March 25, 2025 • 46 mins
Gambling, while often associated with big wins, comes with its fair share of regrets and realities. In this episode, we discuss our personal gambling experiences, the highs and lows at various casinos, strategies for slots and blackjack, and the captivating psychology behind why we keep playing, despite the odds.
• Exploring personal experiences at casinos
• Discussing strategies and secrets of slot machines
• Defining what it means to be a 'degenerate gambler'
• The psychology behind gambling and internal rules
• Sharing humorous and cautionary blackjack tales
• Notable takeaways on gambling and human experiences
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
thank you from the bottom of my heart for joining
(00:11):
us in another one of our topshelf stories.
Top Shelf Stories.
I'm your main host, tony.
These are my side hosts, jayand Chris, but once again, I'm
(00:33):
the main host.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Thank you, Tony, for having us here.
I appreciate it.
Yeah, tony, it's great to haveyou, no problem.
So, as you guys know, I'm Tony.
Speaker 1 (00:40):
Which one of you are Jay and which one are Chris?
Let me check my notes.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
The voice that sounds a little less normal is Jay.
Speaker 1 (00:51):
All right, and I'm Chris.
All right, nice to meet youguys.
Nice to meet you guys.
Speaker 3 (00:56):
Thanks for having us to your podcast so.
Speaker 1 (00:58):
Jay, I hear you want to come on my podcast and talk
about being a Holocaust denier.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
No, but I really wanted to do okay.
So when's the last guy, when'sthe last time you guys been to,
uh, pottawatomie, we're, uh,we're um so so this, this
podcast, is actually worldwide.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
Jay, I know this is your first time on a show.
Okay, it's hard for you tounderstand that.
Like you're using a very, verylocal reference, I think what
you meant to say was when wasthe last time you were at a
native american casino?
Speaker 2 (01:32):
there you go when's the last time you were at a
casino last week, a casino thatactually gives you money?
Speaker 3 (01:39):
it's been a while since I've been to the casino
probably over a year, okay sowhat's the reason why you don't
go to that often, Chris?
I gamble all my monies on shitcoins in the cryptocurrency
casinos that are on my phone.
Speaker 2 (01:57):
But then you're not an immediate gambler, basically.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
Oh no, you haven't been playing Solana.
Shit coins that can go fromzero to a hundred or a hundred
to zero in a nanosecond.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
That's true, but I was just recently at pot of
water.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
You can get a rush while you're taking a dump at
work with these things bro arewe talking about this one that
I've been hearing about so sofrequently?
Speaker 3 (02:21):
we're not going to talk about that.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
We're not talking about crypto Any particular
coins right now we're talkingabout casinos.
Casinos.
Okay, we're talking aboutcasinos, not pork.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
All right, so we're from the Pork Lower state of
Wisconsin.
We're from Milwaukee.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
I believe it's like almost the uppermost state.
Speaker 2 (02:42):
I'm saying lower part of the state Okay Of Wisconsin,
milwaukee, like almost theuppermost state.
I'm saying lower part of of thestate okay of wisconsin
milwaukee.
We live in a major metropolitanarea of milwaukee, wisconsin
yeah, so they have the possiblythe worst casino ever created by
I disagree, yeah, why?
Speaker 3 (02:59):
do you think it's bad ?
Speaker 2 (03:00):
okay.
So, uh, the last six times I'vebeen there, okay, I play fine.
Stop playing penny spinners.
I play slots.
That's fine, you know, I meanit's it's like the worst thing
to play.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
You lose the most well, that's for the word yeah,
that's for the.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
I am a novice.
That's for old biddies.
Hey, I do have three chips inmy hands that's, that's the old
blue hairs.
Speaker 1 (03:25):
They go in there and they put their $10 in Blue hairs
.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
Blue hairs, so like the old women that dye their
hair white but it turns out blue, mm-hmm.
Okay, I get it.
No, I lose a lot of money there, and I lost, I don't know, a
couple hundred last time I wasthere, which was this past
weekend.
Speaker 3 (03:45):
So hundred.
Last time I was there, whichwas this past weekend.
So what's your slot strategy?
You like bang it all into one?
Do you like to do like 10 spinsand then move, or do you have
like pure emotional?
I'm up, I'm down?
Speaker 1 (03:53):
well, chris j has a tried and true strategy.
I would almost call it a systemlisten, this is a system.
Speaker 2 (04:01):
Okay, I go in there there with as many 20s as it
possibly can get and I go toeach machine.
Speaker 3 (04:08):
So a small bill $20 bill.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
Throw it into the first one.
Usually I stick with thequarter machines or the ones
that don't have as much shit onit, like those machines that
have all those characters andall those.
Speaker 1 (04:21):
You do the three wheels.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
Yeah, I don't deal with the fucking, crazy, fucking
panda, bears and alligatorsthat come out at you I do you
want to feel like you're in acasino in the?
1920s, exactly the ones whereyou used to get the fucking uh
shit, they would.
It would come out at you andyou have a bucket of change
instead of having a ticket.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
They actually still have that in a couple of the
casinos in Las Vegas and it'sactually crazy, dude.
Them coins actually have asmell to them.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
Dude, there's nothing better than winning $100 in
coins and hearing them dent theshit out of the thing that holds
them.
Speaker 1 (04:59):
I need another bucket .
Speaker 2 (05:02):
That was the most like that was when I first
started.
First uh casino ever went to.
I won like I don't like 500bucks you were hooked coins.
It was like you, you, yeah, youjust had your first house
pallet jack.
Yes, so what I?
What my strategy always was andalways is, is $20 in a thing.
(05:25):
If I get above $20, if I atleast double it, I take that
slip out that you get, put it inmy back pocket and go to the
next machine with another $20.
And I keep doing that until Ibuild up enough of the slips to
get over what I came there with.
Speaker 3 (05:45):
So you don't want to put a slip back in the machine?
No, I never put a slip back inthe machine.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
Why?
Because that's my winnings, soI go up above 20.
Say, I put a 20 in the machineand then I hit like I don't know
, I win 40 bucks.
But other machines, the 20busts you just let it bust, then
I leave, then I go to anothermachine, so basically I won.
Okay, so maybe I won $100 onone with a $20.
So then I have $80 more where Icould lose $60 and still be
(06:14):
ahead because I still have that$20.
And basically the odds of melosing are less Huge.
Speaker 3 (06:22):
But what if you start 0 for $4 and you down 80 bucks
but usually a cool 80 gone?
Speaker 2 (06:28):
but for some reason I always find that one machine.
I just I put it in you alwaysplay the max.
Sounds like you've played everymachine there yeah, you always
play the max and, uh, if youdon't get it, if you don't get
it within 20, you're not gonnaget it.
You go to the next one.
Really, so usually I alwayscome out ahead.
But then when I go to thecasino with someone like my wife
or friend, I for some reason Ialways just feel like throwing
(06:51):
hundreds in and then I play thatmachine until my hundred is
gone.
Speaker 3 (06:55):
It's usually gone pretty quick.
You don't know how to walk awaywith a slip not in profit.
Yes, unless I'm by myself.
You can't go down a loser atthe machine.
Yeah, no, because I like toplay the slots too, but I like
the ones that have all thefucking wheels and fancy and
this and that and I jump fromone to the other.
Normally I do 10 spins eachmachine.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
I don't understand those.
If it doesn't hit 10, spins.
Speaker 3 (07:19):
I'm on to the next.
What is there to understand?
You just hit the fucking button.
Speaker 2 (07:23):
There's so many stupid things Like you could
have one bet that's $50.
You have no idea what you justbet and it's like gone like that
.
Speaker 3 (07:30):
Why are you?
Speaker 2 (07:30):
betting 50 bucks.
No, I'm saying you go to apenny machine and for some
reason, you hit the max bet of200 lines and fucking this and
that, and then all of a suddenit's a $50 bet $73 in pennies,
yeah, I'm like I've done that.
I'm like what the fuck?
I only get two fucking rollsoff 100?
.
What happened?
It was a penny machine.
That's bullshit.
Penny machines are full of shit.
Speaker 1 (07:51):
I hate them.
They're a scam.
They're made to trick oldpeople.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
I don't know man, but you can gamble with one penny,
but you're never going to winanything.
Speaker 3 (08:04):
You can't.
And you can sit there all daylong drinking free soda.
You can't.
You can spend one line, you canspend one line 100%.
Speaker 2 (08:08):
You cannot.
I don't think you can spend onepenny, but you can spend one
line.
Speaker 1 (08:11):
The lowest amount you can bet is 75 cents.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
Is this 75 cents.
Speaker 3 (08:16):
Are you sure?
I don't believe you.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
He might be right.
I was just there.
I don't believe you.
So Chris you, I don't believeyou.
So, chris, you like those crazypenny machines With all the
fucking weird shit on it.
Speaker 3 (08:28):
I take.
My strategy is to go with asmuch Cash as I can get a hands
on, get on down there and I'llspin a machine.
I'll pick a row and normally Ilike to start with the pennies,
maybe nickels.
Depends how many shekels I canmanage to get down there.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
What do you mean?
A row?
Speaker 3 (08:47):
Like a row, like there's 15 machines in a row.
Speaker 1 (08:51):
He doesn't like to spread himself around.
Speaker 3 (08:53):
All these machines are right here.
I'll go and I'll put my $100bill in and I'll spin every line
for one cent.
So it'll be like Tony says,like 75 cents or a dollar and a
quarter spin or something orwhatever.
Two bucks a spin.
Tap that shit 10 times.
Then I'll take my ticket outand move to the next one.
Tap that shit 10 times.
(09:14):
Move to the next.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Tap that shit 10 times Tap that shit 10 times.
That's a strategy, but I'llwalk for 15 minutes before I sit
down and put another 20 in.
I don't play around Sometimes.
Speaker 3 (09:25):
Then I'll go A lot of times.
I like to go to the videoroulette machines.
Yeah, so it's just you and theroulette table, with a bunch of
other people playing too.
But they're all on theirmachine and you can throw.
I think the lowest you can gois 50 cents 50 cents on the
table, Maybe a dollar.
You got to go like a dollar onthe inside dollar on the outside
.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
I don't know how to play Ouellette.
Speaker 3 (09:46):
I know the answer to this, but you can just play like
you can hedge your bet, so youcould like put $5 on red and $5
on some random numbers on theinside and then, if one of your
random numbers on the insidehits, boom back to the machines.
10 smaps on that, 10 smaps onthat.
Sometimes I like to play poker,video poker that's Tony's game,
(10:08):
but that also does require youto like.
All right, I'm going to sithere for a minute, I'm going to
chill out, I'm going to justplay this hands.
You got to play like 100 handsto make sense, in my opinion.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
So does anybody know?
And then I do blackjack.
Speaker 3 (10:22):
The textbook definition of degenerate yeah,
well, we have these devices hereright at the table in the
podcasting, without looking at aphone.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
Let me just give you my okay dictionary uh
equivalents.
It's what did you say?
Again, what was the worddegenerate?
Degenerate can you put it in asentence?
Someone that takes your moneywithout uh doing something else
in exchange for I doubt that'swebster's official uh, basically
(10:56):
sucking a dick without askingfor money I don't think that's
it yeah that's probably wrong.
Speaker 3 (11:02):
I just scrolled a bit and I did not see anything like
that on the definitions here,but I will tell you that the
first thing that popped up fromOxford Languages is degenerate,
having lost the physical, mentalor moral qualities considered
normal and desirable, showingevidence of decline are we
(11:27):
talking about your dad now, orsomething, tony?
Speaker 2 (11:28):
no, that's how I gamble, you gamble like a
degenerate.
Speaker 1 (11:32):
I've been told I'm a degenerate.
Speaker 3 (11:34):
I don't know what that means lacking some property
or order or distinctness whyare?
You not wearing structurepreviously or usually present.
Speaker 1 (11:44):
See this tattoo I got about 18 years ago, ridiculous.
It's a video poker machine.
That's what I love.
Speaker 2 (11:52):
He's rubbing his thigh right now.
I got a lucky horseshoe.
Speaker 1 (11:55):
Weird moans and I got a welcome to Milwaukee in the
same style as the welcome to LasVegas sign.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
Do you see that you got on your leg, which actually
was a good choice.
Not many people can see it.
Speaker 1 (12:09):
I fucking love to gamble.
Speaker 3 (12:13):
So what does it mean to be a degenerate gambler?
Speaker 2 (12:17):
Tony will tell you he is one.
Speaker 3 (12:19):
A degenerate gambler is another word for a compulsive
gambler or a gambling addict.
You could bet on anything.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
I'll take that bet.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Yeah, I like those odds.
I'll give you 10 to 1.
Speaker 3 (12:36):
You're in the final stage of the gambling addiction
curve.
Speaker 2 (12:41):
Yeah, I'm not betting today.
I'll give you 10 to 1 odds, soI can go.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
I can go for years without gambling.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
I have but then when you get the taste of the tit, um
I.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
I set rules for myself because my addictive
personality in regards togambling.
I will not go to an atm in agambling establishment.
I will not go out to my car toget more money.
Speaker 3 (13:14):
If I have more money in my car, um, I will I will
borrow from people you'll bringpower from people rules are
meant to be, hit me with ahundred, your power from people
um yeah, I forgot to tell thepart of my story where I go back
to my wife who's playingblackjack and take all of her
profit chips out of her pocketand go catch them in for more
(13:35):
slaps on the machine but uh,yeah, I do video poker or um, I
should just stick to regularpoker, like in-person poker,
because I do such a timecommitment I
do much, much, much better atthat yeah, but you're there for
like eight straight hours.
(13:56):
Dude, that's the best dude tonydid uh, drinking little tiny
things of orange soda from themachines at the casino tony did
one of those tournaments Pokertournaments.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
I've done lots of tournaments.
Speaker 2 (14:08):
Anyway, okay, he describes one of them because he
says I told him we weregambling the day before and
Tony's like I'm coming heretomorrow to do a poker
tournament, like yeah, I'll comecheck you out.
This is when I was drinking alittle bit, so you know I fib a
little.
So he, this is when I wasdrinking a little bit, so you
know I, you know I fib a little.
(14:28):
So he's like jay, I was, I waslooking at the door.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
I was waiting for him to come.
He never came, just like my dadreminiscence of my father.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
Anyway, uh, that was the funny part that he said,
watching the window, what I wasgonna say.
Speaker 1 (14:39):
Though you were like there for like 12 fucking hours
playing poker and that was justlike if you get to the next
round, and if I would have gotfurther, I would have been there
even longer insane.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Yeah, so when you do this, like you're in a set of
what five people run a it'sbasically what?
Okay, what is it is what it'son, like it's on tv, basically
you're around and then you're.
If you're the last person onthat table, you move on, or no,
no, uh.
Speaker 1 (15:07):
So in most tournament play um there there's
incremented times and and breaksand a lot of times they'll,
they'll, they'll hand you umcards, like at different
different levels of thetournament.
Like you'll get to level 10 andthen they'll go to every player
(15:31):
.
They'll just grab a stack ofcards and they'll, they'll hand
them out to everybody and it'llsay like table three, seat four,
and you got to get up and moveto a different table.
So you don't play.
You usually don't like wipe outone whole table and then move
to another table.
They won't let the action.
How do they configure that?
Speaker 3 (15:53):
It's tricky.
Well, they want to keep likefive to nine people at each
table.
Yeah, they don't want a lot ofheads up until the end.
Speaker 1 (16:01):
Yeah, they won't let any table get below like four
people.
Speaker 3 (16:03):
They want every pot to contain like four or five
people's aunties.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
That's when they start breaking the tables up.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
Yeah, so if I'm at, you know, like when I went and
played World Series of Poker,there was, fuck dude, there had
to be 40 or 50 tables.
Yeah, set up in a conferenceroom at pot of wannabe um, what
does it get?
Speaker 2 (16:30):
what is it to get involved in that?
How much do you have to pay?
Speaker 1 (16:34):
uh, I I've done a couple of them.
I think I've done them for like250 and I think I've done them
for like 400 so if you don't getto the top, whatever you don't,
you lose everything yeah, well,yeah they, they pay off to like
20th place and there's how manypeople and I think how many
people usually an average fiveone thousand five hundred the
(16:56):
cheaper ones there there'sprobably almost a thousand, but
the more expensive ones will belike 400, 400 people or so okay
and a lot of them right.
Speaker 3 (17:10):
There's satellite tournaments where, like, the top
20 or whatever are invited toplay in the main tournament as
well as you win money, or thetop one or the whatever right so
, yeah, the the more expensivesatellite I played, uh, they
paid.
Speaker 1 (17:25):
They paid out to like 10th place and second place got
like the most amount of moneyand first place got a free
ticket into the next tournament.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
I'd rather have this.
I'd rather be second place.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
Well not really because you know they pay you
out, like whatever, 800 bucks orwhatever it is.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Oh, that was it.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
No, it was much more than that, but they pay you out
$5,000.
But the next tournament you getto go into is, you know, an
$8,000 buy-in.
Speaker 2 (18:04):
Yeah, but if you're not top 20, you lose it no
matter what, you lose itregardless.
I guess.
Yeah, yeah, it's calledgambling.
Yeah, but are you a chip, uh,player?
Are you a chip, uh, fondler?
Yes, so you fondle the shit outof your chips?
Yeah, I do.
Are you good at too like?
Can you flip them almost like?
Speaker 1 (18:27):
like shuffle a stack yeah, stack of decks or uh cards
or cards.
I mean, I don't sit there anddo that obsessively, but I have
to have one or two of them in myhand.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
Why is that?
I don't know You're doing it.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
Like exactly what you're doing in your hand.
Speaker 3 (18:39):
You've been doing it for the last two hours.
Speaker 1 (18:41):
I sit and do that.
I like it though.
Speaker 2 (18:53):
I tonight, I can't stop.
You know what it is.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
It's the way you, uh, you think it's the easier way
for you to think likeconcentrate but but like I don't
go in there with them fuckingridiculous sunglasses and a hat
and put my hood off.
That was the next question.
Speaker 2 (19:03):
Like act like a fucking complete idiot so you
have no glasses, no hat no,you're.
When you make a bet, no hat, no, when you make a bet.
Let me ask you this when youmake a bet and maybe it's a big
bet, you've done a big betbefore do you look down, do you
look up?
Do you look at the person thatyou're betting against?
What do you do with your eyes?
What do you do with your body?
Speaker 1 (19:22):
I don't know.
Maybe that's kind of why Imight be better at it than a lot
of people, because I don't, Idon't really oh, believe you
have towels, I'm sure yeah, I'msure I, but I don't really care,
like if I got a hand that Iknow is very good, like I'm not
(19:46):
excited or nervous yeah, you,you, you have blank face for
everything in your life actually.
It's hard to tell if you'rehappy or sad sometimes and most
of the time, like when I go playpoker, which I did last week,
and last time I played pokerbefore, that was like a month
(20:06):
before that, and then the timebefore that was a year ago.
And I go back to Vegas in likea month before that and then the
time before that was a year ago, um, and I go back to vegas in
like a month and a half and I'llprobably play poker for like
four straight days, jesus christit's insanity and it seems so
boring.
Speaker 2 (20:24):
My uh father-in-law lives with me.
He's obsessed with it.
He watches the tv programs, heplays it on his phone, yeah, and
it's like so fucking boring.
It's the boring shit it's.
Speaker 1 (20:36):
I'd rather watch golf or what else is a terrible
sport baseball when there's likenothing going on, but most of
the time I just have myheadphones in and I'm not even
fucking paying attention to likeanything that people are like
talking to each other.
Speaker 3 (20:56):
You're supposed to read people, though that was
always my weakness, I felt likein poker, was I wanted to be a
part of every hand.
The ability to wait for yourhand was something I always
struggled with, so I wouldalways like oh, it's eight bucks
, I'll just put a little bit inhere.
I might phase them on this one.
I'll try to bluff and then you,just you, don't wait for your
hand.
You know, because we used toplay a lot of poker back in the
(21:19):
day, but that was like kids withnothing else to do, like 25, 20
to 25 years old or whatever.
We were just hanging outdrinking beer, playing ogre the
house.
Speaker 2 (21:26):
Did you actually play for some good money or just fun
?
Speaker 3 (21:29):
no, like quarters ten dollar buy-in or something you
know that's, that's ridiculousit was fun.
Speaker 2 (21:34):
I thought you were better.
I thought you're a gambler noyeah, I don't, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (21:39):
I've spent a lot of my a lot of my time playing
cards and I fucking love it weshould have.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
We should play cards, we should play cards like at
the casino or in person.
In person, because I'd beatyour fucking ass.
We'd need a group.
So what happened, jay?
Speaker 3 (21:57):
with your trip to the casino.
I think that's where thisstarted.
Right Was your trip to thecasino.
Speaker 1 (22:03):
I can finish it for him.
He came home, broke His wifewas pissed at him.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
No, actually a little bit.
You're halfway there, she bet abunch.
So we're at her works party.
I got $100 in singles.
It was a work party, the guy'srich giving out free money to
everybody.
There you pick an envelope andin every envelope there's a cash
(22:31):
prize.
My dumb ass.
And she should have said don'tgrab the fat thick one, she's
the one who packed them all,don't grab she's the one Jay's
grabbing.
Speaker 1 (22:42):
She's like what a fucking idiot.
Speaker 3 (22:45):
She probably did tell him like six times too.
Speaker 2 (22:47):
No, I picked it up.
I picked that bitch up.
Grab number 26J.
Okay, I picked that bitch up.
I'm like why is no one pickingthe thick, fat one?
Everyone looks up in the airand doesn't look at me.
I'm like, fine, fuck you, I'mpicking it, I take it out.
It's $100 in singles.
Speaker 1 (23:12):
Everyone else is getting $200, 400, I get a
hundred.
What the fuck am I fine,whatever, that's not too bad.
Speaker 2 (23:15):
You're not even supposed to be there, you know
how long it took me to put thosesingles in the fucking slot
machines.
On one slot machine I put a.
I put like 30 dollars in.
It took me like a minute and ahalf.
Sounds like a better use ofyour time than just losing it.
Speaker 3 (23:32):
Right?
Were you pressing the gamblebutton while you were continuing
to feed them in?
Because that's what I probablywould have been like.
Speaker 1 (23:39):
I don't got time for this shit.
Speaker 3 (23:40):
I would have got to the 10 and be like all right,
I'm going to start hitting themachine and then I would still
feed them in while slapping that10 down.
Speaker 2 (23:46):
So I had $ dollars in my pocket, I had that hundred
dollars.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
I lost both of those within 10 minutes and then I
went to the atm, which tony's uhdisagrees that's my rule, and
it sucks too when you lose yourmoney real quick, yeah, and like
I'm there with my wife andshe's like I'll just run to the
atm and I'm like, no, reallyyour wife instigates it.
Speaker 2 (24:06):
Yeah, like I cannot, my wife tells me not to go there
I cannot break my fucking rules.
Speaker 1 (24:10):
So I go to the atm see my wife.
My wife lets me go out and dothings though, so it's different
.
Speaker 3 (24:16):
See, I got a soft.
Not go to the atm machine rule,but it always happens and when
I go to the machine.
Speaker 1 (24:22):
It's more of a don't go to the atm suggestion well,
because it's a soft rule.
Speaker 3 (24:27):
Then when I get to the machine I'm like well, the
fee is going to be high, so Ishould take out the maximum
amount you know to justify thecost come back again and pay
another five, six dollars, I'lljust put this other 200 in my
back pocket and not use it thatnever works.
It's.
It's totally different.
It's depend because you knowyou either spend every dime you
(24:50):
have and go home pissed off,yeah, or like playing rap music
the whole way, or whatever, likeyou're just angry but not so I
deserved that.
You say to yourself or you youlike, fucking hit it real big,
and then you waste half of thatstill, and then go yeah, because
you think you're gonna win bigagain, right?
Speaker 2 (25:06):
so basically I took out 500 more dollars.
I mean that's not a shit ton.
I mean it doesn't deserve alaugh like that.
Speaker 1 (25:16):
It was pretty sinister well, considering
you're 200 in a hole and you'relike I love what's gonna help me
get out of this jam, maybe 500500 more.
Speaker 2 (25:28):
I love how the ATMs at casinos they send you, how
they send out the money.
They give you $400 in $100bills and then they give the
rest in 20s.
Yeah, Like they don't want togive you anything, Okay, anyway.
So I went to the first machinewith the 100, and I don't like
(25:48):
putting in the hundreds and Ididn't feel like changing it for
20, so I said fuck it, I justwe'll ride.
You're like too much time.
Speaker 1 (25:55):
I got 500 bucks to blow through yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
So the first machine, I think I lost most of it and
I'm like, fuck it, let's justride it.
I was losing it, just keepriding the 100.
And I think I was on the firstone for like 20 minutes and then
it was gone.
So the next one yeah, I lost itagain.
Next one lost it again.
So I'm down 300 more dollars.
And then I'm like, let's go tothe bar, I need a drink.
(26:19):
Got a drink, went to the nextmachine.
I went up like $300 on a quarterwhat you want to say is I went
up to only two hundred dollarsdown yes, exactly, okay, I went
up on my hundred dollars,whatever to your example and
then, uh, I lost all thatbecause I kept playing that same
(26:41):
exact machine, because Ithought I would get a jackpot
you're like it's hot yeah it'shot yeah it's hot and this old
lady next was like keep going,keep going, you got something
going.
I'm like it's so strange howyou're lady next to me was like
keep going, keep going, you gotsomething going.
Speaker 3 (26:51):
I'm like what the fuck you want, lady, it's so
strange how you're sitting atthis machine.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
They always talk to you.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
Paying half your rent into the crazy colors and the
lady next to you is like go on,little sonny.
Speaker 2 (27:00):
Keep on going and you're like making friends with
this lady Dude.
The women, the old women, talkto you.
It doesn't matter if you don'tlook at them, it doesn't matter
if you don't respond to them,they'll keep talking.
Speaker 3 (27:09):
They're trying to space out their spending.
Is that what it is?
Speaker 1 (27:13):
Yeah, because, like the yeah they're like a 105
oxygen machine, pissed offbecause you can't smoke in there
anymore.
Speaker 3 (27:20):
Can you not smoke in the whole casino anymore, right,
anywhere.
Speaker 1 (27:23):
There's.
Speaker 3 (27:23):
Designating spots Is there slot machines and poker
tables there.
Speaker 2 (27:27):
Actually, there's a whole floor.
There's a whole floor there'snot blackjack.
Speaker 3 (27:31):
No, because I can't play blackjack without smoking.
Speaker 2 (27:33):
There's a whole floor upstairs for smoking.
You can smoke, yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:37):
It might be blackjack up there.
Speaker 2 (27:38):
Do you go out there, or you?
Get immediately busy.
Oh yeah, dude.
Speaker 3 (27:42):
Oh my God, See, I used to love just sitting
Because I didn't really smoke.
I haven't smoked for years, butI would always get a pack when
we'd go to the casino and you'dsit and play blackjack and smoke
cigarettes.
You guys are flipping yourcoins and tickets.
Speaker 2 (27:54):
No, dude, I did the same thing.
I loved smoking at the casinos,and so I'm down to, I think, my
last $100.
Oof $100 bill.
After what?
Speaker 3 (28:09):
$600.
$600.
Speaker 2 (28:10):
$600, dude bill, after what?
600?
And I'm at this one and there'sa guy next to me and he's
getting all the extra shit.
Speaker 1 (28:18):
you know the so maybe the machine right next to him
is going to do the same and Iput my money in there.
Speaker 2 (28:26):
So mine finally hit and then it was like a $300
payout.
I took that out and I was like,nah, maybe I should just leave.
I'm only like I'm down, likeyou're only down.
400 60 60 or 70 percent of whatI came with.
But fuck it, I'm gonna gosomewhere else.
And then I put it in anothermachine, the whole 340, I get
(28:51):
down to a hundred, and you knowyou always kind of do it at an
even number where you shouldstop.
And then I went below a hundredand I was like oh my god, I'm
gonna lose fucking everything.
And traces my wife's like she'sstop, just stop.
Speaker 1 (29:07):
We have to leave with something like shut up, bitch,
just let me finish, and am I toassume that at this point in the
night she hasn't even gambled adollar?
Speaker 2 (29:18):
yet she gambled 30 bucks.
She's like she was.
Speaker 3 (29:21):
Like I'm done, she's down there she was done within
20 minutes of being, and I canget with that.
Speaker 1 (29:27):
You're like where's the rest of your bonus, bitch
she?
Saved it where's your I?
Speaker 2 (29:32):
should have done the same thing.
So I'm down, uh, I'm down 100and I keep going down.
You get that gut feeling likejust just fucking leave, just
you know.
You get that the terriblefeeling like you're almost out.
There's got to be something.
Does something happen?
Speaker 1 (29:48):
please.
Speaker 2 (29:49):
I'm the only one in this casino who lost tonight so
I'm below 90 and she keepsyelling get out, get out, get
out.
I'm like what the fuck's 90dollars gonna do?
90 dollars is not gonna help my700 loss.
So I kept going, kept goingdown.
I think I was at like almost 60and then all of a sudden, just
(30:10):
boom, it just hit and I got like400 bucks and then I finally
just said fuck this, I'm done,I'll take that.
I think it was just under 500,so I lost 200, some dollars.
Speaker 3 (30:21):
So I'm like fuck it, I'm done, now I'm not gonna no,
do you ever try to play slots inthe high roller machine?
Speaker 2 (30:27):
uh, high roller room I saw those rooms, never went in
them though yeah, so try to goin there what's like a hundred
dollar roll I think the cheapestone was 25 dollars.
Speaker 3 (30:34):
Okay, that's I've done that before, not, so you
just gotta go in with thecommitment right off the bat
that that's 700 that you lost isalready gone.
Like just throw it in themachine and start spinning and
you will be like down like two300 bucks, but then you'll hit a
win and on the machine it ain'tshit but it's like a $400 win
(30:56):
and you're you know, that's whyI like that.
The thrill of the-.
Speaker 2 (31:00):
You go to those?
Oh, yeah, you go to those.
With how much money, though?
Speaker 3 (31:03):
Like I said, you gotta go If you're going into
the casino with like 500 bucks,that you're like I'm going to
play with 500 bucks, yeah.
Speaker 1 (31:11):
And I only got 10 minutes.
Speaker 3 (31:12):
Well, and you just are like I'm going to fucking
risk it.
No biscuit, oh, risk it, justgo for it.
The high roller room, because abig win in the high roller room
is insane.
It's like fucking insane.
All right, you win $ thirtythousand dollars on a machine,
right, yeah, but a small win islike still like a couple
(31:33):
thousand.
If you put the, if you hit, ifyou just think in your head that
any of these machines that Iplay are gonna pay me out five
times what I put in it.
One out of ten times, like youknow, like the odds are still
against you, but you justunderstand the odds and you
realize I'm to play this gameanyways.
I'm going to go into the bigroller room and only hit five
(31:55):
times and just see what happens,but you'll lose $300 in eight
minutes.
And you have to walk out withyour tailbone in your legs out
of money.
Speaker 2 (32:04):
So are they confusing machines?
Speaker 3 (32:06):
No, they have a lot of your simple machines because
you're putting $5 on each line,not a penny.
So you do a five by five, deal$5, five lines, three row, ding,
ding, ding, ding ding.
You know.
Speaker 2 (32:19):
Those are the ones I like.
I don't like those confusingones.
Speaker 1 (32:22):
So I was playing video poker at our local Native
American casino and I'm watching.
There.
There's this old guy and he'sin the the bank of machines that
are max bet of three and eachcredit is a hundred dollars, so
(32:46):
he's betting $300 a spin on allthree.
Right, so he, he's playing thatmachine and he wins like 20
grand, okay but he might havealready spun through yeah, yeah,
yeah, grand so that really, itreally isn't like that big of a
deal, right you're?
you're betting 300 every spin,20 grand.
(33:08):
I mean it's a lot of fuckingmoney, right, but that's only
like it's 12x or something likethat not even so, but anytime,
anytime you win in the highroller room like you're not
cashing out for a little money,so most of the time when you win
it's a hand pay, so he'swaiting for the lady to pay him,
(33:29):
yeah, and he jumps on themachine next to him he just
whips out a new billfold with anew set of 300, he's fucking,
he's fucking cranking hundredsin there.
He put like two, three thousanddollars in fucking first spin.
He wins a hundred and fiftythousand dollars and you know,
(33:55):
then they come over and they'relike, oh my god, great win, you
know.
And uh, they start paying himout on the first win and now
they got to go start a new thing.
So he jumps on the next machineand he puts another fucking
several thousand dollars and andhe lost that.
But I'm like this guy is fuckedup.
Speaker 3 (34:16):
Dude, yeah, I was in Vegas and I was at Caesars and I
was just sitting at a machinejust like wasting time just
sitting there, you know, likesipping my drink chilling.
Speaker 2 (34:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (34:29):
And I was watching this woman and, yeah, she went
through like $10,000 in a matterof seconds, damn, $10,000 in a
matter of seconds, damn and justwhipped out her card, swiped it
again, loaded the machine with20 grand, blasted near through
almost all of it and took offLike it was nothing.
Yeah, like probably lost like$16,000.
Speaker 2 (34:47):
You gotta think of it 12 minutes.
You gotta think of it indifferent increments, like
someone that has a lot of money.
Increments like ours is like 20.
Like, say, you lose 200 bucks,you're like, fuck, I lost 200
bucks, right, her 200 hours is20 000.
Sick, it's sick.
It's like just the way it isfor rich fucking people.
Speaker 1 (35:07):
I mean I so, because I know so, my, my rules that I
have put in play for myself forgambling.
They're very specific and Iknow if I start breaking them
I'm just going to go fuckingnuts, I'm going to be fucking
going down there every fuckingminute.
Speaker 2 (35:29):
So why do they call you always a degenerate gambler,
degenerate, degenerate gambler?
It's just a phrase.
I know, I don't know.
He's not a degenerate gambler,degenerate, degenerate gambler,
just a phrase.
Speaker 1 (35:37):
I know, I don't know he's not a degenerate gambler.
Speaker 3 (35:42):
He's got a car, he's got a house.
Doesn't that fuck with you?
Speaker 2 (35:44):
Don't those words just kind of fuck with?
Speaker 3 (35:46):
you Degenerate, did you got a gambler.
Speaker 2 (35:49):
Go ahead, Tony, but uh.
You're a but when I go to mylocal Native American casino,
Would you just?
Call it home, you're mocking menow.
Speaker 1 (36:02):
Are you a fucker?
I have a $200 maximum.
Oh, that ain't worth fuckingdriving down there.
Speaker 2 (36:09):
Yeah, dude, that's not even worth it.
Speaker 1 (36:11):
I will not go in there with a fucking penny more,
unless I'm specifically goingto play poker.
Speaker 3 (36:19):
Yeah, you're not a degenerate dude.
Speaker 2 (36:21):
No, I'm not Dude.
You have to have at leastalmost a thousand to actually
get action going.
Speaker 1 (36:27):
If I fucking set that standard for myself, I will be
justifying it every fucking week.
Yeah, I don't go that.
Speaker 2 (36:35):
So you go that often then I don't go very much.
Speaker 3 (36:38):
500 bucks is what I bring.
Speaker 1 (36:41):
So it usually depends on, like, maybe once or twice a
year, me and Michelle go downtogether, so you you just get
these and I'll just decide likeI'll get off work early and I'll
be downtown and I'll be like,well, I'm spending the rest of
my day at Pottle.
Speaker 3 (37:00):
When I was a traveling salesman, I absolutely
stopped at a lot of casinos andwhen I was doing that I was a
hundred bucks.
I would just go in with ahundred bucks, slap it through
the machine.
I would never stay for morethan a half an hour.
Speaker 1 (37:13):
Let me ask you this Honestly I would never stay for
more than a half an hour.
Speaker 3 (37:15):
Let me ask you this Honestly I would do like that.
I'd use the points to get themeal, or whatever.
Speaker 2 (37:18):
Let me ask you this You've done that many times.
Have you ever had a situationwhere you were like, oh my God,
I want tons of money?
Speaker 3 (37:24):
Like hundreds, not tons, because, like I said so,
then really gambling is for justfun.
Speaker 2 (37:29):
Quit looking at my hand.
I'm trying to figure out.
Put mine when your hand isfucking all calloused and false
standing next to mine.
Speaker 3 (37:35):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (37:36):
Yeah, I don't know, I'm not so yeah, so I I gotta
realize that pottawatomie isoverall a shit casino.
It is when it comes to anythingthat plugs in.
That's true.
Table games are the table games, dude, I know.
But but I I also found out thattheir card shufflers that they
(38:00):
use now, um, can actually sortthe deck completely.
What does that mean?
They can put it one throughking or ace through king of
hearts, but I thought, when theyit can sort them out to factory
so the actual shufflingmachines can read the cards and
(38:26):
put them in certain orders.
Speaker 2 (38:28):
So I thought they have like seven decks they use
for like they do.
Speaker 1 (38:35):
But they know that they can assume that the table's
full and put it on a mix thatyour average blackjack table is
whatever five spots.
So if the table's full, there'ssix sequences of cards going
(38:56):
out you're telling me I can't,so they can make every six hands
be a.
Speaker 3 (39:04):
They really can't, but they could probably get
pretty damn close because theycan do it.
Like you're saying, themachines are connected to
computers that can shuffle adeck however it wants to shuffle
it, but people are going todraw, pick and and hit and stand
on different shit, right fivesand sixes, or 16s and 15s but
I'm saying, I'm saying it's,it's another way that you know
the saying the deck stackedagainst you, like that's why I
(39:28):
gotta play the wheel fortune.
You know what's the what?
The wheel of fortune machinewhere it's the man that spins
the fucking wheel yeah, so now?
Speaker 1 (39:35):
so now, if I'm playing cards, like if I'm
playing poker, that's different,because the casino doesn't have
a stake in it.
Well, they just want you tokeep playing.
They have a rake, which is muchdifferent, yep.
They just want the volume, butif I'm going to sit at a table
playing against the casino forsomething, it's only gonna be
(39:58):
hand shuffled.
And what games are those?
Speaker 2 (40:01):
though blackjack pitch mainly okay.
So I played blackjack when Iwas just there.
Really strange thing happened.
I don't know I I've only playedblackjack twice in my life
based in the casino, um and thenI got two eights.
I didn't know, like I know thatyou can take, like split them
and split.
I'm like I didn't know what theword was or what to say.
(40:23):
I'm like can I can take thesecards apart and, uh, gamble on
both of them?
She's like split them, likeyeah, bitch, yeah, so
everybody's gonna startsomewhere, bro.
She split them, okay, and thenI hit on the eight.
Obviously.
Speaker 3 (40:37):
Or no, no, no, no, you got another eight they throw
me two more.
Speaker 2 (40:40):
They throw me two more, one more card in each one.
And then I got like I don'tknow, 14.
And I hit on that one and Ibusted.
And then I on the other one, Igot another fucking eight.
It, it's just like do you wantto split again?
(41:03):
I'm like bitch, you alreadytook 50 dollars from me.
No, that's not.
But again, that's not odd, thathappens almost every time.
And I said, no, I'm gonna stay.
Speaker 1 (41:07):
And then she obviously got like an 18, I
think.
Yeah, I stayed at 16.
It happens I've done it whenI'm playing blackjack pitch.
That's usually single or doubledeck and it moves fucking fast,
would you hit it?
16?
Speaker 2 (41:20):
it depends on what the dealer had you can see what
the dealer has, what their carddeck off is.
Speaker 3 (41:26):
I didn't even look at what the fuck it was.
Speaker 2 (41:29):
I think it was a face card.
So a face card, yeah prettysure it was a face card.
Speaker 1 (41:33):
So on a face card.
Speaker 2 (41:35):
she can only hit so many times and then she'll bust.
So on a face card she's morelikely to bust.
Speaker 1 (41:39):
Is that what it is On a face card?
No, on a face card, you'repretty much assuming that she
has 20.
That the other one's going tobe a face card, because there's
the most face cards in the deck.
But no, there is, there's moreface cards than anything One
through ten and then Jack.
Speaker 2 (41:58):
Queen, King.
Speaker 1 (41:59):
How is there more face cards?
Speaker 3 (42:00):
So if there's seven decks, Just do one deck, dude,
don't start with seven, yeah, doone deck.
Speaker 2 (42:07):
There's not more face cards there, absolutely is.
Speaker 3 (42:10):
How?
Because there's only four aces,or aces don't go, there's only
four twos.
Yeah, it's not only four aces,or the aces don't go.
There's only four, two, there'sonly four, threes, there's only
four fours, yada, yada, yada,but there's five sets of tens,
so there's 25 sets of kings kingis a 10.
There's four of those, and thenthe eight, the queen is a 10
(42:30):
there's 16 tens in the deck myfault.
Speaker 2 (42:32):
Okay, in that instance.
Speaker 1 (42:34):
Yes, you're right, so I was saying so, you always
assume that the card that'sfacing down is another 10 got
you.
So she's showing a 10 and Ihave a pair of eights.
Yeah, I personally am notsplitting them because I gotta
assume at best'm going to havetwo 18s against her 20.
Speaker 2 (42:53):
You don't want to lose more.
Speaker 1 (42:55):
So at 16, I'm better off just taking a hit and more
than likely busting and justlosing one money.
Speaker 3 (43:04):
I'm a stander on 16.
I did stand at 16.
Speaker 1 (43:06):
I lost.
But if she has and I know I'mgender labeling my dealer right
now but if she is showing a five, if she is showing a five, if
she is showing a five and I got,I got a 16 I'm probably hitting
that because you are probablystaying on it I'm probably
(43:29):
staying on 16 because I got toassume that she has a 10 under,
so she's gonna have 15 and thenshe's gonna pull another 10.
So I mean you just got to playthe odds like I would never
split eights against the 10 well, thank you very much.
Speaker 2 (43:46):
I did, yeah, and that's fine.
I didn't know what the fuck todo.
I knew that I was like hey, Igot two of the same I could do
something extra.
Speaker 1 (43:53):
I'm also like.
Michelle plays blackjack withme when we go to the casino and
she's always nervous becauseshe's worried about everybody
getting pissed oh, because youtake their car.
Speaker 2 (44:04):
Yeah, yeah, and she's been yelled at, and all this
other shit, who cares?
Speaker 1 (44:08):
yeah fuck them.
I don't fuck off, I don't everfucking care when somebody is
playing what I would consider tobe stupid, because I can't
believe your wife would be, andreally in the end we're both
probably going to lose, yeah, sowhat the fuck does it matter?
I can't believe your wife wouldbe that would think like that.
Speaker 2 (44:27):
I think she would be like fuck you, I don't give a
fuck.
She fought off a guy here witha knife.
Remember that story?
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (44:38):
And she's afraid of a card.
Oh, she doesn't want to be inthat awkward thing of her making
a bad decision and some fuckingbusinessman from toledo ohio,
like the fucking bitch, doesn'teven know how to play this game
well, so as far as casinos go,what do we know about casinos?
Speaker 2 (44:55):
the?
Speaker 1 (44:55):
ones ones in Vegas are typically better.
The ones on stolen NativeAmerican land are usually
fucking terrible, because reallyit's just a different form of
reparations.
Speaker 2 (45:07):
Okay, I agree with that, because I really have
never really won, you know.
Speaker 1 (45:12):
Native Americans own the casinos, but you rarely see
native americans gambling ever,ever, I've never even seen one
working there.
Speaker 2 (45:24):
So, uh, as far as casinos go, they're fun, but
they're just for fun, right guys?
Speaker 1 (45:29):
yep, never make money , you know just you know, I see
them as a business opportunity.
Speaker 2 (45:35):
But you do you, then why come you haven't turned into
?
Speaker 3 (45:37):
a business, yet motherfucker entertainment
purposes only.
All right, chris.
No, shut her down.
Jay, leave me out.
Speaker 2 (45:44):
Shut her down okay, I basically just did so.
Speaker 1 (45:48):
Remember, casinos suck, I don't know what else to
do, chris, I'm lost well, youcan definitely edit this out.
thank you from the bottom of my heart for joining
(00:11):
us in another one of our topshelf stories.
Top Shelf Stories.
I'm your main host, tony.
These are my side hosts, jayand Chris, but once again, I'm
(00:33):
the main host.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Thank you, Tony, for having us here.
I appreciate it.
Yeah, tony, it's great to haveyou, no problem.
So, as you guys know, I'm Tony.
Speaker 1 (00:40):
Which one of you are Jay and which one are Chris?
Let me check my notes.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
The voice that sounds a little less normal is Jay.
Speaker 1 (00:51):
All right, and I'm Chris.
All right, nice to meet youguys.
Nice to meet you guys.
Speaker 3 (00:56):
Thanks for having us to your podcast so.
Speaker 1 (00:58):
Jay, I hear you want to come on my podcast and talk
about being a Holocaust denier.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
No, but I really wanted to do okay.
So when's the last guy, when'sthe last time you guys been to,
uh, pottawatomie, we're, uh,we're um so so this, this
podcast, is actually worldwide.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
Jay, I know this is your first time on a show.
Okay, it's hard for you tounderstand that.
Like you're using a very, verylocal reference, I think what
you meant to say was when wasthe last time you were at a
native american casino?
Speaker 2 (01:32):
there you go when's the last time you were at a
casino last week, a casino thatactually gives you money?
Speaker 3 (01:39):
it's been a while since I've been to the casino
probably over a year, okay sowhat's the reason why you don't
go to that often, Chris?
I gamble all my monies on shitcoins in the cryptocurrency
casinos that are on my phone.
Speaker 2 (01:57):
But then you're not an immediate gambler, basically.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
Oh no, you haven't been playing Solana.
Shit coins that can go fromzero to a hundred or a hundred
to zero in a nanosecond.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
That's true, but I was just recently at pot of
water.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
You can get a rush while you're taking a dump at
work with these things bro arewe talking about this one that
I've been hearing about so sofrequently?
Speaker 3 (02:21):
we're not going to talk about that.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
We're not talking about crypto Any particular
coins right now we're talkingabout casinos.
Casinos.
Okay, we're talking aboutcasinos, not pork.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
All right, so we're from the Pork Lower state of
Wisconsin.
We're from Milwaukee.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
I believe it's like almost the uppermost state.
Speaker 2 (02:42):
I'm saying lower part of the state Okay Of Wisconsin,
milwaukee, like almost theuppermost state.
I'm saying lower part of of thestate okay of wisconsin
milwaukee.
We live in a major metropolitanarea of milwaukee, wisconsin
yeah, so they have the possiblythe worst casino ever created by
I disagree, yeah, why?
Speaker 3 (02:59):
do you think it's bad ?
Speaker 2 (03:00):
okay.
So, uh, the last six times I'vebeen there, okay, I play fine.
Stop playing penny spinners.
I play slots.
That's fine, you know, I meanit's it's like the worst thing
to play.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
You lose the most well, that's for the word yeah,
that's for the.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
I am a novice.
That's for old biddies.
Hey, I do have three chips inmy hands that's, that's the old
blue hairs.
Speaker 1 (03:25):
They go in there and they put their $10 in Blue hairs
.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
Blue hairs, so like the old women that dye their
hair white but it turns out blue, mm-hmm.
Okay, I get it.
No, I lose a lot of money there, and I lost, I don't know, a
couple hundred last time I wasthere, which was this past
weekend.
Speaker 3 (03:45):
So hundred.
Last time I was there, whichwas this past weekend.
So what's your slot strategy?
You like bang it all into one?
Do you like to do like 10 spinsand then move, or do you have
like pure emotional?
I'm up, I'm down?
Speaker 1 (03:53):
well, chris j has a tried and true strategy.
I would almost call it a systemlisten, this is a system.
Speaker 2 (04:01):
Okay, I go in there there with as many 20s as it
possibly can get and I go toeach machine.
Speaker 3 (04:08):
So a small bill $20 bill.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
Throw it into the first one.
Usually I stick with thequarter machines or the ones
that don't have as much shit onit, like those machines that
have all those characters andall those.
Speaker 1 (04:21):
You do the three wheels.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
Yeah, I don't deal with the fucking, crazy, fucking
panda, bears and alligatorsthat come out at you I do you
want to feel like you're in acasino in the?
1920s, exactly the ones whereyou used to get the fucking uh
shit, they would.
It would come out at you andyou have a bucket of change
instead of having a ticket.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
They actually still have that in a couple of the
casinos in Las Vegas and it'sactually crazy, dude.
Them coins actually have asmell to them.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
Dude, there's nothing better than winning $100 in
coins and hearing them dent theshit out of the thing that holds
them.
Speaker 1 (04:59):
I need another bucket .
Speaker 2 (05:02):
That was the most like that was when I first
started.
First uh casino ever went to.
I won like I don't like 500bucks you were hooked coins.
It was like you, you, yeah, youjust had your first house
pallet jack.
Yes, so what I?
What my strategy always was andalways is, is $20 in a thing.
(05:25):
If I get above $20, if I atleast double it, I take that
slip out that you get, put it inmy back pocket and go to the
next machine with another $20.
And I keep doing that until Ibuild up enough of the slips to
get over what I came there with.
Speaker 3 (05:45):
So you don't want to put a slip back in the machine?
No, I never put a slip back inthe machine.
Speaker 2 (05:49):
Why?
Because that's my winnings, soI go up above 20.
Say, I put a 20 in the machineand then I hit like I don't know
, I win 40 bucks.
But other machines, the 20busts you just let it bust, then
I leave, then I go to anothermachine, so basically I won.
Okay, so maybe I won $100 onone with a $20.
So then I have $80 more where Icould lose $60 and still be
(06:14):
ahead because I still have that$20.
And basically the odds of melosing are less Huge.
Speaker 3 (06:22):
But what if you start 0 for $4 and you down 80 bucks
but usually a cool 80 gone?
Speaker 2 (06:28):
but for some reason I always find that one machine.
I just I put it in you alwaysplay the max.
Sounds like you've played everymachine there yeah, you always
play the max and, uh, if youdon't get it, if you don't get
it within 20, you're not gonnaget it.
You go to the next one.
Really, so usually I alwayscome out ahead.
But then when I go to thecasino with someone like my wife
or friend, I for some reason Ialways just feel like throwing
(06:51):
hundreds in and then I play thatmachine until my hundred is
gone.
Speaker 3 (06:55):
It's usually gone pretty quick.
You don't know how to walk awaywith a slip not in profit.
Yes, unless I'm by myself.
You can't go down a loser atthe machine.
Yeah, no, because I like toplay the slots too, but I like
the ones that have all thefucking wheels and fancy and
this and that and I jump fromone to the other.
Normally I do 10 spins eachmachine.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
I don't understand those.
If it doesn't hit 10, spins.
Speaker 3 (07:19):
I'm on to the next.
What is there to understand?
You just hit the fucking button.
Speaker 2 (07:23):
There's so many stupid things Like you could
have one bet that's $50.
You have no idea what you justbet and it's like gone like that
.
Speaker 3 (07:30):
Why are you?
Speaker 2 (07:30):
betting 50 bucks.
No, I'm saying you go to apenny machine and for some
reason, you hit the max bet of200 lines and fucking this and
that, and then all of a suddenit's a $50 bet $73 in pennies,
yeah, I'm like I've done that.
I'm like what the fuck?
I only get two fucking rollsoff 100?
.
What happened?
It was a penny machine.
That's bullshit.
Penny machines are full of shit.
Speaker 1 (07:51):
I hate them.
They're a scam.
They're made to trick oldpeople.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
I don't know man, but you can gamble with one penny,
but you're never going to winanything.
Speaker 3 (08:04):
You can't.
And you can sit there all daylong drinking free soda.
You can't.
You can spend one line, you canspend one line 100%.
Speaker 2 (08:08):
You cannot.
I don't think you can spend onepenny, but you can spend one
line.
Speaker 1 (08:11):
The lowest amount you can bet is 75 cents.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
Is this 75 cents.
Speaker 3 (08:16):
Are you sure?
I don't believe you.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
He might be right.
I was just there.
I don't believe you.
So Chris you, I don't believeyou.
So, chris, you like those crazypenny machines With all the
fucking weird shit on it.
Speaker 3 (08:28):
I take.
My strategy is to go with asmuch Cash as I can get a hands
on, get on down there and I'llspin a machine.
I'll pick a row and normally Ilike to start with the pennies,
maybe nickels.
Depends how many shekels I canmanage to get down there.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
What do you mean?
A row?
Speaker 3 (08:47):
Like a row, like there's 15 machines in a row.
Speaker 1 (08:51):
He doesn't like to spread himself around.
Speaker 3 (08:53):
All these machines are right here.
I'll go and I'll put my $100bill in and I'll spin every line
for one cent.
So it'll be like Tony says,like 75 cents or a dollar and a
quarter spin or something orwhatever.
Two bucks a spin.
Tap that shit 10 times.
Then I'll take my ticket outand move to the next one.
Tap that shit 10 times.
(09:14):
Move to the next.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Tap that shit 10 times Tap that shit 10 times.
That's a strategy, but I'llwalk for 15 minutes before I sit
down and put another 20 in.
I don't play around Sometimes.
Speaker 3 (09:25):
Then I'll go A lot of times.
I like to go to the videoroulette machines.
Yeah, so it's just you and theroulette table, with a bunch of
other people playing too.
But they're all on theirmachine and you can throw.
I think the lowest you can gois 50 cents 50 cents on the
table, Maybe a dollar.
You got to go like a dollar onthe inside dollar on the outside
.
Speaker 2 (09:44):
I don't know how to play Ouellette.
Speaker 3 (09:46):
I know the answer to this, but you can just play like
you can hedge your bet, so youcould like put $5 on red and $5
on some random numbers on theinside and then, if one of your
random numbers on the insidehits, boom back to the machines.
10 smaps on that, 10 smaps onthat.
Sometimes I like to play poker,video poker that's Tony's game,
(10:08):
but that also does require youto like.
All right, I'm going to sithere for a minute, I'm going to
chill out, I'm going to justplay this hands.
You got to play like 100 handsto make sense, in my opinion.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
So does anybody know?
And then I do blackjack.
Speaker 3 (10:22):
The textbook definition of degenerate yeah,
well, we have these devices hereright at the table in the
podcasting, without looking at aphone.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
Let me just give you my okay dictionary uh
equivalents.
It's what did you say?
Again, what was the worddegenerate?
Degenerate can you put it in asentence?
Someone that takes your moneywithout uh doing something else
in exchange for I doubt that'swebster's official uh, basically
(10:56):
sucking a dick without askingfor money I don't think that's
it yeah that's probably wrong.
Speaker 3 (11:02):
I just scrolled a bit and I did not see anything like
that on the definitions here,but I will tell you that the
first thing that popped up fromOxford Languages is degenerate,
having lost the physical, mentalor moral qualities considered
normal and desirable, showingevidence of decline are we
(11:27):
talking about your dad now, orsomething, tony?
Speaker 2 (11:28):
no, that's how I gamble, you gamble like a
degenerate.
Speaker 1 (11:32):
I've been told I'm a degenerate.
Speaker 3 (11:34):
I don't know what that means lacking some property
or order or distinctness whyare?
You not wearing structurepreviously or usually present.
Speaker 1 (11:44):
See this tattoo I got about 18 years ago, ridiculous.
It's a video poker machine.
That's what I love.
Speaker 2 (11:52):
He's rubbing his thigh right now.
I got a lucky horseshoe.
Speaker 1 (11:55):
Weird moans and I got a welcome to Milwaukee in the
same style as the welcome to LasVegas sign.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
Do you see that you got on your leg, which actually
was a good choice.
Not many people can see it.
Speaker 1 (12:09):
I fucking love to gamble.
Speaker 3 (12:13):
So what does it mean to be a degenerate gambler?
Speaker 2 (12:17):
Tony will tell you he is one.
Speaker 3 (12:19):
A degenerate gambler is another word for a compulsive
gambler or a gambling addict.
You could bet on anything.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
I'll take that bet.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Yeah, I like those odds.
I'll give you 10 to 1.
Speaker 3 (12:36):
You're in the final stage of the gambling addiction
curve.
Speaker 2 (12:41):
Yeah, I'm not betting today.
I'll give you 10 to 1 odds, soI can go.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
I can go for years without gambling.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
I have but then when you get the taste of the tit, um
I.
Speaker 1 (12:57):
I set rules for myself because my addictive
personality in regards togambling.
I will not go to an atm in agambling establishment.
I will not go out to my car toget more money.
Speaker 3 (13:14):
If I have more money in my car, um, I will I will
borrow from people you'll bringpower from people rules are
meant to be, hit me with ahundred, your power from people
um yeah, I forgot to tell thepart of my story where I go back
to my wife who's playingblackjack and take all of her
profit chips out of her pocketand go catch them in for more
(13:35):
slaps on the machine but uh,yeah, I do video poker or um, I
should just stick to regularpoker, like in-person poker,
because I do such a timecommitment I
do much, much, much better atthat yeah, but you're there for
like eight straight hours.
(13:56):
Dude, that's the best dude tonydid uh, drinking little tiny
things of orange soda from themachines at the casino tony did
one of those tournaments Pokertournaments.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
I've done lots of tournaments.
Speaker 2 (14:08):
Anyway, okay, he describes one of them because he
says I told him we weregambling the day before and
Tony's like I'm coming heretomorrow to do a poker
tournament, like yeah, I'll comecheck you out.
This is when I was drinking alittle bit, so you know I fib a
little.
So he, this is when I wasdrinking a little bit, so you
know I, you know I fib a little.
(14:28):
So he's like jay, I was, I waslooking at the door.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
I was waiting for him to come.
He never came, just like my dadreminiscence of my father.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
Anyway, uh, that was the funny part that he said,
watching the window, what I wasgonna say.
Speaker 1 (14:39):
Though you were like there for like 12 fucking hours
playing poker and that was justlike if you get to the next
round, and if I would have gotfurther, I would have been there
even longer insane.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Yeah, so when you do this, like you're in a set of
what five people run a it'sbasically what?
Okay, what is it is what it'son, like it's on tv, basically
you're around and then you're.
If you're the last person onthat table, you move on, or no,
no, uh.
Speaker 1 (15:07):
So in most tournament play um there there's
incremented times and and breaksand a lot of times they'll,
they'll, they'll hand you umcards, like at different
different levels of thetournament.
Like you'll get to level 10 andthen they'll go to every player
(15:31):
.
They'll just grab a stack ofcards and they'll, they'll hand
them out to everybody and it'llsay like table three, seat four,
and you got to get up and moveto a different table.
So you don't play.
You usually don't like wipe outone whole table and then move
to another table.
They won't let the action.
How do they configure that?
Speaker 3 (15:53):
It's tricky.
Well, they want to keep likefive to nine people at each
table.
Yeah, they don't want a lot ofheads up until the end.
Speaker 1 (16:01):
Yeah, they won't let any table get below like four
people.
Speaker 3 (16:03):
They want every pot to contain like four or five
people's aunties.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
That's when they start breaking the tables up.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
Yeah, so if I'm at, you know, like when I went and
played World Series of Poker,there was, fuck dude, there had
to be 40 or 50 tables.
Yeah, set up in a conferenceroom at pot of wannabe um, what
does it get?
Speaker 2 (16:30):
what is it to get involved in that?
How much do you have to pay?
Speaker 1 (16:34):
uh, I I've done a couple of them.
I think I've done them for like250 and I think I've done them
for like 400 so if you don't getto the top, whatever you don't,
you lose everything yeah, well,yeah they, they pay off to like
20th place and there's how manypeople and I think how many
people usually an average fiveone thousand five hundred the
(16:56):
cheaper ones there there'sprobably almost a thousand, but
the more expensive ones will belike 400, 400 people or so okay
and a lot of them right.
Speaker 3 (17:10):
There's satellite tournaments where, like, the top
20 or whatever are invited toplay in the main tournament as
well as you win money, or thetop one or the whatever right so
, yeah, the the more expensivesatellite I played, uh, they
paid.
Speaker 1 (17:25):
They paid out to like 10th place and second place got
like the most amount of moneyand first place got a free
ticket into the next tournament.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
I'd rather have this.
I'd rather be second place.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
Well not really because you know they pay you
out, like whatever, 800 bucks orwhatever it is.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
Oh, that was it.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
No, it was much more than that, but they pay you out
$5,000.
But the next tournament you getto go into is, you know, an
$8,000 buy-in.
Speaker 2 (18:04):
Yeah, but if you're not top 20, you lose it no
matter what, you lose itregardless.
I guess.
Yeah, yeah, it's calledgambling.
Yeah, but are you a chip, uh,player?
Are you a chip, uh, fondler?
Yes, so you fondle the shit outof your chips?
Yeah, I do.
Are you good at too like?
Can you flip them almost like?
Speaker 1 (18:27):
like shuffle a stack yeah, stack of decks or uh cards
or cards.
I mean, I don't sit there anddo that obsessively, but I have
to have one or two of them in myhand.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
Why is that?
I don't know You're doing it.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
Like exactly what you're doing in your hand.
Speaker 3 (18:39):
You've been doing it for the last two hours.
Speaker 1 (18:41):
I sit and do that.
I like it though.
Speaker 2 (18:53):
I tonight, I can't stop.
You know what it is.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
It's the way you, uh, you think it's the easier way
for you to think likeconcentrate but but like I don't
go in there with them fuckingridiculous sunglasses and a hat
and put my hood off.
That was the next question.
Speaker 2 (19:03):
Like act like a fucking complete idiot so you
have no glasses, no hat no,you're.
When you make a bet, no hat, no, when you make a bet.
Let me ask you this when youmake a bet and maybe it's a big
bet, you've done a big betbefore do you look down, do you
look up?
Do you look at the person thatyou're betting against?
What do you do with your eyes?
What do you do with your body?
Speaker 1 (19:22):
I don't know.
Maybe that's kind of why Imight be better at it than a lot
of people, because I don't, Idon't really oh, believe you
have towels, I'm sure yeah, I'msure I, but I don't really care,
like if I got a hand that Iknow is very good, like I'm not
(19:46):
excited or nervous yeah, you,you, you have blank face for
everything in your life actually.
It's hard to tell if you'rehappy or sad sometimes and most
of the time, like when I go playpoker, which I did last week,
and last time I played pokerbefore, that was like a month
(20:06):
before that, and then the timebefore that was a year ago.
And I go back to Vegas in likea month before that and then the
time before that was a year ago, um, and I go back to vegas in
like a month and a half and I'llprobably play poker for like
four straight days, jesus christit's insanity and it seems so
boring.
Speaker 2 (20:24):
My uh father-in-law lives with me.
He's obsessed with it.
He watches the tv programs, heplays it on his phone, yeah, and
it's like so fucking boring.
It's the boring shit it's.
Speaker 1 (20:36):
I'd rather watch golf or what else is a terrible
sport baseball when there's likenothing going on, but most of
the time I just have myheadphones in and I'm not even
fucking paying attention to likeanything that people are like
talking to each other.
Speaker 3 (20:56):
You're supposed to read people, though that was
always my weakness, I felt likein poker, was I wanted to be a
part of every hand.
The ability to wait for yourhand was something I always
struggled with, so I wouldalways like oh, it's eight bucks
, I'll just put a little bit inhere.
I might phase them on this one.
I'll try to bluff and then you,just you, don't wait for your
hand.
You know, because we used toplay a lot of poker back in the
(21:19):
day, but that was like kids withnothing else to do, like 25, 20
to 25 years old or whatever.
We were just hanging outdrinking beer, playing ogre the
house.
Speaker 2 (21:26):
Did you actually play for some good money or just fun
?
Speaker 3 (21:29):
no, like quarters ten dollar buy-in or something you
know that's, that's ridiculousit was fun.
Speaker 2 (21:34):
I thought you were better.
I thought you're a gambler noyeah, I don't, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (21:39):
I've spent a lot of my a lot of my time playing
cards and I fucking love it weshould have.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
We should play cards, we should play cards like at
the casino or in person.
In person, because I'd beatyour fucking ass.
We'd need a group.
So what happened, jay?
Speaker 3 (21:57):
with your trip to the casino.
I think that's where thisstarted.
Right Was your trip to thecasino.
Speaker 1 (22:03):
I can finish it for him.
He came home, broke His wifewas pissed at him.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
No, actually a little bit.
You're halfway there, she bet abunch.
So we're at her works party.
I got $100 in singles.
It was a work party, the guy'srich giving out free money to
everybody.
There you pick an envelope andin every envelope there's a cash
(22:31):
prize.
My dumb ass.
And she should have said don'tgrab the fat thick one, she's
the one who packed them all,don't grab she's the one Jay's
grabbing.
Speaker 1 (22:42):
She's like what a fucking idiot.
Speaker 3 (22:45):
She probably did tell him like six times too.
Speaker 2 (22:47):
No, I picked it up.
I picked that bitch up.
Grab number 26J.
Okay, I picked that bitch up.
I'm like why is no one pickingthe thick, fat one?
Everyone looks up in the airand doesn't look at me.
I'm like, fine, fuck you, I'mpicking it, I take it out.
It's $100 in singles.
Speaker 1 (23:12):
Everyone else is getting $200, 400, I get a
hundred.
What the fuck am I fine,whatever, that's not too bad.
Speaker 2 (23:15):
You're not even supposed to be there, you know
how long it took me to put thosesingles in the fucking slot
machines.
On one slot machine I put a.
I put like 30 dollars in.
It took me like a minute and ahalf.
Sounds like a better use ofyour time than just losing it.
Speaker 3 (23:32):
Right?
Were you pressing the gamblebutton while you were continuing
to feed them in?
Because that's what I probablywould have been like.
Speaker 1 (23:39):
I don't got time for this shit.
Speaker 3 (23:40):
I would have got to the 10 and be like all right,
I'm going to start hitting themachine and then I would still
feed them in while slapping that10 down.
Speaker 2 (23:46):
So I had $ dollars in my pocket, I had that hundred
dollars.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
I lost both of those within 10 minutes and then I
went to the atm, which tony's uhdisagrees that's my rule, and
it sucks too when you lose yourmoney real quick, yeah, and like
I'm there with my wife andshe's like I'll just run to the
atm and I'm like, no, reallyyour wife instigates it.
Speaker 2 (24:06):
Yeah, like I cannot, my wife tells me not to go there
I cannot break my fucking rules.
Speaker 1 (24:10):
So I go to the atm see my wife.
My wife lets me go out and dothings though, so it's different
.
Speaker 3 (24:16):
See, I got a soft.
Not go to the atm machine rule,but it always happens and when
I go to the machine.
Speaker 1 (24:22):
It's more of a don't go to the atm suggestion well,
because it's a soft rule.
Speaker 3 (24:27):
Then when I get to the machine I'm like well, the
fee is going to be high, so Ishould take out the maximum
amount you know to justify thecost come back again and pay
another five, six dollars, I'lljust put this other 200 in my
back pocket and not use it thatnever works.
It's.
It's totally different.
It's depend because you knowyou either spend every dime you
(24:50):
have and go home pissed off,yeah, or like playing rap music
the whole way, or whatever, likeyou're just angry but not so I
deserved that.
You say to yourself or you youlike, fucking hit it real big,
and then you waste half of thatstill, and then go yeah, because
you think you're gonna win bigagain, right?
Speaker 2 (25:06):
so basically I took out 500 more dollars.
I mean that's not a shit ton.
I mean it doesn't deserve alaugh like that.
Speaker 1 (25:16):
It was pretty sinister well, considering
you're 200 in a hole and you'relike I love what's gonna help me
get out of this jam, maybe 500500 more.
Speaker 2 (25:28):
I love how the ATMs at casinos they send you, how
they send out the money.
They give you $400 in $100bills and then they give the
rest in 20s.
Yeah, Like they don't want togive you anything, Okay, anyway.
So I went to the first machinewith the 100, and I don't like
(25:48):
putting in the hundreds and Ididn't feel like changing it for
20, so I said fuck it, I justwe'll ride.
You're like too much time.
Speaker 1 (25:55):
I got 500 bucks to blow through yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:57):
So the first machine, I think I lost most of it and
I'm like, fuck it, let's justride it.
I was losing it, just keepriding the 100.
And I think I was on the firstone for like 20 minutes and then
it was gone.
So the next one yeah, I lost itagain.
Next one lost it again.
So I'm down 300 more dollars.
And then I'm like, let's go tothe bar, I need a drink.
(26:19):
Got a drink, went to the nextmachine.
I went up like $300 on a quarterwhat you want to say is I went
up to only two hundred dollarsdown yes, exactly, okay, I went
up on my hundred dollars,whatever to your example and
then, uh, I lost all thatbecause I kept playing that same
(26:41):
exact machine, because Ithought I would get a jackpot
you're like it's hot yeah it'shot yeah it's hot and this old
lady next was like keep going,keep going, you got something
going.
I'm like it's so strange howyou're lady next to me was like
keep going, keep going, you gotsomething going.
Speaker 3 (26:51):
I'm like what the fuck you want, lady, it's so
strange how you're sitting atthis machine.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
They always talk to you.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
Paying half your rent into the crazy colors and the
lady next to you is like go on,little sonny.
Speaker 2 (27:00):
Keep on going and you're like making friends with
this lady Dude.
The women, the old women, talkto you.
It doesn't matter if you don'tlook at them, it doesn't matter
if you don't respond to them,they'll keep talking.
Speaker 3 (27:09):
They're trying to space out their spending.
Is that what it is?
Speaker 1 (27:13):
Yeah, because, like the yeah they're like a 105
oxygen machine, pissed offbecause you can't smoke in there
anymore.
Speaker 3 (27:20):
Can you not smoke in the whole casino anymore, right,
anywhere.
Speaker 1 (27:23):
There's.
Speaker 3 (27:23):
Designating spots Is there slot machines and poker
tables there.
Speaker 2 (27:27):
Actually, there's a whole floor.
There's a whole floor there'snot blackjack.
Speaker 3 (27:31):
No, because I can't play blackjack without smoking.
Speaker 2 (27:33):
There's a whole floor upstairs for smoking.
You can smoke, yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:37):
It might be blackjack up there.
Speaker 2 (27:38):
Do you go out there, or you?
Get immediately busy.
Oh yeah, dude.
Speaker 3 (27:42):
Oh my God, See, I used to love just sitting
Because I didn't really smoke.
I haven't smoked for years, butI would always get a pack when
we'd go to the casino and you'dsit and play blackjack and smoke
cigarettes.
You guys are flipping yourcoins and tickets.
Speaker 2 (27:54):
No, dude, I did the same thing.
I loved smoking at the casinos,and so I'm down to, I think, my
last $100.
Oof $100 bill.
After what?
Speaker 3 (28:09):
$600.
$600.
Speaker 2 (28:10):
$600, dude bill, after what?
600?
And I'm at this one and there'sa guy next to me and he's
getting all the extra shit.
Speaker 1 (28:18):
you know the so maybe the machine right next to him
is going to do the same and Iput my money in there.
Speaker 2 (28:26):
So mine finally hit and then it was like a $300
payout.
I took that out and I was like,nah, maybe I should just leave.
I'm only like I'm down, likeyou're only down.
400 60 60 or 70 percent of whatI came with.
But fuck it, I'm gonna gosomewhere else.
And then I put it in anothermachine, the whole 340, I get
(28:51):
down to a hundred, and you knowyou always kind of do it at an
even number where you shouldstop.
And then I went below a hundredand I was like oh my god, I'm
gonna lose fucking everything.
And traces my wife's like she'sstop, just stop.
Speaker 1 (29:07):
We have to leave with something like shut up, bitch,
just let me finish, and am I toassume that at this point in the
night she hasn't even gambled adollar?
Speaker 2 (29:18):
yet she gambled 30 bucks.
She's like she was.
Speaker 3 (29:21):
Like I'm done, she's down there she was done within
20 minutes of being, and I canget with that.
Speaker 1 (29:27):
You're like where's the rest of your bonus, bitch
she?
Saved it where's your I?
Speaker 2 (29:32):
should have done the same thing.
So I'm down, uh, I'm down 100and I keep going down.
You get that gut feeling likejust just fucking leave, just
you know.
You get that the terriblefeeling like you're almost out.
There's got to be something.
Does something happen?
Speaker 1 (29:48):
please.
Speaker 2 (29:49):
I'm the only one in this casino who lost tonight so
I'm below 90 and she keepsyelling get out, get out, get
out.
I'm like what the fuck's 90dollars gonna do?
90 dollars is not gonna help my700 loss.
So I kept going, kept goingdown.
I think I was at like almost 60and then all of a sudden, just
(30:10):
boom, it just hit and I got like400 bucks and then I finally
just said fuck this, I'm done,I'll take that.
I think it was just under 500,so I lost 200, some dollars.
Speaker 3 (30:21):
So I'm like fuck it, I'm done, now I'm not gonna no,
do you ever try to play slots inthe high roller machine?
Speaker 2 (30:27):
uh, high roller room I saw those rooms, never went in
them though yeah, so try to goin there what's like a hundred
dollar roll I think the cheapestone was 25 dollars.
Speaker 3 (30:34):
Okay, that's I've done that before, not, so you
just gotta go in with thecommitment right off the bat
that that's 700 that you lost isalready gone.
Like just throw it in themachine and start spinning and
you will be like down like two300 bucks, but then you'll hit a
win and on the machine it ain'tshit but it's like a $400 win
(30:56):
and you're you know, that's whyI like that.
The thrill of the-.
Speaker 2 (31:00):
You go to those?
Oh, yeah, you go to those.
With how much money, though?
Speaker 3 (31:03):
Like I said, you gotta go If you're going into
the casino with like 500 bucks,that you're like I'm going to
play with 500 bucks, yeah.
Speaker 1 (31:11):
And I only got 10 minutes.
Speaker 3 (31:12):
Well, and you just are like I'm going to fucking
risk it.
No biscuit, oh, risk it, justgo for it.
The high roller room, because abig win in the high roller room
is insane.
It's like fucking insane.
All right, you win $ thirtythousand dollars on a machine,
right, yeah, but a small win islike still like a couple
(31:33):
thousand.
If you put the, if you hit, ifyou just think in your head that
any of these machines that Iplay are gonna pay me out five
times what I put in it.
One out of ten times, like youknow, like the odds are still
against you, but you justunderstand the odds and you
realize I'm to play this gameanyways.
I'm going to go into the bigroller room and only hit five
(31:55):
times and just see what happens,but you'll lose $300 in eight
minutes.
And you have to walk out withyour tailbone in your legs out
of money.
Speaker 2 (32:04):
So are they confusing machines?
Speaker 3 (32:06):
No, they have a lot of your simple machines because
you're putting $5 on each line,not a penny.
So you do a five by five, deal$5, five lines, three row, ding,
ding, ding, ding ding.
You know.
Speaker 2 (32:19):
Those are the ones I like.
I don't like those confusingones.
Speaker 1 (32:22):
So I was playing video poker at our local Native
American casino and I'm watching.
There.
There's this old guy and he'sin the the bank of machines that
are max bet of three and eachcredit is a hundred dollars, so
(32:46):
he's betting $300 a spin on allthree.
Right, so he, he's playing thatmachine and he wins like 20
grand, okay but he might havealready spun through yeah, yeah,
yeah, grand so that really, itreally isn't like that big of a
deal, right you're?
you're betting 300 every spin,20 grand.
(33:08):
I mean it's a lot of fuckingmoney, right, but that's only
like it's 12x or something likethat not even so, but anytime,
anytime you win in the highroller room like you're not
cashing out for a little money,so most of the time when you win
it's a hand pay, so he'swaiting for the lady to pay him,
(33:29):
yeah, and he jumps on themachine next to him he just
whips out a new billfold with anew set of 300, he's fucking,
he's fucking cranking hundredsin there.
He put like two, three thousanddollars in fucking first spin.
He wins a hundred and fiftythousand dollars and you know,
(33:55):
then they come over and they'relike, oh my god, great win, you
know.
And uh, they start paying himout on the first win and now
they got to go start a new thing.
So he jumps on the next machineand he puts another fucking
several thousand dollars and andhe lost that.
But I'm like this guy is fuckedup.
Speaker 3 (34:16):
Dude, yeah, I was in Vegas and I was at Caesars and I
was just sitting at a machinejust like wasting time just
sitting there, you know, likesipping my drink chilling.
Speaker 2 (34:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (34:29):
And I was watching this woman and, yeah, she went
through like $10,000 in a matterof seconds, damn, $10,000 in a
matter of seconds, damn and justwhipped out her card, swiped it
again, loaded the machine with20 grand, blasted near through
almost all of it and took offLike it was nothing.
Yeah, like probably lost like$16,000.
Speaker 2 (34:47):
You gotta think of it 12 minutes.
You gotta think of it indifferent increments, like
someone that has a lot of money.
Increments like ours is like 20.
Like, say, you lose 200 bucks,you're like, fuck, I lost 200
bucks, right, her 200 hours is20 000.
Sick, it's sick.
It's like just the way it isfor rich fucking people.
Speaker 1 (35:07):
I mean I so, because I know so, my, my rules that I
have put in play for myself forgambling.
They're very specific and Iknow if I start breaking them
I'm just going to go fuckingnuts, I'm going to be fucking
going down there every fuckingminute.
Speaker 2 (35:29):
So why do they call you always a degenerate gambler,
degenerate, degenerate gambler?
It's just a phrase.
I know, I don't know.
He's not a degenerate gambler,degenerate, degenerate gambler,
just a phrase.
Speaker 1 (35:37):
I know, I don't know he's not a degenerate gambler.
Speaker 3 (35:42):
He's got a car, he's got a house.
Doesn't that fuck with you?
Speaker 2 (35:44):
Don't those words just kind of fuck with?
Speaker 3 (35:46):
you Degenerate, did you got a gambler.
Speaker 2 (35:49):
Go ahead, Tony, but uh.
You're a but when I go to mylocal Native American casino,
Would you just?
Call it home, you're mocking menow.
Speaker 1 (36:02):
Are you a fucker?
I have a $200 maximum.
Oh, that ain't worth fuckingdriving down there.
Speaker 2 (36:09):
Yeah, dude, that's not even worth it.
Speaker 1 (36:11):
I will not go in there with a fucking penny more,
unless I'm specifically goingto play poker.
Speaker 3 (36:19):
Yeah, you're not a degenerate dude.
Speaker 2 (36:21):
No, I'm not Dude.
You have to have at leastalmost a thousand to actually
get action going.
Speaker 1 (36:27):
If I fucking set that standard for myself, I will be
justifying it every fucking week.
Yeah, I don't go that.
Speaker 2 (36:35):
So you go that often then I don't go very much.
Speaker 3 (36:38):
500 bucks is what I bring.
Speaker 1 (36:41):
So it usually depends on, like, maybe once or twice a
year, me and Michelle go downtogether, so you you just get
these and I'll just decide likeI'll get off work early and I'll
be downtown and I'll be like,well, I'm spending the rest of
my day at Pottle.
Speaker 3 (37:00):
When I was a traveling salesman, I absolutely
stopped at a lot of casinos andwhen I was doing that I was a
hundred bucks.
I would just go in with ahundred bucks, slap it through
the machine.
I would never stay for morethan a half an hour.
Speaker 1 (37:13):
Let me ask you this Honestly I would never stay for
more than a half an hour.
Speaker 3 (37:15):
Let me ask you this Honestly I would do like that.
I'd use the points to get themeal, or whatever.
Speaker 2 (37:18):
Let me ask you this You've done that many times.
Have you ever had a situationwhere you were like, oh my God,
I want tons of money?
Speaker 3 (37:24):
Like hundreds, not tons, because, like I said so,
then really gambling is for justfun.
Speaker 2 (37:29):
Quit looking at my hand.
I'm trying to figure out.
Put mine when your hand isfucking all calloused and false
standing next to mine.
Speaker 3 (37:35):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (37:36):
Yeah, I don't know, I'm not so yeah, so I I gotta
realize that pottawatomie isoverall a shit casino.
It is when it comes to anythingthat plugs in.
That's true.
Table games are the table games, dude, I know.
But but I I also found out thattheir card shufflers that they
(38:00):
use now, um, can actually sortthe deck completely.
What does that mean?
They can put it one throughking or ace through king of
hearts, but I thought, when theyit can sort them out to factory
so the actual shufflingmachines can read the cards and
(38:26):
put them in certain orders.
Speaker 2 (38:28):
So I thought they have like seven decks they use
for like they do.
Speaker 1 (38:35):
But they know that they can assume that the table's
full and put it on a mix thatyour average blackjack table is
whatever five spots.
So if the table's full, there'ssix sequences of cards going
(38:56):
out you're telling me I can't,so they can make every six hands
be a.
Speaker 3 (39:04):
They really can't, but they could probably get
pretty damn close because theycan do it.
Like you're saying, themachines are connected to
computers that can shuffle adeck however it wants to shuffle
it, but people are going todraw, pick and and hit and stand
on different shit, right fivesand sixes, or 16s and 15s but
I'm saying, I'm saying it's,it's another way that you know
the saying the deck stackedagainst you, like that's why I
(39:28):
gotta play the wheel fortune.
You know what's the what?
The wheel of fortune machinewhere it's the man that spins
the fucking wheel yeah, so now?
Speaker 1 (39:35):
so now, if I'm playing cards, like if I'm
playing poker, that's different,because the casino doesn't have
a stake in it.
Well, they just want you tokeep playing.
They have a rake, which is muchdifferent, yep.
They just want the volume, butif I'm going to sit at a table
playing against the casino forsomething, it's only gonna be
(39:58):
hand shuffled.
And what games are those?
Speaker 2 (40:01):
though blackjack pitch mainly okay.
So I played blackjack when Iwas just there.
Really strange thing happened.
I don't know I I've only playedblackjack twice in my life
based in the casino, um and thenI got two eights.
I didn't know, like I know thatyou can take, like split them
and split.
I'm like I didn't know what theword was or what to say.
(40:23):
I'm like can I can take thesecards apart and, uh, gamble on
both of them?
She's like split them, likeyeah, bitch, yeah, so
everybody's gonna startsomewhere, bro.
She split them, okay, and thenI hit on the eight.
Obviously.
Speaker 3 (40:37):
Or no, no, no, no, you got another eight they throw
me two more.
Speaker 2 (40:40):
They throw me two more, one more card in each one.
And then I got like I don'tknow, 14.
And I hit on that one and Ibusted.
And then I on the other one, Igot another fucking eight.
It, it's just like do you wantto split again?
(41:03):
I'm like bitch, you alreadytook 50 dollars from me.
No, that's not.
But again, that's not odd, thathappens almost every time.
And I said, no, I'm gonna stay.
Speaker 1 (41:07):
And then she obviously got like an 18, I
think.
Yeah, I stayed at 16.
It happens I've done it whenI'm playing blackjack pitch.
That's usually single or doubledeck and it moves fucking fast,
would you hit it?
16?
Speaker 2 (41:20):
it depends on what the dealer had you can see what
the dealer has, what their carddeck off is.
Speaker 3 (41:26):
I didn't even look at what the fuck it was.
Speaker 2 (41:29):
I think it was a face card.
So a face card, yeah prettysure it was a face card.
Speaker 1 (41:33):
So on a face card.
Speaker 2 (41:35):
she can only hit so many times and then she'll bust.
So on a face card she's morelikely to bust.
Speaker 1 (41:39):
Is that what it is On a face card?
No, on a face card, you'repretty much assuming that she
has 20.
That the other one's going tobe a face card, because there's
the most face cards in the deck.
But no, there is, there's moreface cards than anything One
through ten and then Jack.
Speaker 2 (41:58):
Queen, King.
Speaker 1 (41:59):
How is there more face cards?
Speaker 3 (42:00):
So if there's seven decks, Just do one deck, dude,
don't start with seven, yeah, doone deck.
Speaker 2 (42:07):
There's not more face cards there, absolutely is.
Speaker 3 (42:10):
How?
Because there's only four aces,or aces don't go, there's only
four twos.
Yeah, it's not only four aces,or the aces don't go.
There's only four, two, there'sonly four, threes, there's only
four fours, yada, yada, yada,but there's five sets of tens,
so there's 25 sets of kings kingis a 10.
There's four of those, and thenthe eight, the queen is a 10
(42:30):
there's 16 tens in the deck myfault.
Speaker 2 (42:32):
Okay, in that instance.
Speaker 1 (42:34):
Yes, you're right, so I was saying so, you always
assume that the card that'sfacing down is another 10 got
you.
So she's showing a 10 and Ihave a pair of eights.
Yeah, I personally am notsplitting them because I gotta
assume at best'm going to havetwo 18s against her 20.
Speaker 2 (42:53):
You don't want to lose more.
Speaker 1 (42:55):
So at 16, I'm better off just taking a hit and more
than likely busting and justlosing one money.
Speaker 3 (43:04):
I'm a stander on 16.
I did stand at 16.
Speaker 1 (43:06):
I lost.
But if she has and I know I'mgender labeling my dealer right
now but if she is showing a five, if she is showing a five, if
she is showing a five and I got,I got a 16 I'm probably hitting
that because you are probablystaying on it I'm probably
(43:29):
staying on 16 because I got toassume that she has a 10 under,
so she's gonna have 15 and thenshe's gonna pull another 10.
So I mean you just got to playthe odds like I would never
split eights against the 10 well, thank you very much.
Speaker 2 (43:46):
I did, yeah, and that's fine.
I didn't know what the fuck todo.
I knew that I was like hey, Igot two of the same I could do
something extra.
Speaker 1 (43:53):
I'm also like.
Michelle plays blackjack withme when we go to the casino and
she's always nervous becauseshe's worried about everybody
getting pissed oh, because youtake their car.
Speaker 2 (44:04):
Yeah, yeah, and she's been yelled at, and all this
other shit, who cares?
Speaker 1 (44:08):
yeah fuck them.
I don't fuck off, I don't everfucking care when somebody is
playing what I would consider tobe stupid, because I can't
believe your wife would be, andreally in the end we're both
probably going to lose, yeah, sowhat the fuck does it matter?
I can't believe your wife wouldbe that would think like that.
Speaker 2 (44:27):
I think she would be like fuck you, I don't give a
fuck.
She fought off a guy here witha knife.
Remember that story?
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (44:38):
And she's afraid of a card.
Oh, she doesn't want to be inthat awkward thing of her making
a bad decision and some fuckingbusinessman from toledo ohio,
like the fucking bitch, doesn'teven know how to play this game
well, so as far as casinos go,what do we know about casinos?
Speaker 2 (44:55):
the?
Speaker 1 (44:55):
ones ones in Vegas are typically better.
The ones on stolen NativeAmerican land are usually
fucking terrible, because reallyit's just a different form of
reparations.
Speaker 2 (45:07):
Okay, I agree with that, because I really have
never really won, you know.
Speaker 1 (45:12):
Native Americans own the casinos, but you rarely see
native americans gambling ever,ever, I've never even seen one
working there.
Speaker 2 (45:24):
So, uh, as far as casinos go, they're fun, but
they're just for fun, right guys?
Speaker 1 (45:29):
yep, never make money , you know just you know, I see
them as a business opportunity.
Speaker 2 (45:35):
But you do you, then why come you haven't turned into
?
Speaker 3 (45:37):
a business, yet motherfucker entertainment
purposes only.
All right, chris.
No, shut her down.
Jay, leave me out.
Speaker 2 (45:44):
Shut her down okay, I basically just did so.
Speaker 1 (45:48):
Remember, casinos suck, I don't know what else to
do, chris, I'm lost well, youcan definitely edit this out.
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