March 26, 2024 • 22 mins
How to be in control of your eating choices, without guilt, shame, or feeling like you're “breaking the rules.” In this episode of the Wellness Connection Podcast, nutritionist Fiona Kane breaks down the real reasons we feel out of control with food, especially around holidays like Easter—and how your inner child may be running the show without you even realizing it.
If you’re an adult who’s tired of yo-yo dieting, emotional eating, or constantly asking “Am I allowed to eat this?”, this conversation is for you. Learn how to shift your mindset, make conscious choices, and finally feel empowered about the way you eat.
Learn more about booking a nutrition consultation with Fiona: https://informedhealth.com.au/
Learn more about Fiona's speaking and media services: https://fionakane.com.au/
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The Beat of Nature
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Fiona Kane (00:01):
Hello and welcome to the Wellness Connection Podcast
with Fiona Kane.
I'm your host, Fiona Kane.
We have Easter coming up at themoment and I wanted to talk to
you a little bit about some ofthe language we use around food
that can really affect us inregards to things like choices
around Easter, but just ingeneral.
So one of the things that Ioften see I'm a nutritionist, of
(00:26):
course, so as a nutritionist,sometimes clients will say to me
well, what can I eat?
Or the other thing I see isthat if maybe a client of mine
is at a barbecue or at arestaurant with friends and they
know that that person's comingto see me, they will say to them
something like what are youallowed to eat?
(00:48):
And I think it's just reallyimportant to talk about this
language because I think a lotof what causes us issues around
food is language.
So I work with adults and, as anadult, what are you allowed to
eat?
Well, you're allowed to eatwhatever you like.
(01:11):
The restriction is about whatyou've got access to, what you
can afford, that kind of thing,of course, and if you have
religious restrictions that youchoose to abide by, all of that
right.
That's obviously.
That's not what this is aboutby all of that.
Right, that's obviously that'snot what this is about, but what
I'm talking about is that youhave choice and you have agency,
and so you can eat whatever youlike.
(01:32):
As an adult, though, you justlearn how to understand what the
consequences are, and then youlearn whether or not that's
something that you want to have,or how often you want to have
it that kind of thing not,that's something that you want
to have, or how often you wantto have it, that kind of thing.
So, as adults, we have it's.
So there's two different kindsof main kinds of freedom, right?
So a lot of us think of freedomas freedom from, so freedom I
(01:56):
don't have to do what the personsays that you know so, and
often, with our dietaryprotocols, we've got a lot of
stuff about whether it's ourchildhood, or it could be
boarding school, or some placethat we went to, or the time
that we went through where wedidn't have much money, or
whatever.
We've got these sort of timeswhere we were restricted in our
food in some way.
(02:17):
It could be all the diets thatwe've been on.
It could be, like I said, afinancial time where you
couldn't afford it.
Maybe it could be a parent or aspouse or someone who
restricted your eating.
And so a lot of us have a realkind of you know, don't tell me
what to do kind of attitudearound food, and it comes from
those things.
And so when we think about food, we think about it from a point
(02:40):
of view of don't tell me whatto do, sort of thing.
And so what happens is when youdo bring up things like you
know, what can I eat, or am Iallowed to eat such and such, or
you have to eat, or you should,or whatever, what often comes
up for people is that the childpart of them, the rebellious
child part of them, therebellious child part of them
(03:02):
that says you know, don't tellme what to do.
And so if you find that yousabotage yourself a lot in
regards to your diet, you'llprobably find that that child in
you is coming up quite a bit.
I think it especially comes upin us because we've got all
different parts of ourself andthe child is part of that.
I think it especially comes upif that child hasn't been
(03:25):
listened to or maybe isn't beinglistened to.
So, for example, if you justhave no joy in your life.
If you're not doing anythingthat's just fun or for pleasure,
then that child in you willshow itself and often will be
around food choices.
It will want you to buy thechocolate bars or the candy or
(03:50):
the cake or whatever the thingis that your child would really
love to have.
So be really, really aware thatwhen we talk about can I eat
that, can you eat that, shouldyou eat that, whatever?
The question should be morearound do I want to eat that,
can you eat that?
Should you eat that, whatever?
The question should be morearound do I want to eat that,
and does it nourish me?
(04:10):
Does it not?
Do I care?
Because you may or may not careabout that.
Again, it's totally up to you.
You're a grown up, you makeyour decisions.
But what I was talking aboutfreedom before, and I was
talking about freedom from well,we also have freedom to.
So the freedom to is sometimeswhere people get a bit unstuck,
(04:32):
because you see it maybe insometimes in people who retire
or the situation changes itcould even be that people have
always had kids and now they'reempty nesters, right, and they
can be quite lost when they havefreedom too, because they
haven't had freedom, too, for along time not that much freedom,
but freedom, too, is actuallywhat you have a choice to do.
(04:54):
So we all have 24 hours in aday, but you have a choice about
whether or not you choose toexercise, or whether or not you
get a job, or whether or not youeat well, or whether or not you
make sure you get enough sleepand, again, I know that there's
(05:15):
restrictions in different thingsfor various reasons, whether it
be where you live, jobs and allthat sort of stuff but I'm just
talking generally.
There's always exceptions, Iknow, but generally we have
choices around a lot of thosethings, and so we have freedom
to.
So freedom to is actually a lotof responsibility, though.
(05:36):
So you've got freedom to lookafter yourself so that you stay
as well as possible, or you'vegot freedom to completely trash
your body right, so you havethat freedom.
So when you know that you've gotfreedom to, then it is about
what choices that you make forthat freedom, what choices you
make with that freedom, and sowhen someone says, or when you
(05:59):
whether you saying to yourself,or someone says to you, or some
Instagram video or some sort ofinfluencer is saying should you
eat that.
Can you eat that?
You shouldn't eat that.
What I would just come back tois do you want to eat that and
why do you want to eat that?
(06:19):
How does that fit with youroverall diet and lifestyle?
How does that help you achievewhatever you want in regards to
your health and well-being?
Does it make you feel healthyand well and give you energy?
Does it make you feel tired andbloated?
So, if it does make you feeltired and bloated, maybe you
(06:41):
still want to have it, but doyou want to have it right before
you have to work for the day,or when you've got an exam on or
something?
Maybe you don't right?
So it's just about makingchoices, just making conscious
choices.
So I would just remind you thatand this is where our, like I
(07:01):
said, the rebellious child comesup.
For a lot of us who have, youknow, anyone who can relate to
emotional or stress, eating isthe rebellious child comes up.
For a lot of us who have, youknow, anyone who can relate to
emotional or stress, eating isoften our rebellious child that
comes up and just a reminder tokind of know that that's what's
happening.
It's like, oh, I know what'shappening.
I can, I'm acting like a youknow, notice how you're acting
Like I'm acting like athree-year-old or a
(07:22):
five-year-old or 12-year-old.
Notice that.
Oh, okay, I'm acting like a12-year-old.
What I've done is I'vetriggered that inner child in
myself.
Okay, so let's take a step backabout the decision around the
food Can I eat it?
Do I want to eat it?
Will I eat it?
All of those things Make yourchoices.
But it's really aboutempowering yourself and you
(07:46):
being in charge and you are inthe driver's seat of what you
choose to eat.
So that's a responsibility.
That's your choice, yourfreedom to your freedom to
choose.
So just be aware of language, beaware of other people
triggering different responsesin you, because often a lot of
what we do is programmed fromchildhood, from the world we
(08:10):
live in, from whether it be themedia or just our social, what
we're exposed to.
A lot of what we do, a lot ofour responses to things in life,
they are actually these kind ofreal, automated responses, and
those automated responses willusually come from our personal
experiences, whatever they are,and so a lot of our responses
(08:36):
are not always relevant or theright response or within what's
the word?
I'm trying to think of, theword word finding issues, uh,
the right size of response, asin we can over.
We can kind of overdo itsometimes because we might be
(08:58):
responding to something thathappened when we were 12 and
we're 52 and we kind of overdoour reaction to something.
So a lot of what we do is justreact right, and we all do that.
We've all had whatever historythat's led us to this point and
we kind of have these sort ofautomated responses to things.
(09:19):
The more that you just start tonotice them, the more that you
start to notice yourself ifyou're behaving like a
12-year-old or a 5-year-old orwhatever it is.
The more awareness you haveover that, the more that you can
bring the adult into the roomand get the adult to make the
choices.
But also make sure you're doingsome things that are fun so
that child is enjoying life too,that inner child.
And yes, sometimes the choicewill be yes, I'm going to have
(09:40):
the chocolate and I'm reallygoing to have it just because I
want to, and it will be fun andI'm going to enjoy it, and
that's fine.
But if you find that that's achoice you're making every day,
all the time, you need an adultback in charge again there.
So you need to look at whatyou're reacting to, and
sometimes we realize we're justreacting to stuff.
Um, yeah, we are havingreactions that aren't related to
(10:01):
what's going on.
Sometimes that means you needto see a therapist, a counselor,
read a book, whatever.
Sometimes it just means thesemeans that you just need to have
an awareness around it.
And once you have an awarenessaround it, you can sort of just
start to see it happening.
Oh, I know what's happeninghere.
I've done that with myself overthe years where I've started to
.
I think like some of myreactions and responses I still
(10:25):
am quite sure I'm unaware of orI don't pay much attention to,
and others I'm very aware of andI have a real high awareness of
what's going on and I can sortof watch myself.
And because I'm able to do that, over time I have actually been
able to change some of those aswell.
So you can change them as youstart to have an awareness
around them.
(10:46):
But essentially, in regards tonutrition, you have choice and
what we choose to put in ourmouth is our choice.
So to me it comes down tomaking conscious choices.
Now, if the can I have that,should I have that?
Whatever.
I'm not anti-people asking fornutrition advice.
Of course I'm a nutritionistand sometimes you just don't
(11:09):
know what you don't know.
So you're not aware of thehealth level of something, or
does that thing contain gluten?
Or there's other reasons whyyou're asking that question, and
of course it's appropriate toask questions.
But at the end of the day, justremember you are responsible
for you and get the advice fromwherever you get your advice
(11:29):
from, or from all differentplaces, whatever it is for you,
and then make your choices andjust understand that choices
have consequences and own it.
Just own it.
Own your choices, own yourconsequences.
But if you are in the driver'sseat and if you understand when
it's a child calming out and youhear those kinds of issues, you
understand when maybe you'reoverreacting I think that's the
(11:51):
word I was looking for beforelike overreacting.
If you're overreacting orinappropriately reacting or, you
know, if you're kind of justdoing something just because
nobody tells me what to do, andso you're actually sabotaging
yourself because you feel likesomehow you're fighting back
against some invisible forcethat maybe was in your past but
no longer present.
So just notice why you do whatyou do in regards to food,
(12:15):
notice the language you use,notice how you might respond to
different language of otherpeople and even just things of
different styles of how peopleeat.
I'm often talking to my clientsaround if they have a partner,
or it might be a mother-in-lawor it might be a mother or
whoever it is.
Different cultures havedifferent ways of being with
(12:37):
food and sharing food, andthere's a lot of cultures where
they get really offended whenyou don't eat what they put in
front of you or you don't eatall of what they put in front of
you.
So sometimes you also need tojust work out ways of discussing
those issues with the peoplearound you so that you can
acknowledge their kindness andacknowledge that you might want
(12:57):
to try the things sometimes ordo the things sometimes, but you
are also allowed to choose, sothese things can be tricky.
Now, in regards to Easter, it'sthe same advice really I give
around, whether it's Easter orChristmas or whatever it is, but
essentially I would just saymake choices about what you want
(13:18):
to eat, the things that makeyou happy, and eat some of those
things, but in between that,look after yourself like you
always do, so don't get caughtup on.
I shouldn't eat chocolate orhot cross buns or whatever it is
around Easter that really makesit special for you.
Just make really consciouschoices.
So and it depends on your levelof health and how much you know
(13:42):
some people can't do too muchbefore they end up with problems
, whether they've got sort ofdiabetes or they're struggling
with their weight or they'restruggling with other health
issues.
So some people maybe need to bea little bit more restricted,
whereas other people can relaxfor a couple of days and then
sort of just get back onto itafter the weekend.
It's up to you, depending onwhat's going on with your health
, but I would just suggest thatyou don't sort of have, you know
(14:06):
, six Easter bunnies and 10 hotcross buns and drink a lot of
alcohol and laze around thehouse and do nothing probably
not a good way to spend theweekend and you're really going
to regret it after the longweekend.
So I would just say makechoices.
So say I want to have hot crossbuns and this is how many I'm
(14:27):
going to buy.
This is how many I'm going toeat.
Maybe space it out over theweekend, eat them, enjoy them.
I hate how it corresponds, sothat's not a problem for me.
I'm never going to eat thoseraisins and stuff in bread.
That's revolting.
Anyway, my family all love themand so I know people love them.
And so just plan it the samewith Easter eggs.
(14:47):
I don't really like Easter eggsbecause I think that they often
use the worst quality chocolateand they're really awful.
So I actually would prefer justa chocolate block of chocolate
as opposed to an Easter egg mostof the time.
But again, choose something,ask for the thing that you like,
get the thing that you like,have it, enjoy it and really
(15:07):
just really enjoy it and reallytake pleasure in whatever it is.
But then just move on.
But don't you know what peopledo that you know we've all been
guilty of this.
What we do is we go to thesales and we kind of buy all the
Easter eggs and the Easter bunsand all that kind of stuff.
And I know people have beentalking to me about this for
weeks is that people havealready been eating hot cross
(15:30):
buns for weeks and weeks andthey've started eating all the
Easter eggs that they bought forthe family.
So now they've got to go backand buy the Easter eggs for the
family.
Just be aware that that canreally sabotage your health if
you're doing things that way.
So I would recommend you haveone shopping trip where you go
and get the things that you likeand that you want and you get
rid of all the gift things asfast as possible and you really
(15:53):
really enjoy yourself overEaster and eat the things that
make you happy, really, reallyenjoy it, but also eat things
that help you feel well andbalanced.
You know your protein, yourveggies and go for your walks or
go to the gym still, or youknow and just really enjoy that
time with your friends andfamily and celebrate without
(16:15):
feeling guilty.
You should not have to feelguilty about whatever choices
you make around your food.
It's just about having aresponsibility around it, making
conscious choices and choosingsometimes to just eat for
pleasure that's okay and to nothate on yourself for whatever
(16:37):
choices you do or don't make.
But yes, you can eat.
That it's just totally up toyou and it's totally up to how
that's going to affect you,because we're all a little bit
different with what affects usand, as I've talked about before
(16:57):
as well, when I talk about foodin regards to sort of, will
this nourish me or how do I feelwhen I eat it?
Sometimes, when you eat a foodand you don't feel well, there's
a really good indication not toeat that food.
It could come out in spots orthings like that.
Sometimes it means thatsomething else is going on.
So sometimes there's somethingbehind it.
So it's good to investigatewhat that is, maybe before you
just completely rule out a food.
(17:17):
So sometimes the food gives youthe indication that the food is
not your friend.
Sometimes the food gives youthe indication that there's
something else going on in yourbody where maybe you're not
making certain digestive enzymesor there's just something else
that's not going well.
Your body's quite inflamed atthe moment.
There's something else going on, then that is the reason why
(17:37):
you don't feel well eating thefood.
So just be aware of not kind ofcompletely just stopping all
foods because you didn't feelwell after eating them once
maybe, unless it's really clearand really obvious it was that
food.
At the same time, the amount ofpeople I know who eat foods that
make them really, really sickall of the time and they have
(17:59):
this food and they know thatthey're going to be in pain for
the next three days and I just Idon't understand that.
I understand making like.
I make little choices like that, where it sort of affects me a
little bit.
But the actual people who arein incredible pain for three
days after they eat, wow, youreally want to enjoy the thing
and if you're having it becauseyou really, really want it and
it really makes you happy, wellthen at least there's that.
(18:22):
But sometimes these people aredoing it because they feel bad
about saying no to people.
And, yeah, honestly, look, we'readults and we get to choose to
a certain extent again, like Isaid, within our funds and our
availability, whatever but weget to choose what we put in our
mouth and what we eat and weget to choose what we don't.
And we also get theconsequences of it.
(18:45):
If we keep the adult in theroom most of the time, the adult
is driving the car and just beaware of that child in us that
that's reactive and either justwants to get attention because
they're not there's not much fungoing on in our life, or
they're reacting to certainlanguage or certain situations.
You might find it always incertain situations.
(19:06):
That's when that child comes up.
Just have a, just notice thatthat's happening and once you
have an awareness around it,okay.
It always happens when I goshopping and I'm hungry.
Not a good idea to go shoppingwhen you're hungry, it's really
not, because the junk food'sjust there everywhere for your
opportunity always happens whenI go to mother-in-law's house,
to my sister's house, towhatever, whatever, whatever, it
(19:26):
is all right.
Main thing, though, is don'tfeel shame about whatever
choices you do and don't makewith your food.
Uh, you are not a good or badperson because of what you did
or didn't eat.
Just have food eating, eatingfood affects our bodies and
sometimes has good consequences,sometimes has negative
consequences, that is all.
(19:47):
It's not a moral thing or agood or bad thing.
It simply is what works for you.
But there's no shame and youshouldn't feel no shame for your
choices.
And if we make poor choices andif we learn that the choices
that we're making aren't greatfor us, well, when you know
better, you do better, as MayaAngelou teaches.
(20:10):
So we just learn and we try anddo better.
Anyway, I hope that helps youjust kind of understand a little
bit of languaging around.
You get to choose and you getto make choices, and you get to
be the grown up and, as opposedto, can I, should I, that kind
of and the sort of language thatmight bring up that child in
(20:32):
you who wants to rebel againstdoing the so-called in inverted
commas right thing.
Anyway, I hope you have a lovelyEaster.
Just choose what you want tohave.
Enjoy it Overall.
Look after yourself and don'tfeel guilt about whatever you
did or didn't do, but also don'tlet Easter go on for the next
six weeks with.
You know you buy so many thingsin the sales that you know
(20:53):
pretty much Easter goes for twomonths every year.
Not a good idea.
Not a good idea for your health.
Anyway, hope you have awonderful Easter and I will talk
to you next time.
Don't forget to like andsubscribe.
I've got on either side here.
I've got one's a subscribebutton and one's the next video
(21:13):
that you can watch, so pleasejust go on to the next video and
don't forget to like, subscribeand share.
I'm also on Rumble and YouTubefor those who don't know, so if
you want to watch this video andyou can also do comments on
Rumble and YouTube.
Otherwise, I hope you have awonderful Easter and I will talk
to you all again soon.
Thank you so much.
Okay, bye.
Hello and welcome to the Wellness Connection Podcast
with Fiona Kane.
I'm your host, Fiona Kane.
We have Easter coming up at themoment and I wanted to talk to
you a little bit about some ofthe language we use around food
that can really affect us inregards to things like choices
around Easter, but just ingeneral.
So one of the things that Ioften see I'm a nutritionist, of
(00:26):
course, so as a nutritionist,sometimes clients will say to me
well, what can I eat?
Or the other thing I see isthat if maybe a client of mine
is at a barbecue or at arestaurant with friends and they
know that that person's comingto see me, they will say to them
something like what are youallowed to eat?
(00:48):
And I think it's just reallyimportant to talk about this
language because I think a lotof what causes us issues around
food is language.
So I work with adults and, as anadult, what are you allowed to
eat?
Well, you're allowed to eatwhatever you like.
(01:11):
The restriction is about whatyou've got access to, what you
can afford, that kind of thing,of course, and if you have
religious restrictions that youchoose to abide by, all of that
right.
That's obviously.
That's not what this is aboutby all of that.
Right, that's obviously that'snot what this is about, but what
I'm talking about is that youhave choice and you have agency,
and so you can eat whatever youlike.
(01:32):
As an adult, though, you justlearn how to understand what the
consequences are, and then youlearn whether or not that's
something that you want to have,or how often you want to have
it that kind of thing not,that's something that you want
to have, or how often you wantto have it, that kind of thing.
So, as adults, we have it's.
So there's two different kindsof main kinds of freedom, right?
So a lot of us think of freedomas freedom from, so freedom I
(01:56):
don't have to do what the personsays that you know so, and
often, with our dietaryprotocols, we've got a lot of
stuff about whether it's ourchildhood, or it could be
boarding school, or some placethat we went to, or the time
that we went through where wedidn't have much money, or
whatever.
We've got these sort of timeswhere we were restricted in our
food in some way.
(02:17):
It could be all the diets thatwe've been on.
It could be, like I said, afinancial time where you
couldn't afford it.
Maybe it could be a parent or aspouse or someone who
restricted your eating.
And so a lot of us have a realkind of you know, don't tell me
what to do kind of attitudearound food, and it comes from
those things.
And so when we think about food, we think about it from a point
(02:40):
of view of don't tell me whatto do, sort of thing.
And so what happens is when youdo bring up things like you
know, what can I eat, or am Iallowed to eat such and such, or
you have to eat, or you should,or whatever, what often comes
up for people is that the childpart of them, the rebellious
child part of them, therebellious child part of them
(03:02):
that says you know, don't tellme what to do.
And so if you find that yousabotage yourself a lot in
regards to your diet, you'llprobably find that that child in
you is coming up quite a bit.
I think it especially comes upin us because we've got all
different parts of ourself andthe child is part of that.
I think it especially comes upif that child hasn't been
(03:25):
listened to or maybe isn't beinglistened to.
So, for example, if you justhave no joy in your life.
If you're not doing anythingthat's just fun or for pleasure,
then that child in you willshow itself and often will be
around food choices.
It will want you to buy thechocolate bars or the candy or
(03:50):
the cake or whatever the thingis that your child would really
love to have.
So be really, really aware thatwhen we talk about can I eat
that, can you eat that, shouldyou eat that, whatever?
The question should be morearound do I want to eat that,
can you eat that?
Should you eat that, whatever?
The question should be morearound do I want to eat that,
and does it nourish me?
(04:10):
Does it not?
Do I care?
Because you may or may not careabout that.
Again, it's totally up to you.
You're a grown up, you makeyour decisions.
But what I was talking aboutfreedom before, and I was
talking about freedom from well,we also have freedom to.
So the freedom to is sometimeswhere people get a bit unstuck,
(04:32):
because you see it maybe insometimes in people who retire
or the situation changes itcould even be that people have
always had kids and now they'reempty nesters, right, and they
can be quite lost when they havefreedom too, because they
haven't had freedom, too, for along time not that much freedom,
but freedom, too, is actuallywhat you have a choice to do.
(04:54):
So we all have 24 hours in aday, but you have a choice about
whether or not you choose toexercise, or whether or not you
get a job, or whether or not youeat well, or whether or not you
make sure you get enough sleepand, again, I know that there's
(05:15):
restrictions in different thingsfor various reasons, whether it
be where you live, jobs and allthat sort of stuff but I'm just
talking generally.
There's always exceptions, Iknow, but generally we have
choices around a lot of thosethings, and so we have freedom
to.
So freedom to is actually a lotof responsibility, though.
(05:36):
So you've got freedom to lookafter yourself so that you stay
as well as possible, or you'vegot freedom to completely trash
your body right, so you havethat freedom.
So when you know that you've gotfreedom to, then it is about
what choices that you make forthat freedom, what choices you
make with that freedom, and sowhen someone says, or when you
(05:59):
whether you saying to yourself,or someone says to you, or some
Instagram video or some sort ofinfluencer is saying should you
eat that.
Can you eat that?
You shouldn't eat that.
What I would just come back tois do you want to eat that and
why do you want to eat that?
(06:19):
How does that fit with youroverall diet and lifestyle?
How does that help you achievewhatever you want in regards to
your health and well-being?
Does it make you feel healthyand well and give you energy?
Does it make you feel tired andbloated?
So, if it does make you feeltired and bloated, maybe you
(06:41):
still want to have it, but doyou want to have it right before
you have to work for the day,or when you've got an exam on or
something?
Maybe you don't right?
So it's just about makingchoices, just making conscious
choices.
So I would just remind you thatand this is where our, like I
(07:01):
said, the rebellious child comesup.
For a lot of us who have, youknow, anyone who can relate to
emotional or stress, eating isthe rebellious child comes up.
For a lot of us who have, youknow, anyone who can relate to
emotional or stress, eating isoften our rebellious child that
comes up and just a reminder tokind of know that that's what's
happening.
It's like, oh, I know what'shappening.
I can, I'm acting like a youknow, notice how you're acting
Like I'm acting like athree-year-old or a
(07:22):
five-year-old or 12-year-old.
Notice that.
Oh, okay, I'm acting like a12-year-old.
What I've done is I'vetriggered that inner child in
myself.
Okay, so let's take a step backabout the decision around the
food Can I eat it?
Do I want to eat it?
Will I eat it?
All of those things Make yourchoices.
But it's really aboutempowering yourself and you
(07:46):
being in charge and you are inthe driver's seat of what you
choose to eat.
So that's a responsibility.
That's your choice, yourfreedom to your freedom to
choose.
So just be aware of language, beaware of other people
triggering different responsesin you, because often a lot of
what we do is programmed fromchildhood, from the world we
(08:10):
live in, from whether it be themedia or just our social, what
we're exposed to.
A lot of what we do, a lot ofour responses to things in life,
they are actually these kind ofreal, automated responses, and
those automated responses willusually come from our personal
experiences, whatever they are,and so a lot of our responses
(08:36):
are not always relevant or theright response or within what's
the word?
I'm trying to think of, theword word finding issues, uh,
the right size of response, asin we can over.
We can kind of overdo itsometimes because we might be
(08:58):
responding to something thathappened when we were 12 and
we're 52 and we kind of overdoour reaction to something.
So a lot of what we do is justreact right, and we all do that.
We've all had whatever historythat's led us to this point and
we kind of have these sort ofautomated responses to things.
(09:19):
The more that you just start tonotice them, the more that you
start to notice yourself ifyou're behaving like a
12-year-old or a 5-year-old orwhatever it is.
The more awareness you haveover that, the more that you can
bring the adult into the roomand get the adult to make the
choices.
But also make sure you're doingsome things that are fun so
that child is enjoying life too,that inner child.
And yes, sometimes the choicewill be yes, I'm going to have
(09:40):
the chocolate and I'm reallygoing to have it just because I
want to, and it will be fun andI'm going to enjoy it, and
that's fine.
But if you find that that's achoice you're making every day,
all the time, you need an adultback in charge again there.
So you need to look at whatyou're reacting to, and
sometimes we realize we're justreacting to stuff.
Um, yeah, we are havingreactions that aren't related to
(10:01):
what's going on.
Sometimes that means you needto see a therapist, a counselor,
read a book, whatever.
Sometimes it just means thesemeans that you just need to have
an awareness around it.
And once you have an awarenessaround it, you can sort of just
start to see it happening.
Oh, I know what's happeninghere.
I've done that with myself overthe years where I've started to
.
I think like some of myreactions and responses I still
(10:25):
am quite sure I'm unaware of orI don't pay much attention to,
and others I'm very aware of andI have a real high awareness of
what's going on and I can sortof watch myself.
And because I'm able to do that, over time I have actually been
able to change some of those aswell.
So you can change them as youstart to have an awareness
around them.
(10:46):
But essentially, in regards tonutrition, you have choice and
what we choose to put in ourmouth is our choice.
So to me it comes down tomaking conscious choices.
Now, if the can I have that,should I have that?
Whatever.
I'm not anti-people asking fornutrition advice.
Of course I'm a nutritionistand sometimes you just don't
(11:09):
know what you don't know.
So you're not aware of thehealth level of something, or
does that thing contain gluten?
Or there's other reasons whyyou're asking that question, and
of course it's appropriate toask questions.
But at the end of the day, justremember you are responsible
for you and get the advice fromwherever you get your advice
(11:29):
from, or from all differentplaces, whatever it is for you,
and then make your choices andjust understand that choices
have consequences and own it.
Just own it.
Own your choices, own yourconsequences.
But if you are in the driver'sseat and if you understand when
it's a child calming out and youhear those kinds of issues, you
understand when maybe you'reoverreacting I think that's the
(11:51):
word I was looking for beforelike overreacting.
If you're overreacting orinappropriately reacting or, you
know, if you're kind of justdoing something just because
nobody tells me what to do, andso you're actually sabotaging
yourself because you feel likesomehow you're fighting back
against some invisible forcethat maybe was in your past but
no longer present.
So just notice why you do whatyou do in regards to food,
(12:15):
notice the language you use,notice how you might respond to
different language of otherpeople and even just things of
different styles of how peopleeat.
I'm often talking to my clientsaround if they have a partner,
or it might be a mother-in-lawor it might be a mother or
whoever it is.
Different cultures havedifferent ways of being with
(12:37):
food and sharing food, andthere's a lot of cultures where
they get really offended whenyou don't eat what they put in
front of you or you don't eatall of what they put in front of
you.
So sometimes you also need tojust work out ways of discussing
those issues with the peoplearound you so that you can
acknowledge their kindness andacknowledge that you might want
(12:57):
to try the things sometimes ordo the things sometimes, but you
are also allowed to choose, sothese things can be tricky.
Now, in regards to Easter, it'sthe same advice really I give
around, whether it's Easter orChristmas or whatever it is, but
essentially I would just saymake choices about what you want
(13:18):
to eat, the things that makeyou happy, and eat some of those
things, but in between that,look after yourself like you
always do, so don't get caughtup on.
I shouldn't eat chocolate orhot cross buns or whatever it is
around Easter that really makesit special for you.
Just make really consciouschoices.
So and it depends on your levelof health and how much you know
(13:42):
some people can't do too muchbefore they end up with problems
, whether they've got sort ofdiabetes or they're struggling
with their weight or they'restruggling with other health
issues.
So some people maybe need to bea little bit more restricted,
whereas other people can relaxfor a couple of days and then
sort of just get back onto itafter the weekend.
It's up to you, depending onwhat's going on with your health
, but I would just suggest thatyou don't sort of have, you know
(14:06):
, six Easter bunnies and 10 hotcross buns and drink a lot of
alcohol and laze around thehouse and do nothing probably
not a good way to spend theweekend and you're really going
to regret it after the longweekend.
So I would just say makechoices.
So say I want to have hot crossbuns and this is how many I'm
(14:27):
going to buy.
This is how many I'm going toeat.
Maybe space it out over theweekend, eat them, enjoy them.
I hate how it corresponds, sothat's not a problem for me.
I'm never going to eat thoseraisins and stuff in bread.
That's revolting.
Anyway, my family all love themand so I know people love them.
And so just plan it the samewith Easter eggs.
(14:47):
I don't really like Easter eggsbecause I think that they often
use the worst quality chocolateand they're really awful.
So I actually would prefer justa chocolate block of chocolate
as opposed to an Easter egg mostof the time.
But again, choose something,ask for the thing that you like,
get the thing that you like,have it, enjoy it and really
(15:07):
just really enjoy it and reallytake pleasure in whatever it is.
But then just move on.
But don't you know what peopledo that you know we've all been
guilty of this.
What we do is we go to thesales and we kind of buy all the
Easter eggs and the Easter bunsand all that kind of stuff.
And I know people have beentalking to me about this for
weeks is that people havealready been eating hot cross
(15:30):
buns for weeks and weeks andthey've started eating all the
Easter eggs that they bought forthe family.
So now they've got to go backand buy the Easter eggs for the
family.
Just be aware that that canreally sabotage your health if
you're doing things that way.
So I would recommend you haveone shopping trip where you go
and get the things that you likeand that you want and you get
rid of all the gift things asfast as possible and you really
(15:53):
really enjoy yourself overEaster and eat the things that
make you happy, really, reallyenjoy it, but also eat things
that help you feel well andbalanced.
You know your protein, yourveggies and go for your walks or
go to the gym still, or youknow and just really enjoy that
time with your friends andfamily and celebrate without
(16:15):
feeling guilty.
You should not have to feelguilty about whatever choices
you make around your food.
It's just about having aresponsibility around it, making
conscious choices and choosingsometimes to just eat for
pleasure that's okay and to nothate on yourself for whatever
(16:37):
choices you do or don't make.
But yes, you can eat.
That it's just totally up toyou and it's totally up to how
that's going to affect you,because we're all a little bit
different with what affects usand, as I've talked about before
(16:57):
as well, when I talk about foodin regards to sort of, will
this nourish me or how do I feelwhen I eat it?
Sometimes, when you eat a foodand you don't feel well, there's
a really good indication not toeat that food.
It could come out in spots orthings like that.
Sometimes it means thatsomething else is going on.
So sometimes there's somethingbehind it.
So it's good to investigatewhat that is, maybe before you
just completely rule out a food.
(17:17):
So sometimes the food gives youthe indication that the food is
not your friend.
Sometimes the food gives youthe indication that there's
something else going on in yourbody where maybe you're not
making certain digestive enzymesor there's just something else
that's not going well.
Your body's quite inflamed atthe moment.
There's something else going on, then that is the reason why
(17:37):
you don't feel well eating thefood.
So just be aware of not kind ofcompletely just stopping all
foods because you didn't feelwell after eating them once
maybe, unless it's really clearand really obvious it was that
food.
At the same time, the amount ofpeople I know who eat foods that
make them really, really sickall of the time and they have
(17:59):
this food and they know thatthey're going to be in pain for
the next three days and I just Idon't understand that.
I understand making like.
I make little choices like that, where it sort of affects me a
little bit.
But the actual people who arein incredible pain for three
days after they eat, wow, youreally want to enjoy the thing
and if you're having it becauseyou really, really want it and
it really makes you happy, wellthen at least there's that.
(18:22):
But sometimes these people aredoing it because they feel bad
about saying no to people.
And, yeah, honestly, look, we'readults and we get to choose to
a certain extent again, like Isaid, within our funds and our
availability, whatever but weget to choose what we put in our
mouth and what we eat and weget to choose what we don't.
And we also get theconsequences of it.
(18:45):
If we keep the adult in theroom most of the time, the adult
is driving the car and just beaware of that child in us that
that's reactive and either justwants to get attention because
they're not there's not much fungoing on in our life, or
they're reacting to certainlanguage or certain situations.
You might find it always incertain situations.
(19:06):
That's when that child comes up.
Just have a, just notice thatthat's happening and once you
have an awareness around it,okay.
It always happens when I goshopping and I'm hungry.
Not a good idea to go shoppingwhen you're hungry, it's really
not, because the junk food'sjust there everywhere for your
opportunity always happens whenI go to mother-in-law's house,
to my sister's house, towhatever, whatever, whatever, it
(19:26):
is all right.
Main thing, though, is don'tfeel shame about whatever
choices you do and don't makewith your food.
Uh, you are not a good or badperson because of what you did
or didn't eat.
Just have food eating, eatingfood affects our bodies and
sometimes has good consequences,sometimes has negative
consequences, that is all.
(19:47):
It's not a moral thing or agood or bad thing.
It simply is what works for you.
But there's no shame and youshouldn't feel no shame for your
choices.
And if we make poor choices andif we learn that the choices
that we're making aren't greatfor us, well, when you know
better, you do better, as MayaAngelou teaches.
(20:10):
So we just learn and we try anddo better.
Anyway, I hope that helps youjust kind of understand a little
bit of languaging around.
You get to choose and you getto make choices, and you get to
be the grown up and, as opposedto, can I, should I, that kind
of and the sort of language thatmight bring up that child in
(20:32):
you who wants to rebel againstdoing the so-called in inverted
commas right thing.
Anyway, I hope you have a lovelyEaster.
Just choose what you want tohave.
Enjoy it Overall.
Look after yourself and don'tfeel guilt about whatever you
did or didn't do, but also don'tlet Easter go on for the next
six weeks with.
You know you buy so many thingsin the sales that you know
(20:53):
pretty much Easter goes for twomonths every year.
Not a good idea.
Not a good idea for your health.
Anyway, hope you have awonderful Easter and I will talk
to you next time.
Don't forget to like andsubscribe.
I've got on either side here.
I've got one's a subscribebutton and one's the next video
(21:13):
that you can watch, so pleasejust go on to the next video and
don't forget to like, subscribeand share.
I'm also on Rumble and YouTubefor those who don't know, so if
you want to watch this video andyou can also do comments on
Rumble and YouTube.
Otherwise, I hope you have awonderful Easter and I will talk
to you all again soon.
Thank you so much.
Okay, bye.
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