71. There's No Chicken Nine Because Chicken Six Seven Ate Nine

Support Topic Lords on Patreon and get episodes a week early! (https://www.patreon.com/topiclords) Lords: * Elena * Quil Topics: * Some people put on music and then just talk over it instead of singing along?? Why * Being the only person in a movie theater/concert * A Spirograph but for your butt * Daniel asks "Legacy board games such as Pandemic Legacy or Gloomhaven." * Weird sleeping apparatuses * "House Special Live Frog in Hot Stone Pot" on the delivery menu Microtopics: * A girl who is raised as a boy in pre-revolutionary France and becomes Marie Antoinette's guard. * Turn of the millennium club music. * Finding out that Itsy Bitsy Spider has been about perseverance all this time. * Having to restrain yourself from singing along when you're at the opera. * Trying to eat dinner but you can't eat because you need to sing along to your sea shanty playlist. * Trying to eat bites of dinner during the verses because you keep having to sing along to the choruses. * Properties of sea shanties. * Having a different song for every task. * Everybody performing music before recorded music was a thing, because that was how you had music in your life. * The horrible historical handwriting that historians never show you. * Celebrating the new decade with Cats (2019) and when you walk out of the theater you're the only person in the building. * Seeing Pitch Perfect 3 at 10pm on Christmas Eve and probably ruining a bunch of theater employees plans to have a party in that empty theater. * When you're the only person in the theater, asking the projectionist to pause the movie while you go to the bathroom. * Being the last person seeing an awful live band because everyone else walked out, and realizing that if you too walk out, they'll be playing to an empty room. * A drummer and a guitarist who are both playing too loud to hear each other. * The only live performance you've ever walked out on. * Pooping in a spiral. * Nature's sharpie. * The origin of topics. * A disc that you sit on. * A combination nausea inducer and butt spirograph. * Cake icing videos. * Asking your son what his life is a commentary on. * A shark embedded in a formaldehyde solution. * Work that aggressively annoys the art community. * Ironic cocaine. * Sneaking into the museum to hang up your own work. * Taking photos of a painting and then destroying the original and then taking photos of the photos and destroying the original artist. * Modifying the rules as you play the game. * Opening up more and more of your board game every time you play, like an Advent calendar. * A board game that you learn like a video game. * Memorizing a dozen page book before you can start playing a game. * Copyrighting the concept of a legacy. * Proposing to your wife by intentionally losing a board game over and over again. * The thing you were working towards screwing you over and now you have to undo it. * Trying to think of a board game you've played more than a few times. * Really looking forward to a board game and finally getting it and deciding to just watch your friends play. * Whether it's apparati or apparatodes. * The doublet of apparat. * Wanting to be hyper correct in everything you do. * Buying a tent to go over your bed because your blackout curtains aren't cutting it. * Buying a bunch of weird pillows to compensate for the position your arms automatically get into when you sleep. * How CPAP machines all have a SIM card and phone home with your sleep behavior and there's no way to turn it off. * Nasal pillows. * Sleeping with a weird contraption blowing air into your face constantly. * Discovering that it is much easier to fall asleep when you are very tired at the end of the day. * Ranking your morningness and eveningness. * Sleeping in a hammock. * Making a nest of pillows around you. * Putting on your velcro pajamas and jumping onto the velcro wall to fall asleep. * Your velcro bed waking you up with a loud ripping sound every time you switch positions. * Time-release velcro. * Ice velcro. * Making a salt igloo at the salt flats. * A weighted blanket that is so heavy you can't get up until a crane rescues you. * Sleeping under a chainmail sheet. * A quilt made out of beanbags. * The first thing you searched for when you got on the internet. * Youtube videos about your idealized farm life. * Ordering a pet frog from your Szechuan delivery menu. * Getting Hot Pot delivered and the Pot arrives cold. * Ordering Chicken 65 because there are no other numbered items on the menu. * Not wanting to eat animals whole because there's poop in there. * Frog Fractions 65. * If Chicken 6 was so good, why isn't there a Chicken 6 5? * A Kidz Bop version of Ocean's 11.