May 25, 2025 • 6 mins
Our podcast intro goes hilariously off the rails when a host makes an unexpected comment with his mic on, leading to a completely unfiltered conversation about studio equipment needs and absurd fundraising ideas.
• Discussion about needing to revamp our podcast studio with proper tables and microphone stands
• Joke about starting a fundraiser with questionable content creation strategies
• Deep dive into the economics of subscription-based content platforms
• Questioning why people pay for content on platforms like OnlyFans
• Theories about the value of interaction and personalization in paid digital content
• Recognition that we've completely derailed the episode with our tangential conversation
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Top Shelf Stories with J, chris and Tony.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Woo, you're fucking.
What'd you call me?
You call me what I heard it,chris.
You didn't know your microphonewas on, did you call me?
You called me what I heard it,chris.
You didn't know your microphonewas on, did you no?
Speaker 1 (00:33):
Ruined the intro.
No, it's okay.
I'm just going to say I needlike a TV tray thing in front of
me here.
The studio needs to be revamped.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
I revamped my whole corner.
You guys have a problem withyour side.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Attention top shelf stories podcast listeners.
We are going to be holding afundraiser.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
We need you to send us donations.
Chris is going to put anOnlyFans out and show his dick.
Speaker 1 (00:58):
No, no, there's not enough money in the world, jay.
Speaker 3 (01:05):
To show your dick to strangers.
Yeah, I heard he's got a reallybig penis.
There's definitely enough moneyfor me to do that.
It's not even a lot of moneyeither.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
I didn't want to say it.
What's going to happen isnobody's going to pay for that
Nobody should pay.
Speaker 3 (01:24):
to see my dick.
What is the lowest amount ofmoney?
Speaker 1 (01:26):
in front of me is too high, I know.
That's why I said you gotta getrid of that table.
Get rid of the table and buysome mic stands.
We're taking donations.
We'll set up the donation pagelater.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
I'm writing it down.
Speaker 1 (01:36):
Tony said he would, it's gonna be sloppy because I
don't have a nice table, so Imight forget tony's gonna show
his dick.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
What's the lowest you'd go?
Speaker 3 (01:43):
see, here's the thing .
I've never been on OnlyFans,but I hear it's
subscription-based.
Somebody doesn't just say howmuch is your subscription for a
month.
Somebody doesn't just say, likehere, here's $100.
Can I see your boob?
How much?
Speaker 1 (01:58):
is your subscription.
Speaker 3 (01:59):
You got to like and I see Facebook is doing it now
too when you try to subscribe tosomebody, they're like oh
subscribe to this person for$4.99 a month and I'm like, yeah
, go fuck yourself.
But I think that's kind of howOnlyFans is.
So, until I got enoughsubscribers, I mean, that would
(02:19):
probably be like the big reveal,right?
Like how do you because you,because you don't just tell me
the fucking price well, if yougot one subscriber and he's
paying you five dollars a month,you don't just pull your dick
out for that.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
I don't know like you got a lot of build, so like
well, I think you do you useyour dick in different ways.
Then you take it, you move itaround, you put it around your
wrist like a watch.
Speaker 3 (02:43):
Well, that's, that's when you start getting a couple
hundred subscribers at fivebucks a month.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
You just sell an option, not sell, sorry.
Just sell a Polaroid on theinternet, you provide them an
option to donate an amountthat's equal to the amount it
costs and is for you to fly tothem and show them your wiener.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
Ooh, how much would that cost?
Speaker 3 (03:13):
No, I don't got that kind of time, do they do that?
All right, I don't know man.
40, 50 bucks.
Speaker 2 (03:21):
But OnlyFans.
They get paid so much goddamnmoney, it's not even.
I can't even fathom it.
Speaker 3 (03:27):
I'm off it.
He's off it, chris is off it.
Speaker 2 (03:28):
I'm off it, I'm off it, I'm off it, I'm off it, I'm
off it, I'm off it.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
I'm off it, I'm off it, I'm off it, I'm off it, I'm
off it.
I was making too much money.
Speaker 3 (03:53):
They get paid a small amount of money from people
that I know have it just becauseI know them, but they will
never admit it.
Speaker 1 (03:55):
But if I took their phone, I know someone that's
admitted it.
Wasn't it originally createdfor, like artists, to share
their music and storytelling,and whatever like a cameo style
option to.
But it's just.
Speaker 3 (04:05):
It's easier now to just pull your tits out and ride
an exercise bike for a couplehundred people to watch
fascinating times.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
The thing that doesn't make sense to me, I
guess it's more about knowingthe person and then seeing them
naked.
But the thing about doesn'tmake sense to me is you can find
any of these videos or picturesonline for free.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
That I also get interested in why there's paid
options and why, like, arepeople so much involved in it?
And I guess so that theavailable window shopping that's
there isn't enough to satisfythe requirements that they have.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
So is it because?
Speaker 1 (04:39):
there's it, I get my, I'm not going here.
I don't know, I have no idea,it is foreign to me.
I'm sure there's people thatthoroughly enjoy this, what
they're perceiving as a socialaspect of the interaction I'm
gonna tell you.
Speaker 2 (04:54):
I'm gonna tell you one.
Okay, I'm gonna tell yousomething.
Speaker 1 (04:56):
My don't tell me people I don't want.
Speaker 2 (04:59):
You can't tell the internet your brother by someone
I know.
Uh showed me his one that hewas following and I I asked why.
I mean, what is the reason?
You're Because you can findthis type of content?
I guess because you caninteract Apparently.
You can get on these livethings and ask them to do stuff,
(05:22):
sure, and then they do thingsfor you, but you also have to
give another donation to them toget them to do it, and then
everybody else who didn't givethe donation gets to see him
shove the cucumber up their ass,or whatever.
Speaker 3 (05:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:38):
Everybody that didn't have that idea still gets to
see like a frozen banana up thegym.
Why freeze it?
Oh man, that'd be so sloppy,especially if it was like a
brown kind of.
Speaker 3 (05:49):
Just get the spotted one where the bottom's
completely black, just put it inand let it bust all right, this
episode is done.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
All right I was waiting for someone else to say
this is off the rails, why not?
What are you?
Gonna just delete it, that'sgonna be episode now?
Speaker 2 (06:05):
no, it's just gonna.
It's gonna go somewhere no, youcan't do this you gotta go, we
gotta get on it.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
Okay, go ahead and just fuck so before we go any
further, I mean my number islike 50 bucks, 50 bucks to do
that long to answer me.
I've been waiting for that forlike 10 subscribers at five
bucks a month.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
They're they're getting full dick yeah, next
time we start recording, jay,try not to use the word dick or
penis in the first three wordsthat you say and we might not
end up here.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
Okay, I won't Thanks Chris.
Top Shelf Stories with J, chris and Tony.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Woo, you're fucking.
What'd you call me?
You call me what I heard it,chris.
You didn't know your microphonewas on, did you call me?
You called me what I heard it,chris.
You didn't know your microphonewas on, did you no?
Speaker 1 (00:33):
Ruined the intro.
No, it's okay.
I'm just going to say I needlike a TV tray thing in front of
me here.
The studio needs to be revamped.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
I revamped my whole corner.
You guys have a problem withyour side.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Attention top shelf stories podcast listeners.
We are going to be holding afundraiser.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
We need you to send us donations.
Chris is going to put anOnlyFans out and show his dick.
Speaker 1 (00:58):
No, no, there's not enough money in the world, jay.
Speaker 3 (01:05):
To show your dick to strangers.
Yeah, I heard he's got a reallybig penis.
There's definitely enough moneyfor me to do that.
It's not even a lot of moneyeither.
Speaker 1 (01:17):
I didn't want to say it.
What's going to happen isnobody's going to pay for that
Nobody should pay.
Speaker 3 (01:24):
to see my dick.
What is the lowest amount ofmoney?
Speaker 1 (01:26):
in front of me is too high, I know.
That's why I said you gotta getrid of that table.
Get rid of the table and buysome mic stands.
We're taking donations.
We'll set up the donation pagelater.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
I'm writing it down.
Speaker 1 (01:36):
Tony said he would, it's gonna be sloppy because I
don't have a nice table, so Imight forget tony's gonna show
his dick.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
What's the lowest you'd go?
Speaker 3 (01:43):
see, here's the thing .
I've never been on OnlyFans,but I hear it's
subscription-based.
Somebody doesn't just say howmuch is your subscription for a
month.
Somebody doesn't just say, likehere, here's $100.
Can I see your boob?
How much?
Speaker 1 (01:58):
is your subscription.
Speaker 3 (01:59):
You got to like and I see Facebook is doing it now
too when you try to subscribe tosomebody, they're like oh
subscribe to this person for$4.99 a month and I'm like, yeah
, go fuck yourself.
But I think that's kind of howOnlyFans is.
So, until I got enoughsubscribers, I mean, that would
(02:19):
probably be like the big reveal,right?
Like how do you because you,because you don't just tell me
the fucking price well, if yougot one subscriber and he's
paying you five dollars a month,you don't just pull your dick
out for that.
Speaker 2 (02:34):
I don't know like you got a lot of build, so like
well, I think you do you useyour dick in different ways.
Then you take it, you move itaround, you put it around your
wrist like a watch.
Speaker 3 (02:43):
Well, that's, that's when you start getting a couple
hundred subscribers at fivebucks a month.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
You just sell an option, not sell, sorry.
Just sell a Polaroid on theinternet, you provide them an
option to donate an amountthat's equal to the amount it
costs and is for you to fly tothem and show them your wiener.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
Ooh, how much would that cost?
Speaker 3 (03:13):
No, I don't got that kind of time, do they do that?
All right, I don't know man.
40, 50 bucks.
Speaker 2 (03:21):
But OnlyFans.
They get paid so much goddamnmoney, it's not even.
I can't even fathom it.
Speaker 3 (03:27):
I'm off it.
He's off it, chris is off it.
Speaker 2 (03:28):
I'm off it, I'm off it, I'm off it, I'm off it, I'm
off it, I'm off it.
Speaker 1 (03:31):
I'm off it, I'm off it, I'm off it, I'm off it, I'm
off it.
I was making too much money.
Speaker 3 (03:53):
They get paid a small amount of money from people
that I know have it just becauseI know them, but they will
never admit it.
Speaker 1 (03:55):
But if I took their phone, I know someone that's
admitted it.
Wasn't it originally createdfor, like artists, to share
their music and storytelling,and whatever like a cameo style
option to.
But it's just.
Speaker 3 (04:05):
It's easier now to just pull your tits out and ride
an exercise bike for a couplehundred people to watch
fascinating times.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
The thing that doesn't make sense to me, I
guess it's more about knowingthe person and then seeing them
naked.
But the thing about doesn'tmake sense to me is you can find
any of these videos or picturesonline for free.
Speaker 1 (04:24):
That I also get interested in why there's paid
options and why, like, arepeople so much involved in it?
And I guess so that theavailable window shopping that's
there isn't enough to satisfythe requirements that they have.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
So is it because?
Speaker 1 (04:39):
there's it, I get my, I'm not going here.
I don't know, I have no idea,it is foreign to me.
I'm sure there's people thatthoroughly enjoy this, what
they're perceiving as a socialaspect of the interaction I'm
gonna tell you.
Speaker 2 (04:54):
I'm gonna tell you one.
Okay, I'm gonna tell yousomething.
Speaker 1 (04:56):
My don't tell me people I don't want.
Speaker 2 (04:59):
You can't tell the internet your brother by someone
I know.
Uh showed me his one that hewas following and I I asked why.
I mean, what is the reason?
You're Because you can findthis type of content?
I guess because you caninteract Apparently.
You can get on these livethings and ask them to do stuff,
(05:22):
sure, and then they do thingsfor you, but you also have to
give another donation to them toget them to do it, and then
everybody else who didn't givethe donation gets to see him
shove the cucumber up their ass,or whatever.
Speaker 3 (05:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:38):
Everybody that didn't have that idea still gets to
see like a frozen banana up thegym.
Why freeze it?
Oh man, that'd be so sloppy,especially if it was like a
brown kind of.
Speaker 3 (05:49):
Just get the spotted one where the bottom's
completely black, just put it inand let it bust all right, this
episode is done.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
All right I was waiting for someone else to say
this is off the rails, why not?
What are you?
Gonna just delete it, that'sgonna be episode now?
Speaker 2 (06:05):
no, it's just gonna.
It's gonna go somewhere no, youcan't do this you gotta go, we
gotta get on it.
Speaker 3 (06:09):
Okay, go ahead and just fuck so before we go any
further, I mean my number islike 50 bucks, 50 bucks to do
that long to answer me.
I've been waiting for that forlike 10 subscribers at five
bucks a month.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
They're they're getting full dick yeah, next
time we start recording, jay,try not to use the word dick or
penis in the first three wordsthat you say and we might not
end up here.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
Okay, I won't Thanks Chris.
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