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We're back after battling illness and navigating holidays, ready to dive into imaginative storytelling with renewed energy! This episode takes you on a journey from the stunning landscapes of Oman to the competitive rivalry of Italian car manufacturers – all through the power of three random words.

The adventure begins with a vivid recounting of a day trip to Oman, complete with winding roads, cultural encounters, and what might be the world's best KFC chicken burger. But the real excitement kicks off when we introduce a fresh twist on our format: choosing locations where we think the other would hide in an international game of hide-and-seek, then deriving three words from those places.

Dylan faces the challenge of crafting a story from "pizzeria," "lambs," and "florist" (inspired by Trump's Mar-a-Lago), responding with a masterful slam poetry performance connected to the Jump Street films that will have you laughing out loud. Meanwhile, James tackles "etchings," "slam," and "revisit" (derived from North Korea's Central Zoo) by creating an elaborate origin story for Ferrari and Lamborghini as competing business owners in 1940s Northern Italy.

The rivalry between "Fruccio" and "Enzo" escalates as they battle for the heart of a local florist named Celia, culminating in a soapbox derby featuring their animal mascots – a lamb and a miniature horse. Their contest is hilariously simulated through a computer game, determining once and for all who will win the fair maiden's heart.

Join us for this comedic journey through improvised storytelling, questionable accents, and the surprising origins of Italian automotive excellence. And stay tuned for next week when we explore where the strongest man in the world would come from – and why!

Thank's for listening, Tune in next week for another episode!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Three Word Story.
I'm James.

Speaker 2 (00:02):
I'm Dylan.

Speaker 1 (00:03):
And this is the podcast where we take three
words from the app.

Speaker 2 (00:06):
What three words.

Speaker 1 (00:07):
And improv the shit out of a story.

Speaker 2 (00:10):
Today on Three Word Story.

Speaker 1 (00:12):
Are you trying to tell me that the word is a lamb
or a group of lambs?
I'm dying.

Speaker 2 (00:19):
Not sure if you are aware of the plot of 21 and 22
Jump Street.

Speaker 1 (00:26):
DJ 2 and the big one in a stink.

Speaker 2 (00:28):
Farming.
Don't make me a donkey, ilya.
Please do not make me ticklemyself.

Speaker 1 (00:41):
Keep rolling, rolling , rolling, rolling, dylan.
Keep rolling, rolling, rolling,keep rolling, rolling, rolling,
rolling, dylan, moving my movedown.
Hands up a hands down.
Three word story.
What you gonna do now, dylan,how are you?

Speaker 2 (00:53):
double kill.
Hey, james, how's it going well?
Now I'm doing fantasticallywell.
Uh, we, uh.
It's been a minute.
It's been a minute, but it hasbeen a minute.

Speaker 1 (01:01):
Happy to be back I know we are back.
Uh, unfortunately there's beensickness.
There's been a minute, but ithas been a minute.
Happy to be back.
I know we are back.
Unfortunately there's beensickness, we're back.
There's been holidays, we'reback, and yeah, so there's been
things in the way, there's beenobstacles, but we've hurdled
them, and by hurdle them I meanwe've ran into them, fallen over
, been sick, been on holiday,yes, but we are here, dylan, we

(01:25):
for the podcast do kill.
What have you been up to since?
We've?

Speaker 2 (01:26):
been sick and on holiday.
I guess that's about it.
What have you done?
Well, besides being sick I wasnot on holiday and I was, yeah,
just being sick, trying to getback to my feet been to the gym
the other day, still have a bitof bit of phlegm, because I felt
the listeners needed to knowthat they're probably hearing,
because I felt the listenersneeded to know that They'll
probably hear it in the back ofyour throat.

Speaker 1 (01:44):
Now, what's different about Dylan?

Speaker 2 (01:45):
All of a sudden him just bonging Harf.

Speaker 1 (01:49):
No delicious.
Well, Dylan, it was way backwhen when we decided that we
were going to pick words basedon somewhere where the other one
would hide, and we're going todo our three words based on this
one.
But first of all, dylan, let megive you a little bit of update
of what I've been doing, andthis, for me, is an ode to Oman.

(02:10):
I just want a bit of an ode toOman.
So yesterday, me and Ali, wetook a trip to Oman.
And now for those at home andacross the world who just think
that I'm I'm messing around andjust it's like it's a weird
thing it's not it's a countryand it's a wonderful country.
The borders the united arabemirates in which we live, so we

(02:31):
decided to go there on a daytrip and it was an extended day,
dylan it was.
It was a long, long day.
So, bam, five hour drive therefrom half five.
Beautiful landscape, there'sdesert, there's rocks, there's
all kinds of nice things.
We crossed the border.
Every Omani person there wassmiley AF, just kind and nice
and welcoming to Oman.

(02:51):
You queue for a bit, you getsome car insurance, you get your
visa, bam stickers.
Smiley face man Straight on theroad again, okay, it was
delightful.

Speaker 2 (02:59):
No, no, it's here, there's.
It was a life of fun.
No, no, yeah, there's.
No, there's no gunshots.

Speaker 1 (03:04):
That was him just being like oh, and we were
straight out there, we're on theroad, we're on the road again
we drove for many, many hours,uh, taking in the sights,
schlurping them in, seeing thewhat uh old man has to offer,
and some beautiful landscapes.
It's a big old country, uh,about 5 million people.
Uh, they're not like Ferrarisand Lamborghinis like Dubai, but
that's not a real place really,when it comes to what normal

(03:24):
people are but everyone had likenice cars, Everyone was pretty.
I would say well off, but it's alittle bit more traditional.

Speaker 2 (03:31):
Traditional.

Speaker 1 (03:33):
So the first obstacle that we came across whilst we
were driving to our first stopin Alhambra is we got to a town.
Now it was Eid celebration.
So for our Muslim friends outthere, eid Mubarak, it's the end
of Ramadan, so Eid Mubarak.
So it was big celebrations forpeople in the area and the

(03:53):
traffic was chock-a-block.
It was two lanes completelyjust blocked out.
This was the main road, so wedecided to be typical tourists.

Speaker 2 (04:03):
And a new segment for typical tourists.
A new segment.

Speaker 1 (04:07):
So yeah, for typical tourists.
Then we went off piste so wewent to ways and went hey, ways,
give us a different route,because you know this, this,
this main road shenanigans ain'tdoing it for us.
So we then spent the next 45minutes to an hour driving
around teeny, tiny little townroads that were completely
chock-a-block full of peopleeverywhere.

(04:28):
So there was like a castle there, where we assume everyone was
going for their eid celebration.
So everyone was wearing theirtraditional candoras and they
had like these, these likecurved swords in their pockets,
like everyone looked amazing.
Okay, yeah, and these roadswere tiny.
Right, we're used to it.
Here roads are huge, but thiswas like everything was like.
It was like an italian village,like it was everything at

(04:51):
different heights there washills, it was close together and
people were parked everywhere,like just everywhere.
So people would park up a streetso much that it would block
access, so then everyone wouldhave to reverse the other way.
Then you try another street andthen there's too many people
coming and it was.
It was chaos, but everyone wasstill nice.
Someone came past.
They put the window down.

(05:11):
He was like brother, I wouldn'tgo down there if I were.
You maybe try down that way inthe left.
And I was like, thank you somuch.
He obviously knew he's likelook at that stupid white guy
here, what's he doing here?
The silly prick.
And instead of being angry atme for clogging up the road, he
was just generally nice.
So hats off to that man, hatsoff.
We made haste and we went tothis beautiful, beautiful,
beautiful oasis.

(05:32):
So it was like within a valleypalm trees everywhere.
It was like Bali, right.
The actual description on theapp that we used to find these
places said it will make youfeel like you're in bali.
And we sat and we found thiscafe where it was leaves and
palm trees over you and ali satthere and went this reminds me
of bali and I went.
My goodness, the person whocreated that app absolutely

(05:54):
nailed it on the head and it wasbeautiful up until the family
on the table next to us decidedthe bird song they were like
could you please leave ourliving room?

Speaker 2 (06:07):
this is not.
This is um part of the yourtypical tourist segment ali put
the gag back in the grandma'smouth.

Speaker 1 (06:13):
Right, we want to, we really want a traditional way,
but it was.
It was calm, peaceful.
This family and particularlythis was the older lady of the
group decided to do this,decided that, nay, we shall not
enjoy this solitude andpeacefulness.
We must listen to abbaimmediately.
And stuck on some dancing queenon her phone, playing it out

(06:37):
loud, and just sat back in achair looking at the scenery and
everyone had to listen tocrackly ass dancing queen, as me
and Ali are there seething,going why, why, lady, why, and
then walking away.
Going dancing queen, fuck'ssake.
So on her point.
So that was the only downside.
And then we went off from therefor another hour drive through

(07:00):
the mountains up and down, andthen we went to another.
It was a wadi, so it was it'slike drive, haven't rained, and
then you follow basically thisstream all the way up where
they've taken water from thevery top of the mountain all the
way through.
So it's like a narrow stream,probably like 12 inches wide,
and then you just walk along it,follow it all across the

(07:21):
mountain as the water's runningdown.
There's goats all around theplace I was not ready for you.

Speaker 2 (07:30):
I thought you were like goats along there.
Along it, double kill and therewas goats everywhere, double
kill.

Speaker 1 (07:37):
So I've for dylan, I've got goat burger for you.
No, there was no, no dead goats.
They were all alive and theywere all.
They were all very clean, theyhad nice hair, I'll give them
that.
And we went up and we enjoyedsome nature.
There was some nature, lizardsaround, there was some rocks,
there was some nice people.
It wasn't too busy, and then wemade haste all the way home and
the last kind of little goodbyefrom Oman.

(07:58):
We hadn't eaten much the day,we were just enjoying ourselves.
And, look, eat much of the day.
We were just enjoying ourselves.
And look, it was again muchmore traditional than what we're
used to lots of fast foodeverywhere and it was eat.
So most places like shawarmashop closed, you know, this
restaurant closed and we werehungry, right, yeah, the last
petroleum station before we leftand, by the way, petrol is
super cheap.

Speaker 2 (08:19):
Oh, I just wanted to say not edible I tried I tried
but.
I have.

Speaker 1 (08:24):
That's why I still want so much energy.
And the last shop that we saw,last petroleum station, kfc
kentucky motherfucking fingerlooking good fried chicken got
it.
And I'd say to you, dylan, Iate the best chicken burger I
have ever had in mymotherfucking life.
It was delicious.
I've had so much kf had in mymotherfucking life.

(08:45):
It was delicious.
I've had so much KFC in my life.

Speaker 2 (08:48):
That's a strong statement.
It's very strong.

Speaker 1 (08:50):
The KFC.
I've got some fucking shit totell you, the KFC next to me.
I'm not going to say where I amor where it is, because I don't
want to be thrown in prison,but it's shit, right, it's
finger licking fucking shit,it's what it is.
It it's finger licking fuckingshit, it's what it is.
It's bad, and it's bad for KFC.
And if KFC wants to get intouch, I will point them in the
right direction and say thatthey are letting you down,
colonel, they are letting youdown, but this Omani KFC, my god

(09:14):
, it was juicy, it was saucy, itwas everything you needed to be
, besides just comparing it toother KFCs.

Speaker 2 (09:23):
Besides just comparing it to other kfc's,
like you are now saying it's thebest chicken burger like period
, not just best chicken burgerfrom kfc, or is it like ever?

Speaker 1 (09:34):
I'm telling you I speak english.

Speaker 2 (09:37):
This is the best.

Speaker 1 (09:37):
This is the best chicken burger period period.
Okay, it was that good.
So I'm driving out Omanthinking, oman, what a country,
what a place.
We shall go back for the KFC.
We'll go back for that place.
We'll go back to Alhambra,we'll go back to that wadi.
Next time we want to go toMuscat, because that seems

(09:59):
pretty sick, I'm down for Muscat.
That's what I'm telling you.

Speaker 3 (10:04):
Drop it down low with three word story.

Speaker 1 (10:08):
So, dylan, yep, what's up?
Two the words we've got andwhere, why we've chosen and what
we're doing right now.
The idea of this one was thatwe picked each other's three
words for the first time.
Yes, usually we find our ownbased on the place that we're
going to do.
This time, we were going toshare each other's and then
surprise each other with whatthat location is.
Now, we are not the kind ofpeople who are going to go uh,

(10:33):
you know, oh, and, by the way,you know, this happened when
actually we fucked up.
We got quite drunk on Friday.
We shared these places witheach other and, and you know, we
kind of ruined the surprise.
But fuck it, we're gonna go inwith it anyway.
We're gonna be honest with ouraudience.
We're gonna tell them exactlyhow it is that we, we did share
beforehand, but I can't actuallyremember what you did.
So, dylan, where did you thinkI would hide in an international

(10:59):
game of hide and seek, and why?

Speaker 2 (11:02):
well, I wish I could tell you specifically, because
that was, that was one of theissues like.
I obviously double checkedbecause I am kind of the one
that fucked it up in the firstplace, but I am the one who did
my words and, yes, curiosity didkill the cat and I found out
exactly exactly where, um, uh,where the location was

(11:24):
beforehand.
But there was an issue withyours and that's actually what
we never got to track down,because we had an excess of
seven beers.

Speaker 1 (11:39):
There was yes and above and I don't know how many
of the beers were consumed atthat point, but the memory was
quite, it's quite, scrubbed outat that point so we can
basically go from scratch onthis one.
So, dylan, where did you thinkI would hide in a game of hide
and seek, and why?

Speaker 2 (11:59):
I wonder if I can find it, but I'm not going to.
But it was something like Palm,palm Drive like Oceanic Drive,
whatever, but anyway can find it, but I'm not going to.
But it was something like palm,no, how was it?
Yeah, uh, palm drive like ocean, oceanic drive, whatever, but
anyway what it came down to andI thought it would be funny.
The same way I found out whatmy location was, which will get
onto like that, like in themoment.

(12:19):
If you had seen my face, I triedto to see if I can't have a
similar feel, or like thereaction out of you.

Speaker 1 (12:27):
Okay, and that was uh , I said you would, um, you
would hide in trump's mar-a-lagoestate I mean that that is a
good place to where you would beprobably the last place that
you would go, which makes sense,yeah, that's true, but there
was also another guy who wasunlikely to be there and he hid
in a bush, but he had a gun.

(12:47):
Now I do promise that I wouldnot have a gun if I was hiding
there.
I ain't about that.
I ain't about that, and I'm notmassively into golf as in, I'm
just shit at it.
So you know maybe that'sanother thing that I I wouldn't
hide there, um, but hey, I couldhide out there and just listen
to all the nonsenseconversations they have.

Speaker 2 (13:06):
I just figured it would be ironic.
Yeah, it'd probably be the lastplace.
You'd be Might be a good placebecause it's the last place.
And yes, you might not be thebiggest fan, without going too
deep into politics.
True, but imagine all thesecrets I would hear.

Speaker 1 (13:19):
They tell secrets like all over the place They'll
just put it on an order.
On a whatsapp group they'reprobably snapchatting, freaking
like federal documents to eachother.
I'll just be able to overhearit.
He puts documents in thebathroom.
He did that in his other home,so I'll just be able to walk
around learning all the secretthings.
Who killed jfk?
You know, like all thesedifferent conspiracies, I'll be

(13:41):
able to find out whilst hidingin an international game of hide
and seek.
So yeah, hiding in the shitterreading all these wonderful
documents.
So it does make sense and it isa learning journey as well Be
able to learn about all theseplaces as well.

Speaker 2 (13:53):
So so, yeah, that's that's.
Those were my my.
Well, that was a location thatI picked for you.
Um, okay, and what three?

Speaker 1 (14:02):
words.
Did that give me um?
In all honesty, I don't knowwell, fortunately, dylan, I have
them in front of me, so what?

Speaker 3 (14:10):
an arsehole question that is trapped motherfucker I
made you look like a okay, okay,okay, that was a that was a
horse if for those you who don'tknow what a horse is, I'll put
me out for that one.

Speaker 2 (14:25):
You're welcome.

Speaker 1 (14:28):
So that gave me Dylan my three words of pizzeria,
lambs and florist Pizzeria,lambs, florist, Great.
Now I think the issue came fromwhen I was trying to find
exactly where it was.
Was the lamb and lambs, ormaybe the order of the words,
because for three words yeah,what three words?

(14:49):
To work you need to put them inorder and you need to know if
there's a plural or not, which,again, if it's a dire case of
emergency, could cause issues.

Speaker 2 (14:56):
you know like I'm a pizza, or you'll just remember
it's lamb and not lambs right.

Speaker 1 (15:00):
So excuse me, sir, are you trying to tell me that
the word is a lamb or a group oflambs?
So right, they gave me thesethree words, which we'll get on
to shortly now.
For you, dylan, yes, I had toselect a place where I thought
it'd be a top quality place foryou to hide in an international
game of hide and seek.

(15:21):
And well, I'll let you tell,because you you had the
wonderful surprise.
I sent you the three words andyou, little naughty boy, went
out there and found out wherethis place was.
Tell the listeners at homewhere this place was so why, no,
he wasn't.

Speaker 2 (15:37):
He wasn't making a gun noise where's the uh,
where's the pop, god, uh, whenyou need him.
But no, it was korea centralzoo.
And you know what's funny is melooking at it?
Right, korea central zoo.
And it says right underneaththat old-fashioned animal
exhibits why are theyold-fashioned?

Speaker 1 (16:01):
why?

Speaker 2 (16:02):
would you specify old fashioned animal exhibits?
So they felt that that shouldbe known on this global
positioning app.
Is Korea Central Zoo oldfashioned animal exhibits?

Speaker 1 (16:15):
I wonder if that's how, so it's North Korea, by the
way.

Speaker 3 (16:18):
Pyongyang the capital of North Korea.

Speaker 1 (16:21):
And so maybe that's how it trans zoo translates, I
don't know into Korean that it'san old fashionedfashioned
animal.
But what is new fashion andwhat's old-fashioned are they
just like, like king kong stylecages they're hiding in?
Yeah what?

Speaker 2 (16:34):
I kind of picture is is like um circus styled like
almost, almost like animalsbeing in the circus, like where
dumbo was before he got released, like, and that's that's kind
of why we now evolved into whatis no longer known as
old-fashioned animal exhibits,but a bit more.

Speaker 1 (16:52):
New-fashioned yeah, new-fashioned, new-fashioned
animal exhibits.
It is now called enclosures notNot exited.

Speaker 2 (17:01):
Yeah, not exited.

Speaker 1 (17:02):
So the reason why I thought you would hide here,
dylan, oh, I've been dying toknow this, right.
Initially, initially I washovering around.
I was hovering around maps,thinking where would be an
entertaining place to put you,and I immediately went to
Pyongyang, right.
And why did I go to Pyongyang?

(17:23):
Because in my mind, I thoughtyou would think that, oh, I'll
go to Pyongyang, right.
And why did I go to Pyongyang?
Because in my mind I thoughtyou would think that, ooh, I'll
go to Korea.

Speaker 2 (17:29):
I just wanted to say you made that sound ooh.
And then I was like what's tofollow?

Speaker 1 (17:32):
Ooh ah-ah, no, not, ooh, ah-ah, no, no, no, no.
I wouldn't think that you aregoing to be in the exhibit.
I wouldn't think that I wouldthink lowly, view in a different
way, where you would go right,because in my mind it was like
okay, we need I, it's my turn tohide.
I found James in Mar-a-Lago.
Now I need to hide.
I'm gonna hide in Korea,because that is a like off by
China.

(17:53):
That's the middle of nowhere,and you're gonna be there on
your laptop and you're gonnathink, oh shit, which one's a
good and the bad one?
Oh god, oh, which, which?
Which one?
Should I go to the north or thesouth?
I mean, I know one of them mysoul.

Speaker 3 (18:10):
It would only work if you went to the right one yeah
and so you went, you followedyour seal and then you put the
other one and went to, and thenyou looked at, you, read
pyongyang and you went pyongyangand you were like well they
must have laser guns there space.

Speaker 2 (18:22):
Go, let's go.

Speaker 1 (18:23):
So yeah, that's, I thought you were there, sat down
thinking god north south north,south flips a coin and then bam
, you're off to pyongyang, right.
And then you go there and youwalk around and now, initially,
when I was hovering around, Idid see a building in the north
korea pyongyang zoo.
Uh, that looked enormously likea boob from the top.

(18:43):
So in my mind you'd be thinking, okay, where should I stay,
where should I look at in northkorea?
And you would see the boobbuilding and you'd go.
I want to spend my time in someold-fashioned animal exhibits
next to the boob building.
So I actually picked the wordsthat were bang on north korea
zoo, but nearby was the, theboob building right, yeah and
then the other reason why Ithought maybe why korea?

(19:04):
is because you, dylan, wouldfeel like a giant there, right,
you would walk around, you wouldfeel like you are king of the
castle there.
You know there's old-fashionedanimal exhibits, you know
everyone is catering to whateveryour needs are and you'd feel
like a total demon.
You know, not many people go topyongyang, so I think that that
you would feel, you know,almighty there and I want that
for you, and you would get tohide there, chill out with some

(19:27):
gorillas, leopards or whateverold fish fashion animals that
they have a dodo maybe.
Um, they could have anythingthere.
They have a boot building, sowho knows?
So that gave you.
What three words, dylan?

Speaker 2 (19:39):
etchings which I had to google.

Speaker 1 (19:41):
Uh slam revisit okay, wow uh, on hindsight that's
they're quite mean words.
I don't know if we've been thatkind to each other.
It took me a while to reallykind of figure out where I was
going to go with it, but we gotthere in the end.
Um dylan for deciding who goesfirst, I guess we'll just do uh,

(20:02):
no, no sorry, just a thought.

Speaker 2 (20:05):
Every now and again a thought pops up.

Speaker 1 (20:07):
That was dangerous.

Speaker 2 (20:09):
Yeah, it was quite funny because I saw a reel the
other day on Instagram of SouthAfricans playing rock paper
scissors and yeah, it's prettyfucking funny that that's the
way we do.

Speaker 1 (20:24):
What gun?
Gun carrot.
No, Ching Chong Chao.
Yeah, okay, so we're going backto Ching Chong Chao.

Speaker 2 (20:29):
Well, no, we don't have to, but I wanted to show
you the video afterwards.

Speaker 1 (20:33):
Okay, well, you know, because it's, because it's you
know, because we're going toPyongyang zoo.
Okay, is it called again Ching?

Speaker 2 (20:41):
You're just like I don't want to say this.

Speaker 1 (20:44):
Ching, yeah, chong Chao Chao.
Okay, right, so we're going togo, uh, ching Chong Chao, and
then, and then we'll decide whogoes first.

Speaker 2 (20:52):
Right Right, ching Chong Chao.

Speaker 1 (20:55):
Uh, oh, I was doing the gun.
I thought that's what ChingChong Chow was the gun.

Speaker 2 (21:02):
No, Rabbit carrot, no , it's rock paper scissors.
We just it's too difficult tosay Rock paper scissors, so we
say Ching Chong Chow InAfrikaans.

Speaker 1 (21:09):
Okay, right so we're going to do Rock paper scissors,
but Ching Chong Chow yeah.

Speaker 2 (21:11):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (21:12):
Ching Chong Chow.
Ching Chong Chow.
Ah Right, dylan.
Yes, james, you may.
Champs, you may go first.
Thank you, my, because you didgive me this wonderful tea to go
for your coffee.
So the wheels, are you watchingat home?
It is a golf tee.
How fucking hilarious am.
I didn't mean to throw that you.

Speaker 2 (21:29):
By the way, that was very aggressive actually it's uh
, it's pretty funny because Imeant to give you the other one,
which is right next to it, andit's a trump one so yeah, wow,
that would have been a nicelittle full circle moment.
I'm.
I'm being serious.

Speaker 1 (21:43):
I think it's on the ground, but anyway, there's
something sharp up my anus, soit could have been on the chair
of the whole team.
Well, dylan, let's hit me withwhatever three words you had of
freaking sketch pow, bam, slambam.

Speaker 3 (21:57):
Thank you, man.
Drop it down low with threeword story.

Speaker 1 (22:12):
Right, so itchings slam revisit.
Oh, and do you want to clarifyany of those words for our
listeners at home?

Speaker 2 (22:16):
yeah, sure I can.
Let me just go back to fuckinggoogle.

Speaker 1 (22:20):
Let me go back to dictionarycom.

Speaker 2 (22:21):
Yeah, is part of a printmaking process in which
lines or areas are incised,sized using acid, into a metal
plate in order to hold the ink.

Speaker 1 (22:37):
That was the horse of curiosity.
That was very nice.
Yeah, it was a good horse, good.

Speaker 2 (22:41):
I don't know what the sound of a horse is.
That's the sound of a horse.

Speaker 1 (22:45):
That's the sound you didn't know.
Do you want me to?

Speaker 3 (22:47):
go over again, so this one's a horse and this one
is a.

Speaker 1 (22:52):
I thought it was a lamb, but on close inspection it
could be a goat.

Speaker 2 (22:54):
Yeah, but a horse doesn't bark right.
But what do you call that, thesound that?

Speaker 3 (22:58):
the horse actually.

Speaker 2 (22:59):
Fuck off.

Speaker 3 (23:00):
You call it winnieing .

Speaker 2 (23:01):
Yes, that's a terrible no.

Speaker 3 (23:03):
Really.

Speaker 1 (23:04):
Yeah, it's called winnieing Okay.

Speaker 3 (23:06):
Or neighing.
I guess Neighing.

Speaker 1 (23:07):
Neighing or winning.
No, no, no, horse people areweird, so they'd call it weird
Horse people are weird, right,so yeah, right.

Speaker 2 (23:26):
So we had Etchins and we had Slam Revisit.
I'm not sure if you are awareof the plot of 21 and 22 Jump
Street.
Vaguely, dylan, vaguely, but Iwould love to know where you're
going with this Right.
So basically you have.
It's an undercover operation ofadults looking slightly younger
and then kind of doing a.
Basically is it a stingoperation.

Speaker 3 (23:46):
Yeah, I'd say sting.

Speaker 2 (23:55):
Sting operation to then infiltrate this drug
syndicate busy in around highschools and or then the college
which is then the follow-upmovie Right?
So just to remind you of thecharacters, though, you've got
Captain Dixon, who is played byMr Cube, mr.

Speaker 1 (24:08):
Cube.

Speaker 2 (24:10):
You can't call him just Ice.

Speaker 1 (24:12):
Cube.
Okay, I guess you don't knowhim.
We're not personally acquaintedwith Mr.

Speaker 3 (24:16):
Cube.

Speaker 1 (24:17):
But for those who are friendly with him, they would
call him Ice Cube.

Speaker 2 (24:21):
Ice.

Speaker 1 (24:21):
Cube.
But because we're not close, Iwouldn't dare.

Speaker 2 (24:24):
I don't want to disrespect mr, not on a first
name basis.
Okay, right, so mr cube.
Yeah, captain dixon.
Uh, jenko is played by, uh, thelovely channing tatum.
Okay, yeah, mr tatum, mr tatum.
Yeah, uh, schmidt is mr hill,so jonah hill, yes and one that
is in our famous theme park.

Speaker 1 (24:42):
We have a.
We have a whole exit exitthere's the flam we were talking
about there we go, so but Ithink we can call him Jonah Hill
because we have.
We have a whole exhibit in oneof our famous theme park from
episode fuck knows anyway, yes,right, so those, those are
basically.

Speaker 2 (25:02):
Oh, and Eric, who is, uh, from the first movie I mean
, I'm not going to go throughthe whole course, but played by,
uh, mr franco, dave franco,little brother of the older one,
the older icon, icon.
Okay, no matter who they are.

Speaker 1 (25:18):
They're all in mr franco, I assume.

Speaker 2 (25:19):
Mr franco, yes, so basically story captain dixon
wanted to reopen.
I assume, mr Frank, yes.
So basically a story.
Captain Dixon wanted to reopenthe case of Cynthia's murder.
Now Cynthia is the person thatwent missing in the second
installment, 22 Jump Street, orthe 22nd installment, 22 Jump

(25:42):
Street, or the 22nd in store,and because he received he
received a note from Cynthia'smom, also called Cynthia right
she discovered some etchings on,specifically, a metal plate,
because I think I read that,because Google said so Because

(26:04):
Google said so In the backyardand underneath that, inside a
capsule sort of thing, was apoem, right?

Speaker 3 (26:18):
Sorry, cause of curiosity.

Speaker 2 (26:19):
Yeah, he's quite the mouthy.
Fella Was a poem and in thispoem it kind of gave clues and
addressed where she was and whathad happened, and then just to
kind of give a bit of insightagain as to what drug was on the

(26:45):
loose back then.
On the loose Making the roundsback then was the drug called
Wi-Fi Wi-Fi, a drug called Wi-FiWi-Fi but spelt with Ys.

Speaker 1 (27:01):
So Wi-Fi Fi and what is a Wi-Fi?
How would wi-fi make me?

Speaker 2 (27:08):
feel, listen, it will put you on a level and I'm
assuming because I do not dodrugs, james yes, good, I just
wanted to reiterate that don'tdo drugs.
Yeah, don't do drugs kids.
No, I mean, it probably startswith a little bit of sensation
on the fingers, just to knowthat, yes, I did consume

(27:29):
something that I probablyshouldn't have.
Right, and, needless to say,people do that, they actually.
Your face goes numb, but it's agood numbness, because that's
what good numbness is.
And at the same time, yes, itdoes the same as all the other
drugs in terms of hallucinations, maybe just with an extra bit

(27:51):
of kick, almost like you took abit of a hit of cocaine.
So, hallucinations, energy ofcocaine, boom there, you've got
Wi-Fi.

Speaker 1 (28:02):
Okay, so you've got Wi-Fi.
I tell you who is interestedthe horse, curious horse, yeah,
okay well.

Speaker 2 (28:09):
So the poem reads as follows Wow, we have a poem here
, my goodness.

Speaker 3 (28:17):
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 (28:20):
And also I'm not sure if you are aware of Jenko not
Jenko Schmidt's slam poetryreading in the second film.
I am not Dylan, so basicallyjust to give you a refresher.
This was the quick poem.

(28:41):
Okay, thank you.
The slam poem, slam poetry,yelling angry, waving my hands,
a lot, specific view.
Specific point of view onthings sin, thea, sin.

(29:04):
Jesus died for us.
Cynthia's Jesus cried.
Runaway bride, julia Roberts.
Julia Roberts, cynthia, cynthia, you're dead, you're dead.

(29:25):
Beep bop, beep, boom, you'redead.

Speaker 1 (29:29):
So that was like I was watching the film.
Yeah, it was like I waswatching Mr Hill himself.
Yeah, so.

Speaker 2 (29:35):
So that was.
That was basically his rend,not his rendition.
That was his poem, and this wasnow Cynthia's, and I'm assuming
after seeing the movie shetried to redeem herself with
this poem.
Okay, actually, she probablydidn't redeem herself.
Well, with your delivery, I'msure it's going to be excellent.

(29:59):
So, poem titled Wi-Fi, wi-fi why, fi, leaving me here to die?
You feel I'm in this messbecause of a drug deal.
I'm in trouble.
Jenko and Schmidt, help on thedouble.
I didn't know how I'd come tothis, took a turn south and now

(30:25):
I'm in the wild collectingfirewood and drinking juice yes,
juice, because piss didn'trhyme.
And I got loose, kidnapped me,they tried.
I'm sounding like Dr Seuss, Itried, I'm sounding like Dr
Seuss, I tried.

(30:50):
On my escape I grabbed a whiffof egg rolls.
Didn't know if it meant help ormeant holes, but something
smelled off like deep friedmalice.
Could it be those from wuhanpalace and johnny?
Johnny, you'd know what to doif they hadn't put two in you.

(31:15):
If only dep was still on thecase, not getting shot in the
fucking face.
But instead they sent these twofools my way Jenko, mr Tatum
because he looks good in thelight of day, and Schmidt
because he worked with Scorseseone time.

(31:37):
Now they think he can solve acrime.
I think this kid's in jail, buttrace it back to Eric and for
him to unveil.
If this makes no sense, neitherdoes this clue.
I guess Dylan needed somethingfor you to listen to.

Speaker 1 (31:57):
Wow, I don't have an applause You're going to have to
have, oh fuck.
You're just going to have tohave lots of goats just cheering
you.
They love it, they absolutelylove it.

Speaker 2 (32:10):
Wow, they sound more excited than the previous time.

Speaker 1 (32:13):
I do have to say Maybe I'm just Because that was
incredible slam poetry.

Speaker 2 (32:15):
Did you write that yourself?
I actually wrote this myself.

Speaker 1 (32:18):
No, no, bullshit.
We have a slam poet right infront of us.
You just slammed me with yourpoetry.
Yeah, yeah, don't get me wrong,I was completely off the cuff,
but no I obviously had this uhyeah, fucking idea, but no, I
thought I thought it was, Iwould say, when I heard the word
malice dylan, I was like I hadto ask chat, chat, gpt to dumb

(32:42):
it down because nobody wouldbelieve yeah, that's, that's
true, but you're like sosophisticated dylan hats off to
you.
I don't want my wearing one but,here we go I will dock my cap
uh, that was incredible and I do.
You know what you should justsend?
We'll, we'll take thisrecording and we'll send it some
producers and I think you'vegot the whole 23.

Speaker 2 (33:01):
Jump Street now, yeah , so there we go yeah, you've
got the whole premise for thefor the next one from the 23.
So and and for the people thatknow the um, the layers, or like
the plot of the film, thesecond and the first and the
second, like wuhan palace, right, like in the beginning in the
first film he was like it smellslike egg rolls, right, and

(33:22):
that's, that's eric's car thatruns on fucking egg rolls.

Speaker 1 (33:26):
That's how deep we're going.
That is you are.
I wonder what all thosenotepads and everything were
down there in the DVD boxes of21 and 22 Jump Street.
You really got it and like allthe stuff all over the walls,
like with the string connectingall the different pictures and
the subplots.
I didn't wonder what they were.
I didn't know they were goingto be with your story.

Speaker 2 (33:45):
You just thought I was weird.
And yes, james, I am weird.
However, yes, james, I am weird, however, it was not that.
But yeah, this one came outfairly nice, that was good.

Speaker 1 (33:55):
I can't wait to capture them and put it all over
the internet, and I also don'tknow what the fuck I'm doing
with my hands.

Speaker 2 (34:00):
For those who was looking.

Speaker 3 (34:02):
For some reason this finger was pulled back the whole
time?

Speaker 1 (34:05):
Why were you two in the pink and one in the stinking
yeah?

Speaker 3 (34:14):
No, not bring the horse into this Curious, curious
horse.
Curious horse is interestingthat is your.

Speaker 1 (34:18):
That is your slam poetry name, by the way.
Dj two in the pink one in thestink, yo, yo what up and I
assume everyone who has listenedto this completely understands
what two in the pink, one in thestink means to your middle
finger and your forefinger.
Your third finger, your weddingfinger ring folded in and then
your pinky stinking out there,then that will penetrate the

(34:40):
stink and then you're two forthe pink.
So, dj, two in the pink, one inthe stink.
That was good, hats off to you.
And your three words again wereWere etchings.

Speaker 2 (34:53):
I think we got that from the very beginning where
they found the etchings Etchings, revisit, reopen.
You kind of were close enough,you were revisiting the films
for everyone, so I would acceptthat.

Speaker 1 (35:02):
And now I want to go watch 21 and 22 Jump Street and
work on 23.
Jump Street which I'm sureeveryone would be interested in,
and uh, well, obviously thethird one was slam, which is
slam poetry.
I want to see more slam poetryfrom you.
Okay, sure, that is my as mywish going forward.
All right, I want more slampoetry because no one is asking
for any more christmas crampus.

(35:23):
But I am asking for more slampoetry from you.
All right, you got it.
Exceptional stuff, dylan, fuckme, that was loud, oopsie,
poopsie.

Speaker 3 (35:34):
Drop it down low with three word story Now.

Speaker 1 (35:39):
Dylan yeah, let's get back.
Let's get down to business Now.
You put in a lot of effort intoyour three words.
Thank you.

Speaker 3 (35:49):
I did not.
All right, your three words,thank you, I did not all right,
so we have.

Speaker 1 (35:53):
Uh, this is a very loose and fast story, as they
usually are, to be fair, but um,you really slammed me with your
slam poetry so I'm up againstthe ropes, you slam me, you've
freaking, uppercut me left,right, but we're here.
We're here now and I I do have atrue story for you, dylan.
This time it's been a whileBeen a while Since I've come at
you with a true story.

(36:13):
Way back when, on the beginningpodcast, I did come at you with
a lot of true stories you didAllegedly true stories and then
I wistfully went away and didsome musicals, did some Q&As.
You've actually taken us on ajourney.

Speaker 2 (36:28):
Taken on a journey and that's why I also don't
believe this whole got you Pointnumber one.
It's not a competition.
Point number two I don'tbelieve the fact that you say
you are on the ropes because youknow who worked the ropes.
Did the old rope-a-dope?

Speaker 1 (36:42):
Yeah, I'm not sure who it was a boxer.
A boxer did once upon a time.

Speaker 2 (36:50):
I think it was Ali against Frazier.
I think that's what it wasprobably one of them.

Speaker 1 (36:53):
One did the rope it up.
Well, it's funny.
You should say it's notcompetition, but I did actually
go back and listen to thebeginnings of our first couple
of episodes.
Uh, not too long ago, uh, andyou want awful, no, but we
actually said.
The whole premise was that itwas going to be a competition
between you and me.
I don't know how we were evergoing to judge that, because
there was no one listening andthere was no one watching us.
So complete stupid thing fromfrom our point of view.

(37:13):
But we've come a long way,dylan.
We did some nonsensical stuffalong the way and we are here,
episode 21.
So our podcast now is legallyable to drink in the United
States, which is fantastic, andwe've come a while.
Come a while.
So, dylan, I'm bringing you atrue story.
This true story is based inNorthern Italy.
Okay, now this is going torequire some imagination and

(37:37):
some input from yourself andfrom myself.
So we're going to, I'm going togive you a character, I'm going
to be a character and I'm goingto, we're going to walk through
this story together.
So I'm going to, I'm going togive the kind of the pillars I
want us to create some, sometrue improv and some real, some
real character story.
You know, I want people at hometo feel like, oh my god, they

(37:59):
were in this time between thesetwo characters and we will see
how it unfolds.
Now there is a little bit of umcontroversy of who really got
one over the other in this story.
So, for the sake of our story,later on we are going to use the
medium of game to decide whowins in our story, because I

(38:20):
don't want to take one side orthe other.
I don't want to be, I don'twant to be tarred with that
brush, okay?
So, dylan, we're in northernitaly, we're in the 1940s, right
when you only need to closeyour eyes metaphorically, don't
really do?
It's a bit weird if I justspeak to you with your eyes
closed, oh, you kind of feelwhatever, I don't want to do it
whatever makes you happy yeah, Iwill be vincenzo, I am, and I

(38:42):
I'm working in my local pizzeria.
I'm a young man and I have my,my local pizzeria.
I'm a young man and I have my,my local pizzeria making pizzas,
naturally.
Sure and Fuluccio.
He is well known around thetown.
It's a good businessman, okay,and he operates a couple of

(39:04):
farming machinery smallcompanies and he's just running
his own business.
It's a nice man, okay, does thestuff for the public.
He also has an animal bestfriend.
As I said, he works in farming.
Don't make me a donkey.

Speaker 2 (39:21):
Like the one opportunity you had.
Hold on, Don't make me afucking sheep or a horse now.
No, no no.
Don't worry.
That's why I have these.

Speaker 1 (39:34):
That's why I have those, so don't worry.

Speaker 2 (39:38):
That's on my brothers .

Speaker 1 (39:40):
You just went down a whole tangent of you just going
oh no, thankfully, dylan, youare not.
You are going to be a wholereal person.
Okay, you, dylan, you are avery fashionable man called Enzo
.
Okay, your name is Enzo, it's agood name, that's pretty cool.

(40:01):
He works across the street inmy.
You're my competition, right,you have, I have, a pizzeria.
You have a lasagna Okay, so youoperate the.
You have a lasagna okay, so youoperate the town's best lasagna
.
I operate the town's bestpizzeria.
Okay, so we're directcompetition across from each
other.
If someone's gonna go havelasagna.

(40:22):
They ain't having pizza.
Someone's having pizza, theyain't having lasagna.
Okay, so we we're not the bestof friends, we're in constant
competition with each other.
Okay, so I have my little lambfriend who comes with me and
everyone comes and sees mylittle lamb.
You, on the other hand, have asmall miniature horse.
Okay, uh, I'll let you name him.
You call him whatever you want.

(40:42):
What do you want to call him?
He's a small little what's yourname again.

Speaker 2 (40:45):
What's?
Your name is fruccio.
Okay, in that case I will callhim vincenzo vincenzo.

Speaker 1 (40:51):
Yeah, okay.
So you have Vincenzo and I haveLamb, who is simply called
Lambo, which, on hindsight,should have seen that coming.
You know, I wish I had more ofa cuter noise.
I didn't know there was More ofa scream at the end, so we'll
just ignore that, okay so I haveLambo, you have V Rambo, you
have Vincenzo.
Okay and Okay.

Speaker 2 (41:14):
He's very feisty.
He's very feisty Now.

Speaker 1 (41:16):
Fiducio and Enzo.
They are competing over thelocal florist Celia.
She's a beautiful lady, Tall,blonde, loves flowers.
She goes around deliveringflowers in the morning to my
local pizzeria, to your lasagnaI haven't seen an ugly florist
before.

(41:36):
I'll tell you that fuck me right, anyone, anyone write in um the
three word story at gmailcom.
Have you ever seen an uglyflorist before?
I've seen an old florist, but Iwould not call them ugly
because they're old, becausethat's ageist and I don't
believe in that.
So I've seen elderly floristswho are sweet and lovely but I
wouldn't say they're ugly.
But that is true.

Speaker 2 (41:57):
Email is at the three word story at gmailcom let us
know, have you seen an uglyflorist who's saying like it is
exclusively older and uglypeople.

Speaker 1 (42:07):
That's why they fuck with flowers to make themselves
feel better.
Basically no, I'm sure all right, I'm sure in, maybe in south
africa uh, they're sexy florists, I don't know.
But we are competing for theheart of celia, uh-huh, okay.
So for the first bit of uhdrama, okay, I'm gonna set the
scene.
I'm gonna come into yourlasagna, okay, as Frutio, and

(42:32):
I'm annoyed, you've beenthrowing eyes at Celia.
I'm trying to make it work withher, okay, and I'm going to
come, come at you, okay, and I'mgoing to challenge you.
Okay, you don't know what thechallenge is yet, right?
Okay, it will become clear, andthen we're going to talk about

(42:52):
that challenge.
Does that make sense?
Sure, okay.
So, all right, you are Enzo, Iam Fruccio and scene.
Enzo, I have seen you lookingat my woman, celia.
She is my beautiful, fair maid.
And why are you looking at mywoman in your stupid lasagna?
What have you?

Speaker 2 (43:09):
got to say for yourself, your lady Celia,
please do not make me ticklemyself.

Speaker 1 (43:21):
Enzo, get your hands out of your armpits.
It is very weird, and knowingyou touched your lasagna with
your armpit hands makes me feelvery uncomfortable.

Speaker 2 (43:36):
Listen.
For you who did not know, it isa metaphor for do not make me
laugh, so tickle myself is tosay to make myself laugh, to say

(43:59):
to make myself laugh so if youwere to, were to have been
exactly like that, been more toschool, you would understand a
metaphor.

Speaker 1 (44:02):
well, enzo, I do not like you insulting my
intelligence.
You are a pain in my ass, and Ido not mean physically a pain
in my ass.
I'm not saying that you aresomething that is within my
asshole, because that would beweird and I do not want that.
I mean metaphorically you are apain in my ass.
Do you understand Now what I'mhere to tell you, enzo?

(44:22):
With your stupid lasagne, withyour pasta, your sauce, your
pasta, your sauce and your pastaMagnifique.

Speaker 3 (44:37):
That is French Magnifique.

Speaker 1 (44:40):
Magnifique, you just put an O at the end, I'm pretty
sure.
So, anyway, I am telling youand your stupid sheets of pasta
sauce and pasta sauce, and pastasauce to stay away from my
woman and keep your miniaturehorse away from my pizzeria.

Speaker 2 (44:58):
He is upsetting my little Lambo, as you can tell at
the end, your little pet Lamboshould be so lucky to have the
company of my beautiful Vincenzo, who is a Shetland pony.

Speaker 1 (45:17):
It is not, it's a.
It is too.
It's like a little patheticstallion down there.
I want them to stay away and Itell you what, enzo, we are
going to settle this beeflasagna once, and for all.

Speaker 2 (45:29):
Beef lasagna, alright .
I believe that is the Italianway to squash the this beef
lasagna once and for all.
Beef lasagna, all right.

Speaker 1 (45:32):
I believe that is the Italian way to squash the beef.
It's a beef lasagna.

Speaker 2 (45:37):
You can be glad it is not a lamb.

Speaker 1 (45:41):
We are going to battle over the heart of Celia
once and for all In the localtown, soapbox Dalby.
In the Soapbox Dalby, as youwell, well know because you live
in the same town as me, but I'mjust going to announce it as if
people were listening to us ona podcast audio.
Each business owner in the towntakes their fair animal friend

(46:07):
and they put them within asoapbox car and they race down
to the bottom of the hill andI'm telling you now, dylan,
whoever wins this race will getthe heart of Celia.
I see you're frowning, dylanso.

Speaker 2 (46:24):
Why no?
I am just simply thinking, justin case you try.
You try and get out of the factthat I will win.
I do not.
I want you to lay down therules.
I want you to make sure thateverything is confirmed

(46:46):
beforehand, so that I know myfriend, not my friend, my enemy,
my frenemy is when I win.
You will have nothing and noexcuses to come back to me.

Speaker 1 (46:57):
I tell you now, enzo, I tell you now, once my car and
my Lambo cross the finish line,to begin with, we will have
nothing to do with each other,only on the track.
But the lady, she shall be mine.

Speaker 2 (47:15):
All right, so soapbox racing and name the time.
You have got the place.
What are we doing?
And uh yeah, give give me theinfo to to shut you out of my
life I will see you tomorrow atthe cracker.

Speaker 1 (47:34):
Done for the race and so and scene.
So there we are, we've set thepicture, we've set the scene.
Okay, enzo ferruuccio, they arebitter enemies and now you know
that they are going to beinvolved in the soapbox derby of
this town and where the animalfriends of the business owners
are then put into the soapboxand they race down the hill.

(47:57):
Now, the rules of this aresimple no visible electronic or
engine power.
It must be your traditionalsoapbox, okay.
So I want you now to visualizeit and I want you to think how
would you get your smallminiature horse into your
soapbox?
How would you design it and why?
Okay, because I'm thinking,right, it's going to be, it's

(48:19):
going to have to be somethingyou're going to take apart
quickly.
It's tomorrow, okay, it can'tbe anything like a super mega
car, right?
So I'm thinking my lamb is goingto be strapped into a ski
toboggan.
Okay, I'm going to take onefrom my garage.
Okay, I'm going to have a skitoboggan, because it's northern
italy, they're going to havethose, right, this is going to
have the curved front to it,okay?

(48:40):
And then I have two bicyclesand two of my bicycles.
I'm going to take the wheelsoff and I'm going to put them on
upside.
It should have good, goodhandling.
They're going to spin aroundquite well.
They're going to have little,teeny, tiny coaster wheels and
it's going to roll on down.
Okay, the front of the tobogganwill curve over and it will

(49:00):
protect freduccio's dear lambert, okay.
So he's going to look after himand he's going to be able to
sit down and be be pretty good.
Okay, does that make sense?

Speaker 2 (49:10):
it does make sense, and well, yeah, and the fact
that I had to google what afucking toboggan is, uh, because
, yeah, we don't, we don't havesnow no, no, famously so, um,
yeah, I had to google that.
Now I know I actually thinkit's a, it's a fairly, fairly
sturdy idea.
Um, no, I think it's fine, butand then, yet again, I also

(49:31):
don't want to comment too much,because I do have a bit of a?
Um, a bias at this particularpoint, leaning towards uh, um,
enzo, yeah yeah, well, good,okay.

Speaker 1 (49:43):
So what?
What's enzo enzo gonna do?
How's he gonna shape himself?
A, that's what I call him endsends.

Speaker 2 (49:48):
Okay, wow, you really really embodied yourself with
that character.
That is exceptional, right,that's incredible.
Um, actually no, because hecan't figure out his fucking
accent.

Speaker 1 (49:57):
Oh, yeah, I'm worried that it come across slightly,
uh, vampirey maybetrans-american.

Speaker 2 (50:05):
Like I thought the same thing, but anyway, yeah you
know what?

Speaker 1 (50:07):
again the three-word story at gmailcom.
Please let us know.
Uh, our italian friend, big fanof ours, daniele, I'm sure will
let us know and probably willnever listen to us ever again
after this uh, probablyderogatory, uh podcast.
So how are you designing yourhorse soapbox?
In what are you going to throwit in?
Imagine you're in your garageback at home.
What have you got in therethat's going to be able to house
your miniature horse?

Speaker 2 (50:28):
and why so what I was saying?
Well, what I initially thoughtwas why over over complicate the
process and just slap some.
Slap some wheels on there.

Speaker 3 (50:38):
Okay, just be like okay, fine, yeah, on the horse
fuck.

Speaker 1 (50:42):
Okay, I didn't even wow, you have blown me away.

Speaker 2 (50:44):
So that's what I thought.
But and I thought they mightnot be and like maybe maybe he
kind of um, like he's got, he'sgot four normally they've got
four legs and um, so I was likethis isn't a special five-legged
or three-legged horse oldest,and most of them are five-legged
horse.

(51:04):
So let me just say, um, but no,I thought no, that might just
confuse him.
So I need to to have uh,something solid like he need.
He needs to be able to push offof something.
So maybe I'll just attach twowheels on the front and then
have them kind of just be still.
So maybe some, some other, someother, uh, what do you call it?

(51:26):
Um, I just need him his, hisfront legs to be still and then
he can push off of his back legs.
So we'll put some some wheelson the front and horsepower at
the back.

Speaker 3 (51:37):
Horsepower, oh I like that.

Speaker 1 (51:40):
You got horsepower in there, genuinely, this is you
didn't have no idea this wascoming and you've just come out.
Those were the notes underneaththe bed.
You just you have everyeventuality of what could come
and be like right.
So if he wants, if he wants meto play a character, called enzo
.

Speaker 3 (51:58):
First of all, I'll call him ends.

Speaker 1 (52:00):
And then this is how I would design the horse in the
soapbox in the city in the 1940s.

Speaker 2 (52:06):
Okay, so you?

Speaker 1 (52:06):
are going to use full-blown horsepower to use
this horse to go down.
Yeah, okay, yeah, brilliant now, as I said before, and knee
guards and knee guards.

Speaker 2 (52:18):
You want to look after your horse, he's your,
yeah yeah, maybe I'm just goinginto this too deeply, but I was
just thinking like if the slopeis too kind of steep and he's
he's hind legs can't keep up,they might be dragging.
Um, so then he would need someknee guards, okay.

Speaker 1 (52:37):
Well, that's very nice Ends is a great looker
after of animals.
Now again, as I said before, tosimulate this, because,
naturally, to now go out andfind a miniature horse and lamb,
create these two things whichby your standard would, may it
may have a lot of animal abuseas well, so you know it's it,

(52:58):
and it's going to be hard, andthere are next to no hills in
this entire city, so to find ahill that we can even it's a lot
of groundwork, so we're goingto simulate it with a computer
game.
Oh, okay, so I have devised avery quick track.
There is only one button to use.
You don't even have to steer inthis, it steers itself.
And that is going to be.

(53:18):
We're going to put down inhistory forever the whoever wins
between me for lucioio and you,enz is the winner of all time.
Does that make sense to you?
Okay, so I'm going to have toturn this around here.
It's screen recording, so forthose at home, they will be able
to see what you're seeing.
Okay, oh, my God.

(53:38):
And okay, we can edit this bitout.
This is fine.
Now we can put this around here, we can take that out there and
then we can put.
Put this round here.
Okay, so can you see this here,dim?
Can you see that, right, you?

Speaker 2 (53:50):
got that.
I should probably do this.

Speaker 1 (53:53):
Yes, yes, right, so we're going to do a practice
round so you can see exactlywhat is going to happen.
Okay, so there is one button.
For the life of me, I cannotremember what that button is.
We're just going to.
We're going to, we're going togo this here.
Okay, I'm going to press singleplayer and then I'm going to
let you choose your car.
Right, I'm just going to go onthis one to begin with.
Okay, does?

Speaker 3 (54:14):
that make sense.

Speaker 1 (54:14):
Now this is the car Now that I believe the one
button is this button, it is theup arrow, and then you're just
going to press up and you haveto get to the end of the track.
Okay, I'm going to leave itthere.
I have played this once, Ipromise you.
I've played this once and it'sinteresting.
Okay, all right, that is thegame.
That is what's going to settleonce and for all between

(54:37):
ferruccio and enzo, and who getscelia?
Exactly who gets celia?
So illin, first of all in thebackground, to make this even
more Italian, which is somethingI should have done before, but
didn't Got some Italian-likemusic in the background.

Speaker 2 (54:55):
What do you mean?
Even more Italian.
It's the only thing that makesit Italian, I think, whatever
the fuck we've been doing.

Speaker 1 (55:04):
Alright, that you're talking about, Right?
So, Dylan, we're going to beback in the scene.
Enzo, I hope you are ready fortoday's race.
As you well know, this is atime trial where each of our
sub-october cars they will godown the hill and they will see

(55:25):
whoever is quickest.
Whoever will win the race, youknow, gets the hand of Celia.
Do you understand, Adil?

Speaker 3 (55:34):
Enzo is your actual name.

Speaker 1 (55:36):
I call you Dylan behind your back because I think
you are a dildo so I call youDylan the dildo, these insults.

Speaker 2 (55:45):
Do not insult me, because I could not find
anything else to say.

Speaker 1 (55:50):
Well, to see which of our animal-powered cars go
first.
We are going to have a game ofChinio, Chowio, Chonio.
Are you ready, Dylan, for thegame of?

Speaker 2 (56:06):
rock paper scissors.
I think I've played this gamebefore with my South African
friend.

Speaker 1 (56:11):
I believe you have.
Are you ready?
I am Cinio.
Cianio, cionio, you have wonD'Alessandro.
This is the only victory youwill have today.
Who do you choose to take thetrack first?

Speaker 2 (56:25):
You know what Verlucio?
I like to see people fail and Ilike to see them fail, and I
just repeated the same thing.

Speaker 3 (56:36):
Are you having a moment to your face, hold?

Speaker 2 (56:38):
on.
I rewind in my mind.
I would like to see people fail.
I would like to see people fail.
I would like to see them failfast and fail first Hugo.

Speaker 1 (56:55):
Oh, enzio, as you wish, let me have a quick
discussion with my Lambo friend.
Lambo, you can do this, myfriend.
You steer this ship To the veryend and you'll get me the heart
of Celia.
Do you understand?
He was, he, was he was veryexcited.

(57:20):
He was agreeing Extra hardthere, as you can tell.
So I am setting Lambo up on thetrack and for the people
listening at home.
This is really a podcast as youcan see, dylan, ditchak, lambo

(57:42):
is on and I would select thisare you ready, lambo?
Are you ready to go?
Go, go, lambo, go, go Lambo.
Oh, it's got it.
It's avoiding.
There is debris on the road,there are some pigeons there.

(58:02):
Oh, lambo, you can do this Forme, for my woman, celia.
Celia, your heart will be mine.
Oh, he's taken a ditch off thetrack.
Oh, we have rescued it again.
Go, lambo, go.

Speaker 2 (58:15):
Do not worry, Vincenzo.
Do not worry.
21 seconds.
You think may be fast, but youwill beat him.

Speaker 1 (58:27):
So, enzozo, as you can see, malambo did it in a
time of 21 and 38 seconds, whichis much longer than I
anticipated when I put thisthing together.
There may be a requirement ofsome editing, but we will see
requirements of some editing.
So remember, enzo, it is thisbutton there, do you?

(58:49):
understand and for dramaticpurposes.
We just want to make sure thatthe the only thing that is
Italian in this whole podcast isplaying this whole time.
Are you ready, Enzo?
I am ready.
Select your vehicle.
Vehicle With what was yourhorse's name again.

Speaker 3 (59:14):
I'll ask him, don't worry.

Speaker 1 (59:15):
That's a stupid name.

Speaker 2 (59:18):
How curious are you Vincenzo?
Vincenzo, my name is Enzo EnzoVincenzo, three, two, one and go
oh my God, the horse is goingdown on the soapbox.

Speaker 1 (59:30):
He's screaming and shouting, he's falling off.
Oh, he's all over the place.
Enzo, you are the worst soapboxfreak I have ever seen in my
life.
Your horse cannot drive asoapbox at all.
You are the woman shall be mine.
This is a bullshit.

(59:55):
It is, as we can see, enzo.
Celia Hart is mine.
Come to me, celia, come to me.
Mwah mwah.
Oh, every little chill.
You are such a handsome man.
I love you so much, enzo.
What you have to say?

Speaker 2 (01:00:13):
for yourself.
This game was rigged.
This is this is why I wanted tohave the rules set up, because
you never told me I um the trackwould be so shitty.

Speaker 1 (01:00:28):
It is with the same track for both of us.
Enzo, away with you till you'rea lasagna.
And I tell you what, for thismoment forth, enzo, we shall be
the ultimate of nemesis and weshall compete with each other
only on the track, and we willimprove our soapbox cars and we

(01:00:49):
will increase this horsepowerand the speed and the quality,
and that is how truly that wewill battle each other.

Speaker 2 (01:00:58):
It sounds stupid.
I want another chance, a top ofshit deal and scene.

Speaker 1 (01:01:04):
And scene, dylan and scene.
So what you have just witnessedthere, ladies and gentlemen,
was all tense purposes, a carcrash and, as I said, there was
the effort there.
Who knows where that was goingto go?
But I told you, dylan, this wasa true story based on a true
story, the origin story, as youmay or may not have guessed so
far, of Futio and his car maker,lamborghini, and enzo frari and

(01:01:32):
his black stallion ferrari.
And that is how the italian carmakers got started and that is
why they battled each other withthe kuntash and the f40 and the
enzo and the gallardo and theF40, and the Enzo and the
Gallardo and all of the cars ofthe above came from that soapbox
derby.
And, funny enough, celia didindeed marry Ferruccio at the

(01:01:58):
very beginning.
Lamborghini, and that is how itstarted and that is why we have
all the beautiful and wonderfulsuperc super italians today, uh,
today because, uh, because ofexactly that.
Uh, with absolutely yeah, withno lies.
Uh, it was all truthful andeverything that I said allegedly
happened.
Does that make sense?
Everything I said allegedly so,dylan, yeah, for next week.

(01:02:22):
What should we?
Where should our next threewords be?
If you cannot think ofsomewhere within the next three
seconds, I do have one in mymind.

Speaker 2 (01:02:34):
It's going to sound incredibly weird, but I thought
you know what the place whereyou think the strongest man
would come from, and I do notknow why.

Speaker 1 (01:02:46):
So somewhere where I would think the strongest man
would come from, and I do notknow why.
So somewhere where I wouldthink the strongest man would
come from, yeah, yeah, okay Idon't know that.

Speaker 2 (01:02:53):
That's the first thing that popped up again.
We can workshop that, but why I?

Speaker 1 (01:02:56):
I am curious to know what you're interesting window
into your psyche and I enjoyedit.
And I want to do that because Ihave no idea where to start
with that.
I have no idea.
Well, I'll tell you what we'regoing to do that because I have
no idea where to start with that.
I have nowhere to start.
Well, I'll tell you what we'regoing to do.
That one next, all right.
And then the week after thatone we're going to do somewhere
where you would build theultimate castle and you need to

(01:03:17):
design your castle as well.

Speaker 2 (01:03:19):
Oh, 100% like that's listen.
I know I keep kind of makingthe joke of the notes underneath
my bed, but castle-wise man, Ithink I got it.
You got that down.

Speaker 1 (01:03:31):
Yeah, and now it at least explains all the pictures
of Thor Bjornsson oiled up inEddie Hall and like the weird,
did you draw those?

Speaker 2 (01:03:39):
And they're like why are?

Speaker 1 (01:03:40):
they cut?
I've never seen them cut orlike that.

Speaker 2 (01:03:42):
I don't think they wrestled either.
Even drew it with my left hand.
I cuddled like that.

Speaker 1 (01:03:45):
I don't think they wrestled either even drew it
with my left hand, I could tellwhat were you doing with your
right hand.

Speaker 2 (01:03:48):
I walked into that and on that note.

Speaker 1 (01:03:56):
Thank you for listening to three word story
next week where we think thestrongest man in the world would
be from and why.
Double kill, double kill.
Strongest man in the worldwould be from and why.

Speaker 3 (01:04:07):
Double kill, double kill.
Drop it down low with ThreeWord Story.

Speaker 1 (01:04:19):
Thank you for listening to this week's Three
Word Story.
If you would like to get intouch with James and Dylan, then
please email us atthethreewordstory at gmailcom.
Send your reviews, negative orpositive, or even your three
words, and we'll read them outon air.
See you next week.