June 24, 2025 • 41 mins
Jay and Chris discuss the uncomfortable realities of dealing with aggressive dogs while working in clients' homes, sharing personal stories of dog attacks and the complex aftermath.
• Jay recounts getting bitten by a client's poodle and how he instinctively punched the dog to defend himself
• Chris shares his more severe dog attack experience involving a Weimaraner that resulted in bleeding through his clothes
• The hosts debate whether homeowners should be notified when their dogs bite contractors
• Discussion about the legal implications of dog bites and homeowner responsibilities for providing safe work environments
• Exploration of how dogs behave differently when their owners aren't present
• Chris details a plumbing disaster that flooded a client's house in the same week as his dog bite
• Warning about potential serious health consequences of dog bites, including infection risks
• Advice for contractors on establishing clear boundaries about pets before beginning work
If a dog has bitten you, even if it seems minor, please seek medical attention as infections can develop and lead to serious complications.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Top Shelf Stories with J, chris and Tony.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Yo, I got bit by a dog today at work, Chris.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
So you were in somebody's house and their dog
bit you.
Speaker 2 (00:32):
I'm doing their floor and their bathroom and the wet
saw I'm using to cut the tile isin the garage.
So I have to walk 50 feet fromthat bedroom to the garage and
usually this lady, when I firstgot there to the job, she told
me that this, your dogs arefucking mean.
Was it a little tiny dog?
(00:53):
It's like a poodle fuckingthing.
It's a medium-sized dog butlike up to your knees, yeah okay
, why you want to say it's up tomy knees, no, because no,
because it's always Well yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:05):
Yeah, I gave you that .
Speaker 1 (01:07):
Yeah, it's gotten so bad, you're giving yourself the
short jokes.
Well, tony's not here right now.
That's why, because it alwaysseems to be these little dogs
that are so freaking meanFucking nippers.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
So she, my dog fucking bites.
Yeah, yours is a little tinydog this dog bit me so hard that
I have two puncture wounds inmy leg and I have some bruising
around my calf.
Anyway, I was walking out ofthe bathroom was it a chawini?
No, it was a type of poodletalking to the microphones Tony
(01:41):
oh, we're recording.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
Jay likes to do these little interludes here.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
And then what happened was I was walking out
of the bathroom.
Speaker 3 (01:52):
What happened was?
Speaker 2 (01:54):
And the dog chased me .
Speaker 1 (01:57):
Oh, you started running.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
No, I didn't.
Speaker 3 (02:00):
I thought I should have but Were you wearing your
red sweatpants like a matador?
Like a?
What Like a matador?
Like a?
What Like a matador?
What's?
Speaker 2 (02:09):
a matador, the bullfighters with the red.
Oh gotcha, are you sure you'resaying that right?
Yeah, I'd like you to spellthat now.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
I'm not.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
Just start with the first letter.
Speaker 3 (02:20):
No, I'm not a speller .
Speaker 1 (02:22):
I just misspelled it on my writing it down.
Speaker 2 (02:26):
I went with m-a-t-i-d-o-r I think it's how
it's spelled, how it sounds.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
It does not look correct let me check the
internet the internet will neverlie to me.
Let me find out.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
Just talk to text it but here's the thing, here's
what happened.
The dog bit me and I actuallypunched it in the face.
Well, I didn't really like, Ididn't connect very well, but
you fucking piece of shit to getit off of me, you, I punched it
in the face.
Speaker 3 (02:55):
How dare you lay your hands on another?
Speaker 2 (02:57):
man's dog.
This dog laid hands on me first.
I was playing defense role.
What if this was a child?
I would punch in the face too.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
I misspelled it.
It's Madador M-A-T-A-D-O-R.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
Chris, if a dog bit you in the leg, would you punch
it in the face?
It's a fight at that point.
Yeah, I couldn't kick it.
I'm fighting back.
Speaker 1 (03:22):
I'm taking my jewelry off.
If the first hit doesn't knockme out, I'm taking his shirt off
.
Speaker 3 (03:28):
What the fuck?
Back it up.
Take it off these Jordans.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
Starts getting people to record it.
I would have kicked it, but ithad my leg.
Speaker 1 (03:40):
So the dog bit you and you punched it.
Yeah, I mean, I didn't fullyconnect.
Did it go?
Did it go?
So the dog bit you and youpunched it.
Speaker 2 (03:44):
Yeah, I mean I didn't fully connect Did it go Did it
go.
And it kind of like jumped back.
Speaker 1 (03:52):
Did the lady come screaming?
Speaker 2 (03:54):
No.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Oh, my God, my baby.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
See, she's usually there to stop these fucking
midget dogs from attacking me.
She wasn't there and that's whyI was like fuck, what's going
on?
She's in the bathroom taking ashower or something.
She just let him go and thefucker chased me to the garage,
punch him in the face, wow sowhat'd?
You do about it I don't nothing.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
You didn't do anything about it you see that,
why wouldn't you?
Speaker 3 (04:19):
do anything I'm a dog bite survivor oh, I thought
that super terrible homemadejapanese writing tattoo was the
bruises.
I was like holy shit, oh, nevermind, it's just that little
pimple.
Yeah, it looks like a littleingrown hair on your leg.
Speaker 2 (04:36):
Yeah, I mean, it didn't.
It didn't tear apart my leg,but I got it and it brew I'm
bruising, so why aren't yougonna do anything about it?
Speaker 3 (04:43):
that's because of your iron deficiency.
Speaker 2 (04:46):
Don't say that I probably am.
Speaker 1 (04:48):
No, I'm kind of serious with this question.
Why aren't you going to doanything about it?
Speaker 2 (04:51):
I've been bit by a couple dogs already.
I don't know, maybe I should.
Speaker 3 (04:55):
This house was on a lake in a conical walk.
It's a good way to make extramoney.
It's like a $4 or $5 millionhouse.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
No, because it's not like that, tony, you should
understand this maybe too.
Here's my perspective.
Right, and I'm on this side ofit, so say I'm the homeowner.
Right, and you came to my houseto do a job.
Speaker 3 (05:16):
Hold on a second.
This is really turning into afull-length thing.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
I thought you said you were going to top-shelf
stories with Jay, chris and Tony.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
That's not how it works, Tony.
I think it's how it works.
You can add it in later.
You fucked it up, Tony.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
Well, turn it off.
Welcome to the show guys.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
So look at it this way, jay.
So you got bit by a dog.
The homeowner was in charge ofmaking sure that you, as worker,
have a safe place to work.
You explained to the homeownerthat you were going to be in the
bathroom working.
Your job site was the bathroom,but that you needed also
(05:55):
workspace in the garage.
Yeah, and you probably askedthe homeowner, and they provided
and said yes, you can work inthe garage.
She.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
She moved her one of 16 cars out of the garage.
Speaker 1 (06:07):
This gets to my point now.
Okay, so now you're in thegarage and let's say you're and
this wouldn't happen necessarilybut let's say your tile saw
blade got loose while you wereusing it, it killed the dog, or
a piece of tile got rejectedfrom your tile saw as you were
using it and it fired off andsmashed the window of one of
(06:28):
their cars.
Speaker 3 (06:30):
That the dog was in.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
And the dog died.
This is a situation similar toa dog biting you that no one
really expected to have happen,right, yeah, now you complete
the job and you tell thehomeowner hey, while I was in
the garage, a piece of tile wentoff and chipped a window of
your car.
(06:53):
Do you think the homeowner'sgonna say, oh man, that's wild,
I can't believe that happened.
Thanks for letting me know.
I feel so bad for putting mycar there.
Do you need a glass of water,are you okay?
No, but when the dog bit you,it wasn't expected, right, but
(07:17):
there's damages that were caused, right?
Speaker 2 (07:22):
so as someone who's there.
Speaker 1 (07:23):
So I'm saying this like you have to look at it, you
might go into a hundred housesand not have anything happen,
but every once in a while youaccidentally destroy their door
or break a window or whatever,and you compensate them by
giving them money off the job orpaying for the damages.
Right?
Speaker 2 (07:41):
Because that's what you do Not saying anything or
not saying anything.
Well so do you think the?
Speaker 1 (07:46):
homeowner's going to not say anything if you broke
their bathroom mirror.
Speaker 2 (07:52):
Yeah, they would say something Okay.
Speaker 1 (07:55):
So you didn't even tell the lady, the dog bit you.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
No.
Speaker 1 (07:58):
Oh bro.
Speaker 2 (07:59):
Because I punched it in the face.
I thought that was retribution.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
Now it's going to be her dogs down her cam at her
house, her house, danny cams andshe's gonna sue you for hitting
their dog.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
It's all right, it was deep, but they'll see what
really happened how do you thinkthey got such a nice house,
dude?
Speaker 3 (08:15):
so now, how are you gonna deal with this rabies?
Speaker 2 (08:18):
why do you say that shit?
Why you fuck with me, dude?
My wife said the same thing.
She's like you better haveshots, have shots.
I'm like what, talk about shots?
Are you going back to thisplace?
Yeah, tomorrow morning.
She's like she told me thisgoing there about tomorrow
morning to grout.
And she's like what time areyou coming?
I said, uh, eight, three, nine.
And she's I'm like make sure oryou will.
(08:47):
Yeah, see now.
Now it's too late.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
I'm walking in with the fucking Pipe iron You'll be
wearing, like a chainsaw, man'sleather outfit.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
I was thinking about wearing, yeah, something like
I'm gonna tape some magazinesAround my ankles and my legs so
that if it bites me this time itwon't pierce me, just like you
do with zombies.
We know they can't bite throughthe magazines you tape around
your arm um you ever see thatmovie?
Speaker 3 (09:11):
so the two times that I've been brutally attacked by
dogs on job sites?
Speaker 1 (09:18):
um, looking back on it now, all I see it is is
missed opportunities so, tony,when you say no, it's not that
you like want to change yourentire life trajectory by suing
the shit out of someone andclaiming you know this.
What are they call that?
A white flag?
Like it's not.
You're not.
I'm not saying that Jay's needsto like make this huge deal out
(09:42):
of the fact that he got bit.
But if you got bit by my dog atmy house and you didn't tell me
, I'd be kind of pissed actually, because if you tell me at
least, then I can be like areyou fine?
Can I have you sign this sheetof paper?
You're not going to sue my assnow.
Speaker 2 (09:56):
Let me buy you guys lunch the rest of the time
you're here.
I'd feel terrible.
I can sue.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
I don't think you need to sue, but like you can
definitely sue you sure couldabsolutely.
You got attacked by a free adog that the woman or the
homeowner had stated to you wasa mean dog might bite you like,
yeah, well, yeah, don't, don'tcome closer, don't look at it,
don't try to pet it.
You certainly could sue, bro,but not anymore, because you
(10:28):
didn't say anything.
But I don't know why you I'mnot saying you definitely can.
I'm not saying, you should sue,I'm not gonna sue and I'm not
saying like this, like youshould sue a little bit yeah
like don't go crazy with it,I'll charge extra hundred
dollars in the bill.
Speaker 3 (10:42):
No, no, no, you should get at least at least a
year's worth of salary for aneedle hole no, because now it's
, it's the, the trauma of it.
You're already afraid ofeverything.
You're a hypochondriac.
Now you got to deal with rabiesand and now you're gonna be you
(11:07):
.
You won't work in anybody'shouse with a dog now.
So now this is like a wholelifespan of missed opportunities
.
Speaker 1 (11:14):
Oh man, you're really taking this down the lane at
judge judy's judgment here.
You started it, chris.
Well, no, because I'm justsaying like so the last.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
So the last time I got bit on a job site, it was
well, it wasn't even a job siteyet, it was an estimate.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
You're looking at what your future holds if you
get that job.
Speaker 3 (11:36):
I did get that job and I did have a very special
set of rules for that job, andalso I itemized all my shit that
it fucked up.
What did it?
What did this dog do it?
It?
Uh well, it bit me right here.
It ripped my pants.
(11:57):
I had fucking blood all over myshoes.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
I made is this right in front of the, the uh guy
owner see, this is a bigger bitethan what.
Speaker 3 (12:06):
Yeah, no, I got, but this is a little freaking well,
this was kind of an interestingstory, right, because I go to
this estimate and it's at thisbig, fucking beautiful house and
it's, it's one of these bigcement staircases to walk up it
and fucking fountain on, uh, bythe vestibule, you know, and I'm
standing at the front door andit's no, I don't know, but go on
(12:29):
it's these big double glassdoors that look straight through
the house.
So while I'm knocking on thedoor and I don't know who the
fuck these people are like I Iknow nothing about them, I no
context I see a man and a womanin the backyard playing with a
dog and they're like in theirearly 30s and he kind of sees me
(12:56):
through the house and likewaves me to walk back and I
don't know if he's trying totell me to walk through the
house or go around, but I'm like, well, fuck it, he's waving me
in and I I go to open the doorand it's locked.
So I'm like, all right, well,now I gotta walk around the
house because he's fucking fucktired.
Yeah, I'm not doing aren'tcoming in open.
(13:17):
I'm not doing this up, so I walkaround to the back of the house
and they had a dog called aweimer reiner yeah, which is a
big gray hunting dog.
They're not good like familypets or anything, but they're
amazing bird hunting dogs.
So I go around back and now I'm.
Now I'm like in this dog shit.
(13:39):
And this dog runs up andfucking starts attacking me.
Like attacking me Instantly,yes, Like it's seen me turn the
corner and it fucking runs fullspeed at me and.
I'm like what did you do when itran at you?
I'm like, oh shit, Did you back?
Speaker 2 (13:57):
up?
No, I stood my ground.
Did you grab the knife out theback of your pocket that you
keep there and start swiping?
Speaker 3 (14:03):
I didn't.
I said I stood my ground, Igrabbed it by its fucking throat
after it bit you no it didn'tbite me yet.
Well, maybe that's why you wereattacking it.
Well, it jumped at me, like atmy face, and I grabbed it by its
neck and I was fucking chokingit and I threw the dog away from
me and I yelled for thesepeople to get their dog and
(14:23):
they're just standing therestaring.
Speaker 1 (14:25):
I was going to ask what the hell are they doing?
Speaker 3 (14:28):
They're literally just, they're 40 yards from me,
just fucking staring at me goingoh my God, what do we do?
What do we do?
And I throw their dog back athim and I'm like get your
fucking dog.
And the dog starts running backtoward him and he gets about
halfway there and then turnsaround and fucking runs back at
me and I'm like what the fuck?
(14:49):
And it's, oh god, it's runningat me and I, I fucking.
That's when he took off when itjumps at me.
I fucking like swatted it by theside of its head and like
pushed it back the other way andI'm like, okay, it's, it's done
.
It's gonna go back now like itwas just seeing one more time.
(15:10):
It was giving it the oldcollege try.
It's gonna try to get me and Iassume it's, it's gonna run so
do you remember?
The body of this dog back.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
So you remember in your head like okay, I got
attacked, I won, it's defeated,it's walking away now like it
you.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
You were like all right, that's over yeah, I'm
like that's over, it's gonna goback by them, they're gonna get
it in the fucking house.
They still haven't doneanything.
I mean it seems like fuckingminutes and like a half hour,
but it's like been like nineseconds right.
So I I shoo this dog away fromme, I get its head pointed the
(15:48):
other way and like I'm fuckingyelling at them to get their
fucking dog and they're likecome here, rex, or whatever the
fuck it's, come here, come here,boy.
And uh, when I get its headpointed away from me and its ass
pointed toward me, I assumeit's going to run back.
(16:10):
And instead it immediatelyturns around and fucking bites
my leg, yikes.
And then I choke the dogunconscious.
So I choke the thing until it'sfucking laying there.
Oh, my.
God.
Speaker 1 (16:23):
And they murdered a dog.
They're still not.
These homeowners are still notStill haven't done anything.
Speaker 3 (16:28):
Come on, it takes at least.
And the dog's laying there, I'mstraddled over it, fucking
choking it, and I'm like, I'mlike yo, you need to go get a
fucking leash and put it on thisgoddamn dog.
And I'm like, and I say to theguy I'm like, why the fuck did
you wave me back here If you gota fucking vicious dog?
And he said, he said somethinglike I didn't think the dog was
(16:53):
going to be an issue.
I didn't think the dog wasgoing to be an issue.
I'm sorry.
Speaker 2 (16:57):
You just look like one of those people that dogs
want to attack.
Speaker 3 (17:01):
So the woman comes back out with a leash, puts it
on the dog.
Speaker 1 (17:06):
Does she have a towel now and a cold compress?
And a high life for you, mypants are ripped up.
Speaker 3 (17:10):
There's fucking blood all over my pants.
It's soaking into my shoe,Jesus yeah you're good.
Speaker 2 (17:18):
Good thing he didn't get you by your dick.
Speaker 3 (17:21):
It looked like it was close where you showed me.
I was like, and I saidsomething, and they're like,
well, what are you here for?
They waved you back.
They didn't even know what youwere there for.
I'm like we had an appointment.
Like you set this up with meand are you high up with me?
(17:45):
And uh, are you high?
And they're like, oh, it was,you probably have an appointment
with my dad, well.
And I'm like, oh, you guys arejust fucking full adults that
still live with your parents.
Speaker 2 (17:52):
Oh, okay wow, it was a sister.
Speaker 3 (17:56):
so these are like the fucking sheltered kids of a
rich person.
Wow, yikes.
And so now I'm sitting there.
They just waved a stranger intotheir backyard.
I'm like you didn't even likedude, I don't know what the fuck
.
Come on, we're having a party,but this older man comes out.
(18:22):
You know his like 70s.
And the guy, you know, he'sdressed in a suit and he opens
up the door and he is like ifyou still want to measure,
that's the area at the bottom ofthe stairs over there, I got
the dog locked up.
he goes what are you gonnafucking sue me now?
And he's doing this while he'son a call and he's holding his
(18:43):
hand over the receiver and he'slike what are you going to
fucking sue me now?
And I said, well, the thoughthadn't crossed my mind until you
brought it up.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
Right.
Speaker 3 (18:55):
And so this was set up through a contractor that at
that time I mean I still dobusiness with them, but at that
time I did just a ton ofbusiness, like they made up for
a good portion of my company'swork for the year.
(19:16):
Sure, so I'm like well, I'm notgoing to start some big fucking
thing about this.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
Like it's a little dog bite, it's fine, like it's
bloody as fuck, but whateverthat's kind of a dickhead thing
to do come out on the phone, noteven get off the phone, and
then say hey, are you assumingeven not even that?
Like, are you still gonnameasure?
So you're sue me?
Speaker 1 (19:37):
That tells me this guy's probably been sued before
for his dog bites.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
Well, so I didn't report it, I didn't do shit with
it, I didn't go to the doctor Ireally should have.
So you have rabies now.
You've been living with rabies.
That's why I'm urging you to goget looked at.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
What does rabies?
Speaker 3 (19:57):
do to you.
Oh dude, I foam at the mouthall the time.
I thought that was just normal.
Speaker 2 (20:02):
I communicate well with raccoons.
I thought that was normal.
When you get hungry, you foamat the mouth, Dude it's really
wild.
Speaker 3 (20:09):
I eat out of dumpsters at night.
Speaker 2 (20:11):
That's normal.
Speaker 1 (20:12):
I'm pretty sure the end, the main, yeah, you die bro
.
Speaker 3 (20:18):
That's what happens, there's no cure for rabies, the
sickest of the brain and you die.
But uh, uh, the the guy's wifecalls me and she's being real
sweet because she doesn't wantto get sued, and and, uh, she
kind of said something aboutlike are you going to report it?
(20:42):
Like you're not going to reportit.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
So this is her dog, she's the sugar mama or he's the
sugar daddy.
Yeah, I got it all figured out.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
Yeah, he's like some big shot physician.
She's a stay-at-home mom whodidn't who didn't happen to be
home for the remodeling projectestimate that she instigated and
, uh, turns out they've had thisdog for like two months.
It was a you know who rescuedwho.
Yeah and and they've had thisdog for like two months and I
(21:19):
was the third person.
That it's like fucking fuckedup, yeah, and if I would have
reported it they would have losttheir dog, which really makes
me sad that I didn't report it,because that dog should be
fucking put down.
Speaker 1 (21:34):
They probably had other people get bit, although
the dog probably just shouldn'tbe in a family home.
Speaker 2 (21:39):
Was this bad enough?
Where you got a scar?
You're explaining that you'rebleeding down the leg into your
shoe.
Don't lift your leg up thathigh.
You point it towards your dickalmost.
Speaker 3 (21:50):
Do you want me to pull him down?
Speaker 2 (21:52):
Yeah, maybe Jesus.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
I don't know why I keep coming here every week.
Speaker 2 (21:58):
I don't see anything, man.
I just see hair.
Speaker 3 (22:00):
No, just hair yeah, because it might have been like
right here, so it was right inhere somewhere so he grabbed you
.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
He didn't shake, he just grabbed you, got you like
punctured your skin.
Speaker 3 (22:12):
He definitely shook.
He's like I felt he shook untilhe couldn't breathe anymore.
But so when I did go throughand estimate that job and do the
job because, like I said, I waskind of in a fucking bad spot
you said you got the job too,yeah what was this.
Speaker 2 (22:35):
Can we go to the part where you gave him rules about
the job, the part where you givethem rules about the job?
Speaker 3 (22:41):
Well, I made them remove the dog from the house
every day before we got thereand the dog wasn't allowed to be
there.
And they're like, oh no, we'llcreate it the whole time you're
here and I'm like that fuckingdog leaves, leaves this house.
I'm like you fucking, board itfor a week, take it to doggy
daycare, whatever you need to do.
(23:07):
Right, we're at their house forlike two weeks and and they
stuck by it and I did chargethem for my clothes, which were
full price.
No, kohl's cash, nothing.
These are 65.
Speaker 1 (23:14):
Union bay these are $65.
Union Bay carpenter pants theseare $38.
Speaker 3 (23:25):
Adidas.
No Kohl's cash.
No man, it was Levi's and Keens.
Speaker 2 (23:30):
Keens are damn.
They make clothing.
Speaker 3 (23:32):
So I got a little over $200 in damaged goods.
Speaker 1 (23:43):
Was that worth it for your?
Speaker 2 (23:44):
traumatic.
That was a line item was that200 worth it, bro, and?
Speaker 3 (23:47):
then, dude, this is like it.
Just thinking back to this week, this was like the fucking
worst week of my fucking career.
So this happened to me and Ileft a job site to go do this
estimate at the time they choseand then went back to my job.
(24:09):
So I go back to my job and I'mwaiting for my wife to bring me
a new set of clothes, becausethese ones are covered in blood,
sure, sure.
And I get back to the house andit was this really cool single
guy who had this big, huge,massive lake house and me and
him got along great and all thisshit.
And I, I get back to a placeand he's like what the fuck
(24:33):
happened to you and I said I gotattacked by a dog.
Speaker 1 (24:37):
You had to do an estimate, not a drug deal.
Did you get shot in the leg?
I said I got.
I got attacked by a dog.
I thought you had to do anestimate, not a drug deal.
Did you get shot in the leg?
Speaker 3 (24:41):
I said I got attacked by a dog at an estimate.
He goes that's about the rudestthing you could do is just let
your dog fucking like.
Speaker 2 (24:57):
Let it go, they're free yeah let it go, they're
free.
Speaker 3 (25:05):
Yeah, like he's.
He's like people are soinconsiderate.
If you have a fucking dog and astranger's coming in your house
, you should definitely put yourdog away, like tell a stranger
coming, yes, and I said no, Iagree a hundred percent, I do
that with my dog.
Um, your dog michelle getsthere.
Michelle gets there with, uh,with my clothes.
I change, go back to doing mywork the next morning.
(25:29):
This fucking guy who was therethe whole time he's retired, you
know he's like, oh, I'm gonnago out for a couple hours and
I'm like, alright, no problem,and I go to take off the plastic
ring around his shower head andand he did all his own plumbing
and he did something with thescrew that holds it's called a
(25:55):
plaster ring, the screw thatholds the plaster ring to his
shower valve assembly on.
Yep, uh, the screw that he had,and it was also the screw that
holds on the cartridge yeah,that's uh gonna make a lot of
water come spraying at you a lotof water I found that out the
(26:17):
hard way.
Never ending amount of water sothe funny thing is is I didn't
have the board up on the backwall, so it's spraying into the
wall and going straight downinto the basement with and it's
like flooding this fucking room.
That happened to be the roomwhere he had his display of this
(26:41):
primitive, irreplaceable bowand arrow collection.
Oh christ, hanging on the wall,shut up.
It's fucking leaking down theselike turn of the century indian
artifact, fucking homemadeballs dude.
And I'm running around thehouse trying to find the fucking
water shut off, that he hasburied in some fucking closet in
(27:03):
the basement somewhere.
Speaker 1 (27:06):
It is a fucking nightmare some of those valves
have what are called stops, andthere's a shut off on the valve
so you can change the cartridgeout.
But those are normally like tendollars more than the other
valves and only used onapartment complexes.
So there's a little set,there's a little screw where you
(27:29):
can shut off right before wherethat cartridge is the water
coming?
You had basically, wherever itwas, I mean if it was in the
city, you had like 18 gallonsper minute shooting out at you.
If it was on some pump system,you might have had 100.
Speaker 3 (27:50):
When you're in the middle of it, it feels like a
lot more than 18 gallons aminute it's.
Speaker 1 (27:56):
That's a lot.
Think about filling up 18gallons of water with your sink,
your sink's spitting out likeone and a quarter gallon per
minute maybe two.
Speaker 3 (28:05):
So so this shit.
I had to have my wife bring meclothes to this job site two
days in a row.
Jesus Bro, there was so muchwater, so did this guy end up
charging you for his shit.
Ironically, no, not at all.
There you go.
I didn't ruin Nothing gotruined.
Speaker 1 (28:27):
I mean, if they're old enough, they've been wet
before Right.
They weren't baseball cards.
Speaker 3 (28:33):
He comes in.
There's fucking watereverywhere.
I'm down in the basement, hecut.
He's coming down the stairs,he's like.
He's like what happened and Isaid well, I said you had the
screw that holds that cover.
I needed to take off, uh like Idon't understand exactly how
(28:55):
you're saying this is, but likeyou, took the screw out of the
cartridge and he like crammedthat thing like behind it so I
couldn't get it out and thenscrewed that screw back in and I
didn't realize that it was.
That was the cartridge like Ididn't under.
I didn't know that it was.
That was the cartridge, Like Ididn't under.
I didn't know that Cause I don'treally know shit about plumbing
, so I'm like oh, that the theplaster rings being held on by
(29:19):
this screw, which it was, but itwas just because it was jammed
behind it and not yeah.
So this fucking guy's like well, let me dig out the
dehumidifiers, let's get thisshit dried up.
He's like boy, are you having aweek?
Speaker 1 (29:37):
he's cool about it eh that's good.
Cj, you could have told them,and they would have been cool
about it that you got bit by adog, but yeah, that's where this
came from is your story aboutthe dog it spiraled into and
then Tony got bit by a dog.
But yeah, I've been, I've been.
Speaker 2 (29:51):
That's where this came from, is your story about
the dog it spiraled into, andthen tony got bit by a dog and
maybe someday he'll tell us thestory of the other time he got
bit.
Speaker 3 (29:58):
Oh, and you know what , dude, I'm definitely gonna get
bit by more dogs, becausenobody has the common courtesy
to put their dogs away when yougo into their house and what
people don't realize is oh, mydog is the sweetest dog in the
world, my dog loves this.
You know, my dog's never beenaggressive toward anybody, but
(30:20):
that doesn't, that doesn't stopthe fact that I'm a stranger
walking into their house, right,and dogs instinctually protect
their family.
And then also that, see, thisis the other thing, because I
make everybody lock their dogsup when they're not home.
And I'm there because I tellpeople your dog acts differently
(30:40):
when you're not home, becausenow it's on full like protection
mode and fucking circling thehouse and not letting you do
shit.
Speaker 2 (30:47):
I'm definitely getting an attack tomorrow when
she's at the gym.
Speaker 3 (30:50):
So you remember that house?
We did uh when you worked forme.
It was a big ass shower.
Maybe you weren't there.
You know the first job erichelped you on where you had him
do those pebbles we did theneighbor's house.
Do you remember doing theneighbor's house?
I don't know.
It was a master, a masterbathroom and it had a big.
Speaker 2 (31:12):
I don't remember.
I did last month, 1997.
No, this wasn't that long ago.
Is it the one where the ladyput the the pee thingies next to
the front door where littledogs peed?
Speaker 3 (31:21):
and shit.
No, they had a big dog, but itwas.
They had a big rounded bench intheir shower that we we made
anyway.
But they, they had this fuckingwild ass dog and you would walk
in in.
This fucking hallway was like60 feet.
We had to walk down and thatdog would sit at the end of the
hallway and fucking growl at youand not let you walk in the
(31:45):
hallway.
Dude, I carried a fucking two byfour when I walked through that
hallway no, I'm like, I'm goingto have to fuck this dog up and
it became like I sat down withthe homeowners like three days
into this fucking 20-day job andI'm like you guys need to
fucking lock this dog up andthey thought that like I was
(32:11):
being an asshole about it.
I'm like your fucking dogdoesn't let me walk down this
hallway.
It's there in grawls.
I'm like you guys are here.
That dog's fucking sweet as pie.
That dog fucking.
You guys are out of sight.
This dog's a fucking assholeand it doesn't want me in its
house.
I'm like you guys got to lockthis fucking dog up.
I'm not dealing with this everytime and then I'm gonna end up
(32:33):
fucking your dog up and you'regonna be all upset at me they're
gonna come downstairs.
Speaker 2 (32:37):
They're gonna see you holding the dog by a choke hold
choked out.
Speaker 1 (32:43):
So you said your dog bites.
You're just a french bulldog.
Yeah, so that friend of mine,lauren, that I have, she has a
french bulldog she has two ofthem actually, and this one hank
, he, you.
You have to let him bite you orhe will continue to try to
freaking bite you.
But you know, your dog, it's atiny little thing, it just nips
(33:03):
your little hand or your arm oryour whatever.
Speaker 3 (33:05):
But if you don't let it fucking bite you, it's gonna
try to bite you the whole timeyou're there and I bet you she
takes it everywhere and tells no, no, she doesn't do that no,
she puts it behind the littlegate and then if someone's like
you can cut dog, come on.
Speaker 1 (33:17):
He's like she's.
She says that hank will biteyou, it won't hurt that bad, he
won't bite to kill, but he'llbite you and then he'll be fine,
otherwise I'll leave him overthere.
And then he just stays overthere behind the little kid gate
, barks the whole fucking time.
Speaker 2 (33:33):
It's so wild we were at the German beer hall downtown
and my cousin he's always gotthe shepherds and he's not
afraid of dogs at all.
He was.
Someone had a dog outside ofthe bar and it was on a leash.
The dog was just kind ofsitting there and the person,
(33:53):
talc or my cousin, came up tothe dog and the person's like I
don't, I wouldn't trust youcoming that close to it.
He's like I'm fine, I'm fine.
He puts his face in front ofthe dog, grabs it by the ears,
starts petting it and the fuckerbites him in the face.
Speaker 3 (34:09):
In the face.
Speaker 2 (34:10):
Cut his nose open and I'm like Is it a blood relative
?
Speaker 3 (34:16):
Does he have that Wisniewski nose?
Speaker 2 (34:19):
No, he doesn't have a big nose, he has more of a
squished nose.
So he had some cushion there toget ripped.
Yeah, I don't trust him.
I don't care if it's achihuahua, I'm not afraid of
dogs.
Speaker 1 (34:30):
I'm not afraid of them.
I don't care if it's achihuahua, I'm not afraid.
I don't trust them.
I'm not afraid of dogs, I don'tthink it's a problem.
Speaker 2 (34:32):
I'm not afraid of dogs.
I'm not afraid I've been bit bytoo many of them.
I'm not afraid I've not beenbit by a dog, though.
Speaker 3 (34:43):
When you get bit, when you finally get bit, maybe
you'll be afraid, Maybe, and Igot it's fucking like what are
you supposed to do?
Speaker 1 (34:51):
Like you said, you gave Jay shit for hitting the
thing.
You fucking choked it out.
Speaker 2 (34:56):
Like dude, what do you do?
Speaker 1 (34:57):
And then you guys all laughed at me when I said, yeah
, it's fucking war at this point.
Speaker 2 (35:01):
No, man, he did a suplex that I did on a fucking
file drive.
Speaker 1 (35:04):
I'm not going to attack.
I got a bigger operation here.
But if you attack me, I'm goingto fight to kill.
I'm on the way back.
Speaker 3 (35:16):
In good fun.
I'm shaming Jay for fuckingthis dog up, you just do it
regardless of anything.
That dog would have got puntedto the ceiling.
Speaker 1 (35:23):
It's going to bite you again tomorrow.
Yeah, that's why, 100% Dude,it's at home trading right now.
It's chewing on half a cow legbone, just eating into it.
Speaker 3 (35:37):
It's doing one arm push-ups 101, 102.
Speaker 1 (35:41):
Every toy it's got inside are completely strewn
across its room.
Speaker 2 (35:47):
It ripped all its toys apart.
Speaker 3 (35:48):
It's sparring with the other dogs right now.
Speaker 2 (35:53):
There was another dog , a compas, but that one kind of
stayed back.
That was a barker.
Speaker 1 (35:58):
Yeah, you ever seen Jurassic Park where the run
raptors looking at the guy rightin the face, he realizes the
one's on the side.
Clever girl, that dog was asetup.
Speaker 2 (36:11):
He got attacked by a raptor.
Speaker 1 (36:12):
You probably saw it at the end of the hall.
You don't even remember like aghost or an alien like you want
to hear what's crazy.
Speaker 3 (36:18):
Both times on job sites that I've been bitten,
it's been in their backyard well, maybe they shouldn't go to the
backyard.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
Well, that's the dog's domain for sure is the
backyard.
Speaker 2 (36:30):
Yeah I was gonna say that to you when you were
telling the story that you kindof went in.
I know that the person wavedyou over, but you still went
into their backyard.
Oh, I know, I don't think theycan.
Speaker 3 (36:40):
You can actually even sue them, I probably can plus,
I was 100 percent and it doesn'tmatter even if I was
trespassing, I still could suehere.
Speaker 1 (36:49):
Really, I'm gonna tell you a story about how I
could take my dog to your house,and if my dog bit somebody
while it was at your house, itwould be your fault.
So okay, your homeowner'sinsurance would take the blame.
Speaker 2 (37:03):
Let me put it in perspective.
So I have a friend over at myhouse?
Okay, yeah, it has nothing todo with you or me.
You bring the dog over?
Yeah, it has nothing to do withyou or me.
Speaker 1 (37:13):
You bring the dog over, it bites him.
You can sue me, yep, really.
Well, I would say he canprobably try to sue whoever he
wants.
Yeah, he can't sue a dog forone, but I'll be like your
homeowner's insurance would bethe one who would be the one to
take the run.
Speaker 2 (37:29):
Trust me, If I were that kind of person, I would.
The first thing I would do isis like the dog bit me.
All right, Where's my phone?
Call my lawyer.
I'm not that kind of person.
I don't really care.
Speaker 1 (37:40):
I'm not that person either, but like okay.
Speaker 2 (37:47):
If you got to tell him, you gotta be like.
Speaker 1 (37:48):
I told the builder that Because if I do have rabies
, or if I do have, rabies.
Speaker 2 (37:53):
Get the fuck out of the rabies.
Speaker 1 (37:55):
I don't have rabies, don't say that it's too early to
tell yeah, yeah it is, itdoesn't.
Speaker 2 (38:01):
Hey, stop it now, both of you, or I'm leaving this
podcast.
Listen to me.
No, no more rabie talk.
Speaker 3 (38:08):
So one of our neighbors this better not be a
rabies story.
No, it's not rabies, it'sactually much worse.
Speaker 1 (38:20):
One of the people.
I don't know if we can get muchworse, so we got.
You got two minutes.
Speaker 3 (38:28):
So the one of the people at our campground.
It was when my brother had aplace at our campground.
Speaker 1 (38:36):
It was his next-door neighbor, internal bleeding,
lost his leg.
Speaker 3 (38:40):
No.
So he noticed his neighbor wascoming up by himself for a
couple weekends and he had justcome up mowed the grass and kind
of leave and not really stickaround like he normally would.
And you know, this guy wouldsit and have beers with my
brother and they were friendsand whatnot.
And he's like, oh, how come youguys haven't been up here for
(39:02):
the weekends, how come you'rejust coming up here mowing the
grass and leaving and he goes.
Oh, my wife's not doing toogood, he goes.
She's been in a hospital for amonth and uh, I don't want to
hear a story he's like.
He's like it's not looking good,he goes, I think we're gonna
lose her.
And he's like oh my god, likewhat happened.
He's assuming like cancer orsomething they found a dog yeah,
(39:25):
a dog bit her in the foot andit got so infected that it
poisoned her blood and shefucking died after a month for
it.
I hate you.
Speaker 2 (39:37):
No, I'm being serious .
Speaker 3 (39:43):
Even though I didn't, you should really go get it
checked out and the homeownerreally should fucking at least
know that her dog bit somebodyNow my leg is tingling right now
.
Know that her dog bit somebodynow my leg is tingling right now
, and a good dog owner that thiswas like a like an accident,
like she didn't mean to leaveher dog out or the dog fucking
got around the gate or something, will tell you to go to the
(40:04):
hospital and fucking get itchecked out.
Speaker 2 (40:08):
I think this dog is very spoiled.
I'm pretty sure it gets theshot or goes to the doctor every
other month.
Speaker 3 (40:16):
I guarantee you it was probably the first time it
got punched in the face.
You're right, baby.
Speaker 2 (40:25):
It really is working up to kill me tomorrow, but I
don't think a dog less than halfmy size could kill me.
Speaker 1 (40:34):
I'm bringing in my knife.
You said this was amedium-sized dog medium size.
Speaker 2 (40:37):
Yeah, I mean it was like 40 pounds.
Speaker 3 (40:39):
It can't kill you on brute strength I'm gonna punch
in the face again I'm tellingyou, dude, you should go get a
fucking shot punch in the faceall right, what kind of shot do
you need to get?
Speaker 1 (40:50):
I'm gonna tell you right now another fucking dog
bites me.
Speaker 2 (40:51):
The need to get.
Speaker 1 (40:51):
I'm going to tell you right now Hold on, nope, we're
done.
I'm going to tell you right nowAnother fucking dog bites me.
Speaker 3 (40:55):
The first thing I'm doing is going to the doctor.
Speaker 1 (40:57):
All right, Chad Put it in the chat.
Should Jay go to the doctorwith this?
Tell us on the internet aboutyour bites from a.
Speaker 2 (41:07):
Shut up.
This has been the dog bitingepisode.
Thank you for listening to TopShelf Stories, you know.
Speaker 3 (41:14):
AI is probably going to name this.
Adventures in Dog Ownership.
Speaker 1 (41:19):
We'll find out, and you will too.
And it releases every Tuesday.
Don't forget to hit thenotification bell.
We appreciate you listening toTop Shelf Stories.
Top Shelf Stories with J, chris and Tony.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Yo, I got bit by a dog today at work, Chris.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
So you were in somebody's house and their dog
bit you.
Speaker 2 (00:32):
I'm doing their floor and their bathroom and the wet
saw I'm using to cut the tile isin the garage.
So I have to walk 50 feet fromthat bedroom to the garage and
usually this lady, when I firstgot there to the job, she told
me that this, your dogs arefucking mean.
Was it a little tiny dog?
(00:53):
It's like a poodle fuckingthing.
It's a medium-sized dog butlike up to your knees, yeah okay
, why you want to say it's up tomy knees, no, because no,
because it's always Well yeah.
Speaker 3 (01:05):
Yeah, I gave you that .
Speaker 1 (01:07):
Yeah, it's gotten so bad, you're giving yourself the
short jokes.
Well, tony's not here right now.
That's why, because it alwaysseems to be these little dogs
that are so freaking meanFucking nippers.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
So she, my dog fucking bites.
Yeah, yours is a little tinydog this dog bit me so hard that
I have two puncture wounds inmy leg and I have some bruising
around my calf.
Anyway, I was walking out ofthe bathroom was it a chawini?
No, it was a type of poodletalking to the microphones Tony
(01:41):
oh, we're recording.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
Jay likes to do these little interludes here.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
And then what happened was I was walking out
of the bathroom.
Speaker 3 (01:52):
What happened was?
Speaker 2 (01:54):
And the dog chased me .
Speaker 1 (01:57):
Oh, you started running.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
No, I didn't.
Speaker 3 (02:00):
I thought I should have but Were you wearing your
red sweatpants like a matador?
Like a?
What Like a matador?
Like a?
What Like a matador?
What's?
Speaker 2 (02:09):
a matador, the bullfighters with the red.
Oh gotcha, are you sure you'resaying that right?
Yeah, I'd like you to spellthat now.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
I'm not.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
Just start with the first letter.
Speaker 3 (02:20):
No, I'm not a speller .
Speaker 1 (02:22):
I just misspelled it on my writing it down.
Speaker 2 (02:26):
I went with m-a-t-i-d-o-r I think it's how
it's spelled, how it sounds.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
It does not look correct let me check the
internet the internet will neverlie to me.
Let me find out.
Speaker 2 (02:38):
Just talk to text it but here's the thing, here's
what happened.
The dog bit me and I actuallypunched it in the face.
Well, I didn't really like, Ididn't connect very well, but
you fucking piece of shit to getit off of me, you, I punched it
in the face.
Speaker 3 (02:55):
How dare you lay your hands on another?
Speaker 2 (02:57):
man's dog.
This dog laid hands on me first.
I was playing defense role.
What if this was a child?
I would punch in the face too.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
I misspelled it.
It's Madador M-A-T-A-D-O-R.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
Chris, if a dog bit you in the leg, would you punch
it in the face?
It's a fight at that point.
Yeah, I couldn't kick it.
I'm fighting back.
Speaker 1 (03:22):
I'm taking my jewelry off.
If the first hit doesn't knockme out, I'm taking his shirt off
.
Speaker 3 (03:28):
What the fuck?
Back it up.
Take it off these Jordans.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
Starts getting people to record it.
I would have kicked it, but ithad my leg.
Speaker 1 (03:40):
So the dog bit you and you punched it.
Yeah, I mean, I didn't fullyconnect.
Did it go?
Did it go?
So the dog bit you and youpunched it.
Speaker 2 (03:44):
Yeah, I mean I didn't fully connect Did it go Did it
go.
And it kind of like jumped back.
Speaker 1 (03:52):
Did the lady come screaming?
Speaker 2 (03:54):
No.
Speaker 1 (03:54):
Oh, my God, my baby.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
See, she's usually there to stop these fucking
midget dogs from attacking me.
She wasn't there and that's whyI was like fuck, what's going
on?
She's in the bathroom taking ashower or something.
She just let him go and thefucker chased me to the garage,
punch him in the face, wow sowhat'd?
You do about it I don't nothing.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
You didn't do anything about it you see that,
why wouldn't you?
Speaker 3 (04:19):
do anything I'm a dog bite survivor oh, I thought
that super terrible homemadejapanese writing tattoo was the
bruises.
I was like holy shit, oh, nevermind, it's just that little
pimple.
Yeah, it looks like a littleingrown hair on your leg.
Speaker 2 (04:36):
Yeah, I mean, it didn't.
It didn't tear apart my leg,but I got it and it brew I'm
bruising, so why aren't yougonna do anything about it?
Speaker 3 (04:43):
that's because of your iron deficiency.
Speaker 2 (04:46):
Don't say that I probably am.
Speaker 1 (04:48):
No, I'm kind of serious with this question.
Why aren't you going to doanything about it?
Speaker 2 (04:51):
I've been bit by a couple dogs already.
I don't know, maybe I should.
Speaker 3 (04:55):
This house was on a lake in a conical walk.
It's a good way to make extramoney.
It's like a $4 or $5 millionhouse.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
No, because it's not like that, tony, you should
understand this maybe too.
Here's my perspective.
Right, and I'm on this side ofit, so say I'm the homeowner.
Right, and you came to my houseto do a job.
Speaker 3 (05:16):
Hold on a second.
This is really turning into afull-length thing.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
I thought you said you were going to top-shelf
stories with Jay, chris and Tony.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
That's not how it works, Tony.
I think it's how it works.
You can add it in later.
You fucked it up, Tony.
Speaker 3 (05:29):
Well, turn it off.
Welcome to the show guys.
Speaker 1 (05:34):
So look at it this way, jay.
So you got bit by a dog.
The homeowner was in charge ofmaking sure that you, as worker,
have a safe place to work.
You explained to the homeownerthat you were going to be in the
bathroom working.
Your job site was the bathroom,but that you needed also
(05:55):
workspace in the garage.
Yeah, and you probably askedthe homeowner, and they provided
and said yes, you can work inthe garage.
She.
Speaker 2 (06:03):
She moved her one of 16 cars out of the garage.
Speaker 1 (06:07):
This gets to my point now.
Okay, so now you're in thegarage and let's say you're and
this wouldn't happen necessarilybut let's say your tile saw
blade got loose while you wereusing it, it killed the dog, or
a piece of tile got rejectedfrom your tile saw as you were
using it and it fired off andsmashed the window of one of
(06:28):
their cars.
Speaker 3 (06:30):
That the dog was in.
Speaker 1 (06:33):
And the dog died.
This is a situation similar toa dog biting you that no one
really expected to have happen,right, yeah, now you complete
the job and you tell thehomeowner hey, while I was in
the garage, a piece of tile wentoff and chipped a window of
your car.
(06:53):
Do you think the homeowner'sgonna say, oh man, that's wild,
I can't believe that happened.
Thanks for letting me know.
I feel so bad for putting mycar there.
Do you need a glass of water,are you okay?
No, but when the dog bit you,it wasn't expected, right, but
(07:17):
there's damages that were caused, right?
Speaker 2 (07:22):
so as someone who's there.
Speaker 1 (07:23):
So I'm saying this like you have to look at it, you
might go into a hundred housesand not have anything happen,
but every once in a while youaccidentally destroy their door
or break a window or whatever,and you compensate them by
giving them money off the job orpaying for the damages.
Right?
Speaker 2 (07:41):
Because that's what you do Not saying anything or
not saying anything.
Well so do you think the?
Speaker 1 (07:46):
homeowner's going to not say anything if you broke
their bathroom mirror.
Speaker 2 (07:52):
Yeah, they would say something Okay.
Speaker 1 (07:55):
So you didn't even tell the lady, the dog bit you.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
No.
Speaker 1 (07:58):
Oh bro.
Speaker 2 (07:59):
Because I punched it in the face.
I thought that was retribution.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
Now it's going to be her dogs down her cam at her
house, her house, danny cams andshe's gonna sue you for hitting
their dog.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
It's all right, it was deep, but they'll see what
really happened how do you thinkthey got such a nice house,
dude?
Speaker 3 (08:15):
so now, how are you gonna deal with this rabies?
Speaker 2 (08:18):
why do you say that shit?
Why you fuck with me, dude?
My wife said the same thing.
She's like you better haveshots, have shots.
I'm like what, talk about shots?
Are you going back to thisplace?
Yeah, tomorrow morning.
She's like she told me thisgoing there about tomorrow
morning to grout.
And she's like what time areyou coming?
I said, uh, eight, three, nine.
And she's I'm like make sure oryou will.
(08:47):
Yeah, see now.
Now it's too late.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
I'm walking in with the fucking Pipe iron You'll be
wearing, like a chainsaw, man'sleather outfit.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
I was thinking about wearing, yeah, something like
I'm gonna tape some magazinesAround my ankles and my legs so
that if it bites me this time itwon't pierce me, just like you
do with zombies.
We know they can't bite throughthe magazines you tape around
your arm um you ever see thatmovie?
Speaker 3 (09:11):
so the two times that I've been brutally attacked by
dogs on job sites?
Speaker 1 (09:18):
um, looking back on it now, all I see it is is
missed opportunities so, tony,when you say no, it's not that
you like want to change yourentire life trajectory by suing
the shit out of someone andclaiming you know this.
What are they call that?
A white flag?
Like it's not.
You're not.
I'm not saying that Jay's needsto like make this huge deal out
(09:42):
of the fact that he got bit.
But if you got bit by my dog atmy house and you didn't tell me
, I'd be kind of pissed actually, because if you tell me at
least, then I can be like areyou fine?
Can I have you sign this sheetof paper?
You're not going to sue my assnow.
Speaker 2 (09:56):
Let me buy you guys lunch the rest of the time
you're here.
I'd feel terrible.
I can sue.
Speaker 1 (10:06):
I don't think you need to sue, but like you can
definitely sue you sure couldabsolutely.
You got attacked by a free adog that the woman or the
homeowner had stated to you wasa mean dog might bite you like,
yeah, well, yeah, don't, don'tcome closer, don't look at it,
don't try to pet it.
You certainly could sue, bro,but not anymore, because you
(10:28):
didn't say anything.
But I don't know why you I'mnot saying you definitely can.
I'm not saying, you should sue,I'm not gonna sue and I'm not
saying like this, like youshould sue a little bit yeah
like don't go crazy with it,I'll charge extra hundred
dollars in the bill.
Speaker 3 (10:42):
No, no, no, you should get at least at least a
year's worth of salary for aneedle hole no, because now it's
, it's the, the trauma of it.
You're already afraid ofeverything.
You're a hypochondriac.
Now you got to deal with rabiesand and now you're gonna be you
(11:07):
.
You won't work in anybody'shouse with a dog now.
So now this is like a wholelifespan of missed opportunities
.
Speaker 1 (11:14):
Oh man, you're really taking this down the lane at
judge judy's judgment here.
You started it, chris.
Well, no, because I'm justsaying like so the last.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
So the last time I got bit on a job site, it was
well, it wasn't even a job siteyet, it was an estimate.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
You're looking at what your future holds if you
get that job.
Speaker 3 (11:36):
I did get that job and I did have a very special
set of rules for that job, andalso I itemized all my shit that
it fucked up.
What did it?
What did this dog do it?
It?
Uh well, it bit me right here.
It ripped my pants.
(11:57):
I had fucking blood all over myshoes.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
I made is this right in front of the, the uh guy
owner see, this is a bigger bitethan what.
Speaker 3 (12:06):
Yeah, no, I got, but this is a little freaking well,
this was kind of an interestingstory, right, because I go to
this estimate and it's at thisbig, fucking beautiful house and
it's, it's one of these bigcement staircases to walk up it
and fucking fountain on, uh, bythe vestibule, you know, and I'm
standing at the front door andit's no, I don't know, but go on
(12:29):
it's these big double glassdoors that look straight through
the house.
So while I'm knocking on thedoor and I don't know who the
fuck these people are like I Iknow nothing about them, I no
context I see a man and a womanin the backyard playing with a
dog and they're like in theirearly 30s and he kind of sees me
(12:56):
through the house and likewaves me to walk back and I
don't know if he's trying totell me to walk through the
house or go around, but I'm like, well, fuck it, he's waving me
in and I I go to open the doorand it's locked.
So I'm like, all right, well,now I gotta walk around the
house because he's fucking fucktired.
Yeah, I'm not doing aren'tcoming in open.
(13:17):
I'm not doing this up, so I walkaround to the back of the house
and they had a dog called aweimer reiner yeah, which is a
big gray hunting dog.
They're not good like familypets or anything, but they're
amazing bird hunting dogs.
So I go around back and now I'm.
Now I'm like in this dog shit.
(13:39):
And this dog runs up andfucking starts attacking me.
Like attacking me Instantly,yes, Like it's seen me turn the
corner and it fucking runs fullspeed at me and.
I'm like what did you do when itran at you?
I'm like, oh shit, Did you back?
Speaker 2 (13:57):
up?
No, I stood my ground.
Did you grab the knife out theback of your pocket that you
keep there and start swiping?
Speaker 3 (14:03):
I didn't.
I said I stood my ground, Igrabbed it by its fucking throat
after it bit you no it didn'tbite me yet.
Well, maybe that's why you wereattacking it.
Well, it jumped at me, like atmy face, and I grabbed it by its
neck and I was fucking chokingit and I threw the dog away from
me and I yelled for thesepeople to get their dog and
(14:23):
they're just standing therestaring.
Speaker 1 (14:25):
I was going to ask what the hell are they doing?
Speaker 3 (14:28):
They're literally just, they're 40 yards from me,
just fucking staring at me goingoh my God, what do we do?
What do we do?
And I throw their dog back athim and I'm like get your
fucking dog.
And the dog starts running backtoward him and he gets about
halfway there and then turnsaround and fucking runs back at
me and I'm like what the fuck?
(14:49):
And it's, oh god, it's runningat me and I, I fucking.
That's when he took off when itjumps at me.
I fucking like swatted it by theside of its head and like
pushed it back the other way andI'm like, okay, it's, it's done
.
It's gonna go back now like itwas just seeing one more time.
(15:10):
It was giving it the oldcollege try.
It's gonna try to get me and Iassume it's, it's gonna run so
do you remember?
The body of this dog back.
Speaker 1 (15:20):
So you remember in your head like okay, I got
attacked, I won, it's defeated,it's walking away now like it
you.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
You were like all right, that's over yeah, I'm
like that's over, it's gonna goback by them, they're gonna get
it in the fucking house.
They still haven't doneanything.
I mean it seems like fuckingminutes and like a half hour,
but it's like been like nineseconds right.
So I I shoo this dog away fromme, I get its head pointed the
(15:48):
other way and like I'm fuckingyelling at them to get their
fucking dog and they're likecome here, rex, or whatever the
fuck it's, come here, come here,boy.
And uh, when I get its headpointed away from me and its ass
pointed toward me, I assumeit's going to run back.
(16:10):
And instead it immediatelyturns around and fucking bites
my leg, yikes.
And then I choke the dogunconscious.
So I choke the thing until it'sfucking laying there.
Oh, my.
God.
Speaker 1 (16:23):
And they murdered a dog.
They're still not.
These homeowners are still notStill haven't done anything.
Speaker 3 (16:28):
Come on, it takes at least.
And the dog's laying there, I'mstraddled over it, fucking
choking it, and I'm like, I'mlike yo, you need to go get a
fucking leash and put it on thisgoddamn dog.
And I'm like, and I say to theguy I'm like, why the fuck did
you wave me back here If you gota fucking vicious dog?
And he said, he said somethinglike I didn't think the dog was
(16:53):
going to be an issue.
I didn't think the dog wasgoing to be an issue.
I'm sorry.
Speaker 2 (16:57):
You just look like one of those people that dogs
want to attack.
Speaker 3 (17:01):
So the woman comes back out with a leash, puts it
on the dog.
Speaker 1 (17:06):
Does she have a towel now and a cold compress?
And a high life for you, mypants are ripped up.
Speaker 3 (17:10):
There's fucking blood all over my pants.
It's soaking into my shoe,Jesus yeah you're good.
Speaker 2 (17:18):
Good thing he didn't get you by your dick.
Speaker 3 (17:21):
It looked like it was close where you showed me.
I was like, and I saidsomething, and they're like,
well, what are you here for?
They waved you back.
They didn't even know what youwere there for.
I'm like we had an appointment.
Like you set this up with meand are you high up with me?
(17:45):
And uh, are you high?
And they're like, oh, it was,you probably have an appointment
with my dad, well.
And I'm like, oh, you guys arejust fucking full adults that
still live with your parents.
Speaker 2 (17:52):
Oh, okay wow, it was a sister.
Speaker 3 (17:56):
so these are like the fucking sheltered kids of a
rich person.
Wow, yikes.
And so now I'm sitting there.
They just waved a stranger intotheir backyard.
I'm like you didn't even likedude, I don't know what the fuck
.
Come on, we're having a party,but this older man comes out.
(18:22):
You know his like 70s.
And the guy, you know, he'sdressed in a suit and he opens
up the door and he is like ifyou still want to measure,
that's the area at the bottom ofthe stairs over there, I got
the dog locked up.
he goes what are you gonnafucking sue me now?
And he's doing this while he'son a call and he's holding his
(18:43):
hand over the receiver and he'slike what are you going to
fucking sue me now?
And I said, well, the thoughthadn't crossed my mind until you
brought it up.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
Right.
Speaker 3 (18:55):
And so this was set up through a contractor that at
that time I mean I still dobusiness with them, but at that
time I did just a ton ofbusiness, like they made up for
a good portion of my company'swork for the year.
(19:16):
Sure, so I'm like well, I'm notgoing to start some big fucking
thing about this.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
Like it's a little dog bite, it's fine, like it's
bloody as fuck, but whateverthat's kind of a dickhead thing
to do come out on the phone, noteven get off the phone, and
then say hey, are you assumingeven not even that?
Like, are you still gonnameasure?
So you're sue me?
Speaker 1 (19:37):
That tells me this guy's probably been sued before
for his dog bites.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
Well, so I didn't report it, I didn't do shit with
it, I didn't go to the doctor Ireally should have.
So you have rabies now.
You've been living with rabies.
That's why I'm urging you to goget looked at.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
What does rabies?
Speaker 3 (19:57):
do to you.
Oh dude, I foam at the mouthall the time.
I thought that was just normal.
Speaker 2 (20:02):
I communicate well with raccoons.
I thought that was normal.
When you get hungry, you foamat the mouth, Dude it's really
wild.
Speaker 3 (20:09):
I eat out of dumpsters at night.
Speaker 2 (20:11):
That's normal.
Speaker 1 (20:12):
I'm pretty sure the end, the main, yeah, you die bro
.
Speaker 3 (20:18):
That's what happens, there's no cure for rabies, the
sickest of the brain and you die.
But uh, uh, the the guy's wifecalls me and she's being real
sweet because she doesn't wantto get sued, and and, uh, she
kind of said something aboutlike are you going to report it?
(20:42):
Like you're not going to reportit.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
So this is her dog, she's the sugar mama or he's the
sugar daddy.
Yeah, I got it all figured out.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
Yeah, he's like some big shot physician.
She's a stay-at-home mom whodidn't who didn't happen to be
home for the remodeling projectestimate that she instigated and
, uh, turns out they've had thisdog for like two months.
It was a you know who rescuedwho.
Yeah and and they've had thisdog for like two months and I
(21:19):
was the third person.
That it's like fucking fuckedup, yeah, and if I would have
reported it they would have losttheir dog, which really makes
me sad that I didn't report it,because that dog should be
fucking put down.
Speaker 1 (21:34):
They probably had other people get bit, although
the dog probably just shouldn'tbe in a family home.
Speaker 2 (21:39):
Was this bad enough?
Where you got a scar?
You're explaining that you'rebleeding down the leg into your
shoe.
Don't lift your leg up thathigh.
You point it towards your dickalmost.
Speaker 3 (21:50):
Do you want me to pull him down?
Speaker 2 (21:52):
Yeah, maybe Jesus.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
I don't know why I keep coming here every week.
Speaker 2 (21:58):
I don't see anything, man.
I just see hair.
Speaker 3 (22:00):
No, just hair yeah, because it might have been like
right here, so it was right inhere somewhere so he grabbed you
.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
He didn't shake, he just grabbed you, got you like
punctured your skin.
Speaker 3 (22:12):
He definitely shook.
He's like I felt he shook untilhe couldn't breathe anymore.
But so when I did go throughand estimate that job and do the
job because, like I said, I waskind of in a fucking bad spot
you said you got the job too,yeah what was this.
Speaker 2 (22:35):
Can we go to the part where you gave him rules about
the job, the part where you givethem rules about the job?
Speaker 3 (22:41):
Well, I made them remove the dog from the house
every day before we got thereand the dog wasn't allowed to be
there.
And they're like, oh no, we'llcreate it the whole time you're
here and I'm like that fuckingdog leaves, leaves this house.
I'm like you fucking, board itfor a week, take it to doggy
daycare, whatever you need to do.
(23:07):
Right, we're at their house forlike two weeks and and they
stuck by it and I did chargethem for my clothes, which were
full price.
No, kohl's cash, nothing.
These are 65.
Speaker 1 (23:14):
Union bay these are $65.
Union Bay carpenter pants theseare $38.
Speaker 3 (23:25):
Adidas.
No Kohl's cash.
No man, it was Levi's and Keens.
Speaker 2 (23:30):
Keens are damn.
They make clothing.
Speaker 3 (23:32):
So I got a little over $200 in damaged goods.
Speaker 1 (23:43):
Was that worth it for your?
Speaker 2 (23:44):
traumatic.
That was a line item was that200 worth it, bro, and?
Speaker 3 (23:47):
then, dude, this is like it.
Just thinking back to this week, this was like the fucking
worst week of my fucking career.
So this happened to me and Ileft a job site to go do this
estimate at the time they choseand then went back to my job.
(24:09):
So I go back to my job and I'mwaiting for my wife to bring me
a new set of clothes, becausethese ones are covered in blood,
sure, sure.
And I get back to the house andit was this really cool single
guy who had this big, huge,massive lake house and me and
him got along great and all thisshit.
And I, I get back to a placeand he's like what the fuck
(24:33):
happened to you and I said I gotattacked by a dog.
Speaker 1 (24:37):
You had to do an estimate, not a drug deal.
Did you get shot in the leg?
I said I got.
I got attacked by a dog.
I thought you had to do anestimate, not a drug deal.
Did you get shot in the leg?
Speaker 3 (24:41):
I said I got attacked by a dog at an estimate.
He goes that's about the rudestthing you could do is just let
your dog fucking like.
Speaker 2 (24:57):
Let it go, they're free yeah let it go, they're
free.
Speaker 3 (25:05):
Yeah, like he's.
He's like people are soinconsiderate.
If you have a fucking dog and astranger's coming in your house
, you should definitely put yourdog away, like tell a stranger
coming, yes, and I said no, Iagree a hundred percent, I do
that with my dog.
Um, your dog michelle getsthere.
Michelle gets there with, uh,with my clothes.
I change, go back to doing mywork the next morning.
(25:29):
This fucking guy who was therethe whole time he's retired, you
know he's like, oh, I'm gonnago out for a couple hours and
I'm like, alright, no problem,and I go to take off the plastic
ring around his shower head andand he did all his own plumbing
and he did something with thescrew that holds it's called a
(25:55):
plaster ring, the screw thatholds the plaster ring to his
shower valve assembly on.
Yep, uh, the screw that he had,and it was also the screw that
holds on the cartridge yeah,that's uh gonna make a lot of
water come spraying at you a lotof water I found that out the
(26:17):
hard way.
Never ending amount of water sothe funny thing is is I didn't
have the board up on the backwall, so it's spraying into the
wall and going straight downinto the basement with and it's
like flooding this fucking room.
That happened to be the roomwhere he had his display of this
(26:41):
primitive, irreplaceable bowand arrow collection.
Oh christ, hanging on the wall,shut up.
It's fucking leaking down theselike turn of the century indian
artifact, fucking homemadeballs dude.
And I'm running around thehouse trying to find the fucking
water shut off, that he hasburied in some fucking closet in
(27:03):
the basement somewhere.
Speaker 1 (27:06):
It is a fucking nightmare some of those valves
have what are called stops, andthere's a shut off on the valve
so you can change the cartridgeout.
But those are normally like tendollars more than the other
valves and only used onapartment complexes.
So there's a little set,there's a little screw where you
(27:29):
can shut off right before wherethat cartridge is the water
coming?
You had basically, wherever itwas, I mean if it was in the
city, you had like 18 gallonsper minute shooting out at you.
If it was on some pump system,you might have had 100.
Speaker 3 (27:50):
When you're in the middle of it, it feels like a
lot more than 18 gallons aminute it's.
Speaker 1 (27:56):
That's a lot.
Think about filling up 18gallons of water with your sink,
your sink's spitting out likeone and a quarter gallon per
minute maybe two.
Speaker 3 (28:05):
So so this shit.
I had to have my wife bring meclothes to this job site two
days in a row.
Jesus Bro, there was so muchwater, so did this guy end up
charging you for his shit.
Ironically, no, not at all.
There you go.
I didn't ruin Nothing gotruined.
Speaker 1 (28:27):
I mean, if they're old enough, they've been wet
before Right.
They weren't baseball cards.
Speaker 3 (28:33):
He comes in.
There's fucking watereverywhere.
I'm down in the basement, hecut.
He's coming down the stairs,he's like.
He's like what happened and Isaid well, I said you had the
screw that holds that cover.
I needed to take off, uh like Idon't understand exactly how
(28:55):
you're saying this is, but likeyou, took the screw out of the
cartridge and he like crammedthat thing like behind it so I
couldn't get it out and thenscrewed that screw back in and I
didn't realize that it was.
That was the cartridge like Ididn't under.
I didn't know that it was.
That was the cartridge, Like Ididn't under.
I didn't know that Cause I don'treally know shit about plumbing
, so I'm like oh, that the theplaster rings being held on by
(29:19):
this screw, which it was, but itwas just because it was jammed
behind it and not yeah.
So this fucking guy's like well, let me dig out the
dehumidifiers, let's get thisshit dried up.
He's like boy, are you having aweek?
Speaker 1 (29:37):
he's cool about it eh that's good.
Cj, you could have told them,and they would have been cool
about it that you got bit by adog, but yeah, that's where this
came from is your story aboutthe dog it spiraled into and
then Tony got bit by a dog.
But yeah, I've been, I've been.
Speaker 2 (29:51):
That's where this came from, is your story about
the dog it spiraled into, andthen tony got bit by a dog and
maybe someday he'll tell us thestory of the other time he got
bit.
Speaker 3 (29:58):
Oh, and you know what , dude, I'm definitely gonna get
bit by more dogs, becausenobody has the common courtesy
to put their dogs away when yougo into their house and what
people don't realize is oh, mydog is the sweetest dog in the
world, my dog loves this.
You know, my dog's never beenaggressive toward anybody, but
(30:20):
that doesn't, that doesn't stopthe fact that I'm a stranger
walking into their house, right,and dogs instinctually protect
their family.
And then also that, see, thisis the other thing, because I
make everybody lock their dogsup when they're not home.
And I'm there because I tellpeople your dog acts differently
(30:40):
when you're not home, becausenow it's on full like protection
mode and fucking circling thehouse and not letting you do
shit.
Speaker 2 (30:47):
I'm definitely getting an attack tomorrow when
she's at the gym.
Speaker 3 (30:50):
So you remember that house?
We did uh when you worked forme.
It was a big ass shower.
Maybe you weren't there.
You know the first job erichelped you on where you had him
do those pebbles we did theneighbor's house.
Do you remember doing theneighbor's house?
I don't know.
It was a master, a masterbathroom and it had a big.
Speaker 2 (31:12):
I don't remember.
I did last month, 1997.
No, this wasn't that long ago.
Is it the one where the ladyput the the pee thingies next to
the front door where littledogs peed?
Speaker 3 (31:21):
and shit.
No, they had a big dog, but itwas.
They had a big rounded bench intheir shower that we we made
anyway.
But they, they had this fuckingwild ass dog and you would walk
in in.
This fucking hallway was like60 feet.
We had to walk down and thatdog would sit at the end of the
hallway and fucking growl at youand not let you walk in the
(31:45):
hallway.
Dude, I carried a fucking two byfour when I walked through that
hallway no, I'm like, I'm goingto have to fuck this dog up and
it became like I sat down withthe homeowners like three days
into this fucking 20-day job andI'm like you guys need to
fucking lock this dog up andthey thought that like I was
(32:11):
being an asshole about it.
I'm like your fucking dogdoesn't let me walk down this
hallway.
It's there in grawls.
I'm like you guys are here.
That dog's fucking sweet as pie.
That dog fucking.
You guys are out of sight.
This dog's a fucking assholeand it doesn't want me in its
house.
I'm like you guys got to lockthis fucking dog up.
I'm not dealing with this everytime and then I'm gonna end up
(32:33):
fucking your dog up and you'regonna be all upset at me they're
gonna come downstairs.
Speaker 2 (32:37):
They're gonna see you holding the dog by a choke hold
choked out.
Speaker 1 (32:43):
So you said your dog bites.
You're just a french bulldog.
Yeah, so that friend of mine,lauren, that I have, she has a
french bulldog she has two ofthem actually, and this one hank
, he, you.
You have to let him bite you orhe will continue to try to
freaking bite you.
But you know, your dog, it's atiny little thing, it just nips
(33:03):
your little hand or your arm oryour whatever.
Speaker 3 (33:05):
But if you don't let it fucking bite you, it's gonna
try to bite you the whole timeyou're there and I bet you she
takes it everywhere and tells no, no, she doesn't do that no,
she puts it behind the littlegate and then if someone's like
you can cut dog, come on.
Speaker 1 (33:17):
He's like she's.
She says that hank will biteyou, it won't hurt that bad, he
won't bite to kill, but he'llbite you and then he'll be fine,
otherwise I'll leave him overthere.
And then he just stays overthere behind the little kid gate
, barks the whole fucking time.
Speaker 2 (33:33):
It's so wild we were at the German beer hall downtown
and my cousin he's always gotthe shepherds and he's not
afraid of dogs at all.
He was.
Someone had a dog outside ofthe bar and it was on a leash.
The dog was just kind ofsitting there and the person,
(33:53):
talc or my cousin, came up tothe dog and the person's like I
don't, I wouldn't trust youcoming that close to it.
He's like I'm fine, I'm fine.
He puts his face in front ofthe dog, grabs it by the ears,
starts petting it and the fuckerbites him in the face.
Speaker 3 (34:09):
In the face.
Speaker 2 (34:10):
Cut his nose open and I'm like Is it a blood relative
?
Speaker 3 (34:16):
Does he have that Wisniewski nose?
Speaker 2 (34:19):
No, he doesn't have a big nose, he has more of a
squished nose.
So he had some cushion there toget ripped.
Yeah, I don't trust him.
I don't care if it's achihuahua, I'm not afraid of
dogs.
Speaker 1 (34:30):
I'm not afraid of them.
I don't care if it's achihuahua, I'm not afraid.
I don't trust them.
I'm not afraid of dogs, I don'tthink it's a problem.
Speaker 2 (34:32):
I'm not afraid of dogs.
I'm not afraid I've been bit bytoo many of them.
I'm not afraid I've not beenbit by a dog, though.
Speaker 3 (34:43):
When you get bit, when you finally get bit, maybe
you'll be afraid, Maybe, and Igot it's fucking like what are
you supposed to do?
Speaker 1 (34:51):
Like you said, you gave Jay shit for hitting the
thing.
You fucking choked it out.
Speaker 2 (34:56):
Like dude, what do you do?
Speaker 1 (34:57):
And then you guys all laughed at me when I said, yeah
, it's fucking war at this point.
Speaker 2 (35:01):
No, man, he did a suplex that I did on a fucking
file drive.
Speaker 1 (35:04):
I'm not going to attack.
I got a bigger operation here.
But if you attack me, I'm goingto fight to kill.
I'm on the way back.
Speaker 3 (35:16):
In good fun.
I'm shaming Jay for fuckingthis dog up, you just do it
regardless of anything.
That dog would have got puntedto the ceiling.
Speaker 1 (35:23):
It's going to bite you again tomorrow.
Yeah, that's why, 100% Dude,it's at home trading right now.
It's chewing on half a cow legbone, just eating into it.
Speaker 3 (35:37):
It's doing one arm push-ups 101, 102.
Speaker 1 (35:41):
Every toy it's got inside are completely strewn
across its room.
Speaker 2 (35:47):
It ripped all its toys apart.
Speaker 3 (35:48):
It's sparring with the other dogs right now.
Speaker 2 (35:53):
There was another dog , a compas, but that one kind of
stayed back.
That was a barker.
Speaker 1 (35:58):
Yeah, you ever seen Jurassic Park where the run
raptors looking at the guy rightin the face, he realizes the
one's on the side.
Clever girl, that dog was asetup.
Speaker 2 (36:11):
He got attacked by a raptor.
Speaker 1 (36:12):
You probably saw it at the end of the hall.
You don't even remember like aghost or an alien like you want
to hear what's crazy.
Speaker 3 (36:18):
Both times on job sites that I've been bitten,
it's been in their backyard well, maybe they shouldn't go to the
backyard.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
Well, that's the dog's domain for sure is the
backyard.
Speaker 2 (36:30):
Yeah I was gonna say that to you when you were
telling the story that you kindof went in.
I know that the person wavedyou over, but you still went
into their backyard.
Oh, I know, I don't think theycan.
Speaker 3 (36:40):
You can actually even sue them, I probably can plus,
I was 100 percent and it doesn'tmatter even if I was
trespassing, I still could suehere.
Speaker 1 (36:49):
Really, I'm gonna tell you a story about how I
could take my dog to your house,and if my dog bit somebody
while it was at your house, itwould be your fault.
So okay, your homeowner'sinsurance would take the blame.
Speaker 2 (37:03):
Let me put it in perspective.
So I have a friend over at myhouse?
Okay, yeah, it has nothing todo with you or me.
You bring the dog over?
Yeah, it has nothing to do withyou or me.
Speaker 1 (37:13):
You bring the dog over, it bites him.
You can sue me, yep, really.
Well, I would say he canprobably try to sue whoever he
wants.
Yeah, he can't sue a dog forone, but I'll be like your
homeowner's insurance would bethe one who would be the one to
take the run.
Speaker 2 (37:29):
Trust me, If I were that kind of person, I would.
The first thing I would do isis like the dog bit me.
All right, Where's my phone?
Call my lawyer.
I'm not that kind of person.
I don't really care.
Speaker 1 (37:40):
I'm not that person either, but like okay.
Speaker 2 (37:47):
If you got to tell him, you gotta be like.
Speaker 1 (37:48):
I told the builder that Because if I do have rabies
, or if I do have, rabies.
Speaker 2 (37:53):
Get the fuck out of the rabies.
Speaker 1 (37:55):
I don't have rabies, don't say that it's too early to
tell yeah, yeah it is, itdoesn't.
Speaker 2 (38:01):
Hey, stop it now, both of you, or I'm leaving this
podcast.
Listen to me.
No, no more rabie talk.
Speaker 3 (38:08):
So one of our neighbors this better not be a
rabies story.
No, it's not rabies, it'sactually much worse.
Speaker 1 (38:20):
One of the people.
I don't know if we can get muchworse, so we got.
You got two minutes.
Speaker 3 (38:28):
So the one of the people at our campground.
It was when my brother had aplace at our campground.
Speaker 1 (38:36):
It was his next-door neighbor, internal bleeding,
lost his leg.
Speaker 3 (38:40):
No.
So he noticed his neighbor wascoming up by himself for a
couple weekends and he had justcome up mowed the grass and kind
of leave and not really stickaround like he normally would.
And you know, this guy wouldsit and have beers with my
brother and they were friendsand whatnot.
And he's like, oh, how come youguys haven't been up here for
(39:02):
the weekends, how come you'rejust coming up here mowing the
grass and leaving and he goes.
Oh, my wife's not doing toogood, he goes.
She's been in a hospital for amonth and uh, I don't want to
hear a story he's like.
He's like it's not looking good,he goes, I think we're gonna
lose her.
And he's like oh my god, likewhat happened.
He's assuming like cancer orsomething they found a dog yeah,
(39:25):
a dog bit her in the foot andit got so infected that it
poisoned her blood and shefucking died after a month for
it.
I hate you.
Speaker 2 (39:37):
No, I'm being serious .
Speaker 3 (39:43):
Even though I didn't, you should really go get it
checked out and the homeownerreally should fucking at least
know that her dog bit somebodyNow my leg is tingling right now
.
Know that her dog bit somebodynow my leg is tingling right now
, and a good dog owner that thiswas like a like an accident,
like she didn't mean to leaveher dog out or the dog fucking
got around the gate or something, will tell you to go to the
(40:04):
hospital and fucking get itchecked out.
Speaker 2 (40:08):
I think this dog is very spoiled.
I'm pretty sure it gets theshot or goes to the doctor every
other month.
Speaker 3 (40:16):
I guarantee you it was probably the first time it
got punched in the face.
You're right, baby.
Speaker 2 (40:25):
It really is working up to kill me tomorrow, but I
don't think a dog less than halfmy size could kill me.
Speaker 1 (40:34):
I'm bringing in my knife.
You said this was amedium-sized dog medium size.
Speaker 2 (40:37):
Yeah, I mean it was like 40 pounds.
Speaker 3 (40:39):
It can't kill you on brute strength I'm gonna punch
in the face again I'm tellingyou, dude, you should go get a
fucking shot punch in the faceall right, what kind of shot do
you need to get?
Speaker 1 (40:50):
I'm gonna tell you right now another fucking dog
bites me.
Speaker 2 (40:51):
The need to get.
Speaker 1 (40:51):
I'm going to tell you right now Hold on, nope, we're
done.
I'm going to tell you right nowAnother fucking dog bites me.
Speaker 3 (40:55):
The first thing I'm doing is going to the doctor.
Speaker 1 (40:57):
All right, Chad Put it in the chat.
Should Jay go to the doctorwith this?
Tell us on the internet aboutyour bites from a.
Speaker 2 (41:07):
Shut up.
This has been the dog bitingepisode.
Thank you for listening to TopShelf Stories, you know.
Speaker 3 (41:14):
AI is probably going to name this.
Adventures in Dog Ownership.
Speaker 1 (41:19):
We'll find out, and you will too.
And it releases every Tuesday.
Don't forget to hit thenotification bell.
We appreciate you listening toTop Shelf Stories.
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