most
amazing things and they don'tand especially because of my
background, the children don'thave to stay in the picture.
I can just they can come in andthen they can go be themselves.
(39:16):
Because I find sometimes as aparent, we think, oh, how could
we possibly do that?
But once we tapped in and wekind of get that sole permission
, they can go, do whatever theywant, and I've had clients do
that.
They'll peer on the screen fora second and then they'll go and
I'm like, okay, perfect, we'redone.
Yeah, and if people want to getto know me more, you can find
(39:37):
me on Instagram as well withWillow Healy and then SH at the
end me on Instagram as well withWillow.
Speaker 2 (39:44):
Healy and then SH at the end, and you'll just see my
beautiful face every day.
I love that.
I'll be sure to make sure tofollow for sure and put all the
links in the description of theepisode which will be coming out
in the next three weeks,possibly pretty soon.
So, yeah, if you are inAustralia, keep warm and if
(40:05):
you're here in the U S, staycool, cause it is ridiculous
right now.
And yeah, oh, it was just sonice to catch up with you and
and I hope that, um, we can, youknow, stay in touch and I'd
love to see how we can worktogether in the future for some
of the events that I hold andstuff, because I love including
(40:27):
my global advocate friends inthose events as much as possible
.
Speaker 3 (40:31):
I would love that, sarah, and thank you so much for
having me.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
Yes, thanks for being here.
Speaker 4 (40:36):
We'll definitely be in touch shining bright, oh yeah
(41:00):
, stories of love and courageall throughout the night, her
voice resonating an anthem forall.
Through the trials and trials,she answers the call.
Her mother and her fighter,breaking barriers and stride.
Her love is her guide, she'llnever hide.
She's changing the world foryou With her heart and speech
(41:24):
and strong Empathies and melody.
In her journey we all belong.
Followers gather like stars inthe night.
So bright 44,000 voices sharingin the light.
She stands for family advocatesfor more.
(41:45):
44,000 voices sharing in thelight.
She stands for family advocatesfor more.
Movement of compassion.
Ways of the soul Podcast.
Together, symphony of supportCreating life changing report.
She's changing the world foryou With a heart that's fierce
and strong.
Hypothese a melody Thank you,and love you dearly need.
(42:20):
She's changing the world foryou With a heart that's fierce
and strong, empathies andmelodies, and a journey we all
(42:43):
belong.
The SJ Child Show is Backford's 13th season.
Join Sarah Bradford and the SJChild Show team as they explore
the world of autism and sharestories of hope and inspiration.
This season we're excited tobring you more autism summits
featuring experts and advocatesfrom around the world.
Go to sjchildsorg to donate andto get more information.
(00:25):
Congratulations on 2024's20,000 downloads and 300
episodes.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Hi, we are back at the SJ Childs show today and I'm
so excited to have my friendwho is in the future.
I love Australians Coming fromthe future.
I love Australians Coming fromthe future, my new friend that
I'm making, catherine, and is itKristani?
Speaker 3 (00:53):
Kristani, perfect, perfect.
Speaker 2 (00:54):
Kristani, and I'm so excited to talk to you today
about your practice andsomething that we both have a
lot of passion and in common.
And yeah, before we get started, please introduce yourself.
Tell us a little bit aboutyourself and what brought you
here today.
Speaker 3 (01:14):
Hey, sarah, so I'm a leadership coach, intuitive
healer, podcaster as well, andan author and a speaker, and but
my background is as a speechlanguage pathologist and I'm
really passionate about workingwith children and mums from both
sides of the spectrum spectrumbut both sides of ends because,
(01:36):
you know, it's so often that weneglect being the mum part of
things, especially when you'reholding that space for children,
especially children withdisabilities.
But, um, I, when I contactedyou, it was like I need to share
my stories because I've had somany amazing experiences, nearly
20 years as a speech therapist,so you know, um, and most of my
(01:58):
caseload was children withautism.
So that is how I landed in thisspace today and it's funny
because now I'm actuallyfocusing on the mom side of
things to help shift the thingswith children.
So it's been such a journey anda flip in itself.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
And you know, sometimes that's what happens in
.
You see where the lack ofsupport is, in.
You know a genre or an areathat needs more tools and more
resources.
And, boy, do moms really needthat help to refigure where
(02:37):
their mindset is going.
Because, as I'm probably sureyou're going to say in this
conversation, that a lot of itcomes back down to what are you
thinking, what are you?
What are you, what is yourbrain saying to you when you
first wake up in the morning?
What are the patterns you'regoing to be setting for yourself
?
So we haven't had thisconversation before, but just in
case that might be what we'retalking about, I know that's,
(02:59):
you know, real for me.
And, um, I think that it's suchan important part of our
journey to have resources, tohave people we can not only
learn from lean on, listen tothey, listen, you know, kind of
give back and do the same forothers.
(03:20):
It's such a beautiful symbioticrelationship, isn't it?
Speaker 3 (03:24):
Yeah, exactly, and I think you brought up a very good
point, sarah is that you needsupport and you need a dream
team that's what my coach callsit, your dream team because
we're not meant to do this alone.
But then when you add in a childwith a disability, it makes it
incredibly more vital for you tohave that support and respite
(03:47):
and to be able to have thosemoments for yourself, because
it's not being selfish, becausesometimes we just need to fill
our cup back up.
You know, and my beautifulcoach calls it being self-full.
You know, because if you don'tfill up your own cup and let
that overflow, then you're goingto have no energy left to keep
working and showing up as a mum.
(04:08):
And you know, once someone saidto me the universe only gives
us what we can handle, and Ihaven't met a mum yet that can't
, you know, address all theneeds of her child.
Yes, it gets hard, yes, it'sreally extreme, but at the same
time they find a way to make itwork and I think that's a mom's
superpower.
(04:28):
You know the things that momscan get done.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
It's just mind-blowing when we figure out
how to do universal payment formoms right, that's what we need,
payment for being a mom right,learn here.
Here's the support.
But no, it is so true that thisand the lack of support that
you feel kind of at thatbeginning of the journey, when
(04:55):
you are at your pediatricians,you're at your school
psychologist, whatever, andyou're getting that news for the
first time and you feeloverwhelmed and sometimes a
little bit in doubt of yourselfand in doubt of your future, and
I think that being able to thenhave this ladder to climb, this
(05:20):
bridge to cross and have a handto hold to do that, it seems so
much less scary and you get alittle bit of a foothold in,
maybe, where you will be heading.
You know, and each family andeach situation is so
individually different.
Yeah, especially as a speechpathologist, you have seen every
(05:44):
type of of, you know,communication yeah and um very
early on in my career.
Speaker 3 (05:53):
So as a new graduate, my first job, I had 18 children
with autism on my caseload andI had two hours at university on
autism and I had no support andI was like I need to go up
skill and you know so I didn't.
I didn't shy away from it, Iwent.
(06:14):
There's obviously a reason whyum, this is kind of happening.
So I went and invested in myown training and that sort of
thing and don't get me some ofthe training I did.
I was like this is bogusbecause, you know, I like to
have a holistic point of viewfor all my clients.
I think that's why they likedme, because I wouldn't say I'd
be like the one going.
(06:35):
Have you seen a chiropractor?
Have you considered this?
Have you done this?
Have you looked into diet, haveyou?
You know, because that was myextent of my knowledge base.
But at the same time, you know,I remember sitting in this um
workshop and they were talkingabout um.
I actually brought up thequestion.
I was like do you feel dietimpacts?
Oh no, there's no evidence forthat.
(06:57):
And blah, blah, blah, blah,blah.
And I'm just sitting theregoing.
But I have children who andthis isn't a one I'm emphasizing
it's not a one-stop shop, right, because we're all unique,
children are all unique.
But I've had a lot of childrengo off gluten and their
behavior's completely changed.
Or I've had a lot of children,you know, cut out the
preservatives and theirbehavior's completely changed.
You know, I've had all thisevidence.
(07:18):
I'm like I've had kids go onsupplements for, you know, zinc
or B vitamins, and then they'vestarted talking.
And it's not a miracle one-stopshop.
It really depends on what yourbody's doing.
But then for her to sit thereat the front of this very early
on in my career, and I'm likethis doesn't feel right.
Like part of me went oh, yeah,yeah, yeah, yeah.
(07:40):
And then I was like no, like Idon't agree with that, you know.
So it was like continuallyquestioning what was coming
through.
But then, after about two orthree years, I started my own.
Well, I bought into my practicethat I was working for, so I
started this businesspartnership and my whole
caseload was children withautism.
(08:01):
And I'm like, how did thishappen?
And as a therapist, it can beactually quite extreme having a
week like that, because youactually don't get a moment to
breathe, so I get a child withjust a lisp come in and I'd be
like, okay, all right, you knowwe can turn um.
But it got to the point thatwhen a child walked in my door,
even if I'd never met them, I'dknow straight away if they had
(08:24):
um a diagnosis or not.
Yeah, and I was usually the onethat broke it to the parents
and I I knew how it would go andI'm like, look, I need to share
with you what my feelings are.
I said, and you're gonna hateme, and then you're gonna go and
google it, and then you'regonna come back and you're going
to say thank you and and you'regoing to be.
And they said no like, no, no,so, and nine times out of ten
(08:49):
that's exactly what happened,and because at this point I was
like we need to get your childthe most help we need, I need
I'm going to rip the band-aidoff.
You know, and we also wentthrough this stage in Australia
where, um, a lot ofpediatricians were refusing to
diagnose because there was athing saying that it was over
diagnosed.
But I honestly did not have asingle child that I went.
(09:11):
I don't think they're on thespectrum.
I didn't have a single one likethat.
So I'm like where is this overdiagnosis crap coming from,
rather than actually starting toquestion why are the numbers
increasing?
That question was never asked,right, so you know.
And then, um, so, being part ofall that, and then in Australia
this funding came in, um calledthe National Disability
(09:35):
Insurance Scheme and the areathat I was working in, we were a
pilot project for that, so youcould imagine the paperwork,
legalities and the nightmaresthat we learnt being all through
that and everything.
And it's really interestingbecause now I've left the
profession, I'm so grateful tonot have to deal with any of
that in my background.
(09:56):
Yeah, you know, but it was justthat shifting and how different
children can be.
And I would always get reallyfrustrated and I still do when
people go oh, they're just likethis child.
I'm like no, they're not.
And I feel that that's such animportant piece of the puzzle
that every little soul thatcomes and sees you is unique.
(10:17):
You know they all have their.
It doesn't matter if they'resimilar to another child.
They'll have something that'sdifferent.
You know they might remind youof someone else, but at the same
time you have to go in with aunique scope lens of like okay,
who am I?
Who am I seeing right in frontof me?
You know, and I had this beauty.
I called her my, my gift, mygift from the universe, client.
(10:40):
So at this time I'd like soldmy company and I was working in
the company I was still workingfor the company and it wasn't
doing as well and I was workingon commission and I was like, oh
, I could really use some extramoney this way.
It could be so cool if I had anassessment.
And I had no room on mytimetable for an assessment.
I have like this half hour gap.
(11:01):
And anyway, this parent showsup in the waiting room and I was
like, oh, can I help you?
And they're like, oh, yeah,we're booked in for an
assessment.
I'm like, let me just go doublecheck.
I haven't missed something andI hadn't.
But they apparently had beenoffered this spot but never got
back to.
Um, got back to the receptionand I said, you know what?
(11:24):
I've only got half an hour, butlet's just see we'll get done
what we can get done.
You've come all this way, let'ssee what we can get organized
anyway.
So they came in and she was likenon-verbal.
But we had, because by thispoint I kind of tapped into my
spiritual gifts.
We had the most amazingnon-verbal conversation I think
(11:45):
I've ever had in my life and herparents were just sitting there
going.
She is so calm.
She's never like this withanybody and I feel like that's
such a thing that a lot ofpeople miss is that there's a
little soul in there that justwants to be heard, right and um,
you know, she'd come in andshe'd just lay on my lap and the
(12:07):
parents are just like who isthis child?
We don't even know.
I said, well, it's just.
I said it's just, I see her, Isee her energy.
Yeah, and then the amount oflittle humans I've had,
especially with autism, thathave seen things.
You know, they sense spirits,they sense all these things and
(12:30):
the parents dismiss it,especially nonverbal children.
I had this one client and healways used to run into the room
screaming his parents bedroomand she and mum didn't know why.
And then when he was talkinglike this was like a good couple
of years later they werelooking in this photo album and
he goes oh, that's him.
And she goes what are youtalking about?
(12:50):
She goes that's the man thatused to come in and scare me in
my bedroom and it turned out itwas a friend of their family
that had died from an overdosein their house.
So he was coming and he wasstill coming, but he had the
words to say it now and um.
So then we were like I was likeit's okay, this happened to a
(13:11):
friend of mine.
I'll get the words to say toclear the house.
I wasn't in my element then, butthen I had, just before I left
my job, I had these few clientsand especially this nonverbal
one, the universe client, thatcame in and she was sitting
there and she's staring up tothe sky.
(13:31):
Yeah, I'm like I can sense hertoo, and her parents are like
what are you talking about?
I said, oh, did one of you havea parent pass away, because
there's like a grandmother here?
And then the dad starts cryingand he goes.
I knew it.
I knew it, he goes because shealways goes up to my mom's photo
and puts her hand on there.
And they had this beautifulconnection and I said, well,
yeah, she's here, and it justadded this whole other layer.
(13:54):
And then I had another clientwho was nonverbal and her mom
knew what I could do.
So I started doing some energyhealing work on her.
And then I was sitting in thisroom and she's like staring, and
what I do sometimes well, no,often what I would do with my
clients was I'd send them justsome energy, saying like, hey,
if you're open, here's somehealing energy If you accept it.
(14:17):
If you don't, you don't becauseI don't like forcing anything
on it'slovely and, um, this angel I
want to say guardian angel,that's the energy of it.
We were tracking both, trackingit across the room, and then
she whispered in my ear andshe's like you're not contracted
to heal her.
And I was like, and I was likethen, what do I do?
(14:41):
And then I'm like, oh, hang on,I'm a speech therapist.
There's plenty I can do, youknow.
But then the funny thing washer mom was so open, so we'd
have these really powerfulconversations.
And then I started working alot energetically on her and her
throat chakra, so the energyaround her throat was really
blocked and every time I clearedit, um, she'd have more words
(15:05):
come.
But then, as I was working withher and I was doing lots of
things to rebalance her littlesystem, um, I got the same
message again and they're likeshe won't speak with you, that's
not part of her journey.
And it's almost like this, um,when, when these little souls
choose to come in the world forsome reason, they choose this
(15:26):
contract where they're not goingto talk for a little bit or
ever, and it's, it's reallyinteresting when you look at it
that it's their choice and youknow, totally agree, and you
know you don't force anything.
Then you just at it, that it'stheir choice, and you know I
totally agree, and you know youdon't force anything.
Then you just allow it to to beand you just accept it and you
think, okay, well, that's forthis little one.
I said to mum look, you knowshe'll really need AAC, so
(15:49):
alternative augmentativecommunication.
I said she's so savvy on likethe iPad.
I said but that's outside myskill set.
You know that's not myexpertise.
And then I said you need tostart looking for someone else
and that can teach her this.
I said I will still work withher and do everything I'm doing,
but you need to find someoneelse.
(16:10):
And she's like.
And then a few months later Isaid you know I'm leaving, you
know I'm finishing up, you knowblah, blah, blah.
And she said did you know, whenyou said this to me, like to go
find another?
I said yes and no.
I said I had it in my heartthat I would never stay.
I said, but I was justgenuinely owning this is my
limit of my skill set and I feelthat's like a trap that a lot
(16:34):
of parents get sucked into.
Is that you get a therapist,that their ego is too big and
won't say when they can't handlesomething or they can't do
something.
And you know, this is part ofhaving your dream team right.
So for me I'm like, no, I can'tdo that, you know, and I used
to be a lot more embedded so Iwould say, hey, I recommend this
person, this person.
But AAC is so specialized so Ididn't really run in those
(16:56):
circles.
I'm like here's a couple maybethat I can think of.
But this little girl who was solooked after by her little
angels, the one that would comeand said to me I'm not meant to
heal her that she got intoimpossible things.
She got into a school thatnormally doesn't accept kids
like her.
She got into, you know, she gotas soon as I left.
(17:18):
Within a couple weeks she was inwith another therapist who
specialized in aac, like allthese things always aligned for
her, and her mom and I were justlike guardian angels are
looking after her a hundredpercent, you know, and it's when
you allow that to happen tooand you don't try and force it,
it's, it's such an importantthing.
And I, you know, and thebiggest thing I did too, um, and
(17:41):
I still do, is I never tell myclients.
They're crazy, or I never tellthem.
They're making it up because Ihave so many gas lit parents and
I'm like, did you mention thisto your doctor?
They're like, oh, oh yeah, theysaid not to worry about it.
I'm like, well, I think it's ared flag and I would really
recommend you go do this andsure enough.
(18:02):
Then they go follow it up andgo oh yeah, you know this is
what's going on.
You know it happened withhearing, it happened with
sensory things, it happened withso many different things and it
still happens.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
You know, even as a person, even without not being a
mom, but you get gaslit all thetime and it's so frustrating
the person, the soul for whothey are and their experience,
and with I, just, I just loveyou.
Love you I just, with theknowledge that they really did
(18:43):
make the choice, like this wastheir choice and this is, yes,
we need to support them on thisjourney, but I think it's like
almost so freeing as a parentfor myself to to know that for
for my kids, because they'regoing to make them.
You know my husband, I have anolder stepdaughter.
She's 25 and she's out on herown, she's got a family and
(19:06):
she's we don't speak and andthat's her decision and journey
and things, and I, we, he, mysorry, my husband always had an
analogy that I loved that we, asthe parents, are the bow and
the children are the arrows, andonce we release this bow into
the or this arrow into the world, the bow is no longer can't,
(19:30):
it's not in control, it's notresponsible, it's none of those
things.
The arrow is going to learn howto be its own bow, send its own
arrows to the world, and it'sgoing to have to come to those
same terms as well that these.
You know we did our best andand then they're on their own
and you know that doesn't.
That is not for every family,obviously, as you met my special
(19:54):
child that will be my foreverhome child and that you know
that's a different set ofstandards, a different set of
everything Life supports, youknow, resources, and it just
really gives you the sense andthe freedom to allow them to be
(20:16):
the human that they are and andwatch, and I like to say guide
as you're following, if thatmakes any sense, but really let
them guide you and just kind ofbe the safeguards you know yeah,
and I guess, like um, from ahealer point of view, a lot of
the time we don't realize thatwhen we shift things in us,
(20:38):
working on ourselves, actuallyshifts things in our children,
and it doesn't matter whetherthey have a diagnosed disability
or not.
Speaker 3 (20:47):
We have this beautiful ability to work on our
own wounds and it actuallyreleases them from that too.
And especially, kids are sogood at reflecting back to us
our own children especially andpushing our buttons, because
they are little mirrors of usand especially children, they're
such emotional radars, right.
So, and I know we were talkingabout before we started
(21:11):
recording, because you'resharing, like I've been having
tech difficulties, you've beenhaving tech difficulties.
And then I was saying, yeah,you know, like, often I'd notice
when the kids were gettingcrazier and I'm like, oh,
there's a full moon coming, andthe parents are like what?
And then they would start tocome in and they're like is
there a full moon?
I'm like there is actually.
(21:32):
They're like, yes, it's so true, you know.
Oh, they're like, yes, it's sotrue, you know.
Oh, my gosh, isn't that thetruth?
Yeah, well, actually, like, ifyou think about it from a
science point of view, the fullmoon is at its most powerful
gravity pull right and when thefull moon happens, it pulls
parasites out of us.
So then the parasites go a bitcrazy, which makes us crazy.
(21:54):
Yeah, so this is like kind ofwhen you start to look into it
what, why it means, what itmeans.
And even you know we're goinginto this period of um mercury
retrograde while we're recordingthis, but we're in the shadow
and mercury retrograde impactstechnology massively
communication, like you sendemails and they don't get there.
(22:16):
That's been my way um travel,so you'll have like disrupted
travel plans, things will getcancelled, there's accidents,
whatever it might be like it.
It all happens during thisperiod.
But the whole idea is it's theenergy, is about going back
within and starting to to lookwhat's going on and finishing
things up right, this is theenergy of it.
It's not about running awayfrom it, but our kids feel that
(22:38):
too, right.
So, yes, you know people willlike go.
Oh, you know, and I'm not astar, I'm not an astrologist,
I'm just aware what goes on umbut you know people will go.
Oh, you know, astrology's allwe're blah blah.
I was like no.
When you actually look into itand look how those energies are
playing out in your life, youget those moments where you're
like, oh, like the full moon.
(23:00):
You know, my husband used towork in security and he's like
every full moon he goes we wouldjust put extra staff on.
You know, like because and evenyou talk to people working
emergency wards and everythinglike that, or the police like it
always be more full on duringthe full moon, um, but that's
full circle.
But when you come back tohealing yourself and being aware
(23:22):
of that and those impacts ofwhat's going on with your child,
there's a thing that it saysthat when you heal something in
you, it heals severalgenerations after and seven
generations before.
So and there's other peoplethat say it's even more than
that, because it's almost likeyou're stopping it.
So if you notice that you're inthis pattern that you inherited
from your parent, and thenyou're doing the same thing with
(23:44):
your child, if you can shiftthat in you and go, well, no,
I'm not doing that anymore, fullstop done, then they don't
inherit that and then theirbehavior shifts and changes it's
amazing.
Speaker 2 (23:56):
I completely agree with that.
My husband and I have both doneall the work that is necessary
for doing both of yeah, all ofthat.
So I couldn't agree more and itit can.
It's so wonderful.
And when you really even startto see the physical changes from
the internal work you're doing,wow, like measuring success.
(24:18):
It's beautiful, absolutelybeautiful.
And you know, I have to tell youthis little story about the
moon because when I reallystarted and I love astrology and
I've always been interested inthings and I'm a massage
therapist, so that goes back tothat also the metaphysical, you
know, understanding, and butwhen DJ was little and we would
(24:41):
have therapy or whatever, therewas often these weeks where he
wouldn't be awake and it wouldjust, you know, we're melatonin
and all of the things you coulddo to try to get him to sleep on
time.
Nothing would work.
And I finally said I just haveto watch what's going on here.
And I stood back and I watchedfor months and I tracked it and
I wrote it down and I realizedhe sleeps just like the moon.
(25:02):
He sleeps two weeks in the dayand two weeks in the night, and
the time changes by one or twohours a day, you know, and it
can fluctuate, it can go backand forth once in a while, but
right now he is awake.
He'll go to sleep at about twoin the afternoon, wake up at
about one or two in the morningor maybe midnight, and then
(25:25):
tomorrow it will be the laterand later and later and later.
So planning things whoaimpossible.
You can't plan much around here, but I've let him sleep on this
.
You know circadian rhythmic,biological clock that he has for
eight years at least.
(25:46):
Now he is healthy, he's happy,he, you know, obviously he was
upset about a toy missing, butwho's not upset when they lose
things?
Every human, but his actualdaily, his energy, everything
about him is so peaceful and isso healthy and happy.
(26:08):
And I couldn't ask for anythingmore.
And it's because I honored thiscrazy.
And what's funny is that out ofthis came my husband's diagnosis
in this during this sleeptracking time, because I also
realized here's this man whoI've never gone to a restaurant
(26:29):
with in almost 15 it's been 20years now, but at the time about
15 years because he doesn'tlike to see or hear or be around
people eating.
It's horrible for him.
Ding, ding, ding.
His sleep patterns were fivehours on, you know, 15 hours
awake, five hours of sleep,whatever.
It was never like this eighthours sleep period.
(26:51):
It was always these twodifferent time periods in the
day that he would sleep.
That's madness.
Yeah right, it looks likemadness from the outside, but
when I started realizing it andthinking and that's sometimes
when he gets tired in theafternoon I'll say you need to
just go sleep.
It's no, we don't need to hangout.
You know, everything's no FOMOhere.
(27:11):
Like reset, reset your body.
This is your, this is yourreset cycle and you need to do
it.
And that's what happens everynow.
We're so well practiced intolistening to ourselves and
following our own body's needsthat it's like so natural.
And it looks like a crazy houseprobably to other people
(27:34):
looking in.
But who?
Speaker 3 (27:36):
cares.
But I think, sarah, you bringup such a good point.
It's like you have to honorwhat's right for you and your
family and you know, this issomething I really champion is,
don't live in the box a societyexpects you to live in.
Because you know, even for me,like we needed money and we had
two cars and my husband's likewe can live on one car, I was
(27:57):
like, oh, yeah, we can live onone car.
So we sold a car.
Yeah, oh yeah, we can live onone car.
So we sold a car, you know, and, um, you know, and now we're
like selling our house to moveup closer to a beach and people
like, oh, but you built thathouse and it's so beautiful.
It's like, yeah, but it's notserving us, it's not giving us
what we want, you know.
So, yeah, we did do all that,but at the same time, we're
(28:17):
ready to move on.
This is like this part of ourjourney's done.
We, we did the dream and we'removing on now, you know, and it
always comes back to what isright for you and what is right
for your body and what is rightfor your family and what is
right for you, and learning totrust your intuition and your
mummy gut instincts with thatyou know so often I'd have
(28:37):
parents come in.
I mean at our, in which schoolto go to.
I'm like, well, go visit them.
They're like what do you mean?
I said, go visit them and feelinto it and notice what's in the
classroom.
And they're like what do youmean?
I said, go look at theclassroom.
If you can see beautifulartwork and you feel like the
kids are really engaged, maybethat's the place for your child.
(29:00):
If you go into the classroom,that's void of any life.
Maybe that's not the place foryour child.
If you go into the classroom,that's void of any life.
Maybe that's not the place foryour child.
And you know.
But I said, but then your childmight be a child that doesn't
want all the stimulation andwants the empty classroom.
I said, so go in there and feel.
And you know, now kids inAustralia have less choice.
But back then you could put likeyour three choices for what
(29:20):
support class you wanted yourchild to go into, and and half
the time the parents would comeback and go oh my goodness, I'm
so glad I went to visit thatplace because I would never send
my child there.
I was like I know that.
I said I know that because I'veworked in there, but I didn't
want to tell you.
I wanted you to come up withyour own decisions, you know.
So, um, you know, and it wasfunny because I was working in
(29:44):
schools a lot too when I wouldsee both sides of things and I
could like it was I got.
I was very privy to a lot ofthings that people didn't
understand.
So I'm like, nope, go in, trustyour gut, you know, and so
often, um, especially schoolsthat were good schools, they'd
have a change in the leadership.
You know, like the headmasteror the principal would change
(30:04):
and then it was no longer a goodschool.
Because I'm like, well, youcan't control that, you know.
So, just being really consciousof that and honoring that and,
you know, feeling that too, like, okay, this school served my
child for this long but it's nolonger working.
What are my options?
You know, and alwaysremembering you have a choice, I
think, too, is really important, because a lot of parents think
(30:25):
, oh well, it's just too hard.
It's like, yeah, but will it beworth it in the longterm to get
through that?
Speaker 2 (30:33):
And I couldn't agree more Like.
I will tell you a situationwhere my gut you know, there was
only two autism schoolsbasically here in Salt Lake City
at the time, and one was inindustrial area, downtown and
the other one is in a city aboutan hour and 15 minutes away.
(30:57):
So what?
Obviously we're going tounfortunately choose the closer
one which is also in like a notso great area.
My gut told me from the get gono, this is not good.
And but everyone was like, yes,this is an autism, this is
exactly for DJ.
This, oh, how exciting.
And you have to give it a try.
You have to.
You know, my husband, my mom,like the teachers, everybody I
(31:24):
knew from that moment I readthat email and that gut feeling
I had, I knew and I carried itthat whole time through the
whole summer and all the testing, all to find out, because DJ,
at the time he was speakingmultiple languages, he was
speaking Italian and he was inthird grade speaking Italian,
doing long division on thewhiteboard in like you know,
(31:47):
crazy fashion.
And this woman was like, okay,we're going to get him in this
like 10th grade classroom withand that's where his academics
were at the time was at a 10thgrade level.
Because this is a totallydifferent beast we're dealing
with here with a high high.
Because this is a totallydifferent beast we're dealing
with here with a high high,highly educated, academic kid
with a low behavioral you know,reciprocative yeah, social
(32:10):
behavior system.
And so we, we had it all.
It was going to be beautiful,it was going to figure it all
out.
Show up the first day of school.
They had just built a highschool as well, so they sent all
the staff at the school thatwe're ready to go to to this
high school.
Not one person knows us, theydon't know our name, they don't
know his academic schools.
(32:31):
They literally put him in athird grade classroom, third
grade academic, third grade,everything.
He was beside himself because,of course, nothing is the way he
was going.
He left the school so manytimes in the first two days and
finally it was like the thirdday that I was there.
Literally the universedisconnected my battery from my
(32:56):
truck so that I could sit thereand watch how many children
would leave this school withoutadults knowing Time, like child
after child running away fromthis school All autistic
children by the way, this is theonly autistic school in the
industrial neighborhood of ourcity and I just was like I can't
(33:18):
believe this is happening.
I can't, we can't do this.
I went straight back and toldmy husband we can't lose, this
is happening.
I can't, we can't do this.
You know, went straight backand told my husband, like we
can't lose him, Like this isn'twork.
And so at that point everybodywas like, oh my gosh, you, how
could you have known?
Speaker 3 (33:31):
and I was like, ah, so I did, intuition told me.
Speaker 2 (33:36):
Yeah, listen, that is the point.
Like everyone else that islistening, please don't go down
the road.
I had to go down.
You know, we spent our wholesummer at this place.
We wasted so much time that wecould have been doing other
things for nothing.
That good that came out of itreally.
(33:57):
You know, just now, I guess,information for everybody else
now I guess information foreverybody else?
Speaker 3 (34:05):
yeah, and I guess too , sarah.
It's just like you know.
This is the thing likeintuition is to be acted upon,
not to be put in the drawer, andit's all about really trusting
that.
And you, if you feelsomething's not right with your
child and everyone telling youno, keep looking for till
someone listens to you and saysyes.
You know, and even I've got afriend at the moment and she's
(34:28):
going through this nasty lawcase but at the same time she
has this genuine fear and shepaid she had to pay this money
for a very expensive solicitorto look over her case and she
said it was so worth it becausethat person, in the first five
minutes she was there, validatedall her concerns and she didn't
(34:49):
even have to express them, youknow, like all the things that
she needed to flag, and she saidit was worth the money purely
to be validated and to be heard,you know, and to be understood.
You know, because so often thatgoes unsaid.
You know, um, even I've hadclients come in from like a
intuitive healing point of viewand they're like, oh, this is
(35:10):
going on.
I'm like, oh, yeah, I can feelthat.
And they're like, really,because my doctor's saying
there's no reason for it andblah, blah, blah, and I'm like,
oh no, that's definitely goingon for you.
I said let's see why and thenwe'll unpack that, you know, and
do some healing work and energywork on that and shift it.
And they're like, oh, my gosh,and sometimes just the mirror,
like someone else acknowledgingit, can be enough to shift it in
(35:32):
itself too, because you knowit's not.
You suddenly don't feel likeyou're crazy anymore.
So you haven't got this chargedenergy around it making you
feel like you're crazy, yeah.
Speaker 2 (35:42):
And you know what?
It's interesting?
My brain just told me thatthose people literally couldn't
give you the reflection backbecause they didn't have the
ability to do so, so you weren'tgoing to, you weren't going to
get it from them anyways.
That's yeah, that's so, that'sso incredible, and and it's now,
now that I maybe it will beeasier for me when I come into
(36:03):
those people, to not worry aboutpushing forward and just hi,
yeah, you're not for me, quicklyand easily, yes, exactly.
Speaker 3 (36:13):
Yeah, and it's even outgrowing people too.
So even therapists that youthink or felt were like the
right fit, sometimes you change,they change, you all change,
and it's about being reallywilling to be open to changing
from that and going okay, thesepeople don't serve me anymore.
I'm gonna shift and be okaywith that, you know.
(36:34):
And and if they're the rightprofessional or the right
support for you, they let yougrow, they let you go, and you
know, and that that's who youwant in your life.
You want people that know thatyou can go back there if you
really need to.
But in the end, if your gutsaying, without growing this
place or we're not meant to bedoing this anymore, and your
(36:54):
heart saying no, no, no, youneed to listen, because the more
you listen to that, the moreyou're going to be in tune with
that and and then it will allowyou to be more in tune with your
life too.
Speaker 2 (37:04):
A hundred percent.
That is so true.
Now, are you doing practicejust there in Australia, or are
you doing it globally, um online, where everyone can reach you?
Speaker 3 (37:15):
No, I work online mostly.
So, um, I have a handful ofclients that will come in, but
most of what I do isenergetically online and because
the universe has thesebeautiful things where you can
still connect with peopleenergetically because it's all
energy yeah, so I work withpeople all over the world and
it's really amazing.
(37:35):
Actually, my first clients werein America, which was the whole
funny irony of everything.
Speaker 4 (37:40):
Oh, I love that.
Speaker 3 (37:43):
Yeah, and I'm very familiar about.
I'm not good at it, but I knowabout juggling time zones and
I'm very grateful.
Websites yeah, exactly Exactly.
Speaker 2 (37:56):
So nice.
Um, I put it up on the screenfor those of you who can't see,
though willowhealingorg.
Willowhealingorg that's whereyou can go and, um, check out
the.
I guess just check out thewebsite and see what types of of
services or resources thatmight be able to fit you, or if
(38:18):
there's someone in your familyor close to you that you think
would resonate with thatinformation, please pass that on
.
That is the most important partof this journey is sharing the
information, which is why we'rehere.
Essentially right, it's becausewe want to share this with all
of the right people and all ofthe right families.
(38:39):
It's been so great to get toknow you.
I hope we can stay in touch.
I just love your energy and Ithink that it was.
It was just such a specialepisode today and I really
appreciate you coming.
Speaker 3 (38:54):
Thank, you, sarah, and thank you for having me.
And I just want to put thecaveat to that.
If you're like, oh, what can Ihave for healing?
I work with kids too, andsometimes kids are the most
amazing things and they don'tand especially because of my
background, the children don'thave to stay in the picture.
I can just they can come in andthen they can go be themselves.
(39:16):
Because I find sometimes as aparent, we think, oh, how could
we possibly do that?
But once we tapped in and wekind of get that sole permission
, they can go, do whatever theywant, and I've had clients do
that.
They'll peer on the screen fora second and then they'll go and
I'm like, okay, perfect, we'redone.
Yeah, and if people want to getto know me more, you can find
(39:37):
me on Instagram as well withWillow Healy and then SH at the
end me on Instagram as well withWillow.
Speaker 2 (39:44):
Healy and then SH at the end, and you'll just see my
beautiful face every day.
I love that.
I'll be sure to make sure tofollow for sure and put all the
links in the description of theepisode which will be coming out
in the next three weeks,possibly pretty soon.
So, yeah, if you are inAustralia, keep warm and if
(40:05):
you're here in the U S, staycool, cause it is ridiculous
right now.
And yeah, oh, it was just sonice to catch up with you and
and I hope that, um, we can, youknow, stay in touch and I'd
love to see how we can worktogether in the future for some
of the events that I hold andstuff, because I love including
(40:27):
my global advocate friends inthose events as much as possible
.
Speaker 3 (40:31):
I would love that, sarah, and thank you so much for
having me.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
Yes, thanks for being here.
Speaker 4 (40:36):
We'll definitely be in touch shining bright, oh yeah
(41:00):
, stories of love and courageall throughout the night, her
voice resonating an anthem forall.
Through the trials and trials,she answers the call.
Her mother and her fighter,breaking barriers and stride.
Her love is her guide, she'llnever hide.
She's changing the world foryou With her heart and speech
(41:24):
and strong Empathies and melody.
In her journey we all belong.
Followers gather like stars inthe night.
So bright 44,000 voices sharingin the light.
She stands for family advocatesfor more.
(41:45):
44,000 voices sharing in thelight.
She stands for family advocatesfor more.
Movement of compassion.
Ways of the soul Podcast.
Together, symphony of supportCreating life changing report.
She's changing the world foryou With a heart that's fierce
and strong.
Hypothese a melody Thank you,and love you dearly need.
(42:20):
She's changing the world foryou With a heart that's fierce
and strong, empathies andmelodies, and a journey we all
(42:43):
belong.
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