February 6, 2025 • 23 mins
What’s on your mind, unicorn? 🦄 Send me a text!
In Tuesday’s episode, Angelina Rosario shared her powerful journey of balancing a corporate career and entrepreneurship while showing up authentically online. Today, I’m threading out one key takeaway: self-worth isn’t measured by likes, titles, or approval—it’s about how you choose to show up.
So many of us hesitate to post, afraid of how we’ll be perceived—especially if we’re navigating multiple roles like Angelina does. But here’s the truth: you don’t have to shrink or fit into a mold to be taken seriously. In this episode, I’ll unpack why it’s okay to be your full, multifaceted self on social media, even in professional spaces. Plus, I’ll share practical ways to shift from seeking external validation to standing confidently in your truth.
What you’ll take away from this episode:
✨ Why it’s okay to show up as as yourself online, even if you're both a corporate leader and an entrepreneur
✨ How to stop letting fear dictate how (or if) you show up
✨ A simple mindset shift to release the need for external approval
✨ A short breathwork session to help you reconnect with your true worth
Let’s take a deep breath, let go of the pressure to be "perfect," and step into the confidence to show up just as we are.
🔥 Ready to step into your next level? Join us at Island Awakening in Saint Martin from June 4-8, 2025! Let’s rise together. 🌴✨
💫 Claim your spot now: jenliss.com/retreat
Support the pod:
- Share an episode and tag Jen on IG @untetheredjen
- Follow/subscribe to get updates of new episodes
- Leave a review!
Music created and produced by Matt Bollenbach
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
Hi and welcome to Untethered with Jen Liss, the
podcast that's here to help youbreak free, be you and unleash
your inner brilliance.
I'm your host, jen, and in thisepisode we're going to talk
about how you might be tying upyour worth in social media and
what the heck to do about it.
Let's dive in.
Hey there, unicorn, it's Jen.
(00:33):
Welcome back to the podcast forthis Thursday thread.
It's a Thursday thread.
We are threading out a littlepiece from Angelina Rosario's
episode on Tuesday, so it's cool.
If you have not listened toAngelina's episode on Tuesday,
I'll just pull out a couple ofthreads and we're going to dive
deep on it, what I really wantto talk about.
(00:53):
So, first of all, she shared somany good things, but one of
the really cool things in thisseason that Angelina is in and
what she is stepping into isshe's in a corporate job.
She's also an entrepreneur, soshe's living both of those lives
at the same time, and that issomething that keeps a lot of
people tethered.
They'll say, well, I'm in acorporate job and so I can't be
(01:17):
on social media being myself, Ican't be talking about myself,
and essentially, if you'resaying that, you're just, in
general, saying I can't bemyself.
Which what worse situation canthere be to be in than to not be
able to be yourself?
And yet that's actually what somany of us are doing all day.
Every day is not feeling likewe can fully be ourselves, which
is the whole premise of thispodcast is let's be more of the
(01:39):
authentic, sparkly unicorn,whatever it is for you.
Maybe you're more of a, maybeyou've got a little extra
cayenne pepper in there, alittle spice, or whatever the
concoction is that makes up yourbeautiful magic.
How can you be more of that?
All day, every day, no matterwhere you are, whether it's in
that corporate job or whetherit's in your entrepreneurship,
(01:59):
or whether it's with your familyor whether it's with your
friends you are showing up asyou and you're not feeling like
you have to show up with thesemasks and being a certain person
.
One of the places that we tendto feel like we have to wear the
masks is on social media, andespecially for those who do have
(02:21):
corporate jobs, but even forentrepreneurs sometimes, because
we might think well, people whoare in corporate jobs, but even
for entrepreneurs sometimes,because we might think well,
people who are in corporate jobsmight think this, or I used to
be in a corporate job and nowI'm posting this and what is
everybody gonna think?
And we get very much in thescenario of what is everybody
else going to think and feelinglike we have to live inside of a
certain box.
(02:41):
And anybody who's anentrepreneur has probably at
some point sat down and had thatthought like how is this going
to be perceived?
And really anybody who's evercreated a social media post has
definitely had that thought likehow is this going to be
perceived by other people?
And that's actually not a badquestion.
(03:02):
It's not a bad question to askhow it's going to be perceived
by other people, and that'sactually not a bad question.
It's not a bad question to askhow it's going to be perceived
by other people.
The problem is where thatquestion is coming from, because
are you caring about thatperson and how they feel about
themselves, or are you caringabout how that person feels
(03:22):
about you?
That's the question.
And so what Angelina was sayingwas, when you go to make a
social media post, the thingthat is helping her to be so her
, when she puts a social mediapost out there, even though
she's in this executiveleadership position in sales at
(03:43):
one of the biggest corporationsout there, media corporations
out there.
She does it from knowing thatit's aligned to her purpose.
It's aligned to her mission,and that mission is not about
her being seen as something, asnot being seen as a certain
persona, as not being seen as acertain persona.
(04:07):
Her mission is about how otherpeople feel.
And so when she sits down, sheasks herself, after she writes a
post or as she's writing a postwhat are my motives, what is my
intent with this post?
And that's such a powerfulquestion.
What really is my intent withthis post?
And so much of the time when wego onto social media, we're
(04:30):
trying to paint a certainpicture.
We want it to be pretty, wewant it to be polished, we want
everybody to see how wonderfulsomething is and it might indeed
be and I think that's great andI share all of this today, and
I think that's great and I shareall of this today.
This entire conversation isfrom a space of.
This is my stickiest.
This is my biggest, stickiest,hardest tether and most high
(04:55):
achievers.
That's your biggest stickiesttether.
We care a lot about what otherpeople think.
We care a lot about what otherpeople think.
We care a lot about gettingapproval from others.
We care a lot about thejudgment of others.
A lot of that is wrapped up inour own need for approval from
(05:17):
ourselves, our own judgment ofourselves, the judge voice that
is in our head that isconstantly saying mean things,
and then we look outside forapproval and so this cycle is
there and that's okay.
That's human.
We all have that voice.
For some of us, the volume isturned up really loud and we get
to do practices that turn thevolume down.
Some of the things that Angelinatalked about was meditation,
(05:40):
journaling, affirmations,visualizations, prayer all of
these things.
These five things are thingsthat we could all be doing to
turn down the volume of all ofthose other voices and come home
to who you truly are and whatyou truly care about, and so we
can, at the same time, be takingaction.
(06:02):
You can still be inspiringother people on social media.
You can still be living yourcalling.
Maybe it has nothing to do withsocial media.
If not, this conversation isstill valuable, but might not be
, as you're probably not evenlistening to this episode
because it very obviously talksabout social media.
But we have to get reallyhonest with ourselves when we go
(06:25):
to put posts out there becausewe can actually do this, and we
do it in such sneaky ways thatwe're actually hiding it.
From ourselves it's like thehumble brag, but to yourself
it's like so disguised that wedon't even realize we're doing
it.
And even though I'm alwaystrying to come from a place of
(06:46):
purpose, just like Angelina itdoesn't always come out from
that space.
And so it's this awareness thatwe get to start to get more and
more and more of where is thiscoming from?
What are my motives?
And is this from a place of mewanting to feel special?
Or if you're like me and yourpurpose is that I really desire
(07:10):
to inspire people, I'll give, mypurpose is so that more of us
live a life that, at 90 yearsold, we look back and we say
that was freaking brilliant.
That's my purpose.
That is driving me forwardevery single day, helping people
feel like they're living thatlife that is truly, for them,
their most fun, most vibrant,most brilliant, most joyous,
most amazing, magical life.
(07:31):
That's what I desire for myself.
It's what I desire for others.
That's my purpose.
So anytime I sit down to write asocial media post, it shouldn't
be about does this make me feelspecial?
Does this make me look good?
Does this make me look cool?
Is this going to make them likeme?
It's coming from a place of.
Is this going to make them feellike they can be more of them?
(07:55):
Is this going to make them feellike they can truly live that
life that they know is meant forthem?
Is this going to make them feellike a brilliant life is
possible for them?
That is the space that mysocial media posts should could
always be coming from.
Is it happening every singletime?
Probably not, because I've gotlike the layers of the
(08:17):
sneakiness and all of that inthere, despite all of the, all
of the efforts that I put forthwith meditation and all of the
things.
There's 40 years, 35 years,before I really got into a lot
of the stuff of practice, of theother things.
Those voices have been talkingin my head for so long, and so
have probably yours.
We don't realize all of thetethering that we have until
(08:41):
we're so tethered that we'relike shit, I'm tethered.
So of course, those voices aregoing to be really loud and
they're going to have all kindsof sneaky disguises that they
use.
I call those sneaky snakesAnything that is coming from a
space of seeking approval andpleasing and wanting people to
think that we're okay and knowthat we're a good person, and
(09:02):
know that we're a caring personand that we're empathetic
Anytime that we are really inthat space.
It's coming from a place of fear.
It's coming from a place of usnot feeling like we are fully
loved, that we are cared for.
It's coming from a place of notbelieving fully and completely
in our own magic.
(09:23):
It's not coming from love.
It's coming from fear, andthat's okay because it's so
human.
If anything else, I want you toknow that it's okay that we're
all fucking up on social media.
That's fine, it's fine.
That doesn't mean that we can'tget better at it and that we
can't experiment with.
How could I be more human onsocial media?
How could I be more loving tomyself and to other people on
(09:49):
social media?
What is the world that youreally want to create?
What is your purpose?
What are you here to do andthen move from that place when
you go to put something up?
Do you want to create a worldwhere people care so much about
what other people think?
Do you want to create a worldwhere people feel like they have
(10:09):
to put on a mask or that theyhave to care so much about what
it is that they post that Susanfrom book club might think
whatever Is that, the world thatyou want to create is more
people to have to worry aboutthat, because when you create a
post from that place of youworrying about what they might
(10:30):
think, you're creating more ofthat.
You're creating more of itbecause it comes out in the
energy of what you wrote.
When we come from that space ofcaring what other people think,
we're automatically coming froma place of inauthenticity, of
(10:51):
seeking approval, of seekingvalidation, because we want to
be validated by that person.
We want them to think thatwe're okay Again, that we're a
good human, and that energy isstamped.
Everything is energy.
Your words are energy, yourposts are energy, your pictures
are energy.
All of it is.
(11:12):
We're always exchanging energywith the recipients.
What is the energy that youwant to put out into the world?
Now let's move into what do wedo about this.
One of the things that Imentioned at the end of
Angelina's episode that justreally struck me is she said
this in passing, but she saidyou know, I usually write my
(11:33):
posts a month ahead of time, butshe had previously been talking
about how she just gets towatch how the posts perform,
like how are people respondingto this one?
And one of the things that shehas noticed is that when she
does a really personal post, hercolleagues don't like it, they
don't comment on it.
But when she does somethingabout work, of course it gets a
whole bunch of likes from hercolleagues.
(11:53):
She's thinking they're allseeing it, they're all seeing it
right, and so they're liking it.
She's like this is sointeresting to me, but she's
able to look at it not from aspace of they're not liking it,
they're not liking the postbecause they don't like me,
which could very easily happenif she came from a place,
obviously, of writing it, from aplace of seeking the validation
(12:16):
.
It would also be easy for it tohappen if she wrote the post
and then turned around andimmediately posted it and then
watched in real time, which isoften what we're doing most of
the time.
You write the post, then youpost it and then you start to
see how the response is comingin.
There's so much attachment tothe outcome.
If we write our posts ahead oftime, then there's a little bit
(12:37):
of a disconnect and I think thatallows you to see with
curiosity and wonder like, oh, Iwonder what people think of
this.
This is kind of interesting tosee and we can make it more of
an experiment.
So this is what I challenge usto do Now.
The interesting thing with thisis that people will say, well,
that feels inauthentic.
It feels inauthentic for me topost something that was written
(13:00):
two days ago, or it feelsinauthentic what authenticity
are you stamping into the post?
That's what really matters.
Is it coming from a place today, on June?
Whatever?
Is it coming from a place ofauthenticity for you right now?
Because that's all that matters.
(13:21):
It doesn't matter if you hadthis thought 10 days ago or if
you're having this thought rightnow.
The thought is the thought, andthe thought came to you for a
reason.
It's how creativity works.
It's just always in the etherand spinning around and you get
to either let it come through.
Maybe it wants to come throughin a social media post, maybe it
(13:42):
comes through in the form of apoem, maybe a song, maybe you
pick up a paintbrush, maybe it'sjust in your movement, maybe
it's the way you smile at thecashier at the grocery store.
That creativity, thatinspiration, it's all flowing
through us all the time.
So let that flow through youinto a social media post and
(14:03):
then schedule it to come out ona day two weeks from now.
I would actually challenge us.
What I'm going to challenge youto do is five of them.
Do five social media posts,write them, schedule them ahead
of time.
Maybe they come out like twoweeks at a time.
However, you want to do it.
But schedule those five posts,put them out there and then let
(14:27):
yourself watch with curiosityand detachment.
You're automatically detachingyourself from the outcome.
You're actually adding spaceand time in there for yourself
so that you can physically bedetached, and my prediction is
that as you do this more andmore, you get less and less
(14:49):
attached to who you think thatyou should be for other people,
how you should be perceived.
You're also able to look atthat post to be like hmm, did
that come from a space ofseeking validation?
Did that come from a space ofme being fully on purpose?
So that is our challenge is go,do five posts ahead of time,
(15:13):
wash with curiosity as it comesin and please report back to me.
I want to know how thisexperiment goes for you.
I'm going to do the experimentas well.
I have been doing more, I willsay for myself.
I've done a lot more of that ofknowing ahead of time what it
is that I am going to shareOther times.
Most of the time I share in themoment because that's just how
my brain works.
(15:33):
Of course, as an entrepreneur,I know that it would behoove me
to do things a lot more ahead oftime, but I am going to do this
challenge alongside of you.
So schedule those five posts.
I don't care if you're anentrepreneur, I don't care if
you're in corporate, I don'tcare if you are a teacher, I
don't care if you don't evenhave a job, whatever it is.
This is an excellent exercisefor untethering in general
(15:57):
untethering from approval,untethering from validation, and
letting yourself see theoutcome with simple curiosity
and wonder.
I wonder how?
I'm curious, what will?
Maybe people won't like it atall, maybe there will be some,
and then it has nothing to dowith your worth, especially if
you did it from a place of yourpurpose.
(16:20):
So check back in with me.
I'd love to hear how this goes.
As we do every Thursday, we aregoing to end this session with a
moment of conscious breath,coming together here and taking
just a collective moment for usto pause and be with ourselves
and do a little check-in.
Today we're going to check inwith our heart's desire.
(16:45):
This is one of the veryimportant things that we can do
to really hear our purpose.
What is it that my heartdesires?
So taking a breath into thenose if you're able, and seated
and in a place where you can, onthis exhale, closing down your
(17:08):
eyes, just letting go of controlof the breath and letting your
body breathe itself.
If you're walking, have a nicesoft gaze.
If you're driving, keep yourattention firmly on the road,
eyes open.
You're driving, keep yourattention firmly on the road,
(17:35):
eyes open If you have your eyesclosed, going fully inward,
feeling the sensations of yourbreath as it flows into the nose
and back out through the noseyeah, letting your body breathe
(17:57):
itself.
There you go, when you're ready, we're going to do five
physiological sighs drawingbreath in through the nose when
you feel like you're completelyfull, taking another sip at the
top and then exhaling outthrough the mouth.
We'll do those fivephysiological sighs together
(18:19):
whenever you are ready inthrough the nose and then out
through the mouth.
I'm sorry, as you complete thosephysiological sighs, just
(19:35):
entering a moment of stillness,maybe placing a hand on your
heart, maybe both hands on yourheart, and asking your heart
what is my greatest desire?
What is it that I live for?
(20:01):
Pausing to listen to theresponse.
That response can come in aword or a phrase, a color, a
(20:29):
texture, an emotion, a sensation.
What do I live for?
Letting yourself feel theenergy of that response,
(20:56):
focusing that energy on theheart space, taking another
final deep inhale into the heartspace, holding at the top,
feeling that energy expandthrough the heart space.
Maybe it moves beyond into yourbody, maybe it even moves
(21:25):
beyond the body into yourenergetic field.
When, and only when, you areready, releasing that hold,
(21:45):
feeling yourself grounded inthis desire, in this purpose
Grounded, knowing that yourdesire is your purpose.
It's what you're here for.
When you're ready, bringingyour awareness to the fingertips
Me, giving them a little rub onthe cloth beneath your hands if
(22:11):
your hand was on your heartJust moving the fingertips
gently, bringing your awarenessback into the present, linking
your eyes open, coming backfully into the here and the now,
knowing your heart's desire andstepping forward on purpose.
(22:38):
Thank you so much for pausing tobreathe with me and for
listening to this episode.
I hope there was somethingreally juicy and amazing for you
and that your heart shared withyou what it is that you are
here for.
You can come back to thatmeditation anytime.
Thanks so much once again, forlistening to this episode.
If you enjoyed it, I encourageyou to share it with a friend,
somebody who might get somethingout of it, maybe one of your
(23:01):
fellow friends who mightstruggle with social media a
little bit and how to show upauthentically.
If you really enjoyed theepisode, you can also take a
screenshot, put it on socialmedia.
If you put it on your Instagramstories, you can tag me.
I'm untetheredjen.
I'll always reshare your postsif you tag me.
Thanks again so much forlistening.
You just keep shining.
You're a magical unicorn lightout there for all to see.
I'll see you next time.
(23:21):
Bye.
Hi and welcome to Untethered with Jen Liss, the
podcast that's here to help youbreak free, be you and unleash
your inner brilliance.
I'm your host, jen, and in thisepisode we're going to talk
about how you might be tying upyour worth in social media and
what the heck to do about it.
Let's dive in.
Hey there, unicorn, it's Jen.
(00:33):
Welcome back to the podcast forthis Thursday thread.
It's a Thursday thread.
We are threading out a littlepiece from Angelina Rosario's
episode on Tuesday, so it's cool.
If you have not listened toAngelina's episode on Tuesday,
I'll just pull out a couple ofthreads and we're going to dive
deep on it, what I really wantto talk about.
(00:53):
So, first of all, she shared somany good things, but one of
the really cool things in thisseason that Angelina is in and
what she is stepping into isshe's in a corporate job.
She's also an entrepreneur, soshe's living both of those lives
at the same time, and that issomething that keeps a lot of
people tethered.
They'll say, well, I'm in acorporate job and so I can't be
(01:17):
on social media being myself, Ican't be talking about myself,
and essentially, if you'resaying that, you're just, in
general, saying I can't bemyself.
Which what worse situation canthere be to be in than to not be
able to be yourself?
And yet that's actually what somany of us are doing all day.
Every day is not feeling likewe can fully be ourselves, which
is the whole premise of thispodcast is let's be more of the
(01:39):
authentic, sparkly unicorn,whatever it is for you.
Maybe you're more of a, maybeyou've got a little extra
cayenne pepper in there, alittle spice, or whatever the
concoction is that makes up yourbeautiful magic.
How can you be more of that?
All day, every day, no matterwhere you are, whether it's in
that corporate job or whetherit's in your entrepreneurship,
(01:59):
or whether it's with your familyor whether it's with your
friends you are showing up asyou and you're not feeling like
you have to show up with thesemasks and being a certain person
.
One of the places that we tendto feel like we have to wear the
masks is on social media, andespecially for those who do have
(02:21):
corporate jobs, but even forentrepreneurs sometimes, because
we might think well, people whoare in corporate jobs, but even
for entrepreneurs sometimes,because we might think well,
people who are in corporate jobsmight think this, or I used to
be in a corporate job and nowI'm posting this and what is
everybody gonna think?
And we get very much in thescenario of what is everybody
else going to think and feelinglike we have to live inside of a
certain box.
(02:41):
And anybody who's anentrepreneur has probably at
some point sat down and had thatthought like how is this going
to be perceived?
And really anybody who's evercreated a social media post has
definitely had that thought likehow is this going to be
perceived by other people?
And that's actually not a badquestion.
(03:02):
It's not a bad question to askhow it's going to be perceived
by other people, and that'sactually not a bad question.
It's not a bad question to askhow it's going to be perceived
by other people.
The problem is where thatquestion is coming from, because
are you caring about thatperson and how they feel about
themselves, or are you caringabout how that person feels
(03:22):
about you?
That's the question.
And so what Angelina was sayingwas, when you go to make a
social media post, the thingthat is helping her to be so her
, when she puts a social mediapost out there, even though
she's in this executiveleadership position in sales at
(03:43):
one of the biggest corporationsout there, media corporations
out there.
She does it from knowing thatit's aligned to her purpose.
It's aligned to her mission,and that mission is not about
her being seen as something, asnot being seen as a certain
persona, as not being seen as acertain persona.
(04:07):
Her mission is about how otherpeople feel.
And so when she sits down, sheasks herself, after she writes a
post or as she's writing a postwhat are my motives, what is my
intent with this post?
And that's such a powerfulquestion.
What really is my intent withthis post?
And so much of the time when wego onto social media, we're
(04:30):
trying to paint a certainpicture.
We want it to be pretty, wewant it to be polished, we want
everybody to see how wonderfulsomething is and it might indeed
be and I think that's great andI share all of this today, and
I think that's great and I shareall of this today.
This entire conversation isfrom a space of.
This is my stickiest.
This is my biggest, stickiest,hardest tether and most high
(04:55):
achievers.
That's your biggest stickiesttether.
We care a lot about what otherpeople think.
We care a lot about what otherpeople think.
We care a lot about gettingapproval from others.
We care a lot about thejudgment of others.
A lot of that is wrapped up inour own need for approval from
(05:17):
ourselves, our own judgment ofourselves, the judge voice that
is in our head that isconstantly saying mean things,
and then we look outside forapproval and so this cycle is
there and that's okay.
That's human.
We all have that voice.
For some of us, the volume isturned up really loud and we get
to do practices that turn thevolume down.
Some of the things that Angelinatalked about was meditation,
(05:40):
journaling, affirmations,visualizations, prayer all of
these things.
These five things are thingsthat we could all be doing to
turn down the volume of all ofthose other voices and come home
to who you truly are and whatyou truly care about, and so we
can, at the same time, be takingaction.
(06:02):
You can still be inspiringother people on social media.
You can still be living yourcalling.
Maybe it has nothing to do withsocial media.
If not, this conversation isstill valuable, but might not be
, as you're probably not evenlistening to this episode
because it very obviously talksabout social media.
But we have to get reallyhonest with ourselves when we go
(06:25):
to put posts out there becausewe can actually do this, and we
do it in such sneaky ways thatwe're actually hiding it.
From ourselves it's like thehumble brag, but to yourself
it's like so disguised that wedon't even realize we're doing
it.
And even though I'm alwaystrying to come from a place of
(06:46):
purpose, just like Angelina itdoesn't always come out from
that space.
And so it's this awareness thatwe get to start to get more and
more and more of where is thiscoming from?
What are my motives?
And is this from a place of mewanting to feel special?
Or if you're like me and yourpurpose is that I really desire
(07:10):
to inspire people, I'll give, mypurpose is so that more of us
live a life that, at 90 yearsold, we look back and we say
that was freaking brilliant.
That's my purpose.
That is driving me forwardevery single day, helping people
feel like they're living thatlife that is truly, for them,
their most fun, most vibrant,most brilliant, most joyous,
most amazing, magical life.
(07:31):
That's what I desire for myself.
It's what I desire for others.
That's my purpose.
So anytime I sit down to write asocial media post, it shouldn't
be about does this make me feelspecial?
Does this make me look good?
Does this make me look cool?
Is this going to make them likeme?
It's coming from a place of.
Is this going to make them feellike they can be more of them?
(07:55):
Is this going to make them feellike they can truly live that
life that they know is meant forthem?
Is this going to make them feellike a brilliant life is
possible for them?
That is the space that mysocial media posts should could
always be coming from.
Is it happening every singletime?
Probably not, because I've gotlike the layers of the
(08:17):
sneakiness and all of that inthere, despite all of the, all
of the efforts that I put forthwith meditation and all of the
things.
There's 40 years, 35 years,before I really got into a lot
of the stuff of practice, of theother things.
Those voices have been talkingin my head for so long, and so
have probably yours.
We don't realize all of thetethering that we have until
(08:41):
we're so tethered that we'relike shit, I'm tethered.
So of course, those voices aregoing to be really loud and
they're going to have all kindsof sneaky disguises that they
use.
I call those sneaky snakesAnything that is coming from a
space of seeking approval andpleasing and wanting people to
think that we're okay and knowthat we're a good person, and
(09:02):
know that we're a caring personand that we're empathetic
Anytime that we are really inthat space.
It's coming from a place of fear.
It's coming from a place of usnot feeling like we are fully
loved, that we are cared for.
It's coming from a place of notbelieving fully and completely
in our own magic.
(09:23):
It's not coming from love.
It's coming from fear, andthat's okay because it's so
human.
If anything else, I want you toknow that it's okay that we're
all fucking up on social media.
That's fine, it's fine.
That doesn't mean that we can'tget better at it and that we
can't experiment with.
How could I be more human onsocial media?
How could I be more loving tomyself and to other people on
(09:49):
social media?
What is the world that youreally want to create?
What is your purpose?
What are you here to do andthen move from that place when
you go to put something up?
Do you want to create a worldwhere people care so much about
what other people think?
Do you want to create a worldwhere people feel like they have
(10:09):
to put on a mask or that theyhave to care so much about what
it is that they post that Susanfrom book club might think
whatever Is that, the world thatyou want to create is more
people to have to worry aboutthat, because when you create a
post from that place of youworrying about what they might
(10:30):
think, you're creating more ofthat.
You're creating more of itbecause it comes out in the
energy of what you wrote.
When we come from that space ofcaring what other people think,
we're automatically coming froma place of inauthenticity, of
(10:51):
seeking approval, of seekingvalidation, because we want to
be validated by that person.
We want them to think thatwe're okay Again, that we're a
good human, and that energy isstamped.
Everything is energy.
Your words are energy, yourposts are energy, your pictures
are energy.
All of it is.
(11:12):
We're always exchanging energywith the recipients.
What is the energy that youwant to put out into the world?
Now let's move into what do wedo about this.
One of the things that Imentioned at the end of
Angelina's episode that justreally struck me is she said
this in passing, but she saidyou know, I usually write my
(11:33):
posts a month ahead of time, butshe had previously been talking
about how she just gets towatch how the posts perform,
like how are people respondingto this one?
And one of the things that shehas noticed is that when she
does a really personal post, hercolleagues don't like it, they
don't comment on it.
But when she does somethingabout work, of course it gets a
whole bunch of likes from hercolleagues.
(11:53):
She's thinking they're allseeing it, they're all seeing it
right, and so they're liking it.
She's like this is sointeresting to me, but she's
able to look at it not from aspace of they're not liking it,
they're not liking the postbecause they don't like me,
which could very easily happenif she came from a place,
obviously, of writing it, from aplace of seeking the validation
(12:16):
.
It would also be easy for it tohappen if she wrote the post
and then turned around andimmediately posted it and then
watched in real time, which isoften what we're doing most of
the time.
You write the post, then youpost it and then you start to
see how the response is comingin.
There's so much attachment tothe outcome.
If we write our posts ahead oftime, then there's a little bit
(12:37):
of a disconnect and I think thatallows you to see with
curiosity and wonder like, oh, Iwonder what people think of
this.
This is kind of interesting tosee and we can make it more of
an experiment.
So this is what I challenge usto do Now.
The interesting thing with thisis that people will say, well,
that feels inauthentic.
It feels inauthentic for me topost something that was written
(13:00):
two days ago, or it feelsinauthentic what authenticity
are you stamping into the post?
That's what really matters.
Is it coming from a place today, on June?
Whatever?
Is it coming from a place ofauthenticity for you right now?
Because that's all that matters.
(13:21):
It doesn't matter if you hadthis thought 10 days ago or if
you're having this thought rightnow.
The thought is the thought, andthe thought came to you for a
reason.
It's how creativity works.
It's just always in the etherand spinning around and you get
to either let it come through.
Maybe it wants to come throughin a social media post, maybe it
(13:42):
comes through in the form of apoem, maybe a song, maybe you
pick up a paintbrush, maybe it'sjust in your movement, maybe
it's the way you smile at thecashier at the grocery store.
That creativity, thatinspiration, it's all flowing
through us all the time.
So let that flow through youinto a social media post and
(14:03):
then schedule it to come out ona day two weeks from now.
I would actually challenge us.
What I'm going to challenge youto do is five of them.
Do five social media posts,write them, schedule them ahead
of time.
Maybe they come out like twoweeks at a time.
However, you want to do it.
But schedule those five posts,put them out there and then let
(14:27):
yourself watch with curiosityand detachment.
You're automatically detachingyourself from the outcome.
You're actually adding spaceand time in there for yourself
so that you can physically bedetached, and my prediction is
that as you do this more andmore, you get less and less
(14:49):
attached to who you think thatyou should be for other people,
how you should be perceived.
You're also able to look atthat post to be like hmm, did
that come from a space ofseeking validation?
Did that come from a space ofme being fully on purpose?
So that is our challenge is go,do five posts ahead of time,
(15:13):
wash with curiosity as it comesin and please report back to me.
I want to know how thisexperiment goes for you.
I'm going to do the experimentas well.
I have been doing more, I willsay for myself.
I've done a lot more of that ofknowing ahead of time what it
is that I am going to shareOther times.
Most of the time I share in themoment because that's just how
my brain works.
(15:33):
Of course, as an entrepreneur,I know that it would behoove me
to do things a lot more ahead oftime, but I am going to do this
challenge alongside of you.
So schedule those five posts.
I don't care if you're anentrepreneur, I don't care if
you're in corporate, I don'tcare if you are a teacher, I
don't care if you don't evenhave a job, whatever it is.
This is an excellent exercisefor untethering in general
(15:57):
untethering from approval,untethering from validation, and
letting yourself see theoutcome with simple curiosity
and wonder.
I wonder how?
I'm curious, what will?
Maybe people won't like it atall, maybe there will be some,
and then it has nothing to dowith your worth, especially if
you did it from a place of yourpurpose.
(16:20):
So check back in with me.
I'd love to hear how this goes.
As we do every Thursday, we aregoing to end this session with a
moment of conscious breath,coming together here and taking
just a collective moment for usto pause and be with ourselves
and do a little check-in.
Today we're going to check inwith our heart's desire.
(16:45):
This is one of the veryimportant things that we can do
to really hear our purpose.
What is it that my heartdesires?
So taking a breath into thenose if you're able, and seated
and in a place where you can, onthis exhale, closing down your
(17:08):
eyes, just letting go of controlof the breath and letting your
body breathe itself.
If you're walking, have a nicesoft gaze.
If you're driving, keep yourattention firmly on the road,
eyes open.
You're driving, keep yourattention firmly on the road,
(17:35):
eyes open If you have your eyesclosed, going fully inward,
feeling the sensations of yourbreath as it flows into the nose
and back out through the noseyeah, letting your body breathe
(17:57):
itself.
There you go, when you're ready, we're going to do five
physiological sighs drawingbreath in through the nose when
you feel like you're completelyfull, taking another sip at the
top and then exhaling outthrough the mouth.
We'll do those fivephysiological sighs together
(18:19):
whenever you are ready inthrough the nose and then out
through the mouth.
I'm sorry, as you complete thosephysiological sighs, just
(19:35):
entering a moment of stillness,maybe placing a hand on your
heart, maybe both hands on yourheart, and asking your heart
what is my greatest desire?
What is it that I live for?
(20:01):
Pausing to listen to theresponse.
That response can come in aword or a phrase, a color, a
(20:29):
texture, an emotion, a sensation.
What do I live for?
Letting yourself feel theenergy of that response,
(20:56):
focusing that energy on theheart space, taking another
final deep inhale into the heartspace, holding at the top,
feeling that energy expandthrough the heart space.
Maybe it moves beyond into yourbody, maybe it even moves
(21:25):
beyond the body into yourenergetic field.
When, and only when, you areready, releasing that hold,
(21:45):
feeling yourself grounded inthis desire, in this purpose
Grounded, knowing that yourdesire is your purpose.
It's what you're here for.
When you're ready, bringingyour awareness to the fingertips
Me, giving them a little rub onthe cloth beneath your hands if
(22:11):
your hand was on your heartJust moving the fingertips
gently, bringing your awarenessback into the present, linking
your eyes open, coming backfully into the here and the now,
knowing your heart's desire andstepping forward on purpose.
(22:38):
Thank you so much for pausing tobreathe with me and for
listening to this episode.
I hope there was somethingreally juicy and amazing for you
and that your heart shared withyou what it is that you are
here for.
You can come back to thatmeditation anytime.
Thanks so much once again, forlistening to this episode.
If you enjoyed it, I encourageyou to share it with a friend,
somebody who might get somethingout of it, maybe one of your
(23:01):
fellow friends who mightstruggle with social media a
little bit and how to show upauthentically.
If you really enjoyed theepisode, you can also take a
screenshot, put it on socialmedia.
If you put it on your Instagramstories, you can tag me.
I'm untetheredjen.
I'll always reshare your postsif you tag me.
Thanks again so much forlistening.
You just keep shining.
You're a magical unicorn lightout there for all to see.
I'll see you next time.
(23:21):
Bye.
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