Your Sacred Non-Negotiables | The Essential Grace Series, Pt. 2

Text Michele

What if saying “yes” to everything is actually costing you what matters most? In today’s episode, we’re talking about sacred non-negotiables — those holy, grounding rhythms that anchor your soul when life tries to uproot you. From morning silence to family dinners, these aren’t just fun ideas. They are prophetic boundaries protecting the life you were made for. 

With Matthew 6:33 as our compass (“Seek first the kingdom…”), we’ll dismantle the belief that we can have competing priorities and reclaim the wisdom of guarding your heart like the life-giving well it’s meant to be. This isn’t about building walls — it’s about saying “yes” time and time again to what restores you and points you in the right direction. 

Ready to name what’s non-negotiable in your life? Let’s dive in! 

Today’s Reflection Questions: 

Think back to a time when life felt really grounded, spacious, Spirit-led. 

• What was present in that season? 
• Were there rhythms in your life that restored you? 
• Were there boundaries in place that helped you? 
• Was there an absence of distractions in that season? 

Here’s a link to Greg McKeown’s bestselling book, Essentialism.

Support the show

Welcome to Today’s Kus Word — where life coaching meets spiritual formation! Join musician, life coach, and spiritual formation prof Michele Kus, as she serves up short, powerful teachings, immersive meditations, bold declarations, and holy f(reedom)-bombs that are based solidly in scripture, grace theology, and positive psychology. Whether you’re seeking calm, clarity, courage, healing, deeper self-awareness, or just a fresh Kingdom perspective, throw on your headphones and tune into your next breakthrough. #TodaysKusWord

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All content © 2025 Michele Kus, M.A. All rights reserved.

Episode Transcript

Michele (00:00):
It's Wednesday, May 14th, and this is Today's Kus
Word.
Welcome to Today's Kus Wordwhere this week we are launching
into a fresh new series calledEssential Grace.
I'm going to be exploring somebig life coaching topics this
week, like uncovering yourvalues, clarifying your purpose,

(00:20):
designing an intentional life,juicy stuff like that.
I'm Michele Kus, your spiritualgrowth coach.
Let's get into it.
Happy Wednesday.
Hey, I want to give a shout outto LulaBanana12.
I have no idea who you are, butyou left me an amazing review
on Apple Podcasts.
It says Michele's teachings area lot like my favorite Uncle

(00:43):
Matt's orange juice.
Low key shout out to Uncle Matt.
They're biblical, they'rehumorous without being cutesy
clever, and they work.
Michele does a lot of research,it's true, I do.
It's a sickness.
I like how she gets things intochunk size bites.
I think on one episode wecalled those micro nuggets,
right?
I have been very muchchallenged by her concepts.

(01:05):
Taking a morning moment to gleanthings on this podcast is very
fruitful, very filling.
At times it's revolutionary,but it's never boring.
Hey, thanks, LulaBanana12.
We always try to keep it freshsqueezed and fresh and packed
with vitamins here on Today'sKus Word.

(01:26):
So thanks for that awesomereview! And if you want to leave
a rating or a review for theshow, it actually really helps
the podcast algorithm.
It pushes the show out to morepeople so more people can find
the show.
So you can go into ApplePodcasts, you can leave a rating
and or a review, or you can gointo Spotify and leave a rating.

(01:47):
Either way or both, it alwayshelps the show.
So thank you so much for that,and let's dive into today's
episode, which I am calling yourSacred Non-Negotiables.
So let's be honest.
Life is loud.
There's so many people,projects, problems vying for

(02:08):
your attention, right?
And it's easy to say yes to amillion things and suddenly your
calendar is packed out and youare stressed out.
So part of spiritual growth andspiritual maturity is not just
saying yes to all of the things,but it's actually thinking
about what you refuse to give up.

So here's Today's Kus Word (02:30):
I have permission to protect what
matters most.

One more time (02:37):
I have permission to protect what
matters most.
So on Monday we kicked off ourEssential Grace series talking
about what makes you come alive,and I hope you loved that
episode.
It was really fun to make itand I hope you had some time to

(02:59):
reflect on that super importantquestion and think about some of
the things that make you comealive, whether it's something
you're doing or a place that youare like in nature, or maybe
certain people that you're with.
It could be wide open.
So today we're continuing inour series talking about your
sacred non-negotiables.

(03:20):
These are your holy anchors inyour life that are not up for
debate.
These are your values, yourrelationships, your rhythms, all
of the things that your soulsays yes to over and over again.
Your sacred non-negotiables arenot just preferences.

(03:47):
They're actually kind ofprophetic in your life because
they point you to the kind oflife that you were created for
and designed for.
So you can think of them almostlike these holy tent pegs that
keep you firmly grounded whenthe whirlwind of the world tries
to uproot you and toss youaround in a million directions.

(04:10):
So in Matthew 6, verse 33, Jesussays this: Seek first the
kingdom of God and hisrighteousness, and all of these
things will be added to you.
And I know a lot of you lovethat verse.
Maybe it's even your life verseand this actually could be the

(04:33):
most countercultural verse inthe entire Bible.
I don't know, at leastcountercultural in terms of the
United States culture, where Iam.
We have a culture thatcelebrates busyness and
productivity, that is filledwith burnout and busyness.
So this Matthew 6.33 is notjust a cool memory verse.

(04:57):
It's actually kind of a holyrebellion and an epic strategy
for your freedom.
Because seeking first means youare not seeking everything,
right?
It means you are deciding.
You are intentionally,spiritually, unapologetically

(05:19):
deciding what actually mattersto you.
And a quick sidebar here, quickEnglish lesson.
The word decide comes from theLatin word, which literally
means to cut off.
So at its core, to decide meansto cut off all the other

(05:40):
options and to make a clear,committed choice that eliminates
the rest.
So if you have trouble decidingon something, it's because you
know deep down in your gut maybeyou don't want to cut off all
the other options that arepotentially available to you.

(06:00):
So when you decide your sacrednon-negotiables, you're not just
making a list, you're actuallycutting away all of the noise,
the excess fluff and stuff thatI mentioned on Monday that might
be distracting you from whatyou're here on the earth to do.

(06:21):
You're saying, hey, this is theway and that is not.
It is like a sacred act ofpruning in your life and Jesus
actually talks about this ideaof pruning in John 15, where the
Father prunes or cuts awaybranches that don't bear any

(06:44):
fruit, and it's so we can growmore freely and produce more
fruit.
So, deciding what matters mostto you is that kind of spiritual
pruning.
You are cooperating with theHoly Spirit in your life and
saying, hey, let's prune some ofthis stuff out that isn't

(07:07):
bearing any fruit.

So here's the deal (07:08):
Not everything can be a priority,
right?
Here is a fascinating littledetail and another sidebar
English lesson for you,especially as we get into
talking about clarity andalignment.

(07:28):
So originally that wordpriority when it entered the
English language in the 1400s,it was a strictly singular word.
Priority.
It meant the very first thing,the item that came before all

(07:51):
others in importance, right?
And we know this.
We know that's what prioritymeans.
So for hundreds of years no oneused the word priorities in the
plural because logically youcouldn't have more than one

(08:12):
first, right?
It wasn't until very recentlyin the 20th century, and kind of
with the rise of industrialismand this hustle culture that
we're all kind of steeped in now, at least here in the West, it
wasn't until just recently westarted bending that word to our

(08:36):
will, talking about prioritiesand trying to treat them all as
if they were all urgent or allof equal importance.
Okay, Michele, that's a reallyinteresting English lesson.
What's your point?
Well, when everything is apriority and you say I have

(08:56):
these priorities, ifeverything's a priority, nothing
really is a priority, right?
If you can't name what mattersmost to you, the world will
gladly do that for you.
So Greg McKeown wrote a bookcalled Essentialism, which I
highly recommend, and I will puta link to that book in the show

(09:19):
notes if you want to grab it.

He says this (09:21):
If you don't prioritize your life, someone
else will.
So let's pause for a second.
Let's get clear.
What are your non-negotiables?
What practices, what spaces,what rhythms, what people, what
are the things that ground youin God's presence and bring you

(09:45):
closer to your unique purpose?
Let me give you a few examples.
Maybe for you it's havingmorning silence.
Maybe it's having morningcoffee.
That could be one of yournon-negotiables and it's
perfectly valid.
Maybe it's daily moving yourbody in a way that feels good

(10:10):
for you, like taking a walk innature or taking a workout class
, or my friend Katie, who lovesto go to Spenga, which is just
an incredibly fun word to say.
Maybe it's having creativespace or margin, or just being
around people who see and knowand love the real you.

(10:32):
Maybe it's not allowingdistractions or notifications at
certain times during yourworkday.
Maybe it's having dinnertogether as a family a certain
number of nights a week, ormaybe it's always being ready
for bed by 9pm.

(10:54):
This is wide open.
It's not just about yourspiritual life or when you're
going to read the Bible or pray.
This has to do with yourrhythms when you're getting up,
when you're sleeping, whenyou're eating, when you're
interacting with your family,your friends.
All of those things affect yourlife.
So in Proverbs 4, verse 23, weread this: Above all else guard

(11:21):
your heart, for everything youdo flows from it.
So this is a great divinestrategy.
It tells us that your heart ismuch more than just your
emotions or, like the seat ofyour feelings.
Your heart is the source.

(11:41):
It's the spring where all ofyour words, your decisions, your
energy, your creativity, yourrelationships all flow from this
sacred source called your heart.
So what is guarding your heart?
Well, it's not about buildingwalls, right?

(12:02):
It's about having healthyboundaries and having sacred
non-negotiables.
It's about discerning what'sallowed to shape you and fill
you and influence you.
And I'll tell you, in my ownlife, there are certain things
and people who are allowed toshape me and influence me and

(12:26):
certain things and people whoaren't.
And that's where boundariescome in.
These aren't walls to keeppeople out.
We still love people, right?
So they're not walls, but they.
You can think of them like wellsto keep your own heart and soul
hydrated.
This isn't rejection, it's justprotection, right?

(12:50):
It's protection of your peace,protection of your heart.
If you think of your heart likea garden, it needs tending,
like the soil needs tending, theroots need watering and
protection, and weeds can comein, right?
Feelings of obligation,feelings of people pleasing,

(13:12):
overloading your calendar,comparing yourself to other
people.
These are weeds that we justneed to go in, recognize them
and then pull them out, withoutjudging ourselves, right?
Because we all do these things.
So just pull out the weeds.
And your boundaries are how youguard your heart, or your flow.

(13:33):
It's how you protect theconditions so that grace and
life and energy can grow.
You're creating this beautifulenvironment where you can
flourish, because everything youdo, every word you speak, every
yes you give, all of thosethings flow from the state of

(13:56):
your heart.
So we want to make sure thatyour heart is in a good place,
right?
So we guard it.
It's a holy act.
So, to finish up, just take adeep breath and breathe in grace
and breathe out clutter.

(14:31):
Take another deep breath andbreathe in clarity and breathe
out confusion and overwhelm.
And I believe that deep down,you already know what matters
most to you.
So let's just return to it.
Let's design a life where yourvalues get VIP access.

(14:55):
Your sacred non-negotiablesdeserve sacred space in your
life.
So think back to a time in yourlife when you felt really
grounded, when your life feltreally spacious and Spirit-led,

and ask yourself (15:16):
What was present in that season?
Were there rhythms in your lifethat restored you?
Were there boundaries in placethat helped you?

(15:36):
Was there an absence ofdistractions in that season?
Write down a few things thatpop to mind and name them,
because once you name them, youcan start actively protecting

(15:57):
those non-negotiables in yourlife.
And I'll put these reflectionquestions down in the show notes
as well, if you would like torefer back to them later or if
you just want to see themwritten out.
Let me pray for us.
God of clarity and kindness,thank you for whispering truth
into our chaos.
Thank you for the grace to namewhat matters and the courage to

(16:24):
release what doesn't.
Help us to guard our heartswith wisdom and to walk in
rhythms that restore our souls.
Teach us to honor the sacred inour days and teach us to seek

(16:45):
first your kingdom and to trustthat all else will fall into
place.
Help us to say no to lesserthings so that we can give our
best yes to what really matters.
In the beautiful name of Jesus.
Amen.

(17:05):
And that, my friend, is whatI've got for you today.
I hope you loved this secondepisode in our Essential Grace
teaching series and, if you did,make sure you share it with a
friend.
Don't keep all of this ooeygooey goodness to yourself.
Share the love! In the nextepisode of this teaching series,

(17:29):
I'm going to unpack how torecognize your true self and
what it means to live fully you.
You don't want to miss it!Until then, have an awesome day.